silver-hwaberry
silver-hwaberry
☆ 8M1T ☆
172 posts
🎀 35 years old | atiny | adhd | studying criminal law and forensics 🎀
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
Text
⭑I Can See You⭑
THREE: secret messages
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Warnings: angst, online bullying, body shaming, arguing, mental health struggles, brief mention of a suicide attempt but no explicit details, excessive drinking, mentions of company manipulation and mistreatment
Word count: 11.9k
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⭑2016⭑
The day of Moonlight's comeback had arrived, and as expected, Yeonghwa was absent from school. Without her, class felt dull, and Yunho occasionally glanced at the empty seat next to him. However, he concentrated on his studies, eagerly counting down the minutes until lunchtime when he could finally watch her music video for "Cosmic Rush." He had enjoyed the teaser clips and concept photos that had been released. Although he had already heard the song and seen the choreography, he was excited to watch the full music video.
The second the school bell rang out and everyone started packing their books, he pulled out his phone and opened his YouTube app. His fingers desperately searching for the music video. A massive smile coming to his face when he sees Yeonghwa is the thumbnail for it. Her white hair with pastel streaks, pink and silver gemstones on her face beside her eyes.
As the music video begins to play, it starts with each member having solo shots of them walking down a darkened street with a dulled down instrumental of the song playing. Haneul is first, then Jinni, Misty and Areum before Yeonghwa comes on the screen and for the first time in his life Yunhos heart races so fast and hard he can feel it beating against his chest, he swears it is about to burst out his chest. Each of their outfits for the opening shots are different but it suits their own styles. Yeonghwa is wearing short white dress with a black corset on top of it, her hair is styled in loose waves. The only thing that is the same for each member is the gemstones beside their eyes. The bands name flashes on the screen and the song fully kicks in.
Yunhos captivated from the start. His eyes on Yeonghwa on every scene she is in. The tone of the music video is a night time theme with lots of stars, moons and sparkles which fits their overall band concept well. There is some stunning shots of Japanese landscape. Seeing the whole choreography together with all 5 members and their outfits, it looked even more spectacular than when Yeonghwa taught him it in the private practice room.
All 5 looked amazing but Yunho was just in awe over Yeonghwa effortlessly dancing, her powerful dance moves and emotive facial expressions. Even when sharing the scene with 4 other people she commanded it.
As the dance break begins he find himself mimicking the dance moves she taught him with his arms and upper body as he sat on his seat. All 5 members are in perfect sync with one another but the signature move of the backwards handstand into splits was Yeonghwas solo move as the 4 members stood around her, as she gets to her feet they continues the rest of the choreography together to the end.
When the final notes faded out and the screen goes black, Yunho sits motionless for a few moments, processing what he had just watched. His heart is still racing but has calmed down slightly. He feels a sense of pride for Yeonghwas performance on the video, she looked amazing, her dance moves were flawless and her rap solos were jaw dropping while her backing vocals on the track were noticeable.
The entire performance was incredible, showcasing the effort each member had invested. However, Yunho feels especially proud of Yeonghwa, knowing how she had juggled her schoolwork and additional solo commitments while working tirelessly for this comeback.
He is so excited for the upcoming music show performances of it now, the first one being aired in a few hours. Although he had a dance practice scheduled after school, San - a huge fan of Moonlight, had mentioned he would watch the performance during a break, so Yunho intended to join him. They were also going to meet the new potential trainee.
It was going to be a busy evening but he felt a jolt of motivation to work harder. He looked up at the clock and quickly realised he had to go to Mingis school for their usual lunch and he had spent 10 minutes of his 1 hour lunch break staring at his phone and thinking of Yeonghwa.
“Shit!” he mumbles pushing his school books into his bag and running out the classroom, praying Mingi wouldn’t be annoyed at him running late.
As he runs outside the building, he slips on the light snow that had started to fall during the morning. It was nearly the end of November and the weather had turned cold quickly. Yunho had been so focused on school work and making sure he made diligent notes for Yeonghwa too that he hadn’t noticed the snow begin from the window beside his desk. He pulls his blazer tighter around his body as the cold hits him. Instantly regretting not taking his coat with him that morning, however most of his things were now packed as he and the other trainees were moving into their dorm that in a couple of days.
Yunho moved from Gwangju to Seoul after transferring to the Seoul dance academy, where he met Mingi. Though initially in separate branches, they became fast friends during joint meetings. So Yunho seized the chance to move to Seoul when he was offered a transfer. He had wanted to be closer to Mingi but also to be in a city with more opportunities to do what he loved and live with his grandparents. Earlier that year, he auditioned for KQ and was pleasantly surprised to find Mingi there too. They both knew they were going to auditions but neither said for which company so it was a happy surprise when Mingi walked into the training room that day!
Initially, it was just Hongjoong, Yunho, and Mingi, but San soon joined then. His next goal was to apply for SOPA and was overjoyed to be accepted into the program as he had wanted to train there for years. With Seonghwa recruited and a potential new trainee, Yunho was pleased when the CEO announced they would have a dorm.
Yunho had loved living with his grandparents and getting to spend that time with them but he also could not wait for dorm life. It meant they could all bond better, their day schedules would be separate as they all attended different schools but when it came to coming and going from practice they would be together now.
“Where were you?” Mingis deep voice booms across the small cafe as Yunho eventually runs into it.
“Sorry, I was… uh.. held up after class.” he replies falling into the seat opposite his friend who has already ordered
Yunho didn't want to admit to Mingi that his tardiness was due to watching Moonlight's music video. He hadn't shared his friendship with her with anyone yet, not even his grandparents. He could picture Hongjoongs disapproving look at Yunho being friends with a girl, San was a huge Moonlight fan and would likely lose his cool if he found out, but Yunho also felt she deserved her privacy. Even though Yunho had repeatedly suggested that Yeonghwa join him and Mingi for lunch, he hadn't revealed to Mingi the identity of his new friend at SOPA, leaving Mingi unaware. If Yeonghwa decides to join them, Yunho would inform Mingi about her identity and make him promise to keep it a secret. Until then, Yunho intended to stay silent.
“Well I ordered food.” Mingi replies pointing to the food laden table, “And I don’t want to hear any shit about you paying me back! It is the least I can do when you drag your ass all the way over here everyday just so I don’t have to eat alone.”
“You know I don’t mind it.” Yunho says
“Guess it beats eating lunch with the asshole SOPA crowds!” Mingi laughs
Yunho feels his stomach lurch. While Mingi is slightly correct, most of the students at the school were in fact assholes there were a few ones who weren’t. Yeonghwa being the main one, but during her days away from school he had made somewhat acquaintances with some of the other fellow trainees. He didn’t want to hang around with them the way he did with Yeonghwa though.
Everyone was wary of her, there wasn’t one person who liked her except Yunho. Most made inappropriate comments, while others kept their distance, intimidated by her idol status or misconceptions about her. Many thought she was egotistical and spoiled, without any proof but the majority were jealous she was already achieving what they wanted. In reality, Yunho found her to be the opposite: genuinely kind, caring, and inquisitive about his life and training. She wasn't spoiled or bossy at all.
When they were alone, she felt at ease, and her voice shifted away from what Yunho thought of as the 'Aria voice.' Her natural tone was deeper, similar to her rapping voice. As Aria, however, she used a high-pitched, almost childlike tone, a result of years of extensive coaching to make her sound cuter. Around him, her Jeolla dialect, which matched his own, emerged more frequently, evoking memories of home for him.
Deep down he could see how she longed to be ‘normal’, to be treated like a regular person and not some circus freak. He noticed the people in class and around the school looking at her, whispering, taking sneaky photos of her and he saw the pain in her eyes whenever it happened. She never said anything or complained, but he could see it upset her, which is why he often used his height a lot of the time in an attempt to shield her from it as much as he could.
“So Hongjoong called me this morning before I left for school…” Mingi says with a mouthful of noodles
“Oh?” Yunho responds, pulling his thoughts away from Yeonghwa, “He didn’t call me.”
“He tried but your grandmother told him you had already left for school early. Anyway he wants a meeting as soon as we all arrive at the company after school. Something about this new potential trainee coming tonight.” he answers, “He wants us all on our best behaviour! ‘Just act like normal human beings for once in your lives and not your weird selves!’” he adds imitating Hongjoong while scrunching his face
“Probably!” Yunho laughs loudly nearly spitting out his food "Hongjoong really does think we're a bunch of wild animals.”
“I mean, is he wrong?” Mingi shrugs his shoulders "Remember when San tried to do that back flip off the practice room couch and nearly broke the couch?"
Yunho chokes on his drink. "Or when Hongjoong found you hiding in the storage closet eating ramen at 1 AM during that overnight practice. Your face was priceless," he laughs. "You looked like a raccoon caught digging through trash."
"Hey! I was starving! That tiny hyung had us practising for six hours straight!" Mingi defends himself, pointing his chopsticks accusingly. "Not all of us can survive on determination and spite like him."
Yunho wipes his mouth, still chuckling. "I swear he's part robot. I've never seen him actually sleep."
"Who needs sleep when you can compose?" Mingi mimics Hongjoong's serious face before breaking into a grin. "So, any idea who this new trainee might be?"
Yunho shrugs, pushing his food around. "No clue. Just hope they're not another perfectionist. We've got enough of that with Seonghwa and Hongjoong."
"God, can you imagine? Three of them?" Mingi groans dramatically, clutching his chest. "I'd never get away with leaving my socks on the floor again."
"You shouldn't be doing that anyway, you nasty bas-"
"Like you're any better!" Mingi cuts him off. "I've seen your room at your grandparents. It looks like a clothing bomb went off."
Yunho's ears turns red. "That's... different. I was packing."
"For three months?" Mingi raises an eyebrow. “Lets just hope you are cleaner when we move into the dorm this weekend.”
"Shut up and eat your food," Yunho mutters, kicking him under the table.
Mingi winces but keeps his shit-eating grin. "So how's the fancy school treating you? Made any friends besides this mysterious lunch-ditcher you keep mentioning?"
"It's... fine. You know how it is. Everyone's too busy trying to be the next big thing."
"Except you, obviously," Mingi teases. "You're just tall."
"Can't help genetics," Yunho shot back. "Unlike you, who needs platform shoes to reach the top shelf."
"I do NOT wear platform-" Mingi starts indignantly, then caught Yunho's smirk. "Asshole."
"Takes one to know one."
Yunho checks his phone, trying to be subtle, but Mingi caught him.
"Waiting for something? Or someone?" Mingi wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
"Just checking the time," Yunho lies, quickly pocketing his phone. He'd been checking to see if Moonlight's video had gained anymore views yet.
"Sure, sure," Mingi drawls. "Anyway, Hongjoong told me to tell you to go straight to the company after school, ‘fed up of that boy always being late after school!’."
Yunho blushes slightly, the reason it takes him longer than usual to get to the company is he liked to wait with Yeonghwa until her manager picked her up. She usually waited until everyone had left before she went out in an attempt to avoid the crowds and he didn’t like leaving her alone in the classroom. “The buses from the school are always full, I need to wait like 7 buses before I can get on one!” he lies
“You wouldn’t want to miss Hongjoongs all important meeting!” Mingi continues
"Or the Moonlight performance," Yunho blurts before he could stop himself.
Mingi pauses mid-bite. "You follow them too? I thought San and Seonghwa were the only ones with the girl group obsession."
"I don't… I mean… they're just really good dancers," Yunho stammers, feeling his face heat up. "Professional research, you know?"
"Uh-huh," Mingi nods slowly, a mischievous smile spreading across his face. "Professional. Research. Got it."
"Fuck off," Yunho mutters, throwing a napkin at Mingi's face. "So, uh... what do you think the company has planned for us this weekend when we move into the dorm?" he asks, hoping to steer Mingi's teasing away
"Not sure," Mingi shrugs, popping a piece of meat into his mouth. "I do know that Seonghwa will have us deep cleaning the entire dorm though and probably have a cleaning schedule made up too! You’ve seen how bad he is in the dance practice room, imagine what he is like at home!”
“To be honest that wouldn’t be a bad thing, we are all pretty messy and probably need someone to keep on our asses about being clean.” Yunho says finishing up his food
“He really is obsessed with the cleaning. Did you see him cleaning the mirrors yesterday? He looked horrified at how dirty the water was after the first wipe.” Mingi laughs
“Can you blame him? I don’t think those mirrors in the practice room have ever been cleaned! I know none of us has!” he replies
“That’s true!” Mingi nods
As Yunho and Mingi finish their lunch, they part ways, promising to meet up at the company later. Yunho checks his phone one last time before putting it away. The video has surpassed 10 million views in just 4 hours! He feels a surge of pride for Yeonghwa and her group, and he can’t resist any longer.
Yunho: Hey Yeong! Congrats on the music video hitting 10M!! The MV is so good, you nailed that choreo! I’ll be watching the comeback performance later on. Fighting!!
He knows she’ll be too busy to check her phone but wanted to let her know that he watched the video and loved it.
The rest of his school day goes by quickly and before he knows it he is stepping on to the bus to the company building. As he finds a seat at the back and settles into it, Yunho pulls out his phone again, refreshing Moonlight's page. The number had continued to climb steadily - 12.5 million now! He smiles proudly to himself as he reads through the comments but his smile fades when he reads one -
‘that company clearly favours Aria. Making her the thumbnail when her performance this comeback was so shit!’
He goes on to read more comments.
‘Her dancing was a mess, rapping was awful, and her outfits?! Disgusting!!’
‘She gained so much weight. Are the stylists blind? How could they even think of squeezing her fat ass into those tight outfits?!’
‘I hope she falls on her ass during the performances, they should have gave that dance move to someone who can pull it off like Misty.’
‘You can tell her bandmates fucking hate her.’
Yunho clenches his fists, his knuckles turning white as he stares at the cruel comments attacking Yeonghwa. A surge of protective rage floods through him, his heart aching for his friend who didn't deserve this vicious bullying.
"That's it, I've had enough of this crap," Yunho mutters under his breath, jabbing at his phone screen with a vengeance. He began furiously typing out a scathing retort to the vile commenters:
‘How dare you critique Aria’s weight and appearance like that?! She's a talented, hardworking idol who pours her heart into every performance. Her body is none of your damn business! She is a minor and you are an adult talking about her body! And her dancing was on point - you obviously have no clue what you're talking about if you think she messed up. Aria is an integral part of Moonlight and her bandmates clearly love her. You're just pathetic trolls spewing nasty personal attacks because you have nothing better to do with your life. Grow up and get a hobby that doesn't involve bullying idols.’
Satisfied with his scathing riposte, Yunho hits send before pausing. He knows Yeonghwa reads comments on videos. After her strict no eating policy in the lead up to the comeback, he knew the weight comments would hit her the hardest and he also had a feeling her company was harder on her because of them. It was madness to him as she was so petite naturally and a lot slimmer in person than he had realised.
The day in the private practice room when she nearly fell over and he instinctively held onto her waist to steady her, his hands easy fit around it, his fingers almost connecting on either side and he felt her hip bones. Yunho was already concerned about her restricting her food intake for the upcoming comeback, but he worried that reading negative comments could have a more lasting impact on her. Knowing she often read comments about the band, he hoped she would encounter the supportive words from genuine Moonlight fans and realise that not everyone believed the harsh rumours about her. He begins to report every negative comment he can see for the rest of the journey.
As Yunho exits the bus, he feels lighter knowing he had stood up for his friend in a some small way. His company building comes into view as he rounds the corner and he spots San squatting down to tie his shoelaces. His giant backpack almost completely hiding his small frame. Yunho sneaks up behind him and as San stands up, he grabs his waist and shouts ‘boo’ causing the young boy to scream loudly.
San's scream echoes through the small street, causing several passersby to turn their heads. He whips around, clutching his chest dramatically.
"What the actual fuck, Yunho?!" San gasps, eyes wide. "I think my soul just left my body!"
Yunho doubles over with laughter, slapping his knee. "Your face! Oh my god, your face!"
"Yeah, laugh it up," San grumbles, adjusting his backpack. "See if I share my snacks with you during practice."
"Aw, come on," Yunho says, throwing an arm around San's shoulders. "Your screams are like music to my ears."
Yunho had bonded instantly with San when he joined the company, he felt a sense of protectiveness over the young boy. He was petite in size, had a baby face despite only being a couple of months younger than Yunho, had an innocent outlook on the world and he could barely dance but his vocals were out of this world. However, San always worked harder and longer than everyone on his dancing to make up for it and both Yunho, Hongjoong and Mingi could see the determination and potential in him so Yunho made it his mission to help him with the dancing aspect.
"I hate you so much right now." San shrugs off Yunho's arm, but there's a small smile tugging at his lips.
“I know you love me!” Yunho grins in response
They walk through the entrance of the small building, scanning their trainee ID cards.
"So," San says with a mischievous look creeping on his face, "Mingi texted me that you're a secret Moonlight fan? Interesting development."
Yunho nearly trips over his own feet. "What? No… I mean… it's not like that."
"Your phone screen is literally still open to their YouTube page," San points out, gesturing to the phone in Yunho's hand. “Which you better hide before Hongjoong sees it!”
“Shit!” Yunho quickly shoves his phone into his pocket. "I was just... appreciating their choreography."
"Mm-hmm, and I'm just 'appreciating' Mistys vocals," San air-quotes with a smirk. "Come on, admit it! You've fallen into the Moonlight black hole just like me and Seonghwa hyung."
"You're delusional," Yunho mutters, pressing the elevator button with more force than necessary.
"Says the guy who just wrote a novel-length defence of Aria in the YouTube comments," San retorts, leaning against the wall with a knowing look.
Yunho freezes. "How did you-"
"I follow the comments section like a hawk," San shrugs. "Plus, your username is literally 'JYunho99.' Not exactly incognito, genius."
The elevator doors open, and Yunho steps in, wishing he could disappear into the floor. "Those comments were bullshit. They don't know what they're talking about."
San's teasing expression softens. "Hey, I get it. The hate she gets is ridiculous. I've been reporting those comments all morning during lessons."
“Really?” Yunho asks surprised
"Of course! Moonlight deserves better than that toxic crap," San says earnestly. "Especially Aria. Did you see that backwards handstand into splits she did? Absolutely insane."
Yunho can't help the smile that spreads across his face. "Yeah, it was pretty awesome."
"‘Pretty awesome’? It was god-tier!" San exclaims, bouncing on his toes. "I've been trying to figure out how she does it without breaking her spine. My back hurts just thinking about it."
"You'd need years of practice and probably some superhuman flexibility," Yunho says, remembering how Yeonghwa had patiently taught the technique to him until he had mastered it.
"Or black magic," San nods seriously. "I'm leaning toward black magic."
The elevator dings, and they step out onto their practice floor.
"By the way," San says, lowering his voice as they approach the practice room, "I set an alarm to watch their music show comeback stage later. Wanna join?"
"Already planning on it," Yunho admits.
San's face lights up. “It will be so good to have another Stardust around!”
“Who is a Stardust?” Seonghwa voice comes suddenly from behind them
“Yunho!” San grins, “He has saw the light with Moonlight and decided to join the Stardust fandom!” Yunho can feel his ears turning red once more, “He also already has a bias!”
“San!” Yunho groans as the three of them walk into dance practice room to see Mingi and Hongjoong already there
“Oh who is it?” Seonghwa asks excited, “No, let me guess!! Is it Jinni?!”
“Nope!” San shakes his head
"Areum?" Seonghwa guesses again, leaning against the practice room mirror.
"Not even close," San snickers, dropping his backpack on the floor.
"Oh come on," Yunho groans, "can we not do this right now?"
"Do what?" Hongjoong asks, looking up from his notebook where he'd been scribbling what looked like lyrics.
"Yunho's got a thing for Aria from Moonlight." San answers
"I do not have a 'thing'!" Yunho protests, his voice cracking embarrassingly. "I just think she's talented… they all are!"
“Helps that she is cute, adorable, full of aegyo, pocket sized and koreas princess!” Mingi says with a massive grin on his face
“Oh could you imagine the two of them side by side! She is so tiny and he is so tall, they’d look cute together!” Seonghwa grins
Yunho can feel his ears getting hot and red. Little did they know he has been side by side with her multiple times and her small height compared to him is one of the things he likes most.
"Plus he wrote an essay defending her honour in the YouTube comments," San adds, taking off his school tie.
Seonghwa's eyebrows shoot up. "Oh? Our Yunho, getting into fan wars online?"
"It wasn't a fan war," Yunho mutters, dropping his bag and avoiding everyone's eyes. "People were being assholes."
“Wait.. how were you able to write in the comments?” Hongjoong asks Yunho his eyebrows lowering before he looks over at San, “And how did you know?”
Yunho and San exchange silent glances at one another. Neither of them can reveal their secret phones to him or he’ll take them away.
“School computers!” San replies with a nonchalant shrug
Hongjoong closes his notebook with a snap. "As fascinating as Yunho's idol crush is-"
"It's not a crush!"
"-we have more important things to discuss," Hongjoong continues, ignoring Yunho's interruption. "The new trainee is coming soon, and I need you all to behave like functioning human beings for once."
"Define 'functioning'," San smirks.
"No screaming, no weird jokes, no random dance battles, no talking of excessive cleaning routines, and for god's sake, no one mention the time Mingi got stuck in the bathroom stall," Hongjoong lists off, pointing at each of them in turn.
"The lock was faulty!" Mingi protests
"Anyway," Hongjoong cuts in before they can derail further, "this kid could be our future member, and we really want him so first impressions matter."
“Do we know much about him?” Seonghwa asks
“All I know is that he is coming from Big Hit, I don’t know the reason why he is leaving them but there are many companies competing for him so he is a big deal!” Hongjoong says, “If we can show him he’d be a great fit here then we have a chance of him picking us.”
“But if there are so many companies after him, why would he pick an unknown small one like us?” Yunho asks
“It is true these bigger ones have more advantages and opportunities than us but what we can do is give him the attention to learn and become who he wants to. Less people means more attention for what the individual needs.” he answers, “So we need to be welcoming and professional, show him we are serious about this and him.”
“So, to recap - Yunho is a secret Stardust with a crush on the maknae,” San begins as Yunho rolls his eyes while he takes off his yellow SOPA blazer, “Mingi claims the lock was faulty in the bathroom which is how he got locked in there for nearly an hour, and we’ve to be normal!”
“Pretty much.” Hongjoong replies, “Now lets get changed and warm up for this practice, he will be here in an hour.”
They all make their way to the changing room. Yunho catches himself checking the time on the wall clock, it was 2 hours until Moonlight's first performance for this comeback. He was hoping that he could watch it live and not on a replay.
As Yunho enters the changing room, he feels his phone buzzing in his pocket. He swiftly heads to the restroom, locks the door, and takes out his phone. A broad smile spreads across his face when he sees the hamster emoji on his message notification, his hidden contact name for Yeonghwa.
Yeonghwa: ‘I’ll work extra harder on todays performance, show everyone the best side of me.’
Yunho knows shes read the comments online and his heart drops. He stares at the phone, wondering how to respond when he sees she is currently typing something. He waits with batted breathe for her message to come through as he hears Hongjoong tell Mingi to stop messing around and get changed, knowing he will be getting scolded next he quickly changes out of his school clothes and into sweats when the message pops up.
Yeonghwa: ‘And thank you for your message.’ Yunho: You will do well. San, Seonghwa and I will be watching and cheering you on!’
“Lets go everyone!” Hongjoong shouts
Yunho stares at his phone, his thumbs hovering over the keyboard debating sending a second message.
Yunho: ‘I missed you today.’
He sends before quickly adding
Yunho: ‘at school I mean!’
His heart is racing at his impulsive actions. He can feel beads of sweat gather on his brow as he rereads what he just wrote.
Yeonghwa: ‘I miss you too…’
His heart skips a beat as he stares at his phone,
Yeonghwa: ‘at school.’
Yunho's cheeks heat up as he stares at the message, his stomach doing a weird flip. Was she flirting? Was he flirting? Were they both just being friendly? He has no idea, but he can't stop smiling like an idiot.
“Yunho, now!!” Hongjoong shouts again, “Unless you’ve pulled a Mingi and gotten yourself locked in there!”
“Yah!” comes Mingis loud voice from the hallway, “The lock was faulty!!”
“I’ll be a second!” he shouts back as Hongjoong mumbles something before walking out, leaving the changing room now empty
Yunho grins at his phone, fingers tapping rapidly.
Yunho: 'Good luck on your performance. Knock 'em dead (but not literally, that would be bad for your reputation)'
Three dots appear immediately.
Yeonghwa: 'Thanks. My manager is glaring at me. Gotta go soon to get my makeup done. They're putting actual CRYSTALS on my face. The glue they use for stage performance is brutal! Pray for my skin!!' Yunho: 'RIP your pores. Fighting!' Yeonghwa: 'What are you doing right now?' Yunho: 'About to do dance practice. New potential trainee coming to interview. Hongjoong's having a meltdown.' Yeonghwa: ‘That is normal. It is like a requirement for leaders to be having a meltdown. Haneul has had 7 so far today…. wait make that 8, she’s just spilled water on her top! Manager-nim is no longer glaring at me now! haha’
Yunho laughs loudly before clamping his hand over his mouth to muffle the sound then sees more dots appear.
Yeonghwa: 'Make sure you stretch properly before practice. Don't want you pulling something before our next dance session.'
His heart does that stupid flutter thing again.
Yunho: 'Aww, are you worried about me?' Yeonghwa: ‘Just don't want to waste my teaching skills on an injured pupil.'
Yunho's thumbs hover over the keyboard. Yunho: 'I'll be extra careful then. Can't disappoint my favourite dance teacher.' Yeonghwa: 'Smart boy. Better than all those SOPA kids who can't tell their left from right.'
The bathroom door rattles suddenly, making Yunho nearly drop his phone as he hadn’t heard anyone come back into the changing area.
"Yunho-ya!" Seonghwa's voice calls through the door. "Hongjoong's about to blow a gasket. Are you alive in there?"
"Yeah, just… uh… stomach issues!" Yunho calls back, wincing at his lame excuse.
He can practically hear Seonghwa's eyeroll. "Well, hurry up. Staff member has just said the new kid's just arrived. CEO changed his appointment time and didn’t bother telling us."
"Shit, really?" Yunho says, his heart jumping for a different reason now
“Yeah, Hongjoong is freaking so come on so he can give us another pep talk on acting normal before we meet the guy.” Seonghwa says before leaving the changing room,
Yunho quickly sends one last text.
Yunho: 'Gotta run! New guys here early. I’ll try to message you tonight when I get home… let you know what you missed at school today.’ Yeonghwa: ‘Good luck with the new guy! Remember to stretch properly and drink lots of water! oh and eat a banana afterwards! Training, fighting!!’
With a smile and a final look at the messages, Yunho tucks it back into his bag, feeling a renewed sense of determination and motivation. As he exits the changing room and goes back to the practice hall, he knows that no matter how busy their lives may be, their connection will always be a source of strength and support between one another. With a sense of contentment, he looks forward to the moments they will share, both in person and through their messages, knowing that their friendship is only growing with each passing day.
⭑2020⭑
A week has passed since the award show. Yeonghwa had managed to get Yunhos number via her manager who knew someone who knew one of Ateezs managers. ‘It was a whole who-knows-who thing!’ her manager had laughed when she handed the number over to Yeonghwa.
She attempted to text him several times to set up the coffee meeting, but each time her thumb lingered over the 'send' button, a surge of nausea would wash over her, prompting her to delete the message. Was she truly ready to let him back into her life? What if the coffee meeting turned into a disaster? Or even more complicated, what if it went smoothly and everything became chaotic?
After she walked out of his dorm that night, Yunhos excruciating sobs ringing in her ears, his heartbroken face burned into her brain, and Mingis words hitting her hard, she walked to Han River. She craved a moment of solitude before returning to her own dorm to face her roommates. The thought of their disappointed and judgmental looks was unbearable. However, as she stood on the bridge gazing at the water, the weight of her actions struck her hard—the harsh words she uttered and the pain she inflicted became all too real.
The water below had appeared so serene that she almost envied it, and before she realised it, she had scaled the railing. In a matter of seconds, she was forcibly pulled back and slammed onto the concrete ground by a man who pinned her down, shouting at her. She couldn't hear his words, it felt like she was in the water, drowning, everything was muffled but she knew it was her manager. His rough handling of her left a cut on her cheek and bruises on her arms and legs, which only angered her company further. They belittled her for being reckless and for creating additional work for the makeup artists who now had to conceal her injuries. Instead of showing concern for her mental state or attempting to help her after her actions, their primary worry was how it affected them.
Afterwards, Yeonghwa buried her pain deep inside, locking it away securely. She understood that she couldn't allow herself to think about him again, fearing she might repeat her past actions. Her bandmates were supportive, though their reactions differed to the situation with Yunho. Haneul and Jinni were annoyed that she had gotten involved with someone, while Areum and Misty showed her compassion. Despite their differing views on the situation, all four agreed that Yeonghwa needed help, and if the company wouldn't provide it, they would step in. They kept a close watch on her, ensuring she was never left alone. Although she realised their intentions were well-meaning, she felt suffocated—caught between the company, her well meaning bandmates and keeping her pain at bay.
Initially it was easy for Yeonghwa to put her feelings aside, the company had took away her phone so if had tried to contact her she wasn’t seeing any of it, she didn’t see him anymore as they’d both graduated school and she was busy with work. But then all that was ruined when one night in the company building as she was rehearsing for an upcoming solo schedule she had, Yunhos voice floated through the quiet corridor, his hearty laugh and her heart fluttered and her legs nearly gave out.
It had been months since she last heard him, heard his infectious laughter and she had quickly followed the noise. Her body unconsciously seeking him out, down the corridor and into a small room. There she saw some staff members watching TV and there he was. Dancing in a practice room at KQ with Hongjoong and Mingi, a room that Yeonghwa had visited a couple of times. That was the night she learned that he was preparing to debut and they had filmed a show about it called Code Name is Ateez.
She struggled to suppress her feelings and, instead of practicing, found herself searching for details of Ateez's debut and watching their dance videos online. She couldn't resist watching him dance, feeling proud of his solo performance and their upcoming debut, but an unbearable pain struck her, and she dropped her iPad. He was no longer in that box. In the following weeks, she tried to move on, but on the debut day, she secretly watched their performance and music video. Hidden in the closet, she cried tears of happiness and pain.
Every new music video, every comeback, she followed it all. She was so happy that he, and his fellow members had finally debuted and were slowly doing well in the industry but it made her long for him once more and those feelings she’d buried deep were coming back again. Her members could see her inner turmoil and tried to be around her more, keeping a very close eye on her mental wellbeing. None of them wanted her going back to that dark place again. Misty and Areum were the only ones to know she was watching every performance though.
It wasn’t until award season of 2019/2020 that they finally came to be in the same room. She tried not to look at him, especially infront of eagle eyed fans who filmed everything. Just a glance in a male idols direction can cause a scandal and she did well until the award show last week when Ateez and Moonlight were seated side by side.
“Ya, what you doing?” a voice from behind her causes her to jump and drop her phone on the hardwood floor
“Misty!!!” Yeonghwa growls picking it up
“Just text him!” she replies sinking onto the floor beside her
Yeonghwa had yet another message typed out to send him and had spent the past few minutes staring at it. She had been so focused on the device in her hand and the memories of Yunho holding her hand, remembering all over again how tiny her hand was in his, his forehead pressed against hers from the week before that she hadn’t even heard Misty enter the empty dance practice room.
"Text who?" Yeonghwa asks, pretending to be clueless.
"You know, that very tall and handsome guy from the rookie group who was eyeing you last week," Misty responds with a mischievous grin.
"I have no clue who or what you're even referring to!" Yeonghwa retorts, deleting the message and locking her phone before stretching her arms above her head.
“Don’t try to play dumb with me Hwa!” she says as she begins her own stretching routine, “Areum told me about your little rendezvous with Yunho.”
“Shut up!” Yeonghwa snaps her head to look at her, “Don’t say that! Haneul will fucking kill me if she knew!”
"I haven't told her, and Areum won't either. Jinni's in the dark too. So relax!" Misty says, her teasing tone quickly disappearing as she notices the fear in Yeonghwa's eyes. "Want to tell me how it went when you talked to him again?"
"Weird," Yeonghwa replies, tugging at a loose thread on her leggings. "It was awkward at first, but then we slipped back into our old ways so quickly. The banter we used to have, him teasing me about my height, and me doing the same to him..." A small smile appears on Yeonghwa's face, mirrored by Misty, who is pleased to see her younger friend looking happy. But then Yeonghwa's smile fades. "Then he asked me out for coffee."
“Coffee?” Misty asks, stretching her legs and leaning forwards between them so her chest was flat on the floor
"'Just as friends... no pressure!'" Yeonghwa says, using air quotes to mimic Yunho's words.
“And what did you say?”
“Well after trying hard to resist, I ended up agreeing to one coffee.” she sighs
“One coffee?”
“ONE coffee!” Yeonghwa shoots her a look, “Then Mingi showed up.”
“That fucking dude!” Misty rolls her eyes sitting upright and twisting to the side, “He is such a jerk!”
“Mingi is just… protective of Yunho. I can’t blame him for reacting the way he did.” Yeonghwa sighs
“And how exactly did he react?” Misty raises an eyebrow, her jaw tightening
Yeonghwa grimaces, picking at her leggings more aggressively now. "He pulled Yunho away from me like I was some kind of disease. Called me a bitch right to my face."
"He fucking what?" Misty's stretching halted immediately, her face contorting with rage. "That lanky piece of-"
"I kind of had it coming," Yeonghwa interrupts, shaking her head. "After what I did to Yunho."
"No, fuck that." Misty was now fully upright, her stretching completely abandoned. "I don't care what happened between you two. That doesn't give Mingi the right to call you names like you're nothing."
Yeonghwa let out a sigh, resting her head against the mirrored wall. "That's not even the worst part."
"What could be worse than-"
"Yunho shoved him."
Misty's jaw drops. "He did what?"
"He physically shoved him. Hard. It looked like they were about to start a fight right there in the hallway." Yeonghwa rakes her fingers through her hair, further disarraying her already messy ponytail. "I've never seen Yunho like that. He was... Oh my God, he was furious. His face was all red and-"
"Shit," Misty mumbles. "What happened next?"
“Hongjoong showed up, thank fuck!” Yeonghwa closes her eyes, the memory still fresh. “He told them both to go back to the waiting room then simply told me to stay away from Yunho.”
“Shit!” Misty repeats, “So you’re telling me..” she scoots closer, “that Yunho, the most calmest man on the planet almost fought his best friend over you!”
“Don’t say it like that!”
"Like what? Like he's still clearly hung up on you?"
Yeonghwa groans. "This is why I can't text him. It's all too messy already. Previous emotions are still too raw."
"Or maybe," Misty nudges her with an elbow, "it's proof you should text him. Yunho's not the fighting type. If he was ready to throw down with his bestie, that coffee date means more to him than just catching up."
"That's exactly what I'm afraid of," Yeonghwa mutters, picking up her phone again. "What if I hurt him again? What if the company finds out? What if-"
“Kim Yeonghwa!!” Misty says firmly, instantly causing her mouth to clamp shut, “Sorry to use your full name but I had to shut you up and stop you from spiralling.”
Yeonghwa swallows hard and nods, taking a deep breath to steady herself.
“Our new company… it isn’t like the old one. That place almost killed you…” her voice falters slightly but she quickly regains her composure, “what they forced you do to Yunho, and to yourself. I hated it. You know I did. We all did.”
Yeonghwa closes her eyes, biting the inside of her lip as painful memories flood her mind.
“They blackmailed you. An innocent teenager. Maybe if you told Yunho he’d underst….”
“No!!” Yeonghwa interrupts firmly “Yunho can never know what our old company did or what they planned to do to him! Never!!”
“But Yeon…”
“I said no Miyeon!” The mention of Mistys Korean name stops her in her tracks. It was rare for her bandmates, or anyone to call her that. Unlike Yeonghwa, she liked her stage name. She knew when someone called her Miyeon, it meant they were serious. “I love you like a sister but I swear to god if you or anyone else tells him the truth, I will hate you and I’ll leave.”
“Okay, I won’t say anymore about that.” Misty nods softly "You're scared, I get it. But sometimes you've got to pull your head out of your ass and just do it."
"Poetic," Yeonghwa mutters before letting out a small laugh
“That is why you and Haneul are the talented songwriters and I am just here to provide a pretty face and some comedy!!” she replies, “But seriously, you’ve spoken to him and he’s spoken to you. If he seriously hated you, he wouldn’t have and he wouldn’t have asked for coffee either and he certainly would not have pushed Mingi.”
"Why is everything so fucking complicated?" she whines, staring up at the ceiling. “What if it blows up in my face? What if he wants to meet so he can just tell me to my face how-”
"What if you stop overthinking for five fucking seconds and just see what happens?" Misty grabs the phone from beside Yeonghwa. "One coffee. That's all you agreed to. Not marriage, not getting back together. Just coffee."
"Hey!" Yeonghwa lunges for it, but Misty rolls away, already typing.
"'Hi you sexy handsome tall man,'" Misty reads aloud as she types, "'I've been staring at my phone for a week trying to work up the nerve to text you but I kept getting distracted when I thought of your face and sexy ass-'"
"I will murder you in your sleep!" Yeonghwa scrambles to her knees, diving at Misty who shrieks and rolls again.
"'-I cannot wait to see you again. How's tomorrow at 2? There's a place near-’"
"MIYEON I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD-" Yeonghwa finally tackles her, wrestling for the phone.
"And... send!" Misty grins triumphantly, holding the phone out of reach.
Yeonghwa freezes. "You didn't."
"I absolutely did."
"Give me my phone." Yeonghwas voice is icy cold as she stares blankly at her member
Misty hands it over with a smug smile. "You'll thank me later."
Yeonghwa snatches it out her hands, frantically opening her messages to see what damage Misty had done. Her eyes widen as she reads it. "You... you actually wrote something normal."
Yeonghwa: ‘Hi Yunho, it’s Yeonghwa. Sorry for the delay, we’ve been busy with tour prep. Are you still on for coffee? Let me know.’
"What, you thought I'd sabotage you?" Misty looks offended
"I literally just watched you try to type out a confession!"
