#◈ // ❛ those who share a common goal will often find solace in one another.

[attack-on-kiwi]

Hi! I really enjoy your writing and your characterization. Could I please request the rest of the fluff alphabet for post-timeskip Reiner? (whichever point is easiest for you to write from)

Check my master list for letters F, H, N, & R!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

There isn’t much Reiner genuinely likes doing. He’s more than happy to just take part in whatever activities his s/o wants to do. At this point he doesn’t feel like he’s allowed to have an opinion or have any strong wants. This does bother his s/o, so they need to try and coax an answer from him.

They find out he enjoys going for walks. Reiner specifically likes going on long hikes where no other people are around. Sure, he enjoys walking around the marketplace, but there’s always a pressure that he’s going to be cut down at any given moment. Therefore, private hikes are more his scene. He’s able to relax and will be more willing to open up to his s/o during these hikes. 

If he had to pick another activity, it would be training together. He’d want to do something physical, such as sparring because it gives him an easy and familiar way to tease them in a more lighthearted manner, such as play wrestling. It’s one of the few times his s/o gets to see Reiner act his age and not put up walls. 

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Resilience. The fact that his s/o is able to push through being with someone like him and still see the good in this terrible world has him weak. He feels undeserving of someone so good, but he’s too attached to even consider letting them go. 

To Reiner, their laugh is the most reassuring and calming sound. No matter if their laugh is a gentle chime or a crashing wave, he can’t get enough of it. He swears to himself whenever he makes them laugh, he falls more deeply in love with them than he thought could be possible. 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Reiner wouldn’t really know where to start. His mind is racing with thoughts such as “Is there an attack?” and “Did they get hurt?”. He lacks tact when calming them down, gripping their shoulders and forcing them to look at him as he near demands them to spill what’s going on. When that doesn’t work, he tries to rethink his approach. He’ll breathe and calm himself before smoothing his palms over their arms and gently asking them what’s wrong. 

He’ll hug them tightly and wait as they relax. Whether they just cling to him until their breathing calms or they ride out their panic, he’s pressed his lips to the top of their head, mumbling “everything is fine” even if he doesn’t believe it himself.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Reiner, like other warriors, doesn’t entertain the idea of having a future. This man has already resigned himself to the idea that he will be dead within a few years, so what is the point of him imagining a future? 

If he could have his way, he’d want a family. At least one child. Though, he wonders if his child would need a friend since he has no siblings that could provide cousins. Maybe two children, then, so they don’t get lonely. He thinks about how he wants a small, comfortable home away from the bustling of the towns. The seaside sounds ideal. Sometimes he imagines what it would feel like to have those children tucked between him and his partner while he told them exaggerated stories of the animals that lived in the forests. 

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s physically dominant when it comes to most situation. He’ll put himself before his s/o and make sure they are always in his view. When it comes to intimacy, he teeters between being timid and overbearing. It’s difficult for him to find a balance between wanting to be careful and wanting to have his s/o to himself, and they often find him coming on too strong then becoming reclusive for a few moments after due to the fear of having possibly crosses a boundary. 

Reiner sees himself as a natural guardian, so it’s only to be expected that he takes on more traditionally protective roles.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Reiner is extremely touched that his s/o would stay with a coward such as himself. He thanks them often and brings them gifts. Most of the time it’s food that would otherwise be difficult for them to get their hands on. 

He has a hard time getting out of his head but is able to see that his work and attitude does affect his s/o to a degree and tries to be as mindful as possible. Most times, this mindfulness is chalked up to a simple, “I don’t know what I’d do without you” which needs to be interpreted depending on the context of the situation and his emotional state.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

His s/o grounds him, but they haven’t made huge steps in affecting his personality. He is lost and needs to figure out how to depend on others, and unfortunately, he’s unable to do so credibly at the moment. His s/o hopes Reiner will one day be able to share his burdens with them, even if just a little bit. Reiner definitely teaches them to be patient. 

On the other hand, Reiner is happy to help them overcome their fears. He’s always got a solution and steps to help them get to their goals.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Yes. He’s insecure and is easily provoked by other people giving his s/o attention. If he sees them giving others intimate attention, he will become extremely suspicious and angry. Reiner tries to ignore it since he doesn’t want to cause a scene. Image is important to warriors, after all. He does cling to them more as he tries to calm himself, often holding their hands or hugging them close in private.

If he’s in a situation where he is allowed to make a move, he’s more than willing to use physical force to scare off anyone he sees as trying to get with his s/o.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Reiner’s a good kisser when it comes down to it. His kisses are hot and nearly suffocating. He always has a strong hand behind his partner’s head and another firmly on their back pressing them into him as deep as he can. His skin is warm and being so close to him increases that heat. 

His first kiss with his partner was desperate. Whether it was during an episode back in Paradis or when he got back home, his s/o found him uncharacteristically quiet. Serious. 

Their voice surprised him, causing him to jump as they made their presence known. It was an unusual sight- to see Reiner hunched in on himself. When they got close enough to sit next to him and ask what was going on, he simply told them that he wanted to kiss them at least once since he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to again. After their initial shock, his soon to be s/o agreed, letting him take lead. Reiner licked his lips and placed one hand gently behind their neck while the other rested on their thigh. He leaned ver, finally inviting them to his lips and as the two sought one another’s touch, he found himself pinning them down and nearly unclothing them. Whether his s/o allowed it to continue or stopped is up for debate.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Reiner would never consider confessing.

He would need to be near death or in an extremely stressful and dire situation to blurt it out. 

That, or during more recent manga events, Reiner would try to find a moment of peace where he and his s/o could speak in private. During a conversation where he finally explains his past, he would likely refuse to make eye contact and stare at their feet. His voice is shaking slightly as he steels himself for whatever the outcome may be. It’s his s/o who turns his cheek to look him in the eye, confessing they are in love with him. It’s overwhelming and as he’s embraced by them, he reciprocates it over and over in shaky whispers that are muffled by their neck. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He likes the idea of marriage. Being with someone who is completely his and building a life together that’s peaceful and without pressure would mean the world to him. 

Reiner’s proposal is private. It would be during camp before the climatic battle. One evening, he’d take his s/o to a private area and reminisce their experiences together. He’s unsure why he’s bringing it up until his s/o asks what he wants to do after they win. He’s taken aback, wanting to say there’s not much left for him once the world is saved. “Will you marry me, Reiner?”

Reiner’s heart stops at that moment. It’s not a proposal, more so it’s just gauging his desires. He can’t help but nod. If they survive, even if he has little time left, he wants to spend it with them.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Reiner’s love is subtle. It’s not common for people in Marley to outright be romantic in public, so displays are limited. Though at some point when he was younger he would have taken great pride in being overly affectionate in front of others, he now takes solace in being a quiet and helpful lover. It’s difficult for him to really express his love verbally, so he takes action. He’s good with fixing appliances, running errands, and comforting them in private. To most others, it seems Reiner is distant with his s.o, but this is untrue.

He’s skilled in loving them. His holds are firm and comforting. His kisses are deep and true. His actions express his care more accurately than his words ever could. The way he puts himself before them is in itself his ultimate display of love. 

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Reiner prefers to keep his romantic involvement private due to fear for his s/o’s safety. Being Involved with him makes them a target which is something he’s unwilling to look past. This does not mean he is ashamed of them by any means. 

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

His hugs are all consuming. Something about being in his embrace helps wash away all anxiety. It’s truly difficult for his s/o to be upset for long when they’re in his hold. This becomes especially useful during high stress events, and it helps Reiner calm down.  

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Reiner’s focus isn’t on helping his s/o achieve any goals. His fixation is his mission to save humanity, so he doesn’t actually think too much about if his s/o has any goals they wan to achieve.

If his s/o shares a desire with him, he’s happy to help them map out a plan of attack. There’s not much he can do in ways of helping them if it doesn’t pertain to training or military affairs since most of his time is dedicated to his work. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Reiner prefers having a routine above all else. With how erratic his life is, a sense of peace is important to him. He suffers from PTSD and anxiety among other issues, so knowing where his s/o is during a certain time or having a specific ritual at a certain time every day helps him ground himself. He wouldn’t want to deal with any destructive routines when he has free time. It’s extremely important for him to focus on his healing, so a routine is best.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Reiner... does not know his s/o well. He knows what bothers them and knows about them from what they share. However, he doesn’t make an effort to learn more. He’s got too much on his plate, and the relationship is reliant on the physical intimacy to help each other blow off steam. He could stand to be more emotionally present. It’s something he’s aware of and feels like it’s too late to do anything about it. If he survives, he wants to build a stronger relationship where the two can equally rely on one another for the support that they need.

He’s empathetic to a degree. He listens to their problems and tries to offer the best support he can, but he’s not necessarily equipped to help someone deal with their own problems when he barely has a handle on his own shaky mental state.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Reiner is ridiculously obsessed with keeping his relationship. He knows he’s not the best partner that he could be, but he wants to selfishly keep his s/o because they make him feel human. They make him feel worthy of being alive, and he’s too scared of letting that go for who would he be without a purpose? His mission does come first, but he’d be more than willing to throw himself in front of his s/o if it meant securing their escape. 

He’s a natural protector as mentioned before, and couple that with suicidal tendencies and you have someone that’s problematically self-sacrificial. It’s not a good mixture, but it goes to show how dependent he is on his s/o for a sense of stability and how far he’d go to make sure they were safe. 

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He likes lying face to face when the two are in bed. When Reiner is especially tired, his cheeks and nose flush  a dark pink. It’s always embarrassing when his s/o decides to tease him about it. Don’t you dare call him cute or coo at him because in his tired state he will have no methods of coping. He might even turn around to try and escape their compliments, but if they cling to his back and try to pull him back around, they’re somehow always successful. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Reiner doesn’t kiss often. He does like to hold his s/o’s hands. Clasping their fingers with his own and holding their hand sto his chest in moments of quiet vulnerability will be the most stripped down, vulnerable acts he will ever commit. 

He’s not opposed to his partner kissing him and holding him, he just doesn’t feel worthy of starting the act himself. Once they initiate, he’s more than eager to soak up as much touch as he can. He never wants to let go, meaning they can be in one another’s embrace for hours if they’re lucky.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Reiner is good at compartmentalizing his feelings, so he will run on autopilot and just hope that his s/o is alive so he can see them soon.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

As mentioned earlier, Reiner is more than willing to put his life on the line for his s/o. He would run into a head on attack if it meant giving his loved one a moment longer to breathe. 

[kyukicho]

@dermapyre asked

somehow he is still around. not the same; who could be, after all this; but he brought along the same feeling as did the man dabi met long ago in this shady bar, eyes hidden behind prosthetic but clear with murderous intent if dabi did not give up his name. and in the end it did not even take as long as dabi thought it would; mere weeks. three, maybe. he knows it hasn't been a month, had felt like a heartbeat's duration only when dabi got a hold of shigaraki and treated his injuries. when dabi allowed shigaraki to hold him on that couch, both their bodies so close together.

the first time they'd kissed after emotions ran dry with arguments, insults and vile gestures thrown all around. that very first time dabi felt shigaraki's skin underneath his hands, and heard him moan for him; the time he decided he'd call him tomura, and will allow him to whisper touya in return; touya didn't think much about it, realized with dread later what he had done. what he offered tomura willingly, what part he gave up and which he embraced with fever.

the rest came natural. easy. like breathing, like drifting off to sleep in quiet nights with tomura next to him, warm and with a smile on his lips touya would trace along with a finger first, then add his very own only for a moment.

like moments where touya sits to admire his destruction; tomura both benefactor and destroyer.

whenever tomura took things slightly too far and had to be pulled back gently. let touya do it no problem, accepted kisses with a pout.

it's in between their bodies hidden half from public eye, touya's breath barely audible but the sound of flesh slamming against flesh was loud, so very loud in his ears he could've lost himself, accepted the risk of getting caught with tomura deep inside of him--

natural as their gazes were, meant for the other after days of anxiety and absence.

in the toys touya steals for him. in the sweets he brings in the middle of the night.

in the heat of the moment now more than ever before; when touya pulls away, tastes tomura's tears on his lips and is brought to cup his face as gentle as he can. stroke his cheek, wipe tears of exhaustion, mind and body so very overwhelmed with what touya took from him. it's in crimson eyes that touya sees he doesn't want anything else to happen to him if it cannot be tomura, shared with him, brought upon by him, from him, in spite of him. and perhaps touya simply meant to say he loves him. wants to let tomura know he's cherished. looks good like that. instead he breathes in deep and swears he stopped to think.

"marry me."

So much has changed. A child, lost to the world. Tormented by memories and fighting for survival. Hell bent on destruction, decay, to bring down everything. One who was convinced that everything and everyone was out to stop him. To impede progress or stand in his way. Distrustful of any and all that crossed his path. Wanting almost nothing to do even with his own companions, especially those that stood up to him. One in particular that raised his voice and his destructive hand in defiance. 

From stern voices and slammed doors an image appeared. That same child, lost, forgotten. Staring back at him. Fighting with words and goals and thoughts. Trying his best to shut out the world and his heart. A mirror. How hated what is seen in others that we see in ourselves. How much Tomura wanted to block it out, destroy it. 

How wrong he had been.

Two lost children. Taking their pain and wounds and seeing them, feeling them in one another. Overwhelmed that someone could understand. When no one had, when no one had tried to. 

Finding in those similarities a common solace. A pair of hands that wished not to destroy but to hold. To touch marred skin and make it feel whole again, to touch heart and mind. Make the world a common ground for both of them. A place for them to stand tall as who they were.

Yet there was so much more to that man than just his pain and past. So many more things to cherish, to fall for. Someone who made him laugh until tears stained his cheeks. Who wiped them away, whether from happiness or despair. 

Someone hotheaded, who too often took things into his own hands. Needed to be reminded that he wasn’t alone anymore. That no matter what he had a home to return to. Someone to return to. Who would stand by his side no matter what. No matter the consequences. 

Someone who thought of him, even when so much else was on their minds. Who he thought of too. Made him remember what it was he was now fighting for. Made it so it wasn’t just selfish banter but a goal for others. 

Someone who made him feel. Who shut out the insects in his mind that ate at thoughts and caused his anxieties. That left scars no longer on skin. Who instead of fearing or shying from them cherished every inch of him. Made him feel adored, made him feel needed and reminded him that not everyone turns on him.

Evening sun faded, letting the moon illuminate the dark room. Shimmering the tears in the light and making their figures dance on the walls. Tomura looking through curtain of luminous white hair that stuck to cheeks now held. Stares silently in deepest crimson at the one that holds him. The one he’d grown so much because of. Who’s shown him so much that was missing from his world. Who turned it into theirs.

‘I love you’ He wants to whimper, but words were still finding breath to put to them. Waiting instead for the words that come. Expecting... nothing but getting more than he could have ever imagined. 

Breath shuddered with lips parted. Caught in his chest. Heart that was calming suddenly jolted in its rhythm. Dancing along with silhouettes. He stares, wide eyed and breathless at words that surely were never meant for someone like him. Someone who could only destroy, yet there they were. Clear as night sky on the lips of the one he loved so dearly.

Tears that had ceased regained their steady pooling. Shivering hands finding hold of chest, clinging as tight as four fingers could. “You... You’re serious? Me?” He didn’t need something official to know he loved him but hearing those words made him want it none-the-less. 

“Yes, fucking hell, yes!”

[aguidetointerculturaldating]

How to: Adapt to a Foreign Country as a Couple

By Zoe Delgado & Karolina Janas

(photo credits: https://pixabay.com/photos/airport-transport-woman-girl-2373727/)

A challenge

Up until this point, we have talked to you about intercultural dating with the assumption that you and your partner are from different cultures. But what about when you’re from the same culture, and the circumstances lead to your relationship being influenced and shaped by forces from another?

For example, moving to a different country can sometimes have a big impact on your relationship – perhaps only one of you is familiar and comfortable with the culture, only one speaks the language, or the situation prioritises specifically the needs of one person, and not the other. A (rather extreme) illustration of this is the case of trailing spouses. They are (most often) women, who follow their husbands to another country so that they can pursue job opportunities. Researchers Schnurr, Zayts and Hopkins talk about how the move can often force women to significantly change their lives by letting go of their career, regardless of how successful they were in their home country.

In such situations, one person in a relationship can develop strong dependency on another, who is more interculturally competent. This term can refer to what the person knows about the host culture, which helps them mediate more effectively any potential difficulties arising from intercultural communication, and, consequently, integrate more smoothly into the society. This is an example of when being more/less interculturally competent can become significant, and have an effect on the power dynamics in your relationship. Having to rely on your partner when interacting with the host culture (e.g. needing them to translate for you in everyday situations), may be an obstacle for your autonomy. Clearly, this scenario has the power to drastically transform your relationship. And so, how should we deal with such difficulties?

Support systems

Moving to an entirely new country is, of course, extremely daunting, and it will undoubtedly take time to adjust. This process of adapting to the new environment and changing previously internalised cultural patterns is known as acculturation; those who undergo this process can experience acculturative stress. Some migrants often find solace in surrounding themselves with a support system to combat this stress; usually a support system is co-created by people in similar situations, and often with people from the same home-country. Maria*, a Filipina who moved to the UK with her husband, found it difficult when first arriving in the UK, and experienced a sort of culture shock. Although she met some of her neighbours, and became friends with them, she still found it difficult to adapt to the host country, and it was not until she built her own community with other Filipinos that she felt more comfortable and began to acculturate better. She said “it’s different like if you’ve got some people with a common bond. It’s a common bond because you’re a Filipino, […] we can relate better”. With this support from a new community, acculturation may seem less overwhelming, and can help you feel better equipped to integrate in the host country.

Settling down and starting a family

Perhaps once you have adapted more to the culture and become more comfortable with the sociocultural reality in which you live, you might start thinking about starting a family with your spouse. Raising children is hard enough as it is, but bringing up children in a still relatively new country may present some difficulties. Another Filipina, Rachel*, moved to the UK by herself, and married a British man. Although her husband was from a different culture, she still found some challenges that couples with a shared cultural background might encounter, such as trying to find a balance of the ‘old’ culture and the new. She said “we adapted and what we saw, just like a mixture of cultures, we picked up the best what we’ve got, from when we grew up and adopt it here, and then pick up the one that we think is good, then amalgamise it”. It seems, from Rachel’s perspective, that acculturation can have positive influences on the ways in which you choose to raise your children; you can incorporate both cultures to create something new, something that is maybe even better. Maria talked about another positive influence of learning and adopting a new culture: after learning more about the host country, she realised that the way she was brought up in the Philippines wasn’t necessarily the way that she wanted to bring up her children. These two perspectives on raising children are examples of adhesive adaptation, wherein some features of the new culture are taken in by the immigrants and added to their existing culture. This is perhaps one of the greatest benefits of inviting a new culture into one’s life: the ability to create something greater than one culture alone.

An enriching experience

So, I hope we’ve managed to present to you the process of acculturation as more dynamic than simply ‘becoming the same as people from the host country’. It really takes time to develop a common space with the foreign culture, which is built on your growing understanding of it and its values. It’s important to remember that a peaceful co-existence of cultures can be something very valuable, and it can be especially relevant in a relationship with its roots planted in one place, but flourishing in another. You and your partner can learn from the new, and nurture the old, in order to create something that embraces both, and is ready to withstand a variety of difficulties. The common goal of supporting each other through the process of acculturation from an equal stance is crucial, and it needs you both to think about how challenging a new context can be for something that wasn’t originally created to operate in it.

