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[sasusakusatellite]

title: always all for you summary: After all that happened, Dominique knew she eventually would have to stop running away — from her guilt, from her feelings, and from Noé . DomiNoe . Post-anime/ch 57. Oneshot. notes: Just finished watching VNC and I love DomiNoe so much. I wish more people were supporting them. This is my contribution to the fandom and I hope more DomiNoe  (and to-be) shippers will read and review this fic in the future. My take on what happens next after the end of the anime (ep.24) / current manga chapter 57

Also, trigger warning! Dark themes ahead. And lots of angst.

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always all for you

“Jeanne…” Dominique began, unable to look at the woman sitting across from her just yet. 

Dominique could feel the Hellfire Witch’s gaze on her. She was the one who wanted to have this conversation with Jeanne, so she had to muster the courage to finish it.

“I’m sorry,” she continued, finding the resolve to face her greatest insecurity. Jeanne was fierce, delicate, tough, and beautiful all at the same time, and this excited and terrified her. While Dominique hailed from an influential family of vampires, Jeanne was just everything she could only hope to be.

“No…you didn’t do anything, Dominique-sama.”

Most of all, Jeanne was just so pure and light and kind, and she was in every sense the opposite.

“I told you I hated you.”

She looked at Jeanne, taking responsibility for what she did, but at the same time trying to keep herself from crumbling apart. There was no excuse for what she said.

“I’m sorry, Dominique-sama. Maybe I did something wrong —”

“No, you didn’t! It was all me, Jeanne,” she countered, her voice cracking. 

Dominique took a deep breath.  “I…I hated myself,” she sighed, looking down, giving in to the temptation to fall apart.

“But Domi —”

“I hated that I wasn’t strong enough, that I wasn’t like you, that I wasn’t someone Noé would…” Dominique trailed off, smiling wistfully, stopping herself before she could reveal her most treasured secret.

She didn’t want anyone else to know — the decade-old feelings she had been harboring for her childhood friend. She especially didn’t want to tell Jeanne, the object of her friend’s affection. On the off chance that Jeanne reciprocated Noé’s feelings, she didn’t want to discourage nor hold her back.

She heard a chair scraping against the floor and found Jeanne standing up, looking at her resolutely.

“But I like Dominique-sama, someone so strong, reliable, caring, elegant, and so beautiful. I admire you a lot and I —”

Overwhelmed with emotions, Dominique stood up as well, reaching over, and pulling her in for a hug. 

“Ah…my Jeanne,” she blurted happily despite her tears.

She wanted to say a lot more, to refute Jeanne’s words and say she didn’t deserve any of that, but for now, she would thank her, and pretend she could forgive herself just as easily as she was forgiven. 

…

Amelia gleefully walked up to her as soon as she exited the dining hall.

“Noé-sama is awake. He is in the kitchen with Vanitas-sama. Would you want me to call him for you?”

Dominique shook her head. “It’s okay. I’ll talk to them next time.”

She said it as if she was just too tired to see them right now. It was the partial truth. The other half was about her not being ready to talk to them, especially not Noé.

It was pouring heavily when she stepped out of the hotel. She looked up at the sky — she never thought she’d feel the raindrops against her skin again after what happened last night.

“Domi…”

She almost turned. It was reflex at this point, to respond whenever he called her name. But she couldn’t face Noé right now. She needed time.

“I’m so happy you’re awake, Noé!” she chirped with her back facing him.

“I . . . Mikhail told us what happened.”

She froze, and then she heard him take a step closer.

“Don’t worry. He didn’t do anything this time. It seemed like he wanted to thank you for your kindness,” he continued.

Even without looking she could recognize the warmth in his voice. She could feel him smiling as he looked at her despite her not reciprocating the gesture.

She clenched her fists. No, I’m not kind. You don’t know who I really am, all these thoughts I have inside of me, this desire that will ruin you and what we have.

She closed her eyes, calming herself, keeping up the pretense. “Ah. I see.”

