speedy-johnson

[speedy-johnson]

Hot Shit | Tom Cardy

[speedy-johnson]

When the Harry Potter HBO series comes out, I better not be seeing any of the bullshit justifications that you guys used to justify your Hogwarts Legacy purchases.

"Oh, she won't be making any money from it!" She's the executive producer.

"There's no ethical consumption under capitalism anyway!" That excuse applies when you're talking about things that humans actually need, like food. That excuse does not apply when you're talking about a TV show.

"I have to support the creators!" No you don't. No you fucking don't. If that excuse was true, you'd have to consume every piece of media that was ever created. Besides, Warner Brothers is a billion-dollar corporation. You won't hurt their feelings if you boycott one TV show.

"But it was my childhood!" I don't care. I legitimately do not care.

I don't wanna go through this bullshit again. Just don't fucking watch the series. It's that simple.

[speedy-johnson]

Reminder that it's not only good but morally correct to pirate Nintendo games

[speedy-johnson]

[speedy-johnson]

google search what do they put in sports bras that make them hot as fuck

[speedy-johnson]

BORN TO FORGET

WORLD IS A BLUR

I Am Memory Issues Man

410,757,864,530 FORGOTTEN PRECIOUS MEMORIES

[speedy-johnson]

apparently people are now purchasing thick water to make slimes with because of a trend on tiktok

thick water is for disabled people who can’t swallow properly. stores usually have extremely limited supplies of it.

please don’t buy thick water for fun or to make slime with. it’s literally the only way some disabled people can drink anything. It’s not a fucking toy

[speedy-johnson]

I am told that the headlines really undersell how rad my tattoo is. I agree.

[speedy-johnson]

[Image description below]. It feels good to spread my wings! Are you surprised I’m actually an alien? Growing up neurodivergent, I felt a lot like an alien much of the time. Many in the LGBTQ community do as well, as human ideas of gender & relationships don’t always fit us.

Neurodivergent people are much more likely to be trans, and vice versa. We experience the world differently—gender is just one (big) aspect of that. And that’s okay. In fact, it’s wonderful! It’s good to unmask where and when we can 🩵

[Begin image description:

Caroussel of five slides, including a four-panel comic and a list of supporters.

The title of the comic is “Alien Enby”

Slide 1: a non-binary trans woman named Riri with orange hair and a light blue dress stands in a sassy pose. Riri says “since I started making these comics, people have asked me: “why is it called Alienby comics? That’s because…”

Slide 2: Riri says “I’m an alien.” Riri is standing in a similar pose but has now transformed into a retro space alien, with light blue skin, antennae, and a pink space suit.

Slide 3: Riri is seen in a flashback as a masculine presenting preteen, in alien form with light blue skin wearing a t-shirt, nervously covering their antennae and looking over their shoulder. There are silhouettes of other children behind them. The voice over continues: “I spent years trying to look and talk like a normal human, but the antennae became too hard to hide.”

Slide 4: Riri is seen as their future alien self, with thick electrical cables coiled around them. With an expression of determination they try to plug these cables into each other. Riri’s voice over: “My brain seems to be hardwired differently.” Riri is also shown in another image flaunting a pair of sparkly fairy-like wings. Voice over: “And body metamorphosis is part of my life cycle… but my differences are beautiful.”

Slide 5: a list of supporters on Patreon and Kofi. Thank you to my supporters!

End of Image description]

[speedy-johnson]

One time I ate probably way too many mushrooms and I could feel my trip going bad. So, I turned to my roommate and I said something along the lines of,

"I feel amazing but I feel like this sensation has a price and I'm about to pay it."

To which he responded, "What are you, catholic?" And that knocked me so firmly out of my mental state that the rest of the trip was hands down the best time I ever did mushrooms.

[speedy-johnson]

soon may the wellerman come, your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

[speedy-johnson]

Kindergarteners will be so proud of themselves for being able to draw a triangle. My GPU can draw tens of thousands of those in a second. You are not special.

[speedy-johnson]

idk who Jasmine is but she really went off with that rice

[speedy-johnson]

ROMANTIC MERCENARY: I'll kill anyone... for the right woman

KINDHEARTED BANDIT: cough up yer coin! if you've any to spare that is. I know times are tough. I'm here for you

GNOMISH NEW YORKER: oh my god they hit the twin mushrooms. oh my god its gnine gneleven

[speedy-johnson]

[speedy-johnson]

[speedy-johnson]

thanks steam