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A love like that was a serious illness, an illness from which you never entirely recover -Charles Bukowski

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Everytime I close my eyes..it’s like a dark paradise

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“ I wanted to crawl into his chest and kiss everything that he thought I’d hate “

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“please come in”

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“Maybe Hannibal can help you resolve these issues. He is very good.”

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Fireflies live very brief lives. Better to live true to yourself for an instant than never know it.

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What Is Love Without Tragedy

I know there are more profound tragedies

Than that of love

But I also believe

Physical and mental or emotional tragedy

Can sometimes be of equal effect to physical tragedy

Sometimes there is no better or worse tragedy

It depends on the effect it has on the affected

Our love

It was tragic

It is tragic

Reminds me of Casablanca

I will always love him

For the rest of my life

I will never recover

True love is not of this world

Or a thing that can ever truly be rejected once infected

It just is

The weakening of it

Surely it is a thing to overcome

For there is much work to be done

But my love for him

It is not a thing to be fought

It is not a thing that can be fought...

                     -What Is Love Without Tragedy-                                                                                         GBADURA

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“she is literally teasing the devil… she’s playing with fire, and she knows that, and she gets off on it.” - anderson, gillian.

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And I was truly ready to give it all up for you

I had

I had packed my bags

Ready

Ready to be with you against the world

But I could not go alone

You were not ready

You were never ready

Trapped by religion and moral uprightness

Trapped by culture and right and wrong

Trapped by yourself

A cub can roar

A cb is not a lion

How do you teach fearlessness

How do I teach love after showing the deepest love

How do I show you that love is everything

Tell me how

Love is not for the faint-hearted

I am still in mourning

Till I can no longer be in mourning

I will never lie to myself

I love myself

I have to be in pain

To get over pain

                  -The Mourning The Healing-                                                                                          GBADURA

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“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.

Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches (via books-n-quotes)

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The Prayer

I am scared that I will meet you again

And I will still want you as bad as I still want you now

I am scared that nobody I ever meet will compare to you

I am sacred I may never have this connection again

I am scared that I even think this way

I am scared of the connection we had

I am scared of the connection we have

I am scared of this power you have always had over me

I am sacred that we may meet again

We always have ever since we were kids

Our souls keep bringing us back together

But we can always never be together

And nobody can ever answer that question why

I remember when we lived in the same town all that time and did not even know

Did not meet till we met again

Again

Years 

Months

Time passes

Growth happens

And we always get right back to each other

Every time

You became so part of my life

Even though we weren't always together

I do not even know how to have a life that you cannot be part of

I do not know how to be with you not part of my life

I do not know a life without you in it__

_____

You left a scar that I guess will always remind me of you

But

Please universe please end this soon

I need this permanent scar surgically removed

I need a healing

I need to be sanctified

Please end this now

Please give me strength

I never ever want to meet him again

I am sacred of this pain he has given me so freely

Nobody has ever hurt me this badly

Destroyed my sanity so easily

I am scared of all the foolish decisions I am capable of making

If I meet him again

I am scared that I cannot trust my heart around him

My soul

My body

I am scared

I never ever want to see him ever again

I want to be over him

I guess I have to try or just let it be

Please if there is a God

I pray I never ever meet him again

I pray he leaves me alone

I pray our paths never ever cross again

I pray I let him go completely

I pray I have a life without him in it

I pray I can see him and have no feelings even if it happens

I pray with all my heart and my soul

I pray I never see him again

He has almost destroyed me

Our love like poison

But he will not win

He will not

I refuse to let you

Yes you

I refuse to...

                                     -The Prayer-                                                                                                                GBADURA

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We Were Right At The Wrong Time

I remember when He told me

You are my soulmate

And I laughed and said

I do not understand you

I do not believe in soulmates

Nobody is indispensable

If one exists

Then there can be two or more

Humanbeings are dispensable

___

Well I guess now

I am eating my own words

And laughing at my own self

____

Because I met You

____

And now I believe

You were my soulmate

You are my soulmate

But we were not the lucky ones

I do not regret you

I do not regret us

If anything

I am grateful

We happened

You showed me something

Something I never thought I was capable of

Something I never thought I possessed

Something I did not fully believe in

Unconditional love

You showed me what I was capable of

You showed me

I have met many in my short lifetime

But you__

Nobody wishes you more good than I wish you

Nobody wishes you more love

If you love something you have to let it go

Maybe it is true

We were so perfect with each other

We were so bad for each other

For I can fight anyone for you

I can fight anything to keep you

But I cannot fight you

I cannot force you

I love you too much

And I care about you

I wish you the best

I will always love you

But I am now letting you go

I am no longer in pain

                    -We were right at the wrong time-                                                                                        GBADURA

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..Mr Lecter

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