shadowonwater

[shadowonwater]

[Look Outside] Just a Guy at the End of the World

AO3

A fic about my oc, Guy Deere, experiencing the beginning of the apocalypse.

Words: 1,407

Told in 2nd Person

Canon typical body horror

Picture this:

You wake up, it seems like a regular day, brush your teeth, take a shower, and put on clothes. You’re about to make breakfast but something’s been bugging you all morning and it’s not the literal bugs that like to bite you at night. Because today really isn’t a regular day. It’s the first day of the apocalypse but you don’t know that yet. What you do know is that outside the closed curtains you’ve been hearing the strangest sounds and the light that’s been able to make it through is the wrong colors. You’ve known since you first opened your eyes that something was wrong. Curiosity gnaws at you. But outside you can hear something else being gnawed on. You pushed off dealing with whatever is going on outside because it’s too god damn early to deal with.

Something smacks against your windows, a wet smack. Your mind goes to birds that can’t tell the difference between air and see-through objects. The chitter chatter that is almost human but is still bird rises in volume. You don’t want to deal with this, whatever it is. There’s another smack. The window cracks. You have to deal with this. Before it gets in and makes you deal with it. You get up and you grab one of your guns before you approach the window in question. Attached above the window is a deer head.

The trophy above quietly gazes down at you with glass eyes. Your first kill. Fitting when your last name is Deere. Some of your hunting buddies would make jokes about shooting you. Other people would cringe or feel unnerved, but Guy Deere, you, have known them for so long and have a similar messed up sense of humor. You know they would never shoot you and you would never shoot them. But soon you will have to shoot one of them, but you don’t know that yet.

You throw open the windows, gun in hand, ready to shoot. You drop your gun in shock. The outside is beautiful. The outside is not right. The outside should be trees. Should be grass. Should be a few visible animals. The sky should still be early morning dark.

The sky is rainbow. The sky is a giant eye. The grass is not grass. The grass is reaching tendons. The trees are wrong. One of them was lungs. Another was a fused lump of birds. There was something between a bear and a moose eating something that was just a pile of flesh and eyes and loose bones.

You take a step back. You feel sick. You feel lightheaded. You feel something is wrong with your body. Your flesh feels loose, like it’ll slip right off your bones any minute like some ill fitted jacket. You worry that if your nausea causes you to throw up, your whole stomach will fall out of your mouth. Everything is wrong. You are wrong.

And then something that used to be a bird smacks into the window. It’s not a bird any longer but the tongue of something else. The glass cracks a little more and the trophy gets knocked off the wall.

In the future you will thank your lucky stars that the trophy fell right onto you. It’s hard to imagine what sort of grisly mess you would have become otherwise. But in that moment all you know is pain. Not just the blunt force of something knocking into your skull, but the burn of something eating through your skin.

Your screams are muffled as the deer skin covers your face. It burns and inches. You try to pull it off but that hurts even more. So you let go of the deer head and pound your fist into the ground just to do something. You curse and curse until something is wrong with your mouth. It feels as if your mouth had just been zipped up like a coat of a jacket. You continue trying to verbally express your pain but your lips won’t move. And then they do. They slowly came apart like trying to remove a sticky wad of gum from something. You can scream again but it’s so much louder because there’s nothing covering your mouth anymore. Your mouth is wrong. It’s so much longer. But it can scream all the same.

One by one you lose the ability to feel parts of your face and head until suddenly it comes back, but different. Your ears are too long and they can move. Your nose is too far away. There are two things growing out the top of your head. And lastly are your eyes. They’ve been dark this whole time, covered by the skin of the deer. It feels like your eyes are being moved, pushed, to where they don’t belong. Your eyes ache the whole time like some strained muscle. Both your eyes reach some sort of blockage but they both continue to push forward until… pop! You can see again. And down falls two dark marble eyes and clack on the wooden flooring.

You breathe and breathe out of a mouth that shouldn’t be yours. You wanted a moment to catch your bearings. But you can’t. The bird tongue is still pounding against the window. You hastily grab your gun and shoot out the window. The monster shrieks out of multiple mouths and stumbles back before trying to rush at the wall of your cabin with its whole body. You keep shooting until it stops moving. And then shoot it a few more times for good measure. 

The moose-bear looks up from what it’s eating and for a moment you worry that it’ll target you as well. But whatever passed through its mind it decided to go back to eating what it already had. But something else was hungry. A tentacle covered in a countless number of eyes reached out from beyond the dark of the forest and grabbed the newly dead monster and dragged it back inside.

You want to check the mirror but you already know what you look like. The deer head was your head now. You wouldn’t end up seeing it until a few days from now, when you tried to check the house of a friend after managing to trek through a now alien landscape for several miles. You had checked every house you came across, the houses of your neighbors as far as rural neighbors go.

Your friend was still there. But they weren’t your friend anymore. His house looked almost normal. Most of the houses were either destroyed or warped beyond recognition of what a house should look like, one was made of throbbing meat, another looked like a Picasso painting, and so on. Your house was probably already destroyed by now. You grabbed as much as you could, stashed into bags. Things needed for survival. You had to leave behind your dvd collection.

Ricardo. Jovial. Had a gambling problem. Was a bit of a sore loser. Kept you company when you needed it after your dad died from a heart attack. All of that which made Ricardo, Ricardo, was lost. Instead he was something of far too many limbs. He looked like a rubber band ball made out of arms. The arms reached out for you, clawing and scratching. And you shot at it, having to hit some core in the middle of the mess. The core was a flesh lump all the limbs were coming out of. You only realized it was him after the fact. Tattered bits of his clothing were scattered on the arms. But on the core was Ricardo’s favorite hat still perfectly intact. It was one of those silly “fish fear me” hats that Ricardo insisted on wearing despite the fact that he didn’t fish. You put the hat in your bag.

Your reflection was exactly what you thought it was. You but with a deer head. If someone didn’t look close enough they would probably mistake it for a mask. Why you? Why did you get off so lightly? When just about everything else you’ve seen has been so warped and mangled. Why do you get to almost look like yourself? Why are your thoughts still yours? Could you snap one day and think yourself a deer? Surely there must be someone else out there who hadn’t lost their mind.

So you kept going. And hoped.

[shadowonwater]

[shadowonwater]

[shadowonwater]

Deny Your (Inner) Eyes, Chapter 5: Something About Hope

AO3

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Sam had wanted to get an understanding of the layout of the first floor before going into any room, but that soon proved a dangerous endeavor. The hallways were an endless twisting loop. And something was stalking through them. Some large, moaning creature, that wasn’t very fast but it was very persistent.

Sam and Joel slipped into a random room, not far from where they had entered the first floor from. The room was mostly a void, filled with little red eyes that peered at them but did not approach. Sam wanted to get out of here, quickly. He didn’t like the way they stared at them But he also didn’t like the thing that stalked the halls.

There was a discarded letter. Sam wasn’t sure how it had wound up here. It was addressed to Jasper, Sam assumed it was the same Jasper that Aster spoke of. Edwin. Apartment 31. One of his neighbors. Sam didn’t remember much of the man who lived there. He was a hermit, aside from lending out equipment to other people in the building. He knew that the projector Vincent had was one of those.

The letter was from three months ago. Had the astronomer cultists known that The Visitor was coming for all this time? They didn’t warn anybody. If a warning had gone out about The Visitor before it came, lives could have been saved. Could it even be their fault that The Visitor came in the first place? Yes, it could have caused panic, but could that have really been worse than what actually happened? An untold amount of people mutated, most of them losing their minds. If people had been given warning they could have done something. They could have gotten black out curtains, turned their basements into bunkers, and had stocks of supplies. 

If things had gone differently Joel’s parents wouldn’t have left the baby by the window. His whole family would have been alive, non-mutated. From what little he knew of the eye-ball stomach neighbor, who’s name he could never remember, he and his partner wouldn’t have looked outside either. Vincent… would probably have still thrown a party anyway and gotten all the party goers mutated, he didn’t take stuff like this seriously. Not everybody was going to listen.

Was all of this only relevant in retrospect? They say hindsight is 20/20. Could the fear of wide-spread panic and hoarding of resources really be enough of a deterrent to not warn people? Edwin said his fear was that people would spread the image on purpose. That had some relevance. Sam had checked social media a few times, and people had tried posting photos of the outside, but it was grainy and unreadable. Was there anyway for the Astronomer’s to have known that though? They could have thought it would have spread everywhere through the internet before The Visitor arrived. Maybe the astronomer’s didn’t even think The Visitor was going to well… visit.

