#뀨뀨 — queue

[gyujeongfmd]

starter for @fmdhayi / random studio 

maybe, he’s finally fallen into neuroticism today.

or yesterday, or maybe it was a week before when it started. 

the studio in his house no longer feels like home, creating deafening noises that relegate his work to gold star’s name. his studio in gold star feels even worse, compounded with interruptions of different staff members popping in to take apart his hard drive for extortion.

maybe, that’s just all an exaggeration.

either way, he’s found himself a new makeshift rental studio space. inside, it’s quaint and quiet, nothing more than some sofa he bought from ikea and the mini-fridge with whatever he’s managed to bring from his house. minimalism, the new concept, and by hour five, he’s created some songs he doesn’t deem shitty anymore — at least, not shitty enough to be a platinum title. (too bad, it’ll never get any use). by the time he plays it back, and reaches for another diet coke before realizing he’s out.

so, begins the trek out the door and straight to the CU around the corner. 

but he opens his door, stops at the soles of his feet when he runs into the last person he’d ever expect at a studio. “aren’t you supposed to be promoting for your solo? or are you here to stalk me for a second title follow up request?”

[404fmdhaon]

open starter for anyone / hallyu dream concert

if you asked him what he’d rather do, he’d list a million and one damn things he’d rather be doing than be situated at a hallyu dream concert, full-on costume with the makeup clouding his face.

it seems like the shitty loophole of festival after festival, concert after concert — promotions that don’t cease when he’s on a constant relay between knight and knight light. by the time he makes his big breakaway from his members and his manager’s hawk eyes, he’s left by a vending machine and the stack of food to serve his boredom well, hunger otherwise. “this is so shitty if they expect us to eat stale sandwiches.” gyujeong mumbles to himself, taking together a glance over to his right then to his left, catching the sight of another idol.

“nevermind, forget i said that.” his pass at glossing over his brunt words come at another grumble, underneath his breath as he turns a heel over towards the vending machine. one hand slipped into his pocket, damn — he should’ve known. nothing goes right, so he flees back to the idol. “i forgot my wallet — you don’t happen to have any spare cash on you or some shit?”

[gyujeongfmd]

aesthetic, playlist & headcanon

interior: a softer sentimentalist — his music gravitates towards a softer, paler version of him that’s often times nestled inside a harder exterior he fronts for strangers. close friends have experienced this side, knowing this is genuine. his music rarely gravitates towards ‘harder hitting’ songs that cater towards the public image. instead, it’s a more reserved, subdued shadow he sits in. playlist summary: he’s written, composed and arranged a lot of songs over the span of his career. first, it began with job duties, and submitting songs for other groups to consume. grass is greener on the other side, and contrary to his own belief, getting his solo debut didn’t make it any better. now, he’s just teetering between the lines of writing for other groups, but prioritizing his own music when inspiration dawns. over the course of his career, he’s found his own favorites that he finds himself listening to when most times, he wouldn’t be caught dead listening to his own music. this is his top ten favorites (in specific order). wc: 471

1. 우리서로사랑하지는말자 — 기리보이 / let’s not love each other — giriboy 2. soulmate — 지코 ft. 아이유 / zico ft. iu 3. 지켜줄게 — 기리보이 / take care of you — giriboy 4. 문득 — 비오 / suddenly — be’o 5. 사랑은 잘 — 오혁 & 아이유 / can’t love you anymore — oh hyuk & iu 6.  다시만난세계 — 소녀시대 / into the new world — snsd (lily) 7. 아름다워 — 창모 / beautiful — changmo 8. 포옹 — 세븐틴 / hug — seventeen (cloud) 9. U — 그레이 / gray 10. baby baby — 위너 / winner

generally speaking, gyujeong has this 반전매력 (reverse charm??) associated with him and his music. his image shows one thing, especially with the rumors. yet, when you take a close look at his music, it turns into this softspoken sadboy who just writes about getting his heart broken a million times over

it’s no surprise that this is true to who he is : ) 

