sugar-spice-and-everything-dice - Tumblr blog

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complaining about high elves and sharing inside job gossip. the sisters ever actually

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i’m obsessed i think

bonus

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you know it’s good when zac has brennan questioning if he’ll be able to finish the season nine minutes into the finale

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i mean this in an entirely platonic, slightly powerhungry way, but i love when people call me the friendly "boss." like "you got is boss" or "whatever ya say, boss." it's so fun. like we're in the worlds shittiest cartoon mafia

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"I Went On A Dangerous Expedition and All I Got Was This Weird Meat"

more nonsense under the cut:

most of this hinged on opening an ancient can of Mystery Meat and immediately tasting it

we had a great time

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The wild thing about being obsessed with your own DnD campaign is that there's absolutely NO fandom content for it except the stuff that you make

Like, what do you mean only six other people in the entire world have heard of Dave the Ice Elemental whose job is Freezer at the Fantasy Starbucks?

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the last stand

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You Must Honor The Cock

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Monsters that are more dexterous than the Saint of Doubt and Mystery Kristen Applebees (4 dex)

Awakened Tree/shrub (8)

Black pudding (5 same modifier)

Gray ooze (6)

Tarrasque (11)

Zombie (6)

Iron Golem (9)

Shambling Mound (8)

Purple worm (7)

Kristen Applebee's Dex is so bad the only monsters I could find with worse are

Gelatinous Cube (3)

Violet Fungus (1)

Gas Spore (1)

Yellow Musk Ivy (3)

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Kinda tired of Kristen getting attacked with this re-occurring accusation that she doesn’t try and doesn’t care. All she has done this season is try! All she does is care! She’s spent every moment of the campaign trying to fix things with Cassandra! Even the silly bits Ally does that don’t make sense to us have a coherent motivation behind them. On its face, Kristen going to the middle school seemed like a waste of time, but Ally explained in the corresponding adventuring party episode that they wanted to investigate the area more because it was near the murder scene. Also the way Ally constantly uses game mechanics to help others is so genuinely kind. And it’s not even just for the party members. It’s for the NPCs. It’s giving Lydia the help action. It’s casting death ward on Aelwyn. It’s doing a ritual so Lucy and her teacher can rest in peace. Kristen constantly does the most to show she cares and is trying and yet is the only party member who’s constantly experiencing narrative consequences. She’s the only member who’s constantly accused of not caring!

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honestly it tracks so hard that adaine, the punchiest wizard ever, learned bigby’s hand and like, just *socked* a purple worm with it.

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Endless Fantasy High

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the best part about being an artist is making the shit you want for yourself so pls enjoy my poster sketch based on this weeks episode bc i literally cannot stop thinking about it

this is gonna take forever to render but it will be so worth it

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Taking someone's cigarette out of their mouth: Multiple meanings - used a lot in media to convey control, power play, very masculine, I'm your boss and this is mine now, get over it. Mildly flirty, look at me, all in your space and shit, seductive. You're not allowed to smoke, because I say so.

Putting the cigarette back in their mouth afterwards: Ground-breaking. Would be less erotic to just fuck honestly. Who does this?

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the scene between kristen and her parents plagues me.

can you imagine? meeting your parents for the first time in two years, just to go "im alive, you're alive too, just wanted to check up on you" and to be met yet again with that judgemental stare? i can't stop thinking about them belittling her favourite teacher infront of her without even offering single word of condolences when they found out she passed, about how her father said "helio wouldn't have let that happen" not knowing helio allowed kristen to die two times without intervention. thinking about how they belittled her relationship with tracker too, calling her saviour and the love of her life "that friend or roommate of yours" saying that if tracker choose helio over galicaea helio would have healed her of lycanthropy? which is absolute bullshit because we know tracker used to be heliolic before her parents kicked her out for having questions and doubts. thinking about how YET AGAIN they belittled her life choices, reminding her of how she walked out on being helios' chosen one, telling her that perhaps its not too late, trying to convince her that she's meant to be the chosen one because she brought the sun back after months of darkness, completely unaware of the sacrifices she and her friends made to make that happen. thinking about how the only happiness they showed that entire dinner was when kristen showed interest in going to church with them again, thats the only time they smiled or showed any tenderness in their hearts for her.

Thinking about how they never loved her, they loved kristen applebees, cleric and chosen of helio, not kristen, their daugher. they loved the version of her that exists in their minds, not her.

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Fabian, put down the scalpel.

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the latest fhjy ep having “murder of a minor” in the content warnings: okay, it’s a big, terrifying fight and it’s entirely possible one of the bad kids goes down. we’ve been through this before, it’ll be fine

the actual murder of a minor happening: