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[spotsandsocks]

EVAN BUCKLEY | The man was too stunned to speak.

[spotsandsocks]

Upper West Side // Central Park // 4.26.24

@spotsandsocks @steadfastsaturnsrings @elvensorceress @monsterrae1

[spotsandsocks]

An au where Eddie gets cursed, turns into a cat and Buck takes care of him until they find a way to break the curse.

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stuck now so long, we just got the start wrong

aka rival firefighters 🚒 | buddie | chapter 2/10 | Explicit

Eddie’s just finished helping load up the last patient into the 118’s ambulance, Wilson already in the front with the engine running and ready to go, and Han in the back, settling in beside their patient, when Buckley finds him again.

“Diaz! Are you a match? Because you ignite a fire within me.” Buck says, stupid cocky smile in place.

“Are you a smoke detector? Because you’re really loud and annoying.” Eddie shoots back, way too mentally worn out from triage to go another round with Buckley.

A loud laugh rips out of Wilson, echoing through the cabin while Han laughs so hard he almost chokes on his gum. Once Han’s recovered, he wipes his eyes, looking at Buckley and wheezing out, “Oh my god you can’t be serious?”

Eddie uses the question as his chance to slip away and make his way back to his own team. Only for Buckley to call out to him not even seconds later.

“Hey, Diaz!”

So close. He was so close.

He comes to a stop but doesn’t turn around, not wanting to give Buckley the satisfaction or whatever.

“I hate it when you go! But I love to watch you leave!”

Eddie shakes his head and can’t control the huff of a laugh that breaks free. This guy really is something else. Eddie doesn’t even bother with giving him the finger or retaliating, just continues walking until he’s back with the 136.

Read Chapter Two on AO3

[spotsandsocks]

I don't want to write fic that's "good", I want to write a fic that hits someone's id so hard it changes their brain chemistry.

[spotsandsocks]

Reblogging would be a great help, but don’t feel pressured to

[spotsandsocks]

honestly really sexy of tumblr to keep follower numbers private. how many people are following me? you'll never know unless I tell you. maybe it's a million, or a thousand, or five, or maybe it's just you. maybe you're the only one here, all by yourself, unable to see if there's anyone standing next to you.

and you'd never know, because status here is based on opinion and not numbers; how popular you think someone is is a vibes-only calculation, and besides the chronological algorithms-optional feed, it's genuinely the best thing tumblr's ever done.

[spotsandsocks]

FUCK IT FRIDAY!!

Tagged by @tizniz @shipperqueen6 @thekristen999 thank you 💜💜💜

putting the F in our Friday again as for reasons (aka @stagefoureddiediaz ) I was reminded of this so in my eternal battle to bring 911 fans into the dragonhold or weyr I offer art and smut to start the weekend from to To Fly The Skies 60K

The gap between them makes him ache, it feels too wide after what they just shared. Buck slides closer, slowly because he feels oddly shy right now. Eddie continues to smile softly and reaches out to take his hand, fingers brushing his knuckles in a gentle caress. It makes his heart flutter, Buck’s eyes drop and focus of the slow movement, his heart is beating faster.

“I’m glad you’re home.” Buck’s voice is soft and quiet, he lifts his eyes to meet Eddie’s and ends up caught there, just looking at him, wondering how this happened to him. How he got to have this man. 

“Me too” Eddie matches his quiet tone not looking away.

“And we’re good now?” Buck checks, biting on his lower lip nervously. Eddie lifts the hand not holding onto Buck and frees his lip from the anxious nibbling, “you’ll hurt yourself like that” he mummers, thumb now running gently across the reddened skin, Buck lets his mouth relax, his breath quickening at the look in Eddie’s eyes.

“Yes we’re good,” he starts to push Buck backwards  “and we have some time before Chris will be back. If you can think of anything we could do?” His eyes crinkle as he says it and Buck’s hit with a wave of love and affection, it’s coming from both of them, flowing freely in both directions.

