#( I’m probably gonna make it to Reuben before I pass out )

[sailor-aviator]

My dearest Liz,

You mentioned that you’d write a little something about the saloon event from Jakes POV if there was enough interest. I would like to formally declare my interest in seeing that, I’m sure other people would love it too! (No pressure whatsoever, I mean this more as encouragement rather than pressure and I hope it comes off that way!)💜💜💜💜💜

Consider my pressured and motivated! I'm kidding, ily

"Where's Mav?" asked Bradley, looking around the entrance of town hall with a frown.

"He's already gone down to the saloon, Roos," Penny told him with a bemused smile. "His meeting started half an hour ago."

"Christ, is that the time already?" Bradley asked to no one in particular as he squinted at the clock above the mantle. The Daggers had all filed in one after the other, and Penny had chuckled at the sight. How people found these idiots scary was beyond her.

"Bobby's down there ain't he?" Mickey asked her, and she gave a quick nod of her head.

"Should be. Told me yesterday he'd look after the place while I enjoyed my day off."

"He's probably bored to tears by now," Jake drawled with a smirk, leaning against the far wall. He pushed off and started making his way for the door. "Let's go see'em before we meet with Mav."

The Daggers waved their goodbyes to Penny, laughing and hollering as they made their way down the road and to the saloon.

"Mav's gonna kill me for bein' late," Rooster mumbled as the men made their way down the road.

"Wouldn't be the first time," Micky laughed, earning a look from the larger man. "Not the time?"

"What was your first clue?" Bradley grumbled as the group approached the saloon. A small crowd was gathered outside, whispering amongst themselves.

"A fight break out already?" Reuben wondered aloud. The sound of shouting came from inside.

"Is that Bob?" Mickey asked, brow furrowing at the sound of the other man shouting from inside.

"Bitch!" roared a man from inside. He sounded familiar, and Jake's brow furrowed as he tried to place the voice. A loud smack sounded from inside, and Jake heard a woman cry out. His blood began to boil as he pushed his way through the crowd. Damn cowards just standin' around as a woman gets roughed up by some low-life. Made him sick just thinking about it. He shouldered his way past the last man by the door, the other Daggers not far behind, and he felt his blood run cold.

A group of men crowded the bar, leering excitedly. Two of the men had Bob in their clutches, holding the young man back as he gnashed his teeth trying to break free. His blue eyes were darting around wildly, but focused down to the girl pressed against the bar with each pass. No, not just any girl.

Jake felt a rage unlike anything he had ever felt before sweep over him, and his vision turned red as he watched the man he now recognized as Isaac pin you against the wood of the bar. Isaac grabbed at his belt, and Jake heard you let out a sob.

"No!" you screamed, sounding almost animalistic in your terror. Jake was moving before he even realized it, the only sound in his ears was the thundering of his heartbeat as he drew closer to the scene. He didn't notice his hand flying to the gun at his side or how quickly he drew it. No, he was solely focused on where you lay, helpless against your attacker.

*Click*

Jake cocked the pistol, pressing it into the temple of the older man. Everything seemed to stand still in that moment. He heard the other Daggers reach for their own weapons, but he paid them no mind.

"Let. Her. Go," he seethed. Isaac glanced down at you, and Jake felt his grip on the gun grow impossibly tighter as he pressed harder into the other man's head. Much slower than Jake would have liked, Isaac pulled off of you, and you scrambled into a sitting position, small hiccups escaping your lips as you clutched at your torn blouse. Jake's nostrils flared at the sound, trigger finger itching.

Jake saw Bob rush to your side, hands gently checking you over as tears continued to spill down your eyes. That should be him, Jake thought briefly, bitterly as he saw the younger man try to comfort you. The sound of footsteps thundered down the steps, and Jake watched from his peripherals as Maverick, Benjamin, and Solomon Grindle descend the steps to the scene below. Benjamin's eyes immediately darted to you.

"Scout?" he cried out in shock. You let out a shaky breath, and he felt your eyes dart to him. Isaac stared impassively at him.

"Hangman," he sniffed. Jake hated this man.

"What are you doing here?" he snapped. Isaac was being far too cavalier for Jake's liking, and he had half a mind to put a bullet between the other man's eyes then and there.

