self-isinsert - Tumblr blog

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The Eleventh Sinner

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Clothes study with Silence

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FIRST POST ON TUMBLR EVER WOW !!! HELLO EVERYONE ^_^ a little bit late but happy birthday mother 3!! u are a great game that i will definitely play one day maybe 🌻💓💓

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Reblog and put in the tags your fave prev’s blorbo

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youtube made me listen to flipside extended so my hands moved

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duxia reconciling with urbosa, daruk, and mipha, is so important to me because like,,, even if it was driven by their fear they still unconsciously twisted, mentally, the behavior of these innocent people to serve their own agenda. that agenda just happened to be self-hatred and not anything more malicious.

the whole change between the pre- and post-calamity, and how things changed between botw and totk, is so interesting to me, which is why i emphasize it so much with duxia. (i will refrain from ranting about revali becoming a sequel non-entity because i could talk about it and how i'm using duxia to fix it at length and i'd rather do it in a more composed way)

the world has moved on, but it's in danger of being sent right back to where it was (or where it could have been? if zelda wasn't able to restrain the calamity). the champions never got to move on, they wouldn't have even without the blights, but the blights weren't helping. this reconciliation is almost like a proof of how things have changed, how things have improved. it's like a microcosm of the way the world has moved on. if duxia could, if they could grow from their fearful past self who refused to see that the champions could see a worth in them beyond their combat ability (who refused to see a worth in themself beyond their combat ability), if they could accept who they were without allowing it to define who they are now, then it speaks to how the world has recovered in these 100 years.

it would be the exact opposite of the situation with revali: duxia would carry the regret if they didn't get to, essentially, apologize to the rest of champions. duxia is the one carrying the guilt of "if i had been a more secure person, we actually could have had a good relationship". it speaks to their confidence in themself post-calamity that they're able to accept their past actions, but they still mourn the relationship that could have been. even though they understand that it was a product of their anxieties about the calamity, their insecurities, and their inability to effect change, it still didn't make it right, and they wish they could have been better.

making amends is all they can do, so it has to be good enough. they already know their past self was wrong, but to hear acceptance, and forgiveness, from the people they misinterpreted for their own ends still lifts a weight off their shoulders.

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kumatoraaaaaa 🐻🐯

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while listening to the ultrakill ost on the drive up i came up with an ost name for desper's boss fight in 9-2 in the "gabriel dies and desper has to defend treachery" au (need to workshop a name for that. might just call it treachery au for now)

spent so long trying to figure out what the term i was looking for actually was but i found it and i felt so proud when i did.

"an answered assumption"

because "assumption" is a term describing the ascent of a still living person into heaven and in the treachery au desper would be called by their old name by the boss hud and listed as "greater angel?" by the terminal and use powers associated with heaven. and their old name means "i have asked of god" which when combined with the name they adopted after falling being derived from "despair", i had always intended the answer they received being despair, or them being driven to despair because they received no answer for being cast out when they were just doing (what they saw as) their job. but returning to that old name in combination with assumption gives the impression that they are asking but also they are answering. and the answer is dependent on the outcome of their battle with v1.

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you know, i realized that i haven't actually talked about botw duxia and link's relationship all that much.

i think that their post-calamity relationship is really just a healthier version of the one they had pre-calamity because they're both healthier people after getting amnesia if that makes sense?

like. i've talked a lot about about duxia's growth after waking up from the shrine of resurrection. being removed from the immediate pressure of the calamity happening in the near future, and effectively wiping the slate clean, as it were, of their crushing anxiety and self-loathing, gives them a fresh start to display the willpower and selflessness they always had, but never got a chance to show. it lets them become unburdened, to some degree. they still take their responsibility very seriously, but they aren't shackled to their fears or their perceived lack of worth. that gives them the right state of mind to take what they learn about their past self in stride. it's why duxia is able to make amends with the champions for seeing them as looking down on them without falling back into the same mindset they had before. they can recognize why they felt they did without justifying it or regressing into those old behaviors; in essence, the same as revali having had his 100 years to grow as a person and self-reflect.

and link, i feel, is much the same. he put on the persona of the stoic and cold knight because of the pressure of his duty pre-calamity. he was a lot more open with duxia and zelda, but that duty, and duxia and zelda's respective personal issues, kept the three of them from having a completely open and honest relationship. they were each other's confidants, but they all still had doubts that each other couldn't help with, and that dragged down the relationship.