*Names changed for anonymity

[jalilaloui]

Using Laughter as a Coping Mechanism

Many people find  themselves feeling embarrassed once they reminisce about the mistakes they’ve made, even in childhood. Although social missteps and well-intentioned mistakes are common and virtually unavoidable throughout one’s lifetime, many folks beat ourselves up over the embarrassing things we’ve wiped out the past. this will be a big source of stress, particularly for those that experience some level of hysteria, particularly social anxiety. many of us have found solace with the 

straightforward concept, “someday we’ll reminisce on this and laugh.” When we become ready to laugh about the embarrassing things we’ve wiped out the past, we take the shame out of the memory and replace it with camaraderie, or a minimum of an honest measure of humor. this will de-stress the experience and therefore the memory of it. Finding a gaggle of friends, or maybe only one good friend, who can share the burden of embarrassment by sharing an honest laugh, are often transformative. Learning the skill of having the ability to seem at memories this manner can enable us to be more forgiving with ourselves et al. . It can even enable us to react less with embarrassment and more with good humor to mistakes we make within the present, particularly if we imagine that the "someday” when we’ll be laughing about this, are often today. Laughing at what stresses or embarrasses us is an inborn ability for a few, but is often a learned skill for others. you’ll also enhance your ability to try to do this, so it becomes a habit that comes far more easily and automatically. If you want to expand your ability to tease stressful situations, the subsequent tips can assist you to further develop this skill.

Take a Step Back

One of the most goals of finding humor during a stressful situation is to use humor to make the distance between yourself and therefore the stress you’re experiencing. Laughing at the humorous aspects of a stressful situation can assist you to stay things in perspective and remind yourself that what you experience might not be the worst thing you’ll possibly face. If you’re having trouble finding the humor in your situation, it could help to approach things from a special angle: rather than using humor to seek out perspective, put things in perspective to permit yourself to more easily see the humor. If you rate your stress on a scale from 1, which represents “not in the least stressful” to 10, representing “as stressful as this will be,” you’ll often remind yourself that this is not the foremost stress you’ve got faced which things might be worse. This puts space between you and therefore the situation, which space also can add some much-needed levity to things, and make it easier for you to ascertain the humor where possible.

Look for the Absurdity

What are the probabilities? What are the chances that this many things would fail, or that they’d fail during this exact way? Is there irony in your situation? is that this a part of a series of unfortunate events? Is it just what you’d expect if this were a slapstick comedy?

Read Humorous Memoirs

It is often an exquisite stress relief to read humorous books about other people’s lives, and this will provide great practice with self-acceptance also. Well-written books can frame an embarrassing mistake as a hilarious tale which will help us all feel better about our own mistakes. David Sedaris and Mindy Kaling both have excellent books that make this look easy.

Imagine This as an Episode or a Chapter

Some of the simplest comedies have a number of the foremost outlandish problems as a part of the plot, but great comedy also can result from mundane challenges. this is often excellent news because, whatever you face (short of a tragedy), you’ll usually find some humor. It helps to observe funny movies and shows or read funny books somewhat regularly. This helps you to stay in a light-hearted frame of mind, but it also helps you to possess a frame of reference for a way people can face stressful situations with a smile and amusing. Imagine yourself facing the stressful situations you face as if they were a storyline in during an ll|one amongst|one in every of"> one among your favorite shows or a chapter in a beloved book. Imagining how the characters you’re keen on might answer this example, may assist you to seek out a more lighthearted response also, and may a minimum of help to place a smile on your lips more easily. Swap Stories With Friends and Remember Them Talking to friends and finding social support when stressed may be a tried-and-true coping strategy. If you discover a lover who helps you to seek out the humor in stressful situations or maybe just tease other things, hold onto them, and value this quality! (Be bound to return the favor whenever possible, too; this will be good for both of you.) Not only can it help to be ready to call someone, process your situation, and share amusing, it can assist you as you face your stressful situations to understand that you simply have someone out there who will laugh with you later, and it can assist you to recollect all that you’ve got shared laughs about within the past. Having even one such friend can assist you to take care of your sense of humor far more easily.

Practice Journaling

If you’ve enjoyed reading other people’s memoirs or heard friends’ stories. this will assist you to urge easier together with your own. This exposes another tool at your disposal: journaling. Practice humorously writing your stories. you’ll first write them as you’ve experienced them, on the other hand, shift into creative writing mode and mine your experiences for the humor and rewrite within the sort of your favorite author. If nothing else, this will assist you to reap the advantages of journaling.

[d6azylnwhr]

Consider the first statement delivered by Barack Obama after Sandy Hook Elementary School Shooting.

- What are his goals here?

On December 14th, 2012 Barack Obama delivered a statement from the Briefing Room on the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newton, Connecticut. The most prevalent goal of the speech was to unify the nation and call for love, support and humanity in a moment of great adversity. It was a call to overcome political disputes and other seemingly meaningless differences for the common good. Barack Obama’s speech was tailored to every US citizen, because it revolved around the universal theme of family and grief - topics that are sensitive, emotional and evoke a sense of pathos. Furthermore, the goal of the speech was to blur the line between his powerful presidency and his identity as an American citizen in order to create a bond between himself and the people by finding common ground. One of the most evident goals of the speech was to offer his support and condolences to the ‘brokenhearted’ families and to prompt the nation to come together as one. Although it centered around a tragedy that was likely to evoke feelings of terror, despair and hatred (and he acknowledged the brutality and unexplainable nature of the situation) another one of his goals was to instill a feeling of hope in the audience, spreading the implicit message that despite hate, there is a lot of love in the world that binds people together, and that there is a future prospect of peace and harmony for the people of the United States.

- How are his means suited to the occasion?

Barack Obama uses a lot of emotional language and figurative imagery in his speech, such as metaphors, seen in the following examples: ‘our hearts are broken today’ and ‘their innocence has been torn away’, this really lays the foundation that there is nothing that can be done to reverse time or amend the past and to bring back the deceased, highlighting that the aftermath of this tragedy belongs to an emotional landscape. This kind of language hints that grief and empathy should generate support and compassion for the affected families and for one another, in general. It fits the mood of national shock and grief. The use of pathos is also very prevalent in the situation: ‘they had their entire lives ahead of them -- birthdays, graduations, weddings, kids of their own’. He uses enumeratio to describe the course of human life as one progresses from childhood to adulthood, highlighting that the children killed in the school shooting won’t have the opportunity to experience that, hence they have been stripped from their right to live and enjoy the complexities of a fulfilling life that would be otherwise ahead of them. The death of children always creates a sense of sorrow, despair and existential confusion, so his commentary and the use of asyndeton very much match the tragic, unexplainable nature of the event. The continuous use of the pronoun ‘we’ suits the occasion because it binds the nation together. Obama often touches on the topic of overcoming differences and disputes be that political, social or international for the common good, and this is one of the cases. He mentions that ‘we’ve endured too many of these tragedies’, that ‘our hearts are broken’, and ‘these children are our children’ - showing that US citizens are all connected through their humanity and emotions, and it is these things that should steer them in difficult moments. It’s a call for coalition and almost teamwork to overcome adversity. He highlights that suffering is universal and that it is the people’s responsibility to come together and support one another.

- Do you find it effective? Why/why not?

I find Obama’s statement very effective in that it gears away from his political stance and evoke a feeling of national unity and compassion in light of the tragedy. The consecutive use of the pronoun ‘we’ binds the nation together, elucidating the impression that this horrific event is not an individual trauma that must be dealt with privately, but a national tragedy that should affect the lives of every American citizen. I also find it effective, because it instills strong emotions and is characterized by a raw and honest tone. It focuses on the semantic field of family and love, topics that resonate with everybody to some extent, which set this event apart from everyone’s daily routines - makes them realize the drasticity of the situation and puts an end to their desensitization. It raises awareness, calls for empathy and support, whilst simultaneously steering away from hatred and finger pointing. The speech’s short length works in its favour, making it more hard-hitting and powerful. Obama doesn’t sugarcoat the situation in the slightest, or use so-called ‘toxic positivity’ to outshine the devastating nature of the school shooting. He recognizes, as head of state, that this event isn’t something that should be taken lightly and that at this moment no words of condolence or solace will do it justice, because people will be left wounded and ‘brokenhearted’. However, the speech’s effectiveness lies in the fact that it leaves the audience with hope that this state of grief won’t last forever.

- How would you comment on his delivery of the speech?

His delivery of the speech is characterized by prolonged pauses and by a lack of energetic gestures. For some reason, he looks exhausted, burnt out which makes the speech so much more real and also somehow humane, showcasing his emotional, vulnerable side. His other speeches seem full of vigour and life - he embodies the perfect orator in every sense. Here everything seems subdued, as if he’s too shaken for words. It’s hard not to notice the way he frequently bows his head, checking his notes, which results in him talking without making eye-contact or looking at the camera - something that would otherwise not be accepted and would be marked as a major error. Yet here it just makes him look more ‘human’, in the sense that it illustrates his inner turmoil. It’s evident that this event has taken a toll on his mindset and the sorrow presented in his speech makes him seem deeply affected by the school shooting, which creates a bond between him and the audience. It also adds an aspect of humility and nobleness, seeing as his speech isn’t centered around his own persona, but around those affected by the tragedy. It's as if he’s standing in the shadow of the event. The frequent pauses, the longest of which happens after he says ‘the majority of those who died today were children -- beautiful little kids between the ages of 5 and 10 years old’, create the impression that he’s stepping down from his position in the spotlight to honour the lives that have been lost.

Consider the speech made by Barack Obama during the Sandy Hook Prayer Vigil, 17 December 2011 (three days after the shooting).

- Culture, identity and community. How does this text explore ‘aspects of family, class, race, ethnicity, nationality, religion, gender, and sexuality’, and the way these impact on individuals and the society?

• Family

The text explores the aspect of family in great detail, focusing on its universality and relevance to everyone’s lives. This theme of family and love is an effective use of pathos - since family is something that creates emotional appeal due to its sensitive nature. There are a lot of references to parenthood and childhood - and the relationship between parents and children, as seen by the phrases ‘someone once described the joy and anxiety of parenthood as the equivalent of having your heart outside your body all the time, walking around’, ‘this is our first task - caring for children’, ‘there’s only one thing we can be sure of, and that is the love that we have -- for our children, for our families, for each other’. Parents or guardians see their children grow up, go to school, find a job and when that flow of normality gets abruptly put to an end, something feels wrong, uncomfortable, as in the case of the school shooting, where innocent children were killed. Family is shown as something that should be treasured at all costs. It should be an object of love, support, compassion, because in a world full of uncertainties and unanswered questions, family almost acts as a shelter from the many dangers of the outside world. Whatever we define family as, be it blood relations, guardians, very close friends, or fellow citizens, family is a bond often too strong to break and that is something that Barack Obama highlights throughout his speech. The idea of family being perceived as something often undervalued and taken for granted is also prevalent during the Prayer Vigil. The president implies that it takes devastating moments like these to truly raise awareness of how important people are to us and how important it is to love and care for one another in a world full of hatred and spite. Parenthood is described as being vulnerable, of losing parts of yourself to ensure the safety and happiness of your child and as acceptance of knowing that they won’t always be yours to keep. Obama uses family as a method of uniting people and shedding a positive light on the situation - he appeals to the audience’s emotions, encouraging them to strengthen their relationships with those around them. Family is presented, once again as common ground between everybody - and despite its almost fleeting nature, its etherality due to the fact that people come and go, it is something that should be cherished. The effect it has on people is that it evokes strong emotions - the topic of family is sensitive for everyone, possibly because it touches the lives of every individual in a myriad of ways, be that positive or negative. Obama constantly stresses that family is something people can be sure of - it is our rock at the end of the day, that can support us and share our problems, and people have the basic need to belong. It is presented as something of critical importance and something that we should always prioritize.

• Nationality

Nationality is explored in the text, as something that binds people together and as a kind of common factor shared between every American. Their American identity connects them together by an invisible thread - thus making a relatively local tragedy, a national one. Nationality is expressed as something along the lines of a family or a universal support system, as seen in the phrase ‘I can only hope that you’re not alone in your grief’. Furthermore, the use of the pronoun ‘we’ in phrases such as ‘we have wept with you’ and ‘whatever portion of sadness we can share with you to ease this heavy load, we will gladly bear it’ creates a bond between both the President and the audience. It is something that is presented, as a responsibility of compassion and kindness towards one’s neighbours. It’s almost described as something that rids one of loneliness and replaces that feeling with a sense of community, of being heard and seen, and most importantly understood, as seen by the quotation ‘Newtown - you are not alone’. Obama highlights that the school shooting was not a localized tragedy, but a national one, one that should affect the lives of every single American citizen and act as a ‘wake up call’ to take action and to love and appreciate those around us. The phrases ‘we’re all parents’, ‘they’re all our children’, ‘this job of keeping our children safe, and teaching them well, is something we can only do as a nation’ once again illustrate the responsibility that US citizens have of taking care of one another. The President tries to blur the disparity between different groups of people, claiming that factors, such as race, political ideology, or social class should not in any way obstruct the most important similarity they share which is their nationality. Nationality is something that makes every American citizen equal - it is a kind of dependency on one another, a form of mutual respect, a friendship despite all odds. It unites people in moments of importance and when all else fails. That is something that Obama focuses on a lot in his speech through his descriptions of nationality as an unbreakable, unseen bond between people and as a tool to erase prejudice and differences in moments when the only thing left to do is come together and support each other until the pain eases.

• Religion

Religion is an important theme in most of Barack Obama’s speeches and it is especially prevalent in the Sandy Hook Prayer Vigil, since it contains many elements characteristic of a eulogy. Religion in this case is used for national healing and restoring a kind of peace and ease of mind. It offers people an answer to what would otherwise be an unexplainable tragedy that can not be comprehended in any way, causing a great deal of distress. Obama starts with a quote from Scripture, in which the phrases ‘for light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all’, ‘’what is seen is temporary, but it unseen is eternal’ and ‘eternal house’ seem to stand out the most and share a common theme of continuity. Obama’s biblical references fill people with the hope that their struggles will be rewarded with peace and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. He uses religion also a unifying tool, see in the phrase ‘prayers of a nation’, which highlights that religion is possibly the only thing that can bind people together in this moment of unrest. Obama refers to God as looking over humanity, keeping an eye on everything by using religious language such as ‘God’s grace’, ‘even when we’re trying to do the right thing, we know that much of our time will be spent groping through darkness, so often unable to discern God’s heavenly plans’ or ‘let the little children come to me’ Jesus said ‘and do not hinder them -- for such belongs the kingdom of heaven.’ Religion has a huge impact on the audience - it offers them comfort in a time of pain and confusion. And after a tragic event involving the deaths of innocent children, it provides them a kind of peace of mind, knowing that they are in good hands and that there is some kind of consolation in all of this. Often, people are left so stricken that they are left without the ability to think rationally or logically - they need something else to pin their hopes on, knowing they are being looked after, and religion is almost like their anchor, supporting them when nothing else can. The biblical language used highlights this and draws attention to God’s power and love.

[nish-e-r-r-o-r-neesh]

Solangelo Pirate!AU

Here’s the fic requested by @idontwhisper! Hope you like it~

I had to spilt it into two parts because it turned out too long and I may or may not have added some unnecessary subplots which gave me ideas for a full story, so yeah...

Warnings: mentions of murder and some swearing

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Summary: Nico, a servant working in close quarters with the Royal family, just happened to be kidnapped by pirates for information. He just didn’t expect the captain to be that nice merchant he met the other day.

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Pirate!AU, Solangelo!

Despite his stagnant position in life, Nico felt like his luck was finally starting to turn around.

It wasn’t exactly fun being a Royal Servant. Of course, being a servant who came to the royal family’s quarters on a daily basis, ran personal errands for them, and passed messages throughout the palace halls was a job that seemed high-ranking enough for one—and it was. Only, Nico wasn’t exactly contented with the whole ordeal.

He had money in his pockets and a place to stay; a simple goal for an average person in his time. Yet Nico had the constant feeling that he wasn’t living life to its potential, that he could have been doing so much in his time but he simply wasn’t.

Well, there never really seemed much to do.

His world was small, really. The kingdom may have been considered large, but with all the constant errands he ran he’d mapped every street and alleyway in his mind. Of course he could opt to leave the kingdom, travel to another town, but he knew from experience that other cities held nothing.

He’d been from another city after all. He’d hopped from town to town before finally arriving and settling down here. Same old, same old, everywhere he went.

So maybe that was the reason he’d go into town whenever he could. He’d walk through the streets, the plaza, the markets…

He liked the markets.

Well, he never really bought anything, but it was amusing to watch the little wooden toys and contraptions, sly merchants conning their way to their customers’ pockets, and the occasional festival and fights breaking out.

Nico himself stood out of the way. He didn’t particularly enjoy interacting with people, and making new friends seemed too much of a hassle as it was unnecessary. Constantly Nico’s thoughts as he walked through the marketplace, despite all the unwanted advertising-attention he got from all the merchants. After all, he wasn’t the only one getting unwanted attention. Catcalling was common in this particular district.

“Hey there, sweetheart! A beauty like you should get one of these fancy hats!”

Oh, now that was just rude.

Nico turned to the voice to see what poor young lady had caught whatever salesman’s eye, when he found an unruly, sunburnt man with choppy brown hair staring directly at him, crooked-tooth mouth parted in an appreciative smile.

The man’s stall was filled with a variant of cheap-looking hats and dresses—a huge mass of worn and vibrant fabric all mixed together in one whirlwind of clothing hanging from the stall’s hooks and lying in piles.

No, this was simply not going to do.

“Sorry, I don’t wear clothes pulled from a dead corpse,” Nico hissed and stalked away, only to be stopped by a hand around his wrist.

“Hey now, no need to be rude,” The man grinned, his face dangerously coming closer.

Now, Nico knew exactly how to defend himself—he wasn’t some weak sapling. In fact, his right fist was already wound up for a hit. So you can see why he took being ‘saved’ as an offense.

A hand slammed into the side of the unruly man’s face, who was now being pushed against his own stall’s counter screaming apologies. Said hand belonged to another young man, Nico guessed he was a year or two older than him. He had perfectly sun-kissed skin, bright blue eyes, a fluff of golden hair and a spray of freckles over his cheeks and nose. He was grinning ear-to-ear down at Nico, standing back straight and chest puffed out.

The latter, however, gave a disappointed, unimpressed stare.

“I suppose you expect a ‘thank you’?” Nico crossed his arms. The golden-haired man’s grin immediately wavered.

“Um, I-I’m sorry…?”

“Well, thank you, but you only succeeded in saving that imbecile,” he gestured to the crooked-tooth man, still pinned underneath the other’s hand. “I would have had his limbs broken by now, but it seems I’ve lost my bloodlust.” He immediately turned and waved his hand dismissively.

As expected, he had his wrist grabbed once more from behind, followed by the shuffling breaths of the crooked-tooth man being released.

What was not expected, however, was the other saying, “I apologize for the inconvenience. I would like to make it up to you, if you let me?”

Well then…

Nico looked back to the other, who slowly slipped his grip from Nico’s wrist. He was still grinning dumbly, but with a newfound glimmer of hope in his eyes.

