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To be continue...

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I am needing a mermaid Uhtred AU in this world. Just imagine the potential! This boy is always in the water btw!

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Where are the AlfredxUhtred fans?? I mean, It’s a great ship, full of denied romance and tragedy! Whatever, here is my contribution to this amazing couple!

Temptation and punishment

Drama

Romance

Angst

Rated: M

Summary: Uthred kidnaps the King of Wessex.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25195138/chapters/61063132

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So, we can discuss anything...But she was his first love !

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Sexual problems with Dr. Sally

Sumary:   An alternate version of Murray Franklin's interview.

Rated: T

"Now let's introduce the next guest .."

"Does he also have sexual problems?"

"Oh yes! And many others too!"

Murray gestures with one of his hands to get the attention of the attendees. As a circus director, everyone on stage is watching him.

Arthur could not have faced an audience that is there to make fun of him. He could not have tolerated Murray's condescending gaze, the hurtful comments.

Arthur takes the stage with a confidence he has never felt, nor will he feel. Because who introduces himself dancing and doing tricks is not him but another. The other who lives under his skin and can face these situations.

"Let's welcome Joker!"

He kisses Dr. Sally as soon as he reaches the sector that serves as a living room to simulate an illusory intimacy. She protests weakly but lets herself be done, visibly shocked at the effusive greeting of the new guest.

He smiles pleased with himself. His entry has not been irrelevant.

"Well, Joker, if that's how you want us to call you, have you been working on your material?"

Murray is sitting on his left. He is relaxed, his body seems to occupy as much space as possible. The boss. The king of the place.

"Actually Murray, I have a problem for Dr. Sally."

"Oh?" Murray raises an eyebrow exchanging a quick glance with his colleague.

"Oh yes, well you know that the health system in Gotham is not the most accessible. It's hard to talk to a doctor .."

From the periphery he can see that the producer makes signals but Murray has always done what he pleases with his program. Joker has counted on that.

"Well, very good."

Murray makes a sign with his hand. A magnanimous king. Dr. Sally reaffirms herself in her chair attentive to his question.

"Dr. Sally, as Murray said before introducing me, I have a sexual problem."

The howl of the public is instantaneous. He knows that these people react to the words on the signs.

"Oh well." Sally moves restlessly on the couch. Her discomfort becoming noticeable.

"I don't think this is the best place for .."

"Oh but doctor!" He interrupts her using a voice that looks too much like a plea "I won't have a chance to talk to another doctor in a long time and this is very important to me!"

Sally exchanges another look with Murray who nods slightly. He has captured the attention of the public. The numbers are going up. What does it matter if the guest is humiliated in the process?

"My problem.."

Joker lets pass a few seconds. Suspense. His tongue slowly passes over his lips.

"My problem is that I'm always hot."

The howls of the public resonate again in the studio. Some whistles and sporadic applause. Arthur would never understand the scandal that people made when they referred to sexual issues. Joker instead ..

"Well, that's normal for a man your age. Tell me, do you have any girlfriend?"

It is evident that this is not the direction that interviews usually take. Despite that, Dr. Sally tries to hide her discomfort behind a rationality screen.

"Oh no. I don't have any girlfriend. Actually .."

He tilts his head to the side, running a hand through his hair.

"I would really like to have a boyfriend .."

Squeals and howls disapproving. The occasional "Fagot" is heard over the screaming. Murray decides to intervene.

"Oh no, no, no!"

He makes a calm gesture with his hands.

"In this program we do not judge the sexual preference of our guests!"

He says it seriously, staring at the camera. It would have been easy to take his words for truth if it weren't for the fact that everything that happens there is scripted. The reaction of the people. The politically correct position of Murray. Everything happens as if there was no subject holding a sign in front of the public.

Joker smiles at the Machiavellian display.

In that society the spectators of the program would react in the same way as the people in the studio. Repudiation, disgust, rejection. But at the same time, they would admire the tolerance of the presenter.

"In fact, Murray ..."

His gaze seeks Murray's.

"I would like to have a boyfriend like you."