(it also adds to why the gyujeong fans really think of him as ‘boyfriend material’ despite what rumors fly around because they want to believe he’s all soft on the inside. haters will say he has a ghost writer and gold star is just image making for the fact he had those rumors)

but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want to write something with a hard hitting beat or just something fun (ex: any song, maestro, ddu du ddu du), it just means he resonates with the more softer / emotional songs he writes

that said, he’s no ballader so you won’t see him belt. but you will see him sing / song or almost speak-rap in a full song — or if that’s not the case, he knows he can’t sing the full song? he’ll give it to another group to sing it on his behalf, because that way he can’t get sick of listening to himself trying to rap

he tends to listen to these songs of his because they are easy listening. sometimes, it hurts his brain when there’s too much noise and with these songs, he’s able to just sit back, relax and sulk a bit easier than with other music

the songs also hold a lot of sentimental value? each one in its own right, and each one has a poignant story. the weight of each song is what makes them in his top ten

the ironic part is the songs that he deems his favorite are often the ones neglected on the charts (aside from a few songs — but he blames the success of those songs due to the feature or the group singing it rather than his own ability) 

another ironic fact is that his songs that he enjoys are the ones that took the least amount of time to write — his last album took a few weeks to write, produce etc. and the others took a span of a few days because he was writing like he had a fever

there are blatant imperfections in the songs he released, but he thinks that makes the charm of unprocessed songs? makes it more visceral / palpable to how he was feeling at the time

fun fact: he doesn’t remember writing the rough draft two of the songs because he was pretty much blacked out, but after listening to it and fine tuning it, he gets a sense of what he was feeling that night 

[gyujeongfmd]

starter for @fmdhyojung / gs buildings

humidity’s a crime, and seoul’s guilty with it’s non-stop rainy season — least, that’s what he pins his frustration on. it’s certainly not the fact he’s forced to be in the building when he could be doing god knows what else, and it’s certainly not the fact he’s forced to make shit music under the guise of being a sell out. 

it’s the weather. it always is.

figures, that’s why he runs towards tardiness with his slow steps towards the company building, iced americano in hand all while balancing a chanel umbrella around his arm (pretentiousness comes in many pictures). gyujeong’s almost robotic in the stiff movements, scanning his id card, tipping his head towards the security before heading straight towards the elevators. but it’s the sight of someone he knows, someone he can fall into a conversation with — maybe then, he’ll be left with two hours of practice instead of three.

(he takes his shot).

“are you going outside without an umbrella today?” his eyebrow raises, peeks over towards hyojung barehanded. “you know, the weather’s kinda shitty today — heard it's not supposed to stop raining until tomorrow.”

[gyujeongfmd]

just gyujeong things — headcanon & aesthetic

summary — gyujeong does things that are sometimes considered unconventional by most. does he know why he does the things that he does? no. however, he tends to stick by what makes him comfortable, especially in his apartment. because most of the things are in his private life, fans aren’t privy to this aspect and still consider gyujeong a ‘cool boy’. in reality, he’s a dweeby loser with no life. wc — 474

a lot of gyujeong’s quirk and habits lie in his apartment, and i would consider them to be very tailored to his characteristic traits

it’s difficult to explain in terms of what those traits are, but through these explanations, there should be some better understanding of what makes gyujeong, gyujeong.

first off, jorts in winter. gyujeong tends to wear a lot of shorts in winter, and a lot of baggy pants / heavy clothing in the summer. why? i don’t know, he considers it annoying to put on layers when the weather is hot. however, his stylist makes sure he doesn’t leave the house for a schedule like this. instead, the jorts and shorts are reserved for when he makes a quick run to the nearest convenience store, or just goes to pick up coffee — he’ll be wearing slippers and shorts

speaking of convenience stores, gyujeong is the type to dress up to the max. it’s not jorts and slippers. instead, he pairs it with his most expensive watch, some chrome hearts jewelry and vivienne westwood jewelry to make a statement at the convenience store. for someone who wants to go unnoticed, he does like to dress up to the nines. most times, people just do a double take because they think he’s some weirdo. he likes to explain that he’s experimenting with fashion

gyujeong also likes to spend money on expensive / meaningless art pieces he thought were really cool when he went to an art museum in the states. for example, he buys james terrell which is basically just a light you fix onto the blank wall. he liked the concept at the time, and purchased a piece — luckily, there’s no tax on artwork like these so it’s a good investment that pays off in the end

soaps — gyujeong is very hygienic. he has a soap for everything imaginable, and likes to separate soaps based on body part. there’s new soaps for any new guests that washes their hand, and he makes sure to send the soap home with them. no cross-contamination in his house

going off of hygiene, he gifts anyone that walks into his house a new pair of prada house slippers. why prada? because it’s reasonable, goes with anything, and fits into any aesthetic of the person. plus, he considers the price reasonable compared to other luxury brands. the funny part is, you’d think this is an expensive thing to do, but gyujeong’s probably only had like 5 visitors max in his new house, so really, he doesn’t spend much money here