“Let me buy you something for lunch, please, just to make this up to you.”

That was a reply Nico had never once heard or expected in his life. He knew he should be cautious but… well, free lunch. Besides, what would a sunny blond in broad daylight possibly do to him? Nico could easily knee him in the groin and escape if he was ever lead into a dark alley…

Oh, why not. Besides, he did seem sincere, and not to mention a little charming—but Nico would rather not think of that for now.

“What’s your name?”

“Will Solace!” The blond announced, loud and proud.

“Heh, alright. I’ll humour you for now.”

“Great! Wait, what’s your na-“

“Nico DiAngelo. Now quick, I’m hungry.”

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Two days.

Two days of being friends with the man and Nico was starting to doubt his entire life.

He was very well aware that he was smiling more often, sharing more things about himself- such as his strange fascination with darkness, whereas most people preferred light- and he had the constant thought of blond hair, blue eyes and sun-kissed skin on his mind.

He never gave away anything sensitive though, like his past with his family or his position as palace staff. Will, however, babbled on endlessly about strange people he’d met, his favorite things to do, and what he’d do if he were king.

Will Solace could only be described as a bundle of sunshine—and a very concerned and caring one at that.

Nico had been walking along the pier with him after they’d had their first lunch together and accidentally tripped on the loose plank. A loose nail on the wooden board had gotten him a fresh wound on the knee. Will was quick to react, his expression and words panicked, but his actions calm and collected. In no time Nico’s knee was patched up stopped bleeding.

Their second lunch, Nico had decided to share the payment—simply as a friendly gesture, nothing more.

Will had decided to take him to the plaza, where he promptly stole a guitar from a street performer and serenaded him, attracting other onlookers and earning a few tips as well as a bump on the head from a very offended street performer.

Nico had to laugh at the experience—a good time he’d definitely remember.

Now… when he came to think of it, the only ‘good times’ he’d ever gotten that weren’t tainted with a sort of sadness was watching festivals from afar. Those were never really ‘good times’ in themselves. People were constantly pushing around him and often he would get washed away in the massive crowd—which led to him attending less and less festivals the more time went on.

Will was practically a ‘good time’ in himself—not so say that in a dirty sort of way. Well… he was charming, captivating. He seemed to have an air of cool collectedness around him, yet could still act as immature and bubbly as a puppy, and very presence brought Nico a very calming sense of freedom.

And now, laying in his bed in the dark in the servant’s barracks, he longed for the sense of freedom. Maybe going places to see the sights wasn’t entirely what he longed for; maybe what he longed for was simply the freedom of doing it, of not being trapped in one spot, of being able to experience new and amazing things… and maybe even share them with someone.

And maybe he could—

Slam! The wooden doors had been forced open. Some fifty servants in the room, along with Nico, jolted awake from their half-asleep states, only registering the fear of seeing glinting blades in the dim moonlight from the doorway.

“Round ‘em up, boys!” A gruff voice called out, followed by a chorus of maniacal laughter as well as horrified screaming from the servants, who were immediately being bound and rounded up like chickens on the death row.  

“Boss said to do this quick, so gag the whole lot of ‘em. We take half o’ these gammy-legs back, the other half stays in ‘ere!” The gruff voice declared.

Nico had barely registered anything said, struggling to find his way through the mass panic, before a horrid-smelling piece of cloth was secured around his mouth. Then rough pairs of hands bound his arms and legs together in heavy rope. He struggled, but was soon pushed to the floor as he squirmed in protest.

The sight of a glinting blade being waved in his face and several men in clothes of a similar fashion was the last thing Nico saw before he blacked out, with only one last thought—pirates.  

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Hope you like it! Tell me what you thought~

Part Two>>

[astormofships]

Pick Your Darling: Annette

“Darling heart, I loved you from the start, but you'll never know what a fool I've been. Darling heart, I loved you from the start, but that's no excuse for the state I'm in..”

Ship name

Winter Melody. The Wolf and the Siren. The Warrior and the Maid come again, jested Theon. No names blended, it wouldn't be satisfactory. They are much better left alone xD

Meeting

White Harbour was probably the most prosperous and welcoming city in the North. And luckily, you lived there. All your life, to be exact. The people were fond of sweet Annette; if a visitor dropped by, they might hear tales of a golden haired woman healing the mind with music. They praised your harmonious voice too. Others were curious about your Lannister look, golden hair and green eyes. But it wasn't that bad, considering your noble blood and illogicality of hiding a possible relative when Lord Tywin could have married you to spread his power in Westeros. No, you were not related to the lions in any way. Words reached Catelyn Stark's ears which prompted an invitation to Winterfell. Accepting, you arrived a full moon later. She personally welcomed you and introduced her family during a humble yet tasty meal prepared in your honour. Afterwards, a visit of the castle followed. Sansa and Robb were your guides although the former did most of the task seeing that the latter was required somewhere else.

First impressions, the way it used to be before it became romantic

Words flowed easily. Politeness did not put a strain on the discussion, nor added pressure to the cordial atmosphere. Surprisingly, humor made an appearance. He was not just a lord's son, and you were not just a pleasing face. A friendship surely took root, based on positivity, respect and trust. You stayed a few months, then returned home. And repeat. When you weren't in the city, letters were the best option. While Arya, Rickon and the rest of the Starks preferred to see you in person, Sansa had taken to send ravens. But the one who possessed the most faithful quill feather was Robb. The content of the letters spoke of news of self, families and respective cities. Ranting on parchment or giving opinions was not a rarity. Talking about the plot of stories and characters you wrote happened. You played games, too, like long distance riddles. Signatures were usually “R”, “A” or “Winter” and “Melody”. That way people may not recognize who wrote if they stumbled upon it intentionally or accidentally. If a Littlefinger had access to them, he would figure it out almost immediately. The initials and names, along with the known friendship, were effortless to link back together and guess who the authors were. Annette and Robb were not known to focus on cleverness or worry about intelligence. By no means simpletons, being associated with bravery or fairness were more flattering and accurate goals. But anyway, being together was better, naturally. You knew what to say when he was feeling down, he would be there to offer help even though you were sometimes too stubborn to consider accepting. That unhealthy habit had met its enemy; the young man was determined to be there no matter what, whether support was in the form of physical assistance, a shoulder to cry on or making you laugh. Not particularly knowledgeable in the art of music, he liked hearing you play instruments and sing, or both at the same time. He sang with you when feeling overly bold and merry. Dancing lessons were a thing, to not lose the practice acquired years ago. Yeah, right. Mostly because it was enjoyable too. Knowing how important writing was, he made sure to get parchments, quills and bottles of ink before your current resources were entirely used. In return, you allowed him to read some of your work. Because why not? His hear soared the first time it occurred, honoured by the actual proof of trust you were showing. During competitions including swords, mêlées, archery or any brutish entertainment, you were apprehensive but always rooted for him. When he wanted to get away from his duties or find solace, he joined you in the library. It was a soothing place, nobody spoke there. Just you two, actually. Little rebels. About nothing and everything, or books. The one resting on the table you were sitting at, or other tales. It led to passionate debates, philosophical ones or sharing dreams, who were your favourites heroes and heroines, what lands you would love to see, real or not.

Who took the first step

No meeting organized, fate let it happen when the stars were aligned. Or if you were less poetic, feelings spoke on their own and did the job. It's crazy how both could smile and look at the other without saying anything, content. One day, you were dancing. Eyes met, even wanted to close. Overwhelmed to the point of forcing yourself to break contact or else no more distance would exist between your bodies, you excused yourself. He asked if you were okay. Nodding with a smile to reassure him, he saw through the protective mask and gently took ahold of your hands, caressing one with his thumb to sooth your growing nerves and keep you in place. He verbally acknowledged what was going on between the two of you. Professed his feelings. It made you smile, feeling like everything was perfect at this specific moment. Then laughter openly escaped your mouth. Sighing peacefully, arms lightly resting on his shoulders as it went to circle around his neck, you told him you had fallen too. And with those words, you kissed him with firm tenderness. He responded eagerly.

Who approves, who disapproves

His siblings were pleased. Your entourage were beyond themselves: Annette and the heir of Winterfell? The Sevens had blessed the family. Theon was satisfied if his best friend was happy, there were worse women in the land.  You were a catch.

Well, all the ladies who dreamed of a handsome and wealthy husband and a few men who wanted to seduce you clearly weren't enchanted by the news but what could they do.

Ned and Cat were surprised that their eldest son would settle for you. You were respected and loved by many, including them. But they imagined Robb betrothed to a lady of a higher house. Reed, Karstark, Mormont... your name did not figure on the list. They did not protest vehemently, though. Nobles seldom married for love and if their son had this chance, they would not ruin it for him.

The best friend and the one you get along with the least

Sansa. You both lived in your head and trusting one another, it allowed to gush and share fantasies you wouldn't dare with anyone else. She was the one who got to read your stories and give constructive criticism or compliments. Gaining a new sister was a tempting prospect to her. Being the old one, she had always wanted a big sister to look up to. You were not a disappointing choice.

Robb often asked for her opinion concerning gifts when he was doubting his own.

“What should I offer Annette? Her name day is approaching and she deserves something special. “

“Well, maybe you should favour a sentimental present instead of material.”

“Should I just.. write a poem?”

Let's just say he was relieved Theon and Jon were not here to listen to the conversation, those pricks certainly would tease the crap out of him. He would simply pity them, ignorants to the joy of love.  

In this universe, Theon was fascinated by the way you seem to wish to see the good in everyone, even a scoundrel like him.    

Cersei was convinced you were a tart.

Joffrey and The Hound were a little disgusted by the constant goodness.

If somebody else fancies one of you

Who doesn't sigh dreamily at the thought of Robb Stark? Men wanted to be him and women longed to be in his arms.

Your pretty eyes and alluring voice charmed more than one, especially a young lad back home who you didn't view as more than a friend.

The best and the worst

The common dream of happiness and having children with the love of your life.

His co-existing reliability and playfulness.

Your heart of gold.

The locks he loves to caress and play with, the eyes he never gets tired of staring into.

How embraces feel like home.

THE RED WEDDING.

Hogwarts Houses

Chivalry, Bravery, Boldness. Loyalty, Honesty and Justice.  Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Robb could fit in both. But he eventually became a rebel and the King in the North. So Gryffindor it is. Dedicated, friendly and unafraid of toil, yours remain Hufflepuff.

Seven Deadly Sins and Virtues

Wrath, both of you. Usually calm and friendly, the young wolf had a temper when provoked. He became the leader of a rebellion, did he not? In the name of his father, murdered by the crown. Revenge in mind and justice in his sword, Robb Stark was ready to destroy those unappeasable enemies who were also ready to fight to the death. Forget positivity for a minute and let's imagine someone crossed the line by engaging in evildoing and betrayal. These were two things you could not tolerate, nor forgive. Especially not from a loved one. You might try to give them a second chance, but nothing would be as it used to be. Messing with you was not recommended.

  Dutiful, content to live a peaceful life and chivalrous,  his virtue would be Diligence.

Kindness is yours again, for obvious reasons.

Who is the sun, who is the moon

The Direwolf represents House Stark, we know that. But he is not the moon just because of that. People watch Robb because he is a son of Winterfell and easy on the eye, let's be honest. The moon can be seen during the day, if you try very hard to see it. Truly? Correct or not, we know it's there. When they look at you, it's because you attract attention when you enter the room. If the place was already illuminated, you'd still bring another source of light with your mere presence. You radiated like the sun, with those good intentions and bubbly aura.  

Endgame or not

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.... no. You thought Ned Stark's death was the end of your romance but when you tried again, a name was the answer. Frey. Or was it Westerling? When Robb prepared himself to go to war against the crown, you wanted to go as well. Refusing categorically, your stubbornness was your strongest ally in this fight. Yes, there was shouting involved. Without condescension, he pleaded with you not to follow because of your chronic pain and how your place was not on an army's camp. They moved a lot and had to be swift in case of surprise attack. He was worried you would get in harm's way although he knew trusted soldiers would keep you safe. Besides, what if they couldn't? What if the enemies took you hostage or worse? What if he died? What if the war was lost? Telling you to go home was the best choice. Even if White Harbour were allies of the North, the Lannisters couldn't dismiss them in the end; business with the Manderlys was useful: Fish, thick clothing, its notable seaport visited by Westerosi and Essosi people... you had the chance to have a decent future, in spite of Robb's presence in your life. You were angry, to say the least. But he was the love of your life, was he not? You wanted to follow your heart, and it was him. You wanted to stand by his side as he lived the worst years of his life,  fighting for a good cause: his family. He accepted, touched by the loyalty but still worried nevertheless. It all crashed down when he told you of his alliance with Walder Frey, how he had to marry one of his daughter. And that was it. Your relationship was over. Pride wouldn't let it pass. Deep down, there was hope for another solution to come up at the last minute but no. Bad news did: Robb suddenly got married to a lady of the west named Jeyne Westerling. Not only were you heartbroken and betrayed, but so were the Freys. That is, betrayed. It's not like they personally cared for the Young Wolf. It was over, truly, when it had the potential of lasting forever. Sorrow, rage, what feeling dominated you the most? You wondered. When a tragic payback called The Red Wedding took place, news began to spread the next morrow. You were speechless at first, literally and figuratively. Catelyn, Grey Wind, Ro'-him. They did not deserve such fate, never. All you could do was mourn, and move on. Thank the Seven for your entourage, what would you have done without them and their support? Quite frankly, you didn't know.          

Who I truly ship you with regardless of the requests’ details

Robb is my favourite match even if you end up with Jaime, which won't last either. This lion man has another woman in mind and heart. And it isn't his twin, nor you.

[thesweetblossoms]

The Palm Trees Pretending To Be Stars

🌴🌴🌴If you make someone else feel good you make yourself feel good as well. This is a very important lesson, I hope to share with my children. One of human natures intractable flaws is that unfortunately, we often feel better when we realize the misfortune of others. The premise of gratitude is thankfulness for what we have often in comparison to what others lack. Yet, at the same instance, it is a design of reality that no person has everything that could possibly be desired; one cannot find the unequivocal solace of home, while also intoxicated with the maddening delight of travel, or, it is generally rare to be both very young and financially successful, or both a cosmonaut as well as a Oscar winning musician, or to be able to sit comfortably in a commercial plane while also possessing model tall measurements. Thus while I try to separate the knowledge of my abundance and immense privileges from the fact that it is a standard measured at the misfortune of others, I find it easier to attempt to share the happinesses, charms or graces that have been bestowed to me by chance, hard-work or determination. It is a suspiciously easy act to smile and acknowledge another persons presence, offering a smile, a light comment, or even the pleasant companionship of silence. When we interact with people, creating a cloud of contentment, peace or comfort, may benefit the outcomes of the unfolding stories that occur past the encounter. The interaction might highlight positive emotions, hopes, ideas or goals. A conversation itself could be a form of therapy: soporific, analgesic and healing. The magical element, is sometimes, not knowing for sure, who is the healer and who is the wounded.

The Language of Sweet Alyssum

There is an art of reading the subtle, wordless, language of energy and movement, it is a nuanced dialect, with characteristics ranging in stillness, breath, gestures, gait, flow, habits and other physical exchanges with the natural world. I notice the quiet conversations of blossoms in the garden; the way the marigolds teeter over the edge of the balcony in a reckless drive to cavort with solar illumination, or how the gentle natured and fragile sweet alyssum stubbornly survives another year in its black widow fabric grow pot, whereas the more enthusiastic and vivacious Maria Callas roses fail to make another appearance in time, or how the soaring palm trees tightly wrapped in fairy lights during Christmas seem proud of being ornamented as such, briefly pretending to be stars, or how the dramatically swooning peace lilies leaves perk up immediately after a sip of water, or how my betta fish, Rufus, rudely turns his back on my fish flakes after I’ve left him for a few days.

The Bengal Tigers

My grandfather hunted tigers and now there are only 400 tiggers left in the Sundarbans. Often people in the moment are ridiculously unaware of the tremendous cost of their actions. Thus I remind my self that the future may audit the choice I make, the work I accomplish, the policies I encourage, the ideas I disseminate and the reality I manipulate. We must savor the last Bengal tigers roaming our earth, and bow our heads in shame at the fallacy of mankind. Yet, we mustn’t repeat the mistakes of our ancestors and attempt to preserve the diverse, magnificent and awe inspiring creatures that share our earth during our time.

Lilies At The Office

There were oriental lilies in the office, a few weeks ago. Somebody has placed the burgeoning, scarlet tipped, freckled lilies in the break room, as if they were a plate of cookie or the breakfast bagels one of the senior attorneys brings in for the firm. Though we couldn’t nibble on these, or use them as an excuse to take a break from our billing to snack, chat and commiserate, they deepened the brief reprieves from our matters, allowing us to realize that there is another language beyond words, analysis and writing, of the enthralling loveliness inherent in the delicate and ethereal botanical parallel, outside our freezing, artificially lit offices. Being in the company of flowers is a healing balm, we should uncompromising rise up from our desks to encounter the unfolding, whispering and mesmerizing petals. No matter our professions, we conspire with other sentient beings, especially those who unfailingly provide, solace, understanding, graciousness, peace and allows us to travel past gossamer veiled realms as we match our breaths to theirs.

Memoirs

To recognize the significance of an events occurrence, as its happening, is harder to do without the necessary element of time. Yet by reading other individuals experiences in memoirs or diaries we may recognize common foibles, or seemingly random yet actually repeated patterns, or gain insights into human behavior that provide the benefit of hindsight in the present. Thus, I reliably reach for a memoir when I have a chance to read, whether it is about itinerant and exhausting travels in Africa, or tiny rooftop gardens in the city, or of artistic minds, surmounting the walls that attempt to obscure true discovery and expression.

Magical Notes

The world of magic offers us a window to escape the unrelenting mundanity of being, it is a space devoted to fancies, madness, whimsy, charm, imaginations and emotions. On some fraught, heavy, dark hours, I cast spells to heal my troubled heart, as often, at the peak of distress, the natural and mysterious magical realms offer solace. A random spell, joined with prayer, meditation, yoga, or bathing in the moonlight, eases sadness, with its potent, mesmerizing, entrancing, distracting and ephemeral power.

My magical arsenal includes the common, simple yet exquisite. I rarely need to fetch anything esoteric or scarce, the ingredients, often comprising of elements that linger in nature, that poetically, magnetically, intrinsically and tangibly find themselves near me, dwelling upon pallet wood coffee tables , or on French café wood bed side tables, or on much scratched and paint splattered blond wood stools, upon surfaces that, the objects I find, or those that find me, are laid to rest in my environment.

I use candles for fire, to represent light, the stars.

I pick up bird feathers to swirl the air, and to manifest lightness, the ability to float, or to escape.

I light Palo Santo wood smoke to perfume, twist and turn reality and to change its course.

I use my tears to add a life force to my incantations.

I use garden blossoms, generally fragrant white blossoms, such as rose petals, jasmine, orange blossoms, tuberose or magnolia to extract the inexplicable ability to love, inherent in all sentient creatures.

I use seashells to pummel depths, to symbolism earthly forms, to fuse the power of the seas and the moon.

I use silver, copper, gold, cotton, ceramics, pink salt to fasten the earth.

I do not like to use blood, unless I am already cut and in dire need of a healing spell.

