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Celine & Saint Laurent Paris

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Dark Universe McElroys

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so uhhhhhh i know this is a plant blog but realtalk lads im a little freaked out by that wild ass new organ discovered in our bodies according to a paper published literally yesterday am i right my lads, my bois, lmao hhaha

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How to write a kick ass cover letter.

Hi everyone! Above is a sample of a cover letter I wrote to apply for a job at a tech startup. I received a quick callback for this job, but I was already signed on to another position. Using this format has been basically foolproof for me, because it’s professional and reads as well-spoken, but also gets your point across and keeps the focus on the employer. I’ll break this up into sections. 

First, formatting: Your cover letter should match your resume in some way. You should use the same font or colors somewhere. I cropped off the top half because it has my address and phone number on it, but it has my name and contact info on it the same way my resume does. 

It should never be more than a page long. Honestly, I think the example I’m using is a little too long and wordy, but I think startups appreciate the extra effort because it shows you’re willing to be above average.

Opening paragraph: “I am excited to apply for your Customer Service Lead position. Glowforge is my idea of a perfect company because it bridges the gap between the creative and tech communities. I’d love to bring my energy and drive along with my relevant experience to your innovative company.” 

In the first sentence, I state that I am excited to apply for the position. I’ve been in charge of hiring for a few different jobs I’ve had, and 99.999% of all cover letters start with something very dull like, “I am writing to inquire about the receptionist position.” That doesn’t make me interested in learning more about you! Using an energetic adjective like “excited” can be intriguing to employers because they know you will go on to explain how in the rest of your letter. Perhaps you have a personal connection to the company, or you are extremely passionate about something they make or do. 

First paragraph:  “ For the past three years, I worked as a bookkeeper and payroll specialist for My Seattle Bookkeeper. I helped grow the company from 20 to 60+ clients in this time, acting as the first point of contact for every incoming and ongoing client. I have also acted as office manager and employee coordinator, leading a team of four employees to meet monthly, quarterly, and annual goals. In this position I fine-tuned my communication skills and helped to find specific solutions to diverse problems. I loved making our clients happy and simplifying their business operations with my accounting skills and go-getter personality.”

The point of a cover letter is to expand on your resume and support the evidence your resume provides. It is where you should explain any significant gaps in your employment history, or explain why you made a major career or college switch. You should also use it to expand on job tasks and discuss how the skills at one job will help you at the job you are applying for. Because my job at MSB was not really client facing (I worked remotely in a basement, lol) and very analytical/mathematical, I used this paragraph in my cover letter to explain how I demonstrated growth in this position and what skills I gained. I specifically brought up communication and making clients happy because the position I was applying for was customer-facing.

Your first paragraph after your opening paragraph should discuss what you’ve done and expand on anything that might need explaining or stringing together.

Second paragraph: “I would love to work at Glowforge because I am a maker. In my spare time I love to knit, quilt, sew, and design. I recently taught myself HTML and CSS and I am currently learning JavaScript. I am fascinated with the concept of blending hands-on art and design with software and technology. There is a gap in the tech-maker community, and the fact that Glowforge has so many excited customers before the product has launched speaks strongly to the necessity of the product. Being a part of a growing startup has always been a dream of mine, and my interests and skills are perfect for this position.”

Your second paragraph should be about WHY you want the job. Don’t be afraid to tell them about yourself in a relevant way! This makes it unique and lets them get to know you a bit more. It also shows you are creative and can think further than copying and pasting a boring form cover letter. This should of course be used within reason; if you’re applying at a big 4 accounting firm you should definitely scale it back, but I’ve found that for smaller businesses and start ups and jobs that require an outgoing personality, this is the best method.

Be sure to tie it all together though! Notice how I share a fact about myself (my love of fiber arts) and then lead into how I am teaching myself computer programming. I then use a segue sentence that allows me to move on and talk about their company and why I want to work for their company. 

In this paragraph you should also demonstrate that you have researched the company and know what they’re about. Reference something specific but interesting about them so they know that you care about the company, care about the job, and have done your research! I’m not positive, but I think this piece is the reason I get so many interviews when I use this format. Showing that you are passionate about the job no matter what it is and that you are a hard worker who goes above and beyond is really important at this stage - you really have to sell yourself! 

At the end of this paragraph, be sure to choose a conclusion sentence that ties it back in to the your intro about your hobbies. Always tie it together.

Final paragraph:  “ Again, Glowforge’s dedication to customer happiness and leadership has made a huge impression on me. I would be thrilled to work for a company that values data-driven work and user success as much as Glowforge does.”