"Well," the other man drawled. "I came to collect retribution for what you took from me, but then I saw you with this pretty, little thing the other day, and I figured this would make for a good trade.”

Jake thought back to the job he and the other Daggers had returned from a couple of months back. He had taken from Isaac, that was true. He had taken his woman at the time, among other things. Jake hadn't thought much of it at the time. Isaac was scum of the earth, so why should he? He cursed himself for thinking Isaac wouldn't seek out his revenge.

"I didn't take anything from you that you couldn't replace," he spat. It was true that Isaac didn't care about the woman that Jake had bedded, but the blond knew that wasn't what had him so hellbent on getting even.

"I disagree,” the other man hummed, picking a piece of lint off his shirt. “You wounded my pride, Hangman. And what better retribution than taking your woman?”

Jake's jaw clenched at the threat. Yes, you were his, and he'd be dead in the cold, dark earth before he let anything happen to you.

He saw Maverick move towards him out of the corner of his eye.

"Jake," the older man said softly. Jake barely looked at him, to intent on Isaac. Maverick continued. "Not here, son."

Jake heard the pleading tone in Maverick's voice, finally turning to look at him. He gave a pointed look in your direction, and Jake nearly cried as he finally laid his eyes on you.

Tears streamed down your eyes, mixing with blood from a cut on your cheek. Bruises were already forming on your skin from where Isaac had clawed at you. Your clothes were torn, and you looked so scared. Jake almost dropped to his knees in front of you then and there to beg for your forgiveness.

“The only reason you’re leaving here alive,” he rumbled, nodding his head over at you, “is because she’s here.”

Isaac held eye contact with him for a moment before turning towards the door with a light laugh. Isaac cast one last glance back at you, smirking, and it took all of Jake's willpower to not put a bullet in his head then and there. He gestured for his men to follow him.

“You best keep an eye on her, Hangman,” he called over his shoulder. “Would be a right shame if something were to happen to her while you weren’t lookin’.”

Jake vowed then and there that he would see Isaac rot in the ground if it was the last thing he ever did.

[mcsmmafia]

MC:SM Mafia - Round III 🍪

THE 3RD ROUND OF MAFIA

Story written by Mari

A group of nine village folk were out catching butterflies on a beautiful blue day.  One of them saw a pretty butterfly, catching the rest of the humble villager’s curious eyes. The folk left cookie crumbles to make sure they don’t get lost. The butterfly lead them to a big gingerbread mansion, with cookies, cake, and all sorts of sweets! The group looked at the sweets, absolutely famished. The group followed the butterfly into the dining room, finding a beautiful and grand chocolate table, cake scented glowstone, sugar pumpkins, and the most beautiful grand vanilla doors. The group, astonished by all this candy, broke apart the delicious candy covered furniture, as the butterfly floated away. As soon as the winged creature fluttered away, a voice was heard in the walls.

“Come one, come all, for this candy house is free for all, have a feast, what a treat, but in the shadows will emerge a beast.”

The voice was angelic, yet something wasn’t right about it. One of the 9 village folk rushed to the door, only to find the outside cracker paths covered in candy cane wielding zombies. “We’re trapped! What shall we do?”

“Well this is a house covered in delicous food!”

“But but good sir, listen listen! The voice in the walls said a monster will intrude!”

Humble villager folk, it is time.

To find.

THE EVIL WITCH OF THIS MANSION! 🎩

thunder roll

🌑 Results of Night 1:

Radar skulked off to the kitchen to sleep.

Stella first stayed in the entrance hall, but quickly came to the conclusion that zombie had a very loud voice, so she sneaked off to the attic to sleep.

Jesse also stayed in the entrance hall, staring at the zombies outside, waiting that they would slowly but surely eat their way into the house. However, they were dumb and didn't eat straight on one spot, so at dawn they still haven't made a breakthrough. Maybe it's safe in here.

Dan read some edible pages (the font was made of frosting) with his roommate in the library and enjoyed a sweet sleep afterwards.

Harper showed to be an altruistic redstoner who would disable all the traps in the kitchen.

Mevia did the same as Dan.

