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"I asked chat gpt"

Sucks for you, I asked the ceasless watcher and I now legally own your most traumatic experience

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Matt Menard is literally always ready to beat someone’s ass with a crowbar whenever Danny is in the vaguest bit of trouble and I personally love that for him.

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It was mostly ass but Becky/Lyra was really good, fwiw

I just got home.

Was Backlash ass?

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cass deserves to be taken by surprise. sometimes :]

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my mans running animation only got two frames

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PROTOBANGIN

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went to my best friend’s house last night and saw a little plushie dog and plushie cat that had been sewn together down the middle into a two-headed chimera. I said, “did you do that?” she said, “yes, I saved them.”

turns out at her old job when the last two plushies hadn’t sold and became deadstock, her boss told her to cut them up and throw them out. so she cut them each in half, preserved their heads, and then rebuilt them together.

cannot stop thinking about the way these little plushies were approached with the instinct of a Vampire or some sort of ancient god. “Let me save you [turn you into a monster].”

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cheeseburger.

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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have elected a new Pope.

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“Enjoy Websurfing” ⌘ Digital real estate, mostly occupied by squatters

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i was at a coffee shop in some random town once waiting on my drink. i was the only person there until someone walked in and walked up to the register and they said something crazy like "don't fuck up my order this time, bitch" and i was sooooooo exhausted i stepped forward and i was just like [firm angry mom voice] "no. no. hey. you need to leave right now." and the barista and the customer both turned to me in abject shock and the barista started laughing and the customer looked horrified like they hadn't seen me when they came in and they said "i'm so sorry oh my god I work here. we're friends. i was just messing with them."

and i was like OH! that's a relief.

the barista was still laughing and they said "you were really about to fight for me. i love that." I said was in food service long enough that i'm always ready to fight a customer at any moment. i would have gone for blood. i would've used my teeth.

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t shirt that says i've misunderstood many social interactions

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everyone on replies is terrified of this fact but i just think it's so sweet and heartwarming. she's holding our hand and leading us somewhere secret and we're both giggling like kids. i love her

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Children please stop calling the slightest hint of sexual desire “gooning” I’m going to strangle all of you