It's hard to not think about what could have been. There were so many variables to consider. If only people could take the warning seriously, if only people wouldn’t give into curiosity, if only people would be kind and not share images and not hoard resources, if only people had a sturdy place to hide, if only people were willing to share with those who didn’t, if only people knew exactly when to hole up. If only, if only, if only. Sam would like to think that even with the bad actors in the world, that the world can be a kind place where people care about each other. But Sam could never know what would happen if there had been a warning, just as the Sam who lived in that world could never know what would happen if there hadn’t been.

There’s no save states in real life. The world that you live in is what you get, and you have to make the most of it. The warning never came out. That’s just Sam’s reality. Just sitting here worrying about what could have been wasn’t going to help Sam now.

Was Edwin still human? He had had a glance at The Visitor. That couldn’t be good. However this letter was from so long ago and Sam would remember if he saw or heard a monster around, so maybe he’s fine? But even if he transformed he might still be sane. His door was closed. Sam made a mental note to knock on his door tomorrow.

A door slammed open.

Sam quickly got up. He was in a fighting stance, ready to take on whatever had just burst into the seemingly safe room. Joel was also at the ready. But it wasn’t a monster who threw itself through the door. It was a little girl. An unmutated little girl. With a slingshot. She was breathing heavily. She pushed her back up against the door, probably in the hope of preventing anything from following her. She looked up and saw Sam and Joel. Her eyes brightened up.

“You guys look ok! Can you kill the hallway monster and help me find my mom?”

Sam was taken aback by the sudden appearance of some random little girl. But it wasn’t like he wasn’t going to help her. “How’d you get separated from your mom?” He asked, it’s good to retrace steps when lost.

“We were looking for supplies around here and that monster started chasing us. I ran into a room (not this one) and I thought she was following me, but she wasn’t. So I’ve been running around trying to find her.”

Sam sighed. “Okay, you can stick with us for now. We’ll find her. I’m sure she can’t be too far.”

“Thank you!” The girl then ran up to the two of them and examined them both more closely. She pointed to Joel and said, “your face is weird.” She then turned to Sam and said “And wow, you're ugly. Anyway, I’m Sophie! What’re your names?”

Part of Sam wanted to kick her out of the party for a brief moment. But he let it pass. She was just a little girl. A rude little girl, but a little girl all the same. A little girl in the middle of an apocalypse who just got separated from her mother. Sam could give her allowances. But did she really have to call him ugly…

“I’m Sam. This is Joel.” Sam gestured to each of them respectively.

“So where are we going!” Sophie said.

“Can you describe the room you ran into when you were separated from her?” Sam asked.

“Yeah! It was overgrown with moss and filled with a bunch of plant monsters. So I didn’t stay very long.”

“Could you lead us back to where that area is?”

Sophie chewed her lip. “Uhhhh I’m not sure. Hallways are confusing.”

“Okay. Well we’ll look around until we find something that resembles what you saw. Can you give any more description?”

“Yeah. The hallway wall looked all messed up. I think the big rat monster, or a bunch of smaller rat monsters tore into it or something.”

Sam looked at Joel then at Sophie. “Do you two need more rest or are you ready to go back out? You only just ran in here Sophie, so if you need a moment to catch your breath-”

Sophie interrupted him, “Nah I’m good! Let’s keep looking for my mom!”. She had her hands clenched into fists. And took a determined anime-protagonist-esque stance. “Mom’s strong but she’ll need help to defeat that giant rat monster!” She looked ready to go beat up the rat monster herself.

The three of them carefully exited the passageway, Sam left the letter inside as a marker. Who knows how much of a labyrinth this place might be? So if he and the kids duck into a door and find that letter again, he’ll know where they are or if there’s some sort of time-space fuckery going on.

Sam looked left and right. He didn’t see anything, but it was dark enough that it would be hard to tell if anything was further down the hallway. If Sam tried, he wondered, would he be able to see in the dark now? Sam decided to rely on his ears. The thing’s loud moaning would alert the group if it was close.

As they walked to their right, Sam did hear something that made him pause. It was just as they were passing a door. It wasn’t the hallway monster. But it reminded Sam of a different monster he had seen earlier that day. It was faint. Sam got closer to the door and put his ear up to it. The kids stopped and looked at him confused but curious.

Crying. A baby crying. Just like Joel’s poor baby sister. She was crying, had she been in pain from the teeth? Was existence painful for her. How did she understand the situation? Such a young mind transformed into a new body before she could fully understand the one she really had. Before she could understand much of anything. Is that better or worse? To lose something before you can really experience it? Or to lose it after and know what you lost? The baby in this room, was it in pain? Was it lonely? Was it transformed? Something tugged at the insides of Sam, something like regret and redemption. Maybe he could make things right.

Sam quickly slipped into the room without warning and Joel and Sophie scrambled to follow him. The sound was louder now that they were inside. The room was dark. Sam could hear the squeaks and scurrying of rats. Sam could just barely see the glint of a silver children’s barrier from across the room.

“I thought we were looking for my mom?!” Sophie sounded a little betrayed.

Sam tried to quickly smooth things over. “There’s a baby in here. I heard it through the door. Wanted to make sure it’s ok. It might have lost or been separated from its mother too.”

“Okay. But we better go back to finding my mom after this!” Sophie pouted.

“Of course.”

Because the child barrier was surprisingly high, and was locked (what about fire safety?) Sam, Joel, and Sophie set about examining the apartment. Quickly deciding to leave one room that had a particularly large rat in it, for last.

Joel was oddly quiet as the three of them sneaked through the apartment. He didn’t even eat any of the rats this time. His mind was elsewhere. Sam had picked up a rolling pin, a chef’s knife, some food, and a pen he could give to Rafta and was debating about whether or not he should grab what looked like a weird vase (maybe he could use it as a throwable weapon?). When Joel finally spoke up.

“...Mr Sam? Is the baby in hhhh here gonna be ok?...”

Sam looked up at Joel as he held the vase. Joel was looking down and wringing his hands. Sam didn’t know the answer. There were so many things he didn’t know. He had thought that Ben would be ok, but he was wrong.

“Joel?” Sam began. “Listen. I… I don’t know. I hope so. I don't know what happened in here. I don’t know if this baby’s parents abandoned it or if they’re…” Sam looked away, “dead.” Sam looked back at Joel. “It’s alone though. And even if it’s transformed, that doesn’t mean it’s a lost cause.”

Joel looked up and pointed to himself. “Like hhhh me.”

“Yeah… like you.”

Joel did what Sam is pretty sure was his equivalent to a small smile. And went to look into the bathroom. Sam didn’t stop him because when they were quickly scouting things out, there was nothing dangerous in there.

Sam went back to examining the vase. As his fingers felt the underside he felt a piece of paper stuck to the bottom. He carefully held the vase upside down, careful not to drop it. It said “grandma’s urn” written in careful sharpie on a yellowed piece of paper affected with clear scotch tape. It wasn’t a vase.

Sam held the urn upright and stared at it. Who was she, he wondered. Was she the baby’s grandmother? Or the grandmother of one of its parents? What future would this mystery woman have foreseen for the baby? Or did she die before she knew of it? She still likely dreamed of her descendants as a theoretical concept. 

Both of Sam’s grandmothers died when he was young. Nothing spectacular, just old age. Neither of them opted for cremation. He was too young to have remembered one of them at all. But the other he had a few memories of. He could remember the funeral, first funeral he’d even been to, at the ripe old age of four.

So many people must have lost family in these past two days. Joel’s family is gone. Sophie got separated from her mother and who knows if they’ll find her alive. Sam has no clue on the status of his parents or sister. His sister might be ok, she also lived in an apartment building. She’d have places to go to that weren’t outside. His sister’s kids were with her, he hoped. But his parents lived in the suburbs. He couldn’t hope to believe that they were still human at this point. But even if they were transformed, maybe they were still themselves? He could take his own word of advice for Joel.

It felt inappropriate to take the urn of someone he didn’t know. But the alternative was to leave it here in this dark and dusty room. To be abandoned. With all the inhabitants either gone or equally dead. Maybe he could at least find a nicer place to put it. Sam took the urn.

