sunskisser

[sunskisser]

thank you for the tag lovely mk!! <3

npt 🏷️: @foodiegoogie @g1rld1ary @lovemenotts @neverthatsirius-jo @m00nkissedlover @notyaslol

PICREW TAG GAME!!!

use this picrew maker, and tag your moots!

Me!! It looks quite close to me in irl :3

no pressure tags!:

@whatonearthisgoingon @mrecury42 @mochamoony @yes-ofc-i-bite @acelovesremuslupin @notthesodaa @theheightsarewuthering

[sunskisser]

two years, and some change

sirius black x fem!reader | 3.3k

summary: two years after james and lily got married, they have a baby for you to watch over while they go on a date. unexpectedly, you earn yourself an unlikely partner in the house—sirius black. (the tag-team babysitter theme was inspired by this fic!) cw/tags: fluff, slight angst, crackfic, supreme husband material james, jily moments, baby harry potter, inaccurate one-year-old behavior, sirius and reader are bitter but friends, reader gets closure, sirius is kinda yearning, and an open ending. lmk if i missed any <3 note: after almost a year... here is pt 2 to bittersweet reminiscing! this is my take on what would happen after the wedding and everything... unfortunately, reader does not fall in love w somebody else here (or... does she?)

<- the prequel | the sequel ↓ (but both can be read as a stand-alone)

“So bedtime’s at 8 PM, and if he gets fussy, there’s formula in the cupboard. I already taught you how to make his bottle, right?” Lily said, green eyes wide with motherly worrying. 

You nod your head, smiling reassuringly at her, “Yes, you have.” 

The redhead takes your answer with a relieved sigh. “Right… what else is there… er—“ 

“Darling, I love you, and I love how much you love our son—but the reservation we made at that Muggle restaurant won’t keep waiting for us.”

A soft chuckle escapes your lips, and James winks at you as he enters the mudroom, shrugging on his coat to brave the cold outside. Since he and Lily had married, he was almost always at least a step behind his wife.  

“Oh, James,” She says, sheepish with her worrying. “You’re right—I’m sorry.” 

At the sight of her husband appearing beside her, Lily visibly deflates. It’s a wonder how someone you once called ‘the bane of your existence’ could also be someone you’ll vow to spend the rest of your life with. 

“Tsk. Never apologise for nothing, my love,” James chastises his wife with a kiss on the top of her head. 

You watch them for a while longer. Lily looks up at James and smiles, listening to him reassuring that Harry would be just fine without his parents for a night. Your chest fills up with something wistful and longing. But not to be in Lily’s place, not anymore. Just… for what it feels like to have the kind of love that they share. The love that seems too good to be true. 

“—and who knows?” James continues. “Maybe Haz’ll like hanging out with Y/N so much, she’ll have no choice but to keep babysitting him! Then we’ll get to go on dates more often.”

“I’m still here, you know,” You comment dryly.

He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he steps toward you, draping an arm over your shoulder. “Of course, and the missus and I are so grateful for your service. Really! Can’t thank you enough for it.”

Suddenly, a loud wail sounded from somewhere in the house, alerting all three of you at once.

“I’m assuming that’s Harry awake from his nap?” You chuckle, slightly amused.

“Yep,” Lily sighs, but she’s got a smile on her face that tells you she’s not bothered by the crying. “I’ll be right back, guys.”

She moves back into the house, heading for the nursery to pick up the little lad you’d come to watch over for your friends.

“You know… she’s always with him—Lily,” James says after a moment, eyes still trained onto the spot where his wife had just been. Then he shifts his gaze to you, smiling softly. “It really means a lot that you get to do this for us.”

There’s a meaningful kind of look in his eyes as they’re still on you. In the past, you might have taken it as something to hope for, to lose sleep on and think does he like me? 

But times have changed, and you mirror his smile with one of your own, sincere and genuine. You’ve come a long way since Hogwarts—the both of you have. And you wouldn’t change a single thing about how things turned out.

“Don’t mention it,” You eventually reply.

Just as James opens his mouth to respond, probably with a comment glorifying your “humility,” Lily returns with their son in her arms. 

“Look who just woke up…” She announces gently, careful not to startle the one-year-old in her arms. Little Harry blinks groggily at the light overhead in the mudroom, slumped against his mother’s shoulder.

James coos at the sight of his wife and son together. But mostly, really, he’s overcome with sweetness as he nears Lily to scoop Harry up from her arms.

“Hello, Hazza!” He greets Harry, who responds with a gurgle of his own.

Then, the doorbell rings. You assume Lily had it installed for Muggle reasons.

You turn to your friends’ little family, and start walking towards the front door. “I’ll go get it.”

Behind you, Lily thanks you kindly, but it’s slightly drowned out by the sound of James talking to Harry. He’s always been loud, James… but you don’t think you’ve ever heard him love so loud before until his son was born.

Three knocks sound against the wooden front door as you go to open it. 

“How impatient…” you mutter under your breath. Your hand twists the doorknob finally, pulling the door open and—

Sirius looks away from behind him, turning back to face you with his own surprise on his face. He tilts his head slightly, eyes narrowed.

“What are you doing here?” You both chorus. 

Then you share a short moment of laughter, soft chuckles leaving your lips while Sirius did the same. 

But it’s him who recovers from the moment first. “I’m here to—”

“I’m here to babysit… Harry…” You pause yourself, having just said the exact same thing as he did. Again.

Sirius chuckles, though a little unsure. “Well… that’s interesting. Moons told me—”

“Padfoot?!” James calls out from behind you, carrying Harry still in his arms. “Oh, this day just got so much better!”

“Sirius?” Lily appears in between you and James by then, also surprised by his arrival, but she masks it instantly with a kind smile. “Why don’t you come in?”

And so, Sirius Black is let in the Potter household. You step aside, still reeling in the small shock of seeing another one of your best friends, unexpectedly. It’s not like it was a big deal… but it’s been months—nearly a year, since you last saw Sirius.