The Art of Writing

Darling readers, when feeling intense emotions, sad, happy, peaceful, distressed, or even angry, use the energy within you to work with the twenty six letters of your instrument, use the time to craft music, using the black and white keyboard to compose your symphony. For what we share, in written form, leaves clues about out our time to the future and the future responds in kind.

Often, when I write I have a inkling that I must conceal my secrets, that I mustn’t disclose my tricks, or show my hand, yet, I immediately realize how futile it is to hide any discovery, idea, method, theory or thought, for writing it down, is the surest way to receive more ideas, or to come up with more solutions, for writing is a channel for understanding our consciousness, the universe and reality. I am certain, that thinking only accelerates the pace of new, innovative and good ideas. When we decide to share our knowledge, to display our wisdom or to generously dissipate answers, we enhance our ability to divine these, providing a fertile terrain for them to germinate in our mind, percolate through our hearts, before blossoming on paper, or, staining the electronic tablet, typed, by our open hands.

Forget Me Not Blue

The reality unfolding before us would be heavenly, if every new sentence we wrote were more beautiful than the previous, and if every new moment were more breathtaking than the past, where, our pains would follow a reverse correlation and our tears would be outnumbered by our joys. This morning at work, around 7 am, I stole away to our attorneys outdoor seating area, bordered with oleanders, lantana, pink grasses and bougainvillea to witness the painfully gorgeous and emotionally rendered desert winter sunrise, I saw the particular drama of the rising sun, over inky, low mountains and merry clusters of date palms and palos verdes trees, finding it, a far more symphonic revelation; distinct, brilliant and enthralling in its own lighter, early morning way than the haunting, night beckoning and

cathartic sunsets. Against a faintly lit forget me not blue background, high, debutante clouds of feathery pink, shy peach, anklet silver, English mist gray, divorcee lavender and edged with absconding navy borders, lingered, the vivaciously, tantalizingly, exuberantly and expectantly, bejeweled clouds, organic, attenuating forms, seemingly saluting a never to be repeated, sui generis day. Later, returning home early, due to an elementary school early release, exhausted and stripped of vitality, I took a nap, only to wake up with that strange, melancholy, despairing, teary mood that befalls, in the half way space following, a brief, yet deep sleep that begins in the afternoon and commences when it is already dark. To rid myself of the blanketing and despondent stupor, I ventured into the petite desert balcony garden. I bent to inhale the bewitching, creamy, dramatic, poetic and ecstatic perfume of graceful, elegant and pristine tuberose blossoms adorning a single, perfect, slender stalk, with graduating layers of open, double buds tapering to a pointed crown of tightly wound unopened flowers. As I let the molecules of its hypnotic fragrance drift up my nose, I practiced slow, measured, drawn out yoga breathes to hold in its essence within me, heavily flowing to the olfactory centers of my brain, but further into the unexplained corners of my heart. The redolent petals enthralled and eased my troubled emotions, cleansing my palate of stinging doubts and showering me with an otherworldly perspective that lifted beyond the trifling blocks of self, mind and consciousness.

The Last Day

If today were my last day of earth, I would likely spend it in nature, by the sea, collecting seashells, learning about different varieties for mushrooms, messaging old friends, jumping, skipping and cavorting in the lacey, foamy, infinite, unconcerned waves, or I would rise early in the morning, to gaze longingly at the constellations, floating like idle, silver dust in the ceaseless universe, I would try to paint the tantalizing, balmy flowers that grow in my garden, the cosmos, Mexican sunflowers, roses, sweet alyssum, chrysanthemums and black eyed Susan’s. It would begin with coffee but I would also add a rich, arsenic green tinted pistachio muffin, I would listen to Bach, dance to Bruce Springsteen hits slowly, the ones saturated with the simmering pain and woven cast of despair that annotates many of our experiences, such as, “Hungry Heart” or “I’m on fire”, I would reread indelible stanzas of poetry such as “The Highwayman” by Lord Tennyson, I would take a hike to collect wildflower and to ponder more fungi, poppies and lichen, I would go to a bookstore and read satisfying and pleasurable books on gardening, design or consciousness, I would perform yoga by candlelight and meditate in a room with an awakening tuberose blossom perfume, languorously imbibing the sunlight, in a calm, pale blue apothecary vase, to bloom quietly and ravenously at dusk. But, if it were truly my last day on earth, I would venture to my garden, clear spaces on my soil, pick up leaf debris, use my husbands pliers to clip the old wood of the dead honeysuckle branches, that I couldn’t bear to discard before, I’d rake the squid ink particles of loam, clay, sand and manure to aerate the earthly womb, I would take a bamboo stake and annotate the surface inches less then our own final material resting places, meditatively scatter hummingbird and butterfly seed mixes, use my English garden trowel to obscure the inanimate, latent particles, trail a cloud of blush pink pebbled plant food, before decanting water into the vessels for masses of flowers in the future, for a bouquet.

Subtle Errors

Imagine if once in a while there are mishaps in the force of gravity or glitches in the speed of light, would our dreams become reality and our reality fade further into our reveries? Would the candle flame separate and set off musical, fragile, mini fireworks in our room, or the piano play it self in a delicate frenzy, or would the botanicals in the painting animate and release their perfume, or the lines of the book float into the space for us to read and grab and insert into our own program, maybe the world would be shaken upside down and we would walk on clouds and and the meadows would be our sky, or for once, we would be able to see with our brains as well as our heart.

Albino Peacocks

I have been uninspired lately, unable to conjure even minimal ideas to discuss further on the page. Perhaps it’s the excessive work hours combined with family obligations that’s led to burnout, or that the crucial point where I finally stop frittering my time surfing the web and social media is increasingly more difficult to surmount. Yet while I know that I must write, to think more carefully about my world, to mine the mysteries of reality, to help me understand myself, to further my entanglements with words, to heal those times of anxiety, restlessness or mundanity, to enrich the moment by creating sentences or to send messages into the future, I unfortunately push aside this calming activity, by being blatantly lazy or finding innumerable excuses to not sit down and write. But, upon further consideration, I realize that every day invariably carries inimitable charms, that the hours often contain transformative moments, brief recesses, simple joys or half hours of peace to linger, contemplate and partake in those activities that improve the living experience upon this tiny azure droplet in space and time.

These happinesses sometimes consist of daily observations in my garden, noting optimistic orange calendula blossoms from seeds I forgot I planted, while imagining also designing, a Saturday morning bouquet of calendula, Mexican sunflowers, orange African marigolds, debutante pink cosmos and summer cloud white roses in an old strawberry jam jar, or, they include eating a dark chocolate gift from my husband, with raw walnuts, while sipping Tetleys Orange Pekoe tea that I brought back from Toronto, savoring the muted, honeyed tones of the tea liquor, in the gentle filaments offered by ivory pillar candles, while reading the compelling and disarming narrative of “The Tigers Wife” by Tea Obrecht, or cooking barely seasoned wild caught salmon with pink salt, pepper and shallot oil, accompanied with a provocative watermelon, feta and basil salad, or taking walks around a mountain, palm, mesquite tree bordered desert lake feature with a few attorneys during a brief adjournment from our practice, or discovering that African Shea butter is a graceful and luxurious way to temper the ravages of dry Arizona winter air, or being thrilled by the mesmerizing images of albino peacocks against an emerald green meadow, or imagining owning a small plot of land to grow a field of marigolds, sweet peas and dahlias, or waking early to go to work before sunrise when the new moons faint light is subordinated by the intoxicating vista and performance of stars, or returning early from work on a Friday to witness a preternaturally gorgeous sunset with drifts of lavender nimbus clouds, pink lit and beribboned with silver charms.

Pearls & Black Ribbons

For my trip to Bangladesh at the end of the year, I intend to be very minimal in my approach and to convey a sense of style in thoughtful, considered pieces, including a few evocative and striking dresses, skinny jeans, white cotton blouses and dresses, ballet slippers, open toed gold and nude sandals and nude wedges, delicate, dainty and shimmering jewelry including tiny diamonds, pearl, emerald, opal and amethyst studs, pearl and emerald pendants and elegant pearl and brass bracelets. By premeditating a few dedicated hairstyles, including double Dutch brains, singular French braids, messy buns, high black ribboned ponytails and half up bouffant styles, and eschewing to a shimmering, glowy, blushed, smudged eyeliner and bright lipped face, clean and classic ballet slippers, lavender, peach and alpine snow white toned manicures and pedicures, plus coconut oiled skin, Ill have rescued some thought space to how to spend my hours, anticipating, meeting the people who positively intensify the experience of visiting a place, selecting riveting books to read, strategizing on value creating projects, and manifesting new connections while nestled in a beguiling, history soaked and distinct corner of the globe.

Never Stop Dancing

Meeting friends and sharing old memories, catching up, contemplating our current adventure, and deliberating upon future plans is one the happiest palliatives of any season. I recently hung out with an old friend visiting town who is a mesmerizing, talented, intense, inordinately gifted and emotionally captivating dancer. She noted that she loved Arizona as she felt closer to the earth, felt the palpitating and alluring vibrational pull of the desert, and that she enjoyed encountering the Native Americans who originally dwelled upon this terrain. As we discussed our love of creating, whether gardening, writing poetry or dancing, she said that we must unfailingly set our work into the universe, even if merely one person reads our words, or watches our dance performances. I believe that when we create we feel better about our selves; sharing what has given us solace, or eased our anxiety or made us forget our woes, might also help another, in form or in content. 🦋

[redefinethegrind]

What is true love?

I have found another person in this life with whom I can share everything. I can be truly open with her. She knows everything about me. There are no secrets anymore. I have exposed every inch of my mind to her, good, bad, beautiful, or disgusting. I felt that it was important to share every nuance with her as I got to know her. The desire to let her see the real me was intense and burning. True love takes all of this in and accepts it for what it is. True love does not ask me to atone for my past sins or to change my core values. True love is accepting and loves regardless of my faults.

I have become fascinated with a girl who entered my life unexpectedly. We were both married when I met her. I was married to a woman I loved very much, but with the new girl there was definitely something different. With my ex-wife, I had love, I had deep friendship and companionship, but I lacked the feeling of ultimate comfort and acceptance. I felt that we were unable to connect on that very deep romantic level. My soul yearned for that intimacy and I didn’t even know it. I’m sure hers did too. When we both realized that parts of our hearts were still empty after 16 years we went our separate ways. I chose to end my marriage because of that and because of my past actions. I was not always a good husband, in fact there were times when I was outright terrible.

Depression had taken away my will to have a deep connection. I spent every waking hour with my ex-wife outside of work, and I still had my doubts of our relationship at times. That is hard to admit and sounds cruel. On the surface everything was perfect. Underneath I still longed for someone to connect with. My mind was always on the deepest questions of life. Why are we here? what did we come from? Who is God? What is love? I could not engage her in my deep discussions very often. Her mind was on her interests. Honestly, I went on to find that many of her interests were also of value to me, but it was too late. It was after years of me disappointing her and dragging her through the mud. She was a good person. She was a good wife. She was the best nurse I have ever seen… and at the risk of sounding arrogant or outright selfish, something was still missing.

I found that something in my dream girl. A girl who I had dreamt about before meeting her. This sounds completely fabricated, but I can assure you it isn’t. I met her by chance and it was strictly business when she entered my clinic as a lost patient. She opened her heart to me and we worked on her problems together. The more we chatted the more we realized just what all we had in common. Without her telling me I could sense that we were both wayward souls wondering through this universe hurt, confused, and essentially alone. That sounds harsh because we were both married, but I knew from the beginning that our marriages weren’t giving either of us what we were seeking.

I gathered the courage to discuss that touchy subject with my dream girl. It was at first awkward and full of angst that I poured out my true feelings. I had to stop caring for her professionally because it was the ethical thing to do. I did not want to abandon her. I struggled with those feelings of guilt. I felt that severing our professional relationship might cause her pain, but I knew that I wanted something so much deeper than a professional relationship. I wanted to share my life with this person. I wanted to get to know her intimately, every inch of her mind and body.

Ultimately, she confessed her love for me as well. We were both having the same feelings. Fate had brought us together. It meant too much to ignore. My mind was obsessed, and my heart was on fire. I looked her in the eye as I sat in the hallway of a mental institution. She had come to visit me after I had a panic attack and nearly fractured from reality. She was visiting with my wife and sister. I locked eyes with her. We had done that so many times before and could communicate a lifetime worth of words with a single gaze. I muttered “I love you” despite the fact that we weren’t alone. It was inappropriate for the setting. It was unadulterated. It shook her to her very core. She had never felt true love before. That was true love.

Both dream girl and myself left our marriages. We quickly moved in together. I wanted to offer her a sanctuary and give her room to grow. I wanted to spend my days showing her what true love was. Unfortunately, my plans didn’t fall into place without an extreme amount of resistance. In the process of losing my mind and going to the psychiatric ward I also lost my professional life which meant I lost my income. I was entering financial peril and I had promised this beautiful person that I would support her. I was unable to live up to my promise. My mind began to shake with terror. I again became anxious. I became depressed. I became suicidal. I gave up.

Ultimately, I tried to drink myself to death. I was consuming huge quantities of vodka in order to stay asleep for days on end. It was dream girl and my sister who came to my rescue and shook me off of my coffin shaped couch. I hurt them both in the process. I checked out and gave up on them while they stood by me. Their hero was reduced to a useless pile of flesh at his own hands. I felt great shame. As I sat up I vowed to never fall into that despair again. What dream girl did in staying by my side, despite the fact that I verbally, emotionally, physically, and mentally hurt her… that was true love. She loved me even if I was a monster for a time.

That is how I know what true love is. It is undying. It is forgiving. It is everlasting. I will always love my ex-wife and I truly do regret hurting her, but I can truly say that I now I have something deeper that is ultimately better for me. I don’t mean to sound selfish or to take away from anything, it is just how I really feel. True love saved me, captivated me, and gave me inspiration where nothing else could. True love came through when I really needed it.

For those in my life who can’t understand my decisions or actions, I am truly sorry. I have not acted to intentionally hurt anyone or as a selfish monster. I found a person who I believe truly needs me and I feel that I truly need her. It is a reciprocating, fulfilling, and mature type of love that I never knew existed. It isn’t always easy. It isn’t straight forward. It isn’t painless. I am incredibly vulnerable and open with this girl. I have to be to grow with her. I am nervous at times, but I offer my vulnerability as a way to learn and grow. With great risk comes great reward. I am not co-dependent, but I do feel that I really need this girl in order to achieve my goals. My main goal is to grow deeper with her.

I want to explore our relationship with my remaining days. I want to get to know every little nuance that makes up dream girl. I want to thumb through the pages of her beautiful mind. I want her to feel the ultimate level of comfort and ease with me. I want her to be as open and vulnerable as I am. I want to know that she truly trusts me, depends on me, loves me, and needs me. I don’t say that to be selfish, but I do want those things.

I want to feel needed and appreciated. I want to know that someone is so head over heels for me that the thought of me leaving means they would have a deep void in their heart. I want to be wanted. I want to be loved. I want to be needed. I have never felt that way in my life. I always just assumed that I was a pawn and an unnecessary player on this sick chess board. Now I want more. I want to matter. It gives me a sense of pride and comfort. I used to think that I could never have my heart broken. I used to think that I wouldn’t care if the world simply forgot about me. I still feel that way for every person in this world other than one. That one is my dream girl.

I want my dream girl to love me just as much as I love her. To depend on me the way I depend on her. To be my other half. To be my everything and I to be hers. I want us to close our eyes and dance to our own soundtrack in this life. I want to perceive the beauty of this world with her and to explore the deepest regions or consciousness, life, love, sexuality, and emotion with her. Everything else in this world could disappear and I know as long as I have my dream girl in my arms I will still be able to smile. I hope that she feels that way about me as well. I want to share that wonderful feeling that is true love.

True love is selfish selflessness. To have the courage to admit that I need someone else. To have the nerve to honestly say I am dependent on someone else for my well-being. It isn’t co-dependence. It is deeper than that. It is true love. I know if she disappears I will continue on living, but life will feel empty without her. That is how I know I have the one that I need. I have never felt this way before. That is true love. I know that my days without dream girl would be defined by an obvious and painful void. That is true love.

I also know that when I look into her eyes and kiss her tender lips I feel a sense of tranquility, comfort, security, and solace like nothing I have ever known. When I wrap my arms around her I no longer feel the weight of the world. Nothing else matters but that moment. That is true love. I explore her soft skin with my fingertips and gently wipe her hair away from her gorgeous eyes. I feel her cheeks and for a moment don’t even believe that she could really exist. I am skeptical that such a perfect person could truly be right there with me, but every time I open my eyes she remains.

When my dream girl hurts I hurt. When my dream girl smiles I smile. That is true love. The level of empathy I feel with her is foreign to me and can be outright exhausting. I have never known that I could connect so deep with someone, yet I want to go deeper and deeper. I touch my forehead to hers and gingerly caress the back of her head. I can feel our breaths synchronizing as we passionately make love. That moment our connection is all that matters. The rest of the world is gone. I am not ashamed that I am overweight, I don’t think about my weirdness or how I have let others down, I am simply in heaven in that moment. She makes me feel appreciated, loved, and wanted. I have never experienced that before. I must admit selfishly that I love it.

I want more of it. I want to forever be what my dream girl craves. I will do anything for her and will live out the rest of my days in true joy if I can just have her at my side.

[somapancakes]

BA Thesis

To what extent is the idea of “knowing Brahman” sourced in the Upanishads?

Abstract

This study attempts to examine the notion of ‘knowing Brahman,’ as presented by the Upanishads. It also looks at the suggestion that ‘knowing Brahman’ is essentially a way of completing the goal of the Hindu; to be released from the cycle of death and re-birth, attainting spiritual freedom.  The study calls upon other sources in Hindu philosophy such as the Bhagavad-Gita and the Brahma-Sutras to analyse the extent to which this notion is available in theUpanishads. Also bringing in parallels to the Western philosophical ideas of Plato, looking at the ideas regarding language, consciousness, self-awareness and causality.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

- Pantheism, the Upanishads & the concept of Brahman.

- Knowledge of Brahman in Vedanta philosophy & its thinkers.

- The problem of language.

- Ways to conceptualise the notion of Brahman.

- ‘Knowing Brahman’ through applications in modern science and the concept of truth.

Chapter 2

- Spiritual freedom.

- Brahman as the controller of perceived reality and what is known.

- Purusha and prakriti.

- The notion of the self and the ‘best life’ in the Katha Upanishad & Plato’s Phaedrus.

Chapter 3

- Brahman’s Unity of Being.

- A shared consciousness.

- Sensory experience, mystical experience and defending the notion of Brahman.

Chapter 4

- Phillips’ parallelism thesis.

- Self-awareness.

- Non-dual Brahman - a causal objection.

Chapter 5

- Rejection of the causal objection.

- Concluding Thoughts.

- Learning Journal.

- Bibliography.

Chapter 1

- Pantheism, the Upanishads & the concept of Brahman.