Buck laughs, as Eddie pushes him lower, he lets himself be pressed flat onto the bed, “cool, did you want to get some chores done” he smirks at the look he gets “cos I kinda need to tidy up round here.”

“Shut up” Eddie tells him fondly, as he leans further forward, hands on either side of Buck’s head, swinging his leg over so he can straddle Buck.

Buck likes the direction this is going “You going to make me?” he challenges teasingly.

”Maybe” Eddie’s voice is deep and holds a promise Buck is very interested in investigating. He can’t help notice how the muscles of Eddie’s arms flex as he gets slowly closer controlling his decent carefully until he’s lying flat on top of him, their  bodies pressed together. Buck shudders at the relief it brings, Eddie’s a steady reassuring weight holding him down, enveloping him, with their chests pressed together like this their hearts are aligned, beating so closely to each other. He feels a little dizzy at the thought as he lifts his head up, silently asking to be kissed.  Eddie obliges, dipping down to close the tiny gap left between them, taking Buck’s lips softly with his own, moving them slowly over Buck’s. He teases and pulls at the sensitive flesh gently until Buck’s moaning softly, moving with him. Eventually Eddie pulls away lightly nipping at Buck’s now swollen lip. He sits up moving his weight in just the right way to make Buck groan louder and move his hips in response.

Eddie looks flushed, his eyes bright in the dim room but he chuckles. “You have missed me huh, if a little kiss can get you all worked up like this.” Buck attempts an outraged glare because he says it as if Buck can’t see how hard Eddie is too, as if he isn’t sitting there with a wicked smile as he rocks his hips gently, moving against Buck sending little jolts of pleasure through them both.

Then Eddie rubs against him harder and Buck arches up stifling another moan he manages to say “want me to show you how much I missed you?”

Eddie keeps up the steady rhythm and Buck’s needy whine finally slips out.

“Oh I can tell baby” Eddie sounds extremely pleased by the fact and by the way Buck suddenly gasps out his name.

“Tell me more” he says his voice becoming rougher, letting his own need start to show. Buck knows how much Eddie likes it when he talks in bed, what it does to him. He’s happy to oblige.

“That first night I was so cold without you,” Eddie leans back down to start work on Buck’s jaw and neck, it makes it harder to concentrate but Buck makes the effort, “couldn’t sleep, wanted you to keep me warm.” Eddie hums next to his skin asking for more.

“Missed you arms, your hands” his breath stutters as Eddie’s mouth makes contact with his chest, clever fingers having unbuttoned his shirt without him noticing. Eddie runs his fingers over muscle and sucks marks onto his body then soothes them with kisses. Buck arches up with breathless gasps that pushes his hips forward.  He’s stopped talking so Eddie prompts him “what else did you think or” he hums against his skin, runs the flat of his tongue over Buck’s nipple “do while I was gone?”

Buck gathers himself and continues “Thought about you, things you’d do to me if you were there. Thought about this, your mouth all over me” Eddie grazes his teeth over Buck’s nipple making him hiss in pleasure. “Yeah like that, made me hard Eddie just thinking about you. Wanted to touch myself” 

Eddie sounds cool and collected when he asks “Did you?”

“Tried to be good and wait but I couldn’t, felt so good, not as good as your hand, still wished it was you”

He’s aching now dick trapped in his trousers straining for release.

“Show me” Eddie pulls away, and Buck can see he’s not calm at all, he’s flushed and his eyes look almost black, his desire clear in his heated gaze.

Now Buck’s got room to move, he misses Eddie’s warmth but he makes quick work of his clothes. Eddie’s still dressed, sitting next to him, his eyes burning as he watches Buck revel more and more skin until there nothing left to remove, Eddie takes a deep breath, “Shards you’re so ….” His hand traces across his body, chest, stomach, sliding his hand past his hips to linger over the strength in his thighs, his hand roams freely but he doesn’t touch the one place Buck wants him too. 