"I wouldn't actually do that," she insists, her voice carrying a playful lilt despite the sincerity in her eyes. "Sure, I'd joke about it, just to watch you squirm - it's entertaining, after all! But I'd never really go through with it!" Her expression softens, a gentle understanding lighting up her features. "I understand how much Yunho means to you. He was your first love, the first real crush that made your heart race. He was your first kiss, and you shared something deeply intimate with him when you both lost your virginity to one another."
“Misty!!” Yeonghwa groans covering her face in embarrassment, “I should never have told you that!”
“Hey, I was your alibi for that night back in our dorm remember?” Misty giggles lightly pulling her hands away, “I had to sit in a cafe for 3 hours until you text to say Yunho was walking you home so we could walk into the dorm together as if we had been doing cardio practice like we told Haneul!”
Yeonghwa groans and drops her head onto Misty's shoulder. "Don't remind me. I thought I was going to have a heart attack when Haneul looked at me when we walked in. I thought she knew just by looking at me that I had just lost my virginity."
“Well your hair was looking particularly wild when got home!” Misty laughs, “It was when she asked why you were walking weird though and you told her without missing a beat you pulled a muscle doing a tricky position! I nearly died holding in my laughter at the ‘tricky position’.”
“Well I had just lost my virginity to a guy who made me realise the tall man, big feet myth was in fact very true!! Anyone would be walking funny after that!” Yeonghwa joins in with the laughter
“I guess technically your weren’t lying as a position is what gave you that injury!” Misty grins as their laughter dies down, "And for what it's worth, I never told anyone about catching you two in the practice room that time."
"Oh my god, I thought we both agreed to never discuss the practice room incident again," Yeonghwa whines, dropping her head into her hands. "I wanted to literally die when you walked in."
"Please, the look on Yunho's face was priceless. Like a kid with his hand in the cookie jar… or should I say, up your shirt." Misty wiggles her eyebrows suggestively.
"Stop!" Yeonghwa shoves her playfully. "I had just convinced him we wouldn't get caught. 'No one uses this practice room after ten,' I said. 'We'll be fine,' I said."
"And then BAM! Enter Misty, looking for her forgotten water bottle." Misty claps her hands together dramatically. "The way he jumped away from you like you were suddenly made of lava."
“It wasn’t like we were doing anything, just kissing!” Yeonghwa says chuckles despite herself feeling embarrassed again
"With his hand up your shirt and you sitting on his lap?" Misty raises an eyebrow. “And then tried to act all casual like, 'Oh, hey Misty, we were just... stretching.' A revolutionary new stretching technique," she adds with mock seriousness. "Highly effective for... certain muscles."
They both dissolve into laughter again, Yeonghwa's earlier anxiety momentarily forgotten as she leans against the practice room wall.
"God, we were so stupid back then," Yeonghwa sighs, wiping at her eyes. "Sneaking around, thinking we were so slick."
"You weren't slick at all," Misty snort. "Haneul and Jinni might not have caught on, but Areum and I knew something was up when you started wearing his hoodie to practice and claiming it was 'just something you picked up at a store’ and ‘was trying a new style.’"
"What?! You knew about that too?" Yeonghwa's jaw drops.
“Oh come on, the hoodie was like down to your knees and 3 times too big! It was obvious, except to Haneul and Jinni clearly!”
"Why didn't you say anything?" she asks
"Because unlike our company at the time, we weren't complete monsters." Misty's tone shifts slightly, a hint of the old anger surfacing. "And you were happy. Actually fucking happy for once, not just that plastic smile you'd put on for the cameras."
Yeonghwa swallows hard, looking down at her phone where the sent message to Yunho still sat unanswered.
“Look don’t worry about our company. They aren’t like our old one, there were many reasons we left when our contract renewal was up 2 years ago but how they treated you regarding the Yunho situation and refusing to get your mental health help was the deciding factor for Haneul that none of us were staying.”
“I’m sorry.” Yeonghwa says as Misty tilts her head and shoots her a confused look, “For getting involved with someone and putting everyone at risk, for… what I tried to do on that bridge and for causing you all to worry about me.”
“Don’t apologise for Yunho, you two loved one another. That is nothing to be sorry for! But you scared us all so much. Not just getting that call from the manager saying he’d just pulled you back from a railing but what happened afterwards. How despondent you were. You wouldn’t eat, sleep or even speak outside of work. When you were in work mode, you seemed like the cheerful girl we all knew, but the moment the cameras stopped rolling, you looked lifeless, completely dead inside."
“Misty…” she begins
“and I know you felt dead inside too. Do you think I'm not terrified of what might happen if you reconnect and things go wrong? I can't bear another call from a manager telling me you've tried to jump off a bridge again!" Misty exhales deeply, "Or something even worse!"
Yeonghwa places her phone on the floor and crawls over to Misty, hugging her tightly. “I promise you, that will never happen again. I am stronger than I was back then.”
“I know you are but I’ll always worry about you. You are my little baby!” she replies
Suddenly, Yeonghwa's phone buzzes on the floor. Both girls froze, staring at it like it might explode.
“It’s him!” Yeonghwa whispers looking at the notification on her lock screen
"Well, fucking open it!" Misty hisses, crowding over her shoulder.
With trembling fingers, Yeonghwa unlocks her phone.
Yunho: 'Hey Yeonghwa! No worries, I understand you're busy. We have been the same. How about today at 3? There's a little place near our company building in Mapo -gu called Bean There. I think your new company building is in Mapo-gu too? They have private booths in the back that I can book if today suits but I am happy to go wherever you want and what makes you most comfortable.'
Misty snatches the phone again, scanning the message. "Bean There? Isn't that place like, stupidly expensive?"
"Give it back!" Yeonghwa grabs for her phone, nearly toppling over in the process. "And yes, it is. They have those rooms that people who want privacy can use."
"Ooooh, privacy," Misty wiggles her eyebrows suggestively. "So he wants to get you alone, huh?"
"It's not like that!" Yeonghwa slaps her arm. "It's so we don't get caught by fans, you perv."
"Sure, sure. So what are you going to say?"
Yeonghwa stares at her phone, chewing her lip. "I don't know... is it too soon to see him again?"
"For fuck's sake, Hwa! You've waited a week and like 2 years!!" Misty says, “Type something before I do it for you, and this time I promise it’ll be embarrassing!”
Yeonghwa huffs and begins typing.
Yeonghwa: ‘Today would be ideal, but could we schedule it for a bit later in the evening? My day is packed with rehearsals that will keep me busy until the late afternoon, but I'll be free after 7 pm.’
“Happy?” she says to Misty
“Ecstatic!!” Misty grins and within seconds a reply comes back, “Someones keen!”
“Shut up!” Yeonghwa replies but she can’t stop the smile coming to her face and warmth in her chest, “He’s asking if 8pm suits.”
“Gives you time to get a shower and put some clothes on that aren’t sweats or leggings, dress yourself up for him!”
“Oh that isn’t happening - shower hell yes but dressing up nope! The aim is to be as low key as possible and not pull attention to the fact 2 idols are having coffee together.” she says typing out another reply.
“Correction 1 idol and koreas princess!” Misty grins
“Fuck off!” Yeonghwa mumbles kicking her legs in Mistys direction. Yunhos reply comes quickly
Yunho: ‘I’ll get the coffee place booked for 8pm. Looking forward to it! ☺️’
Yeonghwa let out a breath she didn't realise she'd been holding. "He sent a smiley face too."
"Scandalous," Misty said dryly.
"No, but... that's good, right? He's not just doing this out of obligation or to like tell me how much he hates me?"
Misty grabs Yeonghwa by the shoulders. "Hwa… the man almost threw hands with his best friend over you. He's not meeting you for coffee in a ridiculously expensive cafe to give you a lecture on how you ruined his life."
“But what if-”
“If you say ‘what if’ one more fucking time, I’ll tell Jinni you ate her strawberry cake and blamed the manager for throwing it out.”
Yeonghwa gasps, “You wouldn’t dare!”
“Try me!” Misty challenges, “Now instead of overthinking this, why don’t we figure out what you are going to wear before the others arrive and we need to start this rehearsal.”
A smile tugs at Yeonghwa's lips. "Fine. But nothing too obvious! I want to blend in, not stand out which is already hard enough with this red hair!"
“I have you!” Misty smiles softly
Yeonghwa feels a slight calmness wash over her. Excited to see Yunho again but also worried as Hongjoongs words ‘stay away from him’ repeat at the back of her head.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
Yunho places his phone on the table next to the computer and multiple cups of coffee as everyone begins their warm up routines in the practice hall. A smile on his face at finally hearing from Yeonghwa. He knew she was busy as their world tour was starting soon so figured her delay in messaging him was down to that but at the same time, he was scared she would never message him. Since that night after the award show he had thought nonstop about her.
Finally allowing himself to think of her after so long made him remember all their good memories together. But it also opened up the pain once more. He knew Yeonghwa wasn’t a cruel person, despite what Mingi and the others would say about her. She wasn’t bad or evil, or even selfish! He had witnessed first hand how caring, kind, thoughtful, sensitive and selfless she was. The others just never knew her really.
When the message from the unknown number came up on his phone, his heart had skipped not one but 3 beats! He just couldn’t wait any longer to see her and after their dance rehearsal this morning and afternoon, he was free of all schedules for the day which is why he suggested today. Plus he knew that in 5 days Moonlight were having their opening concert of the tour in Seoul then flying to America for 3 months, so she would be very busy. As was he as they were flying out for a tour soon too.
As Yunho turns around in his seat, he notices his flushed face in the mirrored wall and saw Mingi and Wooyoung's eyes on him. "Ooh, Yunho's blushing!" Wooyoung exclaims loudly.
"Shut up!" Yunho retorts, pulling his hoodie over his head to hide his embarrassment.
“What’s got you blushing like a school boy?” San joins in with the teasing
“No one.. I mean nothing!!” Yunho defends, his voice a little louder than he expected
"Yunho's got a cruuuush," San sings, stretching out the word and shimmying his shoulders towards Yunho.
"I do not!" Yunho protested, but the flush on his cheeks has spread to his ears.
Mingi, who has been silently watching from the corner, suddenly speaks up. "It's her, isn't it?"
The playful atmosphere evaporates instantly. Wooyoung freezes, and San's teasing smile falters.
Mingi's jaw tightens. "Yeonghwa."
The name fell like a stone into still water. Hongjoong, who had been adjusting the music, turns around slowly.
"Is it?" Wooyoung asks, his voice suddenly serious as he looks at Yunho.
"Yes, it was Yeonghwa. No, I don’t have a crush on her, and we're going for coffee," Yunho replies, turning around.
"Coffee," Yeosang repeats flatly from where he was tying his shoes.
"Yes, coffee. Does anyone have a problem with that?" Yunho snaps, sounding more defensive than he wanted.
Mingi scoffs. "After everything she did to you—"
"You don't know shit about what happened between us," Yunho says, his voice dangerously low.
"I know enough," Mingi shoots back. "I know I was the one who had to pick up the pieces when she destroyed you."
Yunho takes a step toward him. "Watch it."
"Or what?" Mingi challenged. "You gonna push me again? Over her?"
Seonghwa, who had been silent until now, steps between them. "Let's all just calm down. We have rehearsals in five minutes, and Yunho's personal life is his business."
“Remember we said we wouldn’t get involved when it came to the two of them.” Jongho says
“Unless it affects the group!” Hongjoong says, “We cannot have a repeat of what happened at the award show, and we absolutely cannot have you two fighting either! So Mingi, when it comes to Yeonghwa I don’t want to hear any of your opinions anymore, you keep them to yourself!!” his tone suddenly gets harsher, “And Yunho, stop being so argumentative when it comes to her!”
Both Mingi and Yunho look at one another before looking at their leader.
“Sorry hyung.” Yunho mumbles
“Yeah sorry.” Mingi says
“Don’t say sorry to me!!” Hongjoong says, “I want you both to focus on our practice because some of us have other schedules today and I don’t want to hear another word about Yeonghwa for the rest of the day either!”
Everyone nods and gets themselves ready. A few hours pass by with no further issues or conflict. When they are finished, they go their separate ways while Hongjoong stays at the company to work in his studio. Seonghwa stays behind, sensing something was wrong… more than usual leader stress and the situation between Yunho and Mingi.
"Aren't you heading home?" Hongjoong asks upon spotting Seonghwa in the hallway as he makes his way to his studio.
"Not yet. I wanted to get some more practice in," Seonghwa replies, "but I also wanted to have a private talk with you."
"Come to my studio," Hongjoong responds with a nod.
They walk quietly down the corridor. Seonghwa notices the tension in Hongjoong's entire demeanour, his pale complexion, and dark-rimmed eyes. It's evident to everyone that he's stressed, and Seonghwa knows the situation isn't making things easier. Once inside the small studio, Hongjoong drops his bag in a corner and takes a seat at the desk, while Seonghwa settles onto the small sofa.
“Is everything okay?” Hongjoong asks, keeping his tone straightforward and practical.
“That is what I wanted to ask you,” Seonghwa responds with empathy, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just busy.” he replies in his usual straightforward manner.
“I mean about this whole Yunho and Mingi situation, not to mention Yunho and Yeonghwa!” Seonghwa says
Hongjoong lets out a long sigh and leans back into his chair, closing his eyes and running a hand through his hair. Seonghwa can see the effect it is having on him.
“I don’t know what I am going to do with the two of them. I’ve never seen them speak this way to one another before,” he mumbles with a sense of responsibility, “Out of everyone those two have always been at the bottom of my list to have issues with one another. I always knew I didn’t need to worry about them in that sense. But this? Arguing, fighting? It isn’t them!”
“I know.” Seonghwa nods leaning back on the sofa, "Perhaps we should arrange a proper discussion with them, rather than snatching brief conversations backstage after awards shows or before practice when emotions are running high."
“That’s probably our best option,” he replies, “Mingi has way too many opinions of Yeonghwa - some are warranted but most aren’t. Fuck, Seonghwa… the way he looked at her last week and the way he spoke to her... she looked terrified! It gave me chills, and it wasn't even aimed at me."
"I never really considered how she must have felt witnessing all that," Seonghwa says softly.
Hongjoong sighs once more, “I don’t think I helped matters either and I’m worried it will affect Yunho more.”
“What do you mean?” Seonghwa asks, noticing the conflict on Hongjoongs face
“After I sent Mingi and Yunho back to the waiting room… I spoke to her.” he slowly says, his hands rubbing at his face
Seonghwa stops himself from asking what he said to her, he can see how troubled Hongjoong is by this and decides to let him speak at his own pace and just listen to him. A short silence fills the small room.
“Firstly, I wouldn’t let Yunho talk to her. I told him… no I ordered him to say goodbye as he tried to apologise to her for how Mingi spoke to her… pretty sure he wanted to push me too at that. I think my leader position saved me.” Hongjoong lets out a small breathy laugh, an attempt to release some of the tension from his body and the room.
“Your leader position has saved you a few times… mostly from the wrath of Wooyoung and Jongho!” Seonghwa chuckles and Hongjoongs shoulders relax a bit as he smiles
“Yeah!” he nods, “Anyway, after Yunho left I reminded her of what she said to him when she broke up with him - to ‘leave her alone’… and I told her to do the same to him. I was just so angry looking at her. All my old feelings came back.”
Seonghwa can’t stop the grimace on his face.
“In my defence I didn’t know he’d asked her for coffee and she’d agreed!” he adds quickly
“Joong… how were you supposed to know that? You walked into Yunho and Mingi practically fighting in a public space, had to deal with that situation then you saw her. I don’t know if I could have held my tongue either.” Seonghwa says, “Seeing Yunho in such pain was awful. Fuck, even just remembering seeing him so broken, lying in bed, his eyes empty and then when he disappeared in the middle of the night. Those 5 days we didn’t know where he was were terrifying!”
“Finding him in that motel, drunk and gaunt was the worst. At least the company got him help and a good therapist! I dread to think what could have happened if they didn’t.” Hongjoong replies solemnly as Seonghwa nods slowly.
Both of them knew how close to the edge he was and their company looking after him so well during a vulnerable time was one of the reasons Yunho didn’t walk away.
“Anyway when I looked at her and all I saw was that image of him in that dirty motel, surrounded by empty bottles of alcohol, just looking so dead inside. I was angry at her once more but had to keep reminding myself where I was and who she is. She may be the girl who broke him but she is also a well respected idol and a sunbaenim.” Hongjoong says, “What if my telling her to stay away from him hurts him? He’s already asked us to back off when it comes to her. What if he finds out what I said and hates me for meddling?”
“There are too many what ifs in the world when it comes to Yunho and Yeonghwa. You will drive yourself mad asking them and looking for an answer. All we can do is be there for him, no matter what happens today or afterwards.” Seonghwa replies
“And find a way to gag Mingi at the same time?” Hongjoong says making Seonghwa laugh lightly
“That too!” he replies, “Look if Yunho finds out you spoke to her and tried to warn her off, just explain that it was after you saw the two giants fighting in public and before he told us they were meeting for coffee. He’ll understand.”
“Will he?” Hongjoong asks, “When it comes to Yeonghwa, he is blinded and so defensive. If anyone dares bring her up, you see how he gets.”
“He’ll have to understand.” Seonghwa says, “Maybe you should tell him, explain it was before you knew they’d agreed to coffee and we’d agreed to back off.”
Hongjoong can only nod. A silence falls over the pair, as they both contemplate what could happen.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
The room is small and inviting, featuring soft lighting, cushioned seating, fairy lights adorning the walls and ceiling, and a small table with fresh flowers in the middle. It offers complete privacy, which is exactly what Yunho needed. He understood the importance of ensuring that no one spotted her or noticed them together. He needed the freedom to talk with her without the worry of being observed or overheard.
Every sound from outside the room makes his heart race, wondering if it's her arrival. He glances at his phone to check the time: 8:19 pm. The possibility of being stood up enters his mind, prompting him to take a long sip from one of the bottles of water he ordered. His knee bounces anxiously, causing the small table to tremble slightly. How long should he wait? If she is indeed standing him up, what's a reasonable amount of time to stay? He checks his phone again: 8:23 pm, and a feeling of dread washes over him as he adjusts the baseball cap on his head.
Suddenly, the door in the corner slides open, revealing a petite figure clad in jeans and a black hoodie pulled over their head, with a black face mask covering their face. He rises swiftly, nearly toppling the table laden with bottles of water, assorted cakes he had chosen, and two iced americanos. A streak of vivid red hair slips out from under the hoodie as the mask is taken off, revealing her face. Yeonghwa was standing infront of him - finally!
“I am so sorry I am late!” she huffs
Her face is flushed and she is trying to catch her breath, it was clear to Yunho that she had ran here as she clutches her side. He quickly moves to the other side of the table and pulls her chair out for her.
“Jinni kept asking me to show her my spin jump and to break down how I do it.” she continues as she sits down and he passes a bottle of water to her
"It's alright!" he says with a smile, settling back into his own seat.
"I don't even know why she was asking as when it comes to jumps, kicks, and handstands she has the same coordination and control as a bag in the wind!!" Yeonghwa says, rolling her eyes as she pulls her hood down, her long red hair cascading around her shoulder. Yunho can’t help but laugh at her description. "And sorry for looking such a mess! I didn't have time to shower, just a quick spritz of deodorant and a change of clothes," she adds, glancing at him.
Yunho's smile widens as he looks at her. He feels happy and calm in her presence, the stress from the earlier argument with the guys melting away as he watches her run her fingers through her hair, trying to smooth it out.
He relaxes feeling relief that she hadn’t stood him up and was merely late, as he removes his hat. "You look good… amazing as ever!"
She puts her bag on the floor, eyeing the spread before her. "Did you order the entire menu?"
"Only the best parts," he replies with a shrug, sliding an iced americano toward her. "Still your favourite, right?"
She accepts it, their fingers briefly touching. "You remembered." Her eyes go wide as she looks up at him.
“Hard to forget when you ordered one every day at school!” he laughs, “And told me it was the ‘nectar of the gods’ and how hot coffee is ‘inferior in every way’!”
“I still stand by the nectar of the gods statement but don’t tell anyone this… I sometimes drink hot coffee now.” she whispers dramatically
“Your secret is safe with me.” he whispers back
They share a laugh and exchange glances, feeling the warmth of reuniting but also the nervousness about what lay ahead. The unavoidable conversation about their breakup loomed, with the potential to uncover even deeper wounds.
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(AN: I just wanted to add a note at the bottom instead of at the top so as not to spoil anything for this chapter. I wanted to make a point of showing the difference in the Yeonghwa old company and KQ in how they handled the aftermath of the break up. Yeonghwas company ignored that she needed professional help especially after her attempt, instead focusing on covering up her injuries and force her to work. While KQ got Yunho into therapy and helped him. Although I am touching on these moments to build the story up, I will be going more in depth into those moments in later chapters but KQ also gave Yunho time off while Yeonghwa was forced to work the following day. Also her old company was one of the big 4 - I will not be saying which one!)
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<m.list> ⋆ <next>
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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I Can See You ♡ masterlist
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Summary: Since she was young, everyone knew her as Aria, the youngest and most versatile member of the K-pop group Moonlight, and their ‘queen maknae’. She was adored by fans all over Korea, but no one saw her as Kim Yeonghwa, a girl from a small coastal town. That is until she meets 17-year-old Jeong Yunho at SOPA, and they form an instant friendship that soon turns into love. Despite their strong bond, Yeonghwa makes the difficult decision to break his heart and let him go in order to give his career a chance. But as time passes, their paths continue to cross and fate keeps bringing them together, they struggle to resist the undeniable connection between them.
Pairing: idol!Yunho x IdolFem!OC
Genre: romance, angst, fluff, smut, young love, forbidden love, childhood sweethearts
Chapters: ONE ☾ TWO ☾ THREE ☾ …more to come
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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⭑I Can See You⭑
THREE: secret messages
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Warnings: angst, online bullying, body shaming, arguing, mental health struggles, brief mention of a suicide attempt but no explicit details, excessive drinking, mentions of company manipulation and mistreatment
Word count: 11.9k
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⭑2016⭑
The day of Moonlight's comeback had arrived, and as expected, Yeonghwa was absent from school. Without her, class felt dull, and Yunho occasionally glanced at the empty seat next to him. However, he concentrated on his studies, eagerly counting down the minutes until lunchtime when he could finally watch her music video for "Cosmic Rush." He had enjoyed the teaser clips and concept photos that had been released. Although he had already heard the song and seen the choreography, he was excited to watch the full music video.
The second the school bell rang out and everyone started packing their books, he pulled out his phone and opened his YouTube app. His fingers desperately searching for the music video. A massive smile coming to his face when he sees Yeonghwa is the thumbnail for it. Her white hair with pastel streaks, pink and silver gemstones on her face beside her eyes.
As the music video begins to play, it starts with each member having solo shots of them walking down a darkened street with a dulled down instrumental of the song playing. Haneul is first, then Jinni, Misty and Areum before Yeonghwa comes on the screen and for the first time in his life Yunhos heart races so fast and hard he can feel it beating against his chest, he swears it is about to burst out his chest. Each of their outfits for the opening shots are different but it suits their own styles. Yeonghwa is wearing short white dress with a black corset on top of it, her hair is styled in loose waves. The only thing that is the same for each member is the gemstones beside their eyes. The bands name flashes on the screen and the song fully kicks in.
Yunhos captivated from the start. His eyes on Yeonghwa on every scene she is in. The tone of the music video is a night time theme with lots of stars, moons and sparkles which fits their overall band concept well. There is some stunning shots of Japanese landscape. Seeing the whole choreography together with all 5 members and their outfits, it looked even more spectacular than when Yeonghwa taught him it in the private practice room.
All 5 looked amazing but Yunho was just in awe over Yeonghwa effortlessly dancing, her powerful dance moves and emotive facial expressions. Even when sharing the scene with 4 other people she commanded it.
As the dance break begins he find himself mimicking the dance moves she taught him with his arms and upper body as he sat on his seat. All 5 members are in perfect sync with one another but the signature move of the backwards handstand into splits was Yeonghwas solo move as the 4 members stood around her, as she gets to her feet they continues the rest of the choreography together to the end.
When the final notes faded out and the screen goes black, Yunho sits motionless for a few moments, processing what he had just watched. His heart is still racing but has calmed down slightly. He feels a sense of pride for Yeonghwas performance on the video, she looked amazing, her dance moves were flawless and her rap solos were jaw dropping while her backing vocals on the track were noticeable.
The entire performance was incredible, showcasing the effort each member had invested. However, Yunho feels especially proud of Yeonghwa, knowing how she had juggled her schoolwork and additional solo commitments while working tirelessly for this comeback.
He is so excited for the upcoming music show performances of it now, the first one being aired in a few hours. Although he had a dance practice scheduled after school, San - a huge fan of Moonlight, had mentioned he would watch the performance during a break, so Yunho intended to join him. They were also going to meet the new potential trainee.
It was going to be a busy evening but he felt a jolt of motivation to work harder. He looked up at the clock and quickly realised he had to go to Mingis school for their usual lunch and he had spent 10 minutes of his 1 hour lunch break staring at his phone and thinking of Yeonghwa.
“Shit!” he mumbles pushing his school books into his bag and running out the classroom, praying Mingi wouldn’t be annoyed at him running late.
As he runs outside the building, he slips on the light snow that had started to fall during the morning. It was nearly the end of November and the weather had turned cold quickly. Yunho had been so focused on school work and making sure he made diligent notes for Yeonghwa too that he hadn’t noticed the snow begin from the window beside his desk. He pulls his blazer tighter around his body as the cold hits him. Instantly regretting not taking his coat with him that morning, however most of his things were now packed as he and the other trainees were moving into their dorm that in a couple of days.
Yunho moved from Gwangju to Seoul after transferring to the Seoul dance academy, where he met Mingi. Though initially in separate branches, they became fast friends during joint meetings. So Yunho seized the chance to move to Seoul when he was offered a transfer. He had wanted to be closer to Mingi but also to be in a city with more opportunities to do what he loved and live with his grandparents. Earlier that year, he auditioned for KQ and was pleasantly surprised to find Mingi there too. They both knew they were going to auditions but neither said for which company so it was a happy surprise when Mingi walked into the training room that day!
Initially, it was just Hongjoong, Yunho, and Mingi, but San soon joined then. His next goal was to apply for SOPA and was overjoyed to be accepted into the program as he had wanted to train there for years. With Seonghwa recruited and a potential new trainee, Yunho was pleased when the CEO announced they would have a dorm.
Yunho had loved living with his grandparents and getting to spend that time with them but he also could not wait for dorm life. It meant they could all bond better, their day schedules would be separate as they all attended different schools but when it came to coming and going from practice they would be together now.
“Where were you?” Mingis deep voice booms across the small cafe as Yunho eventually runs into it.
“Sorry, I was… uh.. held up after class.” he replies falling into the seat opposite his friend who has already ordered
Yunho didn't want to admit to Mingi that his tardiness was due to watching Moonlight's music video. He hadn't shared his friendship with her with anyone yet, not even his grandparents. He could picture Hongjoongs disapproving look at Yunho being friends with a girl, San was a huge Moonlight fan and would likely lose his cool if he found out, but Yunho also felt she deserved her privacy. Even though Yunho had repeatedly suggested that Yeonghwa join him and Mingi for lunch, he hadn't revealed to Mingi the identity of his new friend at SOPA, leaving Mingi unaware. If Yeonghwa decides to join them, Yunho would inform Mingi about her identity and make him promise to keep it a secret. Until then, Yunho intended to stay silent.
“Well I ordered food.” Mingi replies pointing to the food laden table, “And I don’t want to hear any shit about you paying me back! It is the least I can do when you drag your ass all the way over here everyday just so I don’t have to eat alone.”
“You know I don’t mind it.” Yunho says
“Guess it beats eating lunch with the asshole SOPA crowds!” Mingi laughs
Yunho feels his stomach lurch. While Mingi is slightly correct, most of the students at the school were in fact assholes there were a few ones who weren’t. Yeonghwa being the main one, but during her days away from school he had made somewhat acquaintances with some of the other fellow trainees. He didn’t want to hang around with them the way he did with Yeonghwa though.
Everyone was wary of her, there wasn’t one person who liked her except Yunho. Most made inappropriate comments, while others kept their distance, intimidated by her idol status or misconceptions about her. Many thought she was egotistical and spoiled, without any proof but the majority were jealous she was already achieving what they wanted. In reality, Yunho found her to be the opposite: genuinely kind, caring, and inquisitive about his life and training. She wasn't spoiled or bossy at all.
When they were alone, she felt at ease, and her voice shifted away from what Yunho thought of as the 'Aria voice.' Her natural tone was deeper, similar to her rapping voice. As Aria, however, she used a high-pitched, almost childlike tone, a result of years of extensive coaching to make her sound cuter. Around him, her Jeolla dialect, which matched his own, emerged more frequently, evoking memories of home for him.
Deep down he could see how she longed to be ‘normal’, to be treated like a regular person and not some circus freak. He noticed the people in class and around the school looking at her, whispering, taking sneaky photos of her and he saw the pain in her eyes whenever it happened. She never said anything or complained, but he could see it upset her, which is why he often used his height a lot of the time in an attempt to shield her from it as much as he could.
“So Hongjoong called me this morning before I left for school…” Mingi says with a mouthful of noodles
“Oh?” Yunho responds, pulling his thoughts away from Yeonghwa, “He didn’t call me.”
“He tried but your grandmother told him you had already left for school early. Anyway he wants a meeting as soon as we all arrive at the company after school. Something about this new potential trainee coming tonight.” he answers, “He wants us all on our best behaviour! ‘Just act like normal human beings for once in your lives and not your weird selves!’” he adds imitating Hongjoong while scrunching his face
“Probably!” Yunho laughs loudly nearly spitting out his food "Hongjoong really does think we're a bunch of wild animals.”
“I mean, is he wrong?” Mingi shrugs his shoulders "Remember when San tried to do that back flip off the practice room couch and nearly broke the couch?"
Yunho chokes on his drink. "Or when Hongjoong found you hiding in the storage closet eating ramen at 1 AM during that overnight practice. Your face was priceless," he laughs. "You looked like a raccoon caught digging through trash."
"Hey! I was starving! That tiny hyung had us practising for six hours straight!" Mingi defends himself, pointing his chopsticks accusingly. "Not all of us can survive on determination and spite like him."
Yunho wipes his mouth, still chuckling. "I swear he's part robot. I've never seen him actually sleep."
"Who needs sleep when you can compose?" Mingi mimics Hongjoong's serious face before breaking into a grin. "So, any idea who this new trainee might be?"
Yunho shrugs, pushing his food around. "No clue. Just hope they're not another perfectionist. We've got enough of that with Seonghwa and Hongjoong."
"God, can you imagine? Three of them?" Mingi groans dramatically, clutching his chest. "I'd never get away with leaving my socks on the floor again."
"You shouldn't be doing that anyway, you nasty bas-"
"Like you're any better!" Mingi cuts him off. "I've seen your room at your grandparents. It looks like a clothing bomb went off."
Yunho's ears turns red. "That's... different. I was packing."
"For three months?" Mingi raises an eyebrow. “Lets just hope you are cleaner when we move into the dorm this weekend.”
"Shut up and eat your food," Yunho mutters, kicking him under the table.
Mingi winces but keeps his shit-eating grin. "So how's the fancy school treating you? Made any friends besides this mysterious lunch-ditcher you keep mentioning?"
"It's... fine. You know how it is. Everyone's too busy trying to be the next big thing."
"Except you, obviously," Mingi teases. "You're just tall."
"Can't help genetics," Yunho shot back. "Unlike you, who needs platform shoes to reach the top shelf."
"I do NOT wear platform-" Mingi starts indignantly, then caught Yunho's smirk. "Asshole."
"Takes one to know one."
Yunho checks his phone, trying to be subtle, but Mingi caught him.
"Waiting for something? Or someone?" Mingi wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
"Just checking the time," Yunho lies, quickly pocketing his phone. He'd been checking to see if Moonlight's video had gained anymore views yet.
"Sure, sure," Mingi drawls. "Anyway, Hongjoong told me to tell you to go straight to the company after school, ‘fed up of that boy always being late after school!’."
Yunho blushes slightly, the reason it takes him longer than usual to get to the company is he liked to wait with Yeonghwa until her manager picked her up. She usually waited until everyone had left before she went out in an attempt to avoid the crowds and he didn’t like leaving her alone in the classroom. “The buses from the school are always full, I need to wait like 7 buses before I can get on one!” he lies
“You wouldn’t want to miss Hongjoongs all important meeting!” Mingi continues
"Or the Moonlight performance," Yunho blurts before he could stop himself.
Mingi pauses mid-bite. "You follow them too? I thought San and Seonghwa were the only ones with the girl group obsession."
"I don't… I mean… they're just really good dancers," Yunho stammers, feeling his face heat up. "Professional research, you know?"
"Uh-huh," Mingi nods slowly, a mischievous smile spreading across his face. "Professional. Research. Got it."
"Fuck off," Yunho mutters, throwing a napkin at Mingi's face. "So, uh... what do you think the company has planned for us this weekend when we move into the dorm?" he asks, hoping to steer Mingi's teasing away
"Not sure," Mingi shrugs, popping a piece of meat into his mouth. "I do know that Seonghwa will have us deep cleaning the entire dorm though and probably have a cleaning schedule made up too! You’ve seen how bad he is in the dance practice room, imagine what he is like at home!”
“To be honest that wouldn’t be a bad thing, we are all pretty messy and probably need someone to keep on our asses about being clean.” Yunho says finishing up his food
“He really is obsessed with the cleaning. Did you see him cleaning the mirrors yesterday? He looked horrified at how dirty the water was after the first wipe.” Mingi laughs
“Can you blame him? I don’t think those mirrors in the practice room have ever been cleaned! I know none of us has!” he replies
“That’s true!” Mingi nods
As Yunho and Mingi finish their lunch, they part ways, promising to meet up at the company later. Yunho checks his phone one last time before putting it away. The video has surpassed 10 million views in just 4 hours! He feels a surge of pride for Yeonghwa and her group, and he can’t resist any longer.
Yunho: Hey Yeong! Congrats on the music video hitting 10M!! The MV is so good, you nailed that choreo! I’ll be watching the comeback performance later on. Fighting!!
He knows she’ll be too busy to check her phone but wanted to let her know that he watched the video and loved it.
The rest of his school day goes by quickly and before he knows it he is stepping on to the bus to the company building. As he finds a seat at the back and settles into it, Yunho pulls out his phone again, refreshing Moonlight's page. The number had continued to climb steadily - 12.5 million now! He smiles proudly to himself as he reads through the comments but his smile fades when he reads one -
‘that company clearly favours Aria. Making her the thumbnail when her performance this comeback was so shit!’
He goes on to read more comments.
‘Her dancing was a mess, rapping was awful, and her outfits?! Disgusting!!’
‘She gained so much weight. Are the stylists blind? How could they even think of squeezing her fat ass into those tight outfits?!’
‘I hope she falls on her ass during the performances, they should have gave that dance move to someone who can pull it off like Misty.’
‘You can tell her bandmates fucking hate her.’
Yunho clenches his fists, his knuckles turning white as he stares at the cruel comments attacking Yeonghwa. A surge of protective rage floods through him, his heart aching for his friend who didn't deserve this vicious bullying.
"That's it, I've had enough of this crap," Yunho mutters under his breath, jabbing at his phone screen with a vengeance. He began furiously typing out a scathing retort to the vile commenters:
‘How dare you critique Aria’s weight and appearance like that?! She's a talented, hardworking idol who pours her heart into every performance. Her body is none of your damn business! She is a minor and you are an adult talking about her body! And her dancing was on point - you obviously have no clue what you're talking about if you think she messed up. Aria is an integral part of Moonlight and her bandmates clearly love her. You're just pathetic trolls spewing nasty personal attacks because you have nothing better to do with your life. Grow up and get a hobby that doesn't involve bullying idols.’
Satisfied with his scathing riposte, Yunho hits send before pausing. He knows Yeonghwa reads comments on videos. After her strict no eating policy in the lead up to the comeback, he knew the weight comments would hit her the hardest and he also had a feeling her company was harder on her because of them. It was madness to him as she was so petite naturally and a lot slimmer in person than he had realised.
The day in the private practice room when she nearly fell over and he instinctively held onto her waist to steady her, his hands easy fit around it, his fingers almost connecting on either side and he felt her hip bones. Yunho was already concerned about her restricting her food intake for the upcoming comeback, but he worried that reading negative comments could have a more lasting impact on her. Knowing she often read comments about the band, he hoped she would encounter the supportive words from genuine Moonlight fans and realise that not everyone believed the harsh rumours about her. He begins to report every negative comment he can see for the rest of the journey.
As Yunho exits the bus, he feels lighter knowing he had stood up for his friend in a some small way. His company building comes into view as he rounds the corner and he spots San squatting down to tie his shoelaces. His giant backpack almost completely hiding his small frame. Yunho sneaks up behind him and as San stands up, he grabs his waist and shouts ‘boo’ causing the young boy to scream loudly.
San's scream echoes through the small street, causing several passersby to turn their heads. He whips around, clutching his chest dramatically.
"What the actual fuck, Yunho?!" San gasps, eyes wide. "I think my soul just left my body!"
Yunho doubles over with laughter, slapping his knee. "Your face! Oh my god, your face!"
"Yeah, laugh it up," San grumbles, adjusting his backpack. "See if I share my snacks with you during practice."
"Aw, come on," Yunho says, throwing an arm around San's shoulders. "Your screams are like music to my ears."
Yunho had bonded instantly with San when he joined the company, he felt a sense of protectiveness over the young boy. He was petite in size, had a baby face despite only being a couple of months younger than Yunho, had an innocent outlook on the world and he could barely dance but his vocals were out of this world. However, San always worked harder and longer than everyone on his dancing to make up for it and both Yunho, Hongjoong and Mingi could see the determination and potential in him so Yunho made it his mission to help him with the dancing aspect.
"I hate you so much right now." San shrugs off Yunho's arm, but there's a small smile tugging at his lips.
“I know you love me!” Yunho grins in response
They walk through the entrance of the small building, scanning their trainee ID cards.