At the same time Joel walked out of the bathroom and handed Sam a tonic, some toothpaste, and a slightly crumpled note. “I found these in the hhhh bathroom.”

The note was short. Talking about something called “planet discs”. Apparently it was something astronomers were using? And they were being used to lock doors? Another reason to consider the astronomers kind of sketchy.

With nowhere else to look they turned to the final room. Sophie had been impatiently waiting by it. She had been convinced from the start that the key must be in the “boss’s room”. Well there was nowhere else it could be unless the key had been taken out of the apartment. Sam wondered what he would do if they couldn’t find the key at all. Well, he’d try everything in his power to get past the barrier. Even that.

As a group they quickly dispatched the rats. The larger rat was hardly a boss at all, Sophie seemed almost disappointed. The trenchcoat in the room was quickly given to Sophie (for her protection). Sam quickly grabbed the whole entire stack of magazines, not checking the contents, he could go over them at home and see if any of them were interesting.

Joel beat Sam to the punch with the key sitting on the table. He grabbed it and ran to the barrier, Sam and Sophie followed right at his heels. Joel unlocked the barrier and they all carefully filed through, weary of any monsters in the room. The crying was louder without walls to block off the sound. Sam could see a moving lump underneath the blankets in the crib.

Sophie started grabbing stuff in the room while Sam approached the crib. What would be underneath the blankets? There was a soft chime from a music box that was almost inaudible over the babies cries. It became silent as Sophie grabbed it and shut it, adding it to their shared loot.

Sam reached under the blankets and pulled it up into sight. Many would recoil from the sight, but Sam had been expecting this. Maybe not this exactly, some sort of rat-baby-thing, but he expected it to be transformed. It was… sort of cute, in a ugly monstrous way.

Both Joel and Sophie got on their tip-toes, trying to see what the baby looked like. So Sam lowered his arms so they could see. Joel smiled. Sophie, on the other hand, scrunched her nose.

“It’s really dirty and smelly.” Sophie said.

“Yeah…” Sam trailed off as he looked at it. It had the grime of something that had been living in the garbage for far longer than two days. Sam questioned if it had actually been a rat first before mutating. But the crib… this room must have been used by a baby at some point. The drawings that had been on the wall (one of the items Sophie had taken) must have been drawn by human hand. Was it a mutated baby? Or a mutated rat?

Sam put the rat baby back in its crib while he contemplated. The rat baby didn’t like that. It screeched and awkwardly pushed itself over the side of the crib, falling on the floor. The rat baby quickly recovered, and grabbed onto the bottom of Sam’s leg. It held on tightly and pushed its face into Sam.

Whatever it was, it wanted to be with him. So he carefully reached down and scooped it up and put it in his bag. Its little head poked out from the top. Sophie exclaimed that it was going to make all of Sam’s stuff dirty. It might. It probably would. He would clean it later.

Sam, if it weren’t for Sophie, would have decided to start heading home by now. He didn’t feel sleepy yet, but he was sure it had to be at least the evening by now. They had more time though. And they needed to find wherever Sophie’s mom had gotten too.

Sam stuck his head into the hallway, searching for danger, when he didn’t find any he stepped out. Joel and Sophie followed behind him, looking around wearily as if the monster could appear from thin air.

They headed forward down the hall, coming to an intersection. The exit sign hung on the wall, pointing in the opposite direction they came from. The ground went down the left hallway. Soon finding another intersection, with another exit sign on the wall. Halfway between these intersections was a door that wouldn’t open. They kept traveling forward, past another intersection. There at this new intersection, one of the hallways looked torn up, just as Sophie had described.

“There it is!” Sophie said, running forward. But she came to a sliding stop as they all heard the unmistakable groaning of the hallway beast. Sam turned his head this way and that, trying to find the source of where it was coming from. But when it was this close it sounded like it was coming from everywhere.

Sophie shrieked and started running in the opposite direction. Sam could just barely see a giant figure through the dark. Sam and Joel followed her, coming into a hallway of what had to be almost all the doors the first floor had. There was maybe 20 of them? Sam didn’t exactly have the time to count.

Sophie was running back and forth in the hallway, tugging on the door handles. Sam and Joel joined her by running to doors she hadn’t tried yet. Joel yelled to get their attention as he found an open door. Sophie and Sam rushed over and they all piled in, just as the hallway monster was reaching them.

One could refer to this situation as ‘out of the frying pan and into the fire’. Because looking at them all, was the largest eyeball Sam had seen in his life. And unfortunately in the past two days, Sam has seen a lot of eyeballs that were bigger than they should be. But this one, that seemed to float above an abyss that took up most of the room, took the cake and ate it too.

Sam saw out of the corner of his eye as Sophie ran to grab something on the ground. He didn’t look away though, transfixed in horror at the size of the thing he was looking at. And transfixed by the fact it was looking at him. Something was building in Sam’s head. It hurt. His head hurt. His head felt like it would split open. A hand grabbed Sam’s and tugged at him. He didn’t stop looking though. Sam was looking at it more than he should have been able too. Could this eyeball have come from something like him something on a lower floor?

Two hands were grabbing his arm and yanked him back. Sam tumbled into the empty hallway. No moaning or monster in sight or sound. He had fallen on top of the kids, so he quickly rolled himself off them. His head still hurt, but his headache was rapidly diminishing. He took deep breaths. He could see Joel and Sophie getting up. They also clutched at their heads in pain. Sam hoped that was from whatever was going on in that room, and not because their heads hit the floor when he fell on them.

“Why were you just-” Sophie started to say as she looked up at Sam. She then stared at him in confused shock. And started feeling her face in a panic. her voice squeaked “Are-are there eyeballs on my face too?!”

Joel looked between her and Sam. And said “Don’t worry, hhhh Sophie. Sam just grows eyeballs sometimes, they’ll hhhh go away. There aren’t any extra eyes on you.”

Sophie stopped feeling her face and went back to staring at Sam. There was a look on her face, somewhere between wonder and worry. “So you're one of the nice monsters then?”

“I-” I’m not a monster. He almost said. Which wasn’t true. His brain scrambled for something to say. Something that was not a lie but wasn’t an admission. “I won’t hurt you.”

Sophie laughed, “Of course you wouldn’t hurt me! You’re a softie!”

They might have stayed longer in the hallway, but hearing the moans of the hallway monster in the distance was the perfect reminder that they had a mission. Sophie brought them to the plant room. It wasn’t hard to miss, with grass growing through the floorboards in front of it.

Sophie pointed to Sam’s face. “Joel’s right! The eyes are gone!” She grinned. “Do you do that on purpose? Like can you control them? Can you see out of them? How many are there?”

Sam really didn’t like this line of questioning. So he was going to not say anything. “So this is the room you ran into when you got separated from your mom? When you saw her running, was she headed towards the hallway of doors?”

Sophie squinted at him but answered the question. “Yeah this is the room. Yeah she was running towards the doors.”

Sam nodded. “Okay, we’ll head out back in that direction in a moment. If you don’t mind Sophie, I'd like to quickly examine this room to find anything to grab.”

Sophie made a face. She probably didn’t appreciate having to wait longer but Sam and Joel came here for supplies, even if they were helping her they still needed to help themselves. After a moment though a new look spread across her face. A mischievous smile. “You can look in this room, but only if you answer one of my questions. Otherwise I’ll scream and attract all the monsters.”

God. Why did kids have to be like this? Sam sighed and ran his hand down his face. “Okay. One question. And I can veto at least two times.”

“No. No veto. Just answer.”

“One veto.”

“No vetoes.”

“One veto.”

Sophie opened her mouth wide, the harsh high-pitched scream just beginning to exit her lips.

“OKAY NO VETOES!”

Sophie closed her mouth and smiled. But just as she was about to ask him something Joel yelled to get their attention. “The plants!”

Sam was at the ready. Cleaver in hand. There were two plant things making their ways towards the party, attracted either by Sophie's scream or Sam's yell. They moved like snakes, vines serpentining across the floor. One was growing around a human skull, the other around part of a rib cage, they were both collections of flowers. The three of them fought the plants off, leaving shreds of plants on the floor. 

Joel ate one. Which Sam supposed was good. Something about how kids need to eat their vegetables. Sophie exclaimed, in regards to Joel, “Ewwww… what did it taste like?”

Joel shrugged, “Like plant.”

