scythe4

[scythe4]

the nether is terrifying because it is hell and monsters live there who want to hurt you. however, it gets even more terrifying when you think about Intentional Game Design. a world where you'll die if you try to sleep. you could get stuck there, growing wearier and wearier, until your eyes start to blur with the waves of heat rising from the earth. when you cave in and lay your head to rest the ground will explode. the souls trapped in the dirt will scream with you. you will never be heard. this world will rip you apart for the crime of being human. you cannot win. you cannot rest now. there are always monsters nearby.

[scythe4]

Imagine a war between fae and modern humans.

The fae hide in the woods and ambush the humans, but it doesn't work because of heat vision helmets.

So the fae superheat the trees, and now all the plants show up on heat vision and your back to not being able to tell them apart.

[scythe4]

[scythe4]

Been getting really into orange juice lately

[scythe4]

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

[scythe4]

"Your mother sucks dicks in hell!" the demon screamed. You figured that she would, you've heard enough stories about her younger years to assume that. The devil is creative with punishments, and only the worst of sinners could be subjected to something as horrid as her atrocious blowjobs. She always had a talent for ensuring that she's the only one having fun.

[scythe4]

[scythe4]

I think we should normalise "in-law brawl zones" at weddings. Like if your mom is rancid and sucks and your partner's mom is rancid and sucks, and you wouldn't really want to invite either of them, you could build them a little pen as a containment area, put them both in there, and they can tear each others' throats out without ruining anyone else's nice day.

[scythe4]

An early Halloween cartoon for Guardian Books

[scythe4]

If I was evil and went to visit someone's home for the first time and I know they have a cat, I would rub my wrists with catnip before leaving the house, so when I get there the cat smells the catnip and is all over me purring and rubbing on my hands and the owner is like "omg my kitty loves you! That's never happened with a stranger before!" and immediately trust me because they have no idea that I jammed their cat's evil detector on purpose.

[scythe4]

By using antibodies from a human donor with a self-induced hyper-immunity to snake venom, scientists have developed the most broadly effective antivenom to date, which is protective against the likes of the black mamba, king cobra, and tiger snakes in mouse trials. Described in the journal Cell, the antivenom combines protective antibodies and a small molecule inhibitor and opens a path toward a universal antiserum.

Continue Reading.

[scythe4]

Our neighbors have a goblin statue on their front porch and this weekend they replaced it with an exact replica but 3x the size. I feel like I'm being trolled. Like every week there's going to be an even bigger one until it's replaced the house

[scythe4]

Hey how’s it going? I like your tower, it’s very damp. The locusts are coming. It’s not my fault. Cool hat btw.

hey thanks, i really apprecia—wait what

[scythe4]

Holy shit a lightning bug got in the house and I almost pissed myself because there was suddenly a random floating light and my dumbass sleep deprived brain went: ALIENS??????

[scythe4]

kyaaaa I'm late to vampire school *runs out while holding a dude by the neck in my mouth*

[scythe4]

An idea for a chaotic neutral character.

Someone who is down for absolutely anything, basically 'yes and' personified. They also see nothing wrong with anything they do and will instantly admit to anything if asked.

"Hey let's go save the kingdom!"

"Sure sounds fun."

"Wanna burn down a forest?"

"Alright."

"Kill that guy."

"Ok."

"Did you kill this man?"

"Yup."

"We need to replant the forest we burnt down"

"fair enough"