"So," San says with a mischievous look creeping on his face, "Mingi texted me that you're a secret Moonlight fan? Interesting development."
Yunho nearly trips over his own feet. "What? No… I mean… it's not like that."
"Your phone screen is literally still open to their YouTube page," San points out, gesturing to the phone in Yunho's hand. “Which you better hide before Hongjoong sees it!”
“Shit!” Yunho quickly shoves his phone into his pocket. "I was just... appreciating their choreography."
"Mm-hmm, and I'm just 'appreciating' Mistys vocals," San air-quotes with a smirk. "Come on, admit it! You've fallen into the Moonlight black hole just like me and Seonghwa hyung."
"You're delusional," Yunho mutters, pressing the elevator button with more force than necessary.
"Says the guy who just wrote a novel-length defence of Aria in the YouTube comments," San retorts, leaning against the wall with a knowing look.
Yunho freezes. "How did you-"
"I follow the comments section like a hawk," San shrugs. "Plus, your username is literally 'JYunho99.' Not exactly incognito, genius."
The elevator doors open, and Yunho steps in, wishing he could disappear into the floor. "Those comments were bullshit. They don't know what they're talking about."
San's teasing expression softens. "Hey, I get it. The hate she gets is ridiculous. I've been reporting those comments all morning during lessons."
“Really?” Yunho asks surprised
"Of course! Moonlight deserves better than that toxic crap," San says earnestly. "Especially Aria. Did you see that backwards handstand into splits she did? Absolutely insane."
Yunho can't help the smile that spreads across his face. "Yeah, it was pretty awesome."
"‘Pretty awesome’? It was god-tier!" San exclaims, bouncing on his toes. "I've been trying to figure out how she does it without breaking her spine. My back hurts just thinking about it."
"You'd need years of practice and probably some superhuman flexibility," Yunho says, remembering how Yeonghwa had patiently taught the technique to him until he had mastered it.
"Or black magic," San nods seriously. "I'm leaning toward black magic."
The elevator dings, and they step out onto their practice floor.
"By the way," San says, lowering his voice as they approach the practice room, "I set an alarm to watch their music show comeback stage later. Wanna join?"
"Already planning on it," Yunho admits.
San's face lights up. “It will be so good to have another Stardust around!”
“Who is a Stardust?” Seonghwa voice comes suddenly from behind them
“Yunho!” San grins, “He has saw the light with Moonlight and decided to join the Stardust fandom!” Yunho can feel his ears turning red once more, “He also already has a bias!”
“San!” Yunho groans as the three of them walk into dance practice room to see Mingi and Hongjoong already there
“Oh who is it?” Seonghwa asks excited, “No, let me guess!! Is it Jinni?!”
“Nope!” San shakes his head
"Areum?" Seonghwa guesses again, leaning against the practice room mirror.
"Not even close," San snickers, dropping his backpack on the floor.
"Oh come on," Yunho groans, "can we not do this right now?"
"Do what?" Hongjoong asks, looking up from his notebook where he'd been scribbling what looked like lyrics.
"Yunho's got a thing for Aria from Moonlight." San answers
"I do not have a 'thing'!" Yunho protests, his voice cracking embarrassingly. "I just think she's talented… they all are!"
“Helps that she is cute, adorable, full of aegyo, pocket sized and koreas princess!” Mingi says with a massive grin on his face
“Oh could you imagine the two of them side by side! She is so tiny and he is so tall, they’d look cute together!” Seonghwa grins
Yunho can feel his ears getting hot and red. Little did they know he has been side by side with her multiple times and her small height compared to him is one of the things he likes most.
"Plus he wrote an essay defending her honour in the YouTube comments," San adds, taking off his school tie.
Seonghwa's eyebrows shoot up. "Oh? Our Yunho, getting into fan wars online?"
"It wasn't a fan war," Yunho mutters, dropping his bag and avoiding everyone's eyes. "People were being assholes."
“Wait.. how were you able to write in the comments?” Hongjoong asks Yunho his eyebrows lowering before he looks over at San, “And how did you know?”
Yunho and San exchange silent glances at one another. Neither of them can reveal their secret phones to him or he’ll take them away.
“School computers!” San replies with a nonchalant shrug
Hongjoong closes his notebook with a snap. "As fascinating as Yunho's idol crush is-"
"It's not a crush!"
"-we have more important things to discuss," Hongjoong continues, ignoring Yunho's interruption. "The new trainee is coming soon, and I need you all to behave like functioning human beings for once."
"Define 'functioning'," San smirks.
"No screaming, no weird jokes, no random dance battles, no talking of excessive cleaning routines, and for god's sake, no one mention the time Mingi got stuck in the bathroom stall," Hongjoong lists off, pointing at each of them in turn.
"The lock was faulty!" Mingi protests
"Anyway," Hongjoong cuts in before they can derail further, "this kid could be our future member, and we really want him so first impressions matter."
“Do we know much about him?” Seonghwa asks
“All I know is that he is coming from Big Hit, I don’t know the reason why he is leaving them but there are many companies competing for him so he is a big deal!” Hongjoong says, “If we can show him he’d be a great fit here then we have a chance of him picking us.”
“But if there are so many companies after him, why would he pick an unknown small one like us?” Yunho asks
“It is true these bigger ones have more advantages and opportunities than us but what we can do is give him the attention to learn and become who he wants to. Less people means more attention for what the individual needs.” he answers, “So we need to be welcoming and professional, show him we are serious about this and him.”
“So, to recap - Yunho is a secret Stardust with a crush on the maknae,” San begins as Yunho rolls his eyes while he takes off his yellow SOPA blazer, “Mingi claims the lock was faulty in the bathroom which is how he got locked in there for nearly an hour, and we’ve to be normal!”
“Pretty much.” Hongjoong replies, “Now lets get changed and warm up for this practice, he will be here in an hour.”
They all make their way to the changing room. Yunho catches himself checking the time on the wall clock, it was 2 hours until Moonlight's first performance for this comeback. He was hoping that he could watch it live and not on a replay.
As Yunho enters the changing room, he feels his phone buzzing in his pocket. He swiftly heads to the restroom, locks the door, and takes out his phone. A broad smile spreads across his face when he sees the hamster emoji on his message notification, his hidden contact name for Yeonghwa.
Yeonghwa: ‘I’ll work extra harder on todays performance, show everyone the best side of me.’
Yunho knows shes read the comments online and his heart drops. He stares at the phone, wondering how to respond when he sees she is currently typing something. He waits with batted breathe for her message to come through as he hears Hongjoong tell Mingi to stop messing around and get changed, knowing he will be getting scolded next he quickly changes out of his school clothes and into sweats when the message pops up.
Yeonghwa: ‘And thank you for your message.’ Yunho: You will do well. San, Seonghwa and I will be watching and cheering you on!’
“Lets go everyone!” Hongjoong shouts
Yunho stares at his phone, his thumbs hovering over the keyboard debating sending a second message.
Yunho: ‘I missed you today.’
He sends before quickly adding
Yunho: ‘at school I mean!’
His heart is racing at his impulsive actions. He can feel beads of sweat gather on his brow as he rereads what he just wrote.
Yeonghwa: ‘I miss you too…’
His heart skips a beat as he stares at his phone,
Yeonghwa: ‘at school.’
Yunho's cheeks heat up as he stares at the message, his stomach doing a weird flip. Was she flirting? Was he flirting? Were they both just being friendly? He has no idea, but he can't stop smiling like an idiot.
“Yunho, now!!” Hongjoong shouts again, “Unless you’ve pulled a Mingi and gotten yourself locked in there!”
“Yah!” comes Mingis loud voice from the hallway, “The lock was faulty!!”
“I’ll be a second!” he shouts back as Hongjoong mumbles something before walking out, leaving the changing room now empty
Yunho grins at his phone, fingers tapping rapidly.
Yunho: 'Good luck on your performance. Knock 'em dead (but not literally, that would be bad for your reputation)'
Three dots appear immediately.
Yeonghwa: 'Thanks. My manager is glaring at me. Gotta go soon to get my makeup done. They're putting actual CRYSTALS on my face. The glue they use for stage performance is brutal! Pray for my skin!!' Yunho: 'RIP your pores. Fighting!' Yeonghwa: 'What are you doing right now?' Yunho: 'About to do dance practice. New potential trainee coming to interview. Hongjoong's having a meltdown.' Yeonghwa: ‘That is normal. It is like a requirement for leaders to be having a meltdown. Haneul has had 7 so far today…. wait make that 8, she’s just spilled water on her top! Manager-nim is no longer glaring at me now! haha’
Yunho laughs loudly before clamping his hand over his mouth to muffle the sound then sees more dots appear.
Yeonghwa: 'Make sure you stretch properly before practice. Don't want you pulling something before our next dance session.'
His heart does that stupid flutter thing again.
Yunho: 'Aww, are you worried about me?' Yeonghwa: ‘Just don't want to waste my teaching skills on an injured pupil.'
Yunho's thumbs hover over the keyboard. Yunho: 'I'll be extra careful then. Can't disappoint my favourite dance teacher.' Yeonghwa: 'Smart boy. Better than all those SOPA kids who can't tell their left from right.'
The bathroom door rattles suddenly, making Yunho nearly drop his phone as he hadn’t heard anyone come back into the changing area.
"Yunho-ya!" Seonghwa's voice calls through the door. "Hongjoong's about to blow a gasket. Are you alive in there?"
"Yeah, just… uh… stomach issues!" Yunho calls back, wincing at his lame excuse.
He can practically hear Seonghwa's eyeroll. "Well, hurry up. Staff member has just said the new kid's just arrived. CEO changed his appointment time and didn’t bother telling us."
"Shit, really?" Yunho says, his heart jumping for a different reason now
“Yeah, Hongjoong is freaking so come on so he can give us another pep talk on acting normal before we meet the guy.” Seonghwa says before leaving the changing room,
Yunho quickly sends one last text.
Yunho: 'Gotta run! New guys here early. I’ll try to message you tonight when I get home… let you know what you missed at school today.’ Yeonghwa: ‘Good luck with the new guy! Remember to stretch properly and drink lots of water! oh and eat a banana afterwards! Training, fighting!!’
With a smile and a final look at the messages, Yunho tucks it back into his bag, feeling a renewed sense of determination and motivation. As he exits the changing room and goes back to the practice hall, he knows that no matter how busy their lives may be, their connection will always be a source of strength and support between one another. With a sense of contentment, he looks forward to the moments they will share, both in person and through their messages, knowing that their friendship is only growing with each passing day.
⭑2020⭑
A week has passed since the award show. Yeonghwa had managed to get Yunhos number via her manager who knew someone who knew one of Ateezs managers. ‘It was a whole who-knows-who thing!’ her manager had laughed when she handed the number over to Yeonghwa.
She attempted to text him several times to set up the coffee meeting, but each time her thumb lingered over the 'send' button, a surge of nausea would wash over her, prompting her to delete the message. Was she truly ready to let him back into her life? What if the coffee meeting turned into a disaster? Or even more complicated, what if it went smoothly and everything became chaotic?
After she walked out of his dorm that night, Yunhos excruciating sobs ringing in her ears, his heartbroken face burned into her brain, and Mingis words hitting her hard, she walked to Han River. She craved a moment of solitude before returning to her own dorm to face her roommates. The thought of their disappointed and judgmental looks was unbearable. However, as she stood on the bridge gazing at the water, the weight of her actions struck her hard—the harsh words she uttered and the pain she inflicted became all too real.
The water below had appeared so serene that she almost envied it, and before she realised it, she had scaled the railing. In a matter of seconds, she was forcibly pulled back and slammed onto the concrete ground by a man who pinned her down, shouting at her. She couldn't hear his words, it felt like she was in the water, drowning, everything was muffled but she knew it was her manager. His rough handling of her left a cut on her cheek and bruises on her arms and legs, which only angered her company further. They belittled her for being reckless and for creating additional work for the makeup artists who now had to conceal her injuries. Instead of showing concern for her mental state or attempting to help her after her actions, their primary worry was how it affected them.
Afterwards, Yeonghwa buried her pain deep inside, locking it away securely. She understood that she couldn't allow herself to think about him again, fearing she might repeat her past actions. Her bandmates were supportive, though their reactions differed to the situation with Yunho. Haneul and Jinni were annoyed that she had gotten involved with someone, while Areum and Misty showed her compassion. Despite their differing views on the situation, all four agreed that Yeonghwa needed help, and if the company wouldn't provide it, they would step in. They kept a close watch on her, ensuring she was never left alone. Although she realised their intentions were well-meaning, she felt suffocated—caught between the company, her well meaning bandmates and keeping her pain at bay.
Initially it was easy for Yeonghwa to put her feelings aside, the company had took away her phone so if had tried to contact her she wasn’t seeing any of it, she didn’t see him anymore as they’d both graduated school and she was busy with work. But then all that was ruined when one night in the company building as she was rehearsing for an upcoming solo schedule she had, Yunhos voice floated through the quiet corridor, his hearty laugh and her heart fluttered and her legs nearly gave out.
It had been months since she last heard him, heard his infectious laughter and she had quickly followed the noise. Her body unconsciously seeking him out, down the corridor and into a small room. There she saw some staff members watching TV and there he was. Dancing in a practice room at KQ with Hongjoong and Mingi, a room that Yeonghwa had visited a couple of times. That was the night she learned that he was preparing to debut and they had filmed a show about it called Code Name is Ateez.
She struggled to suppress her feelings and, instead of practicing, found herself searching for details of Ateez's debut and watching their dance videos online. She couldn't resist watching him dance, feeling proud of his solo performance and their upcoming debut, but an unbearable pain struck her, and she dropped her iPad. He was no longer in that box. In the following weeks, she tried to move on, but on the debut day, she secretly watched their performance and music video. Hidden in the closet, she cried tears of happiness and pain.
Every new music video, every comeback, she followed it all. She was so happy that he, and his fellow members had finally debuted and were slowly doing well in the industry but it made her long for him once more and those feelings she’d buried deep were coming back again. Her members could see her inner turmoil and tried to be around her more, keeping a very close eye on her mental wellbeing. None of them wanted her going back to that dark place again. Misty and Areum were the only ones to know she was watching every performance though.
It wasn’t until award season of 2019/2020 that they finally came to be in the same room. She tried not to look at him, especially infront of eagle eyed fans who filmed everything. Just a glance in a male idols direction can cause a scandal and she did well until the award show last week when Ateez and Moonlight were seated side by side.
“Ya, what you doing?” a voice from behind her causes her to jump and drop her phone on the hardwood floor
“Misty!!!” Yeonghwa growls picking it up
“Just text him!” she replies sinking onto the floor beside her
Yeonghwa had yet another message typed out to send him and had spent the past few minutes staring at it. She had been so focused on the device in her hand and the memories of Yunho holding her hand, remembering all over again how tiny her hand was in his, his forehead pressed against hers from the week before that she hadn’t even heard Misty enter the empty dance practice room.
"Text who?" Yeonghwa asks, pretending to be clueless.
"You know, that very tall and handsome guy from the rookie group who was eyeing you last week," Misty responds with a mischievous grin.
"I have no clue who or what you're even referring to!" Yeonghwa retorts, deleting the message and locking her phone before stretching her arms above her head.
“Don’t try to play dumb with me Hwa!” she says as she begins her own stretching routine, “Areum told me about your little rendezvous with Yunho.”
“Shut up!” Yeonghwa snaps her head to look at her, “Don’t say that! Haneul will fucking kill me if she knew!”
"I haven't told her, and Areum won't either. Jinni's in the dark too. So relax!" Misty says, her teasing tone quickly disappearing as she notices the fear in Yeonghwa's eyes. "Want to tell me how it went when you talked to him again?"
"Weird," Yeonghwa replies, tugging at a loose thread on her leggings. "It was awkward at first, but then we slipped back into our old ways so quickly. The banter we used to have, him teasing me about my height, and me doing the same to him..." A small smile appears on Yeonghwa's face, mirrored by Misty, who is pleased to see her younger friend looking happy. But then Yeonghwa's smile fades. "Then he asked me out for coffee."
“Coffee?” Misty asks, stretching her legs and leaning forwards between them so her chest was flat on the floor
"'Just as friends... no pressure!'" Yeonghwa says, using air quotes to mimic Yunho's words.
“And what did you say?”
“Well after trying hard to resist, I ended up agreeing to one coffee.” she sighs
“One coffee?”
“ONE coffee!” Yeonghwa shoots her a look, “Then Mingi showed up.”
“That fucking dude!” Misty rolls her eyes sitting upright and twisting to the side, “He is such a jerk!”
“Mingi is just… protective of Yunho. I can’t blame him for reacting the way he did.” Yeonghwa sighs
“And how exactly did he react?” Misty raises an eyebrow, her jaw tightening
Yeonghwa grimaces, picking at her leggings more aggressively now. "He pulled Yunho away from me like I was some kind of disease. Called me a bitch right to my face."
"He fucking what?" Misty's stretching halted immediately, her face contorting with rage. "That lanky piece of-"
"I kind of had it coming," Yeonghwa interrupts, shaking her head. "After what I did to Yunho."
"No, fuck that." Misty was now fully upright, her stretching completely abandoned. "I don't care what happened between you two. That doesn't give Mingi the right to call you names like you're nothing."
Yeonghwa let out a sigh, resting her head against the mirrored wall. "That's not even the worst part."
"What could be worse than-"
"Yunho shoved him."
Misty's jaw drops. "He did what?"
"He physically shoved him. Hard. It looked like they were about to start a fight right there in the hallway." Yeonghwa rakes her fingers through her hair, further disarraying her already messy ponytail. "I've never seen Yunho like that. He was... Oh my God, he was furious. His face was all red and-"
"Shit," Misty mumbles. "What happened next?"
“Hongjoong showed up, thank fuck!” Yeonghwa closes her eyes, the memory still fresh. “He told them both to go back to the waiting room then simply told me to stay away from Yunho.”
“Shit!” Misty repeats, “So you’re telling me..” she scoots closer, “that Yunho, the most calmest man on the planet almost fought his best friend over you!”
“Don’t say it like that!”
"Like what? Like he's still clearly hung up on you?"
Yeonghwa groans. "This is why I can't text him. It's all too messy already. Previous emotions are still too raw."
"Or maybe," Misty nudges her with an elbow, "it's proof you should text him. Yunho's not the fighting type. If he was ready to throw down with his bestie, that coffee date means more to him than just catching up."
"That's exactly what I'm afraid of," Yeonghwa mutters, picking up her phone again. "What if I hurt him again? What if the company finds out? What if-"
“Kim Yeonghwa!!” Misty says firmly, instantly causing her mouth to clamp shut, “Sorry to use your full name but I had to shut you up and stop you from spiralling.”
Yeonghwa swallows hard and nods, taking a deep breath to steady herself.
“Our new company… it isn’t like the old one. That place almost killed you…” her voice falters slightly but she quickly regains her composure, “what they forced you do to Yunho, and to yourself. I hated it. You know I did. We all did.”
Yeonghwa closes her eyes, biting the inside of her lip as painful memories flood her mind.
“They blackmailed you. An innocent teenager. Maybe if you told Yunho he’d underst….”
“No!!” Yeonghwa interrupts firmly “Yunho can never know what our old company did or what they planned to do to him! Never!!”
“But Yeon…”
“I said no Miyeon!” The mention of Mistys Korean name stops her in her tracks. It was rare for her bandmates, or anyone to call her that. Unlike Yeonghwa, she liked her stage name. She knew when someone called her Miyeon, it meant they were serious. “I love you like a sister but I swear to god if you or anyone else tells him the truth, I will hate you and I’ll leave.”
“Okay, I won’t say anymore about that.” Misty nods softly "You're scared, I get it. But sometimes you've got to pull your head out of your ass and just do it."
"Poetic," Yeonghwa mutters before letting out a small laugh
“That is why you and Haneul are the talented songwriters and I am just here to provide a pretty face and some comedy!!” she replies, “But seriously, you’ve spoken to him and he’s spoken to you. If he seriously hated you, he wouldn’t have and he wouldn’t have asked for coffee either and he certainly would not have pushed Mingi.”
"Why is everything so fucking complicated?" she whines, staring up at the ceiling. “What if it blows up in my face? What if he wants to meet so he can just tell me to my face how-”
"What if you stop overthinking for five fucking seconds and just see what happens?" Misty grabs the phone from beside Yeonghwa. "One coffee. That's all you agreed to. Not marriage, not getting back together. Just coffee."
"Hey!" Yeonghwa lunges for it, but Misty rolls away, already typing.
"'Hi you sexy handsome tall man,'" Misty reads aloud as she types, "'I've been staring at my phone for a week trying to work up the nerve to text you but I kept getting distracted when I thought of your face and sexy ass-'"
"I will murder you in your sleep!" Yeonghwa scrambles to her knees, diving at Misty who shrieks and rolls again.
"'-I cannot wait to see you again. How's tomorrow at 2? There's a place near-’"
"MIYEON I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD-" Yeonghwa finally tackles her, wrestling for the phone.
"And... send!" Misty grins triumphantly, holding the phone out of reach.
Yeonghwa freezes. "You didn't."
"I absolutely did."
"Give me my phone." Yeonghwas voice is icy cold as she stares blankly at her member
Misty hands it over with a smug smile. "You'll thank me later."
Yeonghwa snatches it out her hands, frantically opening her messages to see what damage Misty had done. Her eyes widen as she reads it. "You... you actually wrote something normal."
Yeonghwa: ‘Hi Yunho, it’s Yeonghwa. Sorry for the delay, we’ve been busy with tour prep. Are you still on for coffee? Let me know.’
"What, you thought I'd sabotage you?" Misty looks offended
"I literally just watched you try to type out a confession!"
"I wouldn't actually do that," she insists, her voice carrying a playful lilt despite the sincerity in her eyes. "Sure, I'd joke about it, just to watch you squirm - it's entertaining, after all! But I'd never really go through with it!" Her expression softens, a gentle understanding lighting up her features. "I understand how much Yunho means to you. He was your first love, the first real crush that made your heart race. He was your first kiss, and you shared something deeply intimate with him when you both lost your virginity to one another."
“Misty!!” Yeonghwa groans covering her face in embarrassment, “I should never have told you that!”
“Hey, I was your alibi for that night back in our dorm remember?” Misty giggles lightly pulling her hands away, “I had to sit in a cafe for 3 hours until you text to say Yunho was walking you home so we could walk into the dorm together as if we had been doing cardio practice like we told Haneul!”
Yeonghwa groans and drops her head onto Misty's shoulder. "Don't remind me. I thought I was going to have a heart attack when Haneul looked at me when we walked in. I thought she knew just by looking at me that I had just lost my virginity."
“Well your hair was looking particularly wild when got home!” Misty laughs, “It was when she asked why you were walking weird though and you told her without missing a beat you pulled a muscle doing a tricky position! I nearly died holding in my laughter at the ‘tricky position’.”
“Well I had just lost my virginity to a guy who made me realise the tall man, big feet myth was in fact very true!! Anyone would be walking funny after that!” Yeonghwa joins in with the laughter
“I guess technically your weren’t lying as a position is what gave you that injury!” Misty grins as their laughter dies down, "And for what it's worth, I never told anyone about catching you two in the practice room that time."
"Oh my god, I thought we both agreed to never discuss the practice room incident again," Yeonghwa whines, dropping her head into her hands. "I wanted to literally die when you walked in."
"Please, the look on Yunho's face was priceless. Like a kid with his hand in the cookie jar… or should I say, up your shirt." Misty wiggles her eyebrows suggestively.
"Stop!" Yeonghwa shoves her playfully. "I had just convinced him we wouldn't get caught. 'No one uses this practice room after ten,' I said. 'We'll be fine,' I said."
"And then BAM! Enter Misty, looking for her forgotten water bottle." Misty claps her hands together dramatically. "The way he jumped away from you like you were suddenly made of lava."
“It wasn’t like we were doing anything, just kissing!” Yeonghwa says chuckles despite herself feeling embarrassed again
"With his hand up your shirt and you sitting on his lap?" Misty raises an eyebrow. “And then tried to act all casual like, 'Oh, hey Misty, we were just... stretching.' A revolutionary new stretching technique," she adds with mock seriousness. "Highly effective for... certain muscles."
They both dissolve into laughter again, Yeonghwa's earlier anxiety momentarily forgotten as she leans against the practice room wall.
"God, we were so stupid back then," Yeonghwa sighs, wiping at her eyes. "Sneaking around, thinking we were so slick."
"You weren't slick at all," Misty snort. "Haneul and Jinni might not have caught on, but Areum and I knew something was up when you started wearing his hoodie to practice and claiming it was 'just something you picked up at a store’ and ‘was trying a new style.’"
"What?! You knew about that too?" Yeonghwa's jaw drops.
“Oh come on, the hoodie was like down to your knees and 3 times too big! It was obvious, except to Haneul and Jinni clearly!”
"Why didn't you say anything?" she asks
"Because unlike our company at the time, we weren't complete monsters." Misty's tone shifts slightly, a hint of the old anger surfacing. "And you were happy. Actually fucking happy for once, not just that plastic smile you'd put on for the cameras."
Yeonghwa swallows hard, looking down at her phone where the sent message to Yunho still sat unanswered.
“Look don’t worry about our company. They aren’t like our old one, there were many reasons we left when our contract renewal was up 2 years ago but how they treated you regarding the Yunho situation and refusing to get your mental health help was the deciding factor for Haneul that none of us were staying.”
“I’m sorry.” Yeonghwa says as Misty tilts her head and shoots her a confused look, “For getting involved with someone and putting everyone at risk, for… what I tried to do on that bridge and for causing you all to worry about me.”
“Don’t apologise for Yunho, you two loved one another. That is nothing to be sorry for! But you scared us all so much. Not just getting that call from the manager saying he’d just pulled you back from a railing but what happened afterwards. How despondent you were. You wouldn’t eat, sleep or even speak outside of work. When you were in work mode, you seemed like the cheerful girl we all knew, but the moment the cameras stopped rolling, you looked lifeless, completely dead inside."
“Misty…” she begins
“and I know you felt dead inside too. Do you think I'm not terrified of what might happen if you reconnect and things go wrong? I can't bear another call from a manager telling me you've tried to jump off a bridge again!" Misty exhales deeply, "Or something even worse!"
Yeonghwa places her phone on the floor and crawls over to Misty, hugging her tightly. “I promise you, that will never happen again. I am stronger than I was back then.”
“I know you are but I’ll always worry about you. You are my little baby!” she replies
Suddenly, Yeonghwa's phone buzzes on the floor. Both girls froze, staring at it like it might explode.
“It’s him!” Yeonghwa whispers looking at the notification on her lock screen
"Well, fucking open it!" Misty hisses, crowding over her shoulder.
With trembling fingers, Yeonghwa unlocks her phone.
Yunho: 'Hey Yeonghwa! No worries, I understand you're busy. We have been the same. How about today at 3? There's a little place near our company building in Mapo -gu called Bean There. I think your new company building is in Mapo-gu too? They have private booths in the back that I can book if today suits but I am happy to go wherever you want and what makes you most comfortable.'
Misty snatches the phone again, scanning the message. "Bean There? Isn't that place like, stupidly expensive?"
"Give it back!" Yeonghwa grabs for her phone, nearly toppling over in the process. "And yes, it is. They have those rooms that people who want privacy can use."
"Ooooh, privacy," Misty wiggles her eyebrows suggestively. "So he wants to get you alone, huh?"
"It's not like that!" Yeonghwa slaps her arm. "It's so we don't get caught by fans, you perv."
"Sure, sure. So what are you going to say?"
Yeonghwa stares at her phone, chewing her lip. "I don't know... is it too soon to see him again?"
"For fuck's sake, Hwa! You've waited a week and like 2 years!!" Misty says, “Type something before I do it for you, and this time I promise it’ll be embarrassing!”
Yeonghwa huffs and begins typing.
Yeonghwa: ‘Today would be ideal, but could we schedule it for a bit later in the evening? My day is packed with rehearsals that will keep me busy until the late afternoon, but I'll be free after 7 pm.’
“Happy?” she says to Misty
“Ecstatic!!” Misty grins and within seconds a reply comes back, “Someones keen!”
“Shut up!” Yeonghwa replies but she can’t stop the smile coming to her face and warmth in her chest, “He’s asking if 8pm suits.”
“Gives you time to get a shower and put some clothes on that aren’t sweats or leggings, dress yourself up for him!”
“Oh that isn’t happening - shower hell yes but dressing up nope! The aim is to be as low key as possible and not pull attention to the fact 2 idols are having coffee together.” she says typing out another reply.
“Correction 1 idol and koreas princess!” Misty grins
“Fuck off!” Yeonghwa mumbles kicking her legs in Mistys direction. Yunhos reply comes quickly
Yunho: ‘I’ll get the coffee place booked for 8pm. Looking forward to it! ☺️’
Yeonghwa let out a breath she didn't realise she'd been holding. "He sent a smiley face too."
"Scandalous," Misty said dryly.
"No, but... that's good, right? He's not just doing this out of obligation or to like tell me how much he hates me?"
Misty grabs Yeonghwa by the shoulders. "Hwa… the man almost threw hands with his best friend over you. He's not meeting you for coffee in a ridiculously expensive cafe to give you a lecture on how you ruined his life."
“But what if-”
“If you say ‘what if’ one more fucking time, I’ll tell Jinni you ate her strawberry cake and blamed the manager for throwing it out.”
Yeonghwa gasps, “You wouldn’t dare!”
“Try me!” Misty challenges, “Now instead of overthinking this, why don’t we figure out what you are going to wear before the others arrive and we need to start this rehearsal.”
A smile tugs at Yeonghwa's lips. "Fine. But nothing too obvious! I want to blend in, not stand out which is already hard enough with this red hair!"
“I have you!” Misty smiles softly
Yeonghwa feels a slight calmness wash over her. Excited to see Yunho again but also worried as Hongjoongs words ‘stay away from him’ repeat at the back of her head.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
Yunho places his phone on the table next to the computer and multiple cups of coffee as everyone begins their warm up routines in the practice hall. A smile on his face at finally hearing from Yeonghwa. He knew she was busy as their world tour was starting soon so figured her delay in messaging him was down to that but at the same time, he was scared she would never message him. Since that night after the award show he had thought nonstop about her.
Finally allowing himself to think of her after so long made him remember all their good memories together. But it also opened up the pain once more. He knew Yeonghwa wasn’t a cruel person, despite what Mingi and the others would say about her. She wasn’t bad or evil, or even selfish! He had witnessed first hand how caring, kind, thoughtful, sensitive and selfless she was. The others just never knew her really.
When the message from the unknown number came up on his phone, his heart had skipped not one but 3 beats! He just couldn’t wait any longer to see her and after their dance rehearsal this morning and afternoon, he was free of all schedules for the day which is why he suggested today. Plus he knew that in 5 days Moonlight were having their opening concert of the tour in Seoul then flying to America for 3 months, so she would be very busy. As was he as they were flying out for a tour soon too.
As Yunho turns around in his seat, he notices his flushed face in the mirrored wall and saw Mingi and Wooyoung's eyes on him. "Ooh, Yunho's blushing!" Wooyoung exclaims loudly.
"Shut up!" Yunho retorts, pulling his hoodie over his head to hide his embarrassment.
“What’s got you blushing like a school boy?” San joins in with the teasing
“No one.. I mean nothing!!” Yunho defends, his voice a little louder than he expected
"Yunho's got a cruuuush," San sings, stretching out the word and shimmying his shoulders towards Yunho.
"I do not!" Yunho protested, but the flush on his cheeks has spread to his ears.
Mingi, who has been silently watching from the corner, suddenly speaks up. "It's her, isn't it?"
The playful atmosphere evaporates instantly. Wooyoung freezes, and San's teasing smile falters.
Mingi's jaw tightens. "Yeonghwa."
The name fell like a stone into still water. Hongjoong, who had been adjusting the music, turns around slowly.
"Is it?" Wooyoung asks, his voice suddenly serious as he looks at Yunho.
"Yes, it was Yeonghwa. No, I don’t have a crush on her, and we're going for coffee," Yunho replies, turning around.
"Coffee," Yeosang repeats flatly from where he was tying his shoes.
"Yes, coffee. Does anyone have a problem with that?" Yunho snaps, sounding more defensive than he wanted.
Mingi scoffs. "After everything she did to you—"
"You don't know shit about what happened between us," Yunho says, his voice dangerously low.
"I know enough," Mingi shoots back. "I know I was the one who had to pick up the pieces when she destroyed you."
Yunho takes a step toward him. "Watch it."
"Or what?" Mingi challenged. "You gonna push me again? Over her?"
Seonghwa, who had been silent until now, steps between them. "Let's all just calm down. We have rehearsals in five minutes, and Yunho's personal life is his business."
“Remember we said we wouldn’t get involved when it came to the two of them.” Jongho says
“Unless it affects the group!” Hongjoong says, “We cannot have a repeat of what happened at the award show, and we absolutely cannot have you two fighting either! So Mingi, when it comes to Yeonghwa I don’t want to hear any of your opinions anymore, you keep them to yourself!!” his tone suddenly gets harsher, “And Yunho, stop being so argumentative when it comes to her!”
Both Mingi and Yunho look at one another before looking at their leader.
“Sorry hyung.” Yunho mumbles
“Yeah sorry.” Mingi says
“Don’t say sorry to me!!” Hongjoong says, “I want you both to focus on our practice because some of us have other schedules today and I don’t want to hear another word about Yeonghwa for the rest of the day either!”
Everyone nods and gets themselves ready. A few hours pass by with no further issues or conflict. When they are finished, they go their separate ways while Hongjoong stays at the company to work in his studio. Seonghwa stays behind, sensing something was wrong… more than usual leader stress and the situation between Yunho and Mingi.
"Aren't you heading home?" Hongjoong asks upon spotting Seonghwa in the hallway as he makes his way to his studio.
"Not yet. I wanted to get some more practice in," Seonghwa replies, "but I also wanted to have a private talk with you."
"Come to my studio," Hongjoong responds with a nod.
They walk quietly down the corridor. Seonghwa notices the tension in Hongjoong's entire demeanour, his pale complexion, and dark-rimmed eyes. It's evident to everyone that he's stressed, and Seonghwa knows the situation isn't making things easier. Once inside the small studio, Hongjoong drops his bag in a corner and takes a seat at the desk, while Seonghwa settles onto the small sofa.
“Is everything okay?” Hongjoong asks, keeping his tone straightforward and practical.
“That is what I wanted to ask you,” Seonghwa responds with empathy, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just busy.” he replies in his usual straightforward manner.
“I mean about this whole Yunho and Mingi situation, not to mention Yunho and Yeonghwa!” Seonghwa says
Hongjoong lets out a long sigh and leans back into his chair, closing his eyes and running a hand through his hair. Seonghwa can see the effect it is having on him.
“I don’t know what I am going to do with the two of them. I’ve never seen them speak this way to one another before,” he mumbles with a sense of responsibility, “Out of everyone those two have always been at the bottom of my list to have issues with one another. I always knew I didn’t need to worry about them in that sense. But this? Arguing, fighting? It isn’t them!”
“I know.” Seonghwa nods leaning back on the sofa, "Perhaps we should arrange a proper discussion with them, rather than snatching brief conversations backstage after awards shows or before practice when emotions are running high."
“That’s probably our best option,” he replies, “Mingi has way too many opinions of Yeonghwa - some are warranted but most aren’t. Fuck, Seonghwa… the way he looked at her last week and the way he spoke to her... she looked terrified! It gave me chills, and it wasn't even aimed at me."
"I never really considered how she must have felt witnessing all that," Seonghwa says softly.
Hongjoong sighs once more, “I don’t think I helped matters either and I’m worried it will affect Yunho more.”
“What do you mean?” Seonghwa asks, noticing the conflict on Hongjoongs face
“After I sent Mingi and Yunho back to the waiting room… I spoke to her.” he slowly says, his hands rubbing at his face
Seonghwa stops himself from asking what he said to her, he can see how troubled Hongjoong is by this and decides to let him speak at his own pace and just listen to him. A short silence fills the small room.
“Firstly, I wouldn’t let Yunho talk to her. I told him… no I ordered him to say goodbye as he tried to apologise to her for how Mingi spoke to her… pretty sure he wanted to push me too at that. I think my leader position saved me.” Hongjoong lets out a small breathy laugh, an attempt to release some of the tension from his body and the room.
“Your leader position has saved you a few times… mostly from the wrath of Wooyoung and Jongho!” Seonghwa chuckles and Hongjoongs shoulders relax a bit as he smiles
“Yeah!” he nods, “Anyway, after Yunho left I reminded her of what she said to him when she broke up with him - to ‘leave her alone’… and I told her to do the same to him. I was just so angry looking at her. All my old feelings came back.”
Seonghwa can’t stop the grimace on his face.
“In my defence I didn’t know he’d asked her for coffee and she’d agreed!” he adds quickly
“Joong… how were you supposed to know that? You walked into Yunho and Mingi practically fighting in a public space, had to deal with that situation then you saw her. I don’t know if I could have held my tongue either.” Seonghwa says, “Seeing Yunho in such pain was awful. Fuck, even just remembering seeing him so broken, lying in bed, his eyes empty and then when he disappeared in the middle of the night. Those 5 days we didn’t know where he was were terrifying!”
“Finding him in that motel, drunk and gaunt was the worst. At least the company got him help and a good therapist! I dread to think what could have happened if they didn’t.” Hongjoong replies solemnly as Seonghwa nods slowly.
Both of them knew how close to the edge he was and their company looking after him so well during a vulnerable time was one of the reasons Yunho didn’t walk away.
“Anyway when I looked at her and all I saw was that image of him in that dirty motel, surrounded by empty bottles of alcohol, just looking so dead inside. I was angry at her once more but had to keep reminding myself where I was and who she is. She may be the girl who broke him but she is also a well respected idol and a sunbaenim.” Hongjoong says, “What if my telling her to stay away from him hurts him? He’s already asked us to back off when it comes to her. What if he finds out what I said and hates me for meddling?”
