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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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okay but to really expand upon my phel and romance/love/etc.

in all verses he is very so much so demi and as such requires a good bit of patience and effort to really consider even for a moment any kind of romance.

in his main verse he doesn't even consider romance as a possibility for him and any possible flicker he's swiftly extinguished before it could flourish into a bright flame. he's not incapable of love, but he presently doesn't view a future with him in it and even if he were to entertain the notion he thinks it'd do nothing but harm not only himself but whoever he'd become romantically involved with. he shelters it greatly but his heart has much to give. no one knows this fact better than his twin, but any chance of her poking toward it has been dismissed to change to another topic. at the present he avoids romantic love because he thinks to love for him would be a truly selfish sin that would leave nothing but sorrow in the end.

heartsteel is where he's far closer to maybe entertaining the idea of a momentary crush but never acting on it. he has not just his own career but that of his group's career to look out for as well. he cares far more about those around him getting harmed than maybe acting on anything. he's more open to the idea of helping his twin find love long before he could do so himself. even if he'd be extra protective of anyone getting any bit close to her at the risk of hurting her.

ultimately his heart is one that can love and sometimes yearns to be loved, but he'd much rather hurt himself than do something to hurt others. perhaps he could accept the idea but he truly needs the reassurance and comfort to be willing to try.

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( hc )#// bc i can actually never shut up abt aphelios have hc-esque ramblings esp as a glimpse of how i view my phel #// i miss rambling abt this precious blorbo so deeply #// like if you didn't know i think abt him 24/7 whehter i'm actively talking abt him or not #// but yeah #// the biggest hurdle i think for it all tho is him learning to love and accept himself #// okay now i disappear to maybe see if at some point i can slowly inch to drafts when pain doesn't make writing hard

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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mun v. muse !

yoinked & u shoudl yoink too

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( dash games )#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// did my best with the fact there's no markings for phel's face #// but glad could capture my blue-ish front parts w/ the blonde

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// so wheeze i applied for a zine project and i'm a bundle of anxiety #// bc like here's the thing i've passed up signing up for some in the past bc i didn't feel my art was good enough #// and was in my big depresso era #// still depresso era but happier abt my art #// part of me is proud of entering but i'm now nervous af #// i think the past few months have been a lot of stepping out of comfort zones for me and mild proud of it #// bc i get overwhelmed hella easily so baby steps #// but now i'm just sits on floor and stares at ceiling bc anxiety go brrr #// in a positive my bf was super sweet and sent me smth that made me happy cry love that nerd #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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sorry i poofed for a lil bit weather & health decided to whoop my butt the second i said i'd work on replying to things

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// the heat now presently is what's whooping my butt bc i'm not built for heat #// but it's bearable enough to somewhat function #// i will do my best to work on things again and get the ball rolling once more #// so sorry for the poofing #// but yee i'm slowly working back into things it's just taking a lil bit to focus on writing again #// hopefully i can have energy/focus for non-one-liner stuff #// bc i WANT to write but been a bit so pls be patient #// feel bad asking for more patience but i hope you all have been well #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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idek if anyone will know what i'm referring to but if you ever watched the anime kiznaiver in the final episode when katsuhira finally regains his ability to feel things--pain, excitement, everything--and he's asked if he feels alright and he cries happily saying everything he feels and how it feels good. so like . . . that kinda scenario but aphelios off noctum with also accepting he's not just a weapon and just emotions--

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// i had to share my thoughts bc like partially i wanna remind myself abt this maybe draw it or write smth on it #// but yeah in search of stuff to comfort myself i was reminded abt this and my brain went zoom to phel #// idk why my brain instantly started thinking of kiznaiver and that scene and then did that but yeah #// i kinda wanna rewatch that show now fuck #// ignore my mindless ramblings tho ngl could be nifty to write idk i'll see #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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okay but phel getting a hug

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// i am eternally on phel gaining comfort he never knew he needed until he gets it agenda lmfao #// i just . . . i care him so much

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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it's messy and not the best but i kinda doodled all the heartsteel boys with alune & ma

i tried my best. this was the first time drawing most of them save for two of them

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( mun's art )#// it's so hecking messy and stuff but it is just doodles so i guess messy is fine #// i really need to practice a lot more #// sett's ma & alune lowkey were my favourite to doodle

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armafidelium · 10 months ago

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#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// i do kinda live just kinda been struggling (tm) i'm trying to regian focus again sorry abt that #// life & trauma just been like hoo boy #// i miss writing tho just gotta get over also mild severe anxiety posting again #// wheeze #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// i still live but i've been dealing with a severe mental health crisis #// i'm slowly trying to get back to where i can do things i'm so sorry #// but thank you all for being patient with me #// i might hop on here and then to try responding to stuff but i have zero promises atm #// it's real bad #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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i can totally see hs!phel being the kind of person who can easily full combo rhythm game songs without batting a lash

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// my mind has been slight on rhythm games bc anticipation for new utapri game #// but yeah i can just see it clear as day #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐍

BASICS!

(PEN)NAME: ami / mika

PRONOUNS: she / they

ZODIAC SIGN: cancer.

TAKEN OR SINGLE: taken

THREE FACTS!

1 - i medically cannot work

2 - i studied graphic design and 2d character animation

3 - if i'm not sick to some degree it's a miracle

EXPERIENCE!

PLATFORMS USED: quizilla, youtube messages, msn, skype, deviantart, discord, tumblr, in-game ffxiv

PLOTTING / WINGING IT / MEMES: more often i wing it and let music and muse take me where it does. i'm good with plotting for a basic idea/guideline but iffy on fully plotted from-start-to-finish simply bc of a bad experience. also love memes have had some great interactions that started from memes.

MUSE PREFERENCE!

GENDER: i've had a wide array of male and female and enby muses. idk which outweighs the other. it all just stems from love so shrug emoji.

MULTI OR SINGLE: it varies? but generally when multiship it's exclusive per character. only had more than one for a specific muse in a specific fandom. ngl all in all it depends on muse/dynamics/etc. just a big shrug emoji. phel woudl probs be on the multi side with exclusivity bc comfort.

LEAST FAVOURITE FACECLAIM(S): uhhh????? lmfao idk

FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT!

FLUFF: i am a fluff gremlin who unintentionally picks muses who require a bit for fluff and i cry abt it all the time

ANGST: i call myself an angst gremlin for a reason. i used to be known for my angst in an old rpc and it was wonderful. tho i think my love for angst is very apparent w/ phel and if not just wait and see :^ )

SMUT: it depends???? i require comfort and familiarity to even consider writing it let alone i just feel a bit iffy about it in general. it can be fun when in a safe environment, but i've had awful experiences and that's why i require very specific environments. just all depends on comfort & muse tbh

tagged by: stole it.

tagging: you

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// lol the youtube one was legit back in the day when there used to be messaging there #// olden days

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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i'm a day late but happy pride all you wonderful sweethearts ♥ you're all so wonderful and valid and you make the world that much brighter !! you're seen, you're valid, you're loved ♥

#● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( ooc )#// phel being hardcore on the demi to almost ace && i'm ace & w/e you'd call my gender idefk man for simplicity enby #// i hope this month can be wonderful for you all #// i'll try my best to try slowly getting back to things but this month is hard for me #// bc suffered bad loss that still fudges me up #// but i hope you all have a lovely june you're sweethearts and deserve to know you're all wonderful #● ☾ ⭑ 𝗠ᵒᵒᶰˡᶤᵍʰᵗ ᵛᶤᵍᶤˡ ( tbd )

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armafidelium · 1 year ago

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