after waking up in the shrine, though, he doesn't have any of that pressure. he's faded into myth to the majority of the population. i feel as though he'd be significantly wilder and more reckless than duxia, but he's able to become that way because he doesn't have the pressure from his memories or from the world at large, because the world has moved on from the calamity. he, too, knows his responsibility, but he doesn't have to take everything on the path to doing it completely seriously as long as it still gets done, right? regaining his memories and contrasting his past and present self would give him a sense of perspective about the world he comes from. i think it would allow him to better value this newfound freedom while also affirming what he already knew about him being zelda's lifeline and how much she believes in and relies on him.

from the moment duxia and link reunite in the shrine of resurrection, they become each other's staunchest allies, because they only have each other. they are the only ones who understand each other's relationship with the world around them, with the time they find themself in. they navigate this unfamiliar world together, up until it becomes better to divide and conquer, by which point they've gained a sense enough of familiarity that they feel confident in doing so. and when they regain their memories, it shines a light on who they were, but it doesn't define them, rather, it gives them more information with which to decide, together, who they want to be in the future.

no more secrets. no more doubts.

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>:D

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i've actually become really attached to duxia's relationship with revali and how it changes between pre and post calamity. (tysm clare for letting me bounce my ideas off of you and with characterization!!!!)

because revali isn't an adult, he's basically a teenager. and he feels like he's stuck in the shadow of the other champions because they come from royal or otherwise important bloodlines and their abilities come naturally, whereas he's just an average person who had to work incredibly hard to become a master archer and create revali's gale. link being chosen by the master sword and thus being the one chosen to directly combat ganon is just another blow to his self-esteem, reinforcing his insecurities and perception that no matter what he does, his efforts with never be enough to keep up with inherent talent or blessing.

then comes duxia. duxia is just like him in the worst way: not a chosen, someone who had to work for their position, surrounded by people who are naturally 'special', and is also horribly insecure. they're a reflection of his real self, not the person he projects to defend his self-esteem, and he can't stand seeing that, not when he's already taking hits to his self-worth on all sides. so, since he can't get link to engage with him and take him seriously, and he doesn't know how else to cope, he lashes out at them and puts them down, making himself feel better by making them feel worse. because duxia is so focused on repressing everything that might get in the way of other people seeing them as worthy (and they believe the only thing the people around them see them as worth anything for is their combat skills that got them assigned to zelda in the first place), they just take it despite how much it aggravates their insecurities.

post-calamity, though, it's a lot different. revali has had 100 years to come to terms with his own self-worth and the way it was inextricably linked to the way he treated them. to grow as a person, essentially, and reflect on his actions, to realize that he was wrong.

so when they go up to vah medoh and defeat windblight, he's able to take the opportunity to reconcile with them. because duxia doesn't have a lot of their memories, so they don't know just how bad their relationship was, their forgiveness is given freely, and that's the most shocking thing to him. i'd like to think that even if they remembered, because of how their personality shifted after waking up at the shrine of resurrection (due to losing a lot of the pressure and anxiety they felt pre-calamity from amnesia), and his genuine admission of culpability and insecurity, they would have still done so.

there's a sort of pride in seeing duxia defeat windblight, i feel. because he always viewed them as so similar, them succeeding where he failed is like a sort of proof against his fears, that both of their hard work wasn't for nothing. and because they part on so much better terms, as genuine friends with an understanding of their shared suffering, revali is able to pass on freely and without regret after they and link defeat calamity ganon. they carry his legacy and memory with them from windblight on.

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What about 11 for Duxia? Especially BOTW / TOTK with all the outfits you can wear in those games

( @gible-love-nibles )

@gible-love-nibles

(questions from here!)

11. what kind of outfit(s) does your self insert wear?

I'll do my best with this because I'm not really a visual person orz,,,

For their WW incarnation, a lot of the adults on Outset (the men anyway) seem to wear tunics or something similar, so I imagine Duxia would wear something like that? So like, a purple tunic and pants, I guess? (Purple being the color of the Goddess Crest, a symbol that represents Hylia, and since I associate Duxia with Hylia in the same way that Link, Zelda, and Ganon are associated with Farore, Nayru, and Din, purple is kind of "their color" to me).

And you're so right about BOTW/TOTK. There is so much armor variety in those games. I've actually not even gotten to any of the Divine Beast equivalents in TOTK, whatever those are (plus given that the thing that empowers you is uh. Rauru's arm. I'm not totally sure how to include them? BOTW is easy I can just make up a second slate), so I'll just talk about BOTW!