“There are too many what ifs in the world when it comes to Yunho and Yeonghwa. You will drive yourself mad asking them and looking for an answer. All we can do is be there for him, no matter what happens today or afterwards.” Seonghwa replies
“And find a way to gag Mingi at the same time?” Hongjoong says making Seonghwa laugh lightly
“That too!” he replies, “Look if Yunho finds out you spoke to her and tried to warn her off, just explain that it was after you saw the two giants fighting in public and before he told us they were meeting for coffee. He’ll understand.”
“Will he?” Hongjoong asks, “When it comes to Yeonghwa, he is blinded and so defensive. If anyone dares bring her up, you see how he gets.”
“He’ll have to understand.” Seonghwa says, “Maybe you should tell him, explain it was before you knew they’d agreed to coffee and we’d agreed to back off.”
Hongjoong can only nod. A silence falls over the pair, as they both contemplate what could happen.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
The room is small and inviting, featuring soft lighting, cushioned seating, fairy lights adorning the walls and ceiling, and a small table with fresh flowers in the middle. It offers complete privacy, which is exactly what Yunho needed. He understood the importance of ensuring that no one spotted her or noticed them together. He needed the freedom to talk with her without the worry of being observed or overheard.
Every sound from outside the room makes his heart race, wondering if it's her arrival. He glances at his phone to check the time: 8:19 pm. The possibility of being stood up enters his mind, prompting him to take a long sip from one of the bottles of water he ordered. His knee bounces anxiously, causing the small table to tremble slightly. How long should he wait? If she is indeed standing him up, what's a reasonable amount of time to stay? He checks his phone again: 8:23 pm, and a feeling of dread washes over him as he adjusts the baseball cap on his head.
Suddenly, the door in the corner slides open, revealing a petite figure clad in jeans and a black hoodie pulled over their head, with a black face mask covering their face. He rises swiftly, nearly toppling the table laden with bottles of water, assorted cakes he had chosen, and two iced americanos. A streak of vivid red hair slips out from under the hoodie as the mask is taken off, revealing her face. Yeonghwa was standing infront of him - finally!
“I am so sorry I am late!” she huffs
Her face is flushed and she is trying to catch her breath, it was clear to Yunho that she had ran here as she clutches her side. He quickly moves to the other side of the table and pulls her chair out for her.
“Jinni kept asking me to show her my spin jump and to break down how I do it.” she continues as she sits down and he passes a bottle of water to her
"It's alright!" he says with a smile, settling back into his own seat.
"I don't even know why she was asking as when it comes to jumps, kicks, and handstands she has the same coordination and control as a bag in the wind!!" Yeonghwa says, rolling her eyes as she pulls her hood down, her long red hair cascading around her shoulder. Yunho can’t help but laugh at her description. "And sorry for looking such a mess! I didn't have time to shower, just a quick spritz of deodorant and a change of clothes," she adds, glancing at him.
Yunho's smile widens as he looks at her. He feels happy and calm in her presence, the stress from the earlier argument with the guys melting away as he watches her run her fingers through her hair, trying to smooth it out.
He relaxes feeling relief that she hadn’t stood him up and was merely late, as he removes his hat. "You look good… amazing as ever!"
She puts her bag on the floor, eyeing the spread before her. "Did you order the entire menu?"
"Only the best parts," he replies with a shrug, sliding an iced americano toward her. "Still your favourite, right?"
She accepts it, their fingers briefly touching. "You remembered." Her eyes go wide as she looks up at him.
“Hard to forget when you ordered one every day at school!” he laughs, “And told me it was the ‘nectar of the gods’ and how hot coffee is ‘inferior in every way’!”
“I still stand by the nectar of the gods statement but don’t tell anyone this… I sometimes drink hot coffee now.” she whispers dramatically
“Your secret is safe with me.” he whispers back
They share a laugh and exchange glances, feeling the warmth of reuniting but also the nervousness about what lay ahead. The unavoidable conversation about their breakup loomed, with the potential to uncover even deeper wounds.
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(AN: I just wanted to add a note at the bottom instead of at the top so as not to spoil anything for this chapter. I wanted to make a point of showing the difference in the Yeonghwa old company and KQ in how they handled the aftermath of the break up. Yeonghwas company ignored that she needed professional help especially after her attempt, instead focusing on covering up her injuries and force her to work. While KQ got Yunho into therapy and helped him. Although I am touching on these moments to build the story up, I will be going more in depth into those moments in later chapters but KQ also gave Yunho time off while Yeonghwa was forced to work the following day. Also her old company was one of the big 4 - I will not be saying which one!)
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<m.list> ⋆ <next>
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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Just a reminder that darker fics, anything with dub-con, non-con, stalking, murder or any of that shit has to be properly tagged. If you don't do it in the tags, at least do it in the content warnings
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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!Callouts!
Warnings; a lot of foul language will be said, mention of non consensual things, cult behavior, if I missed anything at ALL let me know and i’ll correct it.
I don’t give a fuck. Y’all can suck my dick if you support this bitch. Not to mention, I’m pretty sure half of her followers are minors. She’s producing porn for minors. That’s absolutely disgusting and I don’t give a fuck what mental problem you have, that’s unacceptable and inexcusable.
Fics I’ve seen from her
Teachers pet
This is literally coerced sex, does it have the right tag for it? No, of course it doesn’t. The tag that belongs with this blog should be dubcon/noncon/cnc
Pretty flushed
Quite literally mentions rape, and implies coerced things.
Behaviors
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Now, see where it says “imagine if someone even called this a cult”? She yet implied it was joke in her pinned post, but yet gets offended? Make that make sense Valerie, how are you gonna get offended when YOU yourself invited this behavior? “Our bunny kingdom” sounds like a cult behavior to me. And nobody is your fuckin bunny, dude.
What got me involved
Showing my moot when she did NOTHING but voice her opinion, and yet YOU alone went and posted a personal message that you two shared. Grow up. I tolerate a lot of things, but shit to my moots when they did nothing? Fuck you, a huge genuine fuck you.
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You didnt lose anything? Yet you deliberately violated her privacy in another post. Opinions change, she changed her opinion about you. Grow up, accept it.
Also, using your mental health does NOT excuse your behavior, using your followers DO NOT excuse your behavior. You are genuinely fucked in the head, using war as well? People died in that war. And you’re using this for what? Pettiness instead of outright saying you made a mistake? Big yikes on you. You should really be ashamed of yourself, right now. That’s pretty sad that people younger than you are more mature than this.
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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are you planning to update on i can see you soon ??
Hi! Yes, this will be updated soon. I don’t have a strict writing schedule, just when I can but I have half of chapter 3 written already.
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silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
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TWENTY-FOUR: worries and truths told
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Warnings: talks of anxiety, bipolar disorder, mental health, medication, no explicit details but one mention of past suicide attempt and self harm scars, swearing, suggestive language, brief description of sex
Word Count: 13.7k
Summary: The 9 of them return from LA, and while they are all happy to be home, Luna is worried about her relationship with one of them, prompting another member to reveal his past to her. The following day, her anxiety increases when Hongjoong, Yunho, and Seonghwa want to talk to her.
{banners by @cafekitsune}
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The apartment was a welcome sight as the 9 of them walked into it. The flight home had gone without issues, no panic attacks. Luna took her medication as promised, she sat beside Wooyoung who kept her distracted with games on his ipad, food and movies.
“I’m so hungry!” groans San making his way straight to the pantry to get a snack
“Me too,” Mingi agrees, flopping down onto the sofa. “I could eat an entire pizza by myself.”
“Pizza sounds amazing,” Luna says, dropping her bag onto the floor and face planting onto her now favourite corner on the sofa, the one that is closest to her bedroom door. “But it’s so late. Are places even still delivering?”
“Leave that to me,” Hongjoong says with a smirk, pulling out his phone. “I know a place that delivers 24/7. What do you guys want?”
Everyone starts shouting what they want as Hongjoong tries to write it down on his phone. Hongjoong nods as he types away, jotting down everyone's orders. "So we have 3 large pizzas, Kimchi stew, tteokbokki, japchae, pajeon, and fried chicken... anything else?" He glances around at the group.
Wooyoung rubs his stomach as it growls, "I think that should be enough for now. We can always make some ramyeon later if we're still hungry." He turns to Luna with a smile. "Anything else you want, jagiya?”
“No, just some pizza will do me.” she replies moving her head to the side so it was no longer buried in the plush cushion
“Okay, I’ll get this ordered. Everyone should go get changed and washed up before it arrives.” Hongjoong says walking into the kitchen
Everyone begins to make their way to their separate rooms but Yeosang lingers, though, his eyes never leaving Luna. She’s still on the sofa but she’s sitting upright now, her legs tucked under her as she scrolls through her phone. He walks over, sitting down beside her as she looks up at him with a fond smile. “Hey Sangie.”
“I missed you,” he says quietly, reaching out to brush some hair behind her ear. His touch is gentle, but there’s an undercurrent of something deeper, something he’s been holding onto.
Luna eyes are soft. “Missed you too,” she whispers back.
Before she can say anything else, Yeosang leans in, his lips meeting hers in a kiss that’s both tender and hungry. It’s been too long since they’ve had a moment like this, just the two of them, their last kiss being in the gym on their first morning in LA and he can’t help but pour everything he’s been feeling into it. Luna melts into the kiss, her fingers curling into his shirt as if to hold him closer.
Yeosang's lips press against Luna's, his kiss growing more intense as he grips her hips and draws her onto his lap. She feels the heat radiating from his body and the power of his hold, sending a shiver down her spine. It's been ages since they shared a moment like this, just the two of them, completely absorbed in one another. They kiss with a fervour as if they are each other's lifeline, filled with longing and urgency. Yeosang's lips travel along Luna's jaw to her ear, whispering sweet words in Korean.
"I missed this," he whispers, his voice filled with emotion. "I couldn't stop thinking about you."
Luna shivers as his warm breath caresses her skin. "I missed it too," she admits softly, her fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. "So much."
Yeosang pulls back slightly to look at Luna's face. Her cheeks are flushed a pretty pink, her lips swollen from their kisses. He tucks strands of now messy hair behind her ear tenderly.
"You look absolutely beautiful," he whispers with admiration before leaning in for a more gently kiss. Luna smiles into it, feeling a surge of happiness from his kind words. Despite being convinced she looks far from her best after the long flight, she appreciates the compliment nonetheless.
In the kitchen, Hongjoong is on the phone placing their large food order while San and Mingi help themselves to drinks from the fridge. They glance over at Yeosang and Luna softly kissing on the sofa but wisely choose not to interrupt their moment.
“They look cute together.” Mingi says
"They really do," San agrees with a smile, "though it's still strange to see Yeosang being so affectionate!" he adds.
"Not as strange as seeing Jongho kissing, though!" Mingi chimes in.
"Yeah…wait, what?" San asks his eyes widen, turning to Mingi, who just grins and makes a lock-and-key gesture with his lips and fingers.
Back on the sofa, Yeosang and Luna finally break their kiss, their foreheads resting against each other as they catch their breath. Luna looks into Yeosang's eyes, a soft smile playing on her lips.
"How did we get so lucky?" Yeosang murmurs, reaching up to cup her cheek. "To have you here with us, for you to pick us…"
Luna leans into his touch, nuzzling against his palm. "I'm the lucky one," she insists quietly smiling at him
Luna leans against Yeosang cuddling into him as she feels the warm of his body. He feels his heart skip a beat at being so close to her again after their trip.
Just then, Hongjoong shouts from the kitchen to everyone. "Ya, food's on the way!"
“We should get ourselves changed.” Yeosang whispers, his forehead pressed against the side of her head
“5 more minutes.” she replies with a slight pout
Yeosang's smile widens, unable to refuse her request. Her pouty face and big brown doe eyes were irresistible, but even without them, he found it impossible to deny anything she wished from him. The thought of spending just five more minutes cradling her in his arms felt like a slice of heaven to him, a moment he wanted to savour for a bit longer.
"You're way too cute when you pout like that," Yeosang murmurs, tucking some hair behind her ear. "It's actually unfair."
"You're not exactly innocent when it comes to getting your way either." Luna teases, poking his chest.
"Me?" Yeosang feigns offence, his hand clutching his chest dramatically. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Luna raises an eyebrow at him. "Oh really? Because I distinctly remember someone getting Yunho to cut dance practice short last week with nothing but a pout and puppy eyes."
Yeosang's dramatic face melts into a laugh as he remembers. "Okay, that was different."
"Different how?" Luna grins, shifting to face him better.
“We'd been practising for six hours straight and my legs felt like jelly.” he replies
"You literally went 'Hyuuuung' with those big eyes of yours and he caved in like two seconds flat."
"Hey, I earned that power. Do you know how many years it took to perfect that pout?" He runs his thumb along her jawline, still chuckling. "Besides, Yunho is always been weak for my big eyes."
"You're ridiculous," Luna says fondly, leaning into his touch.
"Says the one who just used her own big eyes for five more minutes with me," he teases, his lips ghost over hers
“I don’t see you putting up a fight.” she whispers
“As if I could, angel.” he replies before capturing her lips
They stay like this for a few more minutes before finally and very reluctantly leaving each others arms. Yeosang gives her a lingering hug before retreating from the lounge for his room as she walks to hers
As Luna walks into her room, she feels a wave of calm wash over her. The familiar surroundings are like a balm to her soul after the stresses of the trip. She takes a moment to just breathe in the peace and comfort of being back home.
Moving quickly, Luna changes into a pair of soft cotton shorts and a long sleeved night shirt. She uses makeup remover wipes to clean off the day's worth of makeup and travel from her face.
The flight home was smoother than the one to LA. She noticed the guys were subtly watching her, clearly having discussed their plans beforehand. When Hongjoong asked who she'd prefer to sit beside, it confirmed her suspicions. Their actions at the hotel and in the private lounge were too well-coordinated to be spontaneous. She wasn't annoyed; she appreciated their discreet care and felt relieved not to worry about anything.
Luna always struggled with letting others care for her, as she was used to looking after everyone else - her friends, previous boyfriends, and her old work colleagues. Yet, she enjoyed the change of not having to worry all the time. Her Grandma Park called her an 'old soul' for her nurturing nature.
On the flight home, she insisted on keeping the seats the same which meant her flight partner this time was Wooyoung and secretly she was over the moon with that. Not that she wouldn’t have liked any of the others sitting beside her but she had spent the least time with Wooyoung while in LA and had missed him a lot.
She took her anti anxiety medication an hour before boarding, she was calm as the flight took off.
Wrapped in a new kuromi blanket from Seonghwa, with Wooyoung's hand in hers under the blanket and the amethyst crystal in the other, she listened to a playlist Hongjoong made on new headphones Mingi had bought her after he overheard her mention to Hyunsik her current ones weren’t holding their charge for long and the bracelet from Jongho on her wrist.They were surrounding her in one way or another and it was providing more comfort to her.
The rest of the flight consisted of a movie with Wooyoung, which he fell asleep during, eating, playing games on his ipad, sleeping, and eating some more before it was time for landing.
Luna finishes washing her face, she grabs her spare glasses from the nightstand and ties her long hair up into a messy bun on top of her head before going back into the lounge. No one was there but she could see Yunho, Seonghwa, San and Mingi were in the kitchen.
As she enters, Yunho turns and immediately opens his arms, offering a warm hug. She all but runs into his arms, savouring being able to hug him without worry. "Hey, little one!” he smiles
Luna mirrors his smile, feeling the soothing comfort of his hug wrap around her like a cosy blanket. "It's so good to be home," she replies, her voice brimming with genuine happiness and relief.
“You feeling okay?” he inquires softly, his tone gentle and caring. “No side effects from your anxiety medication?” his voice lowering to a tender whisper, “Or your other meds?” he adds even more quietly, his concern evident.
“Just a bit tired, like everyone else,” she reassures him, gazing up into his eyes with a hint of fatigue but an undeniable spark of contentment. “But I am fine!”
Yunho bends down and lightly kisses her lips, causing her to relax into him further. He places his hand gently on the small of her back to steady her as she goes onto her tiptoes, her arms moving to his shoulder.
"Oi, get a room!" Wooyoung calls out teasingly as he walks into the kitchen.
“You are just jealous!” Yunho replies playfully
“I don’t need to be jealous because I had her all to myself for twelve glorious hours,” Wooyoung smirks
Luna laughs, pulling away from Yunho as she turns around in his arms so her back was now pressed against him, her hands holding onto his arms that are still wrapped around her. "Oh yeah, except for the 5 hours to fell asleep and drooled on my shoulder!"
"I did not drool!" Wooyoung protests
"Oh you absolutely did," San chimes in. "I have the evidence on my phone!"
"You delete that right now!" he shouts
Yunho presses a kiss to the side of her head as they laugh at Wooyoung chasing San around the kitchen for his phone. The others begin to filter into the kitchen while Seonghwa starts cleaning the kitchen island. Luna makes her rounds, giving each of them hugs and kisses. When she reaches Jongho, he abruptly turns his back to her and rushes to the other side of the kitchen.
She is somewhat surprised by his behaviour. She had anticipated that he wouldn't be overly affectionate once they returned home and were surrounded by others, but she wasn’t expecting to be completely ignored like that. Since he left his hotel room that morning to go to hair and make up, he hadn’t looked at or even spoken to her. Not even on the photoshoot. Initially she thought it was just him being professional but they were home now… in their safe place, the one place in the world they were free to be themselves but he just turned his back on her.
Suddenly, she feels arms encircle her, drawing her attention away from Jongho's back. Without even glancing up, she knew it was Mingi; his hugs had become very familiar to her.
“You okay princess?” he asks.
Mingi was always good at picking up on subtle emotions, so he easily noticed the slight drop in her expression when Jongho turned away. She rests her head against his chest and nods while the others move around them.
"Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?" he offers gently, his voice soothing to her.
"Can I?" she asks quietly, gripping the back of his black hoodie tightly.
"You never have to ask that, princess!" he responds, kissing the top of her head.
Luna finds herself looking at Jongho once more, feeling a bit rejected as he remains with his back turned to her. The sound of the doorbell jolts her from her thoughts.
"The food’s here!" Hongjoong exclaims, rushing to the door.
"Ya, make sure you have your wallet this time!" Seonghwa shouts after him. "I’m not paying for you again."
"That only happened once!" Hongjoong retorts, already fishing out money from his pocket.
“Three times actually!” Wooyoung counters as Hongjoong rolls his eyes
They gather around the kitchen island, perching on the bar stools around it with various food containers spread out across the surface. The smell of delicious food fills the apartment as everyone digs in, the exhaustion from the flight momentarily forgotten in favour of satisfying their hunger.
"Stop stealing my wings," Wooyoung whines, swatting at Yeosang's chopsticks.
"You've had like six already," Yeosang retorts, successfully nabbing another piece.
"I counted and it was four, you thief!"
Luna is squeezed between Seonghwa and Mingi, taking small bites of her pizza slice while attempting to avoid glancing at Jongho, who has seated himself at the opposite end of the island. He hasn't looked in her direction, silently consuming his meal. It felt as though he intentionally sat as far from her as possible, which made her heart ache.
"Here," Seonghwa says quietly, sliding some of his chicken onto her plate. He always knew she liked extra.
“You should have it!” she replies trying to give it back but he holds up his hand
“I am nearly full and put too much on my plate!” he says “Take it before Yeosang and Wooyoung start fighting over it.” he whispers with a playful tone
“Thanks Hwa.” she smiles at him and leans over to kiss him
“Yeosang!!” Wooyoung shouts leaning across and pulling the container of chicken wings away from him
“Stop!” Yeosang lunges across the counter, nearly knocking over Mingi’s drink in the process.
"Careful!" Seonghwa scolds, steadying the glass. "I just cleaned this counter."
"Again with the cleaning," Wooyoung rolls his eyes. "We literally just got home."
"Some of us prefer not to live in filth," Seonghwa retorts, eyeing the sauce dripping down Wooyoung's chin.
Luna watches the chaos unfold with a small giggle, feeling warmth spread through her chest despite Jongho's continued silence at the end of the counter. She leans into Mingi's side, taking another bite of her pizza as Wooyoung and Yeosang continue their wrestling match over the chicken wings.
As the meal comes to an end, empty containers are scattered across the counter while Seonghwa and Yunho begin tidying up, urging everyone to head to bed. Luna notices Jongho casting a brief look in her direction before he swiftly turns away and heads up the stairs. Mingi takes her hand, his fingers naturally weaving between hers.
"Lets go upstairs," Mingi says softly, tugging her hand as she follows him to his bedroom. As soon as they walk in, Mingi closes the door and they slip under the covers. It is warm and comfortable and Luna instantly feels calmer.
"C'mere," he murmurs, pulling her close. His lips find hers in the darkness, soft and reassuring. She melts into him, grateful for his warmth, his steadiness.
“God I’ve missed this!” she sighs as their lips part and they get cosy.
“Me too princess.” he replies
They fall into a comfortable silence, Mingi's hands still moving soothingly across her back. He can feel the tension slowly leaving her body, but there's still something there, something unsaid.
"I can literally hear your brain overthinking from here," Mingi murmurs against her hair, his hand still running up and down her back. “You were a little quiet during dinner too.”
Luna shifts against him. "That obvious, huh?"
"You're about as subtle as Wooyoung trying to steal food." He pokes her side gently as she giggles lightly. "What’s going on inside your pretty little head, princess?"
She sighs lightly, burying her face in his chest. "Just tired."
"Bullshit," he says fondly. "But I won't push you."
They lay in comfortable quietness for a few minutes before Luna speaks up again. "How the hell do you manage to be this warm? Are you actually part furnace?"
Mingi snorts. "It's a gift. Though San always claimed I was stealing all his body heat when we shared hotel rooms."
"Poor San," Luna laughs softly
“I swear he was just using it as an excuse to steal my hoodies!”
Luna hums against his chest. "Speaking of theft, did you see Wooyoung's face when Yeosang stole that last wing?"
"I thought he was going to flip the entire counter," Mingi chuckles. "Though I'm pretty sure Seonghwa would've murdered them both if they messed up his pristine kitchen."
"God forbid anyone leave a crumb out of place," Luna says before mimicking Seonghwa's stern voice. "Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants!"
Mingi's chest rumbles with laughter. "That was frighteningly accurate. Have you been practising your Seonghwa impressions?"
"Maybe." She pokes his ribs. "Don't you dare tell him though."
"Your secret's safe with me, princess." He kisses her forehead. "Did Wooyoung really drool on you on the plane?"
"Oh yeah. He kept nodding off during the movie and his head would just..." Luna demonstrates by letting her head loll dramatically to the side. "At one point he mumbled something about jellybeans and was like trying to eat my shoulder."
Mingi bursts out laughing loudly. "Please tell me San got that on video."
"Pretty sure he got the whole thing. Wooyoung's going to die when he sees it."
"Oh we will play it at every possible opportunity," Mingi grins, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Company dinner? Christmas party? Maybe even his future wedding?"
“You’re evil!” she laughs
"Nah, just opportunistic. Besides, he's still holding onto that video of me walking into the glass door when we filmed that thing a couple of months ago.”
"Yeah he showed it to me! To be fair, it was pretty spectacular. You just..." Luna gestures vaguely with her hands. "Bounced."
"I did not bounce!" Mingi protests, though he's fighting back a smile. "I gracefully... rebounded."
“Well that is what will happen when you wear sunglasses indoors in a well lit place while trying to look cool on camera.” she laughs, “However, it was rather impressive!”
“I just hope they won’t add it to the final edit!” he groans playfully
“Oh you know they 100% will!” she lifts her head to look at him, her chin resting on his chest
“I know!” he simply replies looking at her
“I can’t wait to watch the show though when it gets aired. It sounded so fun to film. The games you played, you and Yunho sleeping overnight in a car!!” she giggles
“It really was!” he smiles, “But also weird to have done something so recently that you weren’t there for, before we even knew someone as special as you even existed in this world, never mind in the same city as us.” he places a kiss on her forehead, “It feels like you’ve always been here.”
“I feel the same with you guys.” she replies softly. She trusts them, all of them. “The reason I was quiet earlier was because I was a little caught off guard by J-Jongho.”
Mingi holds her tighter in his arms, her fingers play with the toggle on his hoodie as he allows her the time to continue when she is ready.
“I know that I shouldn’t be!” she says resting her head on his chest once more, “He doesn’t like skinship, especially infront of you and I know that but…” she trails off
“You thought after he was affectionate with you in LA that it would be the same at home?” Mingi finishes
“Stupid isn’t it?” she sighs
"Not stupid at all," Mingi says, his fingers absently playing with her hair. "Jongho's like... imagine being a 40-year-old man in a 22-year-old's body."
Luna laughs lightly against his chest. "That's oddly specific."
"Remember when he lectured San for like 10 minutes for putting his feet on the coffee table? He sounded exactly like my dad." Mingi chuckles, then his voice softens. "But you know what? I've never seen him smile the way he did in LA. When he was with you... it was like watching him finally act his age."
"Really?" Luna asks quietly, picking at a loose thread on Mingi's hoodie.
"Oh yeah. You should've seen how happy he looked after that kiss as we were going to hair and make up. Practically skipping, he was on cloud 9 from that kiss!"
Luna groans, burying her face in his chest. "Stop." but she can’t help smile at the memory of their kisses in LA and the way her stomach fluttered.
"I'm serious! He was practically floating. Even started whistling as the stylist did his make up - and let me tell you, that never happens! But hey," Mingi nudges her gently, "give him time. He's probably still processing the fact that someone managed to crack through his 'everything must be perfectly organised including my emotions' exterior. You basically turned his whole world upside down - in the best way possible."
Luna sighs. "I just... I don't want him to feel uncomfortable."
“You could never make anyone uncomfortable!” Mingi hugs her tighter, his fingers continuing to run through her hair soothingly. "Jongho may act tough, but he's a big softie deep down. He cares about you a lot, even if he struggles to show it sometimes."
Luna looks up at Mingi with a small smile. "You really think so?"
“Absolutely!” Mingi replies with confidence, "Hey... anything else on your mind, princess?"
"I'm good," she says softly. "Just tired from the flight and my tummy is really full from all the food I ate on the plane and tonight!” she adds rubbing her stomach
“A little food baby?” Mingi asks with a grin
“More like a big food baby!” she laughs, “Look at it!” she adds lifting her nightshirt enough to reveal her visibly bloated stomach “I look like I have a real baby in there!”
“Then lets get ready for bed.” he smiles, “Come on, teeth brushing time!”
“Nooo,” she groans, “I am too tired to go downstairs and get my toothbrush.” Her grip on Mingi under the covers tightens as if refusing to leave the bed
“Ah but princess,” he kisses her nose “…there is already a brand new toothbrush in the shared bathroom especially for you.”
“Really?” she looks at him
“Yunho got it for you before we left so you didn’t have to keep running downstairs for your own when you stay up here.” he gazes down at her, “It is pink and glittery!”
Luna's eyes light up. "Pink and glittery? Yunho knows me too well."
"Come on then princess," Mingi says, suddenly scooping her up bridal style. Luna lets out a surprised squeak.
"I can walk, you know!"
"Nope, you said you were tired. Can't have you falling down the hallway at..." he glances at the clock on his wall, "2 in the morning!"
"My hero," she deadpans, but wraps her arms around his neck anyway.
They pass San in the hallway, who raises an eyebrow at them. "Really?"
"She's tired," Mingi explains seriously.
"I can see that." he teases, “Goodnight sunshine!”
“Goodnight Sannie!” she smiles blowing him a kiss before he disappears into his bedroom.
Mingi nudges the bathroom door open with his foot. He sets Luna down, and she immediately spots the pink toothbrush in the holder with the other ones, giggling with a childlike enthusiasm. "It's so pretty!"
“You are seriously so adorable!” he grins at her as he hands it to her
They brush their teeth, Luna humming some random tune while Mingi makes faces at her in the mirror. When they're done, he picks her up again despite her protests.
"This is completely unnecessary," she says, even as she snuggles into his chest.
"Shh, I'm being romantic."
"You're being a dork." she smiles, “But I love it.”
Mingi gently places Luna on his bed before getting in beside her and pulling his plush covers over them. They share a soft, lingering kiss, Luna noting how minty fresh Mingi's breath is from the toothpaste and mouthwash but also savouring his comforting, familiar scent.
"You taste like mint," Luna mumbles sleepily against his lips.
"Well I would hope I taste like mint considering we just brushed our teeth," Mingi chuckles, “Lets get comfortable.”
Luna turns in his arms so her back was against his chest, she holds onto one of his hands around her waist as they get settled under the covers.
"Sweet dreams, princess," he murmurs into her hair as she lets out a long yawn.
“Good night my opp…” her words trail off as the exhaustion hits her and she falls asleep mid-sentence
Mingi looks down at her, feeling a flutter in his stomach as he watches her sleepy, pouty face resting on his extended arm. It seemed like she was about to call him 'oppa,' a term she never used for him, except for that one playful time on his birthday. In fact, she hadn't used it for any of the others either. The idea of her using such an affectionate term makes him smile.
“You’re so cute.” he whispers resting his head next to hers as sleeps take hold of himself too.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :���゚. ───
Luna wakes to the sound of rain pattering off the window, Mingi's soft snores and his arm draped protectively over her. She watches him for a moment before gently slipping away to avoid waking him. As she moves downstairs through the silent apartment, she notices the suitcases piled in the lounge, left there by a manager after she and Mingi had gone to bed. She retrieves her own suitcase and takes it in her room before going into her bathroom. She steps into her shower, the hot water washing away any drowsiness. Once she’s washed her body, her hair and brushed her teeth with her ‘boring non-pink and glittery toothbrush’ she thought, she dresses in comfortable clothes: black sweats, white cropped top, a dusty pink cardigan, and her favourite pink fluffy socks. Her plan for the day is to do laundry.
Before she had moved in, she hated laundry day. Detested it with a passion. Now - she loved it! Which surprised her but she came to realise it was the trip to the launderette she hated more. Having the luxury of a washer and dryer in her home, being able to do it without having to go outside, and in her sweats was a dream. She also liked that it was something she could do to help out around the house. Despite the guys all telling her they did not expect her to contribute around the apartment at all, she ignored them. Cooking and, at least helping out with laundry was the least she could do in such a large household!
As Luna leaves her bedroom, she can instantly smell the enticing aroma of coffee filling the apartment. She follows the smell and finds Hongjoong in the kitchen, already up and about despite the early hour. He is stirring a mug of coffee, clearly just instant coffee she notices as the coffee machine in the corner is untouched. He is dressed rather smartly, black jeans, white t-shirt and a black leather coat on top.
"Hey my love!" he greets her with a smile.
"Hey!" she replies, snuggling into him as he kisses her face. "Why are you up so early?"
"Going to the studio," he admits.
"Joongie!" she lightly scolds, "We just got back last night, and you're working already!"
He grins, "Guilty as charged, but I did resist for eight whole hours."
She rolls her eyes playfully, "Wow, a medal for you."
"Do you know how many song ideas I had on the flight? My brain is literally going to explode if I don't get them down." he explains
"Your brain's always going to explode with songs," she teases, stealing his coffee. "Yuck! Too sweet." she pulls a face
"It's mine," he says, trying to retrieve it but she spins around so he can’t get it back. "You're worse than Wooyoung with the coffee stealing,"
"That’s an alarming amount of sugar," she says taking another sip before handing it back as she sits on the counter.
"Keeps me going," he replies, sipping before putting it back on the counter
"You'll get diabetes," she pokes his chest as he positions himself between her legs. "Then who'll handle your song ideas?"
"I'll get Mingi to do it," he grins, holding her waist. “Then I can stay at home all day with you.” he adds his lips ghosting hers
“Yeah?” she grins. “And exactly what would we do all day Mr Kim?”
“I’d have you in my bed all day, drawing out those pretty moans you were making in my hotel room,” he replies, his eyes going dark, “Your pussy milking my cock..over and over again.” his voice low before capturing her lips in a searing kiss
Luna gasps at his words against his lips, her arms snaking around his neck as his hands slide inside her cardigan and touch the skin on her her lower back. A low, satisfied groan escapes from Hongjoong, relishing the closeness between them. The kiss intensifies, Luna's fingers tangling eagerly in his silky hair.
“If I wasn’t about to go out the door I would be fucking you right here on this counter.” he moans into her mouth, “filling you up as much you want me to.”
“Such a tease Joongie!” she grumbles
The sound of shuffling footsteps and a deep groan from the hallway causes them break the kiss but Hongjoong keeps a hold of her waist and see a zombie-like Seonghwa stumbling into the kitchen, his hair sticking up in about twelve different directions.
"Oh god, get a room," he mumbles, heading for the coffee maker.
"We have several," Hongjoong replies cheerfully. "This one just has coffee."
Luna snickers as Seonghwa just grunts in response, fumbling with the coffee filter.
"Someone's grumpy," she teases, watching him nearly spill coffee grounds.
"Someone kept me up tapping loudly on his laptop keyboard!" Seonghwa mutters, shooting a pointed look at Hongjoong, “And humming with his headphones on!”
Luna jumps off the counter to help. "Let me do it. You might make coffee with salt."
"Remember when you put sugar on your eggs?" Hongjoong laughs.
"That was once," Seonghwa protests, letting Luna take over. "Thank you," he adds, kissing her head before sitting at the kitchen island.
"Yeah, and Wooyoung still brings it up at least once a week," Hongjoong laughs, taking another sip of his coffee.
"Speaking of Wooyoung," Luna says, measuring out the coffee grounds, "how long until he smells the coffee and materialises in here like a summoned demon?"
As if on cue, there's a loud thud from upstairs followed by heavy and rapid footsteps on the stairs.
"You just had to say it," Seonghwa groans, dropping his head onto the counter. “God, why do I feel hungover when I haven’t drank any alcohol?”
“Jetlag.” both Hongjoong and Luna say at the same time
“Oh Luna, before Wooyoung comes down. Seonghwa, Yunho and I need to speak to you later in private.” Hongjoong says quietly as she switches on the coffee machine
"Why?! Is something wrong?" Luna asks, almost dropping the bag of coffee beans she was putting into the cupboard.
"No, darling. Everything's fine!" Seonghwa looks up, noticing her tone.
"Nothing bad, I assure you, my love!" Hongjoong says, placing a comforting hand on her back, though it does little to ease her anxiety. "I’ll be home soon, okay?"
As Wooyoung's footsteps approach, Luna forces a smile, knowing she doesn’t have time to ask any questions and not wanting Hongjoong to worry as he leaves. Hongjoong kisses her forehead, cups her cheek, and grabs his bag. An even more dishevelled looking Wooyoung stumbles into the kitchen, muttering "Coffee, coffee, coffee," as he reaches for a mug with shaky hands.
Seonghwa raises an eyebrow at him. "You sound like a broken record."
“I need caffeine to function.” he retorts irritably
Hongjoong, noticing Wooyoung's grumpiness, says, "Luna just made a fresh pot, so be nice."
“Oh sorry jagiya, I didn’t even see you there!” Wooyoung says looking in her direction, still half asleep but his grumpy face changes into a soft smile - a tired looking soft smile!
"It's okay," she replies, her heart still racing. "I'll start on the laundry. Seonghwa, could you let the others know to leave their clothes outside their bedroom doors for me to collect throughout the day or even in the lounge… somewhere i can get them throughout the day without bothering anyone."
Before anyone can say or do anything she makes a beeline for her bedroom leaving the 3 men alone in the kitchen, looking at one another.
Wooyoung asks, "Was I really that grumpy?" The worry clear on his face that he’s upset her.
"No, it wasn't you," Hongjoong responds with a light sigh, his gaze lingering on her now-closed bedroom door. "Seonghwa, can I have a word?" he adds softly as Wooyoung starts organising mugs.
Seonghwa follows Hongjoong into the hallway.
"I shouldn't have mentioned the talk before leaving" Hongjoong says as he puts on his shoes.
"Definitely not your brightest idea!" Seonghwa responds bluntly.
Hongjoong sighs, "Keep an eye on her today, okay?"
"I will," Seonghwa nods, "but we both know Luna's going to worry until you're back, no matter what I do or say so don’t be in that studio all fucking night okay!"
"Yeah, I know," he replies, running a hand through his hair knowing he fucked up. "I'll be as quick as possible. Eden wants to start the new song, and I still need to finish up the Japanese track before recording," Hongjoong explains, adjusting his bag strap. "Try to keep her occupied."
“From the sounds of it she’ll be keeping herself busy with laundry but I’ll help her with it, if she’ll allow me.” Seonghwa replies as Hongjoong heads for the door
"I'll return as soon as I can," Hongjoong says, and with that, he leaves while Seonghwa returns to the kitchen.
In Lunas room, she sits on the floor, clothes scattered as she empties her suitcase, Hongjoong's words echoing in her mind. The private conversation request leaves her uneasy, chest heavy and a burning feeling in her stomach and throat. "Focus on the laundry," she mutters to herself, scratching her arm. “Stop it!” she scolds herself, placing her hand on the floor. A light knock at her door interrupts her thoughts.
"Hey Luna," Seonghwa calls softly. "I've brought you some tea. Can I come in?"
“Sure.” she replies
Seonghwa enters and hands her tea in her Tangled mug. She smiles, takes a sip, and says, "Thanks."
“Is it okay?” he asks
"Yeah!" she smiles genuinely, "You're getting better at making tea now."
“It has only took me like 40 failed attempts!” he smiles
“And 40 wasted teabags.” she says, “The British would be throwing you in jail for that you know!” she adds with a grin
"Need any help with laundry? I could sort things into piles for you if you'd like." His voice is gentle and understanding, hoping to ease any fears or anxieties brewing in her mind. “Separate the colours and whites, folding... whatever you want.”
"Oh no, I'm okay!" she insists hurriedly. "I just want to get everything organised and washed today so you guys can rest." Her words sound unconvincing, even to herself.
Seonghwa's expression softens as he places his coffee on her desk and crouches by Luna's pile of clothes.
"You need rest too. You were working really hard in LA with all the translating and meetings," he says, beginning to sort through her clothes.