James hands you baby Harry, breaking you out of your trance and reminding you of reality. The baby makes a disagreeing sound as soon as he’s transferred to you, but you adjust your hold on him and make him comfortable. Soon enough, Harry’s entertained by the necklace sitting on your chest. 

You watch James and Lily talk with Sirius. Soon, you learn that the latter had come by because apparently, Remus told him that Harry needed some babysitting. That his parents couldn’t find anyone else to do it, so Sirius should. Naturally, as godfather, he showed up.

But then the raven-haired man gets told by Lily that you had been up for the job. Ever since James had phoned you about planning a date with his wife. Sirius looks confused, so does Lily, and James… he looks just fine. 

He looks happy, even. But maybe a little too… happy.

“Interesting…” James speaks up after a while, looking between you and Sirius with narrowed eyes. “Very interesting.”

Then, silence—which then gets broken by the curious noises Harry was making as he pulled at your necklace. 

“Well, the two of you make a great team!” His father exclaims, taking his wife by the hand and pulling her towards the front door, still slightly ajar. 

Lily is startled but doesn’t pull away. “Wait, James—”

“But my wife and I have got some place to be—”

“James,”You and Sirius chorus, again.

“—and I’d hate to disappoint her,” James stops just below the doorframe, still holding Lily who now stands outside the house. 

Then, he turns to the baby in your arms, and smiles dopily at him. “Be good, Haz. Mumma and Dada love you.”

At that, Harry turns away from your necklace and makes grabby hands at his Dada. That warrants an alarm for all four of the adults currently in his radar at the moment.

“Alright, just call us if you need anything! Goodbye!” James gets a hand on the doorknob, pulling the door close.

“James—”

Lily looks mildly betrayed behind her husband. “James Fleamont Potter—”

And the parents are finally out of sight.

For a solid five seconds, everything is quiet. You and Sirius share a wary glance with each other, before you turn to Harry in your arms.

And then, everything is not quiet. The boy squirms in your arms, and you fight to keep him still and comfortable at the same time. Then, Harry starts to whine, calling pitifully out for his Mumma, sending both you and Sirius into slight, but controlled panic.

“Alright,” Sirius says, moving to take Harry from you. “Why don’t you hand him over—”

“Uh, no thank you?” You tell him, twisting your body away with Harry in tow, but you’re still struggling. 

“Like you know how to calm him down,” you continue.

“Oh, and you know how?”

You’re rendered silent by that, now bouncing Harry up and down absentmindedly. 

“Okay, fair point.”

“Listen, we won’t get Harry to calm down if we fight,” Sirius says, glancing worriedly at his godson. “So we’ll have to cast our egos aside and help each other out, alright?”

You look down at Harry in your arms, now mumbling around his fist in his mouth. You’re not sure if he was teething or still lamenting over the absence of his parents. You look back up at Sirius.

“So be it, then.”

═══════

They say it takes a whole village to raise a child.

You have no idea how James and Lily had a whole village to raise Harry.

But in the homely space that was their kitchen, you couldn’t find a place where there might be the whole village you and Sirius needed at the moment.

Harry was crying. Actually, he has been since his parents had gone off to their rare date night and left you and Sirius to take care of him. But you were growing more and more worried and panicky as the one-year-old ceased to stop. You felt awful, not because of the baby, but because of your poor handling of the baby.

You could tell Sirius was just as stressed, too. His humor and comedic attempts at distracting the baby did work a few times. But alas, Harry just wanted his Mumma and Dada back.

Now, you were trying to get the one-year-old to take the bottle you just made for him. But he keeps refusing, curling into Sirius’ neck and weeping still. You try very hard not to be frustrated with Harry himself. You don’t want to traumatize the poor boy by getting stern from desperation.

You sigh heavily, running a hand over your face. “Sirius, I dunno what to do.”

“S’okay, s’okay…” He whispers to Harry in his arms, bouncing him slightly. 

“This is not how I pictured my first babysitting gig.”

“Well, that makes two of us,” Sirius snaps back, but gently.

It’s all comical, really. You’ve both been passive-agressively bickering while trying to get Harry to calm down. You keep repeating to yourself internally to not fight for the baby, but it’s getting awfully difficult to stick to the rule.

“Wait,” Sirius looks up from Harry, facing you with wide eyes. “I’ve got an idea.”

“Well, it better work. Have at it.”

With that, he transfers Harry to you, and you accept him with careful arms. Considerably, he’s not crying as hard and as much as he was earlier. You feel immense relief for your eardrums as you help the baby get comfortable against you.

“Alright,” You murmur, gently thumbing away the tear streaks on Harry’s face. Then you look back up at Sirius—

—but he isn’t there.

A bark breaks through your short moment of confusion.

At your feet, Padfoot is sitting with what looked like a smile, his tongue out and all that. The sounds of a dog panting inevitably grabs Harry’s attention, and you get the sense that the baby’s finally faced with someone he recognizes.

Because then, he babbles ba-ba-ba as if attempting to say Padfoot himself. Harry makes grabby hands at the black dog, leaning down toward him to get closer. You hold onto him tightly.

“Alright, alright,” You say, starting towards the one spacious area in the house. “Let’s take it to the living room, gentlemen.” 

And in less than five minutes, Harry’s lying on his stomach on the living room floor, giggling and “conversing” with Padfoot. Meanwhile, the black dog wags his tail, barks quietly, and plays the part of a friendly animal to entertain his godson.

You watch them with tired eyes and a fond smile. Padfoot trots around Harry in a circle like a prancing horse and earns himself a baby’s giggle.

You narrow your eyes at the dog, who stops his trotting and tilts his head at you, as if asking, “Why don’t you join us?”

But instead, you say, “This doesn’t make you the favorite godparent, by the way.”

Padfoot— no, Sirius (because you know the prick) responds indirectly by nudging Harry’s cheek, eliciting another giggle from the baby. 

