spottytheturtle

[spottytheturtle]

I'm really glad you're here, and I'm really glad I'm here too. life is in no way easy, but as time goes by I'm finding it to be more and more worth the effort

[spottytheturtle]

putting my hand up during sex to ask a clarifying question about the order you just gave me

[spottytheturtle]

God damn that's an absolute insane reading pace. Also on point for the Guide, so kudos to ErraticErrstica for that

i have finished a practical guide to evil. 3 million words in 18 days, which is so fucking normal of me. anyway i'm a hollowed-out wreck of a person and i can't stop smiling

[spottytheturtle]

Another absolutely incredible interaction, there's so many of these that I looked over in my initial read through, I can't wait to pick through them over the summer.

“What Lord Black was to you,” she said. “You were to me.”

My face flickered in surprise.

“Not a mentor,” she growled, but the irritation petered out. “The offered hand, I mean. If I hadn’t become your legate I’d be a junior officer in someone else’s legion right now. I never thanked you for that.”

“Don’t,” I said. “I wouldn’t have gotten this far without you, Juniper. Stings to admit it, but it’s true.”

“Wouldn’t be the same without you either,” she said. “It’s not about the rank, Catherine. The rank is just what gets me there. I want…”

There was something burning in my general then that I’d never seen in her before. I’d seen her cold and amused and furious and irritated more times than I could count. I’d even seen her tender, though only with Aisha.

“More,” she said, sounding angry at the inadequacy of the word. “Three Hills, Marchford even Arcadia. No one’s fought like that before. We get to make that. They’ll study our battles, centuries from now. Some other girl stuck herding godsdamned aurochs will think about our mistakes, how she could have outsmarted our opponents.”

“Making history,” I mused.

She laughed.

“Fuck history,” she said. “We’re changing the face of war. And it’s just beginning, Catherine. The storm ahead will make this all look like drizzle.”

Ahead was Dormer, the full might of Summer and the Queen that ruled it. But she thought beyond that, and so did I. The Diabolist had carved doom out of stone and sorcery, and she would not quietly into the night. And on the horizon, Procer sharpened its blades. In a year or ten, the Principate would come calling and with the greatest army on the face of Calernia. There would be heroes in that host, and not like the ones I’d killed. The real legends, the heroes weren’t bound to small stories like mine. The Calamities were the greatest monsters of the age, but they’d lived so long because they kept their wars small and their enemies distracted. One day the great Named of the other side would come forward and the old wars would be born again. Those that warped the lands, flattened mountains and burned cities. I’d have to be ready for them, for the people who wanted to make my home the battlefield of the continent again. If I could not have peace in truth, then I would settle for the peace of the grave.

It was the kind of victory I’d been trained for.

“I don’t think,” I said quietly, “that we’ll be remembered fondly. Not you, and certainly not me.”

“Ah,” Juniper of the Red Shields smiled. “But they will remember us.”

A Practical Guide to Evil - Chapter 39

[spottytheturtle]

Alas, someone must saddle my goat

Kairos Theodosian, inspired by Leyendecker.

More of that PGTE art I haven’t posted here yet!

As a side note, EE did give me permission to sell my PGTE fanart as prints. Let me know in the tags if you’re interested!

[spottytheturtle]

This part of the series is such an interesting introspection into both the foundational ideals that pretty much everything Catherine does is based on, while also serving as a reflection of the people and issues we experience in the real world. These permeations of the fourth wall are few and far between, as they should be to not break the immersion of the series, but that just means each one hits that much harder.

please read a practical guide to evil

[spottytheturtle]

catherine foundling remains absolutely iconic

incredible banter doesn’t make or break a story, but it really feels like the cherry on top

[spottytheturtle]

Not the trans support we wanted, but the trans support we needed <3

remembering the time i drunkenly told a stranger i was a trans man and he started going off about alpha sigma and beta males and how each one was equally important no matter what anyone says and that i shouldn't feel pressured to be a strong alpha male because emotionally intelligent beta males were just as important

[spottytheturtle]

kissing women isn't a hobby it's a profession. I'm unemployed

[spottytheturtle]

I didn't understand tumblr till I saw this post. Now I understand it even less, but somehow I feel at peace here? Fuck it we ball ig

my biologically 22 year old transgender daughter, turning deep red and trying not to pop a blood vessel: H...HAAAAAAAA......RRRAAAAAAAGHHH!!!!

me, periodically glancing back over my shoulder while doing 110 down the I-95: Come on sweetheart, focus! Kids 6 and under eat free at this place and I know you can age regress 2 more years

the angel chained up in the passenger seat browsing the menu on his phone with his free hand: do u guys think these are like actual buttermilk pancakes or is it just a marketing term

[spottytheturtle]

online communities are so strange because people slip away so easily. you can be on here for years, folding people you've never met into the fabric of your daily life, and then they disappear, leaving only ghost posts scattered across tumblr behind. or their blog stays dormant, for weeks, months, years, until you're only still following them because you remember that they love sunflowers or they were kind to you when they didn't have to be or the last thing they posted was sad and raw and you still worry about them sometimes.

and sometimes they come back when you least expect it, years later, even, and there's this sudden rush of relief like there you are, there you are, even though you barely knew each other.

there's a strange kind of love to it. i don't know you and i want to hold your hand across miles and time zones and oceans. i can still see the imprint of you in this community you left. you don't anyone will notice or care when you're gone, but we notice and we care and we wish you well.

i hope you're all okay out there. i hope the sun is shining on your face and you are breathing deeply. i miss you.

[spottytheturtle]

It's me

I don't trust anyone who hasn't acknowledged their capacity for evil.

[spottytheturtle]

Huge fan of when my speech patterns rub off on people enjoy when thay happens

[spottytheturtle]

Pledging your first born to a fae, but they learn like three years later you're a massive lesbian.

fairies keep leaving ivf pamphlets on your doormat

[spottytheturtle]

Glad I'm not the only one trying to sell herself that particular idea

as soon as I'm less depressed it is OVER for you guys. I'm going to make so much cool shit. it's going to be amazing. and we're not even talking when I'm fully not depressed. when I'm just a little bit less depressed, just a tiny bit more jovial than I am right now. after that it's fucking over

[spottytheturtle]

Me when women (and pasta)

I LOVE PASTA AND I LOVE WOMEN

[spottytheturtle]

sure I could become a slut. but you see, I'm scared