otaku here also has a studio ghibli-esque ridiculous cat treehouse for his cat, tokki, who hates him. he purchased because of the “aesthetic”, not because he loves the cat. after all, it’s a nice statement piece for anyone who walks by :)

overall he’s a loser end of story xo

[gyujeongfmd]

famed base award survey

— participation in the “eyes” of gyujeong

idol you would like to work with: the lead vocal and main dancer of equinox idol you would like to treat to a meal: any of the catalyst idols idol you would like to befriend: n/a idol or group you are most looking forward to in 2023:  most charming idol: are there charming idols? favorite dancer: the main dancer of equinox favorite singer: lately, lily’s main vocal favorite rapper: currently a fan of drake, don’t @ me favorite idol song to sing at noraebang: dumb dumb by equinox most beautiful idol: cringe funniest idol: kim heechul

[gyujeongfmd]

crowned final interview

1. talk about your reaction to your final ranking.

“we placed fifth. right down the middle, which i guess makes sense considering we placed top three, then bottom three. now, we’re in the middle — does it matter when the show’s over?”

2. why do you think you received the final rank you did?

“people probably liked the stage since we’re not normally a formal performance group. at least, that’s my assumption other than the fact that our fans probably ramped things up after seeing the results of the previous episode.”

3. which final performance, other than your own, was your personal favorite?

“i liked equinox’s dazzle dazzle. thought it was fun, true to their color — the stage was pretty lit up in terms of theatrics when they’re not really known for being a performance group compared to a group like andromeda. thought it was something different, and made me pay attention for more than thirty seconds.”

4. if it’s different than your favorite performance, what was your favorite final song? why?

"my favorite song is different from the performance — i thought so bad was a catchy song. didn’t think much of it first until i found myself humming the melody later on in the day. now, if you ask me about the performance? i won’t remember much. it’s the song that slaps.”

5. other than yourself, which group would have received your vote for the win if you’d been able to vote this round?

“i’d vote for equinox. just sheer loyalties because my unit partner’s in that group — figures, they deserve placing out of the middle.”

6. if you could do the whole show over again, what would you do differently?

��probably nothing. tell me to do a show like this, and i wouldn’t do anything different or handle myself differently.”

7. what was the most memorable moment of the show for you?

“the unit stage was fun, probably the most fun i had on the show. i got to work with a friend, and present a style of dance i haven’t tried before. plus, the sheer fact that i was focused on a dance team would be memorable in itself.”

8. is there anything you want to say to any of the other competitors? any congratulations or any heartfelt words for any friends you made?

“congratulations to my unit partner kiana and her group for winning the entire thing — well deserved. to my members, thanks for sticking it out — we’ve done the most we could in this short time. and to the rest, good job.”

[gyujeongfmd]

crowned unit interview

1. how do you feel about how you and your group performed?

“i think there are always going to be a few regrets. things i didn’t do well on, and things i could’ve done better. i just really wanted to execute a perfect performance and rank high on the units, but i feel like i’m lacking in a lot of ways. i don’t feel like i showed my potential on stage, and i really feel like i let my partner down. i can only hope that the fans realize how much work and effort when into this, and how despite any little mishaps on stage, there’s still a strong performance we were able to show.”

2. which unit’s performance (other than your own group) was the strongest?

“i’m sorry, but you’re asking me to choose another unit’s performance over mine? i don’t think so. despite any issues i had on my own dancing, i really think we won this one.”

3. which unit’s performance was the weakest?

“probably the lizzo cover? you pick a song by lizzo, and the vocals don’t match up to the original. i don’t care what you add in post-production, the foundations aren’t there. the other units at least had a strong vocal foundation, and mostly composed of main vocals. you put two leads, and what do you expect? they get outshined by the other groups regardless.”