Pre-Calamity, I assume they wore something like the Royal Guard armor set? Maybe like a unique variant to indicate their position close below, and not actually among, the Champions? (Purple is close enough to blue, right? /j) They needed to be armored, but they also needed freedom of movement to maneuver and get into position for the best line of sight possible, since, of course, they're a Hylian and can't fly. Now, for the Duxia/Zelda pre-Calamity lore I promised you: even though they weren't a Champion, I like to think Zelda considered them one, and gave them like a bracelet or something small they could hide under their armor made out of the Champion's cloth.

Post-Calamity, I imagine they wear some combination of the Stealth armor and the Hylian set; that is, when they actually get off the Great Plateau and get access to actual armor. They were never the greatest at melee combat, but they have to engage in it a lot more now, so they want to set themself up for success by not being noticed and striking when their opponents' backs are turned. It also helps them get in the best position to snipe without being noticed.

Once they and Link defeat Calamity Ganon, I like to think they get officially recognized as a Champion and have their own Champion's clothing made: a scarf in the style in of the Stealth armor (and definitely not also like Revali's).

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(questions from here!! )

2. when in canon does your self insert come in? do you have a scene in mind for your entrance?

Duxia is present from the beginning of the game in both their Wind Waker and BOTW incarnations! In Wind Waker, since they live with him, their first appearance is when Link returns home for his birthday, and they accompany him for the rest of the game. in BOTW, they're already awake in the Shrine of Resurrection when he awakes; their injuries weren't as severe as his, but not by that much, so they only woke up a few days before him.

4. would you be considered a main character, side character, villain, or something else?

Main character! The games are single player ofc, but Duxia is almost a second player kind of conceit. If it was two player, they would be the "second player", since they go on the journey with him.

15. how does your self insert play a role in the plot of the story? do they help directly defeat the villain, support the heroes, etc.?

Help directly defeat the villain. Both versions of them, WW and BOTW, accompany their Link on his journey, albeit for different reasons: the former because they don't want to lose a second sibling and the latter because they feel it's their responsibility to the kingdom (and to Zelda, once they regain their memory of being gravely injured in the Calamity alongside Link and her protecting them). I think this also indicates part of the personality differences between them, as dictated by their different circumstances.

WW Duxia is concerned with the here and now, with the things close and personal to them like their family, because they live in a world at peace, and they conceal a stubborn nature beneath a restrained mask because they want to set a good example for their younger siblings. When that peace is threatened, it pushes them to act in a way that is unnatural but natural at the same time, and if the ones under their protection are harmed (Link, since Aryll is gone they have to keep their cool while he's watching) it creates circumstances where they feel they're "allowed" to be unrestrained, and even violent if necessary.

BOTW Duxia is (was) stuck in the middle of the lead-up to a world-ending cataclysm, surrounded by people of far higher status than they who all have great expectations for them they feel they can never fulfill. Thus, they retreat inwards to bear it all, despite actually being fearful, because it's easier to let the fierce rush of their combat prowess be what people see rather than the person inside and the anxieties that accompany them. After waking up in the Shrine of Resurrection, they don't remember any of this, so some of the weight is lifted, but there's still a pressure on them that they just have to grin and bear for the sake of the world. Part of their burden is relieved, because people don't remember them and the expectations of a populace are gone, but the situation that created the expectations they held for themself, the Calamity, is still there. After it's resolved, they can begin to improve, to gain some self-confidence and stop hiding, but then TOTK happens (which I haven't thought about in regards to them because I've barely played it), and the events of the beginning of the game would probably cause them to retreat again.

16. freebie! name a fact about your self insert you want everyone to know.

I shared this in the discord, but while mulling over how to handle their disability, I settled on the idea (which I like a lot) that BOTW Duxia in particular medicates with stamina potions, since you can make those yourself in BOTW. WW doesn't have stamina, but even if it did, you need to go back to Windfall to get more potions, so it'd be inconvenient (though it could be a measure akin to an emergency inhaler, since supply is limited without going back). WW Duxia has a slightly easier time of it even without their counterpart's ease of access, though, since most of the travel is done on the open ocean by boat. BOTW Duxia has to do a lot more travel on foot/horseback.

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1, 3 and 5 for your loz s/i!

(questions from here!)

