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New Followers + Old Followers

My extended apologies to roleplay blogs following me lately.

I know you’re probably upset to see so much constant OOC here but.

I’ve been taking a break from PMMM roleplay? I’m sort of on a semi-Hiatus. However I have not given up on my muses, of course, especially not this one. Ongoing roleplays are still drafted and I still plan on continuing them. Just, not right now. 

If you still want to follow me? Cool, and thank you for your patience. I try to limit my OOC to my sideblog instead of here for that reason of your patience, tbh. So you don’t have to see this constant chatter of mine. But if you don’t want to follow until I get back on my feet, then I also understand. 

I do look forward to when I can roleplay with my new followers, and I wish I could do it soon, but it will have to wait until I can get back to roleplaying on my PMMM muses again. 

You’ve got my biggest apologies, and wishes that I soon return from my hiatus comfortably. 

For the time being you can find me on flxgrxns and rxbedo

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// Important Notice

Yes hello. As you’ve noticed, my motivation and energy for my PMMM muses is at its all time low lately. It’s temporary of course, as it always is. But until I get my head on straight, and get back into it, many of my blogs are going on a semi-hiatus/hiatus. Which is to say, some of them are a complete hiatus and others I’ll only be on extremely sporadically and rarely, only when I really feel the motivating to feel their muse. 

So, if you’re waiting on something? Please be patient. I don’t want to drop our threads, I simply can’t do them lately. But it’s nothing personal, believe me, I enjoy RPing with you if we do RP, I just can’t force myself to roeplay, when it’s supposed to be something that I’m doing for fun.

In the time being, I’m most often found either here, or on flxgrxns.

Hiatus Muses

ultrixmare

marifractis

rebellatisjustitia

lupuscantico

survivalistmiki

custosmari

canzonecorrotto

proeliatorincendia

desperatelancer

cruentislamia

hastaperfida

atrumconiecto

temporalrupture

azumx

Semi-Hiatus Muses

melodiamjustitiae

serena-decretum

theignoranthostess

illusionimaturate

fiammaresistente

exulmaris

carminesilvis

geniofolle

musicafugae

funestasomniis

Remember if a muse isn’t listed here that doesn’t guarantee I’ll be active. Actually, unlisted, and semi-hiatus muses both fall under the same description: I will not be completely active, but simply be very selective and sporadic about when I feel like I can handle being on them. Do not push me to get on them, do not force me or pressure me. 

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!!! ;;;

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lanceroftheblueflame:

Kyoko’s own eyes followed Sayaka’s after the question was asked, waiting for the hint of a response in patience until fingers would come up to pick apart the stick still hanging from her lips. She blinks and stays still without saying anything, watching the seraph’s movements carefully. When it snaps and she eats the part she took for herself, Kyoko glances aside slightly. She ends up rubbing the side of her neck again, brushing away the awkward feeling on her head.

"…" She isn’t sure what to give as a response at first, listening to what Sayaka was saying. There’s a moment taken to let it mull over, but something about why doesn’t completely get through. Maybe one day soon she would get it. All those feeling towards her were what accumulated from what the seraph remembered and thought about from there after all. Maybe she’s just being stubborn and focusing on the negative, rather than the positive. Really, she’s still surprised.

"Not even ya can point when you changed yer mind, huh? But I think I get it, even if I can’t say I understand all of it. still I think ya speak too highly of me. Kinda makes me wanna remember what happened before, though it doesn’t… sound like it’s that much different from what happened this time if yer speaking from only my reaction." Pause. "All this time we have spent alone sure seems to have changed us, though. It almost feels like maybe we needed to be apart to be able to understand each other more and get our heads out of the gutter. Somethin’ like that. I guess that’s a positive part to this situation we’re in."

She finds herself frowning the more she thinks about that instead, eyes remaining away. In a way, it was a positive thing, but it also was negative. And the negative was hard to brush off as it was. No, it was impossible considering what it meant as it was right now. It was a permanent condition after all. It was like she said, what’s done was done indeed. That could have applied to anything but that.

"…but if that’s how it really is, yknow, I wish ya wouldn’t had to die fer it to happen."

There was a strange mixture of silver lining and rain clouds in this situation, it seemed. Sayaka could never deny that. She thought about it more frequently than she would ever be comfortable with admitting, after all. 

