stuck-with-my-self - Tumblr blog

[stuck-with-my-self]

Halo

The crushing weight of a halo keeps wearing me down

would it hurry up and crush me already, my wings

already are broken, just stop the suffering please.

Let me rest.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Not myself if i feel fine, not myself when broken,

nothing seems to work, nothing ever will.

I feel fine, and there's a buzz of thoughts,

“we miss being broken, we want to be us”.

We are broken, and the buzz shuts off,

but everything feels wrong still.

[stuck-with-my-self]

constantly in discomfort

I feel normal, for the first time in days.

But my mind refuses to accept it,

There's no way I can be fine, right?

Maybe I should just break myself,

then the uncertainty will be gone.

[stuck-with-my-self]

There is something inside of me

tearing me apart, opening me up

every tiny part of me, hurt as it goes through us

we scream, yell, beg for relief

but if you try to move, you just make it worse,

if you stay still, the discomfort is too much

everything screams: getitoutgetitoutgetitoutgetitout

flinch, it went wrong, the discomfort's gone, but you were hurt so much more

stay in place, there is less pain now, but you know there's something wrong

the exhaustion, the wounds, it's too much, but you found a way out

You're free, no more pain, no more discomfort, a little bit of rest,

we're 'fixed',

But you miss being broken, don't you?

You'll just go running back to what's familiar in a couple days,

Like we always do.

[stuck-with-my-self]

There is something inside of me

tearing me apart, opening me up

every tiny part of me, hurt as it goes through us

we scream, yell, beg for relief

but if you try to move, you just make it worse,

if you stay still, the discomfort is too much

everything screams: getitoutgetitoutgetitoutgetitout

flinch, it went wrong, the discomfort's gone, but you were hurt so much more

stay in place, there is less pain now, but you know there's something wrong

the exhaustion, the wounds, it's too much, but you found a way out

You're free, no more pain, no more discomfort, a little bit of rest,

we're 'fixed',

But you miss being broken, don't you?

You'll just go running back to what's familiar in a couple days,

Like we always do.

[stuck-with-my-self]

I can only assume that the homosexuality is stored in the ass

-Easy

Cut open my ass,

let my gayness out, it shall

be free forever

[stuck-with-my-self]

Too long.

The days are so long, unable to pad them out, driving me insane

[stuck-with-my-self]

Purpose.

My goal has been reached, But there is still time to pass, I need another.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Uncertainty.

I do not know if There is "I" or "We", is it Me, or is it Us?

[stuck-with-my-self]

No choice.

We are just like this,

Maybe we can work it out,

Would that be okay?

[stuck-with-my-self]

Enemy.

We were enemies, Or so we thought, it turns out, we just had to talk.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Diagnosis.

A diagnosis, well, you did not make it up, What do we do now?

[stuck-with-my-self]

Body.

a delicate thing, The human body, a pain To keep it alive.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Afraid.

afraid and alone pushing through it all, with hope it will thrive, one day.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Understanding.

Cannot understand, Its' feelings a mystery Surviving, barely.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Disappointment.

Expectations high, Abilities, lack thereof Clearly, a failure.

[stuck-with-my-self]

Stuck together.

Empty, shattered, yet Full of static, in one piece Devoid of reason.