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pathsofoak · 2 years

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this is way overboard, but would you mind answering all of the aro write question asks? sksjdjdjdjdjdhbddj🙈💚

YES. YES. HELL YEAH!

answering for the maze runner. I'm putting it under a cut because my mind can't accept that 'name' doesn't mean "write an essay"

I'm leaving some out that have terms in them that I've never heard before (I'm not really versed in the aro lingo of the internet), because there is a lot of questions. I answered most of them, but it genuinely is a long read XD. Little TW for a bit about aphobia around question 20.

Name one character you headcanon as arospec because of textual reasons

Thomas. I mean headcanon is a strong word (it's more of a this wouldn't NOT make sense situation), but he gets closest. Mostly because of the way his attraction to Teresa and Brenda is written. It's just always seemed so one-sided and a little forced to me. I don't have the excerpts handy but there are so many moments where any romantic actions shown are almost entirely initiated by the girls. Sometimes Thomas doesn't even seem to want it. Thomas I think is the only one to ever have a romantic subplot at all, and the way it sometimes feels forced by both the writer and the characters themselves just scream aro to me sometimes.

Ironically enough I've never really thought about it before because the romance in itself doesn't seem as thematically important as his other strong bonds in the series, so any headcanons relating to it just never happened. I've never been very set on any in particular anyway. I can vibe with whatever I read. Even in stories where romance itself is the story, like a lot of fanfic is, as long as the story is compelling I'm sold.

2. Name one character you headcanon as arospec just because you feel like they are

Thomas again, but to add a second name, Frypan maybe? I can honestly find a reason for anyone though. Most characters in TMR don't have a romantic angle to their characters anyway so my current philosophy is "aro until told otherwise or I happen to be reading something where they're not.

4. Name one character you headcanon as romance repulsed aromantic

Thomas, but specifically book!Thomas. He just seems so uncomfortable with it sometimes (I have never thought about it this deeply but it's sucked me in now). In the movies absolutely not, he kind of leans into it I think (though it's still usually Teresa being the active party, I've noticed). But in the books I do get this vibe.

5. Name one character you headcanon as aroace

Both, also Thomas maybe? Or it's just because I'm giving him a lot of thought now. I'm a sex-repulsed ace myself (I think, in my own definition of it), so to be honest it doesn't even really come up in my mind to think about it unless sex happens or is important to the story.

Both romantic and sexual attraction is kind of this thing of like "oh right most people have that" like I'll completely forget it's a thing sometimes. It really just never comes up to me as a specific thing to think about. For me it not being there is the default unless canon says otherwise. It's a lot easier for me to point out a specific character and go "that's NOT that."

6. Name one character you headcanon as aroallo

Referring back to that previous paragraph, because this one I do have one for.

Frypan. The aro part is more of a feeling, but if we're looking at canon in the movies there's that scene where Teresa is changing clothes and Newt has to direct his attention away. I suppose there's a line between finding someone physically attractive and being sexually attracted to them, but that was the first one to come to mind. Like, literally, I read through the questions and my mind was just like "Thomas. Thomas. Thomas. OH YEAH THAT'S FRYPAN."

8. Is there a character you think would be aromantic due to trauma, neurodivergence, or mental illness?

I think if someone were to not feel romantic attraction because of trauma, the trauma would have to have some romantic element to it. Otherwise it would just be a general fear of connection in general to me. So on the trauma one, no. Not really, the trauma (that one specifically, trauma they've got plenty of) isn't there.

I'm neurodivergent myself and I'm not really sure where I stand on aromantic and that seen as connected? I mean if someone is neurodivergent and aromantic and sees that as related that's their thing, but for me they feel like very separate experiences. Most ways to be neurodivergent (including my own) make connection difficult. Connection is a two-way street. Attraction isn't, per se.

But to actually answer the question, no, not really.

9. Is there a character you just cannot ever see as alloromantic?

Nope. If the story is convincing, I'll be convinced. To use Thomesa as an example again, it absolutely feels forced in the books, and in the movies the romantic angle feels a bit 'added on' to me too, but when I read fanfic with it, it really isn't that hard to see the connection. Thomas, Teresa, and Brenda in canon are a bit of a grey area I suppose, but in fanworks whether I buy it mostly depends on how much the writer buys it.

Though I only have that with romantic attraction. Sexual attraction is this weird foreign thing to me that I don't and don't really feel the need to understand.

