static-snz

[static-snz]

One thing I find irresistibly hot is when someone sneezes and then immediately sniffles, so quickly it's almost part of the sneeze itself. Like "aaaISSHHHuh-snfff!" It adds so much desperation to the sound, like they're trying so hard to keep the mess inside their nose, but it's so runny. 🥵

Even better when the sniffle itself triggers the need to sneeze again, so they're caught in a relentless fit, which of course makes their nose runnier and runnier, which makes them sniffle harder, which makes the itch worse, which makes them sneeze again, which... 🥺🥰

[static-snz]

you have gross perverted thoughts about me?? that's so sweet

[static-snz]

Recently been obsessed with the idea of someone sitting naked on a couch with a hanky held to their nose and their free arm slung across the back of the couch. Their head is tilted up, staring sightlessly at the ceiling with teary eyes as their nose tickles and runs, chest heaving helplessly. They hitch and sniffle and sneeze, spraying mess over and over into the hanky as it keeps getting more and more damp.

Meanwhile their partner is kneeling at their feet jerking them off.

[static-snz]

AN: 2300 words!! Ooh babey I said the sesbian lex snzfkr monsterfkr fic will show up and part 1 of ??? is here! Its kinda just the build up rn, so only horny implied, nothing explicit yet (and unfortch, a bit of exposition at the start lol) Oh my god they were roommates situation.

Context/tags: 1980s americana vibes college, but dnd races are there!! Nessa's a tiefling, Suzi's a lycan (werewolf) who's into snz stuff. I thought about a puppygirl who's manifestation of horniness is turning into a werewolf and nearly passed out, hence, this fic.

Cat and Dog Game

Nessa freaking Vahn. Of all the people she’d be now rooming with, Nessa of all people. 

Suzanne Chrysler dropped her duffel onto the bed and slid her purse off. A small change in rooming situations halfway through the year wasn’t that bad, just inconvenient, but she had been utterly gobsmacked by the person she’d been paired up with. 

Nessa, majoring in business and marketing, was a remarkably stunning person. A tiefling, from a small town over, where most of the college’s students come from. Nothing much happens here or there, but her parents had money and boy, did her personality reek of it. 

She had a sharp tongue, a certain edge to her style, her demeanor, and despite her typical disdain for class work she still had ambitions and bite. The confidence was so palpable one didn't even question if it was earned. Her hair probably weighed a tonne, always in a high ponytail with plenty of hairspray, and her nails were in a shade of pastel pink that was nothing like her saturated personality. She was also on the cheer team, something that Suzi knew based on the uniform hanging on the door hook. Of course, she’d never gone to any of the games, so…she never saw Nessa there. 

Instead, she’d catch glimpses of her in class; they shared a class — an elective for film and television. She saw now that there were a few posters over Nessa’s bed: most were what she’d expect, with A-listers and fashionably dressed couples, but a few horror flicks were up there too. 

Nessa’s bed…the floral sheets and the faint scent of perfume that lingered in the room.

She’d have to avoid thinking about it too much as she unpacked. She was alone now, but it would only be a matter of time before her new roommate would return. 

And she couldn’t think about that too much. She shouldn’t. 

Suzi had put away most of everything when Nessa had come back, looking momentarily startled that someone else was in the room. 

“Oh,” She said flatly as if recalling something meagre, “Right. I forgot you were moving in today.”

“Yeah! Hah! Well, here I am. Don’t worry I’m almost done.”

“Mmhm…okay, well, the bathroom is divided up, so just put your stuff wherever there’s space…what’s your name again?”

“Suzi. We share Film Genre together?”

“…Oh! Yeah, of course. Sure.”

Suzi felt her mouth drying. Be normal about it, she told herself. Her throat was starting to itch and her heart was picking up pace. Nessa had a territorial nature to her, a real attitude that probably indicated a certain level of entitlement.

And she could not get enough of it. She was like a cat — aloof, above it all, but cute enough to make anyone bend the knee. 

A part of Suzi knew it to be true, the other part scolded her for her taste: she liked Nessa. Really liked her. The thought of her hands getting tangled in that big fluffy ponytail, or her pinning her down with her cheerleader-level dexterity. Suzi bit the inside of her cheek. 

“Like” was perhaps not the right word. "Attracted to", despite her better judgement, was more accurate. 

“Look, the year's almost over,” Nessa huffed, tossing her books onto her mattress and walking over to her mirror to undo her earrings, “So we don’t have to be close, or anything. It’s fine. We can just keep to our own business, sound good?”

“Uhh, yeah! Totally…”

“Good.”