"I...can't say I haven't thought the same, though...there's many things that I wish I hadn't had to die for to gain. This being one of the biggest ones. And yet...here we are." Sayaka sighed, shaking her head lightly, before glancing at Kyouko briefly. "It almost feels as though I owe you, everyone else even, an apology, for having to go this far to learn my lessons. But I was a brash and foolish girl. Sure, it was good that my spirit was strong, but the way that I tried to carry it was...careless. By the time my time came, and the truth came to light...it just seemed like I had been thrown into a rather terrible fate. Worst of all, it hurt everyone else in the process. Like salt rubbed on my wounds."

With a brief noise of apprehension, Sayaka follows with another sigh, and a carefully small smile. "I've gone off on a tangent again. But hear me out. It's not all bad. At least I can still do this. Show up, visit, speak with you. I'm still me, just with less of a magi's limitations, though a few more...life-related limitations to compensate. I try not to dwell too strongly on the bitter feelings of the past. Those aren't....healthy, for a girl in my position."

Though there was hypocrisy in the words of a girl who even in death, still found herself plagued by doubts, insecurities, and loneliness. She still felt those bitter feelings, she still dwelled on the past, despite her talk of moving past it and not lingering. 

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Send me "I just want to try something..." and my character will react to your character saying that and then...

#1-20

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Honestly I've already actively given up on talking to the madokami that on multiple occasion left my threads in the dust (not just on this muse either)

I should consider just giving up on talking to any goddess muse that doesn't belong to the cavelier quintet, I think

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Honestly, if you don't want to talk to me or RP with me and I seem to want to, just tell me to fuck off so I can unfollow you and stop grinding my emotions through a meat grinder trying to feel remotely significant to anyone 

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I gave myself a fucking headache

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A madokami: went inactive

another madokami: went inactive

a madokami I tried on about three occasions to talk to and start things with: literally every time, we got about 1-3 replies into a thread, and then apparently I no longer exist/am no longer important enough to consider

a kyoukami: maybe two replies in, stopped replying. Forced to assume same kind of conclusion as above

Honestly?

I'm about ready to stop trying.

Ya'll complain this fandom RPs in cliques, but you have no idea that it's repeat offenses like this that make me just want to stick inside my comfort zone, instead of fucking disappoint myself and stress myself out getting repeatedly dropped by new RP partners.

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hell I don't build up an inferiority to other RPers unless I was given a good damn reason to feel pretty damn low

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Why is it everytime I try to get my muse to talk to a goddess that isn't one of my usual RP partners

I'm only faced with frustration when for some reason they just

forget our thread or my muse exists or tried to speak to them at all

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Love was important to Sayaka. Maybe not just romantic love, as much of a pleasure as that looked to her. But she treasured the love of her friends and family just as much, if not more. She couldn't deny that. 

"I used to think it was a shameful and weak thing, knowing how strongly my well being depended on knowing those around me cared for me. When I felt as though I had lost that, that I was alone...I really did feel like I lost myself. Though...I don't believe it's so bad, to need love. Or to think about it, be curious about it. It's a stunning feeling really. It has so many different types and levels, it can create many things..."

Drifting in thought a bit, Sayaka caught herself, before sparing a more cheerful smirk at Mami. "I honestly understand now that I never did quite lose that love. I just...got ahead of myself, I made a mistake. I understand a lot of things, now. I really do feel like I've...made some progress, since my time here."

"You... seem a little down, Miki-san. Is everything alright?"

Sayaka’s hues flicker to the familiar blonde goddess nearby,  contemplating the question for a moment.

Was she? She supposed for once, she wasn’t…actually sure if everything was all right.

"Everything’s fine. I’m…thinking too much, I suppose."

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lanceroftheblueflame replied to your post:im gonna rip out one whole lung

We’re killing each other and Momo-mun in the background i s n’t it b ea utiful.

collateral damage is beautiful

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im gonna rip out one whole lung

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momo--sakura replied to your post:momo—sakura replied to your post:okay but lancer...

those arent tears on my pillow. only the lost pieces of my soul that youve t o r n out of m e

you've just had a sampling of Yuyu Brand Feels I hope you enjoyed this product and consider obtaining more in the future

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dont play this game with me it's two in the morning and I feel half awake and shippy