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"Rules and Dreams"
last year, I wrote a little stevensara piece detailing a little moment between them in the big finish audio 'an ordinary life'. I ended up deleting it because I got too critical - but I found it today, and decided to rewrite it! it's very mushy - but I think when it comes to stevensara we need all the mushy happiness in the world, all things considered. i hope you enjoy it!
also I profusely apologize for any spelling mistakes / grammar errors / general fuck ups. it's law school exam season my brain is the shape and texture of a mushed banana đŤŠ
Sara has never felt cold like this before. Every night, the chill seems to creep through the windows, embedding itself in the walls of their little apartment. The snow outside is so thick it has begun to build up on the sills, and sheâs sure itâs only a matter of time until it makes it inside. She watches it fall onto the empty street outside, and Steven hands her a mug of hot chocolate. She sighs contentedly, the rich smell reaching her nose.
Steven is looking at her strangely. Heâs been doing that a lot recently. Sara tries not to think about it.
(Although the comments from Audrey havenât helped on that front.)
âDo you think weâll win?â he says. He seems ashamed even to ask. Perhaps he still sees her as the military stoic he met months prior. Perhaps heâs worried any suggestion, however slight, that their victory is not assured is contrary to her Space Security Service training.Â
Sara stops mid sip, placing the mug onto a table. It shakes as though its seconds from collapsing, sending the liquid flying across the floor. She shrugs. Itâs a shock to her that Steven has even brought it up. Typically itâs Sara - âSara the Strategistâ, he called her once, laughing after she nearly pulled her gun on a pedestrian who looked at her the wrong way - who brings up the wider issue at hand. Steven usually seemed content to settle down. He would ignore the taranium in his pocket if it meant an ordinary life in London with Sara. Thereâs an odd feeling in her chest when she dwells on that fact.
âIâd like to think so.â She must seem more confident in this answer than she feels, because Steven smiles at her. It is a soft smile, one that Sara is beginning to believe might be reserved for her. Itâs miles away from the one he gives Michael in the morning as they head to the dockyard; from the one he gives Joseph as heâs offered another sip of rum in front of the fire. Heâs studying her face, she can tell. His eyes meet hers, his eyes filled with what Sara thinks is an odd mixture of concern; and something she canât quite put her finger on. Steven looks anxious, his shoulders tight, his fist clenched, at odds with the smile from a second ago. It looks like heâs remembering something.
âWhat brought the question on?â
Sara picks up the mug again, barely noticing how much of it has spilled onto the carpeted floor. It can make its home next to the multiple burn marks from one of their cooking escapades. Steven hesitates to answer, awkwardly shuffling in his seat next to hers.
âOhâŚI donât know, really. I had a bad dream last night. I think it was just weighing on me a little.â
This isnât a surprise. Steven Taylor and restful sleep, Sara has learnt, are closer to enemies than friends. She had the same problem, and Steven - ever chivalrous - offered her his stuffed panda. Maybe the lack of him has provoked last nightâs troubles.
âAbout us losing?â
âNotâŚexactly.â Sara can tell from this answer that Steven doesnât want to push the topic. He readjusts his body, as if heâs injecting energy back into himself, his shoulders dropping as the tension visibly subsides. âIâm sure itâs nothing. Iâm sure weâll be fine. The Doctor will be back soon with a plan - he always does that. Knows exactly what to do.â
Sara smiles at him in a way that she hopes is comforting, and she nods.Â
âAlthoughâŚâ Steven continues, âI wouldnât mind staying here like this a little longer. Despite the cold.â
This again. Sara begrudges herself for the fact sheâs starting to agree. Space Security Service Training Lesson 5573 - an Agent always keeps moving. Sheâs been trying to rid herself of these lessons one by one, but 5573 has been an especially hard one to kick. Damn it (Space Security Service Training Lesson 362 - no swearing. This one went quite early. Itâs good to have an outlet when dealing with the Doctor), she does want to stay here a little longer. Itâs been - for want of a better word - fun.