If she had to stay out of the way, that’s fine, that’s doable. She was a good observer. Her hearing was better than most, though, and she wasn’t sure if Nessa thought she was just another human or not. 

The weeks would pass where she would be playing some video game, or preoccupied with some hobby craft, and Nessa would be yammering to no end on the phone to her friends or her parents or — unfortunately — to her boyfriend. Jealousy wasn’t something that bothered Suzi. After all, the fantasy was more comfortable than the real thing, safe in her steel-plated dome. And this Dante guy Nessa was seeing was…probably a better fit anyway; something ‘bout motorcycles and the varsity team. Real foam on the pint stuff. The first time they’d shared conversation was a week or so in, when Nessa came back and saw Suzi with a controller in her hands in her pyjamas, a crate of beer to the side. That was nice, they talked about drama — or, Nessa did, Suzi only had things to chime in about the guys in her class. Turns out Nessa was big into activism though she knew next to nothing about it. The gnawing in Suzi’s stomach for her only grew as Nessa lost interest in the console and left her to her own devices. 

----------

The trouble started in spring. The first round of parties was picking up now that people had settled in. Nessa had woken up with a sniffle one Friday that caught Suzi’s attention — it was rough, she had followed up with a faint cough and a mutter of frustration and disdain. Not wanting to be confronted, she pretended to be asleep listening to her hurriedly readying herself before heading out for class. 

It was something she thought she could avoid. A cold. Her roommate and her preppy untouchable face would be met with the same ailment that ravaged the rest of the student body’s average looks. The thought of her red eyes all watery and pink paired with a rosy tint to her deer-like nose was enough to make Suzi bite her lip. 

An itch was creeping up her arms. A slight fuzz coated her backhand, the same colour as her honey-toned hair in softer curls. Same on her stomach, she realized as she tugged up her oversized tee shirt. She clenched the bedsheets and fell back into bed. 

“Shit…!” She seethed. The next few days were going to be torturous. She had to just go about normally while Nessa ruined her wastebasket with tissues and complained about whatever was troubling her. It hadn’t even started but it was the only way this could go, she would complain like it was a personal grievance.

Suzi scratched her cheek, careful not to dig a sharp painted nail into her skin; she wasn’t depraved enough to go sifting through used tissues but there was really no guarantee she wouldn’t look completely wrecked with yearning the next time she came in. Maybe foaming at the mouth, whimpering and pacing by the door...

The one solution she had was to just be out all day, hide away in the library or at a friend’s place or something…the less face-to-face she had to be, the better.

----------

“Where have you been?”

It was not the answer she was expecting when she opened the door back to her dorm. It was about eight in the evening, well past her regular class times. She'd been hanging around in the other residence building, reading comics with a friend when they decided it was time to wrap up. There was a block party that evening to get ready for — and by ready, they’d meant rushing out to grab drinks by the gallon. Suzanne had shrugged and mentioned she’d catch up. Best to grab a few things first. 

She cleared her throat as she sat on her bed, realizing Nessa had asked a question.

“Oh, uh, just at a friend’s place. Why?”

“I’m just curious…”

Nessa had a rasp to her voice. It made the tone all the more uninterested. When Suzi came in, she realized her roommate was putting on lipstick. 

“Are you going out?" Duh, of course. She added, "--to the party? The one on Fletching street?”

Suzi peeked around cautiously. Nessa’s outfit was splayed on the bed, a chic off-shoulder top and a pleated skirt, along with a tissue box, blue and scented. A jolt of pressure went to her stomach and she froze. 

“Uh, yeah,” Nessa answered with a sniffle, “Ugh, fuck…”

Almost a moan. 

“-I feel disgusting. My nose will not stop running…”

“Heh, yeah I hate it when that happens…” Suzi bit her tongue to keep from saying more. Nessa seemed to shuffle in the unexpected silence with a sigh before capping her lipstick again with a huff. 

“Probably some asshole from my group— the pitch, you know the one! Like, how hard is it to wipe off your pens before lending them out? Gross—“

“Yeah, gross.”

“…oh god…” Nessa suddenly whispered. She was turned away, but there was a rise in her shoulders that had Suzanne’s head jolting up. The sound was her reward, a pitchy, irritable sneeze that shook Nessa’s shorter frame, “—iiSCHHHyihww!! Ugh!!”

“Wow, bless you.”

She didn’t get a thanks. It seemed like that had done something to her make up and she was cussing out whatever force of nature had caused the sneeze. Tissues were being bunched up by the handful and she gave a sharp blow that sent a punch of pleasure into Suzi’s chest. Her eyes went wide. She felt her heart racing. Her fingers suddenly felt too sharp for the bedding, like her nails were clinging to the fabric, reading to cut the thread. 