Pantheism is the belief that the true essence of all reality is divine. In both Greek and Indian thought, it is seen as a ‘systematic critique of polytheism’ (MacIntyre, 2006:95). In Hinduism, we find many individual gods and goddesses, some of which are described as the ‘highest’ deity. Out of advancements in the theological reflection on the relation of these deities to the universe, the notion of Brahman emerged. The various holy books of Hinduism are the oldest known literature containing pantheistic concepts (Geisler, 1989:79). They present the notion of a single, all-encompassing spiritual force that ultimately controls reality and is manifest in every living being. This force has many titles - The Supreme Being, The Eternal, or most commonly - Brahman. The Upanishads - the concluding part of theVedas - attempt to show an articulated concept of Brahman (Thompson, 1999:330). They contain higher knowledge about the self and transcendental states of awareness. They do not present Brahman from a devotional perspective - Brahman is impersonal, mysterious and supreme, a being fit for contemplation and philosophical enquiry. The literal meaning of the word Upanishad is something like “connection” or “equivalence”, which, as will become clear, is an indication to what the overall message that the texts imply. They present a vision of an interconnected universe, with a common, unifying principle behind the apparent diversity in the cosmos. There are various interpretations of the Upanishads due to the multiple darśanas (schools of thought) found within Hinduism, however all schools do have a number of beliefs in common.[1]

                       Robert Hume writes that the ancient documents of the Upanishads were one of the first recorded attempts at systematic philosophy by the Hindus, and constitutes the earliest written demonstration of those Hindu concepts that explain how the world of experience can be rationally conceived of as a whole (Hume, 1971:2). Paul Deussen wrote in 1966 that “to every Indian Brahman today the Upanishads are what the New Testament is to the Christian” (Daussen, 1966:8), and interestingly, Max Muller points out that there are more publications of the Upanishads in India than that of Descartes in Europe (Muller, 1894:39). Hume suggests that the philosophy of the Upanishads has also made an influence in the West, where many philosophers have expressed their importance (Hume, 1971:3). For example, Arthur Schopenhauer unmistakably fuses doctrines of the Upanishads into his philosophy and commented on them by saying that they were the “most rewarding and most elevating reading that there can possibly be in the world. It has been the solace of my life and will be of my death” (Cit Mascaro,1965:8).

The concept of Brahman as Ultimate Reality is expressed, in part, to show how each of us are not only connected to our fellow humans, but also to animals, plants, and on a bigger level even - the entirety of the universe and then beyond that. Haridas Chaudhuri (1954), suggests that the Upanishads have been a source of inspiration in Indian culture for centuries, and that it is the notion of the Supreme Being that has had the power to creatively absorb the diversity and influences of India’s multiple cultural systems - to allow within it the “limitless toleration” which is needed to ensure peaceful growth among all of the spiritual practices and doctrinal systems we find in India (Chaudhuri, 1954:47).

- Knowledge of Brahman in Vedanta philosophy & its thinkers.

           The Vedanta school of thought, developed from about 100 BCE onwards, holds the Upanishads as its principal texts, along with the Brahma Sutras. Modern Hindu philosophy still takes Vedanta as one of the main sources of inspiration, due to its important philosophical ideas and guidelines for meditation. Vedanta’s most prominent scholar was the mystic and philosopher Sankara, who lived approximately between 789-830CE (Lorenzen, 2005). Sankara taught that liberation for the individual could be attained first and foremost through knowledge, Jnana. Sankara’s philosophical system is referred to as Advaita-Vedanta, which is taken as a non-dualistic approach that suggests the individual human self and the Divine Self are essentially the same. Advaita-Vedanta proposes that the reality of Brahman is the only true reality, and is the all-pervading power of the universe (Dandekar, 2005). An earlier Indian thinker - Gaudapada, who taught that when one realises the illusion of apparent diversity and seeming dualities of life, pure consciousness is all that will remain, influenced Sankara’s Advaita-Vedanta (Fowler, 2002, 240-241). Vedanta attracted many other thinkers - one being Niscaldas, a North Indian monk who interestingly chose to write in Hindi as opposed to Sanskrit; rendering his writings in The Ocean of Enquiry or, Vica-Sagar, more accessible to a wider audience. However, unfortunately, because of his choice in language, his work remains unheard of to most western scholars. Niscaldas viewed his work as a handbook to liberation, which, when studied correctly was deemed sufficient enough in leading people of all backgrounds to realise their potential in the non-duality of the Self and Brahman (Allen, 2013:2-3). In choosing to write in Hindi he “felt not a trace of shame: There is a single reason for this: compassion is the crown of Dharma” (Allen, 2013:86). His choice to write in the vernacular is significant in that regarding scriptural authority, the path to liberation contains the unique factor of Sanskrit.

- The problem of language.

In ancient India, Sanskrit was the main language used by philosophers, scholars, holy women and holy men. It is the root of many modern Indian languages but unfortunately today it is only spoken by 1% of Indian people, most of whom are holy men and women. Sanskrit is sometimes referred to as Devabhasha - the language of the gods, and Hindus see it as a language composed of words that are not mere words - they are themselves eternal entities like Brahman. These entities are seen as originating from an act of divine Creation or, as simply that, which has always been and will continue to be in the future, self-sufficient and ever lasting (Deshpande, 1993:54). Amanda Wood explains that the problems which arise from interpreting the Upanishads, are not derived from overly complex grammar or long, technical words; they are found within the fact that classical Sanskrit can often causes confusion in translation due to the archaic meaning of words being forgotten. This could perhaps present a problem in that if the real meaning of the words used to describe ideas about ‘knowing Brahman’ in the Upanishads have really been lost, an analysis of how the texts speak of ‘knowing Brahman’ can never be fully complete. However, Woods adds that this is a relatively minor problem in relation to the problem of trying to understand the philosophical character of theUpanishads (Woods, 2003:1).

The notion of Brahman is one of such complexity, that a brief explanation of the main conceptions of this apparent overarching force seems appropriate. So, Etymologically, the term ‘Brahman’ means the Great, the Supreme, and it expresses the Hindu view of the true nature of reality. As the purpose of the Upanishads is essentially to stimulate contemplation and reflection, they often raise the philosophical issue of how words are used and what they really mean. In particular, commonplace words like “true”, “self”, “world”, “this” or “that” are open to intense scrutiny and interpretation precisely due to the fact that the Upanishads use these words in a way that subjects them to questioning.

This then, poses another question about how the Upanishads can be used as a source for knowing Brahman - if the words that are used to suggest the notion of Brahman can be put up for questioning, does this in turn question the notion of Brahmanaltogether? It seems this might be the case, however theUpanishads make clear that they are aware of this issue, and explain numerous times that Brahman cannot be learned through reading or writing. To know Brahman is to be Brahman. To experience Ultimate Reality. The issue of what kind of language theUpanishads use seems to be diminished however, when returning to the fact that the true meanings of those ancient Sanskrit words have been lost.

- Ways to conceptualise the notion of Brahman.

We can however, try to understand one main factor within the concept of Brahman, which is that it is said to have two interconnected modes of existence: Nirguna Brahman and Saguna Brahman - impersonal and personal, indeterminable and self-determining. Nirguna Brahman has been interpreted in different ways - Sankara’s Advaita-Vedanta school regards it as devoid of characteristics and attributes, whereas according to Ramanuja’s Vaishnavism, Nirguna Brahman, although is thought to have supernatural attributes - such as absolute beauty and truth, is free from natural and sensuous qualities. Vaishnavism also regards Nirguna Brahman as the spiritual pervasiveness and self-luminosity of the Supreme personality. Saguna Brahman is seen as the Supreme spirit which is understood as having the universal principles needed for certain cosmic functions such as creation, dissolution and maintenance (Nikhilananda and Sankaracarya, 1949:25-31). There is also an interpretation from Chaudhuri, which emerges as a nexus of both Sankara and Ramanuja’s ideas. This interpretation holds Nirguna Brahman as the supra-cosmic poise of being of Sanguna Brahman (Ghose, 1951:287-288). So, in in this way of looking at it, Nirguna Brahman is what sustains Sanguna Brahman. This interpretation only indicates the inexhaustible richness of content that the concept of Brahman holds and also alludes to the idea that, as presented in the Upanishads, knowing Brahman through understanding it’s multiple parts is not an easy task.

In its indeterminable aspect, Brahman is the great Silence, in that it exceeds all the verbalised expressions of human beings and surpasses logical conception. And the Upanishads explain how no notion or philosophical system can allow one access to the inner essence of Brahman. The Taittriya Upanishad 2.9 asserts that “Words and mind go to him, but reach him not and re-turn” (Mascaro, 1965:110). This could lead one along the path of thinking that this is almost a type of agnosticism - in that not being able to find a definite understanding proves confusing and frustrating, however this is not the case - although Brahman is unavailable to us through rational thought or empirical definitions, it is possible for one, through transcending the intellect, to discover a direct vision of Brahman. This apprehension of Brahman is called knowledge-by-being or knowledge-by-identity in the Taittriya. What this means that one can only realise Brahman by becoming one with Brahman. Hindu’s believe those terms such as Pure being, Pure consciousness and Pure joy are the closest way to rationally conceive of the nature of Brahman. This infinite being-consciousness-joy (sat-sit-ananda) is said to be the “primordial manifestation of Brahman in the intelligible sphere” (Chaudhuri, 1954:48).

- ‘Knowing Brahman’ through applications in modern science and the concept of truth.

Interestingly, Varanasi Ramabrahmam interprets this threefold sat-cit-ananda through reflecting upon the methods of modern science. He believes that the nature and mode of energy transformations implied by the notion of sat-cit-ananda can quite easily be understood by using concepts in physics, electronics and communication engineering. The Upanishads put forwards the notion of Atma-jnana, or Self-knowledge. Ramabrahmam expresses the view that Atma-jnana could be seen as a sort of “software” that is needed for dealing with things such as structure, function and control in the mind. Atma jnana touches upon the origin of psychic and mental energy as well as mental time-space. Ramabrahmam suggests that we can view Brahman as a sort of bio-oscillator - generating energy that pulses throughout the cosmos, enabling us to know, perceive, understand and be aware of, without it self ever changing. Brahman, with its attributes as Sat (essence, being or truth) implies the permanent existence of absolute reality, and the understanding that things in the perceived world are not, or rather, cannot, be ultimately real or true because everything in this perceived world is subject to time - everything is in a state of flux, from solid objects to ideas and thoughts (Seshagiri, 1970:377-382). With characteristics of Chit, Brahman allows us to perceive the world around us, and Ananda gives us the ability to be aware. In this way, ‘knowing Brahman’ could emerge from an understanding of these three characteristics as proposed by the Upanishads to be the product of atma-jnana.

Ramabrahmam is not alone in his interpretation of Upanishadicthought through a scientific lense. Sangeetha Menon also interprets the Upanishads through a modern scientific framework by focusing on how Hinduism as a religion has “coexisted with scientific pursuits” (Menon, 2008:1). She explains how Hinduism originates from a time when the possibilities of first hand human experience were the cardinal issues. Everything was understood within the context of these experiences, by a culture that viewed the subjective as a necessary component required in creating the objective. She says that even though Hinduism is a religion of many counterparts, it fundamentally represents a pluralistic philosophy. One which is tolerant and willing to include and integrate ideas and beliefs, after all, it is a living and growing religion. According to Menon, this means that Hindus must have the ability to push the limits of the dimension in which Brahman is known by incorporating new ideas whilst leaving the order of the religious system itself undisturbed (Menon, 2008:2).

The primal beliefs and principles in Hinduism help guide contemporary Hindus to involve themselves with all the issues that concern humankind - this necessarily includes issues of a scientific nature. These fundamental principles include an acceptance of diverse views; the ideal of nonviolence (ahimsa), the importance placed on living a life that is guided by detachment and reflection (saskhibhava), the ideal of truth (satya), and meditation (Thompson, 1999).

Satya (truth) is something that Science also claims to be in the business of, and it is a word which most of us use in everyday conversation, assuming we know what we mean by it. However, truth is a strange concept, with implications for metaphysical, spiritual, epistemic and ethical definitions. In Hinduism, the pursuit of Truth is a fundamental factor in gaining knowledge of Brahman. Menon describes how there is an “uncompromising connection” between on the one hand, how we think about truth, and on the other, how it is actually practiced in everyday waking life, which can make it a problematic value for the Hindu to try and live by. However, Menon says that if any notions of God and Truth seem incompatible, the Hindu will choose truth (Menon, 2003:3). However this seems to be a misinterpretation of what ‘truth’ means for the Hindu. Knowing the Truth, is, in essence, what it means to know Brahman. Thus there cannot really be any conflict between the two concepts because they are essentially the same. The Isavasya Upanishad says that the “face of the Truth is covered by a golden disc” and the Mundaka Upanishad says that “Truth alone prevails”. For the Hindu, means of knowing the truest Truth depend upon inner transformation, ontological insights and reflection whereas for the Scientist, finding out the truth depends upon objective experiments and evidence. However, the two are not without some connection. If we look at the Intricate Hindu diagrams of altars and Temples, we find that what they represent is extremely complex geometry, which in turn implies that Hinduism is a culture which doesn’t see ‘doing science’ as this kind of objective endeavour, but rather as an integrated part of ritualistic experience. For example the foundations of Hindu Temples are appointed by intricate geomantic rites, which are designed to specifically ensure the building becomes the proper microcosm it was intended to be (Rowland, 1967: 166-167).  The Hindus of the Vedic period developed this mathematics, along with astronomy, linguistics and metaphysics to help them during rituals. They created a system known as the six limbs of Veda (Vedanga). The Veganda’s cover six areas of study : (1) Siksa (instruction), which explains how to articulate and produncicate the Vedic texts correctly. (2) Chandas(verses) of the Vedic texts. (3) Vyakarana (Analysis and derivation), in this discipline, the Grammar of the Vedas is explained. (4) Niruka(Etymology) (5) Jyotisa (astronomy/astrology) which was used to specify the correct time for ritual, and finally (6) Kalpa (Manuals for rituals) (Webster, 1995). What connects the Vedas, Upanishads and other Hindu texts is, that in each interpretation, the same importance is attributed to the scientific pursuit of knowledge of both Brahman and higher and lower realities (Menon, 2014:4).

Chapter 2

- Spiritual freedom.

The notion of our ability to be aware of these higher and lower realities can also be found in the idea of spiritual freedom. If we take the notion proposed by Sankara and the Vedanta school of Hinduism, that individuality is merely a manifestation of the same basic reality as universality, questions can be raised concerning the goal of the individual - the summum bonum of Kant (Kant & Abbott, 1788:92). For Hindu philosophers, the answer lies in the notion of spiritual freedom (mukti). To attain spiritual freedom is to be freed from ignorance, and to perceive the Truth directly - then one will have reached the goal of life. Mukti implies complete dissolution of emotional attachments and freedom from perceived polarities such as love and hate, pleasure and pain and attraction and repulsion - thus attaining mental equilibrium (samata). Chaudhuri explains how mukti implies a conscious awareness of the union with Brahman and the concept as a involves a type of transformation or reorganisation of one’s inner dialogue and world-view in light of the knowledge gained from experiencing the Supreme Truth (Chaudhuri, 1954:54). It’s important to note that this transformation is not a new or foreign condition - it is merely recognising our innermost essence, which we have forgotten and become disconnected from. Realisation is already within us, as atman is the eternal, permanent essence of our being. The problem is that due to identifications of the not-self with the Self, we have doubts and non-realisation. When the not-self is removed the Self remains alone. The question of how shall one reach the Self is answered simply by saying that there is no ‘reaching’ the self. If it were to involve reaching, it would imply that it is not there now, but it is. Thus the Self is already obtained, one must just realise this to attain spiritual freedom and become one with the Absolute (Herman, 1991; 13-14). It should be noted that in the West, understandings of ‘the absolute’ are very different from the concept of The Absolute as presented in the Upanishads. In the West, philosophical understandings of the absolute usually consist of either a denial of anything comparable to it, or as a sort of human construct which unifies the world of distinctions and relations. Herbert Spencer explained how if we view the absolute to be a denial of the relative, it is rendered completely unknown and unknowable  (www.iep.utm.edu, 2015). However, if the concept of the Absolute is used to explain the essential identity of the self, suggesting that it is the ultimate truth of both the relative and finite world, then it would seem that to conceptualise of it as a denial of the relative, would not advocate the same kind of meaning. This is made clear in the Chandongya Upanishad 3.14. When its declared that “Saravm khalvidam Brahman” (All this is indeed Brahman), what this seems to imply is not that the self-contained and self-existent, finite world is unreal but, that it the truth is hidden behind it, and it’s essence is essentially just a manifestation of Brahman. Brahman is not unknown but not unknowable, and stands as the fundamental condition of all knowledge being potentially be realised. Brahman as an objective construct cannot be known to the mind, but with supra-intellectual experience (turiya or samadhi) one can realise the truth, and consequently realise Brahman (Chaudhuri, 1952:57).

- Brahman as the controller of perceived reality and what is known.

Throughout the Upanishads, the notion that the Supreme Being ultimately controls all that we perceive, is paramount in understanding the nature of reality. The Isopanisad mentions this and it’s also apparent in the Bhagavad-gita (9.10) when it is declared “As heat and light are distributed all around by a fire situated in one place, so the whole creation is a manifestation of energies expanded from the Supreme Being” (Cit Prabhupada, 1998). What this seems to be saying is that, like the sun, Brahman stays in one place, unchanging, but it’s light and heat are distributed throughout the universe. Sometimes a cloud covers the sun, or at night it is out of view, but this doesn’t mean that it has ceased to burn - we must just wait until nature reveals it to us once again. The Isopanishadand the Bhagavad-gita are expressing how this world of matter is just small portion of the spiritual world - which is sometimes hidden or covered over by material energy to create the illusion that it is not there. In order to know Brahman, one must realise that material energy is really just a different form of spiritual energy - for example, clouds are a product of the sun, yet they can hide it from us. We must just wait for the wind to move the cloud in order to see the light (Parabhupada, 1998:17).

- Purusha and prakriti.

So then, another question arises; what constitutes spiritual energy? The Bhagavad-gita (7.5) explains, “Beyond my inferior, material energy, is another energy which is spiritual. It comprises the living entities” (Cit Parabhupada, 1991). So, human beings are energy - energy that is spiritual. But why is this energy superior to material energy? Well, if we think of how the material world is, it seems agreeable to say that matter is something which can’t function of it’s own accord, whereas living beings do. What this means that we are capable of manipulating things. Thus the difference between spiritual and material energy and why the Gita explains the concepts as superior and inferior is that; matter can not manipulate us, but we can manipulate matter. We can imagine this by thinking about how well the most top of the range sports car can drive on the roads, but without a driver it is useless. However, it seems what this notion is trying to convey isn’t really a matter of spiritual energy being superior to material energy. As stated earlier, material energy is essentially made up of the same stuff as spiritual energy - since everything in both the material and spiritual world is a manifestation of Brahman. This notion can prove a little confusing as it seems to be a dualist concept being understood through a framework of monism, which is due to the early Upanishadic dualist approach to reality as conceived as a world with two realities - the higher and the lower - prakriti and purusha - the spiritual and the material. Knowing Brahman is recognising Brahman in every part of life and by experiencing the harmony of these dualities (Menon, 2014:4).

