spaghettihorrordonut

[spaghettihorrordonut]

Yeah, the doctors ran some blood work and discovered I was actually the Thing all along. No, I don't know if my insurance will cover it

[spaghettihorrordonut]

okay i lied put your clothes back on we're not having sex i'm fundamentally evil and i need you to kill me

[spaghettihorrordonut]

you're so beautifol :) may i sense you with my feelers

[spaghettihorrordonut]

I think donut should be doing devastating things to the gay ecosystem. think he should be causing all kinds of crises without even leaving the hoiuse

[spaghettihorrordonut]

youre invited to a baby shower and the banner reads "its a worms"

[spaghettihorrordonut]

Me: *stubs my toe* "AH FUCK!"

Mass of quivering flesh that's been growing in my cabinet and slowly feeding off my suffering until it develops sentience: *takes first breath*

[spaghettihorrordonut]

amending my completely accurate and canon-compliant fallout floater design to include the little barbels (?) on the front

[spaghettihorrordonut]

Fourth time now I've tried to propose to my wife and has gone horribly wrong first I put the engagement ring in the wine glass she drank that next time I tried putting it in the cake she ate that at the last point I decided to give it to the waiter to give to her she still ate him too like I've lost so much money but God what a woman

[spaghettihorrordonut]

why aren't there more stories where cannibalism is a metaphor for something

[spaghettihorrordonut]

[spaghettihorrordonut]

inside me there are two lungs. and one liver. one stomach. a few meters of intestine. there's a lot inside me actually

[spaghettihorrordonut]

getting murdered but it's so traumatic i repress the memory and only actually die years later during hypnotherapy

[spaghettihorrordonut]

avghd donut isn't a "shapeshifter" in any fantastical sense of the idea. he's slow. he's gross. he's made of flesh and bone and cartilage and blood and he's basically just as human as anyone when he's "put together." he has to grow anything new if he wants it. he has to eat to make up that deficit. he has to learn how to do anything he wants to do with his body.

He's a shapeshifter in the same way a caterpillar or an octopus or, say, a slime mold is. He grows outwards, he reabsorbs the vestigial, he bleeds when he goes too fast and splits the skin, he's rendering himself into caterpillar-mush in order to do anything ground-up, he's falling apart at the seams if he wants to be fast about it and he's losing way more mass than he would if he took it slow if he does it like that. He can't get "smaller" without actually just performing mitosis (though, he doesn't really have to separate off independent "sentient" matter - but he can.)

Rules make the games fun bc you have to think of creative solutions. then they piss me the fuck off even ough i made the rules because sometimes i just like want to think about big freaky monster donut chewing on men, and i don't want to thgink about where the fuck he got the mass, OKAY. he has a stash or something. just a cocoon-like mass he keeps somewhere like the horrible little beast he is so he can menace doc (and others) post-fic without needing to do murder for it okay. i need this

[spaghettihorrordonut]

you stick your fingers in my cage... my pitch black cage. you feel something cold and wet...you retract your fingers and to your horror you realize i painted your nails! :) i hope you like them

[spaghettihorrordonut]

imagine how much more fucked up the history of the world would be if eating someone's brains reliably conferred on you their memory and knowledge

[spaghettihorrordonut]

has thou ever watched bones and all

Uh, nope! I've heard of it in passing mostly. I have watched a few things; Killing Eve, The Thing, Jennifer's Body, Akira, and god knows how many YA horror novels we read as a teen, lol.

[spaghettihorrordonut]

donut? his ass gonna be eating ppl like they’re krispy cream glazed donuts

his actual bodycount isnt even that bad all things considered. hey did you know most murderers kill people they already know