stuff-for-millennials

[stuff-for-millennials]

For a long time, I focused on dating stuff

I have decided to take a different track. I just want to talk about general struggles that people in my generation may face

[stuff-for-millennials]

21st century dating is a trip!

I just came to the realization that I only started dating in the 21st century (I'm in my late 30s but didn't start interacting with guys like that until my late teens). Obviously things are different now than they were 20 years ago, but the online dating revolution began way back then.

I used dating sites on a computer in my younger days (before phones had that capability), and of course it was a bit different than it is today. However, I think that's where the whole concept of having a "menu", if you will, of potential dates to choose from began.

As long as it's agreed upon, people nowadays can choose each other for dates like we choose our groceries... And having this virtual catalog of potential matches to choose from is so vastly different from how previous generations operated.

My parents met at a party in the 70s. My dad's parents met at the hospital they both worked at in the 40s. My mom's parents were from the same small town in Vermont and met when my grandmother was 18, also in the 40s.

The way people meet is often different than it was way back when, and my theory is that because of this, it affects the way that people even approach dating in the first place. If the only options for dating are a handful of people in a small town, or one's co-workers, perhaps that's part of why dating seemed more "human" back then.

Now that "swiping" between potential dates is not only a part of the vernacular but also part of the culture, no wonder that dating can be so dehumanizing! Ghosting, the slow fade, etc are all things that are a part of 21st century dating in a way that they were NOT a part of 20th century dating.

I don't know what the solution is, but I think recognizing these generational differences in dating could be a start.

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Wondering what it is about my profile that indicates that I like to be "passed around" or "tag teamed" 🤦🏼‍♀️

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I'm still scratching my head about this one... And he has not elaborated.

After a long hiatus due to being involved with someone, I'm back on Bumble and Facebook Dating. So, I'll be updating this more often!

Stay tuned for my next post, where I will discuss my feelings about all the poly/ENM men I now come across in online dating.

[stuff-for-millennials]

Not related to dating at all...

Do you all remember Homestar Runner / Strong Bad / Teenage Girl Squad? My older sister introduced me to it and I LOVED it!

[stuff-for-millennials]

Saw this online today and was cackling 😂

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Umm, thanks?

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"Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for."

That's a real opening line I received on Facebook dating. I was literally laughing out loud when I read that!

Cheesy pickup lines 👎

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Where's the lie?

[stuff-for-millennials]

Hello Beautiful am looking for a loyal and honest sugar baby and i know you'll be the perfect baby for me. I will have to pay you an allowance of $400 twice a week 😍❤😍😘

No thank you

[stuff-for-millennials]

When Okcupid asked why I was disabling the app...

I'll probably restart it in a few days though haha. But I recently purged all but 1 dating app (Plenty of Fish). Again, I'll probably sign up for them again in a week or so.

I'm just so tired of all the guys that are only interested in me for my body, rather than me as a person. But this is online dating these days - it's all about the hook up. No matter how many times I delete and recreate profiles on the various dating apps, I don't see that changing anytime soon.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - dating is dead.

[stuff-for-millennials]

If you talk to him late Friday night, for the first time in several days, after you initiated the conversation... And the only time he has available to spend with you the whole weekend is midnight on Friday night... And when you question him about this, and his response is "I guess I'm living in the moment"... He might be a fuck boy (nah he's definitely a fuck boy).

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Yeah so, that luck I thought I was having? Not so much. Basically every guy has turned out to be just trying to get in my pants, a jerk, not very serious about actually meeting, or all of the above. I'm turning 36 in a few hours... My prediction is that in 4 years, I'll have to change the name of this blog to dating in your 40s 🤷🏼‍♀️

[stuff-for-millennials]

"Oral hook up site" - that's a new one!

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I'm actually doing OK on the dating sites recently! Friday night I went on a date for the first time in a while, and I have been chatting with several guys. Might have another few dates coming up too! Not sure why my luck is better all of the sudden but I'm not complaining! Hopefully one of these guys ends up being a good match for me!

[stuff-for-millennials]

This is what online dating is like for women. All. The. Time. I'm on about half a dozen different dating apps right now, and most of the guys that I interact with are like this. Or send unsolicited dick pics. Or ask to see pics of my boobs, etc.

They may not come right out and be this skeevy though. It may come in the form of asking them what they are looking for, and getting answers like "someone to hang out with", or "fun and hanging out", etc. All of which are nice ways of saying a female to spend time with and have sex with, but without any sort of commitment, so as to leave open the option for the same arrangement with other females.

It's disappointing that as I approach 36, and the fact that most of the men that I chat with on these apps are within a few years of my age, that it's STILL like this. It was one thing in my 20s, or even in my early 30s. But dealing with this type of behavior for basically half of my life has just become exhausting and increasingly disheartening.

Here's hoping my mid to late 30s are better 🤞

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So charming!