She heard him take another step. “And I know that to be true! The Domi I know would never hurt —”

“Noé,” she croaked, swallowing the lump in her throat before continuing, “I’m sorry I must go report to Count Orlok now.”

She turned her body just a little, forcing out a smile that she hoped he would catch from her side profile. “Let’s talk again next time, shall we?”

She began walking. And away she did even as he kept calling her name.

…

But she didn’t know where to start, how to face him, how to apologize and just leave it at that, how not to accidentally slip her mask off and let go of everything she had locked up inside for years.

It had been two weeks of purposely avoiding him, of not being ready to be vulnerable in front of him. Not when she had decided long ago that she would fill the hole her brother had left and that she couldn’t break. Not in front of Noé.

She was in the middle of her thoughts while having tea with Luca and Jeanne when they heard the window crashing.

“Can’t you learn how to knock for once?” she heard Luca bark at the intruder.

Classic Vanitas. 

Luca’s tea was spilled all over the table, Jeanne was blushing furiously, and she would have laughed at the scene if things were different.

Dominique saw Vanitas look briefly at Jeanne before turning that gaze on herself. “You . . . I need to talk to you.”

“What the hell are you —”

“Luca-sama. I think there is somewhere we need to go to for now.”

That was all Dominique had heard before she saw Jeanne leaping out of the window with her master protesting in her arms.

Dominique coughed as she faced Vanitas, trying to come up with an excuse to get out of this.

“Vani —”

“He’s been waiting.”

“I . . .”

“That’s all I want to say.”

Suddenly ashamed of herself for running away from this subject for weeks now that even Vanitas saw the need to appear in front of her personally, she squared herself, ready to speak to stop him from leaving.

“I’m sorry for dragging you into that mess. If I were stronger —”

He looked back at her, sighing deeply as he scratched his head. “Look, I called you bossy and annoying and even thought of killing you if it came down to it. Between the two of us, it’s not you who should be saying sorry.”

She let out a smile. “I’m glad Noé has someone like you by his side. I don’t have to worry anymore.”

He then started stomping towards her with frustration and disbelief plastered on his face. She instinctively took a step back.

“Idiot. I didn’t come here for you to be telling me that. Also, don’t assume things on your own. If he is that important to you, then you should just talk to him.”

She hesitated, looking back down.

“Ugh,” she heard him grumble, “I’ve had enough of dealing with you vampires and your drama.”

She glanced at him, embarrassed that she was the reason for all the drama and she was nowhere near resolving it. “Sorry about that, too.”

He shrugged. “He’s still asleep, and I’ll be out.”

She understood what he was trying to imply. She nodded, although still unsure if she would take this opportunity he had just offered her.

“Thank —”

“I’m sorry, too.”

And before she could even react, Vanitas had already jumped out of the window.

…

It was already past dusk when she made the decision to visit Noé. She was thinking maybe she could just check in on him and leave if he was still asleep, or maybe, she thought, a part of her was hoping that he would have been awake hours before that and he would no longer be there by the time she arrived. At least she could justify to herself that she tried.

From outside the window, it wasn’t clear if he was still asleep in his bed or had already gone out. The lights were off, and it was dim inside, the winter clouds not doing much to illuminate any shadows from within. She snuck in and was relieved to see no one when suddenly she heard the door open and close and Noé saw her before she could even turn around.

She was rooted to the spot for a moment, just looking at Noé, taking in the sight of him because even if it was her decision not to see him, she had been sorely missing him every single day.

When his arm twitched forward, she turned to the side, having half a mind to escape one more time.

“Domi, wait.”

She slowly turned her head to look at him.

He smiled warmly at her, and it took all of her not to throw herself against him and just hold him, like what she would usually do under the pretext of being friends.

“Please stay.”

“But I seem to have caught you at a busy time, I can just —”

“No. I was just on my way to see you.”

Unable to respond, she turned around for a moment, taking in a deep breath, composing herself. She just needed to apologize and leave it at that.

With renewed resolve, she turned back around, staring at him once more.

“Noé.”

“Domi.”