Luna's annoyance flares, and she sets her mug down on the hardwood floor with a heavy clink. “I said I've got it!" she snaps, yanking the clothes from him, then instantly regrets her tone as she sees Seonghwa's surprised expression. "I'm sorry!" she quickly apologises in English. "I didn't mean to..." She trails off, running her hands through her hair. "Fuck!" she mutters, closing her eyes, feeling the familiar tightness in her chest begin once more. “I.. can’t…”
Seonghwa's brows furrow in concern as Luna's words abruptly cut off, her hands threading anxiously through her tousled dark hair as she curls into herself. He can see her fear and anxiety bubbling beneath the surface.
“Hey,” Seonghwa says softly, settling on the floor, “Come here..” he gestures for her to sit in his lap
She immediately crawls over, wrapping herself fully around him as her head buries into his neck. “I’m sorry Hwa!” she sniffs trying to hold back tears “I’m so sorry…”
"Shh, don't apologise," Seonghwa murmurs, running his hand up and down her back. “It is okay darling…” His chest hurting at seeing her so upset.
Luna lets out a shaky breath against Seonghwa's neck. "Are you guys breaking up with me?" she whispers, speaking in Korean again, her voice barely audible.
"What?" Seonghwa shocked pulls back to look at her, his hands keeping a firm hold of her waist. "God no, Luna. Why would you think that?"
"Because you need to 'talk to me in private' and the way you all were at the airport and on the plane. It was like you were all too afraid of me… scared I would freak out again." she mumbles, focusing on a button on his pyjama top, afraid to meet his eyes. "M-maybe you all realised I'm too much work or how I acted on the flight to LA was-"
"Stop!!" Seonghwa interrupts, gently tilting her chin up. "First of all, if we were breaking up with you - which we're not - Hongjoong wouldn't be casually mentioning it before running off to the studio like he's talking about the weather." His hand moves to cup her cheek. "Secondly," he continues, "you've seen how clingy everyone is with you. Wooyoung literally whined for twenty minutes because you played a game with San in the airport lounge."
"He did not whine for twenty minutes," Luna protests weakly.
"You're right, it was closer to thirty," Seonghwa responds with a hint of sarcasm as she giggles quietly. "The thing is, we all care about you deeply. Breaking up isn't even in the realm of possibility."
"So why does Hon-" she begins
He cuts her off again. "I promise, my darling, it's nothing bad. Hongjoong's timing was just terrible, as always. He has a knack for it!"
Luna snorts as he delicately wipes at her eyes with the sleeve of his top. "You're not wrong."
"I'm never wrong," Seonghwa says smugly, leaning in to kiss her. Luna relaxes, tension easing.
Luna melts into the kiss, feeling the tension in her chest begin to thaw. "You really scared me," she admits softly.
Seonghwa pulls back, pressing his forehead to hers. "I know," he says gently, "and I'm so sorry for that. We didn't mean to be so vague and make you worry."
She breathes in his calming scent. "You promise it's nothing bad?"
"I promise," he reassures, wrapping his arms tighter around her. "Just please try not to stress about it too much, okay?"
"I just... I hate feeling like a burden. Especially to you all." she whispers, her voice trembling slightly.
Seonghwa sighs, brushing stray curls behind her ear. "Luna, you will never be a burden. Not to us, not ever. We want you with us."
He kisses her slowly, deeply, leaving her breathless. Luna clings to him, feeling the care and affection in his kiss. When they part, Seonghwa rests his forehead against hers, placing her hand on his chest to feel his racing heart.
"Do you feel that?" he whispers. "No one else has ever made my heart react like this from just a kiss. Even a simple look in my direction, my heart starts to race. The way we connect? It's as if we were meant for this, meant for each other."
Luna nods, unable to find her voice. Her heart swells with emotion, tears blurring her vision anew.
“I wouldn’t change a thing about our relationship and neither would anyone else. So please believe me when I say that this talk Hongjoong, Yunho and I want to have with you has nothing to do with breaking up with you, or pushing you away. We want to bring you closer.” Seonghwa runs his thumb along her cheekbone tenderly. “Please believe me, darling.”
"I do. I'll try not worry about it anymore," she says, hugging Seonghwa tightly.
"Thank god," he says softly, "because I was running out of arguments." This causes her to laugh. He feels a flutter in his stomach at hearing it, “Laundry can wait. Lets do something fun today instead.”
“Hwa..” she begins
"Unless you find laundry fun!" he adds with a smile.
“While I’m not worrying until Hongjoong returns, I will need something to occupy my mind, and laundry soothes me,” she explains, meeting his gaze as he nods. “But you can help by collecting and washing all the underwear as I am not touching that!! And not my underwear, before you say it!” she laughs.
Seonghwa's face scrunches up in mock offence. "Are you implying our underwear is somehow unclean?"
"I'm saying eight men's underwear after a weeks trip and 2 long haul flights isn't something I want to sort," Luna says, getting off his lap.
“Okay, okay, you have a point! I’ll handle the underwear and anything smelly because we are men!” he laughs. “We usually get laundry done while away, so it won’t be as bad each time.” he adds as she stands up to start her own washing.
“Good to know! I don’t mind doing laundry but massive piles of it after every trip sounds exhausting.” she replies as they make their way to the laundry room down the small corridor beside Lunas bedroom. “I don’t know how my mom managed when my dad returned from tours of duty!”
“Oh that must have been bad!” Seonghwa laughs opening the laundry room door
“It was the stuff of nightmares!” Luna shakes her head at the memories, “I used to dread that bag being opened as it smelled so bad! Dad found it so funny while Mom would yell ‘ya, didn’t you wash anything while away! you are disgusting!’” she mimics her moms voice making him laugh louder. After meeting her parents and seeing their playful dynamic with one another he can picture it in his head.
“Well, our stylists are good at keeping on top of that stuff. They make sure all the staff has their clothes washed too, not just ours. It helps everyone during those long trips especially on tours.” he says, “I guess I better go round up all the underwear, check Wooyoung hasn’t passed out on the kitchen island and then I will make us breakfast.” he adds kissing her cheek
While Luna and Seonghwa spend the day tackling the laundry, the rest of the group drifts downstairs, weary from the flight. They sip coffee, shower Luna with affection, and then go about their activities - Yeosang and San hit the gym, Yunho and Jongho play PC games, and Wooyoung gets more sleep. Mingi is the last to appear, joining Luna on the sofa in the late afternoon as she folds laundry on the sofa.
"Hey princess," he smiles, settling beside her. "How long have you been up?"
"I've been awake since 7, about 8 hours," she replies, kissing his cheek as he yawns loudly. "You were out cold, so I let you sleep."
"I can't believe I slept so long," he admits.
"You needed it," she remarks, folding a T-shirt of his.
"Have you been doing laundry?" he asks, yawning again and rubbing his head.
“Yep, this is the 3rd load. I’ve just put a 4th one on.” she replies
"You did all that by yourself?!" he asks, surprised at how much she’s done while he slept.
“No! Seonghwa helped me. He has gone out to pick up food for dinner with Wooyoung and Jongho.” she says, folding the last item of clothing and placing it into the laundry basket on the coffee table with the others before leaning against Mingi, putting her arms around him.
“How was Jongho this morning?” Mingi asks softly
“The same. Quiet and avoiding me. It is okay though.” she replies
As Luna rests her head on Mingi's shoulder, his familiar scent offers comfort amid her anxieties. Mingi wraps an arm around her waist, processing her words about Jongho.
"I'm sorry he's still giving you the cold shoulder," Mingi says softly, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on her hip.
Luna snuggles closer. "It's not really a cold shoulder," she sighs. "I just wish I knew how to make things better. What if he regrets it?"
“Regrets what, princess?”
“Me. Kissing me, taking me on a date, having me sleep in his hotel room.” her voice is quiet, “Maybe he’s realised he doesn’t like me as much as he thought he would.”
Mingi's heart aches as he listens to Luna's concerns. He knows the consuming power of regret. But Jongho? Regretting Luna? Impossible. Mingi has seen Jongho's unmistakable affectionate glances when he thinks no one is watching.
"No, princess," Mingi murmurs, his voice gentle yet firm. "Jongho could never regret anything involving you. He did not regret that date either."
Luna lifts her head, seeking reassurance. Mingi tenderly wipes a tear from her cheek. "I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but it might help you understand him better," Mingi continues.
“What is it?” Luna asks sitting upright, turning to face him.
"He was deeply hurt by someone he really liked," Mingi explains solemnly. "She was an idol too, but treated him terribly. In public, she ignored him, and in private, she was cold and dismissive, using him without genuine interest. She used him, showing no genuine interest in spending time with him or even speaking to him outside of what suited her needs."
Luna swallows hard, recalling Jonghos words from the night she spent with him - the ‘not-so-friend with benefits’.
"Jongho was always reserved, but she had a hold on him like I've never seen," he says, a flash of anger crossing his face. "He did whatever she asked, without question. Bought her expensive things she not-so-subtly dropped into the rare conversations she had with him.” Lunas fingers instantly touch the luxury brand bracelet he gave her in LA. “She made him feel guilty when he was busy with schedules or practice. She demanded his full attention when she wanted it but never once gave him any."
"What happened?" she asks, her voice tinged with curiosity and concern.
"She blocked him suddenly," he replies, exasperated. "Ignored him backstage, and her bandmates did the same. They ignored all of us actually. San tried to speak to their leader, to try and ease whatever was going on but she gave him a dirty look and walked away without a word.”
"Fucking bitches!" she grumbles in English, a flicker of anger igniting within her, causing her to clench her fists. Mingi lets out a soft chuckle at her fiery response.
“Exactly how we all felt,” he agrees. "We found out later that she had started a relationship… with a fellow idol, someone Jongho was close friends with and who knew how he felt about her… knew that Jongho had fallen in love with her.”
"Oh my god!" Luna whispers, feeling protective. The thought of Jongho's pain and betrayal by two people he trusted makes her blood boil. She can't fathom the depth of his hurt.
“He became even more reserved with showing his emotions...” Mingi continues, “Focused on work, but then, a year later, you appeared in our lives." A small, genuine smile spreads across his face. "And he slowly began to light up, truly smile, and laugh again."
“What if I am not enough for him though?” she asks, her voice tinged with insecurity. “Or I accidentally hurt him too?”
"You're more than enough, princess," Mingi reassures her, holding her hands gently. "And you could never hurt him! You're exactly what he needs now. Just your presence around him is helping him heal, something we could never do for him. You're the perfect person for him with your understanding, care, and patience." He touches her cheek, adding, "We all needed that."
Luna smiles at Mingi, warmth spreading through her chest as his words sink in. She hopes he's right, that she is enough for Jongho.. for all of them, and that she won't unintentionally cause him any more pain than he's already endured.
"I’ll try my best," she promises softly, determination in her eyes. "I don’t want to pressure him into anything he’s not ready for."
“He is ready… he just doesn’t know it yet.” Mingi says pulling her onto his lap, “Just keep being yourself with him.”
"Thank you for telling me though," Luna replies sincerely, “I promise that I won’t tell him you did.”
"I wouldn’t mind if you did tell him but I didn't want you worrying over something that was never your fault." he whispers
"I appreciate it," she says. "It’s helped me understand him better and what I need to do. I won't push him, but I won't hold back either. Normally, I'd give him space, but I think he needs reassurance. I won’t force my presence around him if he truly isn’t wanting it, but I’ll make sure he knows I’m here... when he’s ready."
Mingi smiles. "You’re all stuck with me for the foreseeable anyway!" she adds with a grin.
"Stuck with you?" he teases, eyes twinkling with amusement. "Oh princess, you're stuck with us…" He leans in, pressing his lips to hers between each drawn-out word: "for… a… long… time!"
Luna giggles, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders. Reflecting on her earlier breakup worries, she feels silly now, as they prove every single day how much she means to them.
"You must be hungry—should I cook something?" she asks.
“I think I’ll wait until dinner.” he hums in contentment, “I just want to stay here with you while it’s quiet.”
“You mean while Wooyoung is out.” she giggles resting her head on his shoulder and burying into him
“Am I that obvious?” he teases
“A little!” she replies as her phone notification chimes, piercing the quiet room and making her sit upright in surprise. She leans backwards, reaching awkwardly for her phone on the coffee table just behind her. Mingi reacts quickly, wrapping his arm around her waist to prevent her from tumbling off him, his hold steady.
"Oh, Hwa just texted," she reads, "They’ve got all the food for dinner, some drinks and snacks… oh and even picked up fried chicken from down the street!"
"Fuck yes," Mingi groans, throwing his head back. "I've been dreaming about proper Korean fried chicken since we landed in LA."
"What, the hotel chicken wings weren’t authentic enough?" Luna teases, recalling his complaints when they all had dinner in Hongjoongs hotel room on the first night.
"Those weren't wings—they were sad little nuggets with identity issues," Mingi protests.
Luna bursts out laughing. "The face you made when you bit into one! I thought you were going to throw it across the room."
"I considered it," Mingi admits, his hands sliding to her hips. "American food is so weird sometimes. Why is everything so sweet? Even their bread tastes like cake."
"Not everything in America is bad," Luna defends, though she can't help but agree with him about the bread.
"True," Mingi concedes, pressing a kiss to her neck. "You came from America after all."
Luna groans, gently hitting his shoulder. "That was so cheesy! I can't believe you said that with a straight face."
"What? It's true," he laughs, catching her hands playfully. “Anyway, what’s for dinner?”
“I’m not sure. Wooyoung and I are cooking it together though,” she replies.
“I love both your cooking, so it’ll be amazing!” Mingi grins.
“Hopefully! We’ve never cooked together like this so not sure how it will go” she replies sitting upright and stretching her arms over her head to loosen her stiff muscles as Mingis holds onto her
“Any idea what’s on the menu?” he asks
“Wooyoung is in charge tonight; I’m simply his sous chef,” she answers.
“I’m sure it’ll be delicious,” Mingi smiles.
They remain snuggled until the front door chime interrupts them. Mingi’s head jerks up. "Chicken?" he calls out in a hopeful tone
"Yes, with extra sauce," Seonghwa sighs from the hall.
Mingi looks at Luna with pure joy in his eyes. "I love that man."
"For his chicken-acquiring abilities?" Luna teases.
"Obviously. Why else?" Mingi replies, already lifting her off his lap and dropping her beside him on the sofa. "Sorry princess, but korean fried chicken calls."
Luna laughs as he bounds toward the kitchen. "Your priorities are showing, Mingi!"
"I’m sorry! I have no shame!" he calls back, disappearing around the corner.
She smiles warmly, trailing behind him at a relaxed pace. Her earlier anxiety around Jongho fades to a faint hum. In the kitchen, Mingi is unpacking chicken boxes, while Seonghwa, Wooyoung, and Jongho store ingredients. She hugs Wooyoung from behind.
“Ready to be my sous chef tonight?” he asks her with a massive smile
"Only if you promise not to make me chop onions," Luna replies, resting her chin on Wooyoung's shoulder. “They make me cry!”
"That's because you look like you're trying to murder the onion, not slice it," Wooyoung laughs, reaching back to pat her head. "So aggressive."
"I'm not aggressive, I'm efficient," Luna defends, releasing him to steal a piece of chicken from Mingi's plate.
"Hey!" Mingi protests, mouth already full. "Get your own!"
"Payback for abandoning me for chicken," she says, feeding some to Wooyoung, who nibbles her fingers playfully.
Jongho quietly empties the rest of the shopping bags, his movements careful and measured. Luna catches his eye for a brief moment and gives him a soft smile before he looks away. She is determined to let him know she isn’t going anywhere and she’ll be here when he’s ready to come back to her.
"So, what are we making tonight chef?" Luna asks Wooyoung, keeping Jongho in her view.
"Japchae," Wooyoung says, pulling out ingredients.
“Oh, its been a while since you made that!” Seonghwa says, his eyes going rounder or as Luna liked to think whenever they did that - full boba!
“I'll start the marinade, and you prep the vegetables. And don’t worry, I'll do the onions for you,” Wooyoung says, kissing Luna's cheek.
“Sounds good.” she replies turning her head to him and pressing her lips to his
As Luna goes to move, Wooyoung pulls her back for a passionate kiss. His hands cup her face gently, keeping her close as he deepens the kiss. Luna's surprised squeak quickly turns into a soft hum of contentment as she melts against him.
Jongho watches from his spot near the counter, his fingers tightening around the edge of the plate he's holding. He feels his heart sink a little at how easy the others can show affection for her, how naturally it comes to them. The way Wooyoung kisses her so confidently, without hesitation or second-guessing himself. Jongho quickly averts his eyes, focusing intently on arranging the utensils with unnecessary precision. Wooyoung finally breaks the kiss with a dramatic smack of his lips, looking thoroughly pleased with himself as he sees her flustered face.
"Luna, can you grab the sesame oil from the pantry? The good one, not the cheap stuff Yeosang keeps buying." he asks, turning back to the counter to organise his cooking ingredients.
Luna laughs, heading to the hallway. As she passes Jongho, she deliberately lets her fingers brush against his arm—a light touch, nothing demanding, just a gentle reminder of her presence. "Need anything from the pantry?" she asks him softly.
Jongho looks up, momentarily caught off guard by her proximity and the warmth in her eyes. "I'm... no, I'm good," he manages, his voice low enough that only she can hear.
Luna nods, giving him a small smile before continuing to the pantry. She doesn't push, doesn't linger, just leaves the door open for whenever he's ready to walk through it. Mingis words had resonated with her, she understood him now and she was glad he told her. Otherwise, she might have withdrawn, blaming herself for his distance. Luna knew now exactly what Jongho needed - reassurance but also time and she was determined to give him it.
When she returns with the sesame oil, Wooyoung has already laid out an array of vegetables on the cutting board along with a knife for her.
"Will Hongjoong be home for dinner?" Luna asks, trying to sound casual as she steals another piece of chicken from Mingi, who's too distracted licking sauce off his fingers to notice.
"He texted me as we were picking up the chicken," Seonghwa replies, his voice gentle. "He will be home in about an hour."
Luna nods, hoping her face doesn't betray the nervous flutter in her stomach. "Cool."
Jongho clears his throat quietly. "I'll, uh, go tell the others about dinner." He turns to leave, but Luna's voice stops him.
"Jjong, could you take the laundry basket from the lounge on your way upstairs for me?" she asks him as she washes her hands
He pauses, looking at her properly for the first time that day. "Of course," he says nodding softly.
"Thanks, just leave it in the hall on the first floor and I’ll sort it out later." she gives him a big smile, which he returns – just a slight upturn of his lips, but it's something and it makes her stomach flip.
As Jongho leaves, Wooyoung bumps his hip against Luna's. "Alright, sous chef. Lets do this!"
"Yes, sir!" Luna responds with a salute, reaching for the colander.
"Ooh, I could get used to hearing that!" he says with a grin.
"I'm not saying 'yes sir' to you in any other situation," Luna warns, playfully splashing water at Wooyoung as she rinses the vegetables.
"Oh, I'm pretty sure I can get you to say it elsewhere too!" he retorts with a mischievous look.
"Okay, that's enough," Seonghwa cuts in, pointing at Wooyoung. "We don't need to hear about your 'yes sir' fantasies or anything else."
"I don’t want to be put off this delicious chicken!" Mingi snorts, reaching for another piece only to have his hand swatted away by Seonghwa.
"Save some for the others, you bottomless pit," Seonghwa scolds, putting the lid back on the container. "And Wooyoung, stop saying things no one wants to hear!"
Luna laughs, placing all the washed vegetables and cutting board on the kitchen island so she can sit down as she preps the vegetables. "Woo, should I julienne these carrots or dice them?"
"uh… julienne should be good," he answers as he begins putting the ingredients for the marinade in the bowl, expertly eyeballing it instead of measuring it. “Do you know how to?”
"Did you really just ask Luna if she knows how to..." Mingi pauses, his expression turning puzzled, "something with those carrots?" He had no clue what Luna had just mentioned and wasn't about to try repeating it, knowing he'd botch it and Wooyoung would never let him live it down. "Luna is a far more skilled cook than you! She even makes pasta from scratch!"
"Ya!" Wooyoung exclaims, spinning around, "I'm a good cook too!"
“You are, sweetie.” Luna says in a baby voice as he pouts at her. “But Mingi has a point though, kinda bit of an insult to ask if I can julienne carrots!” she adds
"What does that even mean?" Mingi asks, his curiosity piqued.
"Julienne just means cut into thin strips," Luna explains, picking up a carrot. "Like this." she shows him
"Oh," Mingi says watching her closely, a small smile on his face as she takes the time to show him something.
Luna finishes the carrots and starts on the bell peppers. Meanwhile, Wooyoung mixes the marinade with the beef, covers it, and places it in the fridge. He then joins Luna to help with the remaining vegetables. As they sit together, they share lighthearted jokes and teasing looks until all the veggies are ready for cooking later.
When they are washing up the door chime goes off, indicating Hongjoong has arrived home. Luna feels a drop in her stomach. Instinctively, her eyes dart toward Seonghwa, who is diligently wiping down the counter tops. He pauses, meeting her gaze with a calm, reassuring nod, his expression as steady as the rhythm of his movements, offering her a silent promise of support.
“Wow, Mr. Workaholic is home before sunset!” Mingi teases as an exhausted Hongjoong enters the kitchen. Hongjoong shoots him a piercing look, and Mingi quickly falls silent, seeing instantly his leader is not in the mood for jokes. “I’m going to shower,” he mutters, kissing Luna’s head before leaving.
“Wooyoung, could you go get Yunho for me and give us some space to talk with Luna privately?” Hongjoong asks
“O-of course!” he replies looking between Hongjoong and Seonghwa, “We'll let the meat marinate in the fridge for an hour or two then we will do our chef-ing thing. I’ll come get you when it is time to start.” he adds to Luna, who smiles as Wooyoung brushes her cheek with a soft kiss before heading out.
Leaving the three of them alone, Hongjoong sits at the kitchen island while Luna watches him. His hair is slightly messy, his complexion paler than usual, and he looks exhausted and stressed. “Are you okay? You seem really tired,” she asks.
“I’m fine,” he replies, running a hand through his hair and offering a gentle smile.
"You should get some sleep. We can talk later when you're rested," she suggests, moving closer to place her hand on his forehead. "You're a little warm too!" she observes with a concerned frown. "Do you feel unwell?"
“Not at all, my love,” he assures her, taking her hand and kissing the back of it. “The studio was hot, and Hajoon drove me home with the heat on high!”
Seonghwa silently observes their interaction. Luna gazes at him with concern, and he returns her look with pure affection—something Seonghwa has never witnessed from Hongjoong. He's seen a whole range of emotions from Hongjoong over the years, but never with this expression. Luna's earlier words, "are you guys breaking up with me?" echo in his mind. He wonders how she fails to notice the profound affection in the way they all look at her.
"I’ll make some soup for you. With plenty of food stocked up, I can make ginger noodle or even chicken and rice soup - if you prefer. I don’t want you getting sick!" Luna offers as Yunho rounds the corner.
“Who’s sick?” Yunho inquires
“No one! I’m just warm from Hajoon driving,” Hongjoong explains hastily.
"Oh, that guy's like a walking snowman! He's always cold and insists on having the heater on," Yunho chuckles.
“See!” Hongjoong says, looking at Luna
“Alright,” Luna concedes, “but I’m still making soup for everyone—it’s always good to have some homemade soup in the fridge.”
“Lets have our talk first!” Seonghwa interjects
Hongjoong nods suggesting they go to the privacy of Lunas bedroom to have it, and they make their way to her room.
“Sorry about the mess!” she says quickly grabbing the clothes still on her floor and throwing them into the corner, “I haven’t had time to clean it today.”
“Hey, we’ve just got home. You should see the state of my room!” Yunho laughs trying to ease her worries and urges her to towards her bed
Luna sit down on it as Yunho joins her, encircling her shoulders with his arms. His warm and protective embrace soothes the nervousness stirring within her. Seonghwa positions himself at the foot of the bed, while Hongjoong drags her desk chair over to join them.
"Luna," Hongjoong begins, clearing his throat, "we need to discuss something important about Jongho and the others."
At Jongho's name, Luna tenses, fearing the worst. Yunho gives her a gentle squeeze and whispers softly, "It's okay, little one."
Hongjoong continues, "The night before we returned from LA, we had a meeting. It wasn't just a band meeting like we told you. I'm sorry for not being truthful about that, I made that decision, not the others."
"What was it about?" she asks, feeling tense. Yunho holds her closer to his body, trying to soothe her.
"I wanted to discuss helping with your anxiety for take off without making it a big deal," he explains, she had already guessed this had happened given how perfect they were with her and her needs on their flight home, never missing a beat. “However, your anxiety raised some concerns.”
Luna can feel her heart rate increasing, this has been one of her fears. And despite Seonghwa assuring her earlier that this wasn’t a bad conversation, that they weren’t breaking up with her, or pushing her away, she feels that tightness in her chest begin once again.
“I’m sorry!” she murmurs, her voice quiet and fragile
"Luna, you have nothing to be sorry for," Seonghwa reassures, placing a hand on her knee.
Yunho kisses her head as she begins to shake. "It's okay, little one. We're here," he whispers against her hair
Hongjoong leans forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "Jongho mentioned that he saw you taking medication and hiding it. They think it's for anxiety, and they're worried about you."
Luna's breath hitches. She knew he’d seen her, even if he hadn’t said anything.
"The only reason he mentioned it was because they were assessing your anxiety, and your medication during the flight came up. Jongho wasn't speaking negatively about you," Seonghwa clarifies. “I genuinely believe he wouldn’t have mentioned anything if it weren’t for our conversation!”
"He also mentioned you seemed uncomfortable about who knows about us," Yunho says slowly, "and I accidentally shared your fear of us judging you."
"Oh..." she replies softly.
“My love, I am sorry if we’ve made you feel that way.” Hongjoong quickly adds
“You haven’t.” she replies quietly shaking her head
"Yeosang said your therapist gave you the anxiety medication," Seonghwa says. “So they know you are seeing a therapist and they are very supportive of that.” he adds trying to show her it is positive and nothing to be worried about.
"Was it your bipolar medication in Jongho’s room?" Hongjoong asks carefully.
She nods, fingers twisting in Yunho's hoodie. "Yeah. I only took the anxiety meds for the flights. Before that, it was just after I moved in."
“Why did you need them when you moved in?” Yunho finds himself asking before thinking, “Sorry, you do not need to answer that!”
"Nothing happened," she says, chewing her lip. "I was just overwhelmed with the new job, moving house and us. It was only a few days I took them, I swear to you!" she adds quickly, eyes wide.
"You don't need to explain, my love." Hongjoong says, sitting beside her on the bed. The sight of her small frame curled up against Yunho, with her pale face and wide eyes, tugs at his heart. He longs to hold her, to assure her that there's nothing to worry about, but seeing how secure she seems in Yunho's arms, he opts to gently hold her head to offer some comfort.
Luna can feel the 3 of them, connected to her in some way and it makes her feel a little calmer but her heart is still racing fast in her chest. Yunhos arms around her, Seonghwa hand on her knee and Hongjoongs hand on her head.
“I've been really consistent with my bipolar medication, taking it every single day without missing a dose, even in LA! I’ve been very diligent with it!” she says “I’m seeing my therapist tomorrow, too. I didn't manage to go to the gym everyday because I was exhausted, but I'm definitely taking care of myself! I promise!"
"We know, darling," Seonghwa reassures her, squeezing her knee. "That's not what this is about."
"Then what?" she asks, voice barely above a whisper.
Yunho shifts beside her. "We think it might be time to tell the others now - about your bipolar."
"R-really?” she asks, her fingers clutching Yunhos hoodie tighter
"No one's making you do anything," Hongjoong interjects swiftly. "However, they're already worried, and soon they'll begin to ask questions or jump to conclusions."
"Like what? That I'm unstable?" Luna sighs. "I guess that's true though."
"No," Seonghwa responds firmly. "They’ll think you’re struggling with something on your own that they could actually help with."
"They're worried," Hongjoong say gently. "And they care about you."
"I know," she sighs, looking at them all. "But telling people is always such a fucking minefield. Most of the time, they either treat you as if you're fragile or they start blaming every basic human emotion on your condition." she runs a hand over her face "'Luna's happy today—must be hypo-mania!', 'Luna's sad—oh no, depression spiral!', ‘Luna is angry - must be off her meds!’"
"We'd never think that," Seonghwa insists.
“They won’t either,” Hongjoong promises. “Jongho, Wooyoung, San, Mingi, Yeosang—they’ll be supportive too.”
Luna shakes her head doubtfully. “How can you be sure? This isn’t small. What if they can’t handle it?”
“They will,” Yunho reassures her softly. “You’re part of our family now.”
Luna glances at him, the phrase ‘part of our family’ stirring warmth in her heart, yet also a sinking feeling in her stomach. “Most people think that until they learn everything.” Luna's voice breaks. “I don’t want them to know about...”
"About what?" Seonghwa asks gently.
"About when I attempted to..." Luna exhales shakily. "When I tried to take my own life," she whispers, the words nearly suffocating her.
The words struck the room with the force of a punch. Luna had never been so direct before, always avoiding saying it outright. The harsh truth of those four words - 'take my own life' - seemed to drain all the air in the room.
"I don't want to discuss that with them. I can't bear to see their reactions when they find out what I've done to myself. I don't want their perception of me to change," she says.
"They won't…" Hongjoong starts, but Luna cuts him off.
"Everyone does, Joongie. Even if they try to hide it." Her eyes lock with his, filled with vulnerability. "You did too."
Hongjoong's expression wavers slightly, unable to refute her words. There had been a moment, just a fleeting one, when she first revealed it to him in his studio weeks ago. The instant she pulled back her sleeve and moved her bracelets to reveal her scars, he… paused, unsure.
"It's not your fault though so don’t be hard on yourself. All 3 of you reacted and it is normal." she says looking at him "I still can't bring myself to tell Yunho and Hongjoong exactly what happened, and I only told you the milder version, Hwa." She continues, struggling not to scratch her wrist through her cardigan, though Hongjoong notices her effort. "The reality of it was..." she trails off, closing her eyes and shaking her head as if trying to erase the memory, then buries her head into Yunho's chest. Hongjoong reaches out to take her hand.
"You could just tell them the basics - that you have bipolar disorder and that you're managing it." he says
Luna takes a shaky breath. "What if they ask questions I can't answer yet?"
"Then you don't answer them," Seonghwa says simply. "Set boundaries. We'll help."
"You aren't obliged to reveal everything immediately," Hongjoong says, holding her hand tightly. "They don't need to know about... your attempt, unless you want them to." The words are too difficult for him to speak, fearing he might crumble if he did. The mere idea of her absence from their lives, let alone from this world, sends a chill down his spine.
"When do you think..." she starts, then hesitates.
"Whenever you're ready," Yunho assures her, his arms tightening slightly around her waist. "No rush. Maybe after your therapy appointment tomorrow you can think about it better? You might feel more grounded to really think but there is no pressure to tell them if you truly aren’t ready.”
“If the others are worried though, they deserve to know.” she begins
"Then we'll tell them you have anxiety," Seonghwa suggests. "You're managing with therapy and medication as needed."
Luna relaxes at this compromise, feeling relieved. "That could work, at least for a few days," she agrees, interlacing her fingers with Hongjoongs.
"We just want what's best for you," Hongjoong says, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "You shouldn’t feel like you’re hiding from those who care. You deserve to be free to take your medication and dress comfortably in your own home without fearing your scars will be seen."
Luna nods. "I hate keeping secrets from them. But you're right. They deserve to know something, especially if they're already worried."
Seonghwa's expression softens. "Take your time, think about it after your therapy session tomorrow."
"Whatever you decide, we'll support you. The 3 of us will still be here for you even if you decide not to say anything yet." Hongjoong affirms. "Do what you feel is right."
Luna takes a deep breath, feeling the tension in her body begin to dissipate. The warmth of Yunho’s body, Seonghwa's reassuring presence, and Hongjoong's gentle gaze, she feels grounded. These men know her darkest secrets yet look at her with such tenderness and acceptance.
"Okay," she says, steadier now. "I'll start small, talk about the anxiety first."
"Good plan," Seonghwa nods.
"They care for you," Yunho adds, resting his chin on her head. “That will not change at all.”
Luna laughs shakily. "You're sure of that?"
"We know them," Hongjoong replies simply.
Grateful, she whispers, "Thank you for everything."
"Always," Seonghwa says, squeezing her knee before standing. "This has been a lot to process. You should rest before dinner."
Yunho loosens his arms around her. "Do you want some time alone?"
Luna hesitates, then looks at Hongjoong. Despite his obvious exhaustion, his eyes are filled with warmth for her and she is craving some time with him. "Actually... Joongie, can you stay a bit longer? I-I’ve missed you today.” her voice quiet
Hongjoong's face softens immediately at her request. "Of course, my love."
Yunho sighs dramatically, ruffling her hair. "Always picking the short ones."
"Just because you're freakishly tall doesn't mean the rest of us are short." Hongjoong retorts, already moving to take Yunho's place.
Yunho snorts. "Face it, hyung. You're pocket-sized."
"I will end all of you," Hongjoong threatens without heat, his lips twitching as he fights a smile.
"What are you gonna do?" Seonghwa teases. "Climb up on a chair to reach us?"
Luna bursts into genuine laughter at that, the sound filling the room and lightening the previously heavy atmosphere. Hongjoong can't even pretend to be mad anymore, watching her laugh with such fondness that Yunho and Seonghwa exchange knowing glances.
"Alright, enough height jokes at my expense," Hongjoong says, waving them toward the door. "Go on, get out so I can cuddle my girlfriend in peace."
"Don't you mean so she can cuddle you?" Yunho asks innocently as he backs toward the door. "Since you're the perfect little spoon size—"
"OUT!" Hongjoong yells, grabbing a small pillow from Luna's bed and hurling it at Yunho, who dodges it easily
Seonghwa rolls his eyes as he heads toward the door. "Just don't fall asleep in here for hours. Wooyoung will have a meltdown if his sous chef doesn't show up for dinner duty."
"I won't sleep too long, just a little nap." Luna promises.
"Bold of you to assume sleeping is what's going to happen," Yunho mutters under his breath, earning an elbow in the ribs from Seonghwa.
"We can hear you, giraffe," Hongjoong calls out, already settling next to Luna on the bed.
Yunho just grins, completely unrepentant. "Be safe!"
"Get out!" Luna groans cuddling into Hongjoongs arms as Yunho runs out the room laughing loudly
Seonghwa lingers in the doorway for a moment. "You okay?" he asks Luna softly.
She nods, giving him a genuine smile. "I am now. Thank you."
Seonghwa returns her smile before shutting the door behind him with a soft click. Hongjoong feels the tension in his body leave, both of them shuffling under her covers. "God, I've missed you," he murmurs
"You saw me this morning," Luna points out, but she's already melting into his embrace.
"Doesn't matter. I always miss you when I'm not with you." He runs his fingers through her hair. "Even when I'm working, there's this... Luna-shaped hole in my chest."
Luna giggles, pulling back to look at him. "Is that the kind of lyric you're working on at the studio? Because if so, maybe you should let Mingi take over."
"You're so mean to me," Hongjoong pouts, but his eyes are dancing with amusement. "I pour my heart out and you mock me."
"I'm not mocking you," Luna says softly, “I miss you too”, she presses a kiss to the tip of his nose. When she pulls back, she notices the dark circles under his eyes, the slight strain around his mouth that appears when he's overworked. “You look tired.”
Hongjoong groans, burying his face in her neck. "I'm exhausted. Eden was being particularly picky today with the new song, and then the Japanese lyrics weren't flowing right, and all I could think about was how I'd fucked up this morning by mentioning the talk right before leaving."
"You didn’t fuck up," Luna says, running her fingers through his hair. "I mean, it wasn't your finest moment, but Seonghwa talked me down before I spiralled too far."
"I'm sorry," Hongjoong says, lifting his head to meet her eyes. She can see the stress in them but also the emotion. "I should have…"
Luna cuts him off with a kiss, soft and sweet. "It's fine, sweetie. We're okay now."
As they kiss, Luna can feel the heaviness in Hongjoong's movements, the way his lips press against hers with a tenderness that's tinged with exhaustion. When they part, she traces the dark circles under his eyes with her thumb.
"You need to sleep," she says softly.
"I'm okay," Hongjoong protests, unsuccessfully hiding a yawn that contradicts his words.
"You look like you're about to collapse onto my face." She softly eases him down onto the bed.
“I want to spend time with you!” he pouts as his head hits the pillow
“I am staying right here with you until Wooyoung comes to get me to cook dinner. I’ll have at least another hour with you.” she replies "So go to sleep. Captains orders."
"I'm the captain," he protests weakly, even as he allows her to tuck the blanket around him.
"Not when you're this tired, you're not. Temporary coup. I'm in charge now."
A sleepy smile tugs at Hongjoong's lips. "Mutiny on my own ship," he murmurs. "Betrayed by the prettiest pirate." he lets out a long yawn, his eyes closing. “You’d make a sexy pirate.”
"And on that bizarre note, now sleep." Luna leans down to kiss his forehead before cuddling into his chest. "Dream of sexy pirates or whatever."
"Hmm, just you, my sweet love." he mumbles, already half-asleep.
Luna smiles as she snuggles into him. For the first time in 48 hours she feels completely relaxed and tomorrow she can make a plan of when and how to finally tell the others of her condition.
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silver-hwaberry · 4 months ago
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⭐️UTOPIA UPDATE & PREVIEW⭐️
I am so sorry! This chapter has took me so long to write as I kept scrapping it and restarting it again! After like 5 restarts I am happy with it now. All I have left to do is the ending and then final edit which I aim to do tomorrow (it is currently 3.05am so technically it is already tomorrow but I still need to sleep first!) and hopefully have it published either Sunday night or Monday!
As a thank you for waiting so long for this one here is a little preview of it!
They gather around the kitchen island, various containers spread out across the surface. The smell of delicious food fills the apartment as everyone digs in, the exhaustion from the flight momentarily forgotten in favour of satisfying their hunger.
"Stop stealing my wings," Wooyoung whines, swatting at Yeosang's chopsticks.
"You've had like six already," Yeosang retorts, successfully nabbing another piece.
"I counted and it was four, you thief!"
Luna is squeezed between Seonghwa and Mingi, taking small bites of her pizza slice while attempting to avoid glancing at Jongho, who has seated himself at the opposite end of the island. He hasn't looked in her direction, silently consuming his meal. It felt as though he intentionally sat as far from her as possible, which made her heart ache.