“IisschHHYIHhwww!!”

That one was unrestrained, done off to the side with Nessa holding her hair from her face as to keep it from being caught in the line of fire. 

The thought of her germs clinging to the wooden bed frame brought a sound up from Suzi’s throat. Nessa turned around with a squint. 

The look turned to surprise almost immediately, and Suzi put her hands up with a gravelly clear of her voice. Nessa had staggered back in shock, likely at a change in her appearance. And she could guess what it was. 

Blurting out, Suzi shook herhands quicker, “It happens sometimes-!!”

“You— your teeth,” Nessa said despite her sniffling. She swiped at her nose and smudged the lipstick, “And ears!? You didn’t tell me you’re a lycan!”

“It’s— well, sorry! Oh, fuck-!”

Her tail. She felt it thump on the bed. Her skin itched, as did her gums. It took focus to not suddenly bare her fangs and start pacing.

“Sorry, sorry-“ She gritted her teeth, “It’s nothing. It happens on a whim! Don’t worry about it! I-I should also probably be getting ready!”

“What? You’re going too?”

“Yeah! Uh, my friend and I like to play games in their basement…!”

Nessa rubbed her nose with a look of disbelief. 

“Hold on a second! Why have I never seen you wolf out before?”

“You call it ‘wolfing out’?”

“Whatever, you know what I mean,” She strode over before Suzi could get up from the bed. Despite her earlier damning of keeping one’s germs to themselves, she reached over to feel a pair of canine ears as if to see if they were real. 

“We haven’t known each other for that long,” Suzi argued, beginning to squirm away. Nessa took her hand back and turned to sneeze again, over the tissues in her hand. They were barely used to clean up the mess in her nose, only remedying what had dripped out onto her lip. Her dark maroon lipstick almost shimmered, as if covered in gloss.

Suzi swallowed. Rubbing her own lip she could feel her teeth sharpening. There was a desire to sink her teeth into something, to feel flesh against her own body. She huffed strongly and stood up, shouldering Nessa away as she hurried into their shared bathroom. 

“Hey! What’s your problem?”

“N-nothing! Ugh, nothing! I’m not mad! I just don’t wanna-- make a mess! Fur will get all over my stuff!”

She was not one to transform out of malice, anger or spite. It was excitement that ticked it off. She wanted to smother any emotion too great just to avoid showing it in a way that was much harder to hide. 

“W-well clean up if you do…! I need to finish up my hair in there…!hheh—!”

Not again. Oh, for the love of god!

Nessa sneezed. Suzanne made a sound that was less than human. A deep silence fell over the room. 

“You know what?” Suzi said, desperately looking for an out, “You get in here-! Uh! I’ll…! I’ll head to the party later in the night! I feel weird!”

“…um, okay? You sure look that way…”

The in-between stage was not the most flattering. She stumbled out and fell into bed, curling up around a pillow with her eyes wide and ears alert. Fur had rippled over her shoulders and chest as well as under her stomach and over her legs. Her eyes had gone from green to a bright yellow and her curled hair became a messy mop of long, mane-like locks. Her tail remained swaying side to side on the sheets, and she clamped down on it between her knees to keep it from looking too enthusiastic. 

She didn’t look as Nessa finished changing and hastily made her leave. Probably didn’t want to stick around. Couldn’t blame her. 

Relief came as the sounds of sneezing vanished down the hall. 

Jesus Christ…she was more excitable than she’d previously thought. 

The feeling of panic began to subside, transforming and twisting into something else. Caution, then lust. One that sat heavily in her stomach. 

Nessa was on her way to the party…which meant some level of privacy was guaranteed. Suzi sighed quietly and settled back into bed and listened to the sounds of footsteps from the floor above, the thrum of AC through the vents. The gentle silence of the room.

Her hand slid past the drawstring of her shorts.

Maybe she could take a little longer to go to that party. Nobody would notice. Least of all Nessa.

[static-snz]

AN: 2300 words!! Ooh babey I said the sesbian lex snzfkr monsterfkr fic will show up and part 1 of ??? is here! Its kinda just the build up rn, so only horny implied, nothing explicit yet (and unfortch, a bit of exposition at the start lol) Oh my god they were roommates situation.

Context/tags: 1980s americana vibes college, but dnd races are there!! Nessa's a tiefling, Suzi's a lycan (werewolf) who's into snz stuff. I thought about a puppygirl who's manifestation of horniness is turning into a werewolf and nearly passed out, hence, this fic.