He advanced towards her as they said each other’s name. He was looking at her, his eyes, warm, fierce, and desperate, and she just couldn’t bear it anymore. This was worth breaking over.

And break she did, her tears willingly coming along as she shattered into pieces in front of him.

“I’m so sorry, Noé. If I hadn’t been so weak, you wouldn’t have had to go there, you wouldn’t have had to fight Vani —”

“Domi —”

“You wouldn’t have had to suffer, Louis would still be here and —”

And the next thing she knew, she was pressed against his familiar warmth, his arms tight around her waist, his breath fanning against her neck. 

“I’m just glad you’re safe and you’re here.”

Unable to stifle her tears, she continued, burying her face against his shoulder as she did so. “I thought it’d be better if I was gone . . . but then I saw your face . . .”

“I can’t lose you, too, Domi.”

They had both loved and lost once. Noé’s world fell apart when they lost Louis and she was a witness to that, and her guilt of having to be the one to survive, of having to pick up the pieces of him, of having to become the imperfect replacement, of not being enough to fill that space her brother had left, had all twisted itself into self-loathing.

She knew Noé couldn’t bear to lose her after losing Louis. And she knew exactly that it was just the nature of their relationship, of her bond with Noé. He just couldn’t lose the fill-in, too. And she wouldn’t blame him for feeling that way.

“I have hurt you, Noé. I’m sorry,” she muttered as she, too, held him against her.

He pulled away from her, lifting a hand to wipe away her tears. “Just don’t do that again.”

And yet more tears flowed. Despite everything that had happened, even if she saw Noé, the despair in his eyes as he ran hard to catch her as she plummeted to her death, she still couldn’t help but wish that it should have been Louis who was still here, not her. 

She hated that Noé was in grief and that she was not —

“I’m not Louis.”

She felt him freeze, and at the realization that she had just spoken her thoughts out loud, she withdrew from him, unable to look at him, already thinking of running away again— the one thing she prided herself in.

She heard him sigh before feeling his finger under her chin, gently tilting her head up.

“If it was . . . if it was Louis who was here, if it was you I had lost that time, I would’ve been just as miserable, Domi.”

She opened her mouth to speak, but he pressed his thumb against her lips, the rest of his hand cupping her cheek before continuing.

“If I had failed to protect you, if Jeanne hadn’t come . . . ”

From this distance, she could hear his trembling voice as he dropped his forehead against hers, his thumb still wiping at her stubborn tears.

“If you had . . .” he choked, “I would have died, too.” 

With a fresh bout of tears in her eyes, she brought her hand to his cheek, caressing it just as gently as he had been doing. “I don’t want to lose you, too, Noé. You are my only . . . you are my . . .”

Beloved. 

Among all the physical contact they had shared over the years since they were children, this was their most intimate yet, even more so than when they suck each other’s blood. And she wished it could mean something more. She wished he could eventually see her for who she was and let her in.

He chuckled lightly, pulling back to look at her. “It’s a promise then. We shall live for each other, Domi!”

He held one hand up, as if to indicate a promise.

She let out a weak chuckle herself as she held a hand up in return, smiling tearfully at him. “Of course, I will always be here, Noé. I will protect you.”

For now, she would keep her feelings to herself and take them to the grave. She had been carrying these feelings for so long she would carry them alone for eternity if that meant protecting his happiness.

But then his smile faded, and she saw it morph into something else. His eyes bore into hers, and his gaze, serious, intense, and something novel, something else she hadn’t seen on him before.

She watched with uncertainty as he lowered his hand and touched the ends of her hair, lifting them ever so slowly to his lips without breaking his gaze.

“And I will protect you with my whole life, ma chérie .”

…

Fin.

(fic title from Safetysuit’s “What If”

DomiNoe’s gotta be canon at some point, i swear)

[sasusakusatellite]

★ 【みかづき える】 「 todomomo / sasusaku 」 ☆ ✔ republished w/permission ⊳ ⊳ follow me on twitter

[sasusakusatellite]

DomiNoé drinking each other’s blood ♡

[sasusakusatellite]

title: His partner summary: Sasuke was happy to see her, but not like this, not when she was now part of the mission, where anything could go wrong. Sakura really shouldn’t be here. SasuSaku drabble. [ssmonth22 prompt: for you alone, i will be weak]. notes: inspired by a scene in sasuke retsuden (read more of my sasusaku fics on viasatellite)

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Hovering between life and death, Sasuke couldn’t believe his senses. It was her — her warmth, he would always recognize, especially in this prison, in this seemingly unending cold he had to endure in order to fulfill the mission. 

But she couldn’t be here, not in this rotten place, far from the comforts of Konoha and from their daughter’s side. And yet, she called his name, and as he fell into her arms, slipping out of consciousness, he wished it were all real.

.

.

It was real.

“Sakura.”

And now he wished it weren’t.

“Oh, you’re awake! Hold on. Let me just give you another dose of the antidote…” she grabbed his arm, administering the shot. “For that poison to lay you up, it must’ve been something new, unique to this place, I wonder —”

“Why are you here?”

She flashed him a smile. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

That wasn’t the point, he thought. His expression unchanged, he continued.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

She sighed. “There has been a change in the mission. And I’m here to deliver you the news.”

He glanced around the room, surprised that for something as grim as this place, they actually had prepared a pretty decent clinic furnished with medical supplies for the prisoners.

“Sasuke-kun?”

He refocused his gaze on her.

“Tell me about it and then you can leave.”

She folded her arms. “No. I’m now working as a doctor here. I have patients to take care of.”

“They can just hire a new one.”

She threw her arms up. “Sasuke-kun, there are more important things to talk about. We have to figure out how to get —”

He stood up from the bed, inching closer to her, his gaze more steely than before. “You’re not supposed to be here, Sakura.”

“Why shouldn’t I?” she backed away.

He regarded her for a moment, noting an equally serious and defiant look on her face. He hesitated, unsure whether to say what he was about to say next because he knew she would misunderstand.

But he continued, replying in a low whisper.

“It’s dangerous.”

“Dangerous? Are you underestimating me?”

She reacted as he expected, a flash of anger in her eyes. It seemed like she wanted to say more but just then, they heard a soft knock on the door.

“Sakura-sensei, are you there?”

It was Jiji, and Sasuke could only wonder why he would be out this late at night. Sakura darted him a meaningful glance, and he nodded, catching what it meant. He shuffled back to the hospital bed and pulled the curtains around him before Sakura opened the door.

Sasuke had to sit still as he watched his cellmate complain about his stomach. But it didn’t take too long to notice the obvious. Jiji was lying. And Sasuke could clearly see how Jiji was eyeing Sakura up. It felt so uncomfortable, so antagonizing that Sasuke wanted to do something about it. But he had to stay hidden for the sake of the mission. 

Jiji happily chatted away with Sakura until finally, she finished giving him packets of medicine and convinced him to rest for the night. Sasuke could hear the reluctance in Jiji's voice as Sakura escorted him out the door, promising he’d be back again tomorrow. She bade him good night.

Sasuke was already gritting his teeth when he pulled back the curtains.

“And then there’s that guy. It’s dangerous here, Sakura.”

“I, too, know of danger, Sasuke, and I’ve lived most of my life fighting with you and Naruto, haven’t I?”

She held his gaze. “You know I can help you here…just like now.”

It was true that if not for her, he probably would have difficulty surviving the life-threatening effects of the poison that he was dealt with. But again, that was beside the point. She shouldn’t be here.

“But I would’ve been fine either way. This is just one of those missions.”

Sasuke was used to fighting and surviving alone. He preferred it that way. Doing everything on his own was a lot easier, and what happened next was always a lot more predictable, controllable. But with another person in the equation, with Sakura here…

She sat beside him, seeming to choose her words carefully. “If you’re saying it’s dangerous, then don’t you think that’s reason enough for you to have me here as a partner?”