"Here," Seonghwa says quietly, sliding some of his chicken onto her plate. He always knew she liked extra.
“You should have it!” she replies trying to give it back but he holds up his hand
“I am nearly full and put too much on my plate!” he says “Take it before Yeosang and Wooyoung start fighting over it.” he whispers with a playful tone
“Thanks Hwa.” she smiles at him and leans over to kiss him
“Yeosang!!” Wooyoung shouts leaning across and pulling the container of chicken wings away from him
“Stop!” Yeosang lunges across the counter, nearly knocking over Mingi’s drink in the process.
"Careful!" Seonghwa scolds, steadying the glass. "I just cleaned this counter."
"Again with the cleaning," Wooyoung rolls his eyes. "We literally just got home."
"Some of us prefer not to live in filth," Seonghwa retorts, eyeing the sauce dripping down Wooyoung's chin.
Luna watches the chaos unfold with a small giggle, feeling warmth spread through her chest despite Jongho's continued silence at the end of the counter. She leans into Mingi's side, taking another bite of her pizza as Wooyoung and Yeosang continue their wrestling match over the chicken wings.
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silver-hwaberry · 4 months ago
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⭑I Can See You⭑
TWO: cosmic rush
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Warnings: angst, arguing, fighting (one physical push between 2 members), name calling, swearing Word count: 8.5k
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⭑2016⭑
“Hello stranger!” Yunho greets her as Yeonghwa walks into the classroom
“Hey Yunho!” she laughs taking off her backpack
Yeonghwa hadn’t been at school for the past 3 days as she was in Japan working with Moonlight. They had a performance there plus were filming the MV for their new song ‘Cosmic Rush’.
“How was Japan?” he asks as she sits down
“Busy!” she simply answers. “How was school?”
“Boring! Mr Nams satellite ears weren’t as funny without you here!” he replies. He looks at her as she sets up her school stuff on the desk, “There is something different about you!” he says, not sure what it is
“Probably my hair!” she says not batting an eyelid
“Did you get a hair cut?” he asks looking at it more closely
“Not quite.” she laughs looking at him, “I am wearing a wig, Yunho!”
"A wig?" Yunho's eyes widen comically as he leans closer to inspect her hair. "No way! It looks so real!"
"Well yeah, that's kinda the point," Yeonghwa snorts, swatting his hand away as he reaches out to touch it. "And don't pull on it, I spent forever getting it to sit right this morning."
"But why are you wearing a wig?"
“New hair for the comeback, I have to hide. So wigs are a must when I am at school.” she sighs, “Personally I hate them as they are itchy and make my head sweat but it is strictly forbidden to reveal new hair styles and colours beforehand.”
“Am I allowed to know?” he grins playfully
“Absolutely not!” she laughs swatting his hand away again
“Oh come on, where are my best friend perks?!” he pouts
Yeonghwa freezes slightly at him saying ‘best friend’ and he notices her reaction. Since Yunho started at SOPA 3 weeks before they had gotten more friendly with one another, spending their time exchanging notes, talking during breaks and Yeonghwa was enjoying having a friend at school now but she hadn’t realised he saw her that way. She decides not to say anything about it but Yunho can see she is a little weirded out as she brushes it off.
"Well..." she drags out the word, pretending to think hard about it. "I guess since you did help me with that chemistry homework last week..."
"Yes? Yes?" Yunho leans forward in his chair, practically bouncing.
"It's white with these really pretty pastel pink and lilac streaks," she finally whispers into his ear covering her mouth so only he could hear. The sensation of her breath on his ear and the low tone of her voice makes his stomach flip a little. "But if you tell anyone, I swear-" she leans back
"My lips are sealed!" he mimes zipping his mouth shut. "But that sounds sick actually. Can't wait to see the big reveal."
“You will see it on comeback day if you watch the music video or our comeback stage.” she says, “I won’t be in school for a few days again.” she adds with a small sigh
“Of course I’ll be watching both and all performances afterwards! Just you try and stop me!!” he smiles, “When are the teasers dropping?” he asks
“First one is in 2 days so you’ll see my hair in its full glory then!” she answers, “And I can take this fucking wig off!”
“And don’t worry about schoolwork. I made you a copy of all our work this week and I will do the same next week too.” he says handing her a semi-thick folder
“Wow!” she gasps looking at it, “You really didn’t need to do all this! Thanks you Yunho!” she is grateful for his help in keeping up with her studies.
Previously, when she missed classes because of her schedule, no students gave her notes; she only received a small packet of assignments from the school to complete during her absence.
“It was nothing!” he shrugs nonchalantly
As Yeonghwa flips through the folder with a grateful smile, she notices a small piece of paper tucked inside. Curious, she pulls it out and unfolds it to reveal a simple doodle of a hamster which was her animal representative in the band with a phone number underneath it and faded heart at the end. It looks like he had drawn it and then erased it but the paper was still showing it faintly. It made her smile a little.
Yunho rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, "I know it's cheesy, but I wanted to give you my number so if you had any questions about school work you had a way of contacting me," he says with a shy grin.
Yeonghwa glances up from the drawing, her cheeks turning a bit pink at Yunho's gesture. "Are you sure this isn't just a trick to get my number?" she teases.
"What? No, definitely not! You don't have to give it to me if you don't want to!" he replies, flustered.
"Yun! I'm just kidding!" she laughs, "That's really thoughtful of you," she adds, placing the paper securely into her folder with a gentle smile.
“Oh!” he sighs in relief as he scratches his head awkwardly, a bashful grin on his face. "I just want to make sure you're all set for your comeback without falling behind in schoolwork," he says earnestly.
Yeonghwa nods appreciatively. "I really appreciate it, Yunho. It means a lot to me," she says softly. “But you may end up regretting it as I could end up blowing up your phone when I am on schedules!”
"Feel free to send me as many messages as you want!" he laughs. "Oh, and keep it a secret that I have a phone. We're not supposed to have them until after debut, but we all secretly do. Hongjoong would be so annoyed if he found out, but I'm pretty sure he has one too!"
"A secret phone? How scandalous!" Yeonghwa teases, lowering her voice dramatically. "And here I thought you were such a good boy."
"Hey, sometimes you just have to do what you have to do," Yunho says, puffing up his chest before breaking into a smile.
They sit in a comfortable silence for a moment before Yunho clears his throat. "So, um, are you up for a ninja picnic lunch today? My treat, I’ll buy you whatever you want!" he offers with a hopeful expression. “I’m not going to see Mingi today as he has a dental appointment.”
"I can't today," she explains. "My manager reserved one of the private halls for me to rehearse. We're filming the dance practice video for the song tonight, so I need to get ready."
"Oh, that's cool!" he responds with a nod, but she notices the disappointment in his expression.
"But I'll be alone, so i-if you'd like, you could join me," she stammers nervously, her fingers playing with the bottom of her skirt. "As long as you promise to keep the song a secret!"
"Really?" he responds, brightening.
“Of course!!” she breaks into a wide smile “Maybe I can finally see some of these awesome dance skills you say you have too!”
“My dancing is totally awesome!” he grins
"Oh yeah? Prove it then!" Yeonghwa challenges, raising an eyebrow. "Show me what you've got during practice!"
"Challenge accepted!" Yunho announces with a theatrical puff of his chest. "Just don't hold it against me if my awesome moves leave you feeling jealous."
"Pfft, please," she rolls her eyes, trying not to laugh. "I've been dancing since I was like, 4 years old."
"Well, I've been dancing since I was in the womb," he replies with a cheeky grin.
"That's not even possible, you goof," she laughs, giving him a playful shove. "If that were true, I really pity your mom for dealing with that while you were in her belly—and considering you're a giant too!"
"I'll have you know, I was just as small as you when I was born! I only shot up in height over the past two years!" he says with a grin.
“I find that hard believe!” she laughs, “Scary part is you are still growing too! I stopped when I was 13 years old!”
Yunho looks at her fondly. He had missed her presence in school the past 3 days. Although he did get more work done in class as he wasn’t messing around with Yeonghwa, it wasn’t as fun and he missed her.
As the rest of their fellow classmates begin to fill the classroom and the teacher walks in, they got themselves prepared for the day ahead. They spent break time together as usual, going over the folder of notes Yunho had made for her, telling her what assignments had been set etc and before they knew it lunch time had arrived.
“You get yourself something to eat and come to room 107 when you are ready.” Yeonghwa says as they make their way down the stairs
“Do you want me to get you anything?” he asks, hoping she’ll be eating something but she shakes her head.
“I’ve got a protein shake and a banana with me today.” she answers, “Misty handed it to me as I was leaving this morning. Said she’d hit me over the head with the banana if I don’t have them!” she giggles
“Good! I’m glad someone is taking care of you!” he smiles at hearing she is actually going to be consuming something for lunch. “Want a bottle of water?”
“Yeah I do actually!” she says pulling her purse from her pocket to give him money
“Oh hell no, put that away! This is my treat!” he smiles, “and after your promotions are over I will take you out for a lovely meal to celebrate!”
“I highly doubt my company would allow me to do that, they control every aspect of my life,” she responds. Yunho feels a pang in his chest at her words, not because she said she couldn't do it, but because her company has so much control over her. It doesn't seem fair. "But I wouldn't say no to having a ninja lunch with you after everything is done," she adds with a mischievous smile.
“Really?” he breaks into a smile
“Absolutely! If it is okay with Mingi, that is!” she replies
“I am positive he would. He is pretty cool. I think you two would really get along!” Yunho replies
“Its a deal then! Once my promotions are over, we do the great escape!” Yeonghwa nods with a happy grin on her face.
As they reach the bottom of the stairs, Yeonghwa make her way to the private dance hall, her footsteps echoing in the empty corridor. The familiar scent of polished wood and sweat greets her as she pushes open the heavy door. Sunlight streams through the high windows, casting long shadows across the gleaming floor causing her to smile. She loved being in practice rooms, it was her place of sanctuary, somewhere she can be free. She sets down her bag and pulls out her protein shake and banana, placing them carefully on a nearby bench.
Meanwhile, Yunho navigates the bustling cafeteria, the cacophony of voices and clattering trays filling the air. He quickly selects a sandwich and an apple, his mind already racing ahead to the dance hall. As he paid for his food, he grabs two bottles of ice cold water, one for himself and one for Yeonghwa.
Back in the dance hall, Yeonghwa has changed into her practice clothes - a loose tank top and form-fitting leggings with a pair of sneakers. The choreo she was about to perform would be impossible in her stiff and restrictive school uniform. She stands before the wall of mirrors, taking deep breaths as she centres herself. With practised movements, she begins to stretch, her lithe body bending and twisting to get rid of the stiffness from sitting at her desk for so long.
Yunho arrives just as Yeonghwa was finishing her warm-up routine. He slips inside quietly, not wanting to disturb her concentration. Knowing himself how important it is to get into the zone before dancing. He finds a spot against the far wall and he settles down to watch, his lunch momentarily forgotten.
He notices that her black wig has been tossed aside and her freshly dyed white hair, which is now shorter and falls a few inches below her shoulders, hangs in loose natural waves with pastel streaks that are barely noticeable from afar.
Yeonghwa pulls out her phone and set it on a small speaker. She sets up her ipad infront of the mirror, ready to play the group rehearsal video if she needed any reminders. A moment later, the opening notes of Moonlight's new song filled the room. The beat was infectious, a pulsing rhythm that seemed to vibrate through the floorboards. Yunho can’t help but nod to his head to beat as his eyes focus on her.
Yeonghwa begin to move. Her body becomes a living instrument, every gesture precise and purposeful. She flows across the floor, her feet barely seeming to touch the ground. Her arms carved graceful arcs through the air, fingers splayed in delicate formations.
As the song reaches its climax, Yeonghwa launches into a breathtaking series of spins, her body a blur of motion. She ends with a dramatic pose, chest heaving, one hand on her hip. For a moment, the room was silent save for her ragged breathing.
Then, catching sight of Yunho in the mirror's reflection, Yeonghwa's serious expression melted into a wide grin. She turned to face him, wiping sweat from her brow with the back of her hand.
"So," she pants, eyes sparkling with mischief, "what did you think?"
Yunho sits there, mouth agape, still processing the incredible performance he'd just witnessed. He struggles to find words that could adequately express his admiration.
"That was... wow," he finally manages, shaking his head in disbelief. "I knew you were good, but that was... incredible. Seriously, Yeonghwa, you're amazing."
“I know it looks strange dancing solo to a group performance but trust me it looks a lot better when we do it together, I promise!” she laughs as he hands the bottle of water to her
“Not at all! I practice alone too so I get it. I can’t wait to see the comeback stage!” he smiles
"Time to show me those moves you were bragging about earlier," Yeonghwa says, taking a long drink from her water bottle. "Unless you were all talk?"
"Oh, I'll show you my moves alright," Yunho grins, shrugging off his blazer, rolling up the sleeves of his white shirt and untucking it from his trousers to give him more freedom. "Just don't get jealous when I outshine you."
"I'm shaking in my sneakers," she deadpans, but can't help smiling as she watches him do some exaggerated stretches while she sits infront of the mirror to look at him head on.
"Okay, play that track again. I've got this," he says confidently, moving to the centre of the room.
Yeonghwa hits play and watches with growing amusement as Yunho starts to dance. Her amused smile is soon replaced with wonderment as he hits the majority of the moves - his movements are sharp and he has picked up the steps from that one performance she did. But when it comes to one particularly complex sequence that Yeonghwa does in the dance break which includes a backwards handstand and a landing into the splits, he gets his legs tangled and nearly face-plants.
"Shit!" he yelps, stumbling sideways. "How the hell do you make that look so easy?"
"Years of practice and one very scary choreographer," she laughs, walking over to help him. "Here, it's more like this-" She demonstrates the move slowly.
"My legs don't bend that way!" he protests, trying to copy her. "I think you might actually be made of rubber."
"Says the guy who's basically a human giraffe," she teases, adjusting his arm position. "Less flailing, more control."
"I am graceful as fuck, I'll have you know," he declares, promptly tripping over his own feet again.
“It is a hard move so don’t over do it, I don’t want you to hurt yourself. I fear your leader may hunt me down if I get one of his fellow trainees injured!” she says
“I can do it!” he nods
They spend the next few minutes going through the steps very slowly, Yunho's determination to get it right making Yeonghwa smile. Despite his jokes, she can tell he's actually trying hard to learn the complex move properly.
“Okay, you are getting it!” she claps when he nails the backwards handstand and nearly does a full splits
"That's not a move guys are supposed to attempt!" he chuckles as he stands, trying to resist the urge to massage his sore groin in her presence.
"You did great," she says with a smile. "But can you do it in sync with the music?" she adds with a playful grin.
“Is that a challenge?” he quips as she nods, “From the top!” he adds as she begins the track from the beginning
They both stand side by side facing the mirror as the music begins over the speaker, the bass vibrating through the floor they begin to dance in complete sync with one another. Yunho nailing every single move. Yeonghwas eyes are on him in the mirror as she dances beside him and she is seriously impressed.
As the dance break begins, Yunho smashes the quick movements, the backwards handstand and even the splits before getting up quickly to finish the routine off. As the music ends they are both breathing heavily standing in the ending pose.
“Holy shit!” Yunho groans flopping to the floor exhausted as Yeonghwa holds onto her hips and squats down beside him laughing.
“Yunho, that was awesome!” she says as she looks at him sprawled on the floor
“They didn’t give me the main dancer position for nothing you know!” he replies opening some of the buttons of his shirt to get some air, maybe a bit too many as the top part of his chest is on show.
Yeonghwa awkwardly looks away as she sees the skin of his chest before standing up and going over to her bag to get the banana. As Yunho sits upright he sees in the mirror how much of his chest he just exposed accidentally, quickly covering himself again.
"So uh, that was fun!" Yeonghwa says a bit too quickly, focusing intently on peeling her banana.
"Yeah!" Yunho agrees, still slightly out of breath as he fumbles with his shirt buttons.
An awkward silence falls between them as Yeonghwa takes small bites of her banana, very deliberately staring at the wall. Yunho clears his throat. "I think I’ve pulled muscles I didn't even know I had."
"You'll definitely feel it tomorrow," she snorts, still not quite looking at him. "Maybe I should've warned you about that part."
"Nah, totally worth it," he groans, rolling his shoulders. "Even if I have to crawl to dance practice tonight."
“Oh shit, you should have said you had dance practice! I would have gone easier on you!!” she says with wide eyes
"Please, I could do this choreo in my sleep," Yunho scoffs, though the way he's wincing as he stretches tells a different story.
"Oh yeah? Is that why you're moving like my grandpa right now?" Yeonghwa takes another bite of her banana, finally able to fully look at him now that he's buttoned up.
"Your grandpa probably has better flexibility than me right now," he groans, attempting to stand. "Shit, I think my legs are actually broken."
"Drama queen," she rolls her eyes, but offers him a hand up anyway.
Yunho eagerly accepts, forgetting her small stature as he pulls a bit too forcefully, almost causing her to topple over. He quickly steadies her by placing his hands on her hips as she clutches his shoulders for support. Even though he was seated on the floor, his height and her petite 153cm frame meant their faces were closer now than when standing. It was the first time she truly observed his facial features, and her stomach fluttered at how handsome he was, especially with the gentle way he gazed at her while her fingers softly held onto his shirt.
The moment stretches between them, neither moving. Yeonghwa can feel the warmth of his hands through her practice clothes, and she's suddenly very aware of how sweaty she probably is from dancing.
A loud bang from somewhere in the hallway makes them both jump. Yeonghwa stumbles backward, nearly tripping over her own feet this time.
"Shit, sorry!" Yunho says, hands hovering awkwardly in the air where her waist had been. His ears are turning pink. "I didn't mean to, uh..."
"No, it's fine! I mean, You did save me from face-planting so… thanks!" Yeonghwa says quickly
They both move at the same time to gather their things, nearly bumping into each other again. Yunho takes an exaggerated step back, almost tripping over his own feet.
"So uh, when exactly is the comeback?" he asks, trying to break the weird tension. "You know, so I can mark my calendar and everything."
"Thursday," she answers, grateful for the change in subject.
“You must be really exhausted with the preparations and school on top.” he says
“I think my body's running purely on energy drinks and bananas at this point." she laughs
“I wonder what Misty would say if she knew!” he smirks
"What Misty doesn't know won't hurt her," Yeonghwa says with a guilty grin. "Though she has this weird sixth sense about these things. Last time she caught me with a Red Bull she literally appeared out of nowhere like some kind of health-conscious ninja with shoving one of her disgusting kale smoothies into my hand."
"That's terrifying," Yunho laughs as he stretches his legs. "Fuck, I think my legs are actually dead."
"Aww poor baby," Yeonghwa teases. "And here I thought you said you were graceful as fuck?"
"I am! I'm just... gracefully sore."
“Well get used to it with being your groups main dancer! You’ll be pushed past your limits a lot… but it gets easier.” she says as they sit on the wooden bench beside the wall, “Hows things with your group anyway?”
“The same. Late night practices for all of us after school. Monthly reviews.”
“Ah I don’t miss those!” she nods taking a sip of her water, “They scared me every time!”
"I heard you were the top trainee every month, though!" Yunho remarks.
“Oh I was because I worked my ass off but also feared for my life too.” Yeonghwa confesses, as Yunho listens intently. "The company constantly threatened to terminate our contracts and give us bus tickets home if we didn't meet certain targets. I didn't want to go back to Yeosu! Don't get me wrong, I love my little hometown on the south coast, but I wanted this opportunity too much.”
Yunho nods, absorbing everything she's sharing, catching a rare glimpse of the real young woman behind the image of 'Korea's princess' that most people see.
“So hows your companies trainee search going? Last I heard there was someone you’s were trying to steal from another company!” she says
"We're meeting him next week, so fingers crossed he chooses us! We do have a new person who started this week, and you'll never guess his name!" Yunho responds excitedly.
“What is it?!” she giggles
"His name, Yeonghwa, is..." he pauses for a dramatic effect, emphasising her name, "Seonghwa!"
"Yeonghwa and Seonghwa!" she exclaims, eyes wide. "You have no excuse for forgetting my name now, mister!"
"As if I ever could!" he replies. "He seems nice though, older than the rest of us, and he's also from the south coast. I think he and San will have a lot to talk about."
"Where is San from?" Yeonghwa asks as she tosses her banana peel into a small trash bag.
“Namhae.” he answers
"That's right next to Yeosu! My family and I went to Namhae for vacation a few times. It’s really beautiful! My aunt actually moved there because she loved it so much." she says, her eyes lighting up. “And Seonghwa?"
“Just below Jinju, I don’t know exactly where but I heard him say he lived by the ocean so must be at the coast.” he answers, “Good news is the company will be giving us a dorm soon! Living together will help us bond more I think.”
“That is so cool! Dorm life can interesting but mostly fun! Do you know how many members your company is looking to have in your group yet?” she asks pulling her legs up to sit crossed legged
“At the moment they’ve said 7.” he replies, “Though the CEO just can’t make up his mind. Last week he wanted 5 members, the week before we said 11! Next week he’ll probably want 25!”
"God, can you imagine?" Yeonghwa snorts. "Just an entire army of idols on stage. The poor stylists would have a mental breakdown."
"The choreographer would quit on the spot," Yunho grins. "Though at least the fanchants would be epic. Might take fans three hours just to get through all the names."
"Your lightstick would need its own battery pack," she giggles, then grimaces as she shifts position. "Ugh, I think my legs are starting to cramp up too."
"I swear that backwards handstand into splits thing is actually torture disguised as choreography." Yunho groans
They both laugh, and Yeonghwa checks the time on her phone. "Shit, we should probably head back soon. Mr. Nam will have an aneurysm if we're late."
"His satellite ears might actually explode," Yunho agrees, attempting to stand up and immediately regretting it. "Fuck, I think I'm stuck. You might have to wheel me to class in a desk chair."
"Some main dancer you are," Yeonghwa teases, getting up with a similar feeling to Yunho. "Need me to carry you?"
"On your back?" he asks hopefully.
"In your dreams, giraffe boy." she says
“It was worth a shot!” he shrugs, “I’ll take our rubbish to the bins and wait for you outside as you get changed.” he adds
Yunho heads to the bins outside, clutching a bag of trash. After tossing it in, he leans against the wall, savoring a quiet moment alone. A smile spreads across his face as he reflects on spending his lunch break with Yeonghwa, watching her dance and learning from her. He had admired her dancing for a long time.
Yeonghwa emerges from the dance room, her wig slightly askew and her uniform slightly rumpled from changing quickly. She fidgets with her blazer as she spots Yunho waiting, her mind unhelpfully flashing back to the accidental chest reveal and the feeling his hands on her waist, the way he looked at her.
"Ready?" Yunho asks, pushing off from the wall.
"Yeah," she mumbles, looking down at her feet as they start walking.
They walk in awkward silence for a few steps before Yunho trips going up the stairs.
"Need me to call you an ambulance?" she teases, walking backwards up the steps to face him. "Or maybe a crane to lift you?"
"You're evil," he declares, dragging himself up dramatically. "Pure evil disguised as a tiny person."
She's about to retort when she notices her wig slipping slightly. She quickly adjusts it, glancing around to make sure no one saw.
"Your disguise is slipping, Spiderman," Yunho whispers conspiratorially.
“I hate this thing!” she grumbles “The quicker this comeback happens so I can stop hiding my hair the better.”
“Well if it makes you feel any better, I think your new hair looks really good.” he smiles as they reach the top of the stairs. “And the new song is amazing too. You ladies are going to smash the comeback.”
“Thanks Yun!” she says feeling a bit flustered at his compliments
Yunho notices her flushed cheeks and shy smile, and in all honestly it makes him feel good seeing her react to him like that. However he knows the reality of their situation. They are friends only.
⭑2020⭑
Yunho sees that same flushed cheeks and shy smile on her face now all these years later. It still gives him butterflies. As much as he wished it wouldn’t. Seeing her again after so long during the award season had been difficult for him. A mixture of emotions he hadn’t realised he’d been keeping inside were coming out now.
Their last conversation had replayed in his head over and over again despite not thinking of it in over a year. The hurt in his heart resurfacing once more. The words she said. It had come out of nowhere as well and he couldn’t wrap his head around why. He had just came home from a month long training trip to LA with the other members, they had spoken every single day on the phone in secret when camera, managers and Hongjoong wasn’t around. Nothing had changed until they met up, Hongjoong allowing her to visit the dorm for a bit since Yunho hadn’t seen her in so long, and as far as he knew barely spoken to her while away. Yunho had been so excited to see her, he cleaned up the entire dorm himself, set up his shared room with San with blankets and pillows to watch a movie (the door was to be left wide open at all times Hongjoong demanded), bought her favourite flowers and had presents from LA for her. He had been so excited to see her again, hold her close in his arms once more.
But the moment she stepped into the dorm, he sensed that something was amiss. After some time, Yunho broke Hongjoong's rule about keeping the bedroom door open, closing it when Yeonghwa repeatedly pulled away from his attempts to hug her or hold her hand—something she hadn't done since they'd become more than friends. That's when she uttered the words he never imagined he'd hear: ‘I don’t love you.’
She walked out and disappeared from his life, until award season arrived two years later. By then, Ateez had debuted and, though still considered 'rookies,' they were gaining popularity, meaning Yunho and Yeonghwa were bound to cross paths again.
His band members had silently rallied around him during each award show that Moonlight was in attendance at, trying to be subtle about keeping an eye on him but he could see through them. He truly appreciated their care but he didn’t want a fuss.
He takes one more glance at her and feels his heart skip a beat as she smiles at the fans in the audience waving to her. Her new hair colour - cherry red catching the lights perfectly. As a member of staff approaches the band, her focus turns to them and they all stand up. Clearly it’s time for them to get ready for their performance and it would be a lie if he said he wasn’t looking forward to it.
As the five women hurriedly passed by the group, Yunho attempted to focus ahead, but his gaze lingered on Yeonghwa as her subtle perfume enveloped him. He caught Mingi's eyes on him, and Yunho understood exactly what Mingi was thinking. Yunho had been open about his feelings for Yeonghwa since she ended things with him two years ago. Mingi detested her and was never shy about expressing it.
"For fuck's sake, stop staring," Mingi mutters under his breath, barely moving his lips as he maintains his camera-ready smile.
"I wasn't," Yunho whispers back, though they both know it's a lie.
"Stop making moon eyes at the person who-" Mingi cuts himself off as a staff member approaches with fresh bottles of water for them all, his expression shifting seamlessly into his usual cheerful demeanour. "Thanks noona!" he says brightly, before immediately dropping his voice again. "Who literally broke your fucking heart."
"I know, okay?" Yunho mutters, grabbing a bottle. "Trust me I was there, I know."
“And so were all of us!” Mingi grumbles, “Don’t let her suck you back in! She’s like siren - pretty and luring but evil inside!”
"I'm not getting dragged back into this," Yunho says, rolling his eyes, though Mingi's words tug at his heart. "And she's not evil! You never truly understood her."
"I know enough!" Mingi retorts, turning sharply to face Yunho.
"We're on camera, so both of you need to stop!" Hongjoong warns with a tense smile. "You can talk about this later when we're in private!"
Yunho takes a deep breath, trying to shake off the tension that had built up between him and Mingi. He knew his friend meant well, but sometimes his protective nature could be a bit overwhelming.
As Moonlights opening VT plays on the screen in preparation of their performance, Mingi leans in close to Yunho, lowering his voice. "I just don't want to see you hurt again, man. You deserve so much better than what she put you through."
Yunho nods, grateful for Mingi's concern. "I appreciate it, really. But I've come to terms with everything. It's water under the bridge now."
Mingi gives him a sceptical look, but doesn't press further as they all focus on the stage.
The lights dim, and a hush falls over the audience as Moonlight appear on a raised platform in the middle of the stage. They had changed into colourful sequin outfits that suited each of their styles. An ominous song plays as the camera does close ups of each of the members faces on the screen with the crowd cheering loudly and as Yeonghwa appears the noise appears the double in volume.
The opening notes of their latest song fill the arena, and the group burst into flawless synchronisation, their dance moves sharp and crisp. Yeonghwa was a blur of silver sequins and flowing red hair, her body twisting and leaping with astonishing grace.
As the song shifts into ‘Cosmic Rush’, Yunho's heart skips a beat. Moonlight launch into the energetic choreography for it - the same one Yeonghwa taught him years ago, back when they were just two innocent kids in school. Happy memories flood back to him - Yeonghwa giggling as he stumbled through the routine for the first time, her patient encouragement as he slowly got it right. The way she clapped, cheered and encouraged him when he nailed the complex moves.
As the song reaches its climax, Yeonghwa delivers the fast paced dance break moves with ease, her body seeming to hang suspended in mid-air for a breathless moment before crashing back to earth in a perfect landing. The crowd erupts into cheers, but Yunho barely registers them. His eyes are still locked on Yeonghwa, his heart pounding in time with the driving beat of the music.
“Aria is amazing!” Yunho hears Wooyoung say to San
San nods in agreement. “She always delivers every time! That’s why she is one of the best dancers in the business!”
“Shame about her personality!” Mingi says causing Yunho to glare at him
Hongjoong swiftly rises and guides Yunho to move to his seat, asking San to switch seats with Mingi positioning himself and San between Yunho and Mingi. Sensing that the situation was escalating, Hongjoong realised he needed to take action now.
On stage, Yeonghwa dances with dizzying speed and precision. Yunho can't help but grin - she was always destined for greatness on that stage. Watching her continuing to soar fills him with joy, even as a twinge of wistfulness tugs at his heartstrings. If only things could have been different between them...
As the final notes fade away and Moonlight take their bows to thunderous applause, Yunho feels a strange sense of peace wash over him. No matter what had happened between them in the past, he knew that Yeonghwa would always be an important part of his life.
As Moonlight make their way back to their seats, all their fellow idols standing to bow at them including Ateez, Yunho becomes intensely fascinated with his water bottle label, picking at it with his thumbnail while trying desperately not to look in their direction.
The award show drags on for what feels like eternities, with Yunho's leg bouncing so much that Hongjoong eventually places a hand on his knee to stop it. As the final award is announced and the closing ceremony begins, Yunho feels an overwhelming urge to find Yeonghwa backstage. He needs to talk to her, even if he has no idea what he'll actually say.
"Don't even think about it," Mingi hisses as they file off stage, clearly reading Yunho's mind. "I swear to god, I will literally sit on you."
"You're not my mom," Yunho responds, scanning the crowded backstage area.
"No, but I am your voice of reason, and right now your reason is telling you to get your ass to our waiting room before you make a big mistake."
"Mingi, I swear-" Yunho starts, but freezes as he spots a familiar figure in a silver sequin dress with long red hair disappearing around a corner. Without thinking, he yanks his arm free and darts away, ignoring Mingi's colourful cursing behind him.
Yunho weaves through the crowded backstage area, dodging staff members and other idols with his long legs while trying not to knock anyone over. He spots Yeonghwa again, this time talking to one of her members near the vending machines.
He hesitates for a moment, suddenly realising he has absolutely no plan. What the fuck is he even going to say? 'Hey, remember that time you completely shattered my heart? Good times!'
Before he can chicken out, Yeonghwa turns and spots him. Her eyes widen slightly, and for a moment they just stare at each other like a pair of deer caught in headlights.
"Uh, hi," he manages eloquently, internally cringing at himself.
"Hi," she responds, equally awkward. Her member Areum glances between them before making some excuse about needing to get her make up touched up. Yeonghwa nods grateful at her for giving her and Yunho space to speak.
"So..." Yunho starts, then trails off. Fuck, he really should have planned this better.
"So..." Yeonghwa echoes, fiddling with the sequins on her dress. "Your performance was amazing. As always!"
"Thanks. Yours too. That, uh, that backwards handstand gave me war flashbacks!"
She lets out a surprised laugh. "You remember that?"
"Kind of hard to forget when my groin still twinges every time it rains," he says without thinking, then immediately wants to die of embarrassment.
Yeonghwa snorts, covering her mouth quickly. "Still as graceful as fuck, I see?"
"You know me," he grins, relaxing slightly.
Yeonghwa can feel her heart racing in her chest at Yunho standing infront of her, actually talking to her! She never thought this would ever happen after she hurt him so much.
"Anyway, you are one to talk! Your moves are pretty insane!" Yeonghwa says, tucking some of her cherry red hair behind her ear. "The one where you practically fold yourself in half backwards. That looked painful as shit."
"Oh god, don't even remind me," Yunho groans. "My spine basically files for divorce every time we perform it. Pretty sure our choreographer is secretly a contortionist who enjoys watching us suffer."
"At least you're tall enough that when you do it, it looks cool. When I try anything like that I look like a garden gnome having a tantrum!"
Yunho snorts at her garden gnome comment. "Hey, at least you can do aegyo without looking like a sleep paralysis demon. I try to be cute and fans think I'm having a stroke."
"Oh god, remember that time you tried aegyo in the hallway during break and scared that poor freshman?" Yeonghwa laughs loudly, the memory hitting her suddenly. "Pretty sure she transferred schools after that."
"Listen, I was trying my best back then!" Yunho protests, though he's grinning. "And she only screamed a little bit."
"A little bit? The entire hallway thought someone was being murdered! Mr Nam came flying out the teachers lounge with a bat ready to attack someone!"
"Yeah well, not all of us can be naturally tiny and adorable," he says, gesturing vaguely at her whole... everything. "Some of us are cursed with being basically a tree."
"Please, you love being tall," she rolls her eyes. "How many times did you make me get stuff from the top shelf in the library or at the store just so you could watch me struggle?"
"It was quality entertainment!" he defends. "Like watching a very determined hamster trying to climb Mount Everest."
Yeonghwa gasps in mock offence. "I will climb you like a tree and fight you right now!"
"What, and risk messing up your fancy dress?" Yunho grins, nodding at her sparkly outfit. "Also I'm pretty sure if you tried to climb me in those heels, we'd both die."
"Worth it though," she smirks.
They both laugh, and for a moment it feels just like old times. Her laughter causing a flutter of butterflies to erupt in his stomach at hearing it once more. He has missed her a lot more than he realised. Then they hear Mingi's voice calling for Yunho from somewhere nearby, and reality crashes back in. "Ah shit."
"Still getting into trouble?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Some things never change," he shrugs. "I should probably-"
"Go," Yeonghwa finishes for him, a small smile playing at her lips.
"Yeah," he says, but doesn't move. "It was... it was good to see you, Yeonghwa."
"You too, Yun," she says softly, and something in his chest tightens at the old nickname. He swallows hard, suddenly feeling like there's a whole fucking field of landmines between them.
"Are you... would you be interested in meeting up at some point? Maybe we could grab a coffee or something." The words come out in a rush before he can second guess himself. "Just as friends though! No pressure!"
Yeonghwa blinks at him in surprise, processing his sudden invitation. A part of her screams yes immediately, desperate to spend more time with him, but another part hesitates.
"That sounds nice," she says slowly, carefully weighing her words. "But I don't know if that's such a good idea."
"Oh," Yunho nods quickly, trying not to let his disappointment show on his face. "Right, no worries! Totally understand."
"It's not that I don't want to-" Yeonghwa starts hurriedly, but stops herself. What is she doing? She can't do this to him again.
"It's fine," Yunho says again, forcing a small smile he doesn't feel. "We're both busy people with hectic schedules anyway. It was a dumb idea."
"No it wasn't-" Yeonghwa reaches for him instinctively grabbing his hand.
The sudden physical contact between causes both their hearts to leap. Without thinking Yunhos free hand cups her cheek as she nuzzles into it, finding comfort in his touch.
The moment stretches between them, charged with unspoken words and memories. Yunho's thumb brushes gently across her cheek as he leans down, drawn to her like a magnet. Their faces inches apart, he stops himself just before their lips meet, instead resting his forehead against hers. They stay like that for a heartbeat, sharing the same air.
"One coffee," Yeonghwa whispers, barely audible.
Yunho lets out a shaky breath of relief. "One coffee," he repeats softly.
"But if Mingi tries to murder me, I'm using you as a human shield," she adds with a weak attempt at humour.
"He'd have to catch you first," Yunho murmurs, still not moving away. "And you're basically pocket-sized, so you could probably just hide behind a plant pot."
"I will literally bite your kneecaps," she threatens without heat.
"See? Tiny but vicious. Like an angry chihuahua."
"Keep talking like that and that coffee's gonna end up in your lap," she warns, but her fingers tighten slightly in his hand as Yunho lets out a breathy laugh
"YUNHO!" Mingi's voice echoes closer, making them both jump apart like startled cats.
"Quick, go before he has an aneurysm," Yeonghwa says, taking a step back. "I'll text you about the coffee."
"You don't have my number anymore," he points out.
“I can easily get it,” She grins at him, tightening her fingers once more “I have my connections!”
Just then, Mingi rounds the corner looking annoyed, his long legs eating up the distance between them quickly. His eyes narrow when he spots Yeonghwa before he sees them holding hands. Yeonghwa immediately drops it and takes a step back, nervously fiddling with the ends of her long hair.
"There you are!" he exclaims, grabbing Yunho's arm. "We need to go. Now."
"Mingi-" Yunho starts, but Mingi's already dragging him away.
"Nice seeing you again, Aria!" Mingi calls over his shoulder, his voice dripping with fake sweetness with extra emphasis on her stage name, which Mingi also knew she hated being called. "Love what you've done with your hair. Really brings out the snake-"
"For fuck's sake," Yunho mutters, yanking his arm free. He shoots an apologetic look at Yeonghwa, who's watching the scene unfold with wide eyes. “I was just being polite!” he looks back at Mingi
"Just being polite? Are you fucking kidding me? You are standing there holding her hand like teenagers!!" Mingi's voice rises an octave. "What happened to 'I'm not getting dragged back into this' and ‘water under the bridge’?"
"We were literally just talking about dancing!" Yunho protests, running a hand through his hair in frustration.
"Oh sure, because that's how it starts! First it's 'oh hey, nice backwards handstand' and next thing you know you're sneaking out to hotels with her then crying into your pillow when she throws you to the side again."
Yunho catches Yeonghwa shifting uncomfortably in his peripheral vision, her eyes fixed on the floor. The awkwardness is practically radiating off her in waves.