Cat and Dog Game

Nessa freaking Vahn. Of all the people she’d be now rooming with, Nessa of all people. 

Suzanne Chrysler dropped her duffel onto the bed and slid her purse off. A small change in rooming situations halfway through the year wasn’t that bad, just inconvenient, but she had been utterly gobsmacked by the person she’d been paired up with. 

Nessa, majoring in business and marketing, was a remarkably stunning person. A tiefling, from a small town over, where most of the college’s students come from. Nothing much happens here or there, but her parents had money and boy, did her personality reek of it. 

She had a sharp tongue, a certain edge to her style, her demeanor, and despite her typical disdain for class work she still had ambitions and bite. The confidence was so palpable one didn't even question if it was earned. Her hair probably weighed a tonne, always in a high ponytail with plenty of hairspray, and her nails were in a shade of pastel pink that was nothing like her saturated personality. She was also on the cheer team, something that Suzi knew based on the uniform hanging on the door hook. Of course, she’d never gone to any of the games, so…she never saw Nessa there. 

Instead, she’d catch glimpses of her in class; they shared a class — an elective for film and television. She saw now that there were a few posters over Nessa’s bed: most were what she’d expect, with A-listers and fashionably dressed couples, but a few horror flicks were up there too. 

Nessa’s bed…the floral sheets and the faint scent of perfume that lingered in the room.

She’d have to avoid thinking about it too much as she unpacked. She was alone now, but it would only be a matter of time before her new roommate would return. 

And she couldn’t think about that too much. She shouldn’t. 

Suzi had put away most of everything when Nessa had come back, looking momentarily startled that someone else was in the room. 

“Oh,” She said flatly as if recalling something meagre, “Right. I forgot you were moving in today.”

“Yeah! Hah! Well, here I am. Don’t worry I’m almost done.”

“Mmhm…okay, well, the bathroom is divided up, so just put your stuff wherever there’s space…what’s your name again?”

“Suzi. We share Film Genre together?”

“…Oh! Yeah, of course. Sure.”

Suzi felt her mouth drying. Be normal about it, she told herself. Her throat was starting to itch and her heart was picking up pace. Nessa had a territorial nature to her, a real attitude that probably indicated a certain level of entitlement.

And she could not get enough of it. She was like a cat — aloof, above it all, but cute enough to make anyone bend the knee. 

A part of Suzi knew it to be true, the other part scolded her for her taste: she liked Nessa. Really liked her. The thought of her hands getting tangled in that big fluffy ponytail, or her pinning her down with her cheerleader-level dexterity. Suzi bit the inside of her cheek. 

“Like” was perhaps not the right word. "Attracted to", despite her better judgement, was more accurate. 

“Look, the year's almost over,” Nessa huffed, tossing her books onto her mattress and walking over to her mirror to undo her earrings, “So we don’t have to be close, or anything. It’s fine. We can just keep to our own business, sound good?”

“Uhh, yeah! Totally…”

“Good.”

If she had to stay out of the way, that’s fine, that’s doable. She was a good observer. Her hearing was better than most, though, and she wasn’t sure if Nessa thought she was just another human or not. 

The weeks would pass where she would be playing some video game, or preoccupied with some hobby craft, and Nessa would be yammering to no end on the phone to her friends or her parents or — unfortunately — to her boyfriend. Jealousy wasn’t something that bothered Suzi. After all, the fantasy was more comfortable than the real thing, safe in her steel-plated dome. And this Dante guy Nessa was seeing was…probably a better fit anyway; something ‘bout motorcycles and the varsity team. Real foam on the pint stuff. The first time they’d shared conversation was a week or so in, when Nessa came back and saw Suzi with a controller in her hands in her pyjamas, a crate of beer to the side. That was nice, they talked about drama — or, Nessa did, Suzi only had things to chime in about the guys in her class. Turns out Nessa was big into activism though she knew next to nothing about it. The gnawing in Suzi’s stomach for her only grew as Nessa lost interest in the console and left her to her own devices. 

----------

The trouble started in spring. The first round of parties was picking up now that people had settled in. Nessa had woken up with a sniffle one Friday that caught Suzi’s attention — it was rough, she had followed up with a faint cough and a mutter of frustration and disdain. Not wanting to be confronted, she pretended to be asleep listening to her hurriedly readying herself before heading out for class. 

It was something she thought she could avoid. A cold. Her roommate and her preppy untouchable face would be met with the same ailment that ravaged the rest of the student body’s average looks. The thought of her red eyes all watery and pink paired with a rosy tint to her deer-like nose was enough to make Suzi bite her lip. 

