#💀⏰ dethqueue

[dethmail]

hey toki :D!

just wanted to send a couple pictures of my cat Percy, he’s a big fan of yours!

he says that he hopes you have a very merry christmas if you celebrate :D!

Hellos!

Oh wowee! Tell Percy I ams a fans of hims too! What a cutes cats! Loves his little face... Is that stuffed animals his friends? That ams so precious! Thanks you for sharings with me! Merry Christmas to you and Percy if you celebrates too! If nots happy holidays, hopes this holiday seasons has been brutals to yous (in the best ways possibles!)

Your friend,

Toki Wartooth

[dethmail]

Will there be a Dethklok pin up calendar? I'd pay my soul top dollar for a picture of everyone in their stage getup with the corpse paint!

Hey there... It's me... FACEBONES!!!

I've heard this idea circulating about Dethklok pin up calendars! It should be a thing, especially with all the thirsting we get from you all! Unfortunately Klokateer #1012 isn't good at art, but maybe you could convince some mtl artists to collaborate for the idea! Wouldn't that be fun???

[dethmail]

THIS IS FOR KNUBBLER PLEASE SHOW HIM THIS

Knubbler, I'm actually your biggest fan. Please let me get a hair tutorial plsplspls

Oh hey babe,

I never thought I'd be getting fanmail, but I'm so happy to get some! Usually I'm the one who ends up distributing the fanmail to bands and stuff so thanks for sending something in for me! I'm happy to know that I have fans, and you are officially the biggest one. Of course babe, I'll include a step-by-step tutorial for you. Hope this helps!

xoxo,

Dick

[Attached is a step-by-step tutorial as promised. He made sure to include pictures with every step.]

[dethmail]

Charles,

I’d personally love to hear about you more. You are such an interesting and mysterious guy, I don’t think you’re boring like a “robot”. Your smarts and critical thinking is to admirable!(like in a cute way :3)

-Marbles ⭐️

Hello Marbles,

What is it you'd like to know about me? It's true that I keep knowledge about myself to a minimum. It comes with the job I suppose. I've dedicated my entire purpose for Dethklok - I suppose you could say I live and breath Dethklok. Maybe at times it feels as though I'm much too serious and invested in my work. It's all with good reason. I'm glad you don't think I'm a 'robot', that's comforting at least. Thank you for taking the time to write to me I appreciate it.

-Charles Offdensen

[dethmail]

Murderface, why do I have this obsession with you biting me? Can you bite me, pretty please?

Ps, I love the gap in your teeth. And your lips 😏😏

Whatsch up with all the biting?? Are you schure you want me to bite you? I might have rabiesch... No... I don't but...

WAIT you achshually like the gap in my teeth? Alwaysch got made fun of for it... but if you like it then... Guessch it ain't so bad.

-Murderface

[dethmail]

just wanna jump on the Murderface love train! You're a smart, talented, heroic, funny guy (in addition to being very sexy!). I would love to visit a weird museum/or antique shop or cuddle up and watch a documentary with you. 🖤

Wow ANOTHER ONE?! I feel like i muscht be dreaming... Or maybe thisch is just the same perschon sending me mail under different namesch... That sounds like a great time though. I'd like that a lot... I want to go to this museum that has gross food. Documentaries can be fun to watch together too... I'd like that a lot...

-Murderface

[dethmail]

to murderface,

lovemail time hehe >_<

hi there!!! :3 if there's anything i do wanna say to u i wanna say that i think you're beautiful and handsome just the way you are!! and i'm always gonna love and support u!!! :D becuz ur my favorite guy!!!

i love ur smile especially!! its really cute to me!! <3

i have a question too!! do you like scary movies? do u have a favorite? :3 lemme know!!!

byebye!! <3

- 🦇❣️

Hey,

Wow... Still schurprised at the amount of attention I get here. I'm not really usched to it... but I'm happy for it. Thanksch for the love and support... I'm scho glad I've been getting bragging rights now that I've received a lot of fanmail. I apprechiate it.

You really love my schmile despite me having a gap in my teeth? Wow...

I do like scary movies... Hard to find ones that are actually scary though. Slaschers are my favorite. The Child's Play / Chucky movies is one of my favorites but really I like most slaschers.

-Murderface

[dethmail]

Dear Toki,

I wanna start by saying that you are a huge inspiration for me, and you're the reason I wanna start learning to play the electric guitar! Your style and your personality are so genuinely lovely!

I have 2 questions for you:

Do you remember having your wisdom teeth taken out (if you had them taken out)? I just had all four of mine taken out and it's been a hella rough few days to say the very least!

What's your favorite holiday? (doesn't have to be an American holiday!)

Thank you for being so so silly, and thank you for being such a great inspirational figure for me (don't tell Skwisgaar I said that though, he'd throw a tantrum!)

Sincerely,

🦷 anon

Hellos!

Thanks yous! Ams happy to hears that! Good lucks with the guitars! You cans do it!

Yes I remembers... I didnts gets thems outs until afters I joined Dethklok... I tolds my parents I was havings pains but they didn't thinks it was anythings to worry about... Sorrys you ams havings a rough times right nows. I hopes you feels better soons! Gettings them all outs at once is roughs but it ams better to do it all at once so it ams all dones now!