"Can we not do this here?" Yunho hisses, although the corridor is practically empty now, anyone could hear Mingis loud voice.
"Oh, I'm sorry, is this inconvenient for you?" Mingi's voice drips with sarcasm. "You know what else was inconvenient? Having to watch you mope around like a kicked puppy for months!"
"For fuck's sake, that was two years ago-"
"Yeah, and I'm not watching you go through round two of the Great Depression because you can't keep your distance from that bitch!" he points towards a startled looking Yeonghwa as Yunho pushes him. Mingis entire body language changes as he straightens up, somehow looking taller than Yunho.
"Song Mingi!" Hongjoong's sharp voice cuts through their bickering like a knife. Their leader stands at the end of the hallway, arms crossed, looking thoroughly unimpressed. "Both of you, waiting room. Now."
"But hyung-" Mingi starts.
"Did I fucking stutter?" Hongjoong says making his way towards the three of them
Mingi throws his hands up in frustration. "Fine. Fucking fine." He shoots one last venomous look at Yeonghwa before storming off, muttering under his breath.
"I'm so sorry, Yeong!" Yunho says moving back to Yeonghwa, who's hugging herself and looking like she wants the ground to swallow her whole. "He had no right to-"
"Yunho," Hongjoong cuts in firmly. "Say goodbye."
Yunho's jaw clenches, clearly wanting to say more, but one look at Hongjoong's expression tells him it's not up for debate. He turns back to Yeonghwa, his eyes softening. "I'll see you soon."
She manages a small nod, still looking shaken. Yunho hesitates for a moment before following the path Mingi took, his shoulders tense with barely contained anger.
Once Yunho's out of earshot, Hongjoong turns to Yeonghwa. His expression isn't unkind, but there's steel in his voice, there was no denying his intentions with his words. "You need to stay away from him. You once told him to leave you alone - do the same!"
"I didn't- he came to talk to me," Yeonghwa protests
"Yeah, because he's Yunho and he can't help himself," Hongjoong sighs, running a hand through his hair. "Look, you know how he is. He sees the best in everyone, even when they've hurt him."
"I never meant to-"
"Doesn't matter what you meant to do," Hongjoong cuts her off. "What matters is what happened and what you did to him! And it nearly broke him." He takes a step closer, lowering his voice. "I know that you genuinely once cared for him… so I'm asking you, for his sake and mental wellbeing - keep your distance."
Yeonghwa swallows hard, nodding slightly. She opens her mouth to respond but is cut off by her manager calling her name from down the hall.
"Good," Hongjoong says simply, already turning away. "See you around, Aria sunbaenim." he adds with a respectful bow but his tone of his voice was anything but.
Hearing her stage name feels like a sharp blow. The message is unmistakable. She observes Hongjoong walking away, then turns to face her manager, who is watching from a distance. Taking a deep breath, she heads back to her dressing room.
"Are you alright?" she inquires, wrapping a comforting arm around Yeonghwa's waist as she joins her.
Yeonghwa can only nod as they walk back to Moonlights waiting room.
As Hongjoong returns to his own waiting room, the air is heavy and silent. Mingi and Yunho are sitting on opposite sides of the room, the space between them crackling with unspoken words. Mingi’s arms are crossed, his jaw clenched so hard it looked like it might shatter at any moment. Yunho, on the other hand, is slouched in a chair, his eyes fixed on the floor.
The rest of the group is scattered around the room, their usual chatter replaced by an uncomfortable silence. Seonghwa is leaning against the counter between Yunho and Mingi as if waiting to play referee, his brow furrowed in concern
“Hey,” Seonghwa says softly, pushing off from the counter and walking over to Hongjoong. “What happened? Mingi stormed in not saying a word and Yunho came in a few minutes afterwards and.. I’ve never seen him look this way before!”
Hongjoong sighs, running a hand through his hair as he shut the door behind him. “They were… ” he says quietly, tipping his head toward the two. “I don’t even know how to describe it. They looked like they were about to go at each other’s throats.”
Seonghwa’s eyes widen. “What? What happened?”
Hongjoong shook his head. “I don’t know the whole story, but I walked in on the tail end of it. Yunho was talking to Yeonghwa, and… I don’t know what they were discussing, but Mingi clearly didn’t like it. When I found them, they were standing in the hallway, it was like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off.”
“Damn,” Seonghwa mutters, crossing his arms over his chest. “And then what?”
Hongjoong hesitates, replaying the scene in his mind. “Yunho… he pushed Mingi. Actually pushed him. I’ve never seen him like that before. He’s always the calm one, the peacemaker. But… he just snapped.”
“Yunho p-pushed him?!” Seonghwa asks shocked
“Mingi called Yeonghwa a bitch.”
Seonghwa’s expression turns grim. “Yeah well, that is like a red flag to a bull. We all know by now not to badmouth her infront of Yunho.”
“Yeah, well this was not only infront of Yunho but Yeonghwa too! And in a corridor!” Hongjoong sighs, “We are just lucky the corridor had cleared out by this point and no one saw or heard any of this!”
“Ah shit!” Seonghwa rubs his head, “This is bad. Really bad. We need to nip this in the bud, now!”
“I know,” Hongjoong sighs, his voice laced with worry.
"You know how Yunho becomes when it involves Yeonghwa. His judgment gets clouded, and Mingi... Mingi's just trying to look out for him, but he's handling it the wrong way!"
Mingi suddenly stands up causing everyone except Yunho who is still staring at the floor, to look at him. “Yunho… you are my oldest friend,” he says taking a step forward, “And I’m sorry that I upset you but… I can’t stand by and watch her hurt you again.”
Yunho lifts his gaze from the floor, his face reflecting both surprise and defiance. "Mingi, I get it," he starts, his voice unsteady, "and I know why you all have issues with her," he glances around at everyone else, "but you've only ever seen one side of my relationship with Yeonghwa, and unfortunately, it was the worst moment. None of you witnessed us when we were alone, those times when her guard down, and she wasn't Aria from Moonlight, but just Yeonghwa from Yeosu! You never saw her!"
"No one's saying those moments weren't real," Seonghwa cuts in gently. "But-"
"But what?" Yunho says. "She's evil? A snake? A heartless bitch? I’ve heard it all and worse, from each of you! You may not have said it to my face, but I could always hear you badmouthing her when you thought I couldn’t."
"Dude, she literally told you she never loved you while wearing your fucking hoodie," Yeosang points out. "Like, who does that?"
Yunho’s jaw tightens as he processes Yeosangs words. His fists clench at his sides, his eyes flickering with a mixture of hurt and anger. “I know what she said,” he grits out through clenched teeth. “But you don’t understand everything. You weren’t there for the whole story.”
Mingi steps closer, his expression softening. “Yunho, we just don’t want to see you get hurt again.”
Seonghwa nods in agreement, his gaze sympathetic. “It’s not about doubting your feelings, Yunho. It’s about looking out for you because we care about you.”
“And we are sorry you heard us speaking badly about her.” Wooyoung says
Yunho appreciates the support from his friends, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. He nods gratefully, the sincerity in his eyes reflecting his gratitude. "Thank you, guys. I know you all mean well, and I'm grateful to have you looking out for me." He takes a deep breath, “But if you really do care about me, I need you all to back off when it comes to her.”
“What do you mean ‘back off’?” Jongho asks
Yunho looks around at his friends, his expression firm yet pleading. "I mean back off from talking about her, from trying to intervene with Yeonghwa. I need to figure things out on my own without all the negativity and interference. She’s agreed to meet me for a coffee… just the one!" he adds quickly as San groans.
Hongjoong frowns, concern etched on his face. "But Yunho, we just want what's best for you. We don't want to see you get hurt again."
"I know," he starts, his voice filled with gratitude. "But I need to handle this in my own way. I don’t know what is going to happen, we might never speak again after the coffee or we could slowly become friends once more…"
Mingi lets out a silent sigh at this that Yunho thankfully does not hear.
“But I can’t bear to have any of you disparage her anymore, regardless of what happens.” Yunho finishes. “You all say you don’t want me to be hurt, but hearing you speak that way about the girl I lov… once loved - THAT hurts me too!”
Seonghwa places a comforting hand on Yunho's shoulder. "We hear you, Yunho. We'll respect your wishes and try our best to support you in the way you need," he reassures him, his gaze filled with understanding.
Mingi, who had been listening quietly, finally speaks up. "Yunho, we've got your back. Just remember that we care about you and want the best for you," he says with a reassuring smile, his eyes reflecting his sincerity.
“That is all I am asking for.” Yunho replies
Wooyoung chimes in, his tone serious. "Yeah, we'll respect your boundaries. Just know that we're here for you no matter what."
Jongho nods in agreement. "We just want you to be happy, Yunho. We'll trust that you know what's best for yourself."
San can’t help but hug Yunho. "Just remember, we're here for you through whatever comes next."
“Don’t shut us out either!” Yeosang says
Mingi smiles at Yunho. "And I promise to keep my opinions about her to myself from now on. I didn’t realise I was hurting you whenever I spoke of her. Your happiness is what matters most to me.. to us."
With a collective nod, the group stands in solidarity with Yunho as he prepares to face the uncertainties of his meeting with Yeonghwa, knowing that they will be there for him every step of the way.
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<m.list> ⋆ <next>
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silver-hwaberry · 4 months ago
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Updates:
Chapter 2 of I Can See You is nearly done. I was unsure of this one as there is a lot of angst in it and wasn’t sure if it was too early for that but reasoned it is needed now to set the tone! I should be uploading it at some point today.
Chapter 24 of Utopia is taking a little longer. There will be a lot of smut incoming after this one and also angst so be warned. This one should be uploaded by Friday! That’s my personal deadline for it anyway!
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silver-hwaberry · 5 months ago
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I have Ateez in Manchester tonight then home tomorrow! I’ve gotten so many ideas for Utopia when the guys go on tour in the story 😏
So hopefully chapter 2 of I Can See You and chapter 24 of Utopia will be uploaded within a week.
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silver-hwaberry · 5 months ago
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I’ve spent the last 2 nights with Ateez. 🥰 and off to Manchester tomorrow to see them on Thursday. It has been a manic few days but I’ll be home on Friday night and plan to finish off chapter 2 of I Can See You and chapter 24 of Utopia over the weekend.
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silver-hwaberry · 5 months ago
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I was hoping to get chapter 2 of I Can See You and Chapter 24 of Utopia published before Sunday but I don’t think I will manage it.
I fly to London on Sunday morning and will be gone all week for the Ateez tour in London and Manchester. Once I am home I will finish both chapters and get them published as soon as I can. 🩶
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silver-hwaberry · 6 months ago
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I Can See You ♡ masterlist
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Summary: Since she was young, everyone knew her as Aria, the youngest and most versatile member of the K-pop group Moonlight, and their ‘queen maknae’. She was adored by fans all over Korea, but no one saw her as Kim Yeonghwa, a girl from a small coastal town. That is until she meets 17-year-old Jeong Yunho at SOPA, and they form an instant friendship that soon turns into love. Despite their strong bond, Yeonghwa makes the difficult decision to break his heart and let him go in order to give his career a chance. But as time passes, their paths continue to cross and fate keeps bringing them together, they struggle to resist the undeniable connection between them.
Pairing: idol!Yunho x IdolFem!OC
Genre: romance, angst, fluff, smut, young love, forbidden love, childhood sweethearts
Chapters: ONE ☾ TWO ☾ THREE ☾ …more to come
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silver-hwaberry · 6 months ago
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ONE: i can see you...
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Warnings: bullying, implied eating disorder and mentions of controlled eating but no details
Word count: 4.6k
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⭑2016⭑
Yeonghwa let out a heavy sigh as she plopped into her usual seat at the back of the classroom. The School of Performing Arts Seoul was both a blessing and a curse for Yeonghwa, being the youngest member of the popular 5 member K-pop girl group Moonlight. Not only was she the maknae of the group, she was also the main dancer and lead rapper but also a vocalist too, and had been dubbed ‘Koreas princess’ by the media too.
As she gazes around the room, she could feel the weight of the judgemental stares and hushed whispers following her every move. Despite her fame, high school was still a daily struggle for Yeonghwa. Even though she had debuted two years earlier and found success, she was still only 17 years old and had to attend high school in Korea. Her hectic schedule often kept her from attending class on a regular basis and made it difficult for her to keep up with her studies compared to her peers. She was also the only member of her group who was still in school.
The pressure of being a popular idol while also trying to maintain her education was overwhelming. However, it was a requirement set by her parents when they allowed her to move from Yeosu-si to Seoul at the age of 13 to become a trainee. "Don't forget about your education," they told her, and she was determined to make them proud by excelling in both areas.
As she pulls out her textbooks, she feels the weight of dozens of eyes on her.
"Did you see her performance last night?"
“What was she even wearing? It was hideous!”
“Her ass is way too big to be wearing that skirt last night! It would have looked much better on Jinni instead.”
“No way, Haneul would have rocked that outfit! Don’t know why they give it to her!”
“Probably because she would have had a tantrum at someone else being centre of attention. Little Miss Attention Seeking once again!”
"They need to kick her out of the band, Areum is a much better dancer and she can actually rap too.”
The murmurs swirl around her, a constant reminder that she didn't belong here. Her phone buzzes, and she discreetly checks it under her desk. It was a message from Haneul, their leader:
"Meeting with the manager after school. New variety show opportunity for you."
Yeonghwa's stomach clenches. Another commitment to juggle. Another reason she'll fall behind in class. But she knew better than to complain. This was the life she'd chosen, the dream she'd fought so hard for. She'd make it work somehow. She always did.
Yeonghwa puts her phone away and keeps her head down, trying to focus on the lesson ahead. Just as the teacher was about to begin, the classroom door slides open suddenly causing everyone to look over.
"Sorry I'm late!" A tall boy with a kind smile rushes in, bowing apologetically to the teacher.
"You must be the new student transferring into my class," the teacher responds.
"That's me!" The boy grins, clearly excited to be joining the class.
The teacher awkwardly turns to address the class, struggling to remember the boy's name. "This young man will now be joining our class. Let's all make sure to give him a warm welcome."
"He's so good-looking!" Yeonghwa hears from the girl sitting in front of her.
“You can sit over there, beside Aria!” the teacher points at the empty seat beside her
Yeonghwa feels her chest tighten as some quiet laughs are heard around the room. She hated people calling her by her stage name. As he makes his way to his seat, his eyes meet Yeonghwas. Instead of the usual judgement or disdain she was used to, she saw warmth.
The boy slides into the empty desk beside her. "Hi," he whispers, offering a friendly grin. "You're Yeonghwa, right?"
Yeonghwa nods cautiously, waiting for the other shoe to drop. But his smile only widens. "Cool! It is nice to meet you! I’m Yunho!"
She blinks, caught off guard by Yunho's friendly demeanour. She opens her mouth to respond, but the teacher's sharp voice cuts through the air.
"Yunho, Aria, is there something you'd like to share with the class?"
"No, sir," Yunho replies smoothly. "Just introducing myself to Yeonghwa."
The teacher narrows his eyes. "Well, do it on your own time. Now, if everyone can get their textbooks out we will begin with..."
“Oh I don’t have a book for this class yet.” Yunho whisper quietly.
Yeonghwa slowly slides her textbook towards the centre of their shared desks, allowing Yunho to read from it as he thanks her. As the lesson continues, Yeonghwa can't help but glance over at Yunho every now and then. She is both curious about him and apprehensive, wondering if he will make a snide comment or try to take a covert photo of her like everyone else does.
In the middle of class, a wadded up paper lands on her desk. She carefully unfolds it, fully anticipating yet another mean joke directed at her. It had become commonplace for notes to be tossed onto her desk, teasing and mocking her. However, when she opened this one, she was surprised to find a drawing of their teacher with exaggeratedly large ears and the caption: "Do you think he could pick up satellite signals with those? Or is it just me?"
Yeonghwa tries to suppress a giggle as the teacher gives her a stern glance. Yunho shoots her a sly wink, and she feels a flutter in her heart. As the class progresses, Yeonghwa finds herself surprisingly interested and engaged. Having Yunho by her side seems to protect her from the usual judgemental whispers and glares of her classmates.
While the teacher has his back turned, Yunho leans in closer to Yeonghwa. "Do you think his ears are more like a satellite dish or an elephant's?" he whispers.
Yeonghwa stifles a laughter and responds, "Definitely a satellite. I bet he can pick up signals from other planets."
Yunho feigns seriousness as his eyes widen. "That would explain a lot." before laughing lightly.
Just then, the teacher spun around, eyeing them suspiciously. Yeonghwa quickly pretends to be engrossed in her textbook, while Yunho adopts an expression of angelic innocence that was so over-the-top it nearly made her snort.
As soon as the coast was clear, Yunho scribbles another note and slides it her way. This time, it was a rough sketch of the teacher with antennae sprouting from his ears, captioned: "Houston, we have a problem."
Yeonghwa couldn't help it - a giggle escapes before she could clamp her hand over her mouth. The teacher's head snaps up, his gaze zeroing in on her like a heat-seeking missile.
"Aria, is there something amusing about the Pythagorean theorem?"
Yunho jumps in before she could stammer out a response. "Actually, sir, I was just asking Yeonghwa if she could explain it to me later. Math isn't my strong suit."
The teacher's eyebrows shot up. "Well, that's... commendable. But please save your study plans for after class."
As he turns back to the board, Yeonghwa shot Yunho a grateful look. He winks back, then mouths, "Nice save, right?"
She rolls her eyes, but couldn't quite hide her smile. For the first time in ages, she actually felt like a normal high school student. It was... nice.
As the lunch bell rang, the two girls sitting in front of him immediately turned to face him. Their curious gazes were met with a polite smile from Yunho.
"So Yunho, how are you finding SOPA?" one of them asked, leaning in with a smile.
"It's only my first day, but I'm enjoying it so far," he responded confidently. Beside him, Yeonghwa hurriedly gathered her belongings, her head bent low.
“Some students are more skilled than others,” the other girl remarks. Yunho picks up on her tone and notices the glance she directs towards Yeonghwa. “We can show you who they are.”
Yunho's eyes shift towards Yeonghwa, noticing her tense posture and how she has pulled her long hair to cover her face as she looks down. She seems to have retreated within herself, just as she was when he first joined her this morning. Gone is the playful and open demeanour she had displayed with him moments ago. He couldn't help but notice the looks their classmates had been giving her during their lessons as well and it dawned on him that this was a regular occurrence for her.
Yunho responds firmly, "Thank you for the offer, but I think I can manage on my own. Actually, I've already made up my mind about 2 of them." His eyes narrow slightly as he looks at them
The two girls exchange glances, visibly surprised by Yunho's response.
"Oh really?" the first girl asks with a sugary smile, though her eyes betray her true feelings. "And what have you decided?"
"That they're exactly the type of people I avoid," Yunho says cheerfully as he gathers his books. "You know the kind - they think they're better than everyone else because they talk behind people's backs. Jealousy really is an ugly thing."
Yeonghwa's head snaps up, her eyes wide. A few students nearby, who were clearly listening in, suddenly find something else to focus on.
"Excuse me?" the second girl splutters, her cheeks turning red. "You can't just say that! We don't even know you!"
"And thank god for that," Yunho retorts, getting to his feet. He turns to Yeonghwa. "Come on, let's get out of here."
The two girls storm off in a huff as Yeonghwa stares at Yunho, trying to process what just happened as all the students begin filtering out the classroom, Yunho and Yeonghwa gather their things and are the last to leave.
“Are you alright?” Yunho asks, his tone filled with concern as he worries that he may have crossed a line.
“You didn’t have to do that,” she says, grateful but also feeling guilty.
“I did it because I can’t stand people who act like they’re better than others when they really aren’t,” he replies with sincerity. “And because I really did not like the way they were speaking to you and looking at you.” he adds feeling a slight blush creep on his cheeks
“Thank you for standing up for me,” Yeonghwa says shyly. “And for not calling me Aria either.”
"Well, Aria is just your stage name, right? Here at school, I figured it was better to use your real name, Yeonghwa."
Yeonghwa nods gratefully, glad that he understands the difference. “Yes, I prefer Yeonghwa, especially in this setting. But most people keep calling me Aria and it drives me crazy!” Which Yeonghwa knew was exactly their intentions when they call her it.
Yunho nods in understanding and leans in, speaking quietly. "Can I ask a question? Does the teacher always look like he's sucking on a lemon, or is that just for my benefit?"
Yeonghwa lets out a loud laugh and tries to hide her amusement behind her hand. "No, that's just his normal expression. I don't think he knows how to smile."
Yunho grins and adds, "I'll remember to include that in my 'SOPA Survival Guide.' Right after 'Avoid the cafeteria food at all costs.'"
"That's not even the worst part," Yeonghwa groans. "Trust me, bring your own lunch if you don't want to glow in the dark."
“Well, that works out perfectly because I have no intention of having lunch here anyway,” he chuckles.
“Why’s that?” Yeonghwa asks with curiosity
"My friend attends a nearby school and I prefer to join him for lunch." he explains as they descend the stairs. "He's a slow eater and feels self-conscious about it, so I like to keep him company."
"Oh," Yeonghwa smiles, "That's really kind of you."
“And what about yourself? What do you usually do for lunch?” he asks.
Yeonghwa shifts her gaze towards the floor. "Um.. I actually don't eat lunch at the moment."
Yunho stops in his tracks and turns to face Yeonghwa. "Why?" he asks, furrowing his brow.
“Comeback is in 3 weeks so.. you know, need to make sure everything fits and looks good.” she replies with a small shrug.
Yunho's expression changes to one of disbelief as he processes her words. "Let me get this straight. You're starving yourself just to fit into some ridiculous outfit?"
Yeonghwa fidgets with the strap of her bag. "It's not like that. It's just... you know, part of the job."
"That's bullshit," Yunho says firmly, his voice low but full of conviction. "No job description should require you to harm your own body."
Yeonghwa raises her head, surprised by his bluntness. "You don't get it. In this industry-"
"In this industry, they see you as a commodity instead of a person," Yunho interrupts. He runs a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated. "I understand the pressure and expectations. But starving yourself? That's fucked up."
Yeonghwa bites her lip, unsure of how to respond. Part of her wants to defend herself, but another part is relieved that someone is acknowledging the truth. "I do eat, just not as much as most people. And it is only for comeback season, after that I go back to eating normally!"
Yunho rolls his eyes. "That's not healthy! As a trainee, I know my company makes sure we are well-fed and taken care of. Yours should be doing the same for you too!”
Yeonghwa is surprised. "You're a trainee?"
Yunho nods, his expression softening. "Yes, at KQ," he confirms. "Okay, new plan. You're coming to lunch with me and my friend."
"What? No, I couldn't possibly-" Yeonghwa starts to protest.
"Yes, you can," he insists firmly. "I won't make you eat if you don't want to. But just come hang out with us for a bit and get away from this place. And I think you'll really like my friend Mingi too!"
“Yunho, I am not allowed to leave the building until my manager picks me up.” she anxiously bites her lower lip, “Or go anywhere without him either.”
Yunho's eyebrows raise in surprise. "Seriously? Are you Rapunzel or something? This is a school, not a prison."
Yeonghwa sighs. "More like a gilded cage."
"Well, consider me your dashing rescuer," Yunho grins, then immediately winces. "Shit, that sounded way less cheesy in my head."
"My knight in shining armour," Yeonghwa deadpans, though there's a small smile on her face.
Yunho leans in and looks around secretively. "Okay, here's the plan. We create a diversion. Smoke bombs might work, or maybe we could train a monkey—"
"A monkey?" Yeonghwa laughs and shakes her head. "As tempting as your primate-powered jailbreak sounds, I really can't risk it. My company would flip their shit if they found out, not to mention Haneul would probably have an a stroke!"
"Yeah, my leader would probably do the same. Hongjoong's head always looks like it's about to pop off, and there aren't many of us training," Yunho chuckles.
“How many is there so far?” she asks with curiosity
“Only four - Hongjoong, Mingi, San, and myself. San joined us fairly recently.” Yunho answers. “There is someone we are trying to poach from another company as well that others are wanting. Hongjoong wants him badly so hopefully we will have a new person soon too.”
“Mingi? The friend you’re meeting for lunch?” Yeonghwa clarifies.
"That's him! We met years ago at a dance academy, and then we both ended up auditioning for the same company without even knowing it. It was fate," he laughs before frowning and tapping his chin thoughtfully. "Okay, new plan 2.0. We'll bring lunch to you. I'll text Mingi and-"
"No!" Yeonghwa's eyes widen in panic. "You can't do that. If anyone sees..."
"Don't worry," Yunho reassures her, holding up his hands. "We'll be stealthy. Like ninjas. Or really clumsy spies."
Yeonghwa hesitates, her lips caught between a smile and worry. "I don't know..."
"Come on," Yunho nudged her playfully. "Live a little. What's the worst that could happen?"
"You want me to give you a list of all the worst things that could happen with that plan?" Yeonghwa arches an eyebrow.
"Point taken," Yunho concedes. "But consider this: free food."
“I honestly can’t anyway because of last nights performance I wasn’t able to finish my homework for our next class so I am on my way to the library.” she says, “But go have lunch with your friend and we can maybe have a ninja picnic another day.”
Yunho sighs dramatically causing Yeonghwa to giggle lightly. "Well, if you change your mind about our super-secret ninja lunch, just give me the signal."
"The signal?" Yeonghwa raises an eyebrow.
"You know, like..." Yunho proceeds to do an elaborate series of hand gestures that look more like a drunk person swatting at invisible flies than any sort of coherent communication.
Yeonghwa bursts out laughing. "What the hell was that supposed to be?"
"Ninja sign language, obviously," Yunho replies with a perfectly straight face. "Don't tell me they didn't teach you that in idol school."
Yeonghwa lets out a scoffing laugh. "I must have skipped that class," she remarks. "I was most likely occupied with perfecting my polite smile and wave, trying not to look like I'm having a fit."
"Ah, crucial life skills," Yunho nods sagely. "Well, I'd better go before I'm late. Can't have my friend thinking I've been abducted by the SOPA aliens."
As he turns to leave, Yeonghwa is hit with a pang of emotion. Is it regret? Longing? She pushes the feeling aside. "Hey, Yunho?"
Yunho stops and turns back with a dramatic flair. "Yes, Yeonghwa the Magnificent?"
She can't help but giggle at his silliness. "You're such a goofball!"
"It's part of my charm," Yunho grins. "But seriously, what's on your mind?"
Yeonghwa hesitates, fidgeting with the strap of her bag. "I just wanted to say thank you. You’ve treated me like a normal person instead of some alien life form or a walking photo op."
"I can see you,” Yunho's face softens into a genuine smile. “…for you! No one else.” Yeonghwa feels her stomach flip lightly at his words, “Beside, I’m pretty sure you’re way too short to be an alien!” and a cheeky grin emerges
"Excuse me?" Yeonghwa gasps in mock offence. "I'll have you know I'm perfectly average height."
"For a hobbit, maybe," Yunho teases.
"Oh, that's rich coming from you, Godzilla," Yeonghwa retorts, surprising herself with how easy this banter feels.
Yunho clutches his chest dramatically. "Ouch! Wounded by the tiny terror!"
"Keep it up and I'll aim lower next time," Yeonghwa threatens, but there's no heat in it.
"Noted," Yunho chuckles. “I’ll see you back in class after lunch and I’ll bring you a little something too!” With a final wave, he disappears down the hallway, leaving Yeonghwa with an unfamiliar feeling of warmth in her chest. She shook her head, trying to clear it. She had homework to do, after all. No time for... whatever this was.
But as she made her way to the library, she couldn't help wonder what it might be like to have a friend like Yunho. Someone who saw her as Kim Yeonghwa, not Aria from Moonlight. Someone who made her laugh instead of want to disappear.
She sighs, pushing the thought away. It was a nice fantasy, but that's all it was. Fantasy. Reality was school, homework, diets, gruelling rehearsals, performing and the constant pressure to be perfect 24/7. That was her world, and no amount of ninja sign language was going to change that.
Right?
But… for the first time in months, Yeonghwa felt a glimmer of hope. Maybe, just maybe, she had found a friend in this sea of isolation.
⭑2020⭑
Yeonghwa quickly scans the audience and her fellow idols sitting beside her. The award show is in full swing now, with some awards already handed out and performances from various bands. Moonlight is scheduled to perform second to last, so she and her four bandmates - Jinni, Areum, Misty, and their leader Haneul - have some time to enjoy the show before preparing for their performance. She notices numerous fans filming with their phones focused on her and her fellow idols. Making sure to acknowledge as many as she can, Yeonghwa waves at the cameras, particularly those with her name or the group's name on banners.
She turns her head to the right and locks eyes with someone. Her gaze immediately drops, avoiding those all-too-familiar big brown eyes that have been making her heart flutter since she first saw them four years ago - Yunho.
She knew he would be here with his band Ateez; it was announced weeks ago when the lineup was revealed. But she never expected to end up sitting next to him with only Hongjoong and Haneul between them.
It had been 4 years since that day in the school hallway, when they shared ninja sign language and laughter that brightened her world. But so much had changed since then. They both graduated, Yunho debuted with Ateez, and their careers took them in different directions. What followed that first day was a beautiful friendship that blossomed into something deeper - but now, Yeonghwa is to blame for the fact that there is nothing left between them.
Nearly 2 years has passed since the last time she saw him face to face, the last time she ever spoke to him and it was bad. She said hurtful things, trying to push him away and protect him as he prepared for his debut. Though they never officially labelled themselves as a couple, their feelings for each other were undeniable. Walking away from him was one of the most difficult choices Yeonghwa ever made, but deep down she knew it was for the best for both of them
She can't resist stealing another glance at him. He's focused on the stage now, but when Seonghwa leans over and whispers something in his ear, he bursts out laughing. He looks even more handsome than before, with his boyish features now fully matured into those of a man. Yeonghwa liked how their stylist had picked each of their outfits, but Yunhos was perfect for him. They all looked so much more grown up since the last time she saw them all face to face.
A tap on her shoulder startles her from her thoughts. It's Misty, her best friend in the group. "Your staring is going to be trending on SNS if you don’t stop," she whispers with a smirk.
Yeonghwa feels her face heat up. "I wasn't staring."
Misty rolls her eyes. "Just like you weren't staring at MAMA, or KBS Song Festival, or-"
"I get it," Yeonghwa hisses, sinking lower in her seat. “It is just weird being THIS close to him. At least at the other award shows he was sat at the opposite side, far away from me!”
Misty was well aware of the past between Yunho and Yeonghwa; after all, it was Misty who had Yeonghwa had confided in her about it all at the time. She could only imagine how difficult this must have been for Yeonghwa.
Misty's expression softens. "Have you ever thought about talking to him? Clearing the air? I think if he knew the real reason you did what you did, he would understand."
Yeonghwa shakes her head firmly. "No, that's out of the question. It's been two years, Misty. He's probably moved on by now. And after what I said to him, I'm sure he hates me. As he should."
"You don't know that," Misty argues gently. "Maybe he-"
"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, ATEEZ!"
The announcement cuts through their conversation, and Yeonghwa's head snaps up. She watches, heart pounding, as Yunho and his group take the stage. Their performance is electric, full of the passion and energy that has made them one of the hottest new groups in K-pop. But Yeonghwa can't take her eyes off Yunho.
In high school, she had always been impressed by his innate dancing skills. He had taught her so much about it back then, but now he moves with a newfound confidence and fluidity that leaves her speechless. His voice, deeper and more mature than it was in their school days, sends tingles down her spine. For a fleeting moment, their gazes lock across the bustling venue, and Yeonghwa is completely captivated, unable to catch her breath.
The performance ends, and ATEEZ heads back to their seats. Yeonghwa avoids looking at Yunho as he walks by, but she can sense his presence like a magnetic force. Memories of their time together flood her mind - the laughter, the secret moments, the way he made her feel alive and real beyond her stage persona - it all rushes back with intense clarity, as if it just happened yesterday.
She remembers the last day she ever spoke to him, the way his face crumpled when she told him she didn't love him. It was the biggest lie she'd ever told, but she convinced herself it was for the best. They had just graduated from SOPA by weeks, Moonlight were about to embark on another world tour, one that would take her away from Korea for 4 months, he was deep into preparations for his debut which included a one month trip to LA to do in depth training in dance and vocals, and she couldn't bear the thought of holding him back or being a scandal that could ruin his career before it even began.
So she walked away, ignoring the shattering of her own heart with each step. She threw herself into her work, into being the perfect idol, the perfect Aria. But late at night, when the stage lights dimmed and the screams of the fans faded, she allowed herself to remember. To miss him.
Now, standing face to face with him again, it's like a wound she thought had healed has been torn open once more. His voice echoes in her mind from that fateful day, loud and clear over the blaring music in the arena.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
"Yeonghwa, please. I love you!"
"I don't love you. So just leave me alone." With those words, Yeonghwa turns and walks out of Yunho's dorm room, startled when she sees Mingi's cold stare from the hallway. He had overheard their conversation.
“When did you become such a cold heartless bitch?” he asks
Yeonghwa takes a deep breath, his words cutting her deep but she knows she deserves him for the hurt she’s just inflicted on his best friend.
“Maybe it is who I’ve always been.” she says, she knows she needs to keep up the cold facade with Mingi too to make sure none of them come to her again
“I warned him not to trust an idol when he told me about you. Told him they were mostly selfish and out for themselves but he insisted you were different,” Mingi says, walking closer to her. “Then I met you and thought the same. You seemed genuine - funny, kind, and genuinely cared for him. Well, it turns out you were just a gifted manipulator. You fooled all of us.”
Yeonghwa remains silent, her heart heavy with guilty and regret. Mingi’s words sting, but she knows she can’t defend herself right now. She needs to let him believe the words he is saying about her.
"It's probably best if you leave now," Hongjoong's harsh voice comes from behind Mingi as the sound of Yunho's sobs grows louder.
Yeonghwa grabs her bag and walks out their dorm. Her heart shattering into a million pieces with every step.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
Yeonghwa glances over at him, and catches him laughing with his other members. She starts to look away, but then their eyes meet and she sees the warmth and familiarity that was once there years ago. Everything seems to blur out around the both of them, they may as well be the only two people in this large arena as they look at one another.
But then reality hits her - they are not alone. Yeonghwa snaps out of her daze, remembering that they are surrounded by thousands of fans and cameras that could capture this moment. As she looks away, Yunho gives her a subtle nod and slight smile, causing her heart to race with emotion.
Yunho tries to suppress a wide smile as she looks away shyly from him, the same way she always did when he made her flustered. Even after all this time, the words that had been said, the heartbreak he endured in the aftermath - he can still see her.
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<m.list> ⋆ <next>
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silver-hwaberry · 6 months ago
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A mini preview of an upcoming fic I am going to start working on.
I Can See You
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Pairing: Idol!Yunho x Idol!FemOC
Genre: romance, smut, angst, forbidden love,
Preview:
--2016--
Yeonghwa let out a heavy sigh as she plopped into her usual seat at the back of the classroom. The School of Performing Arts Seoul was both a blessing and a curse for Yeonghwa, being the youngest member of the popular K-pop girl group Moonlight. As she gazes around the room, she could feel the weight of the judgemental stares and harsh whispers following her every move which was a daily occurrence when she attended school. Despite her fame, high school was still a daily struggle for Yeonghwa.
Even though she had debuted two years earlier and found success, she was still only 17 years old and had to attend high school in Korea. Her hectic schedule often kept her from attending class and made it difficult for her to keep up with her studies compared to her peers. She was also the only member of her group who was still in school. The pressure of being a popular idol while also trying to maintain her education was overwhelming. However, it was a requirement set by her parents when they allowed her to move from Yeosu-si to Seoul at the age of 13 to become a trainee. "Don't forget about your education," they told her, and she was determined to make them proud by excelling in both areas.
As she pulls out her textbooks, she feels the weight of dozens of eyes on her.
"Did you see her performance last night?" “What was she even wearing? It was hideous!” “Her ass is way too big to be wearing that skirt last night! It would have looked much better on Jinni instead.” “No way, Haneul would have rocked that outfit! Don’t know why they give it to her!” “Probably because she would have had a tantrum at someone else being centre of attention. Little Miss Attention Seeking once again!” "They need to kick her out of the band, Areum is a much better dancer and she can actually rap too.”
The murmurs swirl around her, a constant reminder that she didn't belong here. Yeonghwa keeps her head down, trying to focus on the lesson ahead. Just as the teacher was about to begin, the classroom door swung open.
"Sorry I'm late!" A tall boy with a kind smile rushes in, bowing apologetically to the teacher.
“You must be the new transfer student to my class!” The teacher says
“That’s me!” he grins
“Everyone…. this young man…” the teacher says awkwardly, clearly not knowing the young mans name, “will be joining our class. Be nice to him!”
“He is so handsome!” Yeonghwa hears from the girl infront of her
“You can sit over there, beside Aria!” the teacher points at the empty seat beside her
Yeonghwa feels her chest tighten as some quiet laughs are heard around the room. She hated people calling her by her stage name. As he makes his way to his seat, his eyes meet Yeonghwas. Instead of the usual judgement or disdain she was used to, she saw warmth.
The boy slides into the empty desk beside her. "Hi," he whispers, offering a friendly grin. "You're Yeonghwa, right?"
Yeonghwa nods cautiously, waiting for the other shoe to drop. But his smile only widens. "It is nice to meet you! I'm Yunho!"
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silver-hwaberry · 6 months ago
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TWENTY-THREE: secrets and kisses
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Warnings: under clothes touching, talk of mental health, anxiety and a mention of scars (no exact details!), oral sex (m & f receiving), fingering
Word Count: 8.2k
Summary: Jongho sees something he shouldn't, the guys have a secret meeting to talk about Lunas anxiety and Luna spends her final night in LA.
((Banners: @cafekitsune))
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Jongho begins to stir as he hears his alarm start to go off. He can feel a warm feeling on his side and opens his eyes to see Luna is curled fully into him. Still sleeping soundly, snores coming from her mouth. It isn’t too loud but they aren’t as soft as they were when she fell asleep the night before. Jongho can’t help but smile as he looks at her.