An itch was creeping up her arms. A slight fuzz coated her backhand, the same colour as her honey-toned hair in softer curls. Same on her stomach, she realized as she tugged up her oversized tee shirt. She clenched the bedsheets and fell back into bed. 

“Shit…!” She seethed. The next few days were going to be torturous. She had to just go about normally while Nessa ruined her wastebasket with tissues and complained about whatever was troubling her. It hadn’t even started but it was the only way this could go, she would complain like it was a personal grievance.

Suzi scratched her cheek, careful not to dig a sharp painted nail into her skin; she wasn’t depraved enough to go sifting through used tissues but there was really no guarantee she wouldn’t look completely wrecked with yearning the next time she came in. Maybe foaming at the mouth, whimpering and pacing by the door...

The one solution she had was to just be out all day, hide away in the library or at a friend’s place or something…the less face-to-face she had to be, the better.

----------

“Where have you been?”

It was not the answer she was expecting when she opened the door back to her dorm. It was about eight in the evening, well past her regular class times. She'd been hanging around in the other residence building, reading comics with a friend when they decided it was time to wrap up. There was a block party that evening to get ready for — and by ready, they’d meant rushing out to grab drinks by the gallon. Suzanne had shrugged and mentioned she’d catch up. Best to grab a few things first. 

She cleared her throat as she sat on her bed, realizing Nessa had asked a question.

“Oh, uh, just at a friend’s place. Why?”

“I’m just curious…”

Nessa had a rasp to her voice. It made the tone all the more uninterested. When Suzi came in, she realized her roommate was putting on lipstick. 

“Are you going out?" Duh, of course. She added, "--to the party? The one on Fletching street?”

Suzi peeked around cautiously. Nessa’s outfit was splayed on the bed, a chic off-shoulder top and a pleated skirt, along with a tissue box, blue and scented. A jolt of pressure went to her stomach and she froze. 

“Uh, yeah,” Nessa answered with a sniffle, “Ugh, fuck…”

Almost a moan. 

“-I feel disgusting. My nose will not stop running…”

“Heh, yeah I hate it when that happens…” Suzi bit her tongue to keep from saying more. Nessa seemed to shuffle in the unexpected silence with a sigh before capping her lipstick again with a huff. 

“Probably some asshole from my group— the pitch, you know the one! Like, how hard is it to wipe off your pens before lending them out? Gross—“

“Yeah, gross.”

“…oh god…” Nessa suddenly whispered. She was turned away, but there was a rise in her shoulders that had Suzanne’s head jolting up. The sound was her reward, a pitchy, irritable sneeze that shook Nessa’s shorter frame, “—iiSCHHHyihww!! Ugh!!”

“Wow, bless you.”

She didn’t get a thanks. It seemed like that had done something to her make up and she was cussing out whatever force of nature had caused the sneeze. Tissues were being bunched up by the handful and she gave a sharp blow that sent a punch of pleasure into Suzi’s chest. Her eyes went wide. She felt her heart racing. Her fingers suddenly felt too sharp for the bedding, like her nails were clinging to the fabric, reading to cut the thread. 

“IisschHHYIHhwww!!”

That one was unrestrained, done off to the side with Nessa holding her hair from her face as to keep it from being caught in the line of fire. 

The thought of her germs clinging to the wooden bed frame brought a sound up from Suzi’s throat. Nessa turned around with a squint. 

The look turned to surprise almost immediately, and Suzi put her hands up with a gravelly clear of her voice. Nessa had staggered back in shock, likely at a change in her appearance. And she could guess what it was. 

Blurting out, Suzi shook herhands quicker, “It happens sometimes-!!”

“You— your teeth,” Nessa said despite her sniffling. She swiped at her nose and smudged the lipstick, “And ears!? You didn’t tell me you’re a lycan!”

“It’s— well, sorry! Oh, fuck-!”

Her tail. She felt it thump on the bed. Her skin itched, as did her gums. It took focus to not suddenly bare her fangs and start pacing.

“Sorry, sorry-“ She gritted her teeth, “It’s nothing. It happens on a whim! Don’t worry about it! I-I should also probably be getting ready!”

“What? You’re going too?”

“Yeah! Uh, my friend and I like to play games in their basement…!”

Nessa rubbed her nose with a look of disbelief. 

“Hold on a second! Why have I never seen you wolf out before?”

“You call it ‘wolfing out’?”

“Whatever, you know what I mean,” She strode over before Suzi could get up from the bed. Despite her earlier damning of keeping one’s germs to themselves, she reached over to feel a pair of canine ears as if to see if they were real. 