═══════

Somewhere after you manage to make Harry take a bottle, the baby dozes off miraculously against your shoulder.

Soon enough, he’s plopped down in his crib on his back, and dreaming the night away. You chose to stick behind while Sirius was off somewhere in the house, probably helping himself to the pantry.

But then the door creaks open, waking you from your half-sleep. You didn’t even realize you were dozing off against the crib, while seated on the floor of the nursery.

“Sorry,” Sirius whispers, holding two mugs of something steamy. “Did I wake you?”

Before you answer him, you cast a glance at your godson, sighing quietly out of relief when he doesn’t stir. 

“No, you’re fine,” You answer him, accepting the mug he offers you as he goes to sit by the other end of the crib. “Thanks.”

You look down at the mug’s contents, and unexpectedly, it’s not tea that you find. It’s too dark in the nursery to be sure. But in the night light set above Harry’s crib, you make out the brown colour of chocolate.

Just slightly, you look back up at Sirius, who’s sipping on his drink—probably tea—while watching his godson sleep soundly.

“This… isn’t tea,” You tell him, voice low and soft.

Sirius looks back at you, slightly alarmed. “Did you want tea? Here, you can have mine—”

“No, no. I didn’t mean it like that…” You’re quick to stop him, waving a dismissive hand. “It’s just—”

“What?”

“...it’s hot chocolate. Not tea.”

“Well,” Sirius pauses, tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear. “You like hot chocolate, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“So what’s wrong?”

You clear your throat, realizing that you were probably just imagining things. You focus back on being a babysitter by facing Harry. 

“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong.”

Sirius lets out a scoff after that, and if it weren’t so quiet, you wouldn’t have heard it. 

“Just let it out already if you’ve got something to say.”

At this point, you were just tired. So you don’t snap back at him for the unprovoked command, but you just do as he says—letting out what you have to say.

“I wish you reached out to me more,” You tell him, feeling defeated while you’re watching over Harry. “This is the first time we’ve seen each other in months.”

For a long moment, Sirius is quiet. Like he’s absorbing what you just told him in full detail.

“I’m sorry,” He apologizes. “I didn’t realize…”

“It’s fine,” You chuckle slightly, then sigh. “I know you’re busy.”

“Well, I wasn’t. I just—”

“Forgot about me?”

“No,” Sirius answers you, honest and resolute. “No, never. I just… figured that you were probably busy with your own stuff. ‘Specially after Prongsie’s wedding.”

“Sirius, that was two years ago—”

“And I figured you were probably busy trying to move on back then,” He says, pausing so you could take it in. “I know what it’s like to try and move on from something impossible. Trust me.”

You may not have totally understood what Sirius meant by adding that last bit in, but you do get what he was trying to say at the start.

“I’ve moved on, Sirius. Believe me, I have. I wouldn’t be here babysitting Harry if I haven’t yet.”

He’s silent for a while, probably scrutinizing your face for any sign of fibbing, “Do you want me to believe you?”

“Well, don’t you?” 

“I do. Of course, I do. But I can’t help but feel like you still have something else to say about all… this.” Sirius gestures vaguely to the nursery room.

You sigh, shutting your eyes close for a second. “Why do you want to know, Sirius? It’s not like you’re gaining anything from this.”

A beat passes before he speaks.

“I might not be gaining anything, but I still care about you— let me be cheesy for once,” Sirius quickly adds when you give him a ridiculous look. “So out with it, please.”

So, you let a heavy sigh fall from your lips. Then, you tell him, “It was probably for the best that I didn’t end up with James.”

“I mean,” you continue, setting the mug down beside you. It’s gone lukewarm. “Look at me—I can’t even babysit properly. And James always wanted to have a family. I could never have… fit into that, no matter how much I loved him.”

“So you do love him, still?” Sirius asks you.

“I do. Of course, I do,” You answer honestly. “It’s just—different now, I suppose. I don’t want to be with him anymore, not like that. But I still love him. Like… like a very annoying, very pretentious prat that I unfortunately became friends with.”

You and Sirius share a quiet moment of laughter from that alone, but it’s loud in the sense that you finally feel connected with him after so long.

You throw Harry a short glance to make sure he’s still sleeping before you continue. “So that’s that, basically. I still love James, I don’t wanna kiss him stupid anymore, and I’m now establishing myself as a single-blessed.”

Sirius furrows his eyebrows at that, confused. “You don’t want kids?”

“What, after today? No. Definitely not,” You chuckle softly. But then you look up at him, genuinely curious.

“Wait… do you?”

“Well, I didn’t,” He says, rubbing his thumb against the rim of his mug. “But minds can change, you know? So you never know—”

“Sirius Black, do you want to be a father?” You’re quick to ask him, intrigued now.

He chuckles, caught off guard by your sudden interest in him. “I never said that. Just that nothing’s for certain.”

You narrow your eyes at him, smirking slightly as you gear up to tease him for what he just told you.

“So you’re just gonna sit there and act all shy with me or are you gonna tell me who you’ve been shagging?”

“Christ, Y/N. There’s a baby in the room, mind you.”

You laugh at him, then. Quietly, because you can’t deny the reality of his words. But when you take a quick look at Harry again (he’s still sleeping), Sirius takes a quick look at you.

Like if he looked for longer than he allowed himself, he'll lose track of time.

[sunskisser]

hello ??? oh my god how haven't i found you sooner. your blog is lovely, and you're also a bucky girl?

aaaaah hi beth!! i love your blog it’s so gorgeous <33 and YES bucky is my bf…. bucky should be everyone’s bf…. 😋

[sunskisser]

why do people glare when i make funny faces at their babies 😭😭😭 bro im not gonna kidnap your child

[sunskisser]

rem my baby you will never be a burden <//3

the first fight | 2.38k

final part of two people met once | a remus lupin x fem!reader mini series

summary: under streetlights, and on the sidewalk, you and remus reveal to each other things you didn't know you had in common.

cw/tags: heavy angst, curse words, reader and remus get into a slightly heated argument, reader-centric pov, and inspired, again, by one day (the series). lmk if i missed any <3

taglist: @jamesweather @loveyouprongs

note: this part in particular was also inspired by anything at all (stripped) by julip and party 4 u by charli xcx <3 also i kinda feel bittersweet abt this series ending finally like is that weird <///3 hope u enjoy!

