skyeevelyn

[skyeevelyn]

progression of my relationship based on haikus i wrote a progression from oldest to most recent.

my worst quality;

flirty personality.

don’t mean to lead them on.

-

i am so stupid

fall in love with a senior?

yeah sophomore you wish.

-

he might be the one?

although he likes the outdoors

kinda concerning

-

drove me home last night

broke down in his yellow jeep.

he gives perfect hugs.

-

literally i’m blind

‘parently the guy i like

has liked me for months

-

it’s always been him!

he’s always been there, through it all.

his patience i admire.

- 

WE KISSED IN HIS CAR

IT WAS FUCKING AWESOME WOW

i need him right now

-

i am now his girl

he asked me out in the sqaure

just like the movies.

-

he is just the best.

deals with my emotions/stress

hope i don’t scare him.

-

I want to be there

for him, always, whenever.

unconditional.

-

God he cut his hair

might need time to recover.

oh my gosh its short.

-

figured out our shit

power couple defeats strife

he’s so fucking hot!

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

(for my Jackson)

[skyeevelyn]

room (a haiku)

my own Frankenstein

this creation is my fault;

welcome to the mess.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

Quarantine (iambic bitch)

i feel so trapped at five am, it’s weird.

‘cause i’ve never felt trapped at this late time.

but now that staying up is now my norm

i guess it sorta has reason and rhyme.

you see i’m getting restless and hungry

i’m craving something that i cannot eat.

i need attention, need a person’s touch

but sadly everyone is now asleep.

so here i sit alone in my bedroom

typing bad poetry for no one’s eyes

hoping that someone will reach out and grab-

but at this point i’m feeding myself lies.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

4 am

i feel so high

at 4 am

the treetops linger near.

i become scared

at 4 am

i am consumed with fear.

-

my eyes will droop

the lights will dim

and i know that i won’t

want to get up

the next morning

i’ll lay around and mope.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

Frog!

oh to be a frog!

to be but a damp piece of fat

hopping and flopping...

eating flies, mostly.

oh, to be a frog!

and have no worries 

(most of the time)

able to hop from danger,

with no reason else to stay.

oh to be a frog...

the only toxic-relationship

may be another frog-toad friend

who has literal poison skin.

oh. to be a frog.

to not feel anxiety about your own opinions

‘cause your only opinions are

hop

swim

leap

eat.

never having to question yourself more than twice.

never having

borderline depressive

mood 

swings.

oh. to be. just. a frog.

lily-pads and soothing streams.

with nothing in between

i dream of quite a simple life

where one could finally enjoy

simple joys.

Oh, to be a frog.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

Growing up and ditching dreams

kids will always believe what adults tell them

like magic and fairies and shit like that’ s real

and lying is bad, and that they can do

anything they put their mind to.

when i was a child i always believed

that lying was bad, and i could do anything

i put my mind to. That’s where it began:

the false sense of comfort in who i am.

so i got my hopes up. and i started to dream

i reached for the stars and i started to scream

cause they felt so close, they felt so real

they felt so... attainable at the time.

but kids grow up. and now i am here.

and stars fall apart, crumble, disappear.

and my future’s so close, yet i am so far

from that kid that i one knew.

i’m not her anymore.

saying goodbye to ones dreams,

finally putting to rest her crazy ideologies

realizing you never cared about it truly, just the comfort that it brought.

i’d rather be unsure and ready

than confident and not.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

Knit Hats (a haiku!)

beanies are the best!

I use them to cover up...

insecurities!

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

I Love You (for me and for you) 2:14 am

i love you.

and while I love all of you,

completely, every inch,

inside and out

i not only love you for who you are

but for who i am

when i’m with you

i love you.

and while i love all you’ve created,

completely, every action you’ve taken

for you and your life,

i not only love what you have made of yourself

but what you have made

of me

my darling, i love you,

for the fool that you are

and the fact

that you can extract

a silly weak foolish part of me.

my dear, i love you

for when you can let yourself reveal your

vulnerable you

and that you can create

a space

for me to be vulnerable too.

my love, you impress me

that through your perfection

who you are,

what you’ve made,

your foolishness and shame,

you look down at a reckless fool like me

and work to make me better,

make me good;

without a word; without a touch.

you simply do it by being yourself.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin

[skyeevelyn]

Lonely Nights, 4:37 am

Missing you.

Never having had you...

The way I’ve yearned for, at least.

Missing your leg

That I might press mine against.

Wearing socks to bed.

Wrapping blankets

Tighter and tighter around my body

Turning the electric blanket heat

From 5 to H

Needing your warmth.

Missing your arms

That should be wrapped around me

Feeling with my hands and feet and torso

The emptiness.

The gaping hole, though my bed is small

It feels as if it could never be filled.

Missing your chest

That I need my head to be resting on,

Because this pillow may be

Soft

But it does not compare to me resting

My ear to your heart,

Listening, carefully,

For the most important creature’s

Heartbeat.

This stuffed lion can not replace

The need for me to hold you.

I press myself against this body pillow.

It does not return my embrace like you!

It cannot love,

It cannot give,

I cry out in desperation

For it is not you.

Though,

It does catch my tears.

Absorbing into its fibers,

As if your knit tee catches mine

Though, you will never catch my tears

Of loneliness.

That job alone

Belongs to my isolated twin sized partner.

Skye Evelyn Hodgkin