“We haven’t known each other for that long,” Suzi argued, beginning to squirm away. Nessa took her hand back and turned to sneeze again, over the tissues in her hand. They were barely used to clean up the mess in her nose, only remedying what had dripped out onto her lip. Her dark maroon lipstick almost shimmered, as if covered in gloss.

Suzi swallowed. Rubbing her own lip she could feel her teeth sharpening. There was a desire to sink her teeth into something, to feel flesh against her own body. She huffed strongly and stood up, shouldering Nessa away as she hurried into their shared bathroom. 

“Hey! What’s your problem?”

“N-nothing! Ugh, nothing! I’m not mad! I just don’t wanna-- make a mess! Fur will get all over my stuff!”

She was not one to transform out of malice, anger or spite. It was excitement that ticked it off. She wanted to smother any emotion too great just to avoid showing it in a way that was much harder to hide. 

“W-well clean up if you do…! I need to finish up my hair in there…!hheh—!”

Not again. Oh, for the love of god!

Nessa sneezed. Suzanne made a sound that was less than human. A deep silence fell over the room. 

“You know what?” Suzi said, desperately looking for an out, “You get in here-! Uh! I’ll…! I’ll head to the party later in the night! I feel weird!”

“…um, okay? You sure look that way…”

The in-between stage was not the most flattering. She stumbled out and fell into bed, curling up around a pillow with her eyes wide and ears alert. Fur had rippled over her shoulders and chest as well as under her stomach and over her legs. Her eyes had gone from green to a bright yellow and her curled hair became a messy mop of long, mane-like locks. Her tail remained swaying side to side on the sheets, and she clamped down on it between her knees to keep it from looking too enthusiastic. 

She didn’t look as Nessa finished changing and hastily made her leave. Probably didn’t want to stick around. Couldn’t blame her. 

Relief came as the sounds of sneezing vanished down the hall. 

Jesus Christ…she was more excitable than she’d previously thought. 

The feeling of panic began to subside, transforming and twisting into something else. Caution, then lust. One that sat heavily in her stomach. 

Nessa was on her way to the party…which meant some level of privacy was guaranteed. Suzi sighed quietly and settled back into bed and listened to the sounds of footsteps from the floor above, the thrum of AC through the vents. The gentle silence of the room.

Her hand slid past the drawstring of her shorts.

Maybe she could take a little longer to go to that party. Nobody would notice. Least of all Nessa.

[static-snz]

Angel shares the exploits of his day on set, in every sense. Niffty helps.

Had this in the works for a while. Spinoff on wavs by @zensations35 and @goodlucksnez. Hope yousa guys like~

[static-snz]

I really wanted to make something that explored the idea of Husk having limiters on his power as part of his deal. So when I got a request for Husk + rapid kitten snz, I decided to mix that in with this concept.

Basically interpreting the line “I sold my soul to save my power” as Husk literally giving his to Alastor for safekeeping. Kind of like what Alucard and Integra (Hellsing) have going on, but a little subverted.

Also wanted to try the Vivziepop-esque thing of deliberately omitting specific details around the plot so you all can fill in the gaps yourselves.

Enjoy! Script is below the cut.

.

Alastor: The wards, Husker.

Husk: Are you–are you shittin me? You can’t get us outta here because of some fuckin’ wards?

Alastor: Why don’t you make use of that telecommunications device of yours instead of complaining about it, hmm?

Husk: (Sighs) Fine. (Tapping on a phone keypad) I’m sending a–

Alastor: I am aware of what a text message is. I’m a luddite, not a simpleton.

Husk: (Clicks phone off) Right. Someone from the hotel should be over soon to let us out.

Alastor: (irritation palpable)…Soon.

Husk: Geez, got better things to do?

Alastor: Yes, actually! Though I suppose we can take a break for the next…?

Husk: Half-hour, at best. So get comfy. *soft sniffling*

Alastor: (Lighter) Know any card tricks?

Husk: That ain’t funny. 

Alastor: It’s a little funny. Almost as funny as you trying to delay the inevitable.

Husk: (Bewildered) How the fuck did you…?

Alastor: Despite all this bushwa I haven’t forgotten how you get around moss and mildew, my good man! *blows at the air*

Husk: (Shakily) Wh…what are you..?

Alastor: Just speeding up the process! *continues to blow debris around*

Husk: (Sneezers) fuckin’…(launches into a ticklish, kitten-like fit of sneezing)

Alastor: Ha-ha! There we go! Bravo indeed.

Husk: Yeah, yeah. Get your chuckles in. *Sniffs*

Alastor: Quite alright there?