Sam looked around the room. To his dismay, there was nothing in it, just grass and vines and human skulls littering the floor and a poster of a sunset on the wall. There were three doors. Maybe one of them would have something useful behind it.

Sophie stopped him before he went through one. “I haven’t asked my question yet! And we agreed to only one room!”

“There wasn’t anything in here. I need to check another room.”

“Then I get another question. And I get to ask both of them now.”

“...okay.” 

She mulled it over. Sam dreaded what she would ask. She settled on something. “How come you look human?”

Because he is human. Because he wants to be human. “I don't know.”

“Not a good answer.” Sophie pouted. “If you answer like that, it doesn't count.”

“Because…” Sam trailed off, he looked away from Sophie, towards the sunset poster. “I want to be… human, I mean.”

“So could you look different if you tried to? Can you shapeshift?!” Sophie was intrigued and excited.

“Is that your second question?”

A look of realization on Sophie’s face. “No uh…” She was back to mulling things over. “How many eyes do you have?”

“I genuinely have no clue.” Sam was completely telling the truth. He really hasn’t had time to count them. And he doesn’t want to transform into that monster form if he can help it.

“Then let me count them!”

“We don’t have time for that right now.”

“I mean after we find my mom!”

“No promises.” Sam pushed past her into the door behind her.

After beating up some more plant monsters, Sam found headphones, some old CDs and got into the safe for a stamp collection and 100 bucks. They used a key that Sophie had found in the room with the giant eyeball. Sam was glad she didn’t make him answer another question to get to use it, he just had to say “pretty please with a cherry on top”. Although he still found himself disappointed with the things they had found even if Joel looked cute with the headphones on.

Sophie must have noticed his expression. “You know… we are right next to more rooms… I'll let you go inside one if you let me ask another question.”

As much as Sam wanted to look into the other rooms he was done with being asked questions. “No. We really should be getting back to looking for your mom.”

But as Sam turned to head back, Sophie stopped him. It seemed that in this moment, Sophie’s burning desire to know more about monster Sam and get under his skin was enough to make her drop her quest. “How about you can explore the rest of the apartment, all of it, but I get one more question.”

Sam didn’t want to keep talking about it but it was a good offer. “Alright, fine. One more question. I get to explore the rest of the apartment.”

Sophie already seemed to have the next question lined up because she came right out with it. “What are you gonna name the rat baby?”

The question caught Sam off guard, he was expecting another question about the eyeball stuff. But it was a much more welcome question. He hadn’t been thinking about it to be honest. He probably would have come up with something once he was back in his apartment and didn’t have to keep looking behind his shoulder.

He reached behind him and pulled out the rat thing and looked into its eyes. It made small squeaks as it looked back at him. How do people even name kids anyway? So Sam blurted out the first name that came to mind, “Ratticus! It’s like Atticus but Rat!”

Sophie made a face. “That’s a really dumb name!”

Sam deflated a bit. Sophie had a point. It was definitely more of a dog name than a kid name. He raked his mind to try to come up with something a little more meaningful.

“How about… Hope.” Sam said.

Sophie smiled “Yeah that’s way better!”

Joel, who had been keeping an eyes out for more monsters, said “It’s a nice hhhh name, Mr Sam”

The newly named Hope squeaked in agreement.

Plus here's some more art of Inner Eyes Sam:

[shadowonwater]

evil morton back again

[shadowonwater]

Shadow buying pizza from Pizza Delivery Guy

[shadowonwater]

[shadowonwater]

Inner Eyes Sam, he's colored!

He's a magenta sort of color

and of course his heterochromia carries into his monster form

[shadowonwater]

[shadowonwater]

Look Outside Magma doodles/drawings

[shadowonwater]

More fan art for @shadowonwater's fic Deny Your (Inner) Eyes, these are definitely a lot more concept-y than the last one

[shadowonwater]

[shadowonwater]

Deny Your (Inner) Eyes, Chapter 4: Strange Encounters

AO3

First | Previous | Next

5k words, my longest chapter yet

Warning: Panic Attack, disassociation

Sam brought Joel back to his apartment and told the little guy to feel free to play any of the games he had. Meanwhile Sam would clean himself off in the shower and get on some new clothes. Showers are a good place to think about things. Unfortunate because Sam would rather not think about anything right now. And in the effort to think about not thinking things, of course he thought about the things he didn’t want to think about.

What happened back there with the baby? This is the 2nd time he’s gotten into a physical altercation with a large monster and he can barely remember what happened. He remembers what happened. What did he do to her? He bit her, he tore off chunks of flesh and ate them. Why would he DO that? He thinks he might have been a bit hungry? But he already ate some food for breakfast… he was just suddenly more hungry than before.

When it comes down to it. Sam ate someone. A baby. A monster baby, but still a baby. And the rest of its family is dead except for Joel. Did Joel understand what happened? What Sam did. He remembers Joel was scared. Did he scare Joel? Why would Joel go with him? When he went back to Joel, his mind was in a haze. Was there something from then that he didn’t remember? Of course there was.

Why did Sam take him in? Joel was alone, yes, but… Sam didn’t know how to take care of a kid. It seemed like a good idea at the time. But now he, an unemployed gamer, had to be in charge of not just himself but a whole other human person. Not to mention all the supernatural bullshit going. The kid’s whole face was a mouth for Pete’s sake! How was that going to affect that poor kid’s life? And what about Sam himself? What was happening to him? What has he become? Is Joel in danger around him?

Snap out of it Sam. He told himself. Just take your shower. Make sure the kid isn’t hungry. Then get to the 1st Floor and go looking for more supplies.

After Sam finished his showering and drying off, and putting on new clothing, he stepped out of the bathroom. Just as he expected, the kid was sitting on the couch playing a game. But Sam didn’t recognize the music. He only had three games left on hand and the sound effects and music tracks of those three were well familiar to him at this point. What game was this? And where did Joel get it?

As Sam turned the corner, trying to get a look at the screen, a shrill scream came from the console as a somewhat spooky ghost took up most of the screen. Sam’s heart leapt up into his throat for a moment. Before he calmed down, realizing there was no real threat. He remembered this game from when he was a kid, Screamatorium. Where did Joel find it?

The Joel in question noticed Sam coming up from behind. “Oh Mr Sam, sorry the ghosts hhhhh startled you. I can turn the volume down.”

What a sweet kid. “No, I'm okay. I was just wondering where you found that old game. I know I didn’t leave it on my game shelf.”

Joel pointed to the shelf by Sam’s bedroom door. “I found it hhhh over there.”

Oh right. Sam could vaguely recall stuffing it somewhere back there a long time ago.

“Mr Sam? Are you sure you’re hhhh ok? You have extra eyes again.”

What. “What.” Sam said out loud, lamely.

“Oh, they just went away. But you had them after hhhh something scary happened to you, right? That’s why you were covered in blood.”

“I… I don’t have any extra eyes, Joel.”

“Well, not right now. But I hhhh saw them earlier.”

“Are you sure you saw something? How good is your vision, anyway? What with having your eyes in your mouth?”

“I can’t see to the hhhh side very well. But I can see anything that’s right in front of me.”

“Ok uh…” Sam didn’t have a response to that. And he didn’t want to fight with Joel on the eyes thing. So he decided he’ll just drop the subject. “Listen, I gotta head out… are you hungry or anything? I can make you some food real quick before I leave.”

Joel seemed startled and upset. Sam wasn’t sure how he read upset in Joel’s expression but it was definitely there. “No! I want to come with you Mr Sam!” Joel ran up to Sam and grabbed the side of his pants. “Don’t worry I can fight!”

Kids aren’t supposed to fight. Sam thought. But he sighed. Joel probably didn’t want to be alone on the second day of the apocalypse in a stranger’s apartment. And he wouldn’t want to be alone after suddenly losing his whole family. “Yeah okay buddy, stick close to me though. And again, are you hungry?”

“Uhh, a little.”

“Okay then let’s-”

There was knocking at the door.

Sam stopped and gestured for Joel to step back. Sam looked through the peephole and saw… a pizza delivery guy? He didn’t order anything. Did the guy go to the wrong apartment? Actually that was the least of Sam’s worries about this. Where did that guy come from? Mutt’s didn’t do delivery. So the guy should have come from outside the building, but he looked perfectly normal. And if he happened to get inside right before The Visitor appeared, wouldn’t he have already completed his delivery by now?

“Uhh, hello?” Sam said.