You’ve always been praised for your patience. 

“Remus, stop.”

But you had heard enough of the mansplaining.

“I–I was gonna, anyway....” He stutters, flustered by your interjection.

“No, just— just stop.”

And so he does stop, but you don’t start talking afterwards. Not right away, at least. You’re too busy searching his face for an answer to your question: what was the fucking point of all this?

You take a deep breath before you ask, “Remus, what do you want from me?”

“Nothing,” he answers you, honest-sounding.

A scoff leaves your lips as you roll your eyes. “Bullshit.”

“It’s… it’s not bullshit.”

“No, it is! It is, Remus,” You emphasize, taking one step closer to him subconsciously. You take two steps back to remind yourself of the matter at hand. “You just don’t realize it.”

“Alright, so—” The pitch in his voice goes a little higher, almost like he’s trying not to cry. “So help me then.”

You poke your tongue in your cheek, mulling the thought over. Did you really want to spoon feed Remus his own mistakes? His own bullshit that he claims isn’t really bullshit? 

Eventually, you come to a decision. You’ll take the reins of this conversation and steer it accordingly to your will.

“Alright, fine! We’ll be… at work. We’ll be in a briefing, in the breakroom, hell— even in the bloody elevator. And then I’ll be glancing around and suddenly— I see you giving me ‘the eye’ like the broody dog you are.”

You chest heaves up and down, catching your breath after spilling out what you had been repressing for so long. Probably since you and Remus started this thrilling yet toxic dance of tango. A dance you should have refused a long, long time ago if only you knew it’d turn out like this.

“I’m—” Remus sighs heavily, eyes closing for a brief moment before glancing back up at you. “I’m not broody.”

“No, you are!” Your voice rises. He flinches, and for a split second, you almost feel bad. 

You gulp, your throat suddenly feeling dry. But you continue, “And you always call me or text me in the middle of the night, and I do come over— I don’t deny that, but then I’m out of your place just like that—” You snap your fingers to prove your point. 

And as you continue to speak, your eyes never leave his face. “No small talk, no good morning’s or leftovers for breakfast. We—” You interrupt yourself with humorless laughter. “We just fuck around and do nothing after.”

Admittedly, but not aloud, you’re starting to feel a bit cruel in front of Remus. Cruel, because you’ve done all this talking and he only got to respond with a few words in his defense. While they clearly pissed you off, you’ve always told yourself to fight fair fights. But this fight particularly did not seem fair from Remus’ place.

“But isn’t that what you want?” He finally speaks after a heavy moment of silence. “To do nothing with me?”

A knot forms between your brows at his accusatory tone. “That isn’t what I said—”

“In fact,” Remus cuts you off, gaining new confidence stemming from, perhaps, his quiet anger. “Why do you bother coming over? Why do you answer all my calls and texts?”

You’re caught off guard with this sudden burst of his. For a moment, all you do is stare at him, and all he does is stare back with a resentful sort of look on his face. 

So before you respond, you take a deep breath in, and let it out softly, calming yourself. There’s no use in fighting if you’re both going to stay angry at each other.

“Think about that question for a minute.” You say, voice considerably lower in volume than earlier. “Why do you think I still do all those things in spite of your behavior, Remus?”

The man in question exhales through his nose. “I know what you’re trying to get at, but it isn’t true.”

You shut your eyes momentarily, sighing in exasperation. “I want you to say what you think, Rem. So say it.” 

All of a sudden, gone is the frustration on his face. Instead, Remus struggles, saying, “Y/N, it can’t possibly be true—”

“You know—” You pause because your voice is starting to shake. 

“All this time…” A crack in your voice, now smaller-sounding. “Ever since uni, I thought that I was the only one who felt something. Like what we had… was leading up to something...” 

Your pacing in speech slows down significantly. As if, somehow, the unshed tears in your eyes were weighing heavily down on your shoulders. 

“But then you started being off and distanced and I thought you didn’t like me anymore,” You continue. “And I just went with whatever you wanted to do just for the sake of us staying together.

“But if only I had known that we’d end up like this? Just as stunted, just as distant…” You trail off, glancing up at him and feeling pathetically helpless. 

You chuckle, albeit a bit sarcastically. “Honestly, Remus, I’m tired.”

“This is exactly what I was afraid of happening. So I left. But I know that it wasn’t the right thing to do at the time. So I’m sorry.”

Under your breath, you mutter, “That doesn’t justify everything you did to me. I was hurting, Rem. And I… I missed you so much.” 

“What?” He asks in quiet disbelief.

“You heard me right. I know you aren’t deaf. I did miss you—“

“No. It’s just… you should be mad at me.” he eventually decides to say.

“I am.” 

“You should resent me.” 

“I do.” 

“You shouldn’t even be talking to me right now.” 

“I shouldn’t,” You admit honestly, a teary smile on your face. But then it crumples as you fight back the waterworks. 

“So help me understand why I still am. Because I am so unbelievably tired of this, Remus—” Unfortunately, you could only handle so much all at once. The tears finally come running down your cheeks, and you hurry to cover your weeping face from Remus’ eyes. 

You sniffle, sob, and try your hardest to sober up. “I’m sorry…”

When you look back up at him, he’s closer to you than he was just a few seconds ago. Almost as if he had anticipated himself to do something about your crying… like hug you, amongst other things.

But he was just standing there, with a face so overcome with guilt, heartache, and helplessness all at once. So with another deep breath in, you let your eyes shut close again for a brief moment. Gaining momentum to speak again, you open your eyes—

“I was scared, okay?” Remus tells you, voice sounding just as broken as yours was. “I was afraid that you’d see how pathetic I was that you’d end up leaving me, anyway. And I didn’t want that, so I made things easier for myself—” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You plead weakly.