10. Is there a character you just cannot ever see as aromantic?

Nope. Same story as last time, if the story is convincing, I'll be convinced. But in general I think it's impossible for me to not be able to see characters as not romantically attracted to anyone unless romance is thematically important or a crucial part of the story. With the Maze Runner, it's always felt to me like this web of connections and influences between all characters is much more important to both the story and I think the writer too, than "who does Thomas kiss." (Though there is an argument to be made about the forced-ness of Thomas's relationship with Teresa and how his relationship with Brenda in the books is Thomas's choice rather than WCKD's, in ways.)

11. Is there a popular ship you can’t stand because you headcanon one or more characters in it as aromantic?

No, not really. But I never 'can't stand' a ship for a reason like that. It's more the content of a specific story that I might not like (more 'steamy' content even if it isn't sexual, for example, is something I'd rather not read, and will skip over if it's there. Even if it's important). When I do 'can't stand' a ship it's usually because I find it morally objectionable, but in TMR's case I haven't seen ships like that. I honestly don't give it much thought, though.

12. Which relationship dynamics do you prefer to see? Romantic, platonic, sexual, familial, queerplatonic?

I suppose a mix between platonic and familial? AKA found family, to me. I don't really see relationship dynamics as something you can put in boxes so easily, though. I don't see any kind of positive familial relationship happening without having or growing a platonic basis.

I'm not at all interested in sexual relationships. I skip over it. Sometimes so effortlessly I forget it's a thing. Romantic relationships are different. It kind of depends on the story. If it's thematically important enough, and if it influences the plot enough, I don't really mind. But it's not like I seek it out.

I don't know enough about how a queerplatonic relationship works to answer, to be honest. (Hence why I'm skipping 13.)

But the general summary is that a relationship between two or more characters isn't a dealbreaker in a story for me as long as it doesn't eat away at the rest of the story. Like I said. If the story is convincing, I'm convinced. Unless it's sex.

15. Is there a character you think wouldn’t feel romantic attraction at all, but would still enjoy a romantic relationship?

You know what it is about the Maze Runner with me? All of them. I can see literally anyone like this, because it is generally my attitude when I read stories with a heavy romantic focus (though I'm not sure how I personally would feel about a relationship like that). I do not for one second understand what's going on, but that doesn't mean it can't be interesting. Like maths? Maybe? I like maths. I do not get what I'm doing but I've always liked more simpler maths. (now I have a whole analogy in mind for how I interact with the concept or romance lol. Remind me to mention that sometime.)

16. Do you ever read romantic fanfic while pretending the fic is about non-romantic relationships?

Nope. It also feels kinda rude to me. Someone poured a lot of time and effort into that, and then I'm out there pretending like they wrote something entirely different. Because I do believe romantic attraction is something definable and different from how I form relationships, I just. don't get how. There's some kinda reason in maths, but I have yet to find it.

It's also the phrasing of the question. About ... instead implies that the romance is a very important part of the original story. If the romance isn't convincing I might accidentally mistake it for something else (that has happened once. I was in the middle of an AO3 comment and then while looking for a quote realized I'd read over a throwaway line of one character fantasizing about uh.. rather intense kissing.)

But if you'd tell me to choose between two fics of comparable quality and plot, I'd pick the one less focused on romance. I can't say I don't understand disregarding romance as someone aro though. It's hard to find any media without a romantic angle in it, especially in fandom. If something 100% devoid of it is what you're looking for, either in original works or otherwise, it's either pretend otherwise or walk away empty-handed. (As I've done in many bookstores, because I'm still a little leaning toward YA in terms of tone and style but YA is so romance focused it's hard to find something that isn't.)

17. Are there romantic fanfic tropes whose appeal you will never understand?

Never understand, no. This is the autistic part of me talking, but there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for most of everything. I just can't relate. I can understand it appeals to someone, just not to me. The only reason it's not that simple when I look at my asexuality is because the 'repulsed' part comes into play and I'm simply less likely to admit it or have a normal conversation about it because I simply don't want to know which sexual tropes there even are.

18. Platonic soulmates: do you like the concept or not?

Ehh. I'm not really a fan of the concept in general. Romantically or platonically. I don't have a smart answer for this one, I just don't like it. If someone else does, that's great, but to me it just feels like a romantic concept with the word platonic attached to it.

19. What is your dream aromantic themed fanfic?

Short answer, none.

Long answer, I personally tend to avoid media heavily focused on it. That I'm aromantic isn't that important to me, it just is. I mean the entire identity is literally defined something not being there, that's all. The problem is, when you try to write a story that is aromantic themed, you know what you'll eventually have to touch upon? Romance. Because it's not there, and that's what sets aromantic people apart from alloromantic people.