Eddie’s watching him intently eyes dark and hooded. “Show me” he asks again then comes back to press soft bites into the flesh of his neck up to his ear, making Buck whimper, he whispers  “don’t rush baby take your time.”

Buck’s eyelids flutter shut, his hands traces the outline of his cock, he lets his fingers drift lightly up and down, he’s only starting to tease himself. He can hear the hitch in Eddie’s breathing and opens his eyes to see him staring down the length of his body, he’s transfixed by the sight of Buck’s hand sliding up and down. Buck wants to push them both a little further.

“I touched myself like this, thinking about you, wishing it was you.” He lets his grip get firmer he wants a little more, he moans at the feeling and at the thought that Eddie’s watching, enjoying what he sees, getting harder. He can feel him against his leg, a firm solid line, he smiles when he starts to move, rubbing himself against Buck’s thigh. He’s trying to be quiet but he’s not doing very well. Eddie shifts slightly Buck doesn’t realise where his hands have gone until he feels a finger slide between his legs to circle slowly around his entrance, 

“Did you touch yourself here too? Imagine me here?” 

He had but he can’t say it because Eddie fingers have pushed in a little and taken his words away.

“Buck?

He’s panting now, feeling a little desperate “yeah yeah I did, didn’t feel like this, more, please.” The last word comes out as a desperate moan. Eddie gives him more, pushing in again but only a little, teasing him more than anything until Buck’s a shivering mess within a few minutes.

Eddie’s voice pulls him out of the wave of sensations “I wasn’t planning on fucking you Buck, was planning on riding you, make you come like that but now I can’t choose.” Buck can only gasp, Eddie has two fingers in him and it’s not enough,

“both we could do both” he stutters out. Eddie laughs, “so greedy” he kisses him and slides his fingers out, keeps a little pressure there so Buck twitches trying to get them back.

“No, you look so good, sound so needy, I think I’ll fuck you” he sounds so casual, like they’re discussing what to have for breakfast and he’s not driving Buck out of his mind. Buck’s nods to show he’s on board, he can’t talk because Eddie’s other hand is in his mouth fingers sliding in and out. Buck’s playing with them with his tongue, moaning around their thickness thinking about Eddie’s cock in his mouth instead. “You look so ready for it baby, is that what you wanted while I was gone, my cock in you making you come?

Fuck it was, and it sounded even better now it was Eddie suggesting it while his fingers are dipping back in stretching  him, when Eddie lets his fingers slide from Buck’s mouth over his throat and rests his hand above his heart, Buck quickly makes it clear what he wants. 

“Please Eddie can we, will you? I want it.”

Eddie moves, grabs the salve they use for just these occasions and with one quick pull brings Buck to the edge of the bed leans over for more kisses as unbuttons himself, uses the salve with more teasing fingers and then lines himself up, bending Buck’s knees, and slowly so slowly pushes in. The long slow slide makes them both moan and Buck’s hands grasp at the covers of the bed.

Eddie keeps his pace slow, enjoying Buck’s increasingly frantic noises, his words of encouragement to go harder, faster, he doesn’t listen, trying to make this last. Buck’s hands seek and find his own cock and start to move around it, firm hard strokes, he doesn’t want to wait any longer, with each stroke he sounds even wilder, until it’s too much temptation for Eddie and he does what he Buck’s begging him to do, increases the pace and is rewarded in a few moments with increasingly frantic moans.

”yeah Eddie just like that,” he’s panting and gasping, getting so close “harder, there, yeah, that’s it I’m so close, he lets out a strangled whimper “ yeah, there ah, you’re gonna make me come, yes” he can hear his own ragged breathing as the words peeter out and become a long high gasp as he comes with a bone deep shudder. Eddie watches wide eyes tracing the evidence of Buck’s pleasure spread out all over his chest and with only a few more thrusts joins him with his own soundless gasp.