“I think I’m at the right place…” The delivery guy muttered to himself. “Hey uh, I got a Large Chicken Pizza. You ordered that right?”

No Sam did not order that, or anything. He almost told the guy he’s got the wrong place but Joel lit up when he overheard the guy had pizza. So Sam opened the door and gave the man money in exchange. Gave him a tip too, because Sam has done pizza delivery before, he knows the struggle. He watched the delivery guy walk off towards the wall and then… walk through it?

Sam looked at the pizza in his hands skeptically. Joel grabbed a slice and ate it in one whole bite, going “Yum!” Sam then shrugged and ate his slice. It was good and fresh. Hopefully his head doesn’t explode or something. What was with that guy? Is he a pizza ghost or something?

Joel and Sam left after eating a few slices. Looking closer at where the delivery guy disappeared, Sam could see a grease stain on the wall in the same general shape as the delivery guy. Pizza ghost, for sure.

The two of them headed down the stairwell, only to be stopped by yet another strange… person? It was between the flights of stairs that lead from the 3rd floor to the 2nd. Some creature in a black cloak that looked a bit like a cocoon. It wore a white mask.

Sam pushed Joel behind him, who knows how dangerous it might be. The being glided up to him, but kept a reasonable distance. It just stood there and stared at him with a blank expression. Hesitantly, Sam said “Are you… friendly?”

The shadowy being perked up, and nodded the mask up and down. Sam was still hesitant, but it wasn’t making any threatening moves. It still stood there though, staring. Sam had the feeling it wanted something. “Do you need help with something?”

The shadow being startled, did it not expect him to ask something like that? But it then slowly nodded its head again.

“Are you injured?” Sam asked. It shook its head no. “Are you lost?” No. “Are you looking for someone?” No. “Are you hungry?” The Shadow Being vigorously nodded its head.

Joel popped out from behind Sam. “Hey! Do you hhhh like pizza? We have some!” Sam would have preferred if Joel stayed behind him, he still didn’t know what to make of The Shadow Being. The being nodded its head yes.

So Sam gave it a slice, which it ate, before gliding back into the shadows, completely disappearing. It was like it was never there in the first place. Sam had a feeling he would see it again. Wild animals will keep coming back for food, why wouldn’t whatever-this-thing-is. Sam just hoped that it would never see either him or Joel as food by association.

“Hey! Hey Mr Sam! Hhhhh look!” Joel, pulled Sam over to a note taped up to the wall. It was an advertisement for a shop someone had created. Not even the apocalypse can stop capitalism, apparently. “Do you think they’re selling anything, hhhh cool?”

Well the plan was to look for supplies. So might as well look. Eugene’s shop it is. And if he was lucky he could get anything he needed there and not have to worry about endangering himself, and even more importantly, endangering Joel. “Yeah okay,” Sam said. “Let’s go visit this Eugene guy.”

It was right next to where the key was. As they walked up, Joel was none-the-wiser to why Sam was on edge. Sam could see the hole of where the previously bordered up door was. The one that had held a monster. He kept waiting for the hallway to start expanding again, and for that monster to rear their ugly face. He was only somewhat worried about himself, he could beat it, he already has. But what about Joel?

They walked in and were greeted by a shockingly normal looking man. He had a gun and a few scars on his face, but in the grand scheme of things that was nothing. In fact he was the first normal person, besides Sam himself of course, that he had seen since this whole thing started. Sam didn’t count Aster, because what normal person goes around where cult-robes? There was a reason Sam wasn’t particularly interested in whatever bizarre ritual he and his friends were up to.

The store had a few things out, but also a lot of still-filled boxes. Eugene hadn’t had the chance to really get everything set out yet. Sam and Joel walked around, eyes scanning the store. There was some good stuff here. Soap, toothpaste, bullets, medical supplies, various different weapons. But there wasn’t food. There were a few drinks, sure, but not any food proper. Which means that he and Joel would have to go downstairs after all.

Sam had a decent amount of money on hand from pilfering loose cash from apartments, including even getting into one of his neighbor’s safes. But he knew he wouldn’t be able to buy everything. So what, out of these items, would be the most useful to them? Sam went through his bag checking what items he already had.

They had a few different weapons already, so despite Eugene already having some good looking ones, Sam figured he and Joel would be good on that front for now. Sam had some medical supplies but with all the monster fighting they would probably need more. In particular they only had one tonic left. But… did Sam really need to be so worried about injuries anymore? Joel might need more. Speaking of Joel… Sam definitely needed more toothpaste.

Sam wasn’t exactly a fan of the prices, but he wasn’t surprised, it was the apocalypse after all. Eugene probably put himself in a lot of danger to get these items. He bought 4 tubes of toothpaste and 3 Tonics. It was easy to haggle some of the price by saying it was for the kid. It seems Eugene had a soft spot.

As Sam and Joel walked back into the hallway, heading towards Lyle’s room, Sam could feel someone watching him. He wasn’t sure how to put it into word’s the sureness he felt of this fact. He almost turned around, but he didn't need to. He has eyes on the back of his head. He focused on what was going on behind him. There was someone watching from the darkness behind the door frame across from Eugene’s room. Cat-like eyes shined in the darkness. Sam felt the creeping dread of prey being stalked by a predator. 

Sam stood stalk still. Should he confront it? That might risk putting Joel in danger. Should they just walk away as if nothing was wrong? Not let it know he was on to it? They could make a break for it, but that usually triggers hunting instincts in animals. Staying so still in itself might clue it in to him.

“Uh, Mr Sam? Why did we stop?” Joel asked before turning his mouth-head to look up at Sam’s face. Joel then looked startled and then paused before stage-whispering, “There’s hhhh something dangerous, isn’t there?”

Damn, is Sam that easy to read? What clued the kid? He realized that Joel was looking more up than he usually does when talking to him. It reminded him of… of the blood, all over his body yet the kid had looked up, up at his eyes, up above his eyes, to his other eyes. The eyes that shouldn’t be there. Because Sam was human and humans only had two eyes. But he wasn’t human anymore. Oh god. And he ate a baby or part of a baby. And he’s a monster. What’s he going to do? He ate Joel’s baby sister. He’s a MONSTER!

“MR SAM!” Joel yelled.

They were somewhere else now. Some apartment or other. There was a concerned woman wearing a trench coat. Sam could vaguely recall being dragged here by Joel. When something came over him. He thinks he has more legs than normal, he’s going to ignore that.

“Joel?” Sam asked, quietly still in half a daze. “Where are we?”

“You were hhhh acting really hhhh weird, Mr Sam!” Joel sounded like he was going to cry. Can Joel still cry? “I-I didn’t know hhhh what to do! And you really hhhh scared! You had hhhh a bunch of hhhh e-eyes, Mr Sam!”

“Umm…” said the trenchcoat woman. “I heard you two stumbling in the hallway. You both seemed like you were running from something…” The woman’s eyes turned to the door, like she was expecting something to come knocking or crashing in. “So I asked your son if you two needed to hide from something.”

Sam spluttered, “Um-I-Uh-It-Uh…” The woman’s assumption crashed into Sam just enough to knock him back into attention. Sam cleared his throat. “He’s uh… not my son. It’s complicated.”

“Oh.” Said the trenchcoat woman then after an awkward pause she continued. “Well, I’m Jeanne. You are?”

Joel had started calming down after Sam had snapped out of whatever stupor he was in and quickly answered the trenchcoat women. “Hi Ms Jeanne. I’m hhhh Joel, and this is Mr Sam.” Joel pointed to himself then Sam as he said their names.

Sam butted in, “Listen Jeanne, we’re so sorry for crashing into your place like this. We were about to head onto the first floor but… there was something watching us. We’ll get out of your hair soon. I just… need a moment first.” Sam wanted to calm down. He needed (and wanted) only two eyes and two legs.

“It’s no problem.” said Jeanne. “But um… since you’re going down to the first floor already, could you do me a favor? I left a full laundry load in the laundromat on the ground floor. I’d get it myself but… I’m sick. Although… you two both seem sick as well? It looks like there might be something going around…” Jeanne trailed off.

In the darkness of the apartment, Sam hadn’t looked at the woman very closely. Has she changed too? He squinted through the darkness. And suddenly he could see clear as day. His eyes adjusted to the darkness of course, nothing else. It was a bit hard to see, but under her trenchcoat were additional eyes peeking out. Sam felt like he could relate.