In Sankhya Philosophy, prakriti is used to explain the evolution of the universe (Dhavamony & Sundararajan, 2003:407). It is defined as that primal matter, the ultimate cosmic energy, or the material cause of the universe, and can also be understood as everything that is not the True Self - Brahman. However it is important to note that this differs depending on the interpretation in each Darsana system. Prakriti is the source of the five elements, known as Panchamahabutas - earth, fire, water, air and ether. These elements constitute the makeup of all beings in the world, which are the product of the union between atman (purusha in Sankhya philosophy) and prakriti. Prakriti is composed of three essential attributes, known as the Gunas. The first - Sattva (creation), represents qualities like goodness, harmony and balance. The second - Rajas (preservation) represents the attributes of passion, restlessness and activity. And the third - Tamas (destruction), represents qualities like laziness and dullness. These Gunas are said to explain the attributes of material energy and, since the Hindu view is that the mind is a subtle form of matter, determine and individual’s character (Pandit, 2005:62-63). The Vedas present a classification of individuals according to their Gunas, known as theVarna system[2]. The qualities described in the Varna system are all dependent on the manifestation of prakriti in the individual; this is explained in the Bhagavad Gita 4.13 as such:

“According to the three modes of material nature and the work associated with them, the four divisions of human society are created by Me. And although I am the creator of this system, you should know that I am yet the nondoer, being unchangeable” (Cit Prabhupada, 1998).

This apparently paradoxical passage seems to be implying that the union between prakriti and purusha suggests the underlying, perfect unity of all existence - the Brahman of the Upanishads.

- The notion of the self and the ‘best life’ in the Katha Upanishad & Plato’s Phaedrus.

Although this perfect unity of Brahman is at the very core of the philosophy of the Upanishads, there does seem to be a kind of relative difference between individual human beings and the Supreme Being from an objective point of view. The Isopanisadmakes clear the difference by describing the Supreme Being as “that greatest of all, who is unembodied and omniscient”. Thus implying we are different from The Supreme Being, in part, because we are embodied. This then would seem to suggest the notion that we are in a body, not that we are bodies. The Supreme Being is said to be eternal, and thus remembers everything. We however, because embodied, are subject to age and time, and have forgotten the truth, which, according to the belief in reincarnation, is that we change bodies every time we are re-born. According to the Isopanisad, this is why we have forgotten who we really are. Our bodies get tired and eventually become inactive. However, in dreams when we sleep we can become anything and anyone. The Isopanisad explains that similarly to dreams, in each new life we create a different environment. I may be an Indian or and American, a butterfly or a bull. In dreams we have no fixed position. The Isopanisad teaches that if we take this information and use it to create a meaningful understanding of life, we can develop pure consciousness, and after death need not return in another body - we return to, and combine with the Supreme Being in pure bliss, and are consumed by knowledge and eternity. So it seems that the Isopanisad is saying that human life is essentially meant for developing our consciousness in order to know the Self and in turn know Brahman (Parabhupada, 1991:31).  

To gain knowledge about the Self (and thus Brahman) then, one could also look to the Katha Upanishad, which delivers an interesting dialogue between Naciketas - a man who wishes to understand the status of the self after death - and the god of death himself, Yama. Yama explains to Naciketas that one way view the individual could be through the analogy of a chariot. Yama compares the body to the chariot itself, the intellect to the charioteer, the mind to the reins, the senses to the horses and the object of the senses to the road. Interestingly this notion of a chariot-self is not unique to the Upanishads, as in Plato’s Phaedrus, Socrates describes the soul as a winged chariot, by which a charioteer drives two horses. In Plato’s example, the two horses are distinguished by their inner traits; on the one hand we have the horse who is “on the more honorable side”, who has a calm temper and is obedient and aims for glory, and on the other hand we have the “hot-blooded” horse, who aims at the satisfaction of sensual desires. These two horses remarkably reflect the Chariot expressed by Death in the Katha Upanishad, and Elisabeth Schlitz suggests that both expressions are representative of a move toward a more internal way of conceiving of the individual, and provides an image of the self that effectively justifies the ‘best life’ (Schlitz, 2006:451).

The Philosophical issue of identifying, and more specifically, justifying what the ‘best life’ may entail is central to many of Plato’s dialogues including Phaedrus, the Republic and the Gorgias. In the Gorgias, Socrates puts forward a view which renders nature (phusis), and convention as necessarily opposed. He asserts that the rule of superior and inferior is needed for “natural justice”. He promotes a life where the individual sees himself as wise, powerful and strong, who “accomplishes his intentions without flagging through weakness of soul,” and Callicles asserts that an individual should see himself as superior and should aim to increase the satisfaction of desires, according to “nature’s own law,” and that to moderate one’s desires is for “simpletons” (Woodhead, 1961). Plato portrays Socrates as the one who wanders the path of knowledge and isn’t really concerned with desires, whereas Callicles is the one who believes that virtue in its truest form, comes in the successful pursuit of extravagant gratification and pleasure (Schlitz, 2006:452). Whilst the conceptualisation of the dialogues presented in both the Katha Upanishad and Plato’s Gorgias differ considerably, a bundle of essential, similar questions are raised; What do we ought to pursue in life? and what, if any, reasons are there for one to view the path of wisdom as better than a life concerned with the pursuit of sensual desires?

           In the Katha Upanishad, when asked about the status of the self, Yama attempts to avoid the question by trying to distract Nachiketas with an offer of worldly riches and “any wishes in the world of mortals, however how hard to obtain”. Nachiketas replies by rejecting the offer because pleasures are transient and “weaken the power of life” (Mascaro, 1965:57). This response presents an argument which is opposed to the life of desires, in regards to the likening of pleasures with what is seen as ‘good’. However Schlitz thinks that Nachiketas’ awareness of the ephemeral nature of sensual desires alone, fails to propose a full rebuttal of Yamas perspective. Nachiketas seems to acknowledge the fact that if Yama had instead offered him an eternal life of pleasure, things would have been different and maybe even tempting enough for him to accept. He says ; “When a mortal here on earth has felt his own immortality, could he wish for a long life of pleasures, for the lust of deceitful beauty?” (Mascaro, 1965:57). This seems to suggest, much like the Platonic texts, that it is not the continuance of sensual desires, or the fact they are transient, but that the effects, and pursuit of, are, in some way, fundamentally opposed to living the “best” life, to knowing Brahman (Schlitz, 2006:445).

Following Nachiketas’ rejection of Yamas offer on the basis that bodily desires and the satisfaction of which, are ephemeral, Yama puts forwards an account that presents the problem as residing in the fact that sensual desires fundamentally lack value for the self. It becomes apparent here that Yama and Nachiketas are kind of on the same page, when Yama suggests that one shouldn’t choose a life of pleasure because it represents a direct rejection of a life in pursuit of knowledge, “which the wise man chooses”. Yama continues by again presenting the choice in regards to the two different lives. So, on the one hand we have the life of ignorance, whose object is pleasure, and devotees of which, “thinking themselves wise and learned, go aimlessly hither and thither, like the blind led by the blind”, and on the other hand we have the path of knowledge, whose object is in the good: ultimate knowledge of the self, and in turn the One Self, Brahman. The Katha Upanishadexplains how “the wise man chooses the path of joy; the fool takes the path of pleasure”. Thus It becomes apparent that the outcomes of each path are entirely different, and the one who chooses the path of wisdom will “rest his mind in contemplation on our God beyond time, who invisibly dwells in the mystery of things and in the heart of man, then rises above pleasures and sorrow” (Mascaro, 1965:58-59).

Yama goes on to consider the nature of the self, in light of the value of knowledge. He introduces the fundamental principle which allows for an understanding of the goal of life, which is to realise that there is a self that is higher than all others - Atman. This higher self is distinct from the body and it’s senses; “he does not die when the body dies”, resides in all living things; “concealed in the heart of all beings is the Atman”, and is immortal; “Never-born and eternal, beyond times gone or to come”. Yama explains to Nachiketas that “not even through deep knowledge can the Atman be reached” (Mascaro, 1965:59), implying that to choose the path of wisdom is a precondition of recognising the truth itself. He continues, through the use of the chariot image, by stressing the interdependence of the parts of an individual. In Yama’s explanation, the mind and body are presented as dependant on the intellect in order for one to find good direction;

“He who has not right understanding and whose mind is never steady is not the ruler his life, like a bad driver with wild horses. But he who has right understanding and whose mind is ever steady is the ruler of his life, like a good diver with well-trained horses. He who has not right understanding, is careless and never pure, reaches no the End of the journey; but wanders on from death to death. But he who has understanding, is careful and ever pure, reaches the End of the journey, from which he never returns. The man whose chariot is driven by reason, who watches and holds the reins of his mind, reaches the End of the journey, the supreme everlasting Spirit”(Mascaro, 1965:60-61).

So, the intellect as the charioteer is paramount to none in successfully attaining knowledge of the Self and in turn knowledge of Brahman, as it controls the senses - and thus controls desire - so that one doesn’t become distracted by the material world, and instead turns inward towards Atman, towards Brahman.

Chapter 3

- Brahman’s Unity of Being.

In Hinduism, the idea that there are multiple paths leading to a single truth is expressed through its many gods and goddesses, and also through the Unity of Being that brings them together. Ganesha, Hanuman and Sarasw are all examples of deities who represent the unity of Being. The Upanishads, through deep and meaningful spiritual language, examine the nature of human perception in the context of the Unity of Being, the limitations of language, and the infinite existence of the Universe. In the Kena Upanishad, it says that “We know not, we cannot understand, how he can be explained : He is above the known and above the unknown” (Mascaro, 1965:51). In this way, we are pointed towards viewing Hinduism as a spiritual system that recognises the limits of human beings and allows room for doubt, as opposed to a system that only offers certainty. This leads us to be able to conceive of the universe and Brahman as that which allows for diversity and dialogue - which is further reflected in the bright and complementary stories of gods and goddesses in hinduism - and can help mould us into well-rounded people (Kasturi, Viswanath, Kilwan & Narine, 2014:36). The Unity of Being, according to the Indian Philosophers, always remains the same, however each deity is representative of its diverse manifestations. The Mahopanishad holds the belief ofVasudhaiva Kutumbakam - ‘The world is one family’ (Chatterdee, 2005). And a similar idea appears in the Bhagavad Gita - “When a man sees all the variety of things as existing in one, and all as emanating from that, then he achieves harmony with Brahman” (Cit Prabhupada, 1998). The Divine Unity of Being therefore penetrates through everything. The Hindu greeting ‘Namaskaar’ also shows us how this notion really is one of the most important - translating to “I salute your form”. This is because of the belief that people, gods, animals and flowers are a product of the same existential space and originate from the same divine source - Brahman (Kasturi, Viswanath, Kilwan & Narine, 2014:37) In this way both the Bhagavad Gita and the Mahopanishad show how we can know Brahman through knowing our connection with all living beings.

- A shared consciousness.

This brings us to another interesting topic - the idea that animals, plants, people and gods share the same consciousness. To understand this we must first understand that sometimes there can be confusion between the concepts of mind and consciousness in Hindu philosophy, and to find a distinction between the two, we can look to the Aitareya Upanishad (3.1.2). This Upanishad explains how consciousness is the real knower and the mind is just another sense organ. The Aitareya sets out how various functions of the mind are classified within three categories - cognition, affection and conation[3]. Sangeetha Menon explains how all these attributes are recognised as the functions of consciousness. These are further analysed in the Kena Upanishad when it is explained how they are transformed into knower (praajna), intellect (prajna), and cognition (prajnana). It begins with an inquiry into what it is that underpins the psychophysical functions of thought, breath, speech, vision and action (Menon, 2014:7). Questions are raised about how the mind can think, who regulates breath, if the senses are autonomous, and how can the mouth, ear and eye enable us to speak, hear and see. In true Upanishadic form, the response presented first in the Kena Upanishad - “It is the ear of the ear, the eye of the eye, and the word of words, the mind of mind and the life of life” (Sharvananda, 1932), sheds little light on what these questions are trying to answer. However, further on in the Kena Upanishad it is said that it is Consciousness which is behind all of these things.  Psychophysical functions can never know this however, because Consciousness is not only beyond what is known, but also what is unknown, it is beyond the grasp of knowledge and also ignorance. Yohan Grinshpon explains this as Upanishadic knowledge being “a renunciation of inferiority along with its vessel; it is transcendence of the very condition of inferiority” (Grinshpon, 2003). Consciousness is further defined in the Kena (2.4) as that “which comes to the thought of those who know him beyond thought.” This seems to be getting at the idea that Consciousness, aka Brahman is the fundamental requirement in making cognition and experience possible. Thus it cannot be explained by these means. The Kena Upanishad further speaks about this - “There the eye cannot go, nor can speech reach” (Mascaro, 1965:51), and the Brahadaranyaka Upanishad (3.4.2) says “you cannot see the seer of seeing, you cannot hear the hearer of hearing, you cannot think of the thinker of thinking, you cannot understand one who understands understanding” (Menon, 2006:16). Paul Deussen suggests that these types of Upanishadic statements are basically cleverly constructed to present the opposite predicates of distance, nearness, repose and movement. They are attributed to Brahman in a way that mutually cancels out each other and thus attend only to exemplify the impossibility of knowing Brahman through empirical definitions (Deussen 1966:149).

- Sensory experience, mystical experience and defending the notion of Brahman.

So then, if not through empirical definitions, how does one conceive of Brahman, and also know that what you’re conceiving of really is Ultimate Reality? In his article Could there be Mystical Evidence for a Non Dual Brahman? A Causal Objection, Stephen Phillips (2001) attempts to analyse the question of if experience alone can count as evidence for a spiritual monism. He explains how he thinks that this question is a lot more philosophically interesting than - does Vedantic scripture have truth or not? because this approach will yield better results, as the fact of the matter is, that sensory experience is how we know the world, whereas scripture only ever faces the same, well-known refutations regarding etymology and the like (Phillips, 2001:493). Phillips’ reading of Sankara’s work is fueled by two things : that the Upanishads are not only the main source of inspiration for, but also a guide to, certain ‘mystic endeavours’, and because of this, he postulates that Vedanta philosophy itself is mystical. Much Eastern philosophy is taught in terms of possible experiences. Experiences, which are available to all. Sankara’s Vedanta views Brahman-knowledge as the Supreme good (parama - purusartha), which is understood to be a state of consciousness that is available to a person whilst still within the cycle of death and rebirth (jivan-mukti), through mystical experience. A Self-realisation, Brahman-knowledge, Enlightenment experience is said to be of the utmost value to humans, and worth considerable sacrifice. Mystical experience has proven to be of interest not only to the philosophy of religion in the East, but in the west as well. Since The Enlightenment, where logic and reason became the superior tools over mysticism and belief based on faith (Schmit, 2006:242). Thus the attitude in the west became one which immediately faulted any belief based on that which had insufficient evidence to reinforce it. This created a space for psychology to try and understand why people are likely to believe, even though there is a lack of evidence. What this has to do with mystical experience, is, that if someone experiences something that can be shown to be a way of attaining knowledge of Brahman, then the evidentiary objection to religious belief would be dismantled. Phillips thinks that by showing such a knowledge source, there is sufficient, and maybe even enough worth, to defend the possibility of there being a belief about Brahman that has its foundation in truth. The key and most problematic part of this however, is that only she who has a mystical experience, and those, who have a similar conceptual understanding of mystical experience, hear her testimony, would have access to this evidence (Phillips, 2001:494).

It seems important to ask the question of what is a mystical experience? and what makes someone a mystic? But it seems that no one person has been able to define it in a conceptually satisfying way. In The Encyclopedia of Science and Religion, Jensine Andresen (2003) defines it as that which is “defined in contradistinction to so-called ordinary or mundane experience” (Andresen, 2003: 585), whereas, although acknowledging the fact that it doesn’t cover all uses of the term, Phillips explains it as “a psychological event of indefinite duration that a mystic subject takes herself to be a direct awareness of such a spiritual object as Brahman”(Phillips, 2001:494). Phillips thinks his definition leaves issues like if Brahman actually exists, and if the mystic is right in assuming the experience to be a direct vision of Brahman, on neutral grounds.

Chapter 4

- Phillips’ parallelism thesis.

Phillips attempts to show, through an attempt at reading Sankara’s philosophy from the position of Sankara himself - that mystical knowledge of Brahman, arises from the preexistent reality of Brahman. This could be understood by seeing it as similar to the way in which sensory knowledge arises from sensory connections - with preexistent sensory objects. Phillips seems to think that this analogy works well in trying to understand the concept of Brahman-knowledge through experience, however that it suffers tension within Vedanta metaphysics, in that they fail to give a causal account of mystical experience. Phillips thinks that this issue is rooted in the Vedanta concept of Brahman, rather than the mysticism that is integral to the Vedanta movement in general (Phillips, 2001:495).

In the commentary on the Brahma-sutra 1.1.2, Sankara says that mystical experience is an epistemic foundation for inquiry into Brahman:

           “Unlike inquiry into dharma, the method of investigation or means of knowledge whereby Brahman-inquiry proceeds is not merely scripture and the general principles of understanding sentences. Rather, the method here is scripture along with experience et cetera, as may be required depending on the question or issue. For Brahma-inquiry culminates in an experience. Furthermore, Brahman is as an experiential object, something preexistent” (The Brahma-sutras according to Sankara Translated by Phillips, 2001).

What this seems to be saying is that to inquire into Brahman, is an experience of Brahman itself and that Brahman pre exists mystic discovery. Phillips interprets this in a way that is parallel to the way that sensory objects pre exist sensory experience. However, it seems that Sankara fails to out rightly say that scripture is authoritative based on mystical experiences, and says only that it has authority in its own sphere. This leads Phillips to ponder why Sankara fails to assert a metaphysical thesis regarding theUpanishads containing mystic claims[4]. It should be noted however, that Sankara does say that scripture allows us to see Brahman as intrinsically a subject - a subject which is basically the same as us, and to aid us in realising this (Phillips, 2011:496). Furthermore, one of the most important ideas in the Upanishadic scriptures and more generally in mystic practice is this concept of non dual self-awareness. This is the belief that there is an awareness that is innate to itself, one which has no need for ‘sense’ because it senses itself. This is what the Upanishads conceptualise Brahman to be. Philips goes on to say that from this self-illumination, an epistemological consequence can be postulated; because nondual self awareness is self-illuminating (swayam-prakasamana), it is also self-authenticating (sva-pramanya) - because nothing exists outside of it to have authority over it. So, Phillips understands this consequence, and does not have any issues with it. However, the thesis that Brahman is a single and supreme reality, with all diversity being its being, is much more problematic - a problem which Phillips thinks can be seen in the different ways of interpreting Sankara’s ideas in the sub schools of Advaita (Phillips, 2001:497). He outlines the first position as a kind of skepticism. Due to spiritual ignorance, the relation Brahman has to the world is unknown and unknowable, Phillips says, at very least in an explanatory sense.

For Advaitins, things seem to exist independently of Brahman, however, this is merely an attempt at meaningfully conceptualising of the world and Brahman through language, which Philips thinks holds within it a indeterminate, intellectually ontological position - much like the object of an illusion (Phillips, 2001:498). He acknowledges that this is in part what the nature of Brahman is - a complicated and confusing composition of abstract ideas, which in reality, according to the Upanishads, will lead us no closes to realising the truth of Brahman’s essential nature. Sankara, however, provides us with a suggestion of this in Brahma-sutra-bhasya (1.1.4.)[5], however, interestingly, Philips interprets it as an existential statement, because the statement presents Brahman either by contrast “Eternal”etc, or by relation to humans and the world - “all knowing” etc. Another passage, from Sankara’s commentary on Brahma-sutra (1.1.1), explains that: “Knowledge (or awareness) of Brahman is not dependent on a person’s action, but is rather, dependent on a real thing, like cognition of the real things that are the objects of such means of knowledge as sense experience,” and his point again is reiterated further in the commentary. If we look at these passages in context, it appears as the end of a long and complicated argument against a Mimasaka Upanishadic interpretation. This interpretation views the Vedicscriptures as being more valuable and important than experience, and thus Vedanta, finding its foundational beliefs in the Upanishadic verses regarding experience of Brahman as knowingBrahman would be seen as subordinate. Sankara seems to be rejecting this view as the Upanishads teach nothing of Dharma, they teach knowledge - knowledge of Brahman which is a product of Brahman itself being a pre existing reality - not the actions of human beings. Brahman is said to exists without human knowledge or mystical awareness and so to it exists without human action. Phillips brings this back to the statements made about Brahman in the Upanishads, and implies that they shouldn’t be viewed as injunctions like the Vedic ideas about right action, but rather as descriptions, due to the fact that Brahman pre-exists such practices, much like the way sensory objects pre-exist sensory perceptions (Phillips, 2001:498).