Once their heartbeats settles they rearrange themselves. Eddie pulls Buck in close, kisses him starting between his birthmark and the thread score that’s healing.

Buck mummers “welcome home” and Eddie smiles into the kisses he’s leaving against Buck’s face.

It is very good to be back.

@monsterrae1 @shortsighted-owl @the-likesofus @hoodie-buck @loserdiaz

@buffaluff @bi-buckrights @fiona-fififi @rogerzsteven @hippolotamus

@bidisasterevankinard @exhuastedpigeon @wikiangela @underwaterninja13 @stagefoureddiediaz

@thewolvesof1998 @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming @jesuisici33 @eddiebabygirldiaz

@daffi-990 @diazsdimples @honestlydarkprincess @elvensorceress @steadfastsaturnsrings

@weewootruck @giddyupbuck @rainbow-nerdss @lover-of-mine @fortheloveofbuddie

@watchyourbuck @loveyouanyway @saybiwithme @bewilderedbuckley @ronordmann

[spotsandsocks]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @tizniz @diazsdimples @wikiangela @hippolotamus @bi-buckrights @exhuastedpigeon Thank you lovelies 💖

How many works do you have on ao3?

89 that’s not too shabby is it. Three years of writing this summer.

What's your total ao3 word count?

902,255 that is quite a few words isn’t it.

What fandoms do you write for?

911

Top five fics by kudos:

If You Break It 3.2k Chris overhears a something and gets upset, then he tells Buck who gets upset too.

They say the Truth will set you free 2.3K Buck get a dose of something at work and gets emotional and chatty

Could Have Should Have Would Have 3.2k an unexpected“I love you” but it’s too late. Isn’t it?

Just Ask 1.7K Eddie's having thoughts, he wants to touch. Buck's ok with that, all Eddie has to do is ask.

Looking from the outside 2.4K TWhat happens when everyone you meet thinks you’re married to your perfectly platonic best friend. Most of these are quite old now, I think I’ve written some just as good or even better but fics don’t seem to get as much kudos these days

Do you respond to comments?

yes everyone is really important to me

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

No fics really end angsty round here but this one’s pretty emotional along the way.

Alone With Your Thoughts Buck gets very badly hurt (for plot reasons) and trying hard to stay alive he realises he’s not as alone as he thought.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

See above! All happy can’t choose the happiest.

Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet- think I’m too small to get noticed maybe!

Do you write smut?

Um yes I certainly do 😏 and quite well I like to think 😉 in fact an example will be popping along in FIF shortly

Craziest crossover:

Nope - now AUs is a different story

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of! Can’t imagine anyone noticing my fics enough to steal them

Have you ever had a fic translate

Someone asked to once but who knows!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope

All time favourite ship?

Gotta be buddie hasnt it. They just inspire me

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

All of my wips languish right now and are crying out for attention but I fully intend to finish them all. I do!

What are your writing strengths?

Not sure?! I think my more canon style fics are quite consistent with the characters in the show. Think that I’m pretty good with a complicated plot but you tell me?? I like the way I can wrap a bit of humor around the more tense bits too.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Long sentences? An over enthusiasm for the comma? Too long? Poor tagging?

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Maybe controversial but I’m not a huge fan of eddie using Spanish terms of endearment in fics. If he ever does it in show I’ll feel better about it, but it doesn’t actually feel very him, apart from that I don’t mind

First fandom you wrote in?

911

Favourite fic you've written?