Never having experienced waking up with someone beside him that is not one of his members, this is new to him but he likes it. He closes his eyes for a moment, relishing the feeling of Luna's warmth against him. Her soft breath tickles his neck and cheek, and her arm across his waist feels like a gentle weight.
He doesn't want to disturb her peaceful slumber, but he knows he cannot stay in bed any longer. The band has a photoshoot scheduled for today, and he is the first on the list for hair and makeup after losing a game of rock, paper, scissors with his bandmates the other night. With great care, he disentangles himself from her embrace, trying not to wake her. Her body stirs slightly as he carefully slips out of bed and makes his way to the bathroom on bare feet. He shuts the door quietly behind him, not wanting to disturb her rest.
The cold, tiled floor startles him awake. He turns on the shower and steps in, feeling the hot water splash over his body before adjusting it to a more comfortable temperature. As steam fills the small bathroom, he leans against the smooth tiles and closes his eyes, taking a brief moment to relax. Two days ago, he couldn't have imagined himself in this situation - sharing a bed with Luna. It's a new experience, but it feels surprisingly comforting and familiar.
After he has washed his hair and body, he turns off the water and steps out, feeling rejuvenated. The mirror is fogged up, but he clears a small spot with his hand to catch a glimpse of himself. There's something different about him today—a lightness in his expression he hadn’t noticed before.
He continues with his morning routine of brushing his teeth, doing his skincare and gets changed before going back into the room. He sees Luna is sitting upright, she hasn’t seen him come in yet as she puts something into her mouth and drinks from a bottle of water. As she sees him walk in she quickly grabs a bottle of pills sitting beside her, stuffing it into the little bag she brought with her. Jongho notices but can see slight panic in her eyes as she moves the bag behind her back.
“Did I wake you up?” he asks as she replaces the cap on the bottle of water
“Not at all! My alarm went off like 5 minutes ago.” she says, shifting her body slightly to hide the bag
“Sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up. I had to get a shower as I am first on the list for hair and make up today.” he says rubbing a towel over his wet hair. “I lost the game of rock, paper, scissors the other day.” he adds with a small chuckle
“Oh you should have told me!” she says standing up, “I would have got up earlier and left to give you space to get sorted.”
“Absolutely not!” he says moving towards her, his arms instantly wrapping around her waist.
Luna looks up at him, her hands holding onto his upper arms. “I just know today will be busy for you all. I don’t want to get in the way of you getting ready for it.”
“You could never be in the way.” he smiles
“Sorry for falling asleep last night.” she says quietly as he gazes into her eyes
“Don’t apologise, you were clearly tired.” he replies leaning down to kiss her.
Luna melts into the kiss, her hands moving up to his shoulders. She can taste the mint from his toothpaste on his lips and the smell of his shampoo as she inhales deeply. Their moment is interrupted by the sound of Jongho's phone ringing from the nightstand. He gives Luna an apologetic look before answering it as she nods understandingly. After a brief conversation, he ends the call and turns back to Luna.
“Sorry, that was Hajoon.” Jongho explains, “Hair and make up is nearly set up.” he adds
“Okay, I’ll get my stuff to go back to my room then.” she says
“You don’t need to leave right now. Just take your time getting ready. Once I’ve gone you can stay here as long as you want to.” he says. “Plus I have 10 more minutes until I need to go.” he adds with a small smirk
His arms wrap around her waist once more and he steers her towards the bed. She giggles as they fall onto it with Jongho above her. “And what do you propose we do to fill those 10 minutes?” Her arms move around his shoulders, one of her hands playing with the back of his damp hair
He grins, that charming, mischievous grin that never fails to make her heart race. “I have a few ideas,” he teases, his breath warm against her cheek. He leans closer, the weight of him both comforting and exhilarating, as if the world outside has faded away.
Jongho captures Lunas lips in a tender yet passionate kiss. Time seems to stand still as they lose themselves in one another. In the heat of the moment, Luna inhales sharply as Jongho's hand slides under her tshirt. Sensing his hesitation, she takes charge and slips her own hand underneath the collar of his shirt, while wrapping her legs around his waist as a signal for him to keep going. His hand moves further up, holding onto her side until he reaches her bra.
“You can touch me if you want Jjong.” she mumbles against his lips feeling his hesitation once again
Jongho's hand freezes as he processes Luna's words. He pulls back slightly, a mix of desire and uncertainty in his eyes. "Are you sure? I mean, I want to, but..."
Luna can't help but giggle at his adorable nervousness. "Jjong, if I wasn't sure, I wouldn't have my legs wrapped around you like a panda on a bamboo tree."
His laughter is muffled as he snorts and buries his face in her neck. "You're comparing yourself to a panda now?"
"Hey, they're adorable and cuddly," she defends herself, running her fingers through his hair. "I love pandas!"
Jongho lifts his head, a playful glint in his eye. "So does that make me a tree?"
"Mm, a very handsome tree," Luna teases, pulling him closer for another kiss
They both moan softly into the kiss, their bodies responding to each other's touches. Jongho's hand gently cups Luna's breast over her bra, his thumb brushing against the sensitive nipple through the fabric as his lips move down to her neck. She arches into his touch, wanting more. Her other hand slips further under his shirt, tracing patterns on his upper back as she feels his warm skin. The sound of their breathing grows heavier, mirroring the quickening pace of their hearts. The feeling of him grinding his core against her causes her to dip her nails into his skin lightly.
“Fuck, I really wish I hadn’t lost that game the other day.” Jongho mumbles, “I want to stay here longer with you.”
Luna trails her hands down his back, feeling the muscles tense under her touch. "You know, I could get used to this side of you."
He grins against her skin, his lips leaving a trail of heat as he moves back up to capture her mouth in another searing kiss. "I could get used to it too," he murmurs between kisses, his hands exploring the curves of her body with eager fingers.
As things are heating up between them, a loud banging on the door startles them both.
"Yah! Jongho!" Mingi's voice booms through the door.
Jongho groans, dropping his forehead to Luna's shoulder. "Fuck sake, Mingi," he mutters.
Luna can't help but giggle. "Looks like our ten minutes are up, Romeo."
"Hajoon sent me! I will break down this door, if I have to!" Mingi threatens.
"Alright, alright! I'm coming!" Jongho yells back, running a hand through his damp hair.
Luna sits up, adjusting her t-shirt with an amused smirk. "Better not keep him waiting. He sounds serious about that door."
"He couldn't break down a paper bag." Jongho rolls his eyes playfully. “I wish I could stay with you longer, sweetheart.” He leans in for another kiss.
“I guess we got a bit carried away there.” she blushes
“A little but we have somewhere to pick up from next time.” he grins kissing her once more kiss as she pulls him closer. Their tongues tangled in a heated dance, exploring each other's mouths while their bodies pressed against one another.
“Come on Jongho! I am second in line and if you are late it means I will be too!” Mingi shouts knocking the door louder causing him to pull back from her sighing loudly
“Mingi, chill out!” Jongho says going to the door
As he opens it, Mingi's fist is raised, ready to knock again. "Finally! What were you doing in there, writing a novel?"
“None of your business.” Jongho grumbles turning back into the room to pick up his keycard and phone as Mingi follows him in
Mingi's eyes widen as he enters the room and sees Luna sitting on the bed, brushing her hair. He quickly apologises for not knowing she was inside.
“It’s cool.” she smiles at him as Jongho goes back over to her
“You can stay as long as you need to, order yourself room service.” he says quietly, “I’ll see you at the photoshoot right?”
"Absolutely," Luna nods and smiles at him widely
“See you later.” he returns the smile and leans down to kiss her
Mingi watches on, his eyebrows raised at witnessing his youngest member being so affectionate for the first time ever. As Jongho and Luna share a lingering kiss, he clears his throat awkwardly. "Uh, guys? I'm still here, you know."
Jongho breaks away from Luna, shooting Mingi an annoyed look. "Yeah, unfortunately."
Mingi raises his hands in defense. "I'm just the messenger," he says, trying to avoid any blame. "Hajoon will be on your case if you're late."
“Be nice to Mingi,” Luna giggles, her fingers hold onto Jonghos shirt, "He didn't do anything wrong and he has a point. We don't want to annoy Hajoon." She reaches up to cup his cheek, “I’ll see you later though so get your butt down to hair and make up.” she adds as she can see he is having difficulty in leaving.
Jongho rolls his eyes playfully and leans down for one last quick kiss. "I'll see you later, panda girl." he whispers as she giggles lightly
“Is that my new nickname?” she laughs
Jongho nods before finally turning to leave. Mingi puts his hands on Jonghos shoulder playfully steering him towards the door. “Bye princess.” he says towards Luna blowing her a kiss.
“See ya Mingi.” she smiles back at him pretending to catch his kiss and placing it on her cheek causing him to laugh
As the door closes behind them Luna looks around the room as she is left alone in Jonghos hotel room. She runs a hand through her semi-tangled hair.
Suddenly, her phone buzzes on the coffee table, breaking her reverie. She reaches for it, half-expecting to see a message from Jongho, but instead it’s a text from Jieun.
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Luna smiles as she puts her phone back on the table. It had been a while since she saw her friends and it would be nice to hang out when she is back in Seoul.
She chuckles to herself, shaking her head fondly as she remembers the nickname "Lobster Lulu." It was given to her in college after she fell asleep on a sunbed and got a bit burnt. The name stuck throughout college and anytime someone mentioned sunburn or sunscreen, "Lobster Lulu" was sure to come up in conversation but it had been a while since anyone called her it.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Yunho walks down the corridor towards Hongjoong's room, his footsteps deliberate and purposeful. He was taken aback when Hongjoong requested everyone to gather in his room after a long and tiring day on the photoshoot. When San inquired about the meeting's purpose, the tension in Hongjoong's face did not escape Yunho's notice, especially when he insisted on keeping Luna in the dark.
As he reaches Hongjoong's door, he taps on it lightly, and within moments, Hongjoong swings it open, ushering him inside. The room is already filled with the rest of the group, their expressions a mix of curiosity and concern, eager for the reason behind this impromptu gathering.
"Thank you all for coming, I know you must be busy preparing for tomorrows flight," Hongjoong begins, his voice tinged with uncertainty.
"What's this about?" Mingi cuts in with a direct question.
“And why couldn’t we tell Luna?” San asks. He feels guilty for keeping this from her especially as she asked him if he wanted to watch another episode of The Sound of Magic. After Hongjoong asking them not to mention the meeting to Luna, he had to lie to her. Telling her that Hongjoong usually calls a band meeting on the final night when they are away. When she asked if it was anything important, the guilt of lying further ate away at him, telling her it was nothing, just a leader talk.
"It involves Luna, and I was unsure how to bring it up to her," Hongjoong confesses, pacing nervously with his hands fidgeting with his shirt. The others notice it and it increases their worry. "We need to address how we'll handle... if Luna experiences another panic attack during tomorrow's flight."
A wave of unease washes over the group as they digest his words.
"I never want to witness that again," Yeosang whispers softly. "The last time was.. awful."
"I felt utterly helpless," Wooyoung chimes in, nodding in solidarity.
Yunho interjects gently, breaking the hush that settled over them. "Luna's wellbeing is crucial - so we must be prepared."
Mingi furrows his brow with a hint of concern in his tone. "Do we know what triggers her panic attacks precisely?"
"She told me that takeoff and landing are particularly triggering for her, she just doesn’t like that part at all." Seonghwa responds. “During the actual flight, she is fine.”
“So she doesn’t have an actual fear of flying then? Just taking off and landing?” Jongho asks, his gaze focused on Seonghwa who nods in reply.
“She has medication right? I saw her taking something during it.” San says
“Yeah, anxiety medication.” Yeosang confirms recalling how she couldn’t open the bottle
“Does Luna take anxiety medication regularly?” Wooyoung asks
“She told me her… erm,” Yeosang hesitates, unsure about disclosing more until the expectant gazes urge him on. “Her therapist prescribed them for whenever things get too much.”
“So it seems like it isn’t something she takes on a daily basis then,” San concludes logically.
Jongho swallows hard, memories of the morning replaying in his mind when he stumbled upon Luna discreetly taking medication. How she hastily concealed the bottle.
“I think she may be struggling with anxiety more than we realise,” he admits quietly.
“What makes you think that?” Yunho asks
Jongho hesitates before confessing, “She slept in my room last night.” He shifts uncomfortably, feeling the weight of their stares. “This morning, I saw her taking some medication, she quickly hid a pill bottle when I walked in from the bathroom. I pretended not to notice as she clearly didn’t want me to see and I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.”
Hongjoong, Seonghwa, and Yunho share knowing looks, understanding the gravity of Jongho’s implication that the medication Luna was taking was likely for her bipolar disorder, not anxiety. They had been aware of her discreet morning routine of taking her medication when she believed no one was watching.
“So she was taking anxiety meds this morning,” San reflects with a furrowed brow, “Did something happen during the photo shoot?”
“I didn’t notice anything unusual,” Wooyoung interjects with a practical tone. “She was quiet like she always is at work but she was busier than usual with a lot of translating between us, the staff and photographer. Could the prospect of all the translating was weighing on her mind?”
“She never gets anxious about translating! We all know how much she loves it and shes been in her element the last few days here in LA.” Mingi adds thoughtfully and they all nod in agreement, “It must be something else. How was she the night before?” he turns to Jongho for insights.
Jongho can feel his cheeks and ears begin to flush. Although nothing happened between the two of them except a lot of kissing. He knew most of them were assuming they’d been intimate last night. “She was fine. We watched a movie, had dinner then she suddenly fell asleep as I was putting the dishes outside the room.”
“She tends to get sleepy after eating so much; that's normal for her,” Yunho reasons
“How did she sleep? Was she tossing or turning a lot? Or restless?” Hongjoong asks
“Actually she barely moved, woke up very briefly when I got into bed after my shower, moved a bit but she fell straight back to sleep again and when I woke up… she was in the same position she went to sleep in.” he answers
“Curled into you?” Seonghwa asks with a slight smile on his face, very familiar with Lunas sleeping habits now as Jongho simply nods, feeling all eyes on him
“What about this morning?” Wooyoung probes further.
“She was still sleeping when I woke up so I had a shower, but she was awake by the time I finished. That’s when I saw her taking her medication, but she seemed okay. In fact, she seemed quite content,” he replies, omitting the details of their passionate encounter before he left for hair and makeup.
“Yeah she did seem to be in good spirits when I came to get you.” Mingi nods, “And when she arrived on the set too.”
At the last minute, Luna and the guys had to take separate cars to the location. Initially, Hongjoong was displeased with the change in plans, but when he saw how stressed Myeonjin was with other issues going wrong, he didn’t push it any further. So Luna went ahead with Hyunsik and some other staff members to do some translating work, leaving no time for anyone to speak to her before the shoot began. When the guys car finally arrived at the location, she was in a good mood, chatting and joking with Hyunsik as the stylists quickly got to work perfecting the guys' outfits. No one spoke to her before or during the shoot, except for in a professional manner.
“There is something else.” Jongho says, capturing the attention of the group once more. “I don’t know if it is something to be concerned with or maybe, was just a passing thing in the moment but at the start of our date.. she seemed uneasy over who knew about us.”
Yunho’s heart quickens as he asks, “What happened?”
"Well," Jongho pauses, gathering his thoughts. "She asked me who knew about us and when I reassured her that it was okay and no one would judge us, she muttered under her breath 'maybe not you guys'." He hesitates again before continuing, "I didn't push for more information, but I think...she might be afraid of being judged by others for being with us."
Yunho exchanges a glance with Yeosang, they were the only two who knew of her feelings. “I thought I had reassured her about that,” he sighs, rubbing the back of his head.
Wooyoung's tone is sharp, cutting through the tension in the room. "You knew she was feeling that way?"
Wooyoung's piercing gaze drills into Yunho, causing him to stumble over his words. He takes a moment to carefully think of his response. "She was afraid that being intimate with more than one of us in the same day would alter our perception of her," Yunho admits
Hongjoong's brow furrows, his expression filled with concern. "She thinks we're judging her?" A pang of guilt hits him, knowing that their actions may have caused Luna to worry.
"No, not at all!" Yunho shakes his head in response. "She was just worried that we might judge her in the future, but she trusts us and promised to come talk to me if those feelings ever resurface."
“I'm starting to get concerned about her. It's worrying if she's keeping her medication a secret,” Mingi chimes in, his voice tinged with concern. Hongjoong, Seonghwa, and Yunho exchange glances once again. “You three keep sharing looks - is there something you know that we don't?” he adds, noticing their shared expressions.
Yunho gazes at Mingi, conflicted about keeping secrets from his closest friend. However, he knows that Luna is not prepared for the others to know just yet; this is something she needs to handle in her own time. "It's nothing really," Yunho reassures him. "We're just worried. As the three eldest, we feel a strong sense of responsibility towards her."
Mingi studies Yunho, his gaze perceptive and understanding. He chooses to trust his friend's words, nodding in acceptance, though a flicker of doubt lingers in his mind.
“We must tread carefully,” Yeosang remarks, “we don’t want her to feel ganged up on. Yet, her secrecy with medication worries me.”
San gets straight to the point. "I think we should talk to her about this. It's important for us to address our concerns, but we also need to maintain her trust," he states firmly. “If she knew we were talking about her like this, it might push her away.”
Seonghwa softly agrees, “And that is the last thing we want!”
“Let's focus on getting her ready for tomorrow's flight first,” Hongjoong suggests. “We can address other concerns once we are back in the safety of our home.”
“Yunho helped her last time, maybe we should make sure he sits beside her on the plane?” Wooyoung suggests
“I just helped her breathe, reminding her she was safe. I honestly didn’t do anything any one of us couldn’t do for her.” Yunho replies. “In-flight, she relaxed with Yeosang next to her and with him for landing too.”
“She took her medication an hour before we landed, she was a lot more calmer.” Yeosang says, “Why not ask her who she'd prefer beside her? It lets her choose without feeling controlled.”
“That is a good idea!” Seonghwa agrees as everyone nods. “She already told me that this time she’ll take her medication before the flight too.”
Lunas exact words to Seonghwa were ‘I won't repeat the same mistake and have another embarrassing fucking breakdown in the middle of a flight, so I'll take it no matter how I feel beforehand!’
“Okay, so lets just keep her as relaxed as possible before boarding, ask her who she wants to sit beside beforehand too. Like last time, she’ll board before us and when we arrive, we just make sure she is happy but above all chilled out!” Hongjoong says
"Got it, so Operation: Keep Luna Chill is a go?" Wooyoung jokes, trying to lighten the mood.
San rolls his eyes playfully. "Really? We're giving it a name now?"
"What? It's catchy!" Wooyoung defends, grinning.
Mingi snorts. "Yeah, about as catchy as that time you tried to nickname our dance practice 'Operation: Don't Fuck Up on Stage'."
"At least my names are memorable," Wooyoung huffs, crossing his arms.
"Yeah, memorably bad," Jongho quips, earning a collective snicker from the group.
Hongjoong pinches the bridge of his nose, fighting back a grin. "Can we please focus?"
"Sorry," Wooyoung mumbles, not looking sorry at all. "But admit it, you love my creative genius."
San leans over, patting Wooyoung's shoulder. "We love you despite it, not because of it."
The entire room erupts into laughter as Wooyoung just looks shocked.
"Ouch," Wooyoung clutches his chest dramatically. "Et tu, San?"
Hongjoong claps his hands, drawing everyone's attention. "Alright, enough teasing. Let's wrap this up so we can all get on with our packing."
“So, to sum up, our main goals are to keep Luna calm, let her choose who she sits next to, and ensure she takes her medication beforehand,” Yunho explains.
Hongjoong nods with satisfaction. “It sounds like we have a solid plan now. I'll leave you guys to go back to what you were doing. Speaking of Luna, does anyone know what she's doing tonight?”
"She's packing now," San replies, "I'm going to help her and then we are watching an episode of The Sound of Magic."
"That's good," Yunho smiles, "She won't be alone tonight."
“If she needs any help with packing again, give me a text.” Seonghwa says as the others begin to make their way to the door and they all exchange good nights.
The door clicks shut behind them, leaving Seonghwa, Yunho, and Hongjoong alone in tense silence as they share a weary look before Yunho breaks it with a frustrated sigh.
“What should we do now?” He exclaims, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “They suspect it's anxiety medication she was taking this morning, when it was probably her bipolar medication!”
Hongjoong leans against the wall with his arms crossed. “We promised to help her,” he says gently, reminding them of their commitment.
“I know and I will, but now they're worried about her,” Yunho says, “You both know that they won’t let this lie, especially Wooyoung and San.”
“We have to tell her what Jongho saw and what the others are thinking now.” Seonghwa sighs softly, “But I don’t want to put any pressure on her to do something she isn’t ready for.”
Yunho hesitates, struggling to find the right words. "I think she should disclose her bipolar disorder to them now."
"Yun, she's not ready for that," Seonghwa disagrees, shaking his head.
"But if we assure her that there's nothing to be afraid of..." Yunho suggests.
“She’s fucking terrified!” Seonghwa interjects. His tone and choice of words make both Yunho and Hongjoong turn to look at him. “She’s afraid we’ll think she’s not good enough, worried we’ll tell her to leave! The night I found out she..” his voice falters slightly “she said our relationship couldn’t work with the secrets.”
Hongjoong winces at the thought. “She really believes we’d push her away?”
“You didn’t witness how distraught she was at her parents when her mom let it slip - crying on the bathroom floor, her entire body shaking. Neither of you saw the fear in her face as she told me about her scars, the way she couldn’t even look me in the eyes as she spoke about what happened to her.” Seonghwa answers “She feels like she is living a lie around us, and it's eating her alive. But it's her decision when she decides to open up about this part of herself.”
“I completely understand that but what about the others?” Yunho says, concern etched into his brow. “They’ll feel betrayed if they find out we kept this from them.”
“They'll have to come to terms with it,” Seonghwa responds calmly. “Luna's story belongs to her and she gets to choose when and how she shares it.”
A contemplative silence follows before Hongjoong adds, “When Luna told you, Yunho, it was because she trusts you completely. That's why it was easier for her. She's not ready for everyone else to know yet, and we have to respect that.”
Yunho's shoulders sag slightly as he processes the two elders words. “I know you're right,” he admits. “I am just worried the others will be annoyed at us. We are a team and have always shared everything.”
Seonghwa places a reassuring hand on Yunho's shoulder. "We are still a team, Yunho. What matters most right now is Luna's trust in us. The others will come to understand that in due time, I have no doubt about that."
“You are right.” Yunho nods, “Looking after her is important.”
Hongjoong uncrosses his arms and steps closer to Yunho and Seonghwa. "We’ll be there for her, Yunho. We just need to respect her boundaries and allow her take the lead on when and how she shares her bipolar disorder."
"Let's focus on getting through tomorrow's flight first; then we can discuss with her what Jongho saw and our conversation tonight when we are home and settled." Seonghwa says calmly, despite the tension in the room.
Yunho inhales deeply, bracing himself for the difficult conversation ahead. "I hope she understands how much we care for her and only want what's best for her."
As they stand together in quiet determination, a sense of unity washes over them. They know the road ahead won't be easy, but they are resolved to walk it together, supporting Luna through whatever challenges may come their way.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
With a book in her hand, Luna sits alone in her hotel room, eagerly awaiting San's arrival. It's the first night she has spent in her own room since they arrived in LA; the previous nights were spent in Yunhos, Hongjoongs for 2 nights in a row, and Jonghos' rooms respectively.
It had been a very long day on the photoshoot, lots of translations needed but overall Luna was impressed with how the members were communicating with the photographer and his team. She had been so nervous about this trip and now it was nearly over she didn’t know what she was even nervous for. She loved every second of it.
However she missed the guys a lot. Despite being with them every day, it was in a work environment and everything was kept professional. There hadn’t been much time to see them all together after work either as they either had solo schedules or it was late. She couldn't wait to return to the comfort and safety of their apartment
When Luna hears a knock at her hotel door she throws her book to one side, not even bookmarking the page to run to the door. She opens it to see San on the other side causing her to smile widely and let him in. As the door softly shuts, he draws her into a tender kiss, their lips melding together in sweet synchrony. Luna's arms envelop his sturdy frame, drawing him nearer as they lose themselves in each other's embrace, both smile blissfully into the kiss.
“I missed you,” he whispers as their lips part, “and your sweet kisses.” he adds, his hand running through her hair before cupping the back of her head and pecking her lips gently.
It had been days since they were last alone and able to show affection for one another like this. Back at home, San and Luna are very tactile with one another. Whenever they are near one another, they are usually touching each other in some way from a simple arm around a waist, a hand resting on a leg or back. They both longed for these simple yet meaningful connections that they shared.
“Me too!” she says with a contented sigh “How was the group meeting?”
“It was… dull.” San responds as they enter the room, “Hows the packing?” he asks, trying to change the subject.
“All finished!” Luna exclaims proudly, pointing to the neatly packed suitcase in the corner. “It's always easier to pack when you're going home than when you're leaving,” she adds with a small laugh.
"That's true!" San exclaims with a smile. "So, are you ready for the next episode of The Sound of Magic?"
Luna takes a step closer, lightly tracing her fingers along the edge of his waistband. "Actually, I had something else in mind,"
Curious, San asks, "And what might that be?" Luna's hands move to unbuckle his belt.
“I was thinking you deserve a special treat after all your hard work,” she whispers seductively in his ear before playfully nibbling on it.
“Luna!” he says softly wide-eyed as he catches on to what she wants
Luna swiftly guides San to the armchair, gently but firmly pushing him into its soft cushions. She then sinks down to her knees on the floor before him, surprising him with her unexpected move. San's bewildered look quickly turns to curiosity as he watches her intently. Luna grins at his stunned reaction and playfully asks, "Why so speechless?"
San swallows hard, his voice cracking slightly. "I, uh... wasn't expecting this kind of treat."
Luna chuckles softly at his reaction, locking eyes with him as she continues to unzip Sans jeans. "Well, expect the unexpected when you're with me," she quips playfully.
Luna's hand slips into San's underwear, her fingers wrapping around his throbbing shaft. Her touch is a perfect balance of softness and pressure, sending waves of pleasure through San's body. He can't contain a quiet moan as she releases him from the constraints of his boxers.
San's breath catches in his throat as Luna's touch sends tingles down his spine. "I... I'm not complaining though," he says, his voice thick with longing. "Just caught off guard."
He shifts his hips to remove his jeans, seeking more comfort. Luna helps by tossing his clothes aside before moving back in front of him. She keeps her eyes locked on his while she lowers her head. San can't help but gasp as she traces kisses along his shaft up to the tip. A smirk graces Luna's lips as she takes him into her mouth, expertly using her tongue to swirl around his head while her hands move in perfect rhythm, squeezing and stroking him the way she know he likes.
San's head falls back against the chair, a string of profanities escaping his lips as he groans deeply. His hips reflexively buck as she takes him deeper into her mouth, the warmth of her breath and the vibrations of her moans sending shivers down his spine.
Luna pulls away, releasing San with a soft pop. She looks up at him with a playful twinkle in her eye. "How are you liking your little treat?"
"Sunshine, you're going to make me lose my mind," he chuckles deeply.
With her hand still working its magic on San as she moves closer to his face, a mischievous grin spreading across her lips. "That's exactly what I want," She whispers in his ear, her warm breath tickling his skin. "I want you to forget about everything else and just focus on me and this moment."
San's throat constricts as he locks eyes with Luna, who takes him back into her mouth. He can feel himself nearing the edge. "Luna, I'm not going to hold on much longer," he cautions
She bobs her head, her nose brushing against his pubic bone as she takes him fully into her mouth. The warmth of her breath sends shivers down his spine and sets off a chain reaction of panting and moaning. As she focuses on regulating her breathing and relaxing her throat, his fingers become entangled in her long hair as his hips buck involuntarily.
“Fuck,” he groans, “You are taking me deeper than before.”
Luna can sense that San is nearing his peak, with each thrust of his hips and the firm grip on her hair. She meets his gaze, and the intensity of their eye contact pushes him over the edge to his climax.
He cries out her name as he reaches his peak, and she takes it all in as she swallows every drop. She maintains her grip on him, continuing to pleasure him until it's all over. With a gentle pop, she releases him and gazes up at him with a smile. "Was that good?"
Breathless and exhausted, San sinks into his chair with a satisfied grin on his face. "That was...unbelievable," he manages to say, his voice raspy with pleasure.
Luna pulls away from him, resting on her feet as she admires him in front of her. She delicately caresses his thighs with her hands, enjoying the view. As he starts to calm down, she stands up to relieve her now aching knees. San leans forward and brings Luna onto his lap, placing his hand on the side of her neck.
San's smile radiates warmth as he gazes at Luna. She feels a soft blush rise to her cheeks at his words. "You are truly amazing, my little sunshine," he says sincerely.
"Well, I do try my best." Luna responds playfully
San laughs softly and replies, "And you succeed beyond measure." He leans in and their lips meet in a passionate kiss.
His hands slide down her body and firmly grasp her ass. He abruptly stands, causing her to let out a surprised moan that is muffled by their ongoing kiss. She instinctively wraps her legs around his waist as he carries her over to the spacious bed. They continue to kiss intensely as he places her neatly in the centre of the plush mattress, her head sinking into the fluffy pillows.
San kisses her deeply, his hands roaming over her body. His fingers trace her spine, lingering at the small of her back before sliding around to cup her ass cheeks. As they break apart to catch their breath, he swiftly removes her t-shirt and his own, while she helps by sitting up and unhooking her bra before leaning back against the bed. He trails his lips down her neck, planting kisses and playful bites along the way until he reaches her supple breasts. Taking a moment to appreciate the sight before him, he takes one nipple into his mouth and gently sucks on it, causing her to arch her back with pleasure.
“Do you feel good?” he murmurs.
Luna nods, releasing a soft moan as San's mouth travels from one nipple to the other, teasing and tasting them with his tongue. He grasps the waistband of her sweatpants and slowly pulls them down, along with her underwear, revealing her hips before tossing their discarded clothing aside without a care.
The springs of the bed squeak as he settles between her legs. He gently spreads her thighs, asking for permission with a lustful tone. She nods eagerly, her breath catching in her throat. He takes his time, kissing every inch of her inner thigh before finally reaching his desired destination.
San's thumb brushes over her wet folds, his fingers finding her most sensitive spot. Luna moans softly, arching her back as he teases and pleases her. His fingers move skilfully, in a come hither motion that sends shivers down her spine as his mouth connects with her clit.
As San expertly continues to arouse Luna, she tightly grips onto the bed sheets with one hand while the other grasps at his hair. Luna's eyes gently close as San's skilled fingers drive her towards the brink of pleasure. She lets out soft moans, powerless against the intense sensations flooding her body.
She manages to gasp a "yes, yes," as he applies more pressure with his fingers, causing Luna to cry out in pleasure as she finally reaches the edge. "Oh my god, San!" she exclaims as waves of ecstasy wash over her.
San slows his fingers as Luna's body relaxes from its intense pleasure, gently caressing her sensitive folds.
"That was amazing," she says, looking up at him with a content and sleepy smile.
He smiles down at her tenderly."And so are you," he says softly before leaning down to kiss her. “Are you tired?”
She nods slowly, letting out a small yawn. "I'm sorry!" Her expression turns apologetic.
"Don't apologise," he reassures her with a smile. "I only asked because I could see how exhausted you are, and if you wanted to save the next episode of The Sound of Magic for another time."
“Oh, I thought you wanted to carry on.” she replies, her cheeks turning pink
"I wouldn't mind continuing," he grins and kisses her forehead, "but we both had a long day. You're tired and honestly, so am I. We’ve had a good night but now I just want to cuddle and fall asleep with you."
Her smile is gentle, and her eyes hold a glint of warmth as she speaks. "Cuddling sounds like just the thing," she murmurs, almost in a whisper. "I could really use some cuddles after today."
Sans' mind immediately goes to their earlier group conversation about Luna's anxiety, Jongho catching her taking medication, and her reluctance to share about it.
“Did.. did something happen today?” he asks softly
“No.” She snuggles closer to him and confesses, "I've just been feeling distant from everyone lately."
“In what way, sunshine?” he asks, his fingers gently stroking her sweat soaked hair
“Since we arrived in LA, our time together has been solely focused on work,” she explains. “Back in Seoul, we may all have busy schedules during the day and can’t openly show affection, but at least at the end of the day and we are all at home… I can hug each of you without fear of being caught or seen.” He pulls her closer and she continues, “But here, our time together is limited to hotel rooms and there are some of you that I haven’t even seen or spoken to outside of our scheduled events. It makes me feel guilty.”
Sans gently kisses the top of Luna's head, understanding her emotions. "I had no idea it was affecting you this deeply, Luna. I am so sorry."
"Don't apologise, it's not your fault," she replies, gazing into his eyes. "It's just been a bit challenging being away from the comfort and privacy of our home in Seoul. I miss all our little rituals."
San wraps his arms around Luna, holding her tightly as he murmurs sympathetically. He wonders if this is why Jongho saw her taking medication earlier in the day. "I miss our routines too," he says, "I miss finding you in the kitchen every morning with your tea in your Tangled mug, enjoying a bowl of cereal and a plate of strawberries. And coming home to you after a long day, finding that you've cooked dinner for us all, snuggling on the couch together, seeing you make the others just as happy as you make me." He kisses her head and she giggles softly. "Your presence brings so much joy into our lives." He leans down to kiss her tenderly, savouring the feeling of their lips pressed together. Her hand moves from his chest to gently hold the side of his neck as they share this moment, sending little shivers up his spine that only she can cause.
Luna's voice is barely audible as she whispers, her fingers tracing gentle patterns on San's cheek. "Those moments are my favourite too," she says softly. "I didn't fully appreciate them at the time; I didn't realise how much they meant to me."
San's warm smile shows he understands. "Luna, trust me. We'll adjust and find our flow while we're away. It might take a bit of time, but we'll figure out what works for everyone."
"Thank you, San, for being patient and understanding with me. I know I'm asking a lot from everyone." Luna responds gratefully.
“You’re not asking for too much. We’ve all struggled the past few days not seeing you in the safety of our home. So we were always going to have a discussion to come up with a better plan for the next trip away.” he kisses her again, “But for tonight, lets get a shower and go to sleep. We have a long flight ahead of us tomorrow so you need to have a good and peaceful sleep.”
Luna's mischievous smile widens as she chuckles softly. "A shower, huh? Are you implying I smell?"
San's eyes widen. "What? No! You always smell wonderful to me. I just thought... maybe to freshen up and... oh, you're teasing me, aren't you?"
"Maybe," Luna grins, poking his chest playfully. "But seriously, a shower sounds great. My hair probably looks like I've been dragged through a hedge backwards."
San runs his fingers through her untidy hair. "Nah, more like you've been ravished by a stunningly handsome man."
Luna laughs, her melodious voice filling the room. "Handsome, huh? Normally I wouldn't let an ego like that go unchecked, but even I have to admit you are!" She teases, leaning in to give him another kiss.
San chuckles, his hands sliding down to Luna's waist. "Oh, so you're admitting I'm stunningly handsome now? I'll have to mark this day on the calendar."
Luna playfully rolls her eyes, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "Don't let it go to your head, Choi San. I've seen you with bedhead and morning breath."
"And yet, you still can't resist me," San teases, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively as he leans in closer to hover over Luna's now flushed face with his upper body
“Stop it!” she says with a giggle, giving him a playful hit on his shoulder. “So, are we still taking that shower or what? Because I am starting to feel gross and sweaty.”
“In a good way?” he grins back at her
"Wouldn't you like to know," Luna teases, sliding off the bed and stretching languidly as his eyes stay focused on her naked form. She catches San staring and smirks. "Like what you see?"
“When it is you, always!” he responds, getting off the bed and approaching Luna. He wraps his arms around her from behind, placing his chin on her shoulder. Taking in her familiar and soothing scent, he inhales deeply. "I could stand here forever," he whispers, gently kissing her neck.
Luna leans back into his embrace, relishing the feeling of his warm body against hers. "Believe me, I would love that too. But remember, we have a long flight ahead of us tomorrow," she reminds him with a sweet smile.
San chuckles softly, his breath tickling Luna's skin. "You're right about that!" He gives her a gentle kiss on the cheek before letting go of her. "Shall we get cleaned up now?"
They enter the bathroom, and San turns on the warm water, carefully adjusting the temperature to just the right level as Luna looks out towels for them. He then gestures for Luna to go in first, flashing her a charming smile. "After you, my lady."
Luna steps into the shower, savouring the sensation of warm water flowing over her skin. She glances back at San with a mischievous smile. "Don't keep me waiting," she teases.
San wastes no time and joins Luna in the shower. The steamy water envelops them, creating an intimate sanctuary where they can be together in private. Something they’ve both been craving for days.
As they stand under the spray of water, Luna reaches up to run her fingers through San's hair, causing droplets of water to cascade down his chiselled chest. She gazes up at him with a soft expression. "Thank you for always being there for me," she whispers.
San's expression softens as he gently cups her face in his hands. "I will always be here for you, Luna. Through all the ups and downs, and if you need anything, we're all here for you too. No matter what," he promises, sealing his words with a tender kiss.
A twinge of guilt bubbles up in Luna's stomach, the unpleasant kind. She can't help but feel guilty for keeping secrets from Jongho, especially after he saw her taking her bipolar medication this morning. He didn't mention it, trying to be polite and respectful, but it only made her feel even more guilty.
As they finish their shower and dry off with soft, fluffy towels, San pulls Luna into his arms again. "I want you to know that I meant what I said before. No matter what comes our way, I will always be by your side."
Luna senses a growing vulnerability within her as she looks up at San, her eyes with a hint of uncertainty. "I... I know I'm not the easiest person to deal with at times." she confesses, “I can be difficult and over dramatic.”
San's face softens even more. "You aren’t! We all have our battles and difficulties. You don't have to face them alone, Luna. You have us by your side now," he assures her.
"Thank you, San," Luna whispers, her voice barely above a whisper
Luna realised it was time to disclose her bipolar disorder to them, and she made a mental note to discuss it with Hongjoong, Seonghwa, and Yunho once they were all back home. But for now, all she wanted was to change into pjs and cuddle up in Sans' arms for some much-needed rest.
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