Obviously, this takes Murray by surprise, but he quickly recovers. Vanity seems to overcome displeasure.

"Like me?" The tone is condescending, Murray looks at the camera winking, convinced of his own appeal.

"I think I'm a little older for you, son."

At another time, Arthur would have given anything for Murray Franklin to use that word with him. Even if it was just a way of saying, feeling his child would have opened a light of happiness in his life. At another time.

Now..

"Do you think so? I think it would be nice to be with someone like you. An adult man who can take care of me and protect me. That can defend me in front of a crowd like you have."

Murray moves in the chair. Something in his words is taking effect.

"Well, that won't happen .."

"And why not? I thought you didn't judge people by their sexual preferences."

Murray is uncomfortable. He knows that he has put himself in an awkward position but cannot openly reject him because that would mean the opposite of his supposed posture of goodness and tolerance.

"You should give me a chance. I would be a good boy for you Muraaay." He extends the vowel of his name as he blinks rapidly.

"Well, I .."

An expectant silence settles in the studio. It is clear that there is a sadistic interest in seeing how the presenter, who always has a way out for everything, seems to have run out of answers. Joker enjoys it as much as he can until ..

"I'm just kidding! This is part of my material." A shrill laugh accompanies his words.

For a second no one seems to understand until, suddenly, the guy who is sitting next to Dr. Sally, brings his hand to his mouth to contain a laugh. Soon, everyone is laughing, leaving behind the tense episode.

He is leaving the studio, his hands busy trying to light a cigarette, when a voice stops him.

"You really gave that idiot a taste of his own medicine. They'll probably invite you again."

For a moment, he has trouble recognizing her even though minutes ago he has been sitting next to her. Dr. Sally, dressed in street clothes and smoking in the alley, looks like a different person. She notices his gaze.

"Oh yes, I'm not supposed to smoke, being a doctor and all that ..." She throws the ash aside.

"But putting up with this shit every week doesn't leave me with many options."

Joker raises an eyebrow. There is nothing of the dignified and conservative lady who has known through the program over time. Evidently, she also simulated a character.

"Oh, and by the way .."

Sally finishes her cigarette, discards it and steps on it. She stands by his side. He is much taller than her but somehow that doesn't seem to matter. Sally places a hand on his chest making a sign to approach. He hunches over until his face is almost the same height as hers.

"Next time you want to kiss me .." she whispers conspiratorially.

"You better take me to dinner before .."

She pats him before walking away. Joker smiles halfway. He takes her hand making an extravagant bow.

"Take it for granted."

Life was still a comedy.

End

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My name is Carnival

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x Joker x Carnival

Summary: Carnival always gets scared when Joker shouts. Most of the time the shouts are not even directed at him, but that doesn’t matter. Carnival ends up hiding in some corner of the apartment and it is Arthur’s job to eventually get him out of there. Or how Arthur’s different personalities deal with each other.

Fear    

The worst is when he dances. When Joker dances it means he has done something terrible. Carnival knows it.

In those moments Joker has entered as an exhalation to the department and has begun to dance. His suit is stained red. Carnival knows what that means.

“Are you all right ?! What happened ?!”

Arthur is distressed. He is always worried if one of the two may be injured. It doesn't matter that Joker seems immune to everything. Arthur doesn´t stop going after him when the red has stained his suit.

Joker smiles enigmatically. While he still dances he takes Arthur´s face in his hands and kisses him on the mouth. Arthur is paralyzed at this and Carnival thinks he is going to push him away sharply but no. The two look at each other for a few seconds and smile as if celebrating a private joke. Carnival can't help feeling hopelessly alone.

Soon, Arthur returns to his side on the couch, in his hands a bundle of bills like he had never seen. Carnival does not know much about money but judging by size is more than they have done working in a month.

He is so distracted by the gift that the other has given Arthur that he does not realize the moment when he is taken out of the couch until he is standing next to Joker ...

Joker, who dances around him with a slow rhythm, following a melody that only he can hear ...

