sole-supernova-sophont

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Uh oh! You are now a were-animal! This means you become a human-sized animal hybrid with uncontrollable bloodlust every night!

Spin this wheel to get your species

[sole-supernova-sophont]

rambling again abt sensationalization of cults because this comes up whenever i discuss the fact that I was raised in one, but... like many other forms of abuse, i think there ends up being a popularly conveyed idea of an "outside world" where there's going to be unambiguous freedom. and don't get me wrong, being outside a cult or any other abusive environment is way better than being inside one, but you get outside and if you have eyes you notice the ways that society is abusive and coercive. you notice the ways your personhood gets curtailed by things by school & work & government. the idea of the cult being a sensational, unique outlier is at best a comforting lie told by people who don't want to notice parallels, and at worst, I can't help but see it as an intentional scapegoating of cults and of abusers to distance broader society from being implicated in having caused similar harm. don't fall for it. a cult is an intensifier of patterns that already exist. abuse is an intensifier of patterns that already exist. it is absolutely not unique lol!

[sole-supernova-sophont]

i think the thing i wish christians that come across my posts knew the most is that when i'm talking about harmful doctrine, 99.9% of the time i'm processing the harm of this specific doctrine. i'm not having a conversation about theology or alternate interpretations or talking about this in a theoretical philosophical way. i'm talking about actual beliefs i grew up with and the actual harm that they've done. i don't benefit from theological conversations about interpretations because i don't hold any belief in christianity at all, haven't for years, and have absolutely no intention of returning. i especially do not hold the belief of the harmful doctrine i'm talking about.

it is... disrespectful and/or derailing the conversation to tell me it's incorrect (irrelevant, i'm talking about harm caused by this belief, not whether it's correct or not), to tell me to just forget it and focus on the "right" interpretation (dismissive and irrelevant to the post AND me, someone no longer involved in christianity with no interest in changing that), to ridicule me about how i could have possibly believed this (i was raised with no outside perspectives and no way to access them so i had no way to determine they were wrong), to insist i'm lying (9/10 times there are many people in the notes confirming they had the same exact experience), to tell me you've never seen anything like this ever in your entire life (i'm glad you can't relate, i still experienced it), to diminish the harm it caused (you don't get to decide what hurt me), to try to convince me to stop talking about it (why are you more concerned about me bringing light about harm in your communities than the actual harm in your communities?), to tell me that isn't real christianity so my trauma doesn't count (would you tell me that the abuse i sustained from my partner "doesn't count" because "that's not how a real partner treats their spouse?"), or just generally dismissing my experience for whatever reason.

i hold grace for the fact that a lot of these people are coming across my posts in the wild and often don't have any other context of me and my experience and that a lot of people are trying to help. but it doesn't make the experience itself less rude or disruptive to me.

i'm not saying these conversations don't have their place. these can be really valuable intra-community discussions; but i am not part of said community. i would 10000x prefer for every christian that comments something about how their interpretation is the right one on my posts to find a christian that actually holds the belief i'm referencing and talk to them about it instead. that is an actual way you can promote change and help people. i personally do not benefit from these conversations but talking to people with harmful beliefs about healthier interpretations can stop them from harming people in the present or plant a seed for change later. that can help people who are being harmed right now or prevent people from being harmed in the future. if my posts stir something in you and you feel the pull to help i am begging you to put your efforts toward helping people who are actively being harmed by said beliefs. they're not as rare as you think and a lot more people than you think are being harmed by them. they are not going to listen to me, known apostate, about it... but they might listen to you, a fellow christian.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

god forbid you be traumatized by your religion and have the gall to talk about it. because—okay, it’s not like people treat other kinds of trauma much better, but at least if you’re talking about your trauma from, like, poverty or abuse or something, you’re a little less likely to butt up against the sorts of topics that people stake their whole identities on.

whereas if you have the fucking gall to talk about your religious trauma, even if you’re very polite and restrained about it, even if you’re a good victim and just try to talk very straightforwardly about what happened to you without going out of your way to try to assign blame or anything—people will crawl out of the woodwork like fucking weevils champing at the bit to tell you how wrong you are. normal people, people who (nominally) believe in believing victims, people who would not act this way under other circumstances. no, it’s not like that. no, you must have misunderstood. you’re stupid, bitter, a liar, naive—how dare you try to insult to their truth, their faith, their way of life, their god.

