secretdeficit

[secretdeficit]

I'm going to eat healthily and lose weight healthily.

I'm going to eat healthily and lose weight healthily

I'm going to eat healthily and lose weight healthily

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

Yeah I started a hobby during quarantine too.

It's called relapsing anorexia 🙃

[secretdeficit]

Nothing here ever changes

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

I'm so hungry but scared to eat or cook with people knowing

So I guess I will continue this unintentional 26+ hour fast

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

bad news: i binged

good news: my fat ass ate all the binge food in the house so now there's nothing left to binge on

[secretdeficit]

[secretdeficit]

When I say binge

I do not mean I over ate with a total of 1000 calories for the day.

I mean I went to the supermarket, accidentally.

I almost crashed driving home because I was too busy eating donuts

As if this food were my last.

I then heated microwaveable items first.

While

Eating an entire bag of chips

And dip. Before the timer for 2.5 minutes goes off.

Then licking every last bit of slimy oil off of my fingers before I realise it's too late

With cuts inside cheeks

Burnt tongues and fingers

Do I realize my mistake.

I now pour water into unwrapped chocolate to make it inedible and throw away my self esteem to the birds

But how can you explain to anyone that in a total of 15 minutes you consumed 2500 calories,

239 grams of carbs, 38 grams of protein, 139 grams of

Fat

[secretdeficit]

"fuck my eating disorder" i say, as i binge on everything in the kitchen as if that isn’t. a part of. my disorder

[secretdeficit]

me: just vibin, thinking about getting breakfast

my ed: you look like this

[secretdeficit]

Uhhh yha