Joker, who moves behind him and wraps him in a hug until his back makes contact with the other's chest ..

Joker, who exhales the smoke from his cigarette inches from his ear, one of his hands slowly going down his torso touching the vest of his suit ..

“Arthur?”

There is something similar to panic in his voice. He doesn't understand Joker's behavior and that makes him feel insecure. He thinks he is going to hurt him.

He always speaks very softly when he is scared so that Arthur does not listen to him ..

He doesn't listen him until suddenly he does. A gasp screams out of his mouth at the moment when one of Joker's hands brushes his private parts. A small puddle of water suddenly forming at his feet.

He had peed himself.

More on:https://archiveofourown.org/works/21561610/chapters/51403504

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Imagine this..

What about if in that journal scene, you know, when he writes his iconic phrase ("The worst part of having a mental illness..") He just started to talk with Joker. I mean like in HP and the chamber of secrets...

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I need to be paid! please ace! make your magic!

This is the Lucky Ace. Reblog to recieve a wad of cash that is oddly specific to your current needs.

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My name is Carnival

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x Joker x Carnival

Summary: Carnival always gets scared when Joker shouts. Most of the time the shouts are not even directed at him, but that doesn’t matter. Carnival ends up hiding in some corner of the apartment and it is Arthur’s job to eventually get him out of there. Or how Arthur’s different personalities deal with each other.

Park    

The park is deserted at that time but he knows that the children will arrive soon. There are at least two schools in the area.

This is his chance. He may have lost his job because of his incompetence but he will not lose hope. If nobody wants to hire him, there is only one option left.

Carnival outlines his best smile, places his hat on the floor and begins rehearsing his dance steps. With the wand in his hand, he advances in the direction of the first group of children.

At the time he returns home the train is full. People press him against the handrail and the suit stings him from the heat. But he feels satisfied. He has managed to get three bills and a few coins. It is nothing compared to what he earned in his old job but it is something.

Once he enters the apartment he suddenly finds Arthur who, judging by his state of semi-nudity, seems to go to the bathroom.

“Where have you been? I was worried.”

“I went for a walk.” Carnival smiles at him. He likes it when Arthur cares about him.

Arthur looks at him for a second before discarding any idea that has formed in his mind.

“Don't leave again so late. It is dangerous out there.”

“No, Arthur.” He responds obediently.

Seconds after Arthur enters to bathe, he slips into the bedroom and places the money raised in one of his pants. He prefers to do it that way so as not to hurt his ego. No matter how he got the money, the important thing is that Arthur is happy.

Carnival smiles proudly of himself, not realizing that someone else has watched his actions. Joker raises an eyebrow.

More on:https://archiveofourown.org/works/21561610/chapters/51403504

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"Now, you will like the next guest .."

"Does he also have sexual problems?"

"Oh yes! And many others too!"

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Ok, it´s me again! Cause I think ArthurxJokerxCarnival ship deserves all the love in this world!

A matter of size    

Summary: "I think you're bigger than me." Arthur gives a significant look at Joker's crotch.

"You know, down there."

Joker lowers the newspaper to see him directly. For a few seconds his expression is illegible, until his face slowly transforms. The crooked smile and the eyebrow rising.

"Do you have any idea how absurd that sounds?"

Warnings: Mentions of threesome, Mentions of size diference. Mostly Humor

Rating: Mature

Length: 1,028

Outside is a gray day. A faint drizzle soaks the streets. Fortunately, it's Sunday and they don´t have to leave. Arthur has turned on the stove, so a cozy warmth envelops the room. They are enjoying a pleasant everyday life, when Arthur's voice is heard above the contest program.

"I think you're bigger than me."

Arthur gives a significant look at Joker's crotch.

"You know, down there."

Joker lowers the newspaper to see him directly. For a few seconds his expression is illegible, until his face slowly transforms. The crooked smile and the eyebrow rising.

"Do you have any idea how absurd that sounds?"

Arthur runs a hand through his hair and then lights a cigarette.

"I know. It's just a comment."