Husk: Like you give a damn. (Starts sneezing again) I’m fiih–(sneeze)

Alastor: Ho, ho. Those really are too cute!

Husk: Shut it. (Pause) Look, Boss. Since we’re stuck here, we gonna talk about it, or ya gonna keep those cheaters on?

Alastor: (Inquisitive radio noises)

Husk: Like how we both know you aint hittin’ on all eight tonight– and don’t tell me it’s the fuckin wards, or some bullshit, cause y…(interrupts himself with sneezing)

Alastor: My, so allergic, Husker. 

Husk: Heh. Ya love to talk but you never actually say anything. *hitches*

Alastor: Well it’s a bit difficult to hold a proper conversation when you keep doing that. Do clean yourself up at least (summons tissue with a bit-back groan)

Husk: Uh, Boss?

Alastor: Hm?

Husk: The wards wouldn’t happen to be…painful to ya, or anything…right? (Alastor scoffs in the background)

Alastor: Oh applesauce! (Pause, where Husk is presumably giving him a Look) Mm, only in the emotional sense. 

Husk: *growls* Goddammit, Al. 

Alastor: It’s a little stinging! I don’t see why this is such a big deal. Pun not intended, haha!

Husk: And therein lies the problem. 

Alastor: Beg your pardon?

Husk: I…fuck hold on–(sneezes, then sighs) God. Never mind. Just…how can I help?

Alastor: By being your usual entertaining and oh so sensitive self of course! And you can never just stop at one, can you? Those sneezes of yours are so amusing.

Husk: I’m serious.

Alastor: I’m Alastor. Quite a pleasu–

Husk: That’s it. We’re blowin’ this joint. Look, uh. I can get us outta here…if you lift my seal.

Alastor: And whyever would I do that? Like you said, help is on the way.

Husk: Because I ain't keen on sneezin’ my head off the whole night and you, you’re clearly–

Alastor: (over mounting static) Very well.

Husk: *sputters*…Wow. You usually need more convincing–

Alastor: Don’t make me reconsider! (Heaves a sigh that betrays more than it should) I’ve simply grown bored of this.

Husk: Sure, Boss. 

Alastor: …Something on my face?

Husk: Nah. You just seem a little…(a disdained snort) well, it’s not like you’d tell me anyway.

Alastor: Oh, but I do so love it when you try to play detective! Did you know, Husker?

Husk: Hn?

Alastor: They used to use this place as more than a mere crossroads…well, let’s just say it would make even your toes curl. I daresay we’re the only ones in the Hotel aside from Charlie who can handle this little errand.

Husk: You sure about that, Boss? *begins to sneeze*

Alastor: Oh deary me, you are a little spastic tonight, aren’t you? 

Husk: Fuckin’ hell.

Alastor: (Laughs) What’s that saying? Pot calls the kettle?

Husk: That jives about as much as salty ice. *holding back more tickly sneezes*

Alastor: Says the man sitting on a rip in reality. 

Husk: *trying to choke back the urge* Fuckin’ hell!

Alastor: Speaking of, are you going to, ah, let rip, or do I have to come over there?

Husk: Ugh, fuck! (Hand over nose and mouth) Please don’t. *Sneezes burst forth*

Alastor: (Laughing) See? Fruitless to hold them in like that. (A pause, irritation slipping in when he notices Husk staring) What is it?

Husk: I mean, yeah, it’s a little funny, seeing you in pain, but I’m not into the whole torture thing. Like some people. I lost my taste for that a long time ago.

Alastor: How touching. I sometimes wish it was your hippocampus malfunctioning, rather than your cute little nose there!

Husk: *frustrated growl*  When you start breakin’ out the big words it’s how I know you’re hurtin’. Okay. Let’s do this.

Alastor: (Fabric rustles) Given our current, ah, predicament, this will hurt quite a bit.

Husk: The fuck? It’s never–

Alastor: I meant for me, darling. 

Husk: Hold on a sec…*lets out a few more sneezes*

Alastor: Now we haven’t all day. Your hand. 

Husk: (His grin audible) Heh, let’s ditch these bracelets, baby.

(Mounting static)

Alastor: (In a mix of broken French and Hebrew) In Tomb, let them remember why we don’t sing in churchyards, Duma. *shudders* I pray to you, *groans* I break your holy necklace, your Sheharanim.

(Groaning, Growling, snapping, wings flapping, eldritch sounds)

Alastor: (pained but relieved laughing) 

Alastor: Ahh! Much better!

Husk: Heh. Been a while since I got to do that.

