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american sentences for a canadian by a singaporean

I am home and the skies break open to heavier humidity.Torrents like the words you fling to tell yourself, not me, that you are good.There was someone else in your celluloids you want to see develop.You only ever asked me for photos but never took one of me. My instantly vintage affections mimic the Polaroids I take.Some consider it a precious moment and some a disposable.You direct me to take a…

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#78218062024 (haunted.)

Haunted by all the ghosts of her past, back in the land where it all begin, she takes on the characteristic of the haunt. She takes all the shards of conversation where the other end of the line is a dial-tone going, “not you, not you, not you” . She learns to hang up instead instead of closing her fist around it. The palms are bloody and so are her ears, dripping with hope for change to now just…

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the bolter

In order to explain your nickname, we first have to look at its origin. Let’s delve into the etymology of the word “smite”. Smite, as we known commonly, is to strike. You were either struck or you strike, and the victors would tell you that the difference between an ordinary punch in the gut and a smiting, is that you did not aim to just deal a heavy blow, but to absolutely devastate. When you…

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my boy only breaks his favourite toys

I don’t like that my heart is at the end of a yo-yo string and the other end is attached to your finger. This had taught me a new way to define “toying” and yet lately it has become my favourite game. I watch you toss my heart absent-mindedly. It goes back and forth but without the consistency of a pendulum, sometimes with the speed of a pinball machine and sometimes a slow waltz. Given that…

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love or my life (loml)

Pick your path they say, indicating there could only be one. One choice, one turn. Should you choose to go right, you have to be prepared to say goodbye to everything on the left. You will not see the spring blooms in May if you go south, but you will get to see the snow blossom over icy peaks. If you want to witness the penguin march in the South, you have to bid farewell to the polar bears in…

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enough.

The dictionary definition for “enough” goes as such – “as much or as many as required.” Based on that, the opposite must be to fall short, to not measure up, but what about spilling over? What about being more than what is required? Why should excess have to apologise for being more? “Everything in moderation” is a fucking lie – everyone takes on too much to make up for the too little. You are…

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eldest daughter

An eldest daughter is familiar with ladders. Each wobbly rung an ascension to the next impossible standard. She would tear them down and fashion them into stilts, stepping on it to get to the top. For she has to, doesnt she? Who will notice her at the bottom? An eldest daughter is to blame for everything that has gone wrong. She was so well behaved she convinced her mother child-rearing is easy,…

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The Ways I Wish (Hope) I'm Loved

To have my name uttered in a room when I’m not there and have someone jump to my defense. To be a passing thought at a supermarket, when your fingers trawl through the snack aisle. To have a line I have uttered casually vex you only on your worst days, especially on those days. To have something I have done crawl under your skin, an itch you cannot scratch til the next time you see me. To have me…

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#78305122022 (rose)

What is romance but a lover’s dream? What is romance if not the softest of gestures coupled with the most razor sharp of observations? Hey, I’ve noticed, two sugars in your black coffee right? Your bubble tea order that hasn’t changed since high school. Ah but hush now, we shall not speak. We shall perform the smallest of gestures, such as cutting the sandwiches for your lunch bag just right,…

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#78420102022

There are some words in the history of the English language that are stronger than “I love you”. Don’t believe me? Dangle a foot of the edge of everything you love. I dare you now, do it. Alright, turn around to the face you have uttered those words to, foot still in the air. Look at them when they tell you, they are sorry and in a breath, extinguished every ounce of joy in your body. “I will…

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My Love Life As A Taylor Swift Playlist

My Love Life As A Taylor Swift Playlist

So for this year, instead of reflecting on my entire life up to this point as I usually do, I’m going to join in the festivities and write about love instead. Yes, romantic love. Yes the sort of thing that drives people up the wall and do crazy things in the name of it. Yes I like to think I have experienced it. Yes, this isn’t my first time writing about them. I grew up with Taylor’s music, so…

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Raey's 2020 in GIFs

Raey’s 2020 in GIFs

I started this post and never finished it, which is kinda the trend these days for the things I have been doing. Anyhoo, for future Raey’s sake, I shall finish this so she can look back at her 2020 and be like, “ah this!” or “fuck that”. MARCH: APRIL: MAY: JUNE: AUGUST: SEPTEMBER: And so I ended things. You deserved better, truly. OCTOBER: NOVEMBER: I’m not sure why I do this but I…

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christmas eve.

I want to tell you the story without being a part of it. I want to tell you this story, so that you can call it that story, and maybe it could just be a story. A fraction of fiction, a chip off the truth, an absolute derivation of my imagination. I want to tell you I wasn’t there at the other end of the phone. I want to tell you I didn’t drink my tears and how alcohol doesn’t taste the same…

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#78528102020

summer soirees / fall flings / winter whatevers summer suicide / autumn anxiety / winter waste summer scrabble / fall fights / winter walkouts

I refuse / I surrender / I leave You soothed / You healed / You left They came / They fought / They left wine stains / whiskey spills / wolfram scars shoot film / shoot spells / shoot me bruised hearts / boxed moments / battered pride

okay / okay / okay no /

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Chapter IV

This is the chapter where the heroine starts to learn a few things.

That it is not necessarily the checkered past that she is drawn to. I mean, could you blame her? How can anyone resist a good story? You hear the boy with the shaggy hair talk about the friends he’s lost. You recall the story of the girl in the window, peering in. How she wasn’t aware that it was about to all come crashing.…

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2020(26)

Usually when this time of year rolls around, I put myself through a strict evaluation process of how much (or little) I have grown as a person. And for the first time in my entire existence, due to overwhelming evidence, I have definitely grown in the past year. For better or worse, I am seeing myself clearer, as well as the person I want to be. I am making strides in my career, significant ones…

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Recap (Ramblings) of 2019

This is the part where I sit down and write about my year and my decade. This is the part where I am reflective, where I am quiet, where I am grateful. 

I am, but I am also on the subway so I can only do two out of three for now. Okay maybe just one. I am laughing a little bit to myself now, because I am on a version of a train and i am about to describe another: train of thought. Ha fucking…