Your conclusion is your chance to tie it all together and gas them up. Give them a compliment that reiterates their company mission and values. Show that you understand what they’re all about and that you will be a valuable asset to keep them moving towards their goals.

Salutation: “Thank you for your time! I look forward to hearing from you soon.”

Always thank them! Hiring people is hard work and they read a million of these in the process. Also, ACT CONFIDENT throughout the entire process, but especially in your salutation. Let them know that you know you are a perfect fit and they will want to contact you. Fake it til you make it. This also helps you to follow up with them in a few days if you haven’t heard from them yet. Include your phone number in the email or body of the contact form when you send your PDF resume and cover letter. 

I basically took this template from here and tweaked it, sending it out over and over, until I found what works best for me. Feel free to copy it and tweak it with your own skills and interests! 

Thinking about doing a 2018 resume dos and don’ts next - so much has changed recently and we can be a bit more creative with resumes these days! Let me know what you think!

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The Kiss (also known as The May Irwin Kiss, The Rice-Irwin Kiss and The Widow Jones) is an 1896 film, and was one of the first films ever shown commercially to the public. Around 18 seconds long, it depicts a re-enactment of the kiss between May Irwin and John Rice from the final scene of the stage musical The Widow Jones.

The film contained the very first kiss on film, with a close-up of a nuzzling couple followed by a short peck on the lips (“the mysteries of the kiss revealed”). The kissing scene was denounced as shocking and obscene to early moviegoers and caused the Roman Catholic Church to call for censorship and moral reform - because kissing in public at the time could lead to prosecution.[1]

The film caused a scandalized uproar and occasioned disapproving newspaper editorials and calls for police action in many places where it was shown. One contemporary critic wrote, “The spectacle of the prolonged pasturing on each other’s lips was beastly enough in life size on the stage but magnified to gargantuan proportions and repeated three times over it is absolutely disgusting.”[2]

The Edison catalogue advertised it this way: “They get ready to kiss, begin to kiss, and kiss and kiss and kiss in a way that brings down the house every time.”

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fashion looks that make all gay ppl nut:

high waisted + crop top concept where that bit of skin above the belly but below the chest shows? u know that Rib Flab? m fuckign gay

in a similar vein u know the mom jeans over fishnets look really does get me pregnant every damn time

backwards baseball cap with the curls peaking out

longe sweater over short skirt thanks

hawaiian shirts worn in any way

berets over short hair? mmmmm delicious

that soft 80s sweater and mom jeans with the black belt fashion INVENTION that looks like something dj tanner in full house would wear? mood

Baggy Sweater With The Sleeves Pushed To The Elbow a la robert sean leonard in this video

the ‘im wearing my significant other’s jacket or hoodie and it is significantly Too Large’ statement

turtlenecks under baseball shirts U Know What I Mean

GOLFING OUTFITS u know u had a thing for chad danforth in his golfing outfit don’t lie to my face

bowtie + suspenders combo we all know we’ve all talked about it we act like it’s in the past but i know… i know the truth im onto all of u

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jess’ nonfiction podcast recommendation list: It’s Long Folks

legal disclaimer: not an endorsement of all content of political podcasts or all jokes of comedy podcasts, don’t @ me

Keep reading

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depression tips™

shower. not a bath, a shower. use water as hot or cold as u like. u dont even need to wash. just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. sit on the floor if you gotta.

moisturize everything. use whatever lotion u like. unscented? dollar store lotion? fancy ass 48 hour lotion that makes u smell like a field of wildflowers? use whatever you want, and use it all over. 

put on clean, comfortable clothes. 

put on ur favorite underwear. cute black lacy panties? those ridiculous boxers u bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? put em on.

drink cold water. use ice. if u want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost.

clean something. doesn’t have to be anything big. organize one drawer of ur desk. wash five dirty dishes. do a load of laundry. scrub the bathroom sink. 

blast music. listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.

make food. don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. take the time and make food. even if it’s ramen. add something special to it, like a hard boiled egg or some veggies. prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something. 

make something. write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. even if you don’t think you’re good at it.

go outside. take a walk. sit in the grass. look at the clouds. smell flowers. put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.

call someone. call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. talk to a stranger on the street. have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. if you can’t, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. even if you don’t say much, listen to them.

cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them. take pictures of them. talk to them. tell them how u feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out.