CASSIE ended up all alone with the candyfloss pillows in the bed chamber... well, dangit. There was nothing else to do than sleep on the gingerbread beds. On the bright side, it was still fresh, so that wasn't too bad.

Stampy spent a bit more time in the entrance hall, but then sneaked off to the attic to have a safe sleep.

☀ Results of Day 2:

Nobody had the guts to vote someone to at least get locked up. Death awaits them...

🌒 Results of Night 2:

Radar just... ate the wall in the attc. Partially. And then went to sleep. I- I don't even wanna ask.

Stella lingered around the living room for a bit, but then went to the attic for the night.

Jesse took the safety route and hid in the attic for their sleep.

Dan huddled up in the sweet sugary candyfloss of the bed chamber. And probably ended up being very sticky. No, I'm not talking about the bed... soon, a giant mass of sugar just fell on his head to bury him! It's a traaap!! Oh well, we'll keep him in sweet memory!

Harper stayed in the kitchen, ate a cupcake or two and went to the land of dreams afterwards.

Mevia was freaked out about Winslow, so she fled to the... dining room. I mean, why not lol. Surely something you wouldn't exspect!

CASSIE sneaked into the secret passage way and set off a trap or two in the bed chamber, and a random one in the gallery. Then she had her killer beauty rest.

Stampy just hang out in the kitchen, feeling sneaky eating a whole cake in just one second where PAMA was not looking, and eventually, je fell asleep. Or he went into coma because eating so much so fast... I'm not sure.

Dan has died!

☀ Results of Day 3:

Stampy made a trade with Stella and gave her an iron sword.

Stella was being quite the detective! Together with Jesse and Mevia, she was able to narrow down a few suspects. For tonight, CASSIE and Mevia were sent to the closet to be guarded by Jesse. And, I guess the rest just settled to ALL go to the KITCHEN!? 😂

🌓 Results of Night 3:

Radar had to move on to the kitchen because he'd otherwise eat a leak in the roof. And it's probably not so comfortable to sleep under the open sky with this storm going on.

Stella was eager to craft a copy of Stampy's iron sword in the kitchen. It took a while to gather all the materials, and she had to be careful to not disturb the others in their sleep. She eventually got finished a few hours before dawn, but just couldn't fall asleep because of the excitement!!

Jesse kept a very close eye to their prisoners, warily clutching their sword. They would not let them doze off for one second.

Harper stayed in the kitchen, not minding the company, and went to bed early.

Mevia also watched her guard Jesse narrowly, effectively spending the whole night on a staring contest.

CASSIE kinda just went with being locked up and forced to stay awake. At least she still had food.

Stampy was not okay with Harper being in the kitchen, so he fled to the attic.

☀ Results of Day 4:

Stella made a trade with Stampy and gave him an iron sword. Jesse gave the Flint & Steel to Radar. Mevia and CASSIE were sent to the closet to be guarded by Stampy.

Seems like they've agreed on two main suspects! Though CASSIE is in way stronger suspection by multiple people. Also... Could y'all stop assembling at one place!?! 😮😂

🌔 Results of Night 4:

Dan's ghost popped up from nowhere in the middle of the night and threatened Cassie a fiery doom, like a horror ride, in Night 5!! Cassie, seriously, you better watch out!! 😮👻🔥

Radar thought about writing a list again, but then realized it was kinda useless since literally everyone was in the attic anyway. So he only went to sleep.

Stella went to the attic to safely theorize about everything. She was still in thoughts as she slowly fell asleep.

Jesse allowed themself a restful night in the attic.

Harper was paranoid of everyone being in the attic with her, and chose to stay awake just in case.

Mevia was salty at her guard for having to stay awake again. No sugar could ease her mind.

CASSIE quielty accepted her fate of becoming a living zombie in the closet.

Stampy showed mercy to his prisoners and only forced them to stay awake... Although the thought of killing them both was sweet.

☀ Results of Day 5:

Mevia has been sent to the closet to be guarded by Stampy.

Discussions were going on... emotions have been raised... perks revealed... but most of the guests still won't commit to either Mevia or CASSIE. So Stella, Stampy and Mevia voted to throw CASSIE out, but they were short by one vote! Sooo annoying!!

🌕 Results of Night 5:

Radar fell safely into the sugary clouds and rested well in the bed chamber.