1. What are the basics of your self insert? Name, date of birth, height, etc.?

My s/i is a Hylian named Duxia! They're, uh, a pretty old concept like I said in the server, so their name is just the Latin conjugation "duxi" (a conjugation of the verb "duco" or "lead, guide, conduct, lead away") with an a on the end since I was young and didn't have any other ideas. I'm too attached to change their name though. They're in their early 20s in both games (not counting their 100 year sleep in BOTW, of course). In Wind Waker, they're Link and Aryll's adoptive older sibling, and in BOTW, they're one of Zelda's knights alongside Link. They represent the inside of the Triforce, Hylia, and their equivalent word is "resolve". They're disabled, like I am- not with any specific illness, but they get fatigued easily, can't exert themself too much. I put this here because it's something I have to say that's actually consistent between the two incarnations of them that I have currently. I don't remember ever giving them a height or a birthday. Their Wind Waker incarnation is about as tall as the Rito postman, Quill (there aren't many adults who are actually normal height to compare them to, forgive me). Since they washed ashore on Outset from a shipwreck as a young child, they don't know their birthday, but they were found in late summer, think around end of August, which they took as their birthday. Their Breath of the Wild incarnation is about the same height as Link, and I imagine their amnesia has made them forget their birthday, but they were born in the middle of spring (think April).

3. How do the other characters generally feel about your self insert?

The one thing that's consistent between both versions of them is that they and Link are very close, and he's glad to have them with him on his journey (a feeling they share).

In Wind Waker, the general sentiment is that they're keeping Link from killing himself, which is sorely needed. He doesn't view it that way, he has more self-confidence, but when he's out on the open ocean at night, he feels comforted by the fact that they're by his side; he's known them his whole life. The people of Outset are grateful that he isn't going alone. Tetra (a bit begrudgingly) sees them as a kindred spirit after witnessing their skill with the myriad of weapons (and things that aren't really weapons, but they're using as one, like the grappling hook), despite having quite the age advantage over her. Many of the characters who remember the old kingdom of Hyrule and its hero are reminded of him (and possibly their OoT incarnation) when seeing them, although, in keeping with the themes of the game, they are not the same as OoT's Duxia; this group includes the Great Deku Tree, the Sages Laruto and Fado, The King of Red Lions, and, unfortunately for them, Ganondorf. The King of Red Lions (or, his actual identity, King Daphnes Nohansen Hyrule) is particularly reminded of a better version of himself when looking at them: someone who isn't the hero, but who is taking the opportunity to act, who feels the responsibility to act, before it is too late rather than after.

In BOTW, their silent and halting demeanor, coupled with their duty they have to Zelda, makes things more difficult. Link and Zelda both view them as a close confidant and friend, with all three of them bearing the weight of something great on their shoulders. After they wake up in the Shrine of Resurrection, they and Link naturally take up this role for each other again despite not remembering their shared past, and though they spend a lot of the journey separate (after learning about the Divine Beasts), they're still incredibly close. Their shared experience waking up in a world that they have forgotten, and that has forgotten them in turn, brings them together closer than they ever were pre-Calamity. The King greatly valued their skills, enough to assign them to Zelda's personal protection duty alongside, although this might have also been because they have magic and he hoped they could help her awaken her powers. In general, although in the present people don't believe they are who they are (because 100 years), they were pretty well-respected, although they weren't a Champion, so not to the extent of Link.

The Champions like/are neutral towards them, save for Revali, since they're an archer/mage, which is stepping on his toes a bit too much for his liking. Not that he hates them or anything, it's just like the way he feels slighted by Link being the one meant to actually fight Ganon. It's a combination of factors, but mainly being reminded of himself, which aggravates his own insecurities, so he intensifies his vain front to protect himself at their expense by coming off as very combative with them. They were already self-conscious about their status within the group, but this combativeness makes them feel even worse. After they defeat Windblight Ganon, though, they reconcile, since he's had 100 years to reflect on his self-esteem and his treatment of them, and since Duxia has overcome some of their own insecurity through their amnesia.

5. does your self insert have any special powers or abilities?

WW Duxia is just a normal Hylian, so nope! Like Link isn't the reincarnation of the aspect of Courage, they aren't the reincarnation of Resolve, either, but they don't have a Triforce to reclaim to force the Gods to acknowledge them. Still, in a timeline that's missing that figure, they fill that role and are acknowledged as such (even if they don't know they're being acknowledged because the people doing so are speaking in a language they don't understand).

BOTW Duxia, though, has shadow magic! I don't really have an explanation for this one- I thought it was interesting and made them a good foil to Zelda, whose issues with unlocking her light/sealing magic were the underpinnings of the plot leading up to the Great Calamity. Blame Hylia if you must.

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razzle dazzle

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Razputin "See you in hell!" Aquato