Almost instantly, your eyes well up with fresh tears all over again. But the sobs don’t take over you. The tears just… make your vision blurry over time until they drop, leaving proof of your desperation running down your face.

Tears of desperation… for Remus to prove himself to you once more. Maybe even for the last time.

Remus’ shaky exhale makes you return your attention to him. He lifts a trembling hand, wiping quickly at the corners of his eyes before flicking the tip of his nose with his pointer finger. A habit he does when he’s anxious about something.

“I didn’t—” He starts, but stops himself for some reason. His eyes squeeze shut before opening again, and now he looks just as tired as you’d always seen him in. “I couldn’t tell you. I… I couldn’t do that to you…”

“Couldn’t do what, Remus? Ask me for help?”

“Be a burden to you,” He answers, the words leaving his mouth like it was a weight he’d been carrying for ages. Remus pauses for a moment, looking away from you, off into the distance, before he returns his gaze to you. 

“You already carry so much, Y/N,” He continues. “And you’ve always carried a lot of things— yourself included, with so much grace and composure. I couldn’t— I told myself I couldn’t ruin that for you. So I did what I did.”

You turn your eyes to the ground, looking at the tips of your shoes. You blink away the tears and let them fall to the ground.

You knew Remus well, even if he might deny that somehow. You knew how he’d rather give his place up for someone else more deserving of it. How he’d rather keep quiet than be honest about whatever mischief his friends were up to. 

But you never knew he’d been feeling like this… to a certain degree.

“And you didn’t think that I wanted to help you, Rem?” His nickname leaves your lips in a broken whisper. If you weren’t careful enough, it might have been lost to the wind. But it seems like Remus hears it.

“N-No, I did—”

“Just be honest. Please.”

You look up at him, and maybe you look a little more pathetic by the second as this conversation progresses. You have this thought in mind, because Remus answers—

“I didn’t.” 

And that’s when you break down crying again. 

“Fuck—” You inhale sharply, trying to repress the oncoming slaught of sobs deep in your chest. You’re restless in your stance, desperate to get sober again for the sake of preserving your pristine image in Remus’ eyes. 

“I loved you so much, did you know that?” You struggle to say in the midst of your anguish. “And— fuck, I still do.” 

A few minutes probably pass in silence while you’re still crying, and Remus is still helplessly watching you. 

It will always go without saying—love hurts. It hurts because of a lot of factors that poets and authors always write about in their creations. For instance, love hurt Orpheus and Eurydice when the former looked back at her while trying to lead her out of the underworld. Love also hurt Romeo and Juliet when they chose their tragic fate blindly, motivated by love.

But in your case? 

Love hurt you because in spite of all the pain Remus had “unintentionally” given you… you held out for him anyway. Loved him, anyway. You ultimately let love be a hurting experience for you because Remus ceased to leave your heart and mind completely.

But you couldn’t have known that love would bring you here—not quite back with him yet, but reunited all the same. 

Your sobs have quieted down in their volume, and you were slightly convinced that at this point, you were just crying out of pity for yourself. Or out of blaming yourself for not noticing Remus’ plight after all these years. The floor drifts in and out hazily in your vision. You’re desperate to stop crying, but you can’t stop the tears from falling.

Until you feel arms wrap around you slowly, hesitantly. Like someone’s trying to shield you from something dangerous but they aren’t sure if they’re doing it right.

“I’m sorry,” Remus breathes into your hairline. You squeeze your eyes shut again, fresh tears running down your cheeks. “I’m sorry…”

By then, your hands go on autopilot—at least, it feels like it—wrapping around Remus’ waist to return the embrace. And you tighten your arms around him as he does the same. Soon enough, you’ve both gone from just embracing to actually holding each other upright—it’s familiar and strange at the same time.

Being in Remus’ arms again after so long, in a manner so tender like this moment...

It feels like walking into the house your childhood belonged to. But now there's strangers treating it like it was always theirs. 

“I still love you, too,” He whispers, sharp and honest. Loud. “I always have.”

You visibly deflate against him, sighing heavily out of relief. You’ve finally managed to stop crying. Now, you’re just holding onto Remus tightly, face buried in his shoulder. You’ve lingered there for so long you’re sure you’ve left tears and snot in his dress shirt. 

But knowing Remus, he probably didn’t mind that.

To look at the bigger picture, there’s more than tears and snot left behind on Remus’ previously pristine dress shirt. There’s unresolved emotions, lots of it. There’s the elephant in the room that’s begging to be addressed—how and why your previous hookups did nothing to improve your relationship. And this list will get longer, without a doubt.

But who knows what the future will have in store for you and him, anyway? There’s always the high chance that Remus will pull back for his sake again, and you’ll be there to pull him back in. Rinse and repeat.

Yet, there’s also the possibility of a different outcome now. You’re not young anymore, but you’re certainly a lot wiser than before. And with Remus holding you—warm, familiar, and caring—you decide right there and then that you were willing to see things out with him. A fresh start of sorts, not just for him, but for the both of you individually.

Life’s too short to dwell on past grievances and hold grudges against ex-somethings, anyway. And love… love will always hurt. There’s no doubting that.

But the thing about life is… it goes on amidst these experiences. Thus, that should be enough reason for you to keep going, too. 

You and Remus stay in each other’s embrace long enough that you start swaying slightly to an imaginary song. There’s no one but the both of you, and the peace and quiet of the night, to witness it.

<- back to series masterlist

[sunskisser]

the set up! <3

[sunskisser]

hellooo my angels! opening requests up for bob reynolds, any of the marauder boys, simon ghost riley, and bucky barnes! and as always feel free to send thoughts in whenever, love you

[sunskisser]

🎰 this one, please!

answered here lovely tally hehe <3

[sunskisser]

For the ask game:

🎰 ⇢ post a screenshot of your current lock screen!