Alastor: How I've missed the open sky. (Pauses) Hmm.

When the sunset bleeds between taupe and void And starbursts grow in the sand, From Jericho all is destroyed By a bleated, pyoid command. Discs of acetate in the dusk While you abrogate the Dawn Risks are taken, Husk Let my Fate be bygone. Or by Choice, from the weep-weary Sky To the sulfur Land, Be it time to die, Or to offer a helping hand.

Husk: Ya make that up just now?

Alastor: It came to me. 

Husk: Heh. Not that great a sunset.

Alastor: And once again the meaning is lost. 

Husk: (After sneezing a few times) You’re looking better, at least.

Alastor: (Hesitant) Yes, much better. Hand, please. Ah…the other one.

Husk: Eh, sorry. *Chuckles*

Alastor: (In broken Hebrew and French) I tighten the key of despair, I return the bones to silence. I return the bones to silence.

Husk: (Sneezes abruptly, tearing his hand away) Ah, shit. *rough fusillade of sneezes ensues*

Alastor: Health and spirits, Husker! 

Husk: *Coughing* Shut up. *blows nose wetly* Urgh. (Pause) Look, Boss. I may be sloshed half the time, but I ain’t an idiot. Are we gonna talk about why those wards were hurtin’ ya? 

Alastor: Hmmm. Seems pointless when you very well know the answer. 

Husk: Fuckin’ typical. 

Alastor: But I do, ah…appreciate what you did today. 

Husk: Holy shit. Are you actually sayin’–

Angel: Uhh, am I interruptin’ somethin’ here?

Alastor: Oh, Husker was just doing me a favor. I wore him out pretty well! 

Husk: I’m fine. (Sneezes)

Angel: Oh, bless ya there.

Husk: (Exhausted sneeze)

Angel: Geez, ya okay, Whiskas?

Husk: (Disgruntled) See previous statement. Ran into some irritants, is all.

Alastor: Irritants, hah! Hoo, oh you are amusing. (To Angel) I daresay he could use a bit of TLC, don’t you think?

Angel: Uh…

(Husk sneezing uncontrollably in the background)

Alastor: Perhaps an arnica bath. And a hot toddy! Oo, that sounds delightful–I’ll swing by with it later. And stop rubbing, Husker.

Husk: Ugh, itches. (Sneezes)

Alastor: Hm.

Angel: (To Husk, when he recovers) Any reason Al’s bein’ so nice ta ya?

Husk: (Sniffles) Nope. 

Angel: Riiight. 

(Hotel doors open to the sound of muted jazz)

Alastor: Hmm. Perhaps this silly little hotel is rubbing off on us both. Who knows?

Angel: (Snickering) Rubbing off, ya say?

Husk: *groans*

Alastor: *laughs awkwardly*

End.

[static-snz]

Basically six minutes of A.dam trying to sit through a meeting despite an unrelenting tickle in his nose and making a gross ass of himself.

[static-snz]

I was scrolling on Pinterest and I found some vanillas

Initial pin. These were some of the comments under it.

[static-snz]

TL,DR enjoy a desperate hitching wet sneezing fit xx

I’m sick again. Yesterday was the sneeziest day yet. Yesterday included mini fits of sneezes, plus Verrryyy regular intense single or double sneezes. My nose got no peace from the moment I woke up until about 3pm when I finally took a nap. Basically a long way to say some sneeze content is incoming.

[static-snz]

would it be possible for you to do a scenario even faked that would be cool. Where your sneezes are caused by noseplay because your nose is just that sneezy? Or because its already allergic and sensitive

Helloooooo 😄 just to check…does nose play mean like nose rubbing?! Or like feathers/sneeze inducers? Pls help 🙏

[static-snz]

“once I start, I can’t stop” is one of the most cliché sneeze lines but damn if it doesn’t get me every. single. time.

[static-snz]

Having a snz kink with sensory issues is crazy cuz I will zork my shit to snzfics but then when I have to sit in a quiet room with someone I don’t know sniffling randomly every few minutes I start feeling VIOLENT. /hj

[static-snz]

"Is it a kink or a fetish?" a secret third thing where if somebody even just says 'I need a tissue' in the right voice around me all the blood rushes to my head and I pass out immediately

[static-snz]

No doodles just A TEST ANIMATION ON FLIPACLIP BECAUSE I FELT COOL HEHEH, YEAH , BET YOU DIDTN EXPECT THAT

[static-snz]

More drenching sneezes...

[static-snz]

Remade an old Chi/aki Na/nami picture that I did!! It’s a good thing that 3ds has a pause button on it, ja?