âDespite the cold.â She agrees, laughing a little. Sheâs been doing that a lot recently too (normally at Stevenâs expense, truth be told. How a man can be so clumsy is beyond her). Steven grins, and the two of them sit in silence for a little while, watching the snow fall. Sara doesnât even notice the cold any more, having forgotten about it during their conversation. That is, until Steven places a hand on her shoulder, and she notices sheâs been shivering.
âSara, youâre freezing cold!â He haphazardly passes the blanket towards her that he has wrapped around himself. It ends up landing awkwardly over the two of them, tangling with the one Sara already has. Itâs not funny. At least, thatâs what Sara is trying to tell herself, summoning up some of her composure, but it'sâ too late. Stevenâs usually well-kept hair is splayed over his face at all angles, and she canât help herself laughing as he turns red.
âI tried! Itâs not that funny-â he sighs, feigning anger, but his mouth is betraying him by turning up at the corners.Â
âIâm not laughing at youâŚhonestly, Iâm not!â Sara feels like sheâs fighting for her life to stop her giggles. Steven, clearly accepting defeat, starts to laugh along with her, trying to rearrange his hair to an acceptable standard. The action causes something to catch in Saraâs chest. It feels like sheâs been punched.
Damn it. There goes Rule 264.
[Rule 264 - An Agent of the Space Security Service must not, in any circumstance, entertain romantic feelings. This is contrary to the Service, and is punishable by Termination.]
As Sara Kingdomâs world shifts off balance, Audrey smiles into her cup of cocoa. The laughter floats from her ceiling.
âThose twoâŚâ she sighs, looking down at Josetta. âHow about we make them your godparents if they stick around darling? Maybe thatâll make them figure it out fasterâŚâ
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NOTHING will ever compare to the sheer level of joy I felt listening to an ordinary life for the first time and it's one of my favourite things...
like imagine you've just thought these two characters you're watching a serial of would be a cute couple. so then you decide to see if they've got any more content together. you find said content. you listen to said content.
and in said content, there are lines like 'i see the way he looks at you sometimes'??? the characters are mistaken for bf/gf slash MARRIED multiple times??? they HOLD HANDS and get AWKWARD about it???
anyway stevensara we love you
stream an ordinary life
k thanks bye
#I miss them#a lot#steven taylor#sara kingdom#katâs stevensara posting#an ordinary life#big finish#doctor who
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some things from my twitter (@/escapeswitch come say hi) that I thought the people of Tumblr would like


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Spellbound (1945)
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Cary Grant as Mortimer Brewster Arsenic and Old Lace (1944) dir. Frank Capra
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INGRID BERGMAN and GREGORY PECK as Dr. Constance Petersen and John Ballantyne in Spellbound (1945)
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Ingrid Bergman as Stephanie Dickinson in Cactus Flower (1969) đ
#cactus flower 1969#cactus flower movie#ingrid bergman#stephanie dickinson#my gifs#sheâs so cute bless her :(
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Ingrid Bergman in Pierre Balmain for âThe Visitâ - 1964
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Ingrid Bergman in Dollar (1938)
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Ingrid Bergman and Gregory Peck were both married at the time of production â Bergman to Petter Aron LindstrĂśm and Peck to Greta Kukkonenâ but they had a brief affair during filming.Their secret relationship became public knowledge when Peck confessed to Brad Darrach of People Magazine in an interview five years after Bergmanâs death: âAll I can say is that I had a real love for her (Bergman), and I think thatâs where I ought to stopâŚ. I was young. She was young. We were involved for weeks in close and intense work.â
Spellbound (1945) Dir. Alfred Hitchcock
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Spellbound (1945) dir. Alfred Hitchcock
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current goals : ingrid bergmanâs fashion in the visit (1964)
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Ingrid Bergman and Cary Grant in Notorious (1946).

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Cary Grant as T. R. Devlin in Notorious (1946) dir. Alfred Hitchcock
#hate gender envy wtf do you mean you wish you looked like t. r. devlin in notorious 1946#<- directed at me#cary grant#notorious 1946
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Why wonât you believe in me, Dev? Just a little? Why wonât you?
INGRID BERGMAN & CARY GRANT in NOTORIOUS (1946) dir. Alfred Hitchcock
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