🎧 ⇢ what song (and lyrics) currently resonate with you?

🃏 ⇢ recommend a piece of media you really enjoy!

thank you for the asks chantelle ml 💕

🎰 -> here’s my lock screen! for context, the emojis represent my friend’s and my crushes HAHA and we’re matching 😭😭 and on the upper left, i’ve got my fav oscar wilde quote <3

🎧 -> im thinking ribs by lorde, cos i’m graduating this year and that song reminds me a lot of my friends 🥲

🃏 -> okay well my favourite movie is ‘beautiful boy’ <33 it’s so real and profound in the way it depicts an addict’s struggles, and how it affects your relationships and loved ones too. the acting is done so realistically and i can never not bawl when i think about it ☹️💗

[sunskisser]

HELLO??? WE’VE BEEN MOOTS FOR 10 MONTHS????? what are we gonna name our mutual-ship’s offspring? 🥰🫶🏼

PLEASE omg you're hilarious 😭 and i never realised it's been so long yay <3 !!! i propose bartholomew / guillermo / mercutio / joe

[sunskisser]

₊˚⊹ ask game: slice of life

reblog this post if you want your followers and mutuals to drop emoji in your ask box!

🧶 ⇢ in five words, what were you like as a child? 🎰 ⇢ post a screenshot of your current lock screen! 🥫 ⇢ what (weird) food combinations do you really enjoy? 🔎 ⇢ describe what you are currently wearing! 🌀 ⇢ when was the last time you cried (and why)?  🖇️ ⇢ share three things you are looking forward to! 💎 ⇢ what is something you want but can’t afford? 🗝️ ⇢ describe your day through a timeline! 🏺 ⇢ did you ever steal anything (by accident)? 🌙 ⇢ describe a recent dream you had!  🎧 ⇢ what song (and lyrics) currently resonate with you? 🍵 ⇢ rant about anything that has been on your mind lately! 🩹 ⇢ what is the last thing you broke by accident?  🎬 ⇢ rate the last movie you watched in a theater from 1 - 10! ⏳ ⇢ what embarrassing memory would you like to forget?  🔒 ⇢ who do you consider your favorite person and why? 🃏 ⇢ recommend a piece of media you really enjoy! 🧦 ⇢ what’s something you lost and never found again?  ✂️ ⇢ describe what your hair currently looks like!  🥣 ⇢ what do you usually have for breakfast?

[sunskisser]

everything i need in a fic…. remus lupin….. protective remus lupin….. angsty remus lupin……

because of force | 2.5k

part two of two people met once | a remus lupin x fem!reader mini series

summary: remus has always dreaded social gatherings. but when you’re in company, he finds it hard to say no. it also turns out that that applies to a lot of things in life. for instance, the liquid luck that is alcohol, and most of all, you.

cw/tags: implicit nsfw themes, sexual assault, but nothing too graphic. heavy angst, remus is an implied alcoholic, remus-centric pov, jealous!remus lupin, and inspired, again, by one day (the series). lmk if i missed any <3

taglist: @jamesweather @loveyouprongs

note: omg pt 2 is finally here! and surprise... there's a 3rd part incoming bcoz ive finally gotten around to writing the last scene but it started getting longer... anw, special thanks to @sunskisser and @wintrsoul cuz they had my back when i was losing my mind over writing this lolol enjoy!

Remus Lupin isn’t really a party person. But his friends will tell you otherwise should one have to ask.

He’s not a stranger to them, either. Everyone has gone to a party at least once in their lives, no matter how reserved or “shy” that person may be. If anything, he was often dragged into whatever party Sirius felt like throwing at the worst possible time back in uni. Remus was in attendance at these parties, but was always the wallflower. Just watching from the sidelines, a Solo cup in hand, and making judgy comments in his mind.

That routine got disrupted whenever he spotted you, of course. 

You weren’t a wallflower like him, though. You were there for the free food and drinks. And even though Remus preferred to just let people go about their business, lest his business be invaded, he left his comfort zone just to get to you. 

“Scavenging for snacks again?” He’d ask you.

You had chuckled, your laughter ringing in his ears like wind chimes dancing in the breeze. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Remus hated small talk. But he never minded it when it was with you.

Similar to his past, the man still gets dragged into public gatherings nowadays. Though they’re a great deal tamer than the parties he’s been to when he was younger. Now, he gets dragged to team dinners—clinking pints of Guinness, sharing finger foods with colleagues, and pretending that they all make for some great company (though Remus would rather fill his mouth with dirt than admit that to anyone).

Thankfully, it only happens every once in a while. Most days at the office are mundane and repetitive. Not even the occasional elevator run-ins Remus has had with you can deny that. So, if anything, he has a love-hate relationship with attending team dinners.

It gives him the chance to see his colleagues in a different light—literally. Because the lighting at the office is cool and creepy, and the pubs that these dinners take place in have warm lighting, making one feel at ease. 

It also gives Remus a chance to drink himself dry with a perfectly reasonable excuse. That’s either to “let loose!” or “have fun!” like all his colleagues nag him about. Who was he to deny the decisions that other people make for him? He barely speaks with them, too, and he wasn’t about to start denying anything now. So—

“—bottoms up!”

Remus downs his shot glass of gin, feeling the familiar burn of alcohol running down his throat. A resounding applause goes around him. He’s just succumbed to what might be his third—or forth?—shot ever since truth-or-dare was brought up at the table. 

They’d just asked him if there was anyone special in his life right now. Remus only ever had one automatic answer for that. A namehe’d answer in a heartbeat if he were around different people, in a different setting. Of course, he could always just tell them it was Sirius the rockstar or James the athlete and make up a sob story on the spot.

But he took a shot, because he wasn’t willing to bullshit anyone right now.

Not while he was busy playing his own game of ‘Try Not to Be Triggered’ with you at the moment.