His attention returns to the contest program. Some faint shrieks are heard from the bedroom. Carnival is practicing making animals with balloons. For a few minutes neither of them says anything else.

"Ok, I have to know."

Joker puts aside the newspaper and lower his pants.

"Wait! What are you ..?"

Too late. Joker's cock is visible in all its glory.

"Well, now we have to know. What are you waiting for?" Joker asks while standing up placing his hands on his hips.

Arthur feels the blush rise to his cheeks. Somehow, he had forgotten how impulsive his counterpart could be.

"This is silly." He mutters, although he unzips his pants.

Joker watches him with a funny expression.

"Oh, sure! You say those things and then I'm silly. Come, stand by my side."

Carnival flips the globe one more time. He is proud that he has finally managed to do it. Well, the kitten's head is somewhat crooked, but maybe with a little more practice ...

He goes to the living room to look for more balloons, when ..

Oh!

Arthur and Joker are standing in the middle of the living room, naked from the waist down.

"I didn't know you were going to do sexy things so early. I just came for my bag."

His hands look frantically in the closet where he usually stores his things. He had already seen them naked on many occasions but that didn't stop shaming him.

"Hey, Carnival! Come here!"

Carnival doubts. Joker always had strange ideas that felt good at first, but then ended up hurting his lower back. Then, he could not sit or walk comfortably and that was a problem if he wanted to finish rehearsing his routine.

"We are not going to do that this time!" Joker makes a gesture with his hand discarding the idea.

"We just need your opinion about something."

At that, his attitude changes. Arthur needed his opinion for something. Arthur needed him.

The crotches of Arthur and Joker are in front of his face. Their manhoods asleep above their testicles. The television broadcasts the cheerful song of a commercial. Carnival doubts.

"I'm not sure.."

On the periphery of his vision, he can see that Joker rolls his eyes sighing in disgust.

"From that angle you should be able to ... Ah, damn!"

Carnival's mouth closes on Joker's cock so suddenly and with such impetus that the other has to grab the couch to avoid falling.

"Carnival! What ..?!"

Arthur can't finish asking his question because Carnival is suddenly on him. Quickly swallow his manhood until it is completely lost inside his mouth. Arthur puts his hand to his mouth to drown a shameful shriek.

It doesn't last long. Carnival suddenly withdraws. A smile from ear to ear on his lips.

"What the hell..?!"

Joker puts his hand to his crotch. His cock already missing the wet cavity.

"I had to be sure!" Carnival answers cheerfully to the question that neither has been able to ask.

"The eyes can fool you. First I thought about the length, but then I remembered that the width is also important. When you are inside me, you both feel huge ..."

Again, Arthur put his hand in his mouth to contain a groan.

"Then it occurred to me that the only way to be sure enough was that. When I put you in my mouth I could know .."

"And?"

Joker does nothing to hide his visible excitement. His body reacting instinctively to Carnival's words.

"Well, you both feel big in my mouth. But with one I feel I can't take it that far because I can't breathe .."

Both Joker and Arthur watch him closely. The tension could be cut with a knife until ..

"Joker."

Joker celebrates dancing with his pelvis back and forth. It is his characteristic dance, but being naked the situation is as obscene as it is absurd. Carnival looks pleadingly at Arthur trying to apologize while the other tries to downplay the matter. They are like this for a while until Joker suddenly stops.

"Wait."

Arthur and Carnival focus their attention on him.

"We still have to know your size."

He says addressing Carnival.

"You're always trying to cover yourself. If I'm different from Arthur, maybe you are too ..."

Carnival can feel the heat rise to his cheeks.

"No, I'm not sure about that. I .." He mutters visibly distressed, holding one of the cushions.

"Oh yes! It's very important, you know. We should go to the bedroom to check it out .."

Arthur swallows dry but nods to agree. All that talk about sizes had made all three excited. Carnival sighs, goodbye to his intentions to continue rehearsing.

"You're overreacting."

Arthur tried to cheer him up by patting him on his back. Joker was sitting on the edge of the bed. His head in his hands, shaking again and again.