[gyujeongfmd]

heartbreak hotel — headcanon, aesthetic & playlist

summary — a final end to a chapter that’s spanned a whole decade, and it leaves him completely empty (not to be overdramatic). but enough that all he does is hug his pillow, cry and mope around to an end he saw coming playlist summary —  they say that with heartbreak, people are more prone to feel the pain instead of letting it go. masochistic, or whatever you may call it — it’s the truth and cliche that gets people. in the end, gyujeong isn’t immune and what resorts is the forever ongoing collection of songs that he plays on repeat, any time he’s able to play music. the songs are sad, talk about how heartbreak causes ongoing loneliness. reminds him of the past, and then prompts him to cry till he lulls himself back to sleep. no signs of happy songs, especially when he’s rooted in promotions that has him putting up a front. wc — 483

1. 볼빨간사춘기 — 너는 내 세상이었어 / bol4 — space 2. 정인 — 미워요 / jungin — i hate you 3. 권진아 — 시계 바늘 / kwon jinah — 6:35AM 4. kina — wish i was better 5. 정키 — 홀로 (김나영) /  jungkey — alone ft. kim nayoung 6. 펀치 — 그때의 우리 /  punch — yesterday 7. 솔지 — 이렇게 헤어지고 있어 / solji — breaking up 8. 두리 (첸) — 사월이 지나면 우리 헤어져요 / duri (chen) — beautiful goodbye 9. 태용 (지디) —  무제 / taeyong (gdragon) — untitled 10. 수지 (태연) — fine / suji (taeyeon) — fine 11. 아이유 — 이런엔딩 / iu — ending scene 12. 선 (준수) — 꽃 / sun (junsu) — flower ft. tablo

this breakup was obviously one that he saw coming — it wasn’t ever intended that he’d stay with yeseul and have everything be happily ever after, with a few ups and downs

instead, it was meant to be more of a way to show that first loves usually don’t work, despite how much you want it to and how much you try to make it work

to put it short, they became different people. yeseul started seeing her family again, and slowly getting back into her family’s graces after leaving and having a tumultuous past all these years. meanwhile, gyujeong became a pigeonholed work freak aka an idol who really didn’t have it all together, overworked and completely bored with life because work sucked the life out of him

as much as yeseul tried to be there, surprising him, being there at the apartment — it wasn’t enough, considering they couldn’t be attached at the hip as they were as kids. plus, when they were kids they had less responsibilities considering their parents were supporting them and now as adults, they were figuring out life and how they intertwined their lives after growing apart for so long

the time, yeseul waited patiently. but gyujeong couldn’t deliver the soft spoken words or the time she wanted. instead, it ended in a lot of sorry’s and we’ll talk about it later considering gyujeong pushes away tough subjects 99% of the time. thus, the relationship didn’t feel like a priority in yeseul’s eyes, despite gyujeong making it the top priority.

he expected things to be perfectly fine back to how they were as kids. but how many people truly stay the same person they were at 14? that puppy love blinded him for a decade, and he thought what he was chasing for all this time would fall right into his lap, unscathed. but adult love is different than puppy love — more commitment, more seriousness. it can’t always be fun and games

the relationship went downfall after the initial joys of being adults inside this relationships. the freedom to date was limited, they couldn’t be normal in public. so many limitations and not enough work leads to the end

they both saw it coming, and it was a mutual heartbreak? they could’ve pressed it on further, and tried to make it work despite arguing. but they both knew what wasn’t being spoken: it wasn’t the same. it changed. they weren’t helping each other as people

they were on different paths, and the fights weren’t explosive as they would be as kids. instead, it would be a passive aggressive fight? soft, and not really loud — the lack of passion inside it led them to realize it was a dying flame

however, it still kills gyujeong because he feels like what’s the point of trying in life when what you chase becomes nothing more than second up to the memory.

[gyujeongfmd]

headcanon & aesthetic — wardrobe pt. 1

summary — this is gonna be a series, but i’m starting with shoes. gyujeong’s been in the fashion venture for a while, and has shown various different styles throughout his career. he’s been pegged as having an eccentric and unique type of fashion that doesn’t blend in the crowd, and one part of that is because he has a collection of shoes that seems like he never wears the same shoes twice unless it’s his tabi’s, slippers or converse. (probably did this on gyujeong’s previous blog but this is all refreshed and made new) warnings — none wc — 631

just like with any outfit, gyujeong considers the accessories, more specifically the shoes to be just as important as the outfit itself. he’s had this fascination with shoes since he was younger when he used to collect jordans / wear air force 1’s as a kid. however, his mom never allowed him to spend so much on shoes, so gyujeong was always limited

it’s probably why he gravitates towards shoes first when he starts making his money himself. they’re not expensive in theory, considering a cardigan at a luxury retail can cost anywhere from $2000-8000 dollars whereas a pair of shoes rarely exceeds $2000. so, to him buying a pair of shoes right then and there doesn’t seem like he’s splurging

as a result, when any new shoes come out — any rare collaborations or one time released colorways, he’s always the first to buy it. he will use the app to try to wait in line, and if he doesn’t he’ll buy it resale value (he’s paid $2000 for his pair of travis scott nike dunks)

but with the rarity shoes, he rarely wears them just because they seem like more decoration pieces for his apartment than actual pieces to wear out — ie) the nike air max 97 sean wotherspoon collab was fun to wear once, but afterwards he just didn’t see to wear them and it was just nice to say he owned a pair than style it out

with things like his dior x jordan collab — he wears that easily out, just because it’s easy to slip onto his feet and a timeless piece. it’s not loud, and thus it just blends in with the rest of his outfits

one thing fans always point out is gyujeong’s love of tabi shoes. margiela when they first released the tabi’s, that’s when gyujeong was sporting the pig feet looking boots — however, as they’ve expanded it and made it a ‘staple’ style, he also bought a pair of sneakers which caused awful blisters but he wore them anyways bc he thinks they’re cute and stylish

so, that’s the gist with his ‘comfy’ shoes — they’re either just jordans he slaps on, regular sneakers like the saint laurent logo sneakers, tabi sneakers or even just chuck 70’s. most times than not, these are the ones he wears for dance practice vids or dance practice

the other comfortable shoe he picks is usually his slides? he’ll alternate, but recently he’s just been into the yeezy slides because they’re so comfortable (from personal experience 10/10 recommend). he has five pairs as his house slippers, and for guests if he ever has them. then, he has two pairs he’ll go to wear out to the convenience store or just hang out at gold star

the last section would be his dressy shoes, which consist of mainly loafers. he loves his chanel x pharell loafers, and most times than not he’ll sport these for ‘airport pics’. plus, they fit with his brand deal, so that’s another plus

he also luvs his martine rose shoes — a lot. they make his feet look like clown feet, but honestly, he loves that look because he purposely buys a size bigger than his shoe size since he likes how his feet look in terms of outfit coordination when his feet stick out

refuses to wear gucci loafers once the general public started eating it up — no way in hell he wears those loafers or mules because they’re too generic for his liking. if u wear those, u are a square to him

all in all, his shoe taste is pretty similar to his clothing taste. it’s unique and the public either thinks gyujeong has the same 4 pairs of shoes or has so many he never wears them twice.

[gyujeongfmd]

five questions — gyujeong

warnings — none

Create a timeline of at least five important events in your muse’s life and include an explanation of the importance of each.

1994 — birth — born into a chaebol family with a diamond spoon in his mouth, he’s not only the first born, but also the first male. already written with high responsibilities, his birth gets hidden under the radar as his family doesn’t want high publicity surrounding his upbringing as he grows older. just born, he doesn’t know the series of events that ensue from being in a family with power. 2007 — 사춘기 — discovery of an underground rap scene in seoul during the summers he was allowed to come home. he learns his first love of music, and learns what it means to pursue something that wasn’t already pre-planned for you. it’s the beginnings of independence that he falls in love with, along with a crowd of people that feels more like family at age 13 than his parents did for his entire life. also, the year he meets yeseul, the one person that changes him forever. 2009 — change — kicked out of his parents life for being too rebellious. refusing to fall in line with what they have planned, paired with his father’s anger issues and a serious emphasis on what titles mean. he turns to leaving his house, falling off the family registry, all kept hush hush to the public. no where to go, nowhere to hide — he gets scouted, enters gold star’s training program. 2010 — break up — busy schedules along with increasing pressures to debut to support himself after the big fiasco of his youth. he’s still a child, yet holds the thought he has to support himself. in result, he leaves his first love and turns to idolhood. 2011 — debut — wins in survival show mean something different, a path that leads him into spotlight. he becomes a new face in a new group, learns what it means to hold more responsibility in being the sole provider for himself. 2014 — first scandal — smoking / drinking underage pictures come out from a crummy old acquaintance from his past. in comes public hate wave 1. 2017 — second scandal — speculated relationship despite still yearning for his old love. bullshit, but comes public hate wave 2. 2019 — third scandal — caught arguing in a pub, attitude scandal. hate wave three. later hashed out when public realizes the other party involved was an underground rapper with a bad reputation. present — confused — reunions don’t feel as good as they felt imagined. he’s balancing a career that gives him too much attention, ruining his life behind doors. 

What is your muse’s fatal flaw / biggest flaw?

i don’t know if gyu has one fatal flaw, but rather a few minor ones? one is that he’s too empty headed, meaning he doesn’t know how to or want to ever communicate. he wants to brush off subjects, and talk later — never getting to them later. this causes a lot of turmoil in his interpersonal relationships as well as the way he comes off when he talks to strangers. another fatal flaw is that gyujeong holds onto too many things, refusing to let go. it shows in his relationship where he wouldn’t let go of a break up for ten years, only to be reunited and break up once more. he holds onto the past, and goes into this hyper-romanticism of it, which often leads to high expectations that leave him devastated when it ends.

What is one of your muse’s core values? Name a situation where they might consider sacrificing/changing this core value.

gyujeong is someone with extreme core values, hence why he doesn’t associate with a lot of people. he takes honesty as something serious — meaning, if your friends with someone, you should never talk badly about them behind their back. he considers anyone to even say something remotely bad about a friend to be two-faced. similarly, he also has strict moral policies on his own relationships, meaning there are lines that shouldn’t be crossed. he doesn’t know how to sleep with people without having any feelings, and doesn’t believe that people should go into relationships without being full heartedly in love. in terms of music, he wants people to focus more on the integrity than the actual act of doing well to appease their company, and to stop focusing so much on past successes to influence the next. aka, he has so many morals i can’t comment on them all but it’s really hard to say if he’d ever bend his thoughts for another situation considering he hasn’t been in that situation yet. perhaps, if he really felt a connection with someone that showed him a different avenue of what he thinks currently, he could bend. but for the most part, he’s a completely black and white, polarized thought process. 

What does your character want more than anything else in the world? Is this a conscious desire or a subconscious one?

i don’t think gyujeong at the moment wants anything in life besides freedom. freedom that means that he’s not forced to promote in platinum tracks or partake in their comebacks if he doesn’t want to — freedom to decide when he wants to release music, or if he wants to take part in something. aka, the freedom you get from being in your own company. it’s a conscious desire considering he’s felt like a puppet his entire career, one that has caused him to sell-out so many times — to the point where he questions once or twice whether it was better off to join gold star or just have stuck it out with his parents, considering they’re the same path. he doesn’t know if loneliness and feeling stuck gets better on one side or the other.

As a mun, if you could give your muse one piece of advice, what would it be?

i want gyujeong to be happy. i don’t know why, but he’s a muse i consider really sad and misunderstood — more so than he gives off. he rarely has any time to be happy, and by that, i mean he has fewer chances to find true happiness because he’s either overworked or being angry at the world. i want him to let loose, and have fun — stop being stuck in a mindset where he has to achieve something he’s longed for in the past. instead of searching back, i want him to see forward in the future and learn what it means to live life where he’s not thinking of things that happened ten years ago. either that, or i’d ask gyu to learn how to communicate himself better instead of being bad with words. speak what’s on his mind, and take time to think of how he feels in each moment rather than brush it off because he’s ‘busy’.

[gyujeongfmd]

schedule self para — solo stage

summary — while gyujeong preps for tour to sing a ‘solo’ song, some iffy choices lead to one song he stands firmly on. (spoiler: he chooses to cover equinox’s bad boy) warnings — none wc — 477

he’s been in this situation, more or less, a million and one times before. 

an over-exaggeration? yeah, probably. but that doesn’t take away from the fact he’s been lapping the same practice room over and over with a mic in his hand, going through the motions of one song to the next till it all bleeds out the same. it’s just noise at this point — periods of time where he’d been downright dull mood of the same cacophony ringing through the speaker with the same ments written in the lyrics.

but he doesn’t feel anything for the songs, least not in this moment. it doesn’t help when he’s rehearsed half of his discography, snippets of the chorus here and there with the little blips of input from his manager lingering on his corner. 

because in the end, it doesn’t matter.

it doesn’t matter becomes the status quo excuse for each reasoning he uses to brush off the workload. one comment, or one suggestion — it doesn’t matter when it all flies over the head of executives, and he’s nearly a headless chicken barking empty talks on the table. so, when he’s ready to go down the line and spin a random shuffle for the song he’s expected to perform, he resorts to the bare minimum (read his body language: lying down on the floor, staring at a blank ceiling as some rough demo of some track from four years ago plays in the background).

“i don’t want to rap — i always rap. if i have to rap to meteor or downtown baby one more time, i’ll lip sync to a song with no pre-recorded vocals.” it’s his resolution, huffing out a breath of frustration when his fingers stretch to hit pause on the screen.