The entire point of this dinner was for a “morale boost,” or so the new guy on the team, Gale, had reasoned a while ago at the office. “Drinks on me!” he said, but even an infant could see right through his friendly facade—he was just trying to get on everybody’s good side and rise up to the top that way.

…or so Remus thinks.

It certainly doesn’t help him that you're sitting right beside him—or was it the other way around? He couldn’t tell anymore; he’s getting another drink with a bigger glass later, Remus decides then. Ever since the team came into the pub and sat at the table, you and Gale had stuck out to him like a sore thumb. 

The pair of you were giggling like high school lovebirds, whispering in each other’s ears, sharing knowing smiles and glances. It all made Remus want to hurl, respectfully speaking. It took an ounce of self-restraint not to roll his eyes and make faces.

Because Remus isn’t petty like that. He wasn’t jealous either. 

How could he be if it didn’t concern him that you have a new fling going on with some fresh upstart now? It’s not like you were his girlfriend or anything. 

But that was never really the case in the beginning, was it? It never mattered if you were his girlfriend or… anything.

All that ever mattered to Remus was that you had him, and he had you. Whether that be in the happy times, in the sad times, in times of desire neither of you could quench indefinitely—you were important to him. You still are important to him.

He turns his attention to the window, watching the people and the cars pass by like they always did. Your laughter rings in his ears like an uncomfortable pitch, but they don’t harm his eardrums. Instead, it makes his heart feel heavier than it did before while he was still downing shot after shot. 

The thing is, though, you’re not the only one laughing at the table. The whole team is. It’s just that Remus has learned over time how to become in tune with your singularity. And it’s come to the point that he knows how to pick your voice out of any background noise anywhere. 

A shame that he isn’t willing to tell that to you or anyone else, though.

…but with another drink, he might.

・・・・・

Remus is protective. 

That stretches out to a lot of things in his life: his privacy, his friends, his vulnerability, and so on. And if he was being honest, he prides himself for being protective. It gives him the peace of mind he’ll never not crave.

But he only ever becomes a different kind of protective—namely, being overprotective—when it concerns you.

An hour or so has passed since the team got settled into the pub. The table’s a mess now with empty dishes, half-drunk glasses, alcohol spillage, and pieces of chips left over for the ants to feast on. Half the team has bid their farewells and gone home in pairs and groups, but several have decided to stick behind.

Several people including Remus, you, and Gale.

Gale, who’s drunk off his arse, was clinging on to you like some desperate puppy.

You, on the other hand, were busy trying to refuse him politely 

And Remus… he sat at the bar with a glass full of cider to keep him company.

But he’s been keeping an eye on you and Gale ever since the latter had started to slur his words and sway in his seat. And, mind you, Remus has seen his fair share of instances where creeps bother innocent people. He recognizes the signs, but hasn’t exactly been presented with a reasonable chance yet to swoop in and save you from Gale the creep.

That is, until he clocks on to Gale’s hand reaching up to your face.

Remus has done that one himself before, but tenderly and gently.

Gale does it with force.

“No, stop. Please—” You tell him, now actively resisting his advances. Remus downs the rest of his glass’ contents and places it back down onto the bar. 

“Oh, c’mon,” Gale slurs, keeping a tight arm around your shoulders and stillforcing you to face him. “A little kiss won’t hurt, eh?”

The foot of a stool drags loudly against the wooden floor of the pub. It’s loud, even amidst the usual noise of a fairly full pub, and it catches yours and Gale’s attention. He lets out a frustrated sigh, his grip on your face loosening as he turns his head—

“What are you doing?” Remus asks him, his voice low and serious. He’s got a hand behind both of your chairs, ready to pull Gale’s back and take him to the floor.

Gale scoffs, sizes him up, then rises to his full height. But even in his stance, Remus is a great deal taller—has been his whole life, basically, though it doesn’t seem to bother the former. In fact, he still has the audacity to come up to him in his face, staring him in the eyes. 

Remus gets a horrid whiff of his breath—like Gale had just gargled beer a few times. Not that far off from Remus, who was just sipping on cider earlier, but at least he knows how to keep his mouth shut when talking with another person. 

“What’s it look like I’m doing, hm?” Gale shoots back, taunting. “I was jus’ tryin’ to give ‘er a kiss.”

‘Kiss my arse, more like,’ Remus comments mentally. 

But he takes a glance back at you first, still seated in your chair and looking tense. Your eyes meet his, and you shake your head resolutely. Remus takes it as a sign to go on, but he has a slight feeling that that wasn’t what you were trying to tell him.

“She says no,” He finally replies, voice still low but still keeping composure. “Actually—she’s been saying no.”

“Wow. You been watching us this whole time or somethin’? Fuckin’ nasty li’l kink you got there—”

As soon as the words had left his mouth, it was safe to say that Gale knew better than to anger Remus Lupin.

・・・・・

Remus does not consider himself a saint. 

It’s just that he doesn’t resort to violence, even with a hot head. So when he muttered a few words of “wisdom” saved just for Gale’s ears, it had surprisingly prevented the situation from escalating.

The creep had left the pub then, stumbling over his feet and rushing to pay the tab for the team dinner’s expenses. That was what he was there for, Remus had reminded him. Perhaps the guy just needed a “strong” wake-up call. One that involved bringing up the HR manager and some other well-meaning threats.

But where Gale got his much-needed slap back to reality, Remus got his from you walking out of the pub in a hurry.

“Y/N—wait!”

It all happens in a blur. Had it not been for the alcohol running through his veins since a couple hours ago, Remus would have stuck behind and returned to his cider. Instead, he had grabbed his coat, paid for his drink, and went out of the pub, rushing after you with his crossbody bag half-slung over his shoulder. 

No time like the present, Remus thought.

“Y/N, please—” He pleads again, jogging after you, nearly closing the distance. Actually, it didn't take much work considering Remus’ height. But never mind the actual, physical distance—you’re still walking away from him, and he’s still following you.

“You didn’t have to do that,” You finally spoke, shaking your head. “I had it under control.”

“‘Under control?’” Remus repeats indignantly. “That’s bollocks, and you know it.”

You scoff, sparing him a brief glance over your shoulder. “What’s bollocks is you not minding your own business.”

“Well it might not have been my own business, but you needed help. I was the only one who saw that.” At this, you stop walking, startling Remus just slightly as he almost bumps into you. 

You turn around to face him, arms crossed and face hardened. “And now what, huh? D’you want me to say ‘thank you?’”

“What? No, I—” 

“Y’know what? Forget it. I’m not having this conversation. Not while you’re like this.” There’s a certain finality in your tone that scares Remus, and the fear amplifies when you turn away from him and start walking again.

“Like what?” He asks, exasperated and admittedly, tired of this conversation. He’s not sure anymore why he’s still following you. “Will you just listen to me, please?” 

“Oh, I am very much listening. In fact, I’m so interested in whatever you have to tell me right now,” You tell him, voice heavy with sarcasm. Remus winces. “So just keep talking.”

And because he knows better than to fight against your words, Remus does talk. He starts with apologizing, otherwise known as the best way he knows how to start a conversation, or introduce himself. 

“Okay, I’m sorry I stepped in, alright?” He admits. “I know that it didn’t concern me, but had it been another girl in your place—”

You interject with a humorless chuckle, “Oh, you and your hypotheticals.”

But Remus continues to speak for himself, anyway. Yes, he knows better than to fight against you—but he won’t let the argument go without establishing common ground. Moreover, this stubbornness that Remus doesn’t realize he has is what bound him to the most important people of his life in the first place. 

With his parents, he was stubborn in the sense that he kept reassuring them that he’d be fine. That the pain of his illness didn’t hurt him as much as it hurt to see them grow wrinkles on their faces, earned from constantly worrying for their son.

With his friends, Remus was stubborn in the sense that he really tried his best to be a good influence to them amidst their troublemaking. But alas, he ended up being an unlikely accomplice to their foolishness back in high school.

With you…, it seems that Remus was stubborn in the sense that given his experiences, his observances, his knowledge of you—he knew better than to ruin what was already perfect in the first place.

So as he rambles on about where he might have gone wrong at the pub earlier, still keeping pace with you walking in front of him, Remus never dares to question the very essence of this entire conversation. 

Why were you mad at him? Why would you say you had it under control when you were clearly uncomfortable with Gale earlier? And, most importantly, why haven’t you told Remus to get out of your sight yet and just hail a cab ride home?

He’d really like to know the answers to his questions, but alas—

“Remus, stop.”

He nearly bumps into you again, having been so focused on getting his point across in the mess that is his internal dilemma and this entire situation with you. It is also now that Remus realizes that you’ve both reached a quieter part of town, a considerably far distance from the pub now. 

The warm orange emitting from the streetlights coats you and him in that sunlight sort of hue. The kind that you only get to bask in when you’re by the sea, watching the sun go down beneath the vast expanse of water. 

But even in this light, Remus feels like he should be shivering under your glare right now.  

You’ve finally turned back around to face him.

<- back to series masterlist | next part ->

[sunskisser]

💌 send this to the twelve nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart and if you get five back you must be pretty awesome!! 💌

PS: I ADORE your theme omggg!

AWW thank you so much sky i love you!! also how have you been it’s been forever ☹️💕

[sunskisser]

omg chantelle i love this! need me a remus rn ☹️

hi angel! can i request for 🍧 Sweet like Honey — remus lupin comforting reader when she’s had a bad day <3

hope i did this right!

Of course you did it right my love, thank you for requesting!

Chantelle's Birthday Bash

Remus can sense it the moment you walk into the room—the slump of your shoulders, the way you avoid eye contact, how quiet your "hi" is. He doesn't press. Just opens his arms and waits. You don't even need to say anything; he always knows.

He pulls you into a hug that lasts longer than usual, the kind where he rubs soft circles into your back and rests his chin on your head like he's anchoring you to something safe.

His voice drops even softer when you're like this—gentle reassurances in your ear, things like, "You don't have to be okay right now," and "You're allowed to fall apart a bit, love. I'll hold the pieces."

Once he's sure you feel a little less fragile, he sets about making the world softer—lights dimmed, kettle on, a blanket draped over your lap. There's always tea involved. Sometimes cocoa. Always honey.

He never demands an explanation. But if you do want to talk, he listens in that rare, undivided way he has. Like every word matters. Like you matter.

If it's an especially bad day, he'll read to you. You curled against his side, his voice low and steady, thumbing the pages as if each sentence could stitch something in you back together.

He knows all your tells—the fidgeting, the way your gaze goes distant—and finds subtle ways to ground you. His hand finding yours. Knees touching. The occasional press of his lips to your temple like punctuation marks to silence.

He doesn't tell you to "cheer up." He says things like, "You don't have to be anything for me. You're already enough."

After you've calmed down, he'll convince you to go for a walk if you're up for it. The kind with no destination, just you, him, and the moon. Quiet company, steady footsteps, stars overhead.

When you finally fall asleep (usually curled into his chest, his jumper smelling like old books and safety), he stays awake a bit longer. Just watching you breathe. As if to say, I've got you. You can rest now.

[sunskisser]

If you get a star ⭐️ in your inbox. It means your moot appreciates you, and your efforts in the community. Send this to 10 mutuals to continue the love! <3

thank youuu my darling lily ily ☹️❤️

[sunskisser]

If you get a star ⭐️ in your inbox. It means your moot appreciates you, and your efforts in the community. Send this to 10 mutuals to continue the love! <3

awhh thank you rese ily 😭🫶 !!!

[sunskisser]

CONGRATULATIONS ON 1K HONEY!!! So proud of you!! You deserve this and so so so much more!! 😩🫶🏻🫶🏻🥰🥰

awhh thank you so much della <333 love you sweet girl!! 🫶