How can I chose!! But these old chestnuts I’ve gone on about before but I, very proud of them actually

The Lost and The Found werewolf/shifter au

Good Knight Sweet Prince Prince/knight au

Tied To You From The Start smutty paranormal shenanigans

And obviously dragonriders au… see FIF post shortly

Thanks for tags you lovely lovely people you’re all so so talented I adore you you make my days so much brighter ☀️💜☀️

@rogerzsteven @hoodie-buck @thekristen999 @loserdiaz @weewootruck

@shipperqueen6 @stagefoureddiediaz @underwaterninja13 @steadfastsaturnsrings @daffi-990

@bidisasterevankinard @bekkachaos @elvensorceress @rainbow-nerdss @honestlydarkprincess

@saybiwithme @loveyouanyway @lover-of-mine @watchyourbuck @jesuisici33

@monsterrae1 @eddiebabygirldiaz @shortsighted-owl @fiona-fififi @the-likesofus

[spotsandsocks]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Not gonna lie, I've been really struggling to write since I wrote my last fic. It kind of feels like all of my writing beans left me when I posted it, but this lil game makes me really want to write.

How many works do you have on ao3? 155 (holy shit????)

What's your total ao3 word count? 682,114

What fandoms do you write for? Currently? Mostly 9-1-1, but occasionally Teen Wolf stuff

Top five fics by kudos: 1. Queer Robins Club 5246 kudos DC | Mature | 4.9k words

2. Dustin's Dad(s) 3783 kudos Steddie | Teen | 5.2k words

3. give me a sign, I want you next to me 2528 kudos Buddie | Teen | 7k words

4. let me see them tan lines 2399 kudos Buddie | Teen | 2.8k words

5. On the Ropes 2349 kudos Sterek | Teen | 5.4k words

Do you respond to comments? Yes! I try to respond to every comment!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? With a Whimper probably. It's also the only first person POV fic I've ever written lol.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Basically all of my fics have happy/hopeful endings? Maybe there ain't no turning back?

Do you get hate on fics? I have before but not recently!

Do you write smut? I do :)

Craziest crossover: Back Alley Deals is a crossover between Batman and Teen Wolf where Stiles goes to Gotham and ends up hooking up with Jason Todd.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yeah a couple times in the Sterek fandom! I don't found out because some friends found them.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! A few of them have been. I'm always open to translations.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! There was a Jaytim WIP exchange last year that I took part in.

All time favourite ship? I can't pick one? Either Sterek or Buddie probably.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Right now it feels like all of them, but probably my fic affectionately titled The Repression Symphony where I go through the movements of a symphony and dive into Eddie's religious trauma.

What are your writing strengths? I think dialogue and descriptions probably.

What are your writing weaknesses? Endings are hard!

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? I don't really do it because I only speak English I don't want to use google translate to write it.

First fandom you wrote in? Harry Potter

Favourite fic you've written? I can't pick one!!!

give your heart and soul to charity Teen | 12.5k | Buddie Eddie finally address his Catholic trauma and guilt.

lay your cards down, down, down Mature | 6.3k | Buddie Buck and Eddie wake up married in Vegas

there ain't no turning back Explicit | 28.3k | Buddie Buddie healing road trip, my beloved

every road and every highway led me right back to your door Teen | 2.5k | Sterek A woman gives Derek a baby and then turns to mist, he calls Stiles.

it hurts to hope for more Mature | 15.6k | Buddie Buck experiences a major non-romantic heartbreak and is forced to look at his life in a new way.

Tagged by @honestlydarkprincess @devirnis @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples @wikiangela

@jesuiscenseedormir @cal-daisies-and-briars @bi-buckrights @neverevan

No pressure tagging @rosieposiepuddingnpie @inell @sunshinediaz @spagheddiediaz @jeeyuns

@elvensorceress @watchyourbuck @shitouttabuck @thekristen999 @thewolvesof1998

@acountrygirlsfun @actualalligator @tizniz @rainbow-nerdss @eddiebabygirldiaz

@generatorcat @glaciya @withmyteeth @loserdiaz @monsterrae1

@spotsandsocks @underwaterninja13 @steadfastsaturnsrings @jesuisici33

and anyone else who wants to share!

[spotsandsocks]

Fuck it Friday

Tagged by @dangerpronebuddie

"I think so. Jack, he's a firefighter who just moved here from Seattle. Nice guy, a little sad but nice."