She was his partner, but…

She touched his hand, and despite the years, it never waned — the effect she had on him. “You don’t have to worry about me, Sasuke-kun. I can take care of myself just fine. I’m not going to get in your way.”

This wasn’t about pride, he scolded himself. But at the same time, he was just never good at putting his emotions into words, especially when it came to Sakura.

“You don’t understand.”

She stood back up, recoiling from him. “Well, it’s you who don’t understand. I don’t know why we’re even fighting about this. I told you I’ll be okay and we can support each other. You know it’s for Naru—”

“I would’ve been enough for this mission.”

She scoffed. “So you are underestimating me.”

He jerked his head up. “I didn’t say that.”

“Or you just don’t want me here,” she continued, her breath, shaky.

“That’s not —”

She began towards the door. “I’m going out. Just let me know when you’re ready to talk about the mission,” she intoned.

He followed and grabbed her arm. He knew he could have and should have just said it sooner instead of deliberately skirting around his feelings and hurting her in the process.

After a pause, he sighed, letting it out.

“I missed you.”

She looked at him for a moment as if waiting for him to take it back. But he meant what he said, so he looked back at her with such intensity he hoped she would understand.

After a while, she snorted. “You should’ve just said so, you dummy.”

And then he felt her arms around him. She was so, so warm, and this was real.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be okay, Sasuke-kun.”

“I know you’ll be. I will never underestimate you, Sakura. But I —”

She pulled back to give him a quick kiss.

“You have nothing to worry about.”

“I can’t lose you,” he mumbled in her hair, tightening his embrace, finally admitting to himself his greatest fear.

“And you won’t, silly.”

…

Fin.

[sasusakusatellite]

title: Lost in a dream summary: “You were young, you had dreams, and I wasn’t part of any of it.” Maybe love isn’t all there is, after all. SasuSaku and LDR. Oneshot.  notes:   this is my late Valentine’s fic (another LDR fic) and i was listening to Lady Antebellum’s Big Love in a Small Town the whole time! That really set the mood for this one.

——-

She doesn’t count a lot of things.

She doesn’t count how many hours of sleep she loses trying to save lives and forgetting to feed herself, not the number of times she’s received emergency calls from the hospital, the times she’s had to cancel on her dinner dates with Ino and the girls, and definitely not the attempts her memories have made at cleaving their way through her.

But it’s been seven years, and the scent of roses intrudes into her rather perfunctory sense of smell of washed up, sanitized corridors. It’s the hospital; it’s all a routine until someone falls and hangs in a critical balance between life and death.

But even death becomes familiar after a while.

It’s been five years, she counts, since her fantastic romance blew up into shreds and tatters. But they were young – there was, expectedly, a lot of passion and thrill, but no direction.

Keep reading

[sasusakusatellite]

title: Sand into Silver summary: "You know, I didn't mind at all. Not having a ring." Sasuke didn't either. Not until now. SasuSaku. Set in Sasuke Retsuden (light novel spin-off). Oneshot.  notes:   Contains spoilers for Sasuke Retsuden. Reading this light novel in Japanese (been studying the language for the past 6 years), so I have to do rough translations of the relevant dialogues (there's 4 of them in italics). Also, I lost access to my main account viasatellite (still waiting for tumblr support to get back to me). :/

and HAPPY SASUSAKU MONTH!! for ssmonth22 prompt “Confession"

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Uchiha Sasuke has never been a man of words. He does things the way he knows how, his reasoning very much personal, and even when questioned, finds it a waste of time to explain himself.

He doesn't need to, he reasons. Not when his actions speak for themselves. And they don't lie; he doesn't hide. Over the years of being married to Sakura, he has learned how not to. She deserves nothing less than the real him, after all.

.

.

Sakura is his wife, his family, and all the missions, the distance, and absence in their wake won't ever change that.

"Yeah, but still, you're married so you should always be together."

He stares ahead, recalling Jiji's words. He thought of explaining, of dwelling on the subject for a little longer and presenting his counter-argument. Sakura is his wife, and will always be his family, and under the same sky, they're together.

He didn't.