“Are you sure you’re just sick?” Sam asked.

The trenchcoat woman seemed hesitant to answer. “We’re all just sick. That’s it. It’ll pass… like a cold.”

Sam decided not to press further. Who was he to judge?

“Well.” Sam said, “I’ll be happy to grab your laundry for you.”

“Thank you.” The woman said.

Joel and Sam left a bit after that. Of course Joel asked the woman if he could have the muffin she had out. And the kind woman that she was, couldn’t say no to an enthusiastic eight year old. Just before they stepped through the door, she rushed over with something in her hands. She had a cleaver. She handed it to Sam, told him that he could use it. He couldn’t say no to such a useful weapon, especially when they didn’t buy any of Eugene’s weapons.

Sam’s eyes scanned the hallway. Just two eyes thankfully. But he no longer saw nor felt those bestial eyes he had earlier. He and Joel were in the clear. They swiftly crossed the few feet it took them to get to apartment 21 and entered.

There was the muffled sound of something being knocked over in another room, followed by an equally muffled curse. Sam wondered how familiar Joel was with cursing. Was he supposed to cover Joel’s ears? Parents did that in media a lot. Sam’s parents never really did that though. Eh, whatever, it’s the apocalypse, kid can handle a few swears.

A door opened up to the right and Lyle maneuvered himself through the doorway. The room behind him was lit by a red light and Sam could see photos hanging from strings inside. He’d never seen a dark room in person before, it’s old school, but kind of cool. He wondered if Lyle would let him see it sometime, not today though, they had plans.

“Ugh, so who is it this time…” Lyle grumpily muttered before he turned his head and saw Sam. “Sam! You’re back!” Lyle skittered over. Lyle’s eyes caught Joel and he said to Sam “Who’s this you have with you?”

Sam gestured towards the kid by his side. “This is Joel. He’s… gonna be staying with me for a while.” Sam then nodded towards the darkroom, “That’s a darkroom, right?”

Lyle was strangely nervous as Sam looked at the darkroom. He moved his body to block Sam’s eyesight. “Ah yes, it’s a darkroom. But you can’t go in! I’m working on a big project right now and i-it’s an ABSOLUTE mess!”

“Okay…” Sam started. “Um, what were you saying earlier? About…” Sam paused before mimicking Lyle’s voice surprisingly accurately. “So who is it this time?” Before returning to his usual voice. “Did someone else come through here?”

Lyle stared open mouthed at Sam. Joel also was looking at him, impressed. Joel said, “Wow! You sounded exactly hhhh like Lyle! How did you do hhhh that Mr Sam!? Can you teach me?” Was it really that impressive? He just… decided to sound like Lyle, that was it. But Sam had never been that good at mimicking sounds before.

Lyle shook himself before saying, “Y-You really sound just like me! And uh… to answer your question… because the door to the first floor is locked and the elevator isn’t working, people keep going through my room to get to the first floor. It’s kind of annoying.” Lyle leaned towards Sam before hastily adding “But not you though! I don’t mind you coming through!”

“Why… don’t you mind me?”

Lyle fiddled with his many legs, he blushed and wouldn’t look directly at Sam. “I-I get ignored a lot, or treated like a weirdo. Cause I’m nerdy and w-weird. But you were nice to me w-when we were co-workers. I d-don’t know why they would fire you… you,” Lyle looked towards Joel before he looked right at Sam, “You’re kind. You’re a good person.”

Sam didn’t feel like a good person. He still didn’t remember Lyle very well. To Sam, he was just a co-worker, he was just being polite. Sam wasn’t a social person. He kept to himself. He played video games. He kept showing up late to work because his shift was too damn early. He was polite to everybody, even when he was in a bad mood. He had been fired when the convenience store was decided to be no longer 24/7. Sam was an average person. Not good, not particularly bad, he was just average. He was a guy in the background.

At least that before The Visitor. Now Sam isn’t sure what he is. He thinks he might be a bad person though. He took Joel in, sure, but only after he killed Joel’s whole family. He’s been looting people’s homes. And he… ate a baby beat up a baby.

“Uh. Thank you?” Sam simply said, in response to Lyle. “We’re going to the first floor for supplies… do you have anything to trade?”

Lyle looked in thought. “I mostly just have a lot of photo paper. Um… I also have some crossword puzzles… a bottle of Purocare… and a Mazes and Wizards set!”

The Purocare could be useful. Crossword Puzzles and Mazes and Wizards could pass the time. Sam wasn’t sure what he'd do with photo paper though. “Well how much do you want for any of those things? Or I could trade you something?”

As Sam reached for his bag to show Lyle what he had, Lyle interrupted him. “You-you don’t need to do all that… I can just give it to you for free!”

Sam balked at that. All of that… for free? “Surely I can give you something in exchange?” This felt like stealing. Lyle was a nice monster. Sam didn’t want to steal from a nice monster.

“Well uh…” Lyle began timidly, he seemed to be debating with himself. “You could… give me a kiss.”

A kiss? Lyle was blushing and looking away from Sam’s face, not wanting to see his reaction. Was… Lyle in love with him? Is that why Lyle was so convinced he was a good person? But still, just one kiss in exchange for all of that was a good deal. Could Sam really be okay with kissing a monster? He was living with a child monster now. Sam was a monster. And Sam didn’t think Lyle was going to kill him. Fuck it. Sam was going to kiss a monster.

“Sure”

“H-ha ha! Got you- Wait you said yes?”

Sam nodded, “Yeah I’ll kiss you.”

One of Lyle’s main hands rose up to cover Lyle’s mouth. There was a quiet and rapid “omg omg omg omg omg!” Before Lyle’s hand returned to holding on to his cloak. Most of Lyle’s feet were doing a jittered taping on the ground. “Okay okay… uh, c-close your eyes please.”

Joel looked back and forth between them, “Should I leave?”

“No Joel, this will be quick.” Sam wasn’t big on closing his eyes with a monster so close to him. But he trusted Lyle. Plus, Sam was sure he could defend himself if Lyle tried to betray his trust. So he closed his eyes and puckered up. Sam didn’t have much experience kissing, he hoped Lyle wouldn’t mind.

In the darkness of closed eyes, Sam could hear Lyle scuttle closer to him until he was right in front of him. He could feel Lyle’s cloak brushing up against him. There was a sound like a camera being adjusted. And his lips met something. There was no skin, no teeth, no mouth at all. It was rounded, smooth, and hard. It felt like glass. And it was extremely warm. Sam was worried he might burn his lips. He kissed it, and when he pulled back the suction created a cartoonish lip smack. There was a flash of dazzlingly bright light that Sam could still see through his closed eyelids, along with the snap of a camera going off. He almost opened his eyes.

“There, you can look now~” Lyle said. “Sorry about the photograph, it goes off sometimes when I’m excited~”

Sam’s eyes, open again, could see a bright red blush on Lyle, he looked giddy. “So about those items…”

“Oh yes~” Lyle said. “I’ll grab the photo paper from my dark room. Mazes and Wizards is on the table. The crosswords are on the coffee table in front of the TV. And the Purocare is on the counter by that door over there.” Lyle pointed to the door with strange tendril-like fleshy growths.

So Sam grabbed the items in question and got the photo paper from Lyle momentarily afterward. As he and Joel headed towards the bathroom, which apparently had the entrance to the first floor, Lyle warned them that he thinks there was something in there that had crawled up from the first floor. The warning was warranted as Sam and Joel got into a fight with some sort of monster with eyeballs growing on its head like a tumor.

As they were fighting it, Sam could swear that he heard Lyle talking to somebody in the other room. At first he thought maybe Lyle was talking to himself until he heard another voice, a giggle, the voice sounded feminine. He was expecting some other person to show up in the unusually elongated bathroom, but no one else came in. Maybe Lyle was talking to himself, and just had a feminine sounding giggle? Sam couldn’t shake the feeling though that something was looking at him. He quickly ushered Joel and himself through the secret entrance as soon as they defeated the monster.

They found themselves in a small room, swarming with rodents. A leaky pipe slowly and continuously dripped blood at the side of the room. As they tried to walk through the room, most of the rodents ran away but a couple of braver ones ran right at them. Turns out they weren’t entirely normal rats. Sam easily cut one in half with his cleaver, as he turned to help Joel, he saw the kid… swallow it whole.

