superdooperredhot-blog - Tumblr blog

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Hate mine. Can't sleep, thank you very much.

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Can't I just go to sleep like a normal person?

For fuck's sake? Classes start at 8am. Alarm goes off at 6am. I've been on a sleep schedule for 3 damn weeks and tonight of all nights my brain won't shut off and my meds told me to fuck off. Thank you very much bipolar, ADHD, OCD...and whatever else. Nerves, excitement. Argh!!!!!!! Shit! Fuck! God damn it! Sleep! I need you for once! I have 5 weeks of hell about to land in my lap. I hate my disease tonight.

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Um. Yep. The big boobs, phat ass, beautiful eyes & hair, got me NOWHERE. Thank you life. You totally suck donkey balls.

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Seriously. What the fucking fuck. I can't even print off the forms online?? Fuck you government assholes. Oh, I can't even GO IN TO PICK UP THE FORMS EITHER??? You closed at NOON TODAY??? Triple fuck your mother in the ass with a carton of pall mall stale ass cigs and a baboon's fist. You Marxist controlling bureaucratic pigs.

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*ETA: This is not a question someone asked me, nor is it how I personally feel. This is a quote taken from a blog I follow.* In terms of medicated vs not, who is the “real” you? have you struggled with taking medication because you feel it alters who you are? “Taking medication to calm down and be normal just assures me if I do change it would be an artificial me, and that I’ll always be this ugly thing deep down”, This is a quote from an ask I received recently. What is your opinion on this line of thinking?

I follow Frack (edited) Yeah Bipolar Owl, and this was on my dash the afternoon. 

My response was: When you’re manic you’re all over the place. When you’re depressed you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders. With BP how can you ever know who you truly are when you’re constantly changing? I like being medicated because it gives me the chance to discover who I am.

(via bipolarandmarried)

In response to this post, I would say...

It takes a combo of good doctors and good research by you, the patient, (crazymeds.us has invaluable and data from various resources), along with journaling or using a mood tracker (iMood Tracker is a good one), to really truly find the path to the BEST version of a YOU that you and those around you FEEL is acceptable. Not just a "numb to the world" version.

The problem I see most with bipolars is, we want off our meds when we feel stable OR when we feel nothing...usually it seems because we have lost touch with our "highs", the safe ones. The highs or lets call them the good days that the "normals" envy. The parts of our personality that everyone USED TO describe us as immediately. Fun, happy, outgoing, easy to talk to, etc.

So, finding the meds that will allow those days to still exist, within reason, is what I feel, is key to a bipolar's success on medication.

So far, I've found that by staying away from weight gainers and I'm on topamax, lamictil and geodon. :)

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I love this post!!!

Hey sorry for the last 50 posts that were all bipolar owl memes. Im not sorry at all they are prefect, if you don’t like it then fuck you up your probably mentally stable ass. 

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When the mania force is too strong!!!

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My dog is pretty cool...

My meds knocked me out by 11:30 last night, and during his last potty break he chased a cat (so no tinkle). He waited all the way till this morning at 10:30 to potty (four tinkles!!!). My yorkie wouldn't have done that. I'd be stepping and sleeping in puddles.

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Meds, you win some, you lose some. Eventually you find the right cocktail...or a cockatiel, or a cock with no tail. Whatever works.

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My phone is full of them as well. It's how I explain my "quirks" to others, and laugh about my illness with friends and family.

Oh is it obvious I’m obsessed? And have no life

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I

In case you haven’t heard

TODAY IS THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF FUCKYEAHBIPOLAROWL.

“Who announces and celebrates the anniversary of a blog? Like seriously Dev, get a life.” Someone somewhere is murmuring negatively. And to that I say

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This!!

finals.

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How do you break the news?

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This seriously made me lol!!!!

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Finals week is here. Studying all night is easy. I get pleasure watching the "normals" complain.

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This was the right one. Damn it. I don't want to retype my post. I'm still learning this thing. Fuck the ER. Record all the conversations. They lie about everything.

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Yes. This really happened. Fucking asshole God complex ER doctor. Once you are labeled as an "at risk" or a "depressed" patient, YOU ARE FUCKED if you need any medical care outside of YOUR doctors. And they will call your doctors, but good luck getting them to tell them what ACTUALLY happened/ is happening. I will learn to heal my own cuts, scrapes, set my own bones, deal with a fever...anything short of a car accident. Hopefully I won't be driving. Otherwise I will say, RECORD ANY AND ALL CONVERSATIONS, I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO NOT TRUST ANY OF YOU FUCKERS WHO ASSUME THE WORST EVEN ON A DAY I AM HAPPILY ALIVE.