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One thing I think is useful to conceptualize when thinking about the severity of depression is figuring out what counts as a ‘task’ to your brain

for example, healthy people outlining the tasks they need to do that day might be something like 

- class - work - homework

if a healthy person is having a low energy day, maybe it becomes 

- make breakfast - go to class - class - go to work - work - come home from work - work on an essay - do 2 readings 

a depressed person, on a high energy day will probably see that same day as 

- make breakfast - eat breakfast - take meds - shower - get dressed - walk to bus - take bus … etc

a depressed person, on a low energy day will see that same day as

- wake up - get out of bed - walk to bathroom - use bathroom - stand back up - walk to kitchen - open fridge - take out juice - set on counter - go to cabinet - reach up arm - take down glass - unscrew lid of juice carton - pour juice - drink the juice - finish the juice …etc

the sort of chronic exhaustion manifests in how each ‘task’ takes a certain amount of energy and when you have depression, what begins to take that amount of energy- and thus, cognitively count as a ‘task’- are smaller and smaller subdivisions of what other people consider tasks. 

And the more ‘tasks’ you do, the less energy you have, and the smaller the subdivisions must be to take equivalent amounts of energy. And the longer that “to do” list of tasks is, the more exhausting and overwhelming and hopeless it feels, which creates a feedback loop of dysfunction.

So say our depressed person on a low energy day gets all the way to finishing their glass of juice. They’ve actually gotten through a lot of tasks! They’ve tried really hard. 

But to a healthy person, even on a low energy day, that probably looks like not having done anything- not having gotten through any tasks. And when our depressed person is surrounded by healthy people, they will likely internalize that they haven’t done anything, and further that they can’t complete any tasks no matter how hard they try. And that feeds worthlessness and suicidal ideation 

That, I think, is why it’s so important to encourage your depressed and chronically low-energy friends when they accomplish tasks, even if they’re operating at a level of subdivision that you don’t recognize. It is an accomplishment to get water and actually drink it for some folks. It is an accomplishment to get to class or to work. 

And acknowledging how hard someone is trying and how much energy they’re putting towards accomplishing those tasks can make a huge difference in whether they feel worthless and hopeless or whether they feel like it’s worth it to keep doing what they can.

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fucked up how cooking and baking from scratch is viewed as a luxury…..like baking a loaf of bread or whatever is seen as something that only people with money/time can do. I’m not sure why capitalism decided to sell us the idea that we can’t make our own damn food bc it’s a special expensive thing that’s exclusive to wealthy retirees but it’s stupid as hell and it makes me angry

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Emergency cleaning: Unfuck your whole house in the shortest time possible

So, your landlord/parent/home inspector/favorite movie star is dropping by, and your place is a disaster. You don’t have much time to clean it up. You’re in emergency mode. Let’s get started.

Don’t panic. Panic leads to fear, fear leads to procrastination, procrastination leads to the dark side. You can do this, but you have to stay calm.

Unlike maintenance cleaning, we’re not looking to completely unfuck one space at a time. Instead, we want to decrease the overall mess in stages, spread evenly across the whole area that we’re concerned about. If you think your home is at Level 10 filth, we want to bring the whole thing down to a Level 9, and then down from there. One really clean spot in an otherwise messy home is not going to be helpful here.

Get prepared. You’ll want to shut the computer down (or turn the modem off if you need your computer to play music). Trust me. Get your music going. Gather up trash bags, your vacuum and mop, some rags or paper towel, sponges, and other cleaning supplies. Use what you have on hand. Don’t get distracted running to the store and spending an hour browsing cleaning supplies. A multi-purpose cleaning concentrate or a jug of vinegar will be just fine.

Breaks are very important. Depending on your time constraints, work in 20/10s (20 minutes working, 10-minute break) or 45/15s. But take breaks because otherwise you’re marathoning, and marathon cleaning is no one’s friend. Keep hydrated, don’t forget to eat, and check in with yourself frequently to make sure you’re physically doing OK.

Make your bed. This will be your home base if you get overwhelmed or need somewhere clear to take a break.

Start with the garbage. Going from room to room, throw out anything that is obvious trash. Once you fill a bag, take it out. Repeat as many times as necessary.

Move on to dishes. Gather the dishes from all over your house and bring them to the kitchen. If you can, start them soaking in a sink of hot, soapy water or start loading the dishwasher. After the dishes are all in one place, spend one 20/10 getting started getting them under control.

Now it’s time for your flat surfaces. Countertops, tables, dresser tops, etc. Clear them off and wipe them down. Don’t get distracted in too much sorting and organizing. We’re in crisis mode here. There will be time to get in-depth once this is all done. The same applies to cabinets and closets. Unless you have reason to believe people will be opening closed doors, leave these alone for now.

Attack the floordrobe and shoe pile. Get your clothes either put away or in the hamper. Start a load of laundry if you need to, but keep in mind that laundry and dishes have three steps: wash, dry, and put it away, goddammit!