My interest doesn't lie in aromanticism. If it happens to appear, great, and I'd love to see more representation, but really my ideal 'aromantic' story is one where romance just simply doesn't appear the same way I would love to see a non-binary character simply do appear without that being the focus. You know the way those lesbian cartoon shows so easily (in terms of the storytelling, I'm not in anyway downplaying any possible censoring involved) show two girls in a relationship, but at no point does it have to be so strictly defined.

It also has to do with my attitude towards labels. It highlights something other to me, that isn't there in my opinion. It just is. Period. The reason I call myself aromantic or non-binary isn't necessarily because those distinctions are important to me, they're not. They tell you precisely nothing about me. (See the connection to tell me about the plot?) I like stories where characters have someone to have their back despite all odds, I like stories about learning to love oneself, I like stories about vulnerability, I like gentle caring touches in my scenes, I also like absolutely brutal whump from time to time. I love writing complicated choices. I love the "I can't help you without inevitably harming you but I'm willing to risk losing you to see you live" trope.

At no point does the fact that I've never even considered romance come to mind, because I've never considered romance.

The concept or aromanticism is inherently tied to romance by its very definition. You can't write an 'aromantic story' without highlighting the contrast, without diving into aphobia, into allonormativity, because all these things influence 'the aromantic experience' so much more than the lack or romance every will. Because the lack of it means it doesn't come to mind.

I'm only aromantic because most people are not, so my difference has to be given a word.

Anyway my ideal maze runner fic at the very least includes and highlights the fact that all of them are kids, and the support and care they should have gotten. Also Thomas wrapped in a blanket. Actually anyone wrapped in a blanket and gently rocked in the arms of someone else. And parent-figures. They all deserve them.

20. Which fandom you’ve been in was the most aro-friendly?

That's a hard question to answer, because I don't exactly advertise it. Fandom is usually so romance-focused I don't really risk it, or I don't really make friends I'd tell it to, because I stick to lurking until a theory or headcanon comes up that isn't romantic. Plus, like I said, the distinction isn't that important to me personally.

I've actually avoided fandom for a very long time because of this. My first introduction into the ATLA fandom was at the height of the Zuko/Katara vs Aang/Katara discourse and I just kind of walked in there like that gif with a guy holding a pizza while an apartment burns to the ground.

I've had one experience in particular where someone asked my opinion specifically between several ships, and I learned the hard way that the only thing worse that saying you like the wrong ship in that situation was saying "It honestly doesn't really matter to me." Let's just say I've stuck to gifsets ever since.

A while back I made a (sincere) post regarding a popular piece of media on here, saying I would like it if no ship at all became canon because neither seemed to fit within the theme of the story to me. Not even from an aromantic standpoint, but as a writer. Neither made any damn sense.

I'm not going to get into detail but the response was a deciding factor in me abandoning that tumblr account (and not leaving any trace to my new one. Anywhere. I quite literally fled). I got called *counts fingers* a homophobe, misogynist, troll, several slurs that don't apply nor are worth repeating, and the list goes on.

I was so scared of the same thing happening when I got passionately interested in The Maze Runner, I exclusively stuck to writeblr and very strictly refused to follow any Maze Runner related blogs or even reblog the posts. I didn't want to risk ruining the fun for myself if I risked saying 'the wrong thing' again.

Really the only reason I got into fandom again is because of my fic. I wanted new and extra perspectives, so I got to chatting with the only TMR fan that had managed to stumble onto my blog at the time. The Discord was a calculated risk (and trust me I calculated it, there is a reason I'm not naming the fandom that drove me out of my last account. Best not to awake a sleeping beast). Not one I regret, I should say, because I've discovered this bit of fandom is a lot more mature than what I've gotten used to.

I could make a whole post on how aphobia affects the way I interact with fandom spaces and even my own writing. In the former it sometimes feels like walking on a minefield when I bring it up, in the latter case, I actually had a friend tell me I was queerbaiting when they read my outline. Why? One character helps another with a bath when sick, and these two characters also happen to have to share a bed later (eleven people in one camper, what did you expect?), and I didn't explicitly state that they wouldn't become canon. (That is something I now consider doing btw. Just to avoid disappointment and the uh... experience on my side that might come with it.) Suddenly there being no romance, because I didn't think it would fit, had become, and I quote "an aromantic statement." and my story was and about being aromantic. It's not. Up until recently I still had the idea to find a way to include it anyway because I mean I write for me but ideally people also want to read it. I didn't make the final call to not force myself until very recently, when people popped up that were interested regardless.