Stella followed her suspect CASSIE to the kitchen. Ominously, Lluna sniffed diamond nearby! Stella instantly had bets on a diamond axe, so she let Lluna steal it... then she chose to stay awake. However, the night would not go by that easily; it must've been around midnight when Stella abruptly felt a cold hand covering her mouth and throat! She tried to fight back, but the surprise and darkness weakened her mind, and soon, she passed out... Only to awake one more time, and find herself surrounded by calio cats. Not one, not two... three... five, seven, nine!? HOW MANY ARE THERE, HOW MANY, THIS CAN'T BE REAL, THIS MUST BE A BAD DREAM, A NIGHTMARE... a... night... nightmare... in her head.

Jesse went for the bed chamber, but actually wanted to observe the hallway to the gallery, though not having a bow or an arrow. It was... not very eventful.

Harper felt very safe being alone in the attic with PAMA, and took a long nap.

Mevia had to stand the closet imprisonment one more time - and definitely wasn't happy about becoming a regular here. On the bright side, since she is so used to it by now, she fell asleep even though Stampy tried his best to not let her.

CASSIE saw her probably last chance, and took it - she sneaked up behind Stella like a cat, and instantly covered her mouth to prevent any noise. Then she slowly strangled her to unconciousness, and dumped her in the basement. Now the cats would take care of the rest.

Stampy laughed at his prisoner, and tried to force him to stay awake. However, Mevia was mega-tired, and nearly instantly doze off despite standing.

The Last Day ☀

Finally, the guests had a clear lead! After ages of locking up poor Mevia and Stella being captured and terrorized by cats, her pet Lluna stole the solid evidence: A diamond axe, which belonged to CASSIE!! 🪓

They immediately had an emergency meeting at breakfast to discuss how to get rid of CASSIE the safest way. Then, CASSIE showed up for breakfast too - and one single moment of mutual gaze said a thousand words. Everyone stood up as fast as they could, but CASSIE was already running away - and Stampy, Mevia and Jesse rushed after her! (Without Stella, they stayed at the table because they felt a little labile from the nightmares still.)

Mevia swang her diamand axe and sprinted ahead, full of anger and bloodthirst to take their vengeance on Dan. Stampy was following right behind- oh, a CAKE!! Yum-yum!!! 🍰

For some reason, Sea was fleeing so super fast - oh, right! She didn't have her diamond axe on her anymore... Oh noo, she’s gonna escape the mansion before we can even grab her!! 🙁

Quickly, we need to corner her- Jesse tried to shoot ahead, but they were too tired - CASSIE's already at the front door, nuu- but then- CASSIE opened the front door and found Reuben already waiting for her, ready to push her down! In a matter of seconds, Mevia was there, ready to homicidally eliminate CASSIE herself. However, Jesse yelled to throw them out like planned, as they would not be any better to split Cassie in two halves. Mevia sighed grumpily.

They both dragged CASSIE to the center of the front yard, with the help of Reuben. Arrived, they gave CASSIE a deadly stare; Jesse asked if she had any last words. In fact, CASSIE had:

“LONG LIVE MY CATS! Wait, can someone feed them when I-", Mevia pushed her into the zombies, "TAKE CARE OF MY CATS”.

Then they left CASSIE to her fate.

As Jesse hustled to head back inside, they suddenly heard a splash - which sounded nothing like water. They turned around... Mevia was not behind them. In fact, she was in the back, having pulled out her axe which was now bloody. Oh welp... she really wanted to revenge Dan.

Right before the guests left the mansion for good, they found a small paper on the table. It showed where the cats are and what times to feed them. Nobody would give a damn.

(Worst ending ever... 😿)

The guests have won the game! 🍪

[cannibalcoalition]

Plus Interest- a short story

Those of you who have read Good, Clean Dirt will be familiar with the ill-advised genius of Reuben Weller. Here is a story which illustrates just how early on this instinct of rolling a series of ones and twenties developed. 1k words, contains bullying and mild violence. 

If there is one thing to know about Reuben Weller, it is that while he had historically been the victim of a great number of painful incidents (many of which being his fault), he was also keenly aware of the opportunities that may arise from pain.