“you’re being dramatic, gyujeong. you don’t have to rap, you could sing your other songs.”

“my other songs are also outdated and boring— i don’t want to sing a song that’s been over played. it makes my ears bleed.”

“you’re still being dramatic.” his manager pays no attention to him, pressing his seconds on his own phone. 

at the end, he being indecisive, and forming his own allergic reactions to the world around him. there’s no such thing as a perfect stage, and the crowd that fills the arena don’t give a shit leaving a barren sea of people who just nod their heads without engulfing themselves in the process of song. despite how many times he’s laid it out, it’s just a realization he’ll have to accept: songs don’t matter when they sell.

(because he’s a sell out).

gyujeong props himself back up, pressing his palms against the floor. balancing his forearms on his knees, he stares straight into the mirrors — some shitty reflection of himself. he pauses, tilting his head. “you know what, i’m just gonna sing bad boy instead.”

[gyujeongfmd]

P L O T C A L L 

following the trend, and using this as a new year / new me — jk, not really i’m still the same. but consider this a post to get new connections / build on old ones, see any possible overlap with schedules and what not. i’ll be on dscrd or ims (probably on minjung, but you can still reach me on gyu) :~) anyways, spiel over, under the cut are my babies’ current doings.

if you wanted to keep any of the event threads, let me know and i’ll continue to respond! :~) 

G Y U J E O N G

emotionally, he’s still stunted. probably borderline on the edge of getting back with his first love despite not knowing what he’s falling into — either way, he’ll be caught up with that mentally to the point where he won’t have time for other conversations / be short-fused for a bit (idk maybe your muse intervenes and it just gets plain-out messy, angsty chaotic roll of confusion)

as a result, old friends he might have more arguments as he’ll be more pensive / uptight in the current situation while new friendships may have to be paused because he’ll be hard to get a hold of (on a day where you might get a hold of him, drag him out because 99% of the time he’s been cooped up in his room)

in addition, his personal life has been aired out by today’s seoul — so bring it up and you get an even bigger bitch

career wise, he is still working on his otakgyu line. lmao, it’s been a while since he released the last batch, but gold star has him worked to the point where he hasn’t been able to release. so, he’s finally gonna release it this quarter, so hit him up and get that promo box of shoes

music wise — he’s working on his own solo project as gold star told him he had to get that shit done because fans have been asking for it after his last album. so, he’s working on drafting up a song to appease them. catch him in the studio this quarter

on top of that, he’s been tasked as gold star’s teddy to come up with things for ultraviolet’s comeback — ask him about it, or don’t either way he’s not very happy with either of those things since he feels he has so many other better things to do but has to do this shit instead

platinum, he’s created two of their title tracks which he’s not that happy about? but then again, when is he really happy about creating things for gold star’s capitalistic greed? nonetheless, he’s been working on those tracks so when they get released maybe your muse is a fan or not? idk let him hear it out or any overlap in promotions work! 

all in all, grumpy gyu back x100 — if you want something antagonistic or just neutral, you know he’s your guy

M I N J U N G

if gyu is emotionally stunted still, minjung is emotions on haywire. she’s reeling in what she feels for the people around her / the people of her past, and wrapped up in processing those viscerally one by one that you’ll probably get more bits of abstractism from her this quarter? more aloof, and more times she’ll be staring off doing nothing than being proactive and moving

friendships, she likes to keep the small fraction of people she’s close to. so, she’ll answer calls pick up, and invite for face to face interactions over any texts / phonecalls. hang out with her and she’ll probably just want to get drunk and talk about how the world likes to fuck her over time and time again despite her being the catalyst for her own demises

career wise, equinox isn’t doing anything too flashy. the next round of comebacks are also so… not her. she’s really regretting re-signing with gold star at this point since each comeback has just been plain out shit since she’s resigned.

however, work doesn’t have her that stretched thin group wise? so, catch her at gold star buildings — recording, dance practice, etc.

solo wise, she’s released some good bops (i’m biased) — so, gold star’s ready to bust her in the first quarter of 2022 with a comeback album. she’ll be writing songs during this time, and finding bits of inspiration in her time off. music talk of past releases / future releases or just getting her out of work, all of it fits her schedule

aka if you just want your muse’s head to be fucked with riddles, minjung can be your gal

others

anything base complex related or just related to the friendships within gold star / volunteering could also work since both of my muses are in gold star! or it doesn’t have to be schedule based, so if you want to do something outside that realm, i’m down too!

