spooky-frog

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I hope Hank doesn’t find out about my meth business lmao

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First thing he did when we moved into the new place was figure out how to open the closet door and grin devilishly

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my best friend scares me sometimes we were just walking in a grocery store and she went "the aliens have arrived" GIRL?

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he's going through a hair dye phase (sleeping in a berry patch)

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people

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my favorite thing is to say "investing in" instead of "buying"

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we're running out of time to fuck it we ball....

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that comment about how you should not borrow grief from the future has saved me multiple times from spiraling into an inescapable state of anxiety. like every time i find myself thinking about how something in the future could go wrong i remember that comment and i think to myself: well i never know, it might get better. it might not even happen the way i think it will and if it does happen and it is sad and bad ill be sad about it then, when it happens. and it’s somehow soo freeing

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shes chillingggg dudeee

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me: oh my sauce is missing sometjing. help

garlic:

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hes jumping

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i respect people who want to keep their menstruation to themselves but i have to make it everyone's problem. Literally if it was socially acceptable to lead every conversation with "I'm menstruating" i would.