It should be no surprise to anyone that as a young person he did not quite fit in. Now, if a student was a ‘teacher’s pet’ so to speak, they could avoid a lot of beatings by way of snitchery. This was not the case. A collection of teachers would agree that an apt description of Young Reuben could be boiled down to…

‘Too smart for his own damn good.’

And so it should be no surprise that a bloody nose was a common conclusion to school days.

Now, there are two ways to go about bullying. Well, to be honest, there infinite ways to go about bullying- but for the purpose of this demonstration of character we will work within a binary. The first is when an entire class decides something about a person and systematically ruins their life by way of building a bad  reputation. The second is when one person develops a strange fixation on another and feels an urge to destroy them.

Reuben was a victim of the first and then the second, in that order.

Now he could do nothing about that first one. Rumors are, by definition, vicious and long-lasting. But the second…

Bobby Michaels studied Reuben’s route home for about a week before laying a trap. It wasn’t much of a trap- Bobby was not particularly smart, but smart enough to know that if he was going to beat someone up it had better be well off school grounds. So he waited in an alley for him to pass before giving Reuben a daily ass-whooping.

And he did phrase it as his ‘daily ass-whooping.’

Reuben changed routes to avoid it, changed patterns, changed habits. But Bobby Michaels was smart enough to know that the boy was too lazy to go too far out of his way and he made plans around it. Eventually, he would find him.

This is the part of the story where most people expect a tale about how he learned to fight back, how he trained and trained and eventually joined the wrestling team and they won second place at state. However, since we are viewing this through the lense of nostalgia and we know, ultimately, how very not-strong Reuben was as an adult, it is clear that his story went in a different direction. Although, this was where he learned to run very fast.

As Bobby Michaels loomed over him smacking his fist into his palm in preparation for the oncoming beating, Reuben held up his hand.

“I’m going to have to ask for that money up-front,” Little Reuben said.

Bobby was rightly confused, given that the usual reaction to being cornered in an alley is to beg for mercy or try to run. His fist loosened, his shoulders sagged at the mention.

“What money?”

“What money?” Reuben asked, edging away from the wood fence that cornered him in. “Buddy, I’ve been keeping a tally on how much you owe me.”

“I don’t owe you nothin’.”

“Look, the first one was free, but I am clearly providing you a service here. This is my 39th beating. And with a first week entrance fee of $1 each, then the regular fee of $3 and a cumulative interest, you owe me $119. Plus tax.”

“Plus tax?”

“It’s a service, so you pay a service tax. I don’t make the rules, man!”

Bobby was silent for probably an entire minute, in which Reuben dared not move lest he alert his opponent to his plan. He could breathe again when Bobby started fishing in his pockets. “I-..I don’t got $119.”

“Alright,” Reuben said, faking a wince. “I know I kind of tricked you into thinking it was free, so we’ll uh... we’ll forgive the interest. But I can’t go any lower than $84.”

Bobby was distraught. “I don’t got that neither! Oh man, I’m gonna have to get a job.”

“Listen… Bobby- you know I’m trying to help you here. So what we’ll do is… I’ll put this whole thing on hold until you pay off your debt and then we can come back to it, just as long as you pay the fee in the future. Sound like a deal?”

Reuben held out his hand to shake, fully expecting Bobby Michaels to break his hand. But slowly, slowly, Bobby extended his hand in return and offered a weak handshake.

They parted ways, and Bobby never bothered him again until about a month later- when he approached Reuben in the usual alley with a sack of quarters and dimes. “I got your money,” he said.

“Oh good,” Reuben said, dreading the worst.

“My mom found out about this and she told me to go to counseling, so I ain’t gonna be able to pay back the...uh… interest.”

“You know… that’s okay,” Reuben said, looking for his quick exit. “I mean we shook on $84, didn’t we? $84 is enough. Debt forgiven.”

Bobby handed him the sack of coins. “So guess this is the last time I’ll be seein’ ya.”

“I guess so,” Reuben said. “How’s that make you feel?”

“I dunno, man. I kinda wanna punch you in the face.”

Reuben did a quick assessment of his life choices, but given that he was only twelve- there wasn’t a whole lot to measure up against and he figured that if you’re going to make mistakes, your youth is where you make them.

“You got three dollars?”

Bobