starcrier

[starcrier]

I don't care how bad life gets i'm not watching Love Island

[starcrier]

can’t a woman just run a flop blog in peace?

[starcrier]

I think it would be incredibly emotionally fulfilling to hit someone in the back of the head really hard with a shovel

[starcrier]

Talking to my baby makes me feel like a video game tutorial. "You can manipulate objects in your environment by using the HAND function. Go ahead and try it now."

[starcrier]

“the heart wants what it wants”? okay well the heart is fucking stupid can we let someone else have a turn? maybe the spleen wants to have a go?

[starcrier]

Your honour, I admit that I do have a superiority complex over not watching Disney "live action" remakes, but in my defense, I am right

[starcrier]

dad who's about to sneeze: I think I'll scream when I do it

[starcrier]

I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in. I just need to lock in.

[starcrier]

so much of life is needing to pee. enough already

[starcrier]

[starcrier]

Friendly reminder that you're not required to publicly take sides in any geopolitical conflict you don't understand.

[starcrier]

New medieval peasant cultural exchange post. Medieval peasant shows you the real night sky and you light on fire and explode.

[starcrier]

"What do you want from a remake" I DON'T WANT THEM. I DON'T WANT ANOTHER SOULLESS NOSTALGIA-FILLED CASH-GRAB. I DON'T WANT ANY OF THEM. I DON'T WANT ADAPTATIONS THAT KILL THE ORIGINAL MESSAGE OF THE THING THEY WERE BASED UPON NEITHER THE SHOT-BY-SHOT DESATURATED RECREATIONS. I WANT ORIGINAL STORIES!!! NOT REMAKES OF MOVIES THAT AIN'T EVEN 30 YEARS OLD!!!​AAGGGGGHHH

[starcrier]

honestly what the hell are you supposed to do. is my question

[starcrier]

girl who finally is going back to reading by finishing one book: now i'm going to read all the books in the world.

[starcrier]

My casino has new top-of-the-line technology to stop heists: a montage detector. If those bastards want to break in and steal my money, they’re doing it as part of one, long take