He knew Joel wasn’t exactly human anymore. But as he watched Joel’s jaws closing in on the rat, chewing it, hearing the crunch of tiny bones and the squish of meat, he felt like he was watching a stranger. That kid, Joel, was a sweet kid. But he also ate a random rat off the floor like some wild animal. What did Joel think of his own actions, was he even thinking at all? Sam felt a sick sense of familiarity. There was a part of him that wanted to bite something.

“Um, Joel?” Sam said, Joel turned to look at him as he finished chewing. It was weird. It was a giant mouth eating sideways but still a mouth. Joel’s jaws would open momentarily, and Sam could see the rat viscera inside. It was rat goo with bits of fur and bones at this point.

Joel closed his mouth and swallowed. “Yes? Mr Sam?”

“Why did you eat that rat?”

Joel’s brows were creased in concentration. He was thinking deeply. His hand was in a fist and resting by the side of his mouth, in lieu of having a chin to place it on. “Hmm…”

“Were you hungry?”

“Not hhhh really.”

“Then why?”

Joel eventually shrugged. “Just seemed right.”

It just seemed… right? Was that what Sam had felt earlier that day? That it was just right. He tried to look back on his memories, to get a clear idea of what was in his head. There was… biting biting biting. There was hunger. There was fear. And there it was, the feeling that this was obviously the correct thing to do. Biting and eating anything that threatened him. Sam shuddered. He wanted to throw up. He could almost remember the taste of her.

“Uh, hello?” An unknown voice came. Sam wasn’t a religious man, otherwise he'd be thanking god right now for giving him something else to think about. The voice was coming from the direction of the dripping pipe, in fact the echoing indicated the voice was coming from inside the pipe.

Sam stood by the pipe. He thought about looking inside but had the feeling that might be a bad idea. Joel stood by his side. “Hello?” Sam said. “Are you inside the pipe?”

“Yes. Oh thank goodness, you’re only the second normal person who’s actually stopped to talk to me! Everybody else just walks by…” The voice in the pipe sounded sad. “My name is Rafta, who are you two?”

Sam and Joel introduced themselves to Rafta, the pipe women. The story of how she got that way was a bit odd. Sam wondered how big the end of the pipe had been or how small her apartment had become for her to confuse the pipe for a hallway. She seemed kind enough, but Sam wasn’t surprised people didn’t stop to talk to her. Her voice was quiet, you had to get close to even hear her in the first place. And even if you did, a talking pipe was probably something to avoid in a monster-filled apocalypse.

“Could you do me a favor?” Rafta asked.

“What is it?” Sam had already agreed to help Aster and Jeanne, he might as well help out a third person at this point.

“There was a guy I liked. His name’s Nester. I saw him and he talked to me a little. I want to see him again. Could you find a pen and some paper for me to write on? I want to write him a love letter.”

Sam had doubts as to if this Nester guy was still alive in all this or if he would even come back to talk to her or if he could even find the guy in the first place. But getting a pen and paper and delivering a letter (because he would probably have to do that too) weren’t a big ask. “Yeah I’ll help you.” He told Rafta.

“Thank you!”

So Sam and Joel exited the room and onto the first floor. Sam ignored the feeling he was being watched.

[shadowonwater]

It's Paint! Looking cute!

[shadowonwater]

So, about that new game over...

So for my next chapter of my fic, I was doing a little research on Spine, and I located some new dialogue if you don't kill Spine very fast.

SPOILERS AHEAD, Long post with screenshots. Sorry for the weird cropping, was in windowed mode.

I carefully controlled my damage, and eventually got this dialogue option.

If you kill her (also, she has confirmed pronouns now!) I believe she says "But why? I..." and dies.

If you spare her, she says this:

(Hooray, part of my other terrible fic in the drafts was confirmed!)

If you flee the battle, she says "No wait... come back!" (Punctuation likely wrong, didn't get a screenshot of it.)

The Spine encounters in the apartment change too, reflecting the fact that you know her. (Didn't get any there, Got limited images for the post!)

Re-entering the dark/meat apartment gets you these lines of dialogue:

Attacking her at this point will simply get you this:

You don't actually initiate combat, but return to the dialogue options from before.

In addition, It takes two attempts of pressing the (leave) command in order to actually exit dialogue. Nice touch!

I think its really neat that it somewhat reflects the roommate dialogue options. This is what "I just want to talk" gets you:

And here's what you get for "Could we trade?" (Sam... Why would she have anything to trade you? Why?)

Only two more sections left!

When you say "Yes. Remake me. Please." (Which God only knows how Sam ever thought this to be a good option.) It moves over to this:

Its nice, I suppose, that she gives you the option to back out. Even gives you a fair warning!

Saying "Wait, No..."

Shuddering at these lines, that's horrifying but sweet!

Saying Yes will prompt this to happen:

Total party wipe, along with knowledge that Spine no longer has tear ducts. Fun! (Ignore that it says Ash, was testing out the easter egg)

(Also, is this implying that whoever you have in your party might also share this same fate? Or does Spine just get rid of them so they can't interrupt? Fun!)

(Interesting that there's a new room/time pass/danger increase here.)

(Just before the fourth image, the screen flashes red like there's damage taken)

(Knew it looked like a mouth, like it stretched the original one down the length of her original spine.)

Ran out of space for images. Will reblog shortly with the completed ending!

[shadowonwater]

Deny Your (Inner) Eyes, Chapter 3: Teeth and Eyes

AO3

First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next

Warning: Blood, cannibalism, disassociation(?)

Morning for Sam was as follows: Check the News (They didn’t seem to know what was going on), Water his plant (He really needs to take better care of it), Greet Sybil (She was so worried about his arm, “It isn’t as bad as it looked” he told her), Brush Teeth (Double checking the mirror to make sure he looked normal), eating a quick breakfast of Pizza Bites (He needed to get more food), and then heading out the door.

Sam immediately pulled to a stop as he saw the door almost across from his own, as well as the bloodied man clutching his arm in front of it. Saying Clint was worse for wear would be an understatement. The man looked like he’d been through hell and back. And his arm… a mess of meat with hundreds of teeth growing out of it, didn’t look too hot. Clint, Sam thought, must have looked outside.

“Hey Clint…” Sam started as he held his knife at the ready. “How are you doing?”

Clint stumbled towards him, and Sam backed away in equal steps. “They’re growing, her beautiful baby teeth. You should grow the baby teeth too…” Clint kept moving forward and Sam kept moving back. Sam wanted to give Clint a chance to show that he was still himself but he seemed like he was just another monster.

“What do you mean Clint?”

“She bit me, my beautiful baby. And I’ll bite you. Need to grow them on you.” Clint said before he lunged forward.

Sam hadn’t thought. Just pure reaction. He stabbed the knife forward into Clint’s chest hitting him right in the heart. There was a crack. And Clint instantly turned into dead weight. Sam pushed the man off the blade where he flopped onto the ground. Sam lifted up his blade and examined it. The knife was cracked. The force of pushing it through the rib cage must have been too much for it.

What was Clint talking about, Sam wondered. Sam knew about the baby he and his wife Madison recently had. Hard to forget the day her water broke about 7 months ago. Sam remembered the chaos of EMT showing up because Madison was having some sort of complication and had to be rushed to the hospital. Sam was glad she ended up being fine. The realization that Madison probably wasn’t fine now, sobered him.

He looked down at Clint’s body and he felt something. Sadness. Horror. Regret. Sam dropped the bloodied knife. He did this. Stabbed Clint right through like he was just some sort of obstacle in Sam’s way. He didn’t want to be like this. But what was he supposed to do? Clint attacked him. Sam sighed as he looked at the open door of their apartment. If Clint was gone… his whole family was probably gone too.

The baby had bit Clint. That’s what Clint said. Was the baby gone then? Or was it just teething? But Clint said it in relation to the teeth growing on his arm. Did the baby’s bite cause that? But Sam thought that only people who looked outside transformed. Maybe both happened? Maybe she bit him and he looked outside. Sam had plans to go to the first floor today but that could wait for now. He needed more information about what happened to Clint.

Sam went into apartment 32.

It was dark. There was a large hole in the middle of the floor. And strange little teeth monsters. He wandered around as stealthily as he could. He poked his head into a couple of rooms without going in. The 3rd room he couldn’t check at all due to a missing door knob. One room was a bathroom, he could hear someone brushing their teeth and humming. Sam grabbed a mop and quickly left the room, he needed a new weapon. The other available room was the children’s room. There was a monstrous kid playing with army figures in the middle and a few more of the little tooth things.