So Sankara seems to have acknowledged the Mimamsa idea that to inquire into Brahman, one must to understand the acts of religious duty or dharma, but suggests that that understanding dharma is a prerequisite for Brahman-knowledge. Thus again the sensory analogy can be drawn, this time however, with its emphasis on the conditions regarding human beings which must be met - regardless of if the object is of sensory or mystical experience - even though they are pre-existent and independent of human knowledge. An example of this in practice could be as follows. In order for me to see the apple in the bowl in front of me, certain things must be in place like, being in the vicinity of the bowl, having my eyes open etc, before the apple can allow an apple-perception experience even though the conditions and the objects pre-exist that perception.

So, from the claim that Brahman-knowledge is made possible by the pre-existent reality of Brahman itself, Phillips draws a mystic epistemic parallelism: Brahman allows mystical awareness of Brahman (according to certain conditions) just as sensory objects give rise to sensory perceptions (under certain circumstances)(Phillips, 2001:498).

- Self-awareness.

However, it seems that even this is an incomplete understanding, even if one experiences the mystical awareness of Brahman, how does one really know that it is true? Phillips then discusses a different side to the sensory analogy that concerns the nature of a truth condition on knowledge, or true awareness. Truth is important if we are saying that knowledge of Brahman is made true by the reality of Brahman as the knowledge of a sensory object is made true by the object’s reality. Philips interprets this as Sankara discussing the psychological event of experiencing an apple, not the proposition that somewhere in the world an apple exists. Here it seems Sankara is saying that cognitions such as Brahman-cognition,implies a reality, which is preexistent to all realities. Phillips thinks this can be elaborated upon by saying that this pre-existent reality can be viewed as a veridical cognitive cause (Phillips, 2001:499). We can understand this by saying that the apple is green, in part, simply because the apple exists and the state in which it exists appears to us to be green. The important thing to note is the truth-relation - is the apple really green? as opposed to the causal relations - why is the apple green? Sankara says that the truth of true cognitions is subject to the truths they imply. Thus it is Brahman who makes a mystical Brahman-knowledge experience true, just as a pre existing apple makes the true perceptual cognition ‘an apple’. Phillips thinks that from this we can see why Sankara rejects the Mimamsa interpretation of the Upanishads: Brahman-knowledge is more like sense perception than like correctly understanding dharma.

It is important to note that Phillips says that Brahman-knowledgeisn’t actually sensory - rather it is similar to sense experience in epistemic, relevant ways, and Sankara himself makes this claim in order to ensure the sense analogy is not misinterpreted or misunderstood.

From this, Philips find that the direct vision of Brahman underpins Sankara’s Brahman thesis in a similar way to which our sense experience underpins beliefs about objects within our proximal physical environment (Phillips, 2001:501). In alignment with this apparent parallelism thesis of Sankara’s, it would seem that a mystic could claim that her direct experience of Brahman evidences her claims about Brahman. The question of if this has much strength can be answered by referring to the sensory analogy; in that sense experience might be legitimised in support of sensory claims, so mystical experience might be legitimised in support of mystical claims, namely, that one has experienced Brahman.

- Non-dual Brahman - a causal objection.

Phillips attempts to show how, through analysis of Advaita’ssuggestions about Brahman, we fail to understand how the reality of Brahman could give rise to mystical knowledge of Brahman, thus dismantling the apparent parallelism thesis. He begins by explaining how the possibility of perceptual knowledge depends on a causal connection to the thing which we are trying to perceive. He says that in Hindu philosophy, often the decisions made as to what is true or not is dependant upon its causal relations, but that the actual process of doing this is in itself is very complex, perhaps because it is apparent that sometimes, when we perceive something, we just assume it to be the truth because we trust our brain and cognitive functions to work properly. However, sometimes what we seem perceive is actually an illusion, for example a mirage in the desert on a hot day. When we realise that what we perceive is not the truth, only then we begin to look for faults - to look for what is the cause of the illusion. If we look for the cause but fail to get what we want, it would be hard to say that you could explain the illusion through causalities. Phillips thinks that this is where the problem arises that Advaita fails to tell the causal story of Brahman’s pre-existing reality giving rise to Brahman-knowledge. He says that Brahman is unable to play the part of a cause because of its all-inclusive unity, since the logic of the concept “gives rise to” implies a different between cause and effect; “the causal relation is asymmetric and irreflexive and thus is not identical” (Phillips, 2002:503).

Referring back to the idea that Advaita Brahman thesis is divided into ontology, psychology and cosmology, Phillips says there are no issues with the psychological response a mystic would give to the charge of causal disanalogy, which would be something like - Brahman is self-illuminating, self-aware and nondual. Brahman knowledge is unlike sensory knowledge because it holds to distinctions between subject and object.

Phillips wants to know how Brahman’s Unity of Being can give rise to Brahman-knowledge through an experience that has the Unity of Being as its content. He asks : “is the mystic to experience Brahman’s identity with every blade of grass and grain of sand?”, and “how could omniscience be experience?’ And as the Nyayaschool of Hinduism explains, Brahman’s Unity is discovered by inference in a teleological suggestion that does not depend on the Unity of Being being directly perceived. Phillips thinks that it’s hard to imagine omnisciences as being the object of a human beings intention, as our existence is finite. He also explains how because Brahman’s relation to the world is indeterminate, it follows that the relation to human experience would also be indeterminate, which means that the mystic defense of this causal objection would fail. What he seems to be getting at here is that certain characteristics ofBrahman must be identifiable through experiences if they are to have dignity, thus they would be available to human comprehension.

Sometimes this relation is spoken about as material causality. Here it might be helpful to think of the example of a candle which can be melted down and re-shaped into anything, without the substance itself ever changing. So this can be an analogy for our awareness that is changed from one that is discursive to one which is immediately self-aware. Phillips also has a problem with the idea that Brahman is the material cause of everything and that we can experience this through Brahman-knowledge. Because self-awareness means one is only aware of the self - nothing else. What he seems to be saying is that if you take the example of meditation, you try to clear the mind of everything but the self. However Advaitasays that the self is Brahman and Brahman is everything - so really we’re not being aware of just the self, we are being aware of everything. Thus he thinks that there is quite a lot of metaphysical work that needs to be done before we can take seriously the mystic empiricism of Advaita, and that the consequences are that Sankara may need scripture in order to be able to defend the ontological and cosmological parts of Brahman against this causal objection. He concludes by saying that Sankara doesn’t have the grounds to be a fully mystical empiricist because his foundation is in sruti (that which is heard), not scripture (Phillips, 2001:506).

Chapter 5

- Rejection of the causal objection.

It seems Phillips may have misunderstood a few concepts in the process of coming to his concluding assertions. Firstly, we could look to the author of the masterpiece that is the Brahma-sutras, Badarayana. Of this scholar nothing other than his main work is known, and his dates are widely disputed - ranging from 2nd Century BCE to 200 CE. His ideas regarding Brahman’s relation to the world could help alleviate some of the tension between the issues presented by Phillips, who is suggesting that Brahman as the efficient cause of Brahman-knowledge can’t logically work because cause and effect are different from each other. However, Badarayana does not express these notions in this way. By making a standard philosophical distinction between material cause and efficient cause, Badarayana states that Brahman is not only the efficient cause of the universe but the material cause as well. If we think about how candles, on one level, are essentially just wax, but on another level, separate ones are obviously different in different physical ways - they could be different colours, shapes, and sizes. In this way, it seems Phillips’ assertion seems to falter. Here we can also refer to the Chandogya Upanishad 6.1 (Mascaro, 1965), where the wax candle analogy becomes one of a clay pot. The Chandogya Upanishad explains that this is the result of the knowledge of which the unhearable is heard, the unperceivable perceived and the unknowable known. Badarayana, like Sankara, has the authority of sruti for the assertion that Brahman relates to the universe in a way that is like clay to things made of clay. He rejects the notion that this is incompatible with other ideas regarding the universe being absorbed into Brahman and thus be rended as imperfect because of samsara, and explains that this is not the way to think of it (Plant, Collinson & Wilkinson, 2002:91). For if an object made of wax becomes melted, it is wax that remains, so too does the universe into Brahman - it will loose all its particular qualities and attributes and all that will be is Brahman. It could also be suggested that because in the West our ideas have been shaped in part by the Christian Orthodox beliefs regarding creation ex nihilo, which occur nowhere at all in Hindu thought.

A second misunderstanding seems apparent in his questions regarding mystical experience of Brahman as having its content as omniscience. He finds it hard to imagine how a human being can experience omniscience due to our existence being finite. Well, Hinduism holds the belief that our existence isn’t finite at all - this is the illusion which is imposed upon our being because we have been embodied and forgotten the true essence of our nature, Atman. And since Atman is just another manifestation of Brahman, we could say that in fact we are no different from Brahman and thus our attributes are also no different, meaning our existence is not finite at all, rather it is the opposite - infinite. This also dismantles his argument that Brahman’s relation to the world is indeterminable, since the relation is that He is us. This also answers Phillips’ query about Brahman being unavailable to human comprehension - Brahman is human comprehension.

- Concluding Thoughts.

So, it seems that the notion of ‘knowing Brahman’ as presented by not only the Upanishads, but also the Bhagavad-Gita and the Brahma-sutras, can be reduced down to the basic concept of experience. Since it’s through our experience we know about the world, it would make sense that it is also how we can know about God. Sankara’s Vedanta system places the path of knowledge on the highest tier; it is through his philosophy of oneness that the Hindu learns about the mystical elements of their religion. Of the multiple holy books within Hinduism, it seems that Upanishads, are the main source for a message that is conveyed throughout all - that to know Brahman is to be Brahman.

Learning Journal

At the beginning of the process of creating this study, my ideas were a lot broader in the sense that I was interested in Hindu philosophy – I knew that I wanted to learn more about it - but I was struggling to find a specific way of going about it. At first I was going to look at the relationship between Eastern and Western philosophy, however due to the tremendous scope of research and literature on this topic I felt my ideas needed to be refined and more specialised. I found Mascaro’s translation of the Upanishads and decided to focus mainly on the ideas presented within them. With this refined idea, I began my reading to find that the idea of Brahman as being essentially the same as all life really appealed to me for some reason – I found myself agreeing with, and understanding the ideas presented in the text. Throughout the research period, my reading of the Upanishads have made quite an impact on not just my worldview, but also as to how I treat other people, animals, plants and the environment in general. I have never really felt like my life required a space for faith or belief, however now it seems like there is a part of me which is conscious off this kind of universality between all beings and it has brought me a lot of happiness over the last few months. A few personal changes in my writing style also seem to happen whilst writing the study, which I think is down to the sheer amount of reading I have been doing, in that I seem to have found my own style of writing where my voice and opinions can be heard in a n intellectual and professional way, however I still think that there is room for improvement in some areas of my writing. Overall reading and learning about the Upanishads has been one of the most rewarding experiences, and one that I think I will take with me in the future to ensure a happy existence not only for myself but those around me too.

[areyoueallyreadingthisright-blog]

**Dear Gun Violence**

(A satirical pen-pal letter to Gun Violence)

Dear Gun Violence,

How the hell are you, you son of a bitch?

I thought we talked about this already, you can’t just keep showing up and ruining the mood all the time. You're being a total square GV. We strictly wanted either one of the two situations to unfold; something involving an organized crime shoot-out or some act of terrorism involving the use of the 2nd Amendment to justify racially charged acts of “Pre-emptive protection,” since it seems like that’s the stuff that you and your pals are so infatuated with nowadays.

Anyway, I just wanted to send this letter to check-up on you; I hope things have been going well since, like the beginning of time since guns were invented. No foul intention mind you; Life is a beast and you just have to handle the beast sometimes, we get it.

But the truth behind this is that there's a collection of scenes, a collection of emotions and ideals that are coupled with unbridled anger either in the form of fear “inferiority” or malicious intent like “perceived superiority.” But where does this anger stem? And is it even anger in some cases? I think that’s the biggest question that we’ve been tackling lately with relation to firearms in general.

In my opinion we treat firearms the same way that we treat monster trucks. At face value they both are impressive pieces of machinery in their own right. Both very capable of harboring destruction when used in tandem with initiative. So why am I trying to make this an analogy you might ask? Think about it, monster trucks themselves are pretty cool; and yeah, maybe their purpose for carnal entertainment is sometimes a bit overrated. But what is fascinating about those kinds of places? And one of the reasons why live music is so encapsulating to so many people. Ontological Design; a device used to recreate mystical and almost magical moments. A place or places “where things happen” that transcend all things and creates its own matter and gravitational force to supplement its existence. Like live music and monster trucks and firearms, they all evoke a rare facet of sometimes perturbing but also very real ideas that we inherit or subconsciously recognize simply based on the association that we have with that particular object. Many times it's by way of feelings that we have carried and stuck with throughout our lives. Memories or some asphyxiation of the real world that grants the phantom memories of those histories.

Or I suppose in other cases, we are persuaded with a very well presented "story" of how , for some apparently *God-granted* reason we are supposed to follow in the footsteps of someone we've never met, and in order to be successful in the after-life, we need to carry-out these acts of "religious freedom" against people who are  identified as a “perceived threat” (see retribution) based on pure speculation. Speculation that stems from uncertainty, irrational fear, or even some hocus-pocus tradition that has insinuated some level of aggression or distaste to an individual group of people for no reason other than to maintain conventionalism.

So all these things considered, many of the conflicts that arise from these "ontological awakenings" typically tend to evoke combat or confrontation, often in the form of a battle with words, maybe sometimes staged as acts of pride under the guise of fear. Mind you, this is still very much a perception of my own understanding of how the presence of firearms has influenced and molded our history and society.

And yet one of the things that I've thought about lately in relation to firearms is this "evoking initiative" sensation that people experience when they are situated in these positions of "perceived-power." What is it about being at a live performance or attending a monster truck show that makes them so captivating. For example, most people would be fairly neutral about monster trucks in general, simply because their level of engagement with monster trucks is fairly low on the scale of "things I interact with on a daily basis." But let's say you get VIP Tickets to the monster show and are offered the chance to ride in a monster truck with a professional. What say your response? (Most would answer Yes! Because when's the next time this will be an opportunity?) So what happens after the professional sit-in with a monster truck driver? You might feel totally different; whether the outcome was positive or negative, since you are eventually exposed to that mentality of "carnage and destruction," a very basic yet powerful level of subconscious influence, especially if you're not aware of it to begin with. You get that dosage of "fulfillment" or "rush." Like the phenomenon "runner's high," which is a big release of endorphins (chemicals in your body similar to morphine) that give runners a very euphoric "feel-good" feeling after long runs.

That's how I feel we think about firearms in the United States. With that same reverence, that same deep respect. But where does the line begin to blur? At what point do we undermine the importance of emphasizing civility at the cost of perpetuating our conventionalism? If conventionalism is similar to tradition then why are some of us so unwilling to pass our traditions aside for the sake of saving innocent lives?

I guess it really just boils down to how much individuals respect others and what the cost of a life is to them. Maybe many of those individuals who prefer to live in exclusivity value the life of another individual less, since they would typically have less human interaction (not always the case, but a heavy generalization) compared to someone who lived in a populated urban area. If that's the case - do these individuals get to offer the same level of opinion as others do? Despite them being a product of their own design.

And that's really when we step into various theories of gun control and the presence of firearms in society today. We are too inundated with pursuing so many agendas related to firearms that we sort of just let the river run under the bridge; totally disregarding that the river is running red with blood. So where does this "evoking initiative" narrative come into play? When people are often found in "the zone," what's the last thing that they're thinking about? Literally anything else beside whatever it is that they're occupied with. So if we take any of the most recent events related to school shootings within the past 20 years, there's somehow this very common thread of why these individuals felt compelled to proceed how they did. (Lack of social connection, victim of bullying, mental health issues gone unaddressed, etc).  Pair that with the mysticism and sheer level of “perceived-power” of a firearm, and you can imagine why so many of these tragic incidents are occurring where they are.

                We look at how the structure of the American Education system has evolved throughout the past couple decades, and we find an environment that has dramatically shifted from embracing an ideal of community in schools and instead has been substituted (almost like a vacuum) with social media. The tolerance of instant gratification has raised alarmingly fast. My age-bracket being at the very cusp of that start. Yet this idealization of instant gratification has left teachers with pop quizzes and paper text-books to compete with their attention? It’s no wonder the United States suffered a deficit of public educators, school teachers, or mentors. So how does the attention of social media influence the proverbial “playground” in the public education system in today’s world?

At times (especially in schools) I think that social media becomes this poisonous medium of public humiliation, self-inflicted isolation, and a reinforcement of fabricated realities where we are defeated and choose to fill in the gaps of others’ lives so that we want to make what seems like a great story/life just perfect.

And of course another result of immersion into instant gratification is this idea of PCT (problem centric thinking). This framework of thinking that is devoid of highlighting the successes or goals in your day-to-day, but instead grinds you for the mistakes or failures that you’ve run into. It’s a combination of pessimism and cynicism rolled up and presented in a way that made me think, “This is normally how people feel everyday.” I couldn’t have been further from the truth. The whole “no pain, no gain” mantra sort of resonates when I find myself falling into the problem centric thinking. This idea that suffering needs to take place before growth can ensue. Sufferance is a very powerful emotion, but I don’t think its part of the recipe for growth.

On top of everything else, its this thought of how unlikely it seems to use weapons against others with whom you share no past. While there is definitely a correlation based on the level of isolation someone may be feeling or who they attribute as a catalyst in their life up until this point; but why is there such a commitment with firearms that we see a split between victims that either had significant relations with or absolutely no relation with? At this point the genesis of motivation is less of a cause and more of a symptom. We are so quick to place accusations based on very generalized or reinforced ideas of why the perpetrator did what they did. And yet we see that these individuals are willing to carry-out violence or aggression in environments they have little to no past or association with.

But who I am to say any of this isn’t difficult for you, Gun Violence? The invention of the firearm was inevitable. But I think the excuse for “ensuring protection” and “keeping the peace” or better yet, offering our “thoughts and prayers” as solace has turned this whole get-up into some “down-range” demonstration of potentially religious, racist, and emotional acts of violence at the cost of I honestly don’t know how many lives have been lost. The thought that even in as much of this text that I’ve written, the names of the victims alone would vastly outweigh my character limit for, I don’t know, the next couple pages most likely is haunting.

And it sickens me to know this is something I have to live with every day.

