smirkesfourteen - Tumblr blog

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octobert 30th alex reveals that the audio was not martin but himself, having once again bought every microphone in the city

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the horrors are returning everyone!!!! clap if you’re excited for the horrors

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alexander j newell you are my sworn enemy

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2 magnus 2 archives

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we are fucking under attack.

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My post got 1 like… So here it is. Jonathan Sims from The Magnus Archives reading “Man Door Hand Hook Car Door” like a statement. See you all again in like 3 years. Edit: this kind of blew up and I’ve noticed a lot of people aren’t seeing the OG post. So for clarification: This is a text-to-speech bot I trained

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@webtable bonus naomi

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annabelle cane drinking a peach white claw and smoking a joint through a 1920’s cigarette holder

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i’m like if gregor samsa was a girl <3

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if you have trypophobia stay inside tonight because me and my girls are hitting the streets and we got

got holes in our bodys like a cheese

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alternate universe where Dracula explicitly comes clean about being vampire in a letter to Jonathan and how he doesn’t want to lie to him anymore. I’m thinking it could begin like hello jon apologies f

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Met Gala needs cooler themes like:

Fromsoft Games

Furries

Early Era Tumblr

Smirke's 14 Fears

Pet sims

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I don’t think we talk enough about how funny mag 92 is

The episode starts. With Elias calling the police like he’s ordering a pizza. He then reads a letter from his dead ex-boyfriend and casually mentions he keeps his bones in his office. (Why. Why would you do this.) Then he says some spooky shit about how Jon Should See People As Disposable, Actually. Jon comes in having the WORST DAY OF HIS FUCKING LIFE. He almost got fucking killed TWICE and then was immediately dragged to help his would-be murderer kill his boss. He tries to use the powers he only recently realized he had on Elias, only for Elias to be weirdly horny about it. Melanie is here. She only MARGINALLY knows what’s happening. Martin has to confront that the police are murderers for the first time. Tim is already going through it. Elias confesses to two murders. He gives basira a job but make it spooky. Then he gives Jon some vague as shit answers and says something along the lines of Being Human Is Overrated before sending him on a wild goose chase around the world to stop the evil mannequins from doing a puppet show. What part of that isn’t hilarious

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concept: magnus daily, in which you get sent all the statements in real time as they happen, over the course of 303 years