you can say simply and honestly, the church hurt me. this is how. and you will simply get swarms of people going UM ACTUALLY THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN AND IF IT DID IT WAS YOUR FAULT. YOU JUST DON���T UNDERSTAND THE THEOLOGY. YOU’RE DISTORTING AN ENTIRE RELIGION BASED ON ONE BAD EXPERIENCE. YOU’RE A BIGOT, ACTUALLY. like if posting about your experience with child abuse got you a wave of people going UM MY PARENTS DIDN’T DO THAT SO YOU MUST BE LYING. ALSO IT’S MISOGYNY TO ACCUSE YOUR MOM OF ABUSE. no compassion. no validation for the victim’s experiences. no examination of what enabled the abuse, or what currents of it carry on into your community. no space to breathe.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Waiting

[sole-supernova-sophont]

“Stop isolating yourself from reality” well tell reality to stop sucking

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Here’s possibly the most coherent animation we’ve ever made! And ofc it’s of Whim :3 We’ve wanted to visualize Whimsical’s walking method since kinda forever, the way weight’s distributed on three legs and how the tail has almost retained being another one (The </•\’s ancestors had four legs, so the tail is an extremely vestigular example of like, backward centaurism)

Obviously there’s a lot of little imperfections still, but yk, I’ve been poking at every line of this for weeks now & really I’ve just gotta slap “complete” on it b4 I get too perfectionistic. I think it turned out great though ^^

—🔦

[sole-supernova-sophont]

— VEILIC ATTRACTION

[pt: veilic attraction]

a nonhuman attraction towards humans that can only be understood from the standpoint of a nonhuman, with themes of fascination and curiosity. a love for humans beyond human understanding.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

i think when people talk about dsm diagnoses being 'destigmatised' it's usually the case that what they mean is the public perception of the diagnosis name (depression, anxiety, etc) has become associated with minor, temporary, or resolvable forms of distress. the experience of being so depressed you cannot get out of bed, or brush your teeth, or work -- that experience and those behaviours have never been 'destigmatised,' only associated with other diagnostic labels in certain discourses seeking to present 'depression' as treatable or minor. it's basically a semantic nosological shift, rather than any actual 'destigmatisation' of the behaviours psychiatry exists to pathologise -- widening (minimising) the diagnosis, then just moving any leftover 'scary' symptoms to a different diagnostic bucket. it's a rhetorical shell game that does not challenge, but exists symbiotically with, the ableism that causes behaviours like "not being able to get out of bed" to be stigmatised in the first place.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

I've always had a fascination with naval mines since childhood watching finding nemo and playing feeding frenzy like for real isn't he so fucking handsome

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Fun Thing about our experience with DID is that some of us just Do Not feel pain for some reason. which uh. can result in... moments like this

[sole-supernova-sophont]

I mean this in the nicest possible way,

I give 0 shits about the opinion that Christians have of me.

Not only have I heard it all before, I also just don’t aspire to meet their religious standards because *wait for it* I don’t subscribe to their religion.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

[sole-supernova-sophont]

HOWL FOR ME.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

cant wait until winter #eternalnight

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Three years back, I created 13 alternate accounts on Discord and inserted them into my friend group over the course of a few months, pretending each of them was a new person. They have their own personality and typing / grammar distinctions, and their own fake life events and stories that I've had to keep meticulous track of. Some of them even engaged romantically with real people, though none in the present day. Nowadays the original friend group is split up, with some fake people being present in about each server that still has some kind of connection to the former group. One active group chat even has six alts and one real person. I literally have to keep this up like a puppetmaster because these pretend people have real, important connections to people I still care about. It's hard but I literally don't know how to resolve or change the situation without causing a wave of dispair and destruction in one way or another.

.

[sole-supernova-sophont]

Working on something experimental, wanted to try my hand at more realistic anatomy than I usually go for in 3D

No idea how far along I'll get in the process before I lose interest/motivation