The tooth things ran up to Sam and he quickly smashed them with the mop, leaving a pile of flesh and tooth shards where they had stood. He looked up at the playing kid, expecting it to attack him as well. But the kid completely ignored him, wrapped up in a game. Sam took this opportunity to explore the room. All the while, keeping one of his eyes on the kid, just in case.

If Sam remembered correctly, the two boys were named Joel and Ben. The playing kid was too young to be Joel, so he must be Ben. Where was Joel though? In the bedroom with the missing doorknob? Or had he been the one Sam heard brushing their teeth? Could Joel be somewhere else entirely? Sam checked in the closet and under the beds, the only notable thing he found was Joel’s teddy bear. That kid was always carrying that thing around. Why didn’t he have it now? Sam stayed still as his eyes sweeped the room. Joel wasn’t in here. Maybe whatever Joel has become would still be attached to his favorite toy? Ben sure was still attached to his. In case of emergency, Sam could probably distract Joel with the teddy bear.

Sam, not finding anything else in the room, including the missing door knob, left with Joel’s teddy bear to visit the bathroom and confront whatever was brushing their teeth in there.

When he got into the bathroom and turned the corner, it was the very same boy he was thinking about earlier. Joel heard walk up from behind and peeked to the side before going back to brushing his teeth. “Hi. Are you the doctor?” Joel said with a toothbrush-filled mouth. Joel… seemed normal?

“No, I’m your neighbor. Sam.”

“Oh yeah! You live across from us! Hang on, I'm brushing my teeth. It takes soooo hhhh long… it’s annoying.”

Sam hoped that it was normal kid-exasperation over self maintenance and not a sign there was something wrong. He was concerned over the gasp of air that came from Joel. “Why do you need a doctor?” Sam ventured asking.

“For my hhhh sister! She’s sick and needs a doctor. Dad went out to go look for one. Did you see hhhh him on your way in?”

Oh no. Sam was not going to tell this child that he killed his father. “Uh… briefly. He said something about being bit by your sister?”

“Yeah she hhhh bit all of us. She bit me right on the nose. It hurt.”

“Oh I’m sorry.” Sam was having the sinking feeling that it was the little sister biting them that made them change. If this was true… Joel was a monster or will be one soon. “Uh… by any chance did you look outside?”

“I’m ok, I didn’t cry. I’m a big boy! Hhhhh I didn’t look outside but my little sister did. Hang on almost hhhh done, just need to brush the 3rd row.”

That settled it. Sam was pretty sure Joel was a monster too. However, unlike his father, he was lucid. Ben and that Lyle guy were also fine. With all the monsters Sam has had to fight, he needed to make sure to assume that not everyone that was changed was lost. He wouldn’t want to hurt someone if they weren’t going to hurt him. “Joel, are you ok?”

“There! Done!” Joel turned around and Sam got a clear view of the giant month that was taking over Joel’s head and running into his chest. Something about that giant mouth gave Sam a sick feeling of familiarity that he immediately shook off. “I’m ok Mr. Sam. It’s just hhhhh takes a really long time to brush my teeth. It keeps taking longer too because more keep hhhh growing.”

Sam watched in sick fascination as just when Joel finished his sentence, the mouth spread farther. Joel made a startled sound as the mouth moved towards his eye. Sam watched as the eye almost seemed to roll into Joel’s mouth as increasingly large jaws took over the space where Joel’s face was supposed to be. Joel’s hands moved up to his face feeling around. It was hard to make out what Joel was mumbling. Something about… “Fuzzy”? 

Sam snapped to a realization and shoved Joel’s teddy bear into his hands. The boy held onto it like a drowning man clings to driftwood. “Fuzzy.” Joel said again. Joel looked up at Sam, however someone can ‘look up’ without eyes, and dashed into him for a hug. Sam startled, he almost pushed Joel away but resisted the urge, the kid needed a hug. Even when he felt some of Joel’s teeth digging into him, he didn’t hold it against the kid. And he ignored some strange part of himself that wanted to bite the kid back.

When Joel pulled back, he sniffled, and handed Sam a doorknob. “Can you go hhhhh check on my mom? She’s in the room with the missing doorknob.”

Sam pat the top of Joel’s head. “Of course I’ll check up on her.” Sam hoped she was sane. He really really hoped. He didn’t want to make Joel or Ben orphans. If Ben and Joel were both ok, maybe Madison would be ok? Even if Clint and their baby girl weren’t.

Madison wasn’t ok. He tried to reason with her. He really did. She didn’t know who he was. She thought he was her baby. Sam wondered what his actual mother was doing during this time. He held out hope she hadn’t met the same fate that Madison did. Mutated. Losing her mind. Dead. Murdered.

He walked past Madison’s dead body, grabbing things from the kitchen and around her room. He found the toy soldier and noted that Ben would appreciate it if Sam gave it to him. Like Joel with Fuzzy. As he took the items, he told himself it was for the greater good. Joel couldn’t stay here, neither could Ben, both their parents were dead. He had to convince them to come with him. And if he was going to have two young boys in his apartment he would need more stuff for them. All the same, with his new found habit of taking stuff, he wondered if he would take stuff even if Madison was okay.

After ransacking what he could, he headed towards the bedroom door, his intention on talking to the two boys. At the moment, he had forgotten about the other kid. The baby girl. He hadn’t stopped to wonder where she was.

A horrific creature threw itself from the hole that spread between the living room and the bedroom, breaking a few floor boards and widening the hole just a bit. The cries that had permeated the apartment grew to a crescendo.

And Sam reacted.

What happened was a blur. What happened is something Sam would never want to admit too. Whether or not he was willing to admit to what he was (a monster). And he is. He is a monster. What other word could he use to describe what happened? 

There was biting. A lot of biting. From both parties. He was big again. And he could see so much again. And Sam was biting, biting, biting. It felt like the only thing that mattered. Sam’s mop and gun were cast aside, he didn’t need them. He bit. He bit. He bit.

Until there was nothing else left to bite.

And Sam sat back satisfied, and full.

There was something he could vaguely recall he was supposed to do right now… what was it? His eyes scanned his surroundings. There was a safe behind him. The ground was splattered in blood. His bag that he was carrying his things in got knocked over. Oh yes! The little army figure fell out of the bag. He remembered now! He was going to bring the boys home with him.

Maneuvering a bunch of legs can be tough. But as he made his way to the bedroom door, it got easier. He was having less and less legs to worry about, much more simple, less eyes too. He made his way through the bedroom, through the living room, and into the bathroom.

Joel was startled when he looked at him. Sam could see a bit better now. He could see the eyes in the back of Joel’s throat, obscured by darkness. So that’s how the kid could see. Why was he so startled? Why did he look a little scared?

“M-Mr Sam! There’s hhhh blood all over you!”

Oh? There was? Sam moved a couple of eyes to look down. He only had about 5 at this point, all on his face. Indeed, the front of Sam’s body was caked in blood, it was all over his mouth too. He licked his lips. Still wet, but getting tacky. He needed to take a shower.

“Hey Joel! You and your brother can’t really stay here. It’s dangerous to be on your own.”

Joel stared at him. Unsure. Then looked down at Fuzzy in his arms. Joel shuddered and nodded. “O- hhhhh okay.”

Sam and Joel went to the kid’s bedroom. Sam tried to get Ben attention with the toy. Sam played with Ben. And then Ben… stopped moving. Sam starred. This wasn’t the plan. After all this, and he only saved one son? Sam felt something drip down his face, at first he thought it was some of the blood, but then he realized it was a tear.

He heard Joel’s voice. “C’mon Mr Sam. You’ve been hhhhh staring at Ben for 5 minutes! Aren’t we going to your place?”

There was something in Sam that was cracking. Emotion rolled into him like a wave at high tide. He killed Joel’s family. All of Joel’s family. He was a monster. “Yes. Sorry Joel. Let’s go home.”

[shadowonwater]

Made a Look Outside OC

Name: Guy Deere

Species: Cursed (Witness)

Occupation/Hobby: Hunter

Guy Deere got fused with one of his hunting trophy when he opened the window and saw The Visitor. Now he spends his time trying to fend off all the transformed wild animals in the woods while trying to find SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, who is either un-transformed or at least still sane.