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had a shower to relax and just argued with myself in my head the whole time 😊💕

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Children have no awareness of the stigma/implications of nudity and will 100% walk in on their parent showering to tell them about the super cool unicorn power or whatever that they just thought of because they also have no patience.

Home is where you never have to explain why you are currently naked.

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“What do you mean the tower is gone? Are you sure you’re in the right place? I actually used more colorful words than that,” Brett Elmore recounted to NBC News. “He said there’s wires all over the ground and the tower is gone.”

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I hate having to post political posts like this nut he we are again. Anybody from the UK wanna sign this. Folks from outside the UK maybe share it?

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It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

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i am some sort of fey creature and my cat is the human who i have arbitrarily decided is my favorite human.

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A concept: The Avengers notice that aside from Tony’s sleep-deprivation episodes, he’s actually a pretty calm dude. Even in the face of incredible danger on the battle field, he’s cool as a cucumber, calculated, almost seems like he’s disassociated from the situation with how at ease he sounds. So they decide to try to freak Tony out. His has a pretty high threshold for weird so it’s actually pretty difficult.

Natasha details a mission where things went horribly wrong and there had been blood everywhere and even she admits that once she’d stumbled out of the room, actually slipping on the amount of blood and falling with a splat in it, that she’d fallen to her knees and puked until she was dry-heaving. “Neat,” Tony says around a mouthful of sandwich. Natasha stares at him silently and hopes she doesn’t look as horrified as she feels.

Bruce tells Tony some of the worst things he saw in poverty stricken areas while he was on the run–child prostitutes, human trafficking, the poor dying of starvation as the rich nearby lived to excess including throwing out food that could have fed the hungry. “Okay,” Tony says very seriously. “So where should I focus my resources first?” “What,” Bruce stutters, and then awkwardly tells him where he’d seen those things so he could start fixing those problems.

Thor regales Tony with tales of battles fought and wars won at great cost. Gruesome details are not spared. He goes into great detail about one of his brothers in arms getting his leg torn off and then being beaten to death with it. Thor probably would have won the competition had he not gone off on a tangent about Loki and how he’d once disguised himself as a snake and then stabbed him. “That doesn’t actually sound that weird, considering some of the things I’ve heard siblings doing to each other,” Tony says, crunching on some chips. “How many times did you fall for that?” Thor is very disappointed with him even as he says, “Only thrice.”

Bucky tells Tony all about the torture he endured, how much he hated the chair and the pain it brought, how foggy it made him for days. When Tony just gives him sad eyes he continues on to tell him the worst part was the cryo, how cold it was, how waking up was so painful. Tony just gives him sadder eyes and then Bucky finds that any room he steps into goes up ten degrees and he has to tell JARVIS to cut it out because he runs hot and he hates waking up in bed soaked in his own sweat.

Steve gives explicit play-by-plays of what he saw during the war–the POWs he rescued along with Bucky, the concentration camps, the occupied towns they’d liberated. He describes haunted eyes and bodies that look like skeletons and the terrified faces of children. “I heard all of these stories from Howard,” Tony points out after staring at him awkwardly. Steve nearly hits the roof. “HOW THE FUCK COULD HE KNOW WHEN HE WASN’T EVEN THERE WHAT THE FUCK DID HE DO JUST CANVASS ALL OF EUROPE FOR PEOPLE THAT MET ME.” “I mean… yeah?” “WhatthefuckHoward!”

Clint recalls Budapest. Tony nods along. “Sounds like a bad vacation.” “It wasn’t a vacation, Tony.” “The last time I took a vacation I was dying and a guy with electrical whips who hated my dad tried to kill me.” Clint raises his hands. “Okay you win.”

Pepper hears about the competition and just says, “Carpeted kitchen.” “Okay, what the FUCK–” Tony begins after he’s shivered and muttered a distraught little ‘why.’ Pepper gives the Avengers a very disappointed stare. Why would they ever think that Tony could be freaked out by blood or violence after all he’s seen? She should tell them about the time she’d mentioned her aunt having a carpeted bathroom.

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North East Basement 2 <<Previous          Next>> (coming soon)

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You can literally make anything and anyone problematic if you try hard enough seriously give me people and things and I’ll make them all “problematic” right now.

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which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?

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me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

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had another idea!!

fic where the chain goes to twilight’s world and see him frantically trying to find his little brother until it’s revealed that this is actually Not his world and he’s looking for the link of that time (wild)

Okay ngl i love this so much. This would make an amazing fic. I may write this sometime!

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new fave video

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people who learned about greek mythology due reasons that DONT involve having read percy jackson at 12 freak me out, like what the FUCK was going on in your life that you found out that zeus turned into a pigeon to woo his wife like HOW