"You going to ask him out?" Conrad couldn't help but ask.

Billie burst out laughing, she laughed so hard tears rolled down her face. "Hell no. Besides he's into someone else and so am I."

Conrad looked at her strangely again. "Okay."

Don't worry you're still my number two guy." Billie smiled over at the man who made her heart melt.

"Excuse me. Who pulled out in front of me?" Conrad mock glared at her.

She giggled. "Trevor you goof. My son."

"Fine I will let that stand." Conrad teased.

NP tagging: @honestlydarkprincess @hippolotamus @spotsandsocks @dr-lizortecho @ksbbb @impalachick @monsterrae1 @loserdiaz and anyone else who wants to 🩵

[spotsandsocks]

Sending sunflowers to bring some joy to your inbox and dash!!

I hope you have a wonderful day and a great weekend 💜💜💜

They have brought great joy! Beautiful I love them - so pretty

Thank you hope your weekend is wonderful too 💜💜💜

Sending some daisies back 🩷🩷🩷

[spotsandsocks]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by the lovely @hippolotamus thank you my friend 💕

How many works do you have on ao3?

Just 12! I started writing almost a year and a half ago and I am very slow lmao

What's your total ao3 word count?

204,888

What fandoms do you write for?

Just 9-1-1! Honestly haven't felt the urge to write for any others.

Top five fics by kudos:

Bottled Poetry

Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light)

You and Me Here (underneath the mistletoe)

Home is Just Another Word for You

Kiss Me Before it's Over (If Only for a Minute)

Do you respond to comments?

Yes!! Comments make my day so I love responding to them! Although I am very far behind...

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I have to have write happy endings so I can't really answer this 😂

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Also difficult to answer since they are all happy endings... but I think that Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light) has the most rewarding happy ending after all the angst I put them through 😅

Do you get hate on fics?

Mehh I've gotten a few somewhat rude comments but thankfully nothing notable

Do you write smut?

I dabble... particularly in my FWB baseball au 😏 and my upcoming pirate au 😌

Craziest crossover:

I don't foresee myself writing any crossovers asdkfjh

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of...

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so, but I would be honored if someone wanted to translate one of my fics!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No, my writing schedule is too unpredictable and I feel so bad if someone is relying on me 😭

All time favourite ship?

Buddie!! Obviously. But I have been loving Bucktommy, and Destiel will always have my heart.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't know if my beloved wedding fic will ever return to from the war... Different first meeting, Buck and Eddie reunite at Madney's wedding.

What are your writing strengths?

Umm. uh. pass? I honestly dont know adsfkjh but I like writing multichapter fics and weaving the different parts of the story together (idk if I'm any good at it though lmaooo)

What are your writing weaknesses?

Actually writing... asdfkjlh

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I've never added it but I know if I ever needed to include it for any reason I know I could consult my lovely spanish speaking friends <333

First fandom you wrote in?

9-1-1!

Favorite fic you've written?

ohhh not to be repetitive about this fic but probably Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light), my army marriage of convenience au which is very personal and special to me ❤️

Tagging @monsterrae1 @prettyboybuckley @rogerzsteven @loserdiaz @saybiwithme

@spotsandsocks @eddiebabygirldiaz @hoodie-buck @exhuastedpigeon @bidisasterevankinard

@bekkachaos @loveyouanyway @elvensorceress @spaceprincessem

[spotsandsocks]

—just a little something i wrote a few weeks ago to go with episode 7x4 🫶🏼

rated: g | words: 2.3k | read on ao3

summary:

A heavy sigh fell past his lips as Buck let his head fall into his hands where he was rested over his island. He’d never meant to hurt Eddie, and he felt awful about it. All he’d wanted was to get the guys attention. He’d gone about it completely the wrong way though; he hadn’t needed Maddie to tell him for Buck to realize that.