It ams Christmas! Thinks Christmastimes was always the best memories I hads with my families... so it ams always dears to me! Especially nows since I cans get gifts for all of my friends!

No worries, I won't tells Skwisgaar! Am happys you see me as an inspirations!

Your friend,

Toki Wartooth

[dethmail]

This is for Toki!

Hi Toki!!! Do you play Animal Crossing? Who is your favorite villager and why?

🐸

Hi!

Of course I ams play Animal Crossing! It ams one of my favorite games! It ams hard to pick a favorite villager... thinks I ams going to say my tops 3! My favorites ams Pietros, Kikis, and Fangs! Ams like Pietros cause he reminds me of my clowns friend dolls when I was a kids, Kikis cause she's a cutes cats, and Fangs cause he reminds me of Skwisgaar!

Your friend,

Toki Wartooth

[dethmail]

Dear Skwisgaar,

Do you like people braiding your hair? I think you’d look lovely with braids :)

Also, I sent something that I think you might like! I made it myself! It’s moomin versions of you and the band! (Plus Charles) if you don’t like them give them to Toki i won’t be offended

Anywho, I hope this reaches you! You’re honestly my fav in the band, but not just cause you’re attractive even though you really really are. You seem like a really sweet guy, who really cares about his friends! You’re very dedicated to what you love, especially guitar, and it’s really admirable! I know for certain that anyone would be lucky to know you, and even luckier to call you a friend. Just remember to be nicer to Toki sometimes! He’s trying his hardest ya know! Still, you’re an amazing guy.

Anywho, I have to go to work now, but I hope you have a lovely day and an even lovelier holiday season!

Sincerely,

The Moomin Anon (i like moomin :D)

Moonmins Anon,

Hellos... I don't really likes it whens people touch my hairs. It ams rare that I'll allows anyone else to touch it... but maybes I wouldn't minds my hairs being braided sometimes.

Oh wows... That ams very cutes. You mades these yourself? Ams going to gives them to Tokis. Not thats I don't likes it or appreciates it buts I knows Tokis will loves these... For mes I just don't knows where to place things like these. I keeps my rooms very minimals I don't likes a lots of stuffs in it... Tokis has a whole spots dedicated to these little plush things.

Ams glads to hear ams your favorites. Pff... No promises. Tokis can gets very annoyings... Don't knows. Maybe ams used to be more of a 'lone wolfs' types... I surrounds myself with peoples but I haves a hard times connectings with thems at times. I means... Yeahs. I will trys and be nicers to Tokis but no promises.

Thanks you, haves a lovely days and holidays seasons too.

-Skwisgaar Skwigelf

[dethmail]

Dear Charles,

That one time the guys basically wore bdsm gear you should have joined them, bonding activity and all, would have been a real crowd pleaser. And metal as hell

Hello,

Thank you for your inquiry. I have to politely disagree with you there as this was a band activity and as their manager I just stay on the sidelines. I understand how you could see it as being a 'bonding activity' but I'd rather not bring any more attention to myself than necessary. Besides I don't think it would be a good look for me. Thank you though for writing to me.

Sincerely,

Charles Offdensen

[dethmail]

hey nate we wanna see that gut too. you should collab on that pin-up calendar with will, just saying

Hey,

Uhhh... What? I don't know about doing a pin-up calendar. Sounds embarrassing... Besides, I don't think people would really want to see that. People always talk shit about me for needing to lose weight, I don't want to give them a reason to just roast me in the tabloids again.

Not that I care.

-Nathan Explosion

[dethmail]

Magnus,

Well shit, didn't think I'd get this far. I don't even know what kind of coffee you would like. I assume someone as brutal as you would take it black or something.

-A.I.S

A.I.S.,

Black with a tiny bit of sugar. I know everyone thinks I'm bitter, but I can be sweet sometimes. Only the lucky ones get to see that side of me.

-Magnus Hammersmith

[dethmail]

GIFT TOKI 500 CATS!!

WOWEE! THIS AMS THE BEST GIFTS EVERS! I loves thems all... Thanks you!

[dethmail]

Hey Facebones, thanks for passing on all our messages to the guys! This letter is for Magnus. Hello Magnus. This is again an anonym who loves to bite. I apologize for my previous incontinence, I was too fascinated by you. This time I just want to wish you a good day and tell you that despite everything, you are still an amazingly talented man with ambitions that deserve respect. Your appearance is captivating, your hands on the neck of the guitar look incredibly cool. Take care of yourself. Sending some of my love. - Vg

Vg,

Hey it's cool. Noticed a bunch of you like to bite... Guess it ain't all bad, I suppose I just have questions. Wait, not judging. I think I'd just prefer to do the biting. Maybe. You don't gotta apologize for saying how you feel. It's cool, I respect it. Seriously. Thanks for the kind words. I appreciate that a lot. For you being so cool, I've decided you can bite me if you choose to do so, but only if I can bite you back.

-Magnus Hammersmith

[dethmail]

Nathan,

Paper towel.

Orange juice.

Lemon.

this is your new shopping list.

their purposes will be revealed with time.

-Lemon.

Uh, what? Wait what the fuck? This seems so random... Kinda curious though so OK. I'll get these as long as you'll actually reveal to me what this is for.

-Nathan Explosion