But really Gun Violence (GV), I understand you have to get out those really juvenile urges, so it’s important that you express yourself in ways that make you, you. I know you’re not a very popular pick amongst the majority, so maybe its best if you pursue a career that fits you more appropriately. Like for example, I would probably suggest attending and/or ruining events for Water Guns fights. Or if you’re feeling more PG-13, maybe even show up to Nerf Gun fights at 12-year olds parties if you really want to act like the sick fuck you are. All-in-all, we love to see you go [forever] and get really disappointed and annoyed when I have to see you on TV again. Like almost as disappointed and annoyed at the frequency of how many times I feel like Amber Alerts need to be matched to the same intensity for a Tweet onslaught by our POTUS. Like, I need to know that I should be preparing myself for what’s to come, you know? I can’t casually receive Critical Updates about our Government through a social media platform only designed for 140 characters (honestly feel like the only reason they upped the limit is because of Donald Trump).

But, go take care of yourself GV, okay? You could always try going after laser tag, ya know? You tried that back in 80s, 1979 to be exact. Didn’t really work out for you, huh? Couldn’t really make a career out of it, shame.  Are you still disappointed that laser tag isn’t a full contact sport? Or is it that Star Wars made super unrealistic expectations about lasers and blasters?

You know, you know what, you don’t need to be doing this GV. We had some good times. Some really really great times. And they were usually always when you weren’t around. And by “we” I mean literally everyone else. I know you have your enemies out there; like gun control or fingerprint-enabled security. I get it, you're just not the one we’re looking for when we’re trying to make change. We have a system in place for that, sort of.

What I don’t understand is that we are constantly being told by a system that we believe is “protecting us” (or at least it should be). So why are you pushing so hard to get people to remember who you are, Gun Violence? The real question is when we are we going to be focusing on the other factor playing into this mess? Stop trying to make Gun Violence a thing, it’s never going to be a thing. Considering your age I can understand why you’re so reluctant to go away. But stop making appearances at the drop of a hat; you’re not a reality that I want to engage with. There are guns, and then there’s violence. They can occur together but that does not justify your existence to continually propagate the idea that guns are inherently violent.  

Also, stop this nonsense like you are always innocent in the face of these tragedies. You berate these people who feel compelled to take action with firearms, and then try to completely disregard that you were an accomplice in the whole situation. It’s as if to spite them for being victims of a nihilistic world that you made. You keep trying to hide behind this idea that there are other people/things to blame for this uprising. And you’re right. It’s hard to overtake a castle with a super-fortress and an army of people. But if you take away the fortress, you only get the people. That’s the point I’m trying to get across; that’s what all these letters have been about. I know you enjoy being recognized because that’s the only thing that we can seem to keep trending in the United States in this era, but I refuse to remain silent while you continue to exist openly.

Your coming-to-be was both unwarranted and unwelcome simultaneously. Like making a gurnt (which I’ve been told is just a loud excessive queef made from a woman sitting on an exercise ball) while lying face-down on a massage table. That’s all I really wanted to say to you after all this time, GV. Sometimes you don’t want to deal with a woman farting profusely on an exercise ball; but someone is gonna have to face the music and tell her that vaginal flatulence on a public piece of equipment is gross and uncivil. Shit, even if it was her own exercise ball, that’s still gross.

If a restraining order could be filed against intangible concepts that are used to further push an unnecessary divide you know we fucking would,

The Internetional Fireworks Association (IFA)*

* = Actually the International Fireworks Association

[talabib]

How To Find A Greater Sense Of Meaning In Life, Even During The Toughest Of Times.

It’s inevitable that human beings will have painful and traumatic experiences as they go through life. When these difficult episodes arise, what is it that allows people to keep their heads up and continue?

The stitches that hold all of our experiences together are the communities we find solace in. The answer, if there is one, to the eternal question of life’s true meaning surely lies in togetherness and love.

It’s easy to find meaning in life when everything is going well, but it can be tricky when the going gets tough.

Isn’t it amazing when life just seems to work out? You and your family are healthy, you have a job you love and everything feels like it’s in the right place.

It’s common to feel that life is in order after experiencing good fortune, and this tendency has to do with the human ability to find sense, meaning or purpose in a string of positive events. Simply put, it’s easier to see meaning in life when things work out for us.

This tends to be the result of expecting things to turn out a particular way, while failing to see chaos as an inherent aspect of life’s overall meaning. Instead, we find meaning in the things we purposefully intend to do, like finding a job we love. If we achieve these things, that sense of meaning is naturally reinforced.

Because of this positive reinforcement, rather than seeing the mess and chaos of our lives as meaningful, we quarantine them, associating them with negativity. The same can be said for stigma and failure, which people tend to associate with painful, difficult or unplanned experiences.

So, given this tendency, it should come as no surprise that, when we experience suffering or difficult moments, we find it hard to feel positive about life or think of it as meaningful. Just consider catastrophic events like terrorist attacks, natural disasters or the loss of a loved one. In painful moments it’s hard to believe that life has any positive meaning at all.

In such instances, it doesn’t even matter if the event happens to us or to another person. The painful experiences of one person are still part of the human community and, in that sense, all people are affected by the negative things that happen to all others.

In other words, we’re all joined together by bad experiences. For instance, if someone murders another human, the rest of society is partially responsible, since they live in the same human community as that person.

But this realization doesn’t have to be a total downer – there’s actually a lot to gain from these negative experiences.

Life is a hodgepodge of good and bad experiences, and the latter have a lot to teach us.

Nobody only learns from quick, easy and painless events. But neither do they look forward to the dark times. In reality, life is a jumble of good and bad experiences, all of which have something to teach us.

In this way, life is a lot like an eclectic patchwork quilt, composed of innumerable different moments. It has holes that have been patched up, repeated sections and, for the most part, it’s improvised. The only thing we can do is take it one stitch at a time.

But people tend to hold onto the idea that everything in their lives should fit perfectly together in a neat, presentable package. They expect that they’ll finish high school, maybe go to university, find a career and build a family.

In other words, they’re stuck on a linear, step-by-step ladder. As a result, people don’t plan and aren’t encouraged to think about how, at some point, things will likely go off course. This is astonishing, since people around the world get laid off, lose loved ones or experience natural disasters every day.

Such negative events are simply a fact of life – but if we accept them as inevitable, we can actually learn a lot from them. These experiences shape us and are fundamental contributing elements to who we are.

So, in a way, we can never get over our greatest losses, as the pain they spur will forever shape us. But that’s not necessarily a negative thing.

For instance, instead of trying to “get over” losing his best friend, Tom held onto a shirt his best friend gave him shortly before she died. Wearing the shirt kept him connected to his best friend, while acknowledging the pain she felt from losing her. By honoring rather than suppressing the experience, Tom was able to see beyond the pain of losing someone dear to him.

We’ve seen how we can’t trust or cling to our expectations of having linear, straightforward lives. But where do we get these expectations from in the first place?

Societal pressures often discourage sensitivity, causing people to downplay difficult and painful experiences.

From early on in our lives, the pressure is on for things to go right. Whether it’s our parents, teachers or even our bosses, we’re pushed to follow certain paths.

But the truth is, things never work out as planned. So, why do we cling to this illusion of an unobstructed, painless ride? This is because we’re inundated with external pressures that tend to discourage sensitivity. As a result, we’re generally not taught how to engage with the fact that life can be difficult.

Just take a term like “overly sensitive child.” It implies that, even as children, people are criticized for engaging with the pain of existence – and that a tendency to do so is seen as disruptive or unhelpful.

Especially as people grow up and make their way through the education system, a tremendous amount of pressure is placed on achievement, which harms sensitivity of every kind. At the same time, the stereotypically American obsession with money and status inhibits our awareness of this fact and interrupts our ability to see what truly matters.

It’s this same attitude that has created an American culture that frowns upon asking for help. As a result, the process of working through difficult experiences become stigmatized and people are further isolated.

So, what are the effects of this emotional dulling? Well, if sensitivity is discouraged, people ultimately end up denying or minimizing the painful experiences in their lives. This is a huge problem because, as we now know, everyone experiences suffering at some point and, by denying it, we’re simply suppressing the emotions such events produce.

Just take children who grow up with alcoholic parents. Their parents tend to insist that they have vivid imaginations and that the horrible things they describe haven’t actually occurred. By denying the truth in this way, the problems are left unresolved, ultimately compromising the children’s emotional well-being.

Being together with others is a profound experience that gives us a sense of meaning.

Do you have one really amazing friend who you can tell anything? Or do you have a person in your life who you couldn’t imagine living without? Well, if you don’t, you might want to start building such a relationship. These types of close connections are powerful and, in general, something profound happens when people come together.

For instance, when we’re on our own, a single, simple task can feel like an immense responsibility. But when that same task is done with others, the load is not only shared, we’re also capable of doing much more.

Just consider a person who is going through a painful experience. Simply by sitting with them, passing the time together and being present, another person can ease their pain. This gesture takes very little from us, but it fundamentally alters the other person’s experience of suffering.

Or take the community that can be built in the aftermath of a natural disaster. When people embrace such cataclysmic events together, the sense of community and compassion that forms during these hardest of times can bring people closer together.

We also find meaning in communities, as our links to those around us help support us. Just imagine being a part of a community that’s working toward a shared goal. Wouldn’t it feel better than sitting alone at home, working on the same project by yourself?

And finally, when people feel that they’re part of a community, they become more likely to open up about their pain and suffering. As a result, they build more open and honest relationships that only add to the feeling of togetherness and, therefore, meaning.

For example, the community built around women’s movements has inspired countless women to speak up and free themselves of everything they had been taught by a sexist, misogynistic society. Because of this togetherness, the movement grew ever larger, as people were drawn in by an increasing sense of community.

There’s not a person alive who hasn’t questioned what life means or what their purpose is on the planet. When our lives are off-balance, it’s difficult to see any meaning at all in this crazy world. But by coming together and being there for each other, we can give life meaning while supporting one another.

[davidcdelreal]

7 Ideas for How to Invest $5,000

When I first started to invest, I could only afford a measly $50 per month.

Granted, I was in college still and living on Ramen noodles but with a part-time job at the mall and an internship at our local investment firm, I finally started to understand the importance of investing.

Over time that $50 a month turned into $100 a month, then $250 a month and kept growing from there. It almost seemed surreal when it got to a point where I could invest $5000 at once into one investment.

It was an awesome feeling but also scary knowing how long it took me to save up that $5000.

Hopefully you have found yourself in the same situation, trying to figure out what to do with $5,000 sitting in your bank account. There are several different avenues you can take, and it's important that you understand all of your options.

Before you run off and invest your newfound money in an alpaca farm, let's look at some of the different choices, so you can make sure you're making the best decision for your money.

Invest in Others – Lending Club

What I like about Lending Club is that it reminds me of when I first started investing into mutual funds. You didn't have to put a lot of money down and you're able to diversify your investments.

With Lending Club since you are investing into micro-loans not one borrower is going to get 100% of your investment.

So if you had $5000 to invest, you can take solace in knowing that that money is spread out just like if it was in a mutual fund

Another appealing feature of Lending Club, for those that don't want anything to do with the stock market, is that it operates completely independently of the stock market. When you turn on the news and see the Dow Jones is either 400 points or down 500 points it doesn't matter when you are utilizing a peer to peer lender like Lending Club. You sit back and collect the interest and take it as cash or you can reinvest it to new notes and make even more interest.

Depending on which type of account you open you may have some fees with Lending Club. If you open a retirement account (IRA, Roth IRA, etc.) you will have some annual fees until your account reaches a balance of $10,000. In my Lending Club review you can learn more about the fees and how I have been using the service.

Let Robots Invest for You – Betterment

With any sort of stock investing I will always recommend making those investment inside of a Roth IRA. Since most people can grow their cash tax free while investing up to $5,500 per year in a Roth IRA, make sure to check into a Roth account for the next three options for investing your $5k

If you are not a hands-on investor that wants to play a role in deciding which investments are best for you. If you fall into this category, then Betterment is going to be the best route for you. Betterment is one of the best ways to investment your $5,000 and then forget about it.

Betterment makes investing your money as easy as a few clicks of your mouse. After you create a Betterment account (which will less than a hour), you can deposit your initial investments, set your financial goals, and your risk tolerance. After you've made those decisions, Betterment will handle everything else for you.

The website uses “robo-advisors” to invest your money without you having to spend hours researching different companies or options. Instead, you take a short questionnaire to determine what you feel is an acceptable level of risk in the market and the algorithm takes that risk tolerance and makes investments for you.

Betterment even rebalances your portfolio as needed. If your tolerance for risk ever changes, you can log in and make changes and the service changes your portfolio accordingly.

Diversify by Investing in Mutual Funds or ETFs

When I first started investing I made sure to diversify by using mutual funds. Mutual funds are a company that handles all of the investing for you. They compile all of the money from the participating investors and then distribute that money based on the focus of the mutual fund. Some mutual funds invest the money into specific types of funds, like technology.

If you’re looking to put your money into a mutual fund, Tradeking is a great place to do that. You can easily open a Roth IRA account and put your $5,000 to work in your fund choice. You will want to do some research on the funds and how they have performed over the last one, three, and ten years. Many funds have decades of history, where you can see how they have done over your entire lifetime.

One downside to mutual funds is that they usually have a fairly large minimum to get started investing. You may only be able to invest in one or two with your 5,000 dollar investment.

These large initial deposits, that are required for most mutual funds, have acted as a deterrent for many people wanting to diversify their portfolio, and that is why ETF's have become a very popular alternative.

Exchange Traded Funds (ETF's) work like a mutual fund in that you are investing in a large number of stocks all at the same time.

The difference is that ETFs are traded on the stock market just like a single stock would be. This means you can buy much smaller pieces of these funds instead of having a large initial investment.

Currently the top brokerage for ETF investing is TD Ameritrade. While you can invest in ETFS with any of the top online brokerage accounts, TD Ameritrade allows you to invest in over 100 different ETFs for no trading fee. $5 a trade can add up, and that money is definitely better working for you.

Invest in the Stock Market

When you think of investing, you probably think of the stock market. Putting your money in stocks can give you the best reward, but it also comes with some risk. The idea of trading stocks can be downright terrifying for new investors, and even for some older investors. There are a few tools that you can use to simplify the process and make the most of your $5,000 investment.

One of the best ways that you can start your stock trading journey is by opening an account with TradeKing. They have one of the best all-around services for trading stocks. They continue to offer excellent customer service and low fees ($4.95 per trade). Not only that, but they will also offer several quality tools to help you make smart decisions with your money.

If you want to invest in the stock market, but don’t want to be troubled with hand picking each investment, look no further than Motif. Motif is a website that will allow you to buy a bundle of 30 stocks (known as a motif), and these stocks all revolve around one central theme, like medical technology.

There are two big advantages to Motif over picking individual stocks. The first is that each motif will only cost you a $9.95 fee to make the investment.

Second, you can purchase fractional shares of stocks. Some well performing stocks will cost you $100 a share or more. This would only allow you to buy 50 shares or less with traditional stock purchases. With fractional shares, you can break your investment up more broadly, buying only part of a single share if you want.

Invest in Yourself – Pay Down your Debt

There's not a better feeling than getting rid of all your debt. After graduating college, I had credit card and student loan debt and I was constantly feeling the weight of having those payments every month.

Thankfully, by finding a girlfriend, who is now my wife, that also hated debt we were able to formulate a game plan to get all of my debt paid off. When I wrote that last payment to get rid of my student loans, it was one of the most freeing feelings I've ever experienced. When you have $5,000 the temptation is to invest because it's feels like a good decision to be making money, but I promise you having that stress from debt lingering will never go away.

Once you go debt free you never go back but you have to get there first.

Every investor is different, but in many cases, paying off debts can help you save thousands of dollars in the future (which you can use to invest much more). I know, paying off your debt isn't the sexiest way to invest your $5,000, but it could be one of the best options. Let's look at an example to see just how effective paying off your debt can be.

Let's say that you have credit card debt that equals right at $5,000 and an interest rate on those cards of 15%. That translates to $70 every month in interest payments. The idea of investing into paying off debt is like plugging the whole at the bottom of your bucket, before you start pouring water into it. Get that negative interest out of your life so the positive interest can be more effective at working for you.

Invest in your Kids – College Savings Accounts

Now that I have four children the thought of how much college is going to cost me and my family is very scary. Heck, it was scary after having one kid but now that I have four it's hard to ascertain how much its really going to cost.

There are very few things that I want more than to make sure my kids do not exit college with the same student loan problem that I had, but I make sure to balance that desire with making sure my retirement is secure first.

All too often people don't realize or consider that you can't borrow money in retirement like your kids can borrow to pay for school.

Yes, they'll be straddled with student loan debt but they'll be able to have job. If you are retired and you have no income, there's no where you can go to borrow to pay your bills and live your golden years the way that you want.

The most common way to prepare for the cost of college is to open a 529 college savings plan. These plans are also known as Qualified Tuition Programs, and they allow you to invest the money in the plan after taxes. You can withdraw that money and any investment growth tax-free, as long as you use it pay for cost associated with a college education.

Each state has its own 529 plan and every one of them has different limits and requirements for their specific plan. Many states will allow you to deduct your contributions from your state taxes, so make sure to check and see how the rules for your state plan work.

If your state does not have any incentive for investing in their 529, then I would look at opening an account with Wealthfront. Not only do they have a full 529 through the state of California, but, like Betterment, they will do all the management of the account for you.

Your kid's college fund isn't going to have an immediate return on your investment, but if you want to give your children the money to further their education, opening up one of these accounts is the best way to do that.

If your child ends up being brilliant or talented and getting their tuition paid for through scholarships, you can decide to withdraw that money and pay income taxes ONLY on the interest that was earned or you can leave the money in the account and transfer the funds to a family member in the future. This means you could have money sitting there for a grandchild or even for you if you want to pursue higher education.

Investing in Real Estate

Investing in real estate has taken on a glamorous appeal as more and more shows come out with people buying cheap, fixing up and selling real estate investments. As someone who failed at real estate, but managed to get out mostly unscathed, I can tell you the traditional investment is not for everyone.

That does not mean you cannot get in on the investment in real estate, because there are several real estate investing options for your $5,000.

The first and most traditional technique is to be a landlord. You buy the property and then find a renter. This could either be commercial or residential. Being a landlord can be the most profitable, but it can also be the most cumbersome. In most cases, $5,000 won't allow you to get into commercial properties and will only be a down payment on a much larger loan for a rental property.

Luckily, Fundrise has made it extremely simple to add real estate to your investment portfolio. Fundrise allows you to buy notes in different real estate investments that go through scrutiny by various real estate experts, and only 2% of the people that request loans through Fundrise get approved.

Not only does Fundrise make it easy to invest in real estate, but it's also a very profitable way to use your $5,000 that's just sitting around. Fundrise boasts an impressive average ROI of almost 7% in 2016. Unless you want to be a hands-on landlord, this is an excellent way to utilize that money that you have sitting around.

Investing $5,000

Regardless of if you're a new investor or a seasoned pro, it's vital that you make the best decision for your money. Thanks to the internet, there are a bunch of different ways that you can put your money to work. Your investment portfolio is going to secure your financial security.

Take your time, do your research and find the best place for your $5k investment. This is a great opportunity to have a lasting impact on your future or that of your family.

The post 7 Ideas for How to Invest $5,000 appeared first on Good Financial Cents.

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