To summarize, I think my bar for aro-friendly is a little too low to give a proper answer. There is no most, because before TMR none of the spaces I found myself in were even prepared to talk about anything other than ships (that's actually part of the reason I usually don't watch things until they're complete, and then let some time pass. That way I avoid the worst discourse. In part because it's a bit triggering, but also because it's kind of annoying to be looking for a nice gif and all you see is people mad their blorbos didn't kiss in the end), and to be really honest I haven't been around people for long enough to judge. But I guess it wins the prize, because I don't feel unsafe in the circle I've found now.

Actually to add, I think the reason my fic has gotten so long and detailed and elaborate in its attention to certain characters is simply because I didn't have a space to discuss my thoughts and theories so I put it in there. All my analysis has been put in there, and it very much shaped the plot. (Which made it very easy to tell which characters were criminally underdeveloped or used in both the books and the movies by the way Frypan)

21. Is there something people in fandom do or say that makes you feel uncomfortable as an aromantic?

This isn't necessarily about fandom, just my experience with stories in general. Nothing I haven't mentioned above, I think. It does bother me when alloromantics take any story that doesn't include romance at all as a statement. I've also been accused of homophobia once because "all my characters are straight" they're not, no one is romantically attracted to anyone. Queer rep is a complicated topic for me in my original writing because romance is an afterthought to me. I don't like writing it, I don't really understand it, and it will never be a crucial part to any theme I write, because it is an afterthought.

I would love to see more stories where romance isn't there, where I'm not constantly confronted with the fact that I am different in a way that is rare/misunderstood enough to be given a separate name. My ideal story is told from a POV that is relatable to my own, and in that romance doesn't really make the cut. It's filtered out, goes unnoticed to the point that I honestly didn't really understand it was an actually different thing from friendship until a while back. It's just always going to be double and I guess sometimes I wish it would be a little easier for some people to see that to accurately portray an identity defined by the lack of something in another way than to constantly make a comparison, highlighting its 'otherness,' is to just have the lacking and nothing more. Of course that is just based on my personal experience, there are a lot of aros to whom romance does play a greater role in their life. It's not meant as a this is how it should be kind of statement, more as a I wish there was a bit of this like there is a bit of all the different ways there are bits of everything else.

22. Do you have an opinion on romantically shipping aromantic characters?

nah. If I don't like something I don't interact. No reason to be fully for or against it. It doesn't take away the representation in the source material. I guess it's not fun that it's so easily disregarded but if I get wound up about it I'm batting a hornet's nest on top of ruining my own mood. Maybe not the most correct answer, but it's how I go about things. I've never really understood those kind of rules to be honest. Someone who wants to ship them badly enough will just ship them.

Sucks for me but hey! aromantic characters in canon. This kind of reads like a very theoretical question because I've never seen it before in any other context than stories about queerness (and then the aro character is a side character that gets forgotten about by everyone but the aros and the maybe the aces because. No romantic focus. and romance is what defines a great deal of the queer community), OR it's about being aromantic specifically, which are typically stories where being aromantic is the source of the conflict, which I'm not interested in.

23. Free question: drop a random aromantic related fandom thought

uh... all of the above lol.

But also: if you don't have the romantic angle built in by default you learn to look for different themes in a story you can identify with much quicker I think. I think maybe that's why I'm not so vocal about by the word aromantic rep (not that it's not important to a lot of people), because like I've said before, me identifying as aromantic comes from not having an experience most people do. Now this is a dangerous thing to say if there's aphobes around because it might get taken out of context, but I find it easier to find myself in stories than I think it would have been if the focus of my queerness had been on the presence of romantic interest of any kind, because I don't have to look for that romantic interest to be present in the story. I can focus on my personality, on my interests, all that. The only way anyone could explicitly 'lock me out' of a story based on my sexuality is if every single character's every trait and quirk is inherently affected by their romantic interests. Which uh... would be... less than good writing in my opinion. A little flat.

It kinda works the same with my gender identity. I don't ascribe to any set experience in general, I use non-binary or genderfluid because those are the only labels that come close and I'm expected to define it some way besides "I just am. My gender doesn't really matter to be honest." Which are a lot of words to say the man/woman ratio in a story isn't important to me on an emotional level because gender also doesn't really come up as a defining factor of who I am.

This was a long bit lol but if you read it through to the end, thanks for making my dream moment of "hey would you answer every single question on this list of asks?" come true lol.

#D answers the asks #its-tea-time-darling #aromantic #long post

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