smirk-mode

[smirk-mode]

Lister: Guys, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really really ugly. Rimmer, on the bottom bunk: Oh, smeg off!

[smirk-mode]

in the Boys from the Dwarf group chat

Rimmer: First one to reply is gat. Rimmer: *gay Rimmer: Wait...

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: No, this is not a mess. You know what I consider a mess? Lister: Your life? Rimmer: I- well yes, but-

[smirk-mode]

Lister: There's nothing worse than people using big words they don't understand. Rimmer: I photosynthesize with this.

[smirk-mode]

Dear, please let me know if you receive my message.

I'm sorry, But today I need you more than ever, please don't ignore us. my children cry a lot from hunger.💔😭 Can you donate to buy us one kilo of flour which costs $50?

The internet is very weak. I hope to see your donation when the internet is connected again so that my children can be happy. May God bless you. 🙏

signal boost

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.

[smirk-mode]

Cat: I’m 80% awesome 20% water and 100% handsome. Rimmer: That’s 200%. Cat: I’m twice the man you’ll ever be.

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: You know me, Listy, I don’t take any smeg. You know what I say to my haters? Lister: What? Rimmer: I say: “Please don’t hate me, I’m really nice.”

[smirk-mode]

Lister: What’s your biggest fear? Rimmer: I am incredibly arachnophobic. Lister, under his breath: You don’t want spiders to get married?

[smirk-mode]

Lister: Let's just agree to both say we're sorry on the count of three. Lister: One... two... three. Rimmer: ... Lister: ... Lister: See, now I'm just disappointed in both of us.

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: Know why I called you in here? Lister: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic. Rimmer: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?

[smirk-mode]

Rodon: We have a feral army! Lister: We have a Shitey Sprite!

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: I have been tricked, I have been backstabbed, and I have quite possibly been bamboozled.

[smirk-mode]

[smirk-mode]

Lister: I love hearing Rimmer shouting at someone else. It makes such a nice change

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: You’re drunk. Lister: Correction: drinking. Present tense. Grammar, Rimmer.

[smirk-mode]

Rimmer: Why are you drinking? Lister: I drink when I'm depressed. Rimmer: But you're always drinking? Lister: *smug grin*