friend: oh my mom doesnt let us bring drinks or food outside of the kitchen
me: my momma said i gotta come home right now immediately
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the worst!!! thing!!! is having certain names POISONED for you……every time you hear That Name your gut twists and you feel sick and unsettled or angry
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tumblr mobile can’t load images but it sure can load battlecamp ads pretty quick
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I hope one day someone comes into my work and appreciates the art I've created on my name tag
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what if instead of censoring our words with **** we used ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
example: son of a ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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i just heard a bouncing noise and then that was followed by my dad saying
“oh no my potato”
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*cumming after sexting*
You: got more pics? ;P
Me: read ✅
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LOOK AT ALL THE PEOPLE I CAN TRUST
*points to mirror*
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Jurassic Parks and Recreation
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BIRD JUMPED ON THE KEYBOARD
AN d
WHERE AR ETHE MANNERS
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*walks up to newborn baby* haha fuckin virgin
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me
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