But as if to contradict himself more than Jiji, he gives in to the feeling that has been boiling inside ever since that conversation. He has yet to put a name to it.

So he takes Sakura's hand, touches her bare finger, and with chakra, forms sand into silver.

"There. Now you have a ring," he says tersely before letting go.

It's his response, albeit late, to Jiji and his insistence on the importance of proximity and proof of bond.

"Don't you wear wedding rings in your country?"

But they're Sasuke and Sakura, and what they share is beyond those. It has never been about being visible.

Sasuke starts walking ahead, not wanting to linger on how his wife is now admiring her hand with the silver band and a beautiful ruby on top of it, glinting in the moonlight.

They are, after all, together here for a mission, and that comes first as their priority. Not him wanting to prove anything to anyone, not him feeling —

"Are you jealous?" Sakura asks, and even without turning to look at her face, he knows that tone.

"No," he answers, continuing ahead.

"What if someone like me took her away from you?"

Sakura has had thousands of patients, and Jiji is just one of them. It can't be the first time that someone has admired her for her kindness and dedication to her work. Jiji probably only admires her a bit…differently.

But Sakura will never be taken away. Sasuke knows that and trusts that to be true. There's no reason to be jealous. He can't be.

Sakura catches up to him.

"Sasuke-kun…!" she hums as she stops by his side, looking at him, a twinkle in her eyes.

Sasuke pauses and faces her. "I'm not jealous."

She smiles some more. Then, it occurs to him. Sakura never hides anything. Between the two of them, it's he who has more reasons to hide.

She stretches her hand out against the moonlight once more, her eyes sparkling with adoration.

"You know, I didn't mind at all. Not having a ring."

"I didn't think we'd need —"

"But this is so beautiful! Thank you…I'm so happy," she sighs, resting her head lightly against his shoulder.

He smiles to himself. "I should've gotten you one before."

"I didn't think it was important. And I like it more this way," she responds happily, still admiring her ring.

It's the little things that he misses the most when he's away from her for long periods of time. Like the scent of her hair: a reminder that someone awaits his return, that he is dearly loved, and most of all, a reminder of everything he needs to protect.

"Sakura."

She looks up.

"I'm sorry," he mutters.

Alarmed, she steps away to get a better look on his face. "What for?"

Sakura is his wife, and nothing will change that. But he now wonders if it's okay, if she views physical distance with the same nonchalance that he does, a logical necessity for their line of work. And if she's okay.

A part of him wants to ask if she ever gets tired of welcoming him home only to let him go so soon again.

"For having to leave you each time, for all those years."

She heaves a sigh, and he detects a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"You are my husband," she starts, stepping closer to Sasuke.

She holds out the hand with the ring he made for her and touches his cheek.

"And nothing will change that," she continues, smiling ever so warmly, her thumb caressing his skin.

He leans into her touch, closing his eyes briefly, the gentle contrast between the warmth of her skin and the metal coldness of the ring reminding him of their bond. He is married to this wonderful woman, to his Sakura.

He turns his face, pressing a soft kiss into her palm. He opens his eyes and smirks when he sees her blushing furiously. She pulls her hand back and turns the other way, folding her arms as if to hide the hand now in heat.

In a huff she complains, "Doesn't mean I don't miss you every time though!"

And in one motion, he's there behind her, his arms around her waist, his face next to her ear. He feels her tensed up for a moment before slowly relaxing into his embrace.

He relishes the softness of her hair, breathing her in.

"I'm glad you're here, Sakura."

She hums in response.

And all thoughts of the mission forgotten for a moment, he slides down to her neck.

"You're right. I was jealous," he rasps.

He feels her shiver. "And I can give you more than a ring…"

He places a firm kiss on the side of her neck, his lips tracing up to the back of her ear, down her jawline, never getting enough.

"Sasuke-ku —"

"…to show just how much."

He spins her, claiming her lips, intent on showing and making his actions speak for themselves.

His hands all over her.

It's been a while.

…

Fin.

(almost went from fluff to smut real quick. O.O)