sayurimiyako-blog

[sayurimiyako-blog]

„We all need that someone who gets you like no one else, right when you need it the most. We all need a soul to rely on, a shoulder to cry on a friend through the highs and the lows”

 ~Ava Max

[sayurimiyako-blog]

Think I found my passion… yeah for the moment

I played violin... a lot this week and it’s unbelievable I have so many creative ideas I can’t decide what to do first and so I started to cover a song which is in my head for like weeks.

I just pulled out my violin and played a few chords and, wow I felt so released. I’m now changing chords, play the main melody on the violin and some sub melody on the piano. This music helps me to feel like me

And since I wasn’t doing that good the last week it’s getting better. I’m meeting some friends this week, doing a photoshoot in the woods (where I’m really excited about) and working on the music and in between I will do some serious stuff which just has to be done

 I feel slightly happy :)

[sayurimiyako-blog]

It feels like i'm drowning. Drowning in things i have to do. I tried To-Do Lists but I'm still standing in front of the amount of work I got to do.

I would like to do them all at the same time but because i can't do that I rather do nothing

I'm so restless and confused. My brain is working all the time,I can't sleep and I constantly judge myself for not doing enough.

Just want to go for a run and just shout it all out loud...

[sayurimiyako-blog]

Something new…

“Why is it important to start new now and let go of things that I don’t need on my way forward, whether they are good for me or are just another stone in my way to the top of my goals?”

Yeah I got my diploma from the German kind of High school about three weeks ago and believe me I had three awesome weeks. But some of my friends are leaving already for internships and universities ore for one year abroad. And they all know what they want and what they want to do and I feel lost

The last three weeks were kind of a mixture of a completely turned biorhythm, party s till 6 am and some really serious talks about the future. And it was awesome but reality hit me right now. One of my best friends left yesterday and we spent a lot of time there to film some scenes for a short movie he is doing for some contest and his energy and passion about getting the perfect shot hit me very hard. I started thinking all over again what do I want to do?

Of course I got some plans, I’ll go to Australia in autumn around October or November, haven’t figured it out yet. Do some work and travel, explore the world, live some incredible experiences.

I hope it will work. But after that...

I’d like to study some kind with engineering but I got a problem. I live in a small village near a town which is kind of big but not big enough. For me there are two options: I’ll go to a university in Munich and stay in Germany or I’ll try to get in a college in the US.

Because I have an indescribable desire to live there although I’ve never been there before. And now I’ve been researching and thinking for a while what I really want and I don’t know it yet. I don’t know what I can afford and one other thing is the long distance relationship to my boyfriend. I can’t stay here forever I want to go and see something new. And I hope I will find it.

But writing this down feels good. And I got some weeks of summer left, it all has just started.

I’ll write

Sayuri Miyako