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we do need to revisit the wording of "you can't have your cake and eat it too" because i don't think it clearly enough conveys that it's more that you can't simultaneously retain a cake and also get to consume it (which would render you cakeless). for years i was like But why not....it's my cake....?

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Killed a spider n now I feel bad :/

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ancient greek word of the day: κακοθερής (kakotherēs), unfitted to endure summer heat

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I find it very funny that my brother is romancing Lae’zel as a wizard who (very recently) went down three times.

Like I went from ‘I’m a wolf hehe’ to ‘…well fuck, Starry Form: Chalice’ very quickly just because he and Astarion went down at the same time. So basically I went full-healing and I managed to not get hit ONCE

Granted, the Animated Armor were using crossbows and I was standing right in front of one whilst being on a ledge-thing so… yeah that’s probably why

But still. Like it’s just very funny to me that he’s romancing her but he goes down like three times in a fight

Like the irony of having a githyanki fighting as your romance (war race) and being a half-elf wizard is funny… especially considering we’re both wood half-elves, so we’re essentially siblings in-game I’ve decided

I REALLY want him to get to her Act 2 romance scene just because I HAVE to know how that ends…

(Actually, maybe there’s irony in a Druid romancing an undead. After all, a Druid is meant to uphold the laws of nature, something that an undead definitely defies. So that’s also a pretty neat thing)

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gubby says trans rights

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I have to assume that in the fullness of time, at least once, a mouse has used a mushroom as an umbrella.

That’s enough to keep me going.

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Two things I need Today's Youth to know:

1. Anything the government says is propaganda

2. 99% of vegetables taste better roasted

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bitch this is all you’re gonna get. this life, this face, this body. you better not ‘maybe in another universe’ your way out of everything. sit your ass down and face this. go make tea and have a picnic and read a goddamn book. kiss your loved ones, send that damn text, and hug your siblings. this is all you’re gonna get.

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put those big boba eyes back inside your head young lady

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the holidays are never officially here until i see the christmas light extension cord of death by electricity and I have yet to see it.

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People are like “it’s so beautiful no clouds at all” it could use a little clouds if I had to be honest.

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people will tell you they hate tofu and think its disgusting and then you ask them how they prepared it and you find out they cooked it in the most disturbingly bland unseasoned way possible. like yeah no shit

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コヨシキリ（Black-browed reed-warbler）

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Do you think my grandma knows that when I ‘sign her into’ YouTube on the TV I’m basically just signing in as a guest?

…Probably not, but still.

Also!!! I figured out why my ankles have been hurting!!

My tendons are chronically inflamed from having flexible flat feet :’)

It’s not an injury. It’s just my mom’s genetics passing down onto me (my dad has high arches, and my brother had flat feet so badly that his hamstrings were short)

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The fact that animals that care for their young will sometimes adopt others' lost or orphaned young to raise along their own is just funny to me. I know that it's all hormonal and there's no conscious thought involved in it, but the internal logic of it is so funny.

"Baby = success. More baby = more success. I have one baby and I found four other baby. I have five baby. I am being so fucking successful right now."

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the tiktok itself is funny but i’m deeply obsessed with this dog