Get random stuff up off the floors. If something is trash-worthy, throw it away now rather than just move it around a bunch of times. Otherwise, put stuff where it belongs.

Take another 20/10 or 45/15 to catch up on more dishes, if needed.

Head into the bathroom. Pour some cleaner in the toilet bowl, fill the sink with hot water and cleaner, and either spray the tub and shower with cleaner, or fill the tub up with some hot water and add cleaner and let it soak. Put everything away that’s out and shouldn’t be, clean the mirror, counters, and toilet seat. Sweep or dry mop the floor. Wipe down the sink and tub/shower, and give the toilet bowl a scrub. Mop the floor.

Sweep and mop the kitchen floor.

Vacuum everything you can, and sweep everything you can’t.

Walk outside of your house (don’t lock yourself out, please). Walk back in and see what catches your eye first. Go and deal with that.

If you’re being inspected or your landlord is coming in for repairs, spend time on whatever area they’ll be focusing on.

Give the whole place one more once-over and pay attention to anything you’ve missed so far.

It’s an old trick, but if your place is a little funky-smelling, put a pan of water on the stove on low heat and add some citrus or cinnamon or vanilla. Don’t leave it unattended or forget about it.

Take a shower, put on something clean, and eat something.

You can do this. It’s overwhelming, yes, but it is not impossible. You just need to do it. You have a list. You have directions. You have a whole bunch of Internet strangers who have been there before and who are cheering you on. You can do this, but you need to get started.

Why are you still here? GO. START. NOW.

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No one quite understands the dark magics that hold my potato body together.

Griffin McElroy (via mbmbam-ooc)

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the most salient and urgent aspect of the experience of women in cults that i’ve been reading about lately is that no matter what the exact ideology behind the group is, whether it be free love or strict marriage, liberal or conservative leaning, spiritual or political, there is almost always a sexual behavior that is pressured if not compulsory and the morality, dedication, worth, and social standing of the female members is symbolically linked to their ability to perform whatever that expected sexual behavior is. this is of course a major component to why sexual abuse is so rampant in these groups - there is not only a culture of acceptance and suppression of dissent (often with structures or pressures in place meant to keep women from speaking even to each other about it) but that the threat of expulsion from your social world, along with reinforcements about your sexual behavior from people you ideologically look to for answers/guilt for not living up to it, are pretty damn powerful forces… here’s some of the pdfs i’m reading for reference women after the utopia: gendered lives of former cult members, miriam williams boeri dominance and submission: the psychosexual exploitation of women in cults, janja lalich 

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A year later I’m still not over this

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THESE ARE REAL ADS ON THE SUBWAY I SAW ONE BUT GO CALL THE NUMBER AND PRESS ALL THE MENU OPTIONS OH MY GOD

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concept playlists part ii

it’s the year 2077 & you’re at a nightclub in tokyo with your best friend, you’re both on the run from a group of rebels but you feel safe in this little neon corner of nowhere so when a robot waiter offers you a strawberry daiquiri you accept it you’re a tourist on mars & you’re trying to contact home but the signal is really crappy so you just end up buying yourself an icecream sundae & waiting in this strange alien queue to buy an interstellar sim card you’re in a small virginian town that was wiped off the map several years ago housesitting for a mysterious neighbor when you find a secret passageway in their library, you have no idea where it leads but you’re curious to take a look  you’re in victorian england & you’re walking down a path adorned with the warm aureate glow of gaslights & it’s snowing softly & you have your hands buried deep in your coat pockets while somewhere in the distance, someone announces that the queen is dead you meet god at a gas station at 3.03 am & he asks you if you want to go for a motorcycle ride with him & when you say yes he warns you that he’s about to introduce you to things you can never unknow 

you’re in love with a ghost who shows up in all your household mirrors & keeps turning off the kitchen light but one night you realize that you’re the one that’s been doing all the haunting  it’s a rehab centre for celestial beings, where angels with dying halos flitter past & talk to you of stars, you love working this job, learning about the woes of a dozen flighty beings, & they endow you with their strength & light in return you’re stuck in a time loop inside of a 80′s horror flick and your entire world feels like it’s glitching around you nothing is real except for your strange lover with eyes like moonlight calling you to come back to bed  you’re at an island at midnight all by yourself, the night sky is so clear the sea reflects the star-matted sky, a salty breeze lifts your hair, you breathe in deep & dream of someone beautiful coming to your rescue

xtras: hotmess / midyouth crisis / mud puppy / lucid dreaming

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Gamescom Booth Tour