sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry - Tumblr blog

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

Alone in this room silence ringing in your ears hands out to feel something anything

the doors swing open empty rooms staring at you a dim exit sign above a locked door screaming at you to leave

corridors stretch mockingly

palliative care mental health wards

but the building is empty the lights are out

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

Memories of a scouting childhood long forgotten

knots, poorly tied enough to hold a body.

rope, skipping rope she searched and could only find. Books

piled up for unsteady feet clouded by pain and cheap vodka

but she couldn't it hurt her chin

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

sobbing quietly a lifetime of learned silence

knowing showing would cause others pain or fatherly pats on the shoulder and orders to stop

so you hide and wish you knew how to share

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

I don't think I have a soul may I borrow yours?

I'll give it back, I promise

I just want to know what it feels like

to smile

not teeth, but happiness they say it's warm, like a blanket a loving hug in your brain

but I don't have that

I've never had that

so may I? just for a moment

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

Memories run down your fingers Dripping they always say it should hurt I liked that jumper but it grounds you, granting release I'm going to have to clean that to the thoughts trapped in your head

until they come again

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

It flaps its wings and flies away the bird of grey and blue from where it perched you almost thought it might have liked you too.

But birds will not make their nests where you or I might lay for birds are birds despite all hope and so they cannot stay.

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

callous accidentally yet with full purpose humanity seems so disgusting

they try and touch you with their baby sounds a child disdain

you feel awful that you could think this do this

yet you don't stop

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

plans

not good ones but plans

yet

as always

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

You apologise. For existing.

Not out loud of course, then they'd hear you

and they like you they enjoy spending time with you.

Words easily said, but hardly meant.

you stay quiet

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

again

you did it AGAIN

you knew this would happen

why do you talk to them

I don't care if you'll be lonely

you keep hurting them

and you don't change

leave them alone

stop doing this to people

oh now YOU cry

how dare you

you did this

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

She stands there, dancing,

Singing the music.

Showing off a collection

of memories and loves.

I cannot tell her what I think,

just smile and wistfully watch.

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

I cannot write long, my brain shall not go far. I think myself these simple thoughts My mind is oft' ajar.

[sophies-awfully-quite-bad-poetry]

The traveler dons their walking cloak, and leaves to roam the land.

Their friends they sat and not one spoke, but wept into their hands.