"It doesn't make sense! Why the hell is he the one who has to have it bigger?!"

His love session had finally revealed a truth that had surprised everyone. Joker was still trying to assimilate it.

"He's a party clown! He works with children! What the hell were you thinking when you created him, Arthur ?!"

A few steps away, Carnival was looking at himself in the mirror. His smile was contagious. Arthur tries to suppress a laugh without much success. Joker's reaction was too funny not to laugh. Definitely, next time he would keep his mouth shut.

End

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My name is Carnival

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x Joker x Carnival

Summary: Carnival always gets scared when Joker shouts. Most of the time the shouts are not even directed at him, but that doesn’t matter. Carnival ends up hiding in some corner of the apartment and it is Arthur’s job to eventually get him out of there. Or how Arthur’s different personalities deal with each other.

Feral

Carnival preferred not to interact with Joker more than strictly necessary. Fortunately, the other seemed to share his same desire since he rarely spoke to him.

When Arthur slept, he opted to retreat to one of the armchairs and remained silent until he woke up. Joker, on the other hand, used to watch television or read a newspaper. In contrast to the two of them, he never slept. Carnival believed that maybe that's why he was always angry.

“I know you told Arthur that I don't like children.”

Carnival takes a moment to realize that he was talking to him. Stirring uncomfortably in the chair, he nervously observes Arthur who was still resting. That sounded like a reproach and he didn't want to have to deal with Joker alone. Raising his feet on the couch, he hugs his legs in a protective gesture. Joker continues, appearing to be oblivious to this.

“You're right. I don´t like them. Arthur thinks he knows some things about me but doesn´t understand everything.” He exhales a puff of smoke without taking his eyes off the TV.

“However, you ..”

He looked at him with that strange expression and Carnival hugged himself more strongly.

“Do do you want to know why I don't like them?”

Although Joker maintained a pleasant tone there was something in his smile. Something in the way of raising the corner of his lips that made him seem feral. Carnival quickly shakes his head fearing to irritate him if he didn't answer.

“I don't like them because every time I see a child I remember what they did to you in that alley and then I feel I can't control myself.”

More on:https://archiveofourown.org/works/21561610/chapters/51403504

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My name is Carnival

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x Joker x Carnival 

Summary: Carnival always gets scared when Joker shouts. Most of the time the shouts are not even directed at him, but that doesn't matter. Carnival ends up hiding in some corner of the apartment and it is Arthur's job to eventually get him out of there. Or how Arthur's different personalities deal with each other.

Chapter 2: Ukelele

Carnival knows how to play the ukelele. In fact, he does it very well. He is proud of his little ability and likes to use it to cheer Arthur up when he has had a bad day.

However now, since Joker lives with them, he is afraid of using his instrument for fear of disturbing him. Joker is always sitting on the couch watching the news with a cigarette in his hand.

He doesn't like the news. He gets bored. He prefers Mr. Chaplin's movies. Someday he would like to be like him. Maybe, if he were funny enough and made money from it, Arthur would no longer need Joker to live with them and everything would be as it was before. Only both.

Carnival sighs. If he wanted that, he would have to be a much better clown than he is now and that would only be achieved in one way: working hard.

That is why that day he decides to face his fears and dares to take the little ukelele out of his bag of belongings. He must tune it first. Giving a nervous look at the living room where Joker sits, he rehearses some chords. The nerves before a possible reprisal grip his fingers, but with the thought of Arthur's happiness he manages to overcome his insecurities.

Soon, they are just his instrument and he. The notes follow one another with versatility and he feels flowing so much with the music that closes his eyes.

It's like this for a few moments until the sound of applause distracts him.

When he open his eyes, his confusion cannot be greater. Because it's not Arthur who cheers him from the doorframe but Joker.

Joker, who looks at him with an expression mixes fun and something else that he cannot finish placing, but that worries him even more than if he had yelled at him.

More on: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21561610/chapters/51403504

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LOVE IT !!!!

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the real glow up was when he stopped using lip liner

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Joker special features (7 / ???)