[gyujeongfmd]

self para — rumor reaction

summary — gyujeong’s worst nightmare comes to life as pieces of his fragmented past come to the public eye.  warnings — none wc — 502

“hey, did you hear?”

a long time ago, he would be a liar to say the words didn’t prod into his nerves, or make him second guess the list of his past encounters and past locations. but he’s more experienced now, more primed to face whatever shit life throws at him — any rumor or whisper, he learns how fast it quickly passes over regardless.

he hardly moves in his current state, walking around. he has his mental in check enough that he’s not jetsetting straight to the bar, nor does he want another break of nicotine to soothe. instead, he’s just floating in complacency, all while failing to disregard the stares he swears are directed towards him.

maybe, he’s just looking into it too much.

but the jostle in his pocket already has him pulling out his phone, feeling a gut punch right where it hurts when he reads the words from his friend.

야 이거 너냐? / is this you? 

linked: today seoul Celebrity H has gotten into some controversies over the years. He’s gotten a number of big opportunities of late in spite of this. In truth, H secretly comes from a chaebol family with plenty of money and influence behind their name. Could it be possible H’s family’s influence has allowed him to continue his career unscathed without his company and the public sending him on his way back home despite his downfalls?

and the spotlight drops to him, when he feels a blankness come over his body. the emptiness of teetering here and there, the questions that amount to a cesspool of answers he’ll probably never get. so, he moves instead. quickening his pace when he leaves the half-empty room into the corner, his fingers already moving like bullets into the link.

no comments, no questions. just the thoughts of the masses and the evident accumulation of signs that all point to him — like a target, he’s been marked. his heart pounds, and it feels like a subsequent fever dream. eyes that can’t scratch the surface of who’s around — he’s just scrambling at this point.

it’s not very long till the anxious rhythm that drills into his nerves quell into a result of anger, irritation. resentment for the one who decided to divulge more than they could chew. a near decade of keeping his name undercover in the lapse of silence between him and the mirage of a family he’s lost, now it comes to light — now, in the disarray, he’s forced to pick his shit up altogether.

no culprit in thought, just a throbbing identity crisis of connecting the dots. and maybe, there’s a few rationalized choices he could make, one — ignore it till it blows over. but with the content in tow, he knows that’s not a viable choice. two — acknowledge the root. but ten years drives a bigger wedge than awkward conversations, and he’s not man enough to make that decision so soon. three — well, shit. there is no third.

maybe, he’s just fucked.

[404fmdhaon]

starter for @fmdhyeju / bc x-ray concert

bc can kiss his ass.

right then and there when the camera’s come like a collection of relays, one after another — catching every damn breath and his narrowed glances from the side-eyes he shoots straight towards them.

it’s an underlying decree: give me some fucking privacy. but when has bc ever cared about that when they’re too busy prancing around family imagery?

so, by the time he makes his break into the hallways, straight out the door, he’s caught again in another haphazard trap. lured in, no way out when he’s face to face with another reflection of a lens, smiling straight through with another familiar body next to him. “hello, my sibling hyeju.” gyujeong greets, voice so sarcastic it could split the frame right then and there. whether she catches it or not, it’s up to her — but he bets she picks up right on the spot.

“how happy and fortunate are we to be here at the same place behind the bc concert — isn’t it just so great we’re doing a family concert?” the sarcasm continues, and he averts his gaze to the cameras — heavy eyelids, an even heavier drawl of his voice. one smile that bleeds the ‘fuck you bc’ mantra from the start of its tone. 

[gyujeongfmd]

starter for anyone

chung gyujeong likes to think he’s covert.

at least enough that the dead-giveaway of his bright green chanel tweed and short shorts too high for the comfort of anyone else’s eyes doesn’t seem to phase him. (it’s the effect of the bucket hat, and the fact that everything seems to be blended in a haze of shadows — he’ll pin it as a mask).

by the time he’s sat faced in front of someone, he tosses the bag before any of the words get there first. “it’s a bunch of adidas shit — can’t believe gold star has me hounding about adidas when they’ve been in the know i’m true to nike.” that’s his greeting, a toss-up of a series of things he’ll never wear to the other person sitting across. it’s an age-old tale of drunken endeavors, when he’s equipped with the armor of half-a-beer, bordering tipsy, words slurring together and a face painted a damning shade of red. “this is shit i’ll never wear, so take it.” 

whether he’ll regret it in the morning, pasted over by news sources or whether this keeps under wraps — at this point, he gives no shits.