secrets-and-streetlights

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got my textile-obsessed roommate into wayneradiotv's gnome series and in return they cross-stiched this beautiful object for me

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I don’t disagree with the Vetenari take however I think he wouldn’t be the direct antagonist in the story.

I think Vetenari would be the equivalent of the cartoon baby in the construction site narrowly avoiding danger. This would involve Moist or Vimes having to do increasingly wacky/dangerous bullshit to keep the Patrician from getting hurt.

I've been thinking of the "Can Granny Weatherwax beat Bugs Bunny" question and this is my full take for Discworld characters:

Vimes - Cares too much, too easy to piss off. Has the innate chase instinct that makes characters run into walls with realistic tunnels painted on them. Might get to arrest Bugs Bunny but the beast will just slip out of the handcuffs to help him lock them, then walk out of the jail cell to have a union mandated coffee break.

Ridcully - Classic hunting season scenario, but has enough charisma to probably still get a few good shots off before the inevitable.

Rest of the wizards - No survivors, only Bugs.

Carrot - The intense near-magical narrative aura of well meaning innocence should make him immune, Bugs will likely be forced to be the villain of the episode.

Lord Vetinari - Flattened by a comically large anvil in the first few minutes of the episode, unclear if it was all a part of his long term strategy or not.

Moist - Has the 'lovable trickster getting away with it' energy, but nowhere near Bugs level. Already fell for the "old lady who swallowed a fly" scenario with the stamp slugs once, won't fare any better here.

Death - Definitely one of those "character is trying to avoid death" episodes, would go back and forth. Might actually get to end Bugs but his spirit will reappear in Death's domain and ruin his garden.

Nanny Ogg - The ultimate in anti-Bugs technology, a gleefully annoying old lady who doesn't give a fuck and definitely won't be the first to instigate the plot bearing conflict. This is a full sweep, he's the episode antagonist.

Granny Weatherwax - Too win-motivated to not lose. Would have to break the story to have any chance. Might do it.

Magrat - Will have sappy ideas about helping the poor animal which honestly has the 50:50 chance of either getting slapsticked or Bugs ending in a ye olde stroller&pacifier gag.

Colon&Nobby - Designed in a lab to be totaled by Bugs Bunny.

Tiffany Aching - A child that also has a large pan that is the perfect thing to hit someone over the head with and make a BOIOIOINGGG sound, so great odds.

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a village child tried to cut my beard today with scissors. naturally I destroyed him with lightning and sonic boom. now his parents are saying I "overreacted". well guess what is coming to them next. that's right it's lightning sonic boom.

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please stop writing "viscous" when you mean "vicious", it produces the weirdest mental images ever

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Glorious 25th of may to those who celebrate

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me: why is nobody complimenting me on my outfit

the chemically preserved head of a giant bat that i keep on my desk: PERHAPS IF YOU WORE SOMETHING THAT MATCHED YOUR SHIRT BETTER YOU WOULD GET MORE COMPLIMENTS. AUTUMN COLORS ARE MORE YOUR STYLE

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the whole pope business is making me realize i know less about catholics than i thought. why does the pope get a new name. is it his popesona

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omg ok put in the tags a food that makes u feel like life is worth living when you eat it. like u eat it and it's soo good and everything's fine actually

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sexual knifeplay is indicative of weak character. I could never get aroused from being stabbed because that would mean that I failed to parry it

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"windows 11 upgrade ready!" "your computer is eligible for windows 11!" "download windows 11 now!"

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Thoughts of Mummy's in WOD? :D

THEY ARE SO FUCKING FUNNY AND I LOVE THEM, yeah you got Paradox shitface? Whatever. Sex feels x100 better for me supernaturally. Die mad cus you don't get to be a cool Yu-Gi-Oh Power Ranger like meeeeee 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

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hey americans there is a recall on testosterone gel because they found benzene in it! please check the lot numbers on your batches, benzene is really not something you want to be rubbing into your skin, also you might be eligible for compensation because this is just insane what the fuck

more on this page:

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I'm opening commissions again! The price is based on the labor (time, energy, etc.) expected to be put into a piece. I ONLY DO PAYMENT THROUGH PAYPAL. DM me if you're interested.

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"the best way to screw jkr over is by making her characters queer!" actually. The best way to screw jkr over is to stop engaging with the property she still profits off of and read a different fucking book

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fuckin based and also really fuckin funny, thank you FBG

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playing his dress up games