It was just that—well he was jealous. Of what though, he wasn’t sure.

—or—

After his lunch with Maddie, Buck goes to see Eddie. Feelings realizations ensue.

tagging squad below, just lmk if you wanna be added or removed <3

tags: tags: @loserdiaz @redlightsandicedtea @loveyourownsmiilee @monsterrae1 @bi-buckrights @swiftiebuckleyhan @honestlydarkprincess @queerbuckleys @spotsandsocks @justsmilestuffhappens @bibuckbuckley @djdangerlove @eddiebabygirldiaz @elvensorceress @jacksadventuresinwriting @stanningsky @wh0re-behavi0r @ronordmann @spaceprincessem @transbuck @giddyupbuck @wildlife4life @betty-boom @hippolotamus @thewolvesof1998 @watchyourbuck @underwaterninja13 @pirrusstuff @nmcggg @theotherbuckley @louis-tenn @the-gayest-wug @buckley-diaz-rules @muppetbuddie @gamer-kai @blorbodiaz @saybiwithme @trashbaget @steadfastsaturnsrings @bibuckbuckgoose @wikiangela @hobbitnarwhal @shortsighted-owl @pirrusstuff @goldencherrymooon @kinardbuckley @daffi-990 @greenfairrryy @mattsire

[spotsandsocks]

Fuck it Friday-- Repost

Like others, I started reminiscing about fandom around the time of the shooting and decided to re-share my story:

Trying Hard to Remember, Trying Hard To Forget

This is thorough, painful examination of the healing process using the dichotomy of Eddie not remembering the shooting while every second was burned into Buck's memory. It's a brutal look at the slog-fest of injury recovery and emotional trauma.

Snippet:

The last bandage covered most of Eddie’s right side and Buck stood there studying it, his breathing a little harsher, his fingers trembling until he shook his hand to still them. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Eddie said, leaning his left hand against the edge of the sink. He’d have to sit down soon, but he needed to see this through.

Taking a deep breath, Buck removed the tape, revealing an eight-inch line of staples running from below Eddie’s armpit to the back of his shoulder.

Eddie bit his lips, looking at them, imagining what the ER doctors had to do, swallowing against the sudden feeling of awed horror. “I was told the surgeon only broke one rib during the procedure. They managed just to spread the others without causing additional fractures.”

Buck swallowed, his voice low. “To repair the lung?”

“Bullet nicked the upper left lobe after it damaged the thoracoacromial artery going in.” Eddie swallowed, looking at Buck in the mirror, suddenly understanding what the chaos of the scene had to be like, knowing the procedures that had to be performed to save him. “You must have gotten to the ER like in….”

“Four minutes,” Buck said with a shuddery breath. “We got there in four minutes.”

Eddie swallowed, because it hit him now, how close it’d really been, how even a minute or two later and it would have probably been too late. He’d had a hemopneumothorax and suffered a great deal of blood loss. Or that was what the doctor told him. Because anytime Eddie tried to think back to it all….

He stared at his reflection, at all the healing wounds.

“Thank you, Buck.” It sounded so damn inadequate to Eddie’s ears.

“There’s nothing to thank me for.”

Eddie stared at Buck in the mirror, at the sincerity in his eyes, the rawness there making Eddie’s heart pound. “I’m here because of you.”

..

tagging those who might be interested or have words to share:

@exhuastedpigeon @hippolotamus @diazsdimples @dangerpronebuddie

@cafecitoeddie @elvensorceress @elenaazra @homerforsure

@mellaithwen @spotsandsocks @operationbigskye @deedo2313

@the-likesofus @spaceprincessem @thebestbooksaround

@eddiebabygirldiaz @epicbuddieficrecs @shyaudacity @andavs

[spotsandsocks]

The person I reblogged this from is awesome as fuck.

[spotsandsocks]

OLIVER COMMENTING ON A BUDDIE INSPIRED TATTOO??? (x) 🥹🥹🥹