schizoidthoughts

[schizoidthoughts]

dam…….. that website “you feel like shit” (it’s like a questionnaire / troubleshooting guide for when you feel like shit) really works………………….. im not even all the way thru it and i even half-assed a lot of the suggestions and i already feel loads better

[schizoidthoughts]

covert szpd.

one of the things i dont always see mentioned is how we, or i guess i specifically, dont have a reaction to even the smaller things of life. not just relationships.

for one, if i drop or spill something, i dont react emotionally. i dont get angry or annoyed. outside of me cleaning it up, its almost as though the experience never even happened.

a true disconnect with the things happening around me, even if its me that caused it. a severation between the external and internal world.

things exist, but they dont. things happen, but they dont.

does this make sense?

[schizoidthoughts]

YOU'RE GUILTY OF A CRIME YOUR FATHER COMMITTED; ON SHAME & GUILT

sierra demulder // james baldwin // the mountain goats // dragan bibin // safia elhillo // ursula k. le guin // cynthia cruz

[schizoidthoughts]

Just wanna confess it somewhere.

While generally I do fall under the diagnosis of SzPD, I do sometimes feel like my diagnosis should be revoked because I do enjoy myself an MMO game with my family.

Szpd’s diagnostic criteria kinda sucks. Coming from someone who also has it, it’s too extreme. I think the main thing I would change is changing “I do not enjoy close relationships,” to “I struggle to enjoy close relationships,” because it’s not always so black and white. There are things I enjoy about close relationships, but they’re more difficult for me because of my disorder. Of course, there can also be people with szpd who have more severe symptoms and don’t enjoy them at all, but I feel like changing the wording encapsulates that as well. Also, you don’t have to have all of the symptoms to have a disorder

[schizoidthoughts]

I’m like if a hater enjoyed things

[schizoidthoughts]

I just don’t caaaarreee. I don’t care. But I care a lot though I care SO much. But also I just don’t care at all and never have. But also I do and always will. Hope that helps

[schizoidthoughts]

Virginia Woolf // Clarice Lispector

[schizoidthoughts]

[schizoidthoughts]

I am lowkey unfit for human interaction

[schizoidthoughts]

me: you literally have a disorder. this is symptoms

me: no perhaps my soul is rotten

[schizoidthoughts]

Virginia Woolf // Clarice Lispector

[schizoidthoughts]

Shout out to the people who never had a safe place. Who didn’t have a before trauma. Who were loved but not protected. Who were collateral damage in someone else’s breakdown. Who got fucked up so young that they’ll never know who they could have been.

Shout out to people who’ve never felt safe. I hope you do someday.

[schizoidthoughts]

we do be going in circles

[schizoidthoughts]

I have female hysteria + male loneliness + toxic masculinity + dark empath abilities

[schizoidthoughts]

Maya C. Popa, from Wound is the Origin of Wonder: Poems: “Wound is the origin of wonder”

[schizoidthoughts]

[schizoidthoughts]

shoutout to the people who for the longest time didn’t see a future and thought their lives would be over by now. you made it. you’re still going. i know it’s hard building a future you weren’t prepared for, but i believe in you. you’re a survivor.