sedatedartist

[sedatedartist]

There is something deliciously funny about AI getting replaced by AI.

tl;dr: China yeeted a cheaper, faster, less environmental impact making, open source LLM model onto the market and US AI companies lost nearly 600 billions in value since yesterday.

Silicone Valley is having a meltdown.

And ChatGTP just lost its job to AI~.

[sedatedartist]

people can't talk to me about lord of the rings because as soon as they mention gandalf the grey and gandalf the white and monty python and the holy grail's black night benito mussolini and the blue meany

[sedatedartist]

Typically I don’t do angry tumblr rants but this gbbo smore shit has a cold rage burning in the fireplace of my soul and the words ‘sacrilege’ and ‘heresy’ bubbling up from the depths of my being to be played on loop in mute horror like a scratched record.

So.

This monstrosity is what gbbo was trying to pass off as a smore.

This is not a smore. Look at it. It’s downright undercooked. That’s not even marshmallow. Or chocolate. It looks cold. This is about as much a smore as Cris Pratt is a voice actor. As a corgi is a wolf. As gbbo is apparently competent at research.

Also me to explain what a smore is.

For anyone who doesn’t know what the fudge a smore is, it’s a typical summertime treat often made at summercamp, when camping, or if you live in a place with a fireplace/assess to a campfire sometimes you’ll use that.

Basically it goes like this; it takes five ingredients, gram crackers, any chocolate bar with rectangular pieces you can break off (traditionally Hershey’s as it’s the cheapest and smores tend to be made in bulk, it’s one of those things a group of people make together otherwise it won’t taste right) large marshmallows, an open flame, and as previously mentioned more than one person to make them at the same time. If you make smores alone, the smores too will be sad and alone.

First you take two gram crackers and break off 1 to 2 sections of chocolate. Place the chocolate on each side, so both sides are all chocolatey. Then you take a marshmallow and skewer it on either a pointy stick from the ground or a metal skewer specificity made for roasting marshmallows/hotdogs depending on if someone has any.

Next you, well, roast the marshmallows. If you’re doing this at a campfire this involves a lot of moving away from the direction the smoke is blowing well and minor amounts of giggle-filled pvp as everyone jostles for the best spots around the fire. Mellow roasting is one of those things that is kind of the point of making marshmallows, the epic highs and lows of seeing how close to the fire you can get yours and how long you can hold it there before it either falls off or catches fire is integral to the entire experience.

Once you hastily blow out the one-fire part of the marshmallow, you slide it off the stick and between the gram crackers and chocolate. Then you squish it a bit to get the chocolate all nice and gooey, and bite in.

It’s gooey, it’s very messy, and the closer it gets to midnight the more it’s delicious.

So now we have established what a smore is, allow me to explain how UTTERLY BUTCHERED that abomination of sugar is.

First, we have the ingredients themselves. Paul Bitchwood describes the middle as ‘Italian meringue’.

Italian meringue.

Italian. Fucking. Meringue.

*deep breath*

IS NOT A MARSHMALLOW.

It does not share THE BASIC PROPERTIES OF A MARSHMALLOW.

YOU CANNOT STAB MERINGUE WITH A STCK AND HAVE IT STAY ON THE FUCKING SICK. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A MARSHMALLOW BEFORE MR BITCHWOOD???? WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO THROW THE TOP OF A LEMON MERINGUE PIE AT YOU TO DEMONSTRATE “PAUL”?! IF IT DOESN’T BOUNCE ITS NOT A FUCKING MELLOW AND THE EFECT ON YOUR FACE WOULD BE ONE HELL OF AN IMPROVEMENT!

So already we have the single most important ingredient straight up ‘substituted’ (if you can even call it that) for an entirely different food with a completely different texture, taste, consistency, and behavior under heat.

But there’s more!

See, that chocolate? It’s not melted chocolate like you might think at first glance- no no no, that’s fucking GANACHE.

YOU KnOW, The THing With THE CoNsistenCY of FroSTING???? :) :) :)

The thing that you expressly don’t want to melt when using it in cooking on pain of death?

Thus removing THE ENTIRE PURPOSE CONSISTENCY FLAVER AND TEXTURE OF THE INGREDIENT

AGAIN!

and then. Ohhhhhhh and then.

Those are no gram crackers.

Those are ‘digestibles”

WHAT THE FUCK ARE DIGESTABLES

THATS WHAT HAPPENS TO ALL FOOD ITS NOT SPECIAL DUMBASS

WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF RICH PEOPLE SHIT ARE YOU EATING THAT YOU NEED TO POINT THAT OUT IN THE NAME

WHAT THE FUCK

AND IT AGAIN HAS A DIFFERENT EVERYTHING THEN GRAaM CRACKERS

WHY

YOU DIDN’T EVEN HAVE TO DO THAT IF YOU WANTED IT TO SOUND FANCY YOU COULD HAVE JUST MADE GRAM CRACKERS FROM SCRATCH IVE NEVER SEEN ANYONE DO IT BECAUSE WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU BUT ITS AT LEAST POSSIBLE AGHHHHHHHHHHH

And then. To add insult to injury after FUCKING injury.

It’s a circle.

It’s A CiRcLE.

WHY IS IT A CIRCLE.

IT SHOULNT BE A CIRCLE-

In conclusion; Paul Bitchywood is a fucker and a Tory and I don’t put stock in god but by whatever powers may be I hope hell exists because this fool is running a marathon to it’s center.

[sedatedartist]

[sedatedartist]

Let me make one thing extremely fucking clear

[sedatedartist]

Have A Nice Day!

[sedatedartist]

pray_return_to_the_waking_sands.mp4

[sedatedartist]

[sedatedartist]

[sedatedartist]

Twitter users are defending their right to assume Picasso was a renaissance artist. Tiktok users think watching any film made outside the US makes you a snob. “Replace classic lit with YA and fan fiction” discourse is flourishing. I think we’re just living in anti intellectual times.

[sedatedartist]

[sedatedartist]

Euripides (Tr. Anne Carson) / @wholeheartedsuggestions / Jenny Slate / Euripides again

[sedatedartist]

why does this whole scene look & sound like a YTP

[sedatedartist]

ET TU, BOOTAY⁉️⁉️ The RIDES 💯💯💯 👀👀👀 of March 📅📅 has CUM 💦💦💦💦👉👌 get ready to roman BUST A NUT‼️‼️ 💥💥🌰🌰🌰 Best wishes to all you SENATE SLUTS 👅🌽👅🌽 doesn’t matter if you’re a plebeian 🏚🏚🏚💸💸 or PUSSYtrician 😼😼😼🤑🤑🤑 because DADDY 👅👨👅👨 Brutus is the DICKtator 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 we all deserve 👄👄 just like juliASS 🍑😩🍑😩🍑 caesar we’re gonna get stabbed 🔪 🍌🔪🍌 2️⃣3️⃣ times in the BACK 🌽🌽🌽🍑🍑🍑 tonight. send this to 1️⃣5️⃣ of your BEST 😏😏😏 Senate Sluts 🏛🏛🏛👉👌get 5️⃣ back and you’re a BACK 🍑🍑 STABBER 🔪🌽🔪🌽🔪 get 1️⃣0️⃣ back and you’re a citizen of the roman repubLICK 👅👄👅👄👅 get 1️⃣5️⃣ back and you’re a glaDICKator 🍌🍌🍆🍆🏟🏟🏟

[sedatedartist]

[sedatedartist]

i read the phrase “heist movie set in the first century CE” on twitter and, like, please:

they’re plotting to steal a million sesterces from the imperial treasury. Vespasian is emperor. there’s at least one wrist sundial. anachronistic and silly gadgets abound. everyone goes by Marcus. there’s a high-speed chariot chase scene.

[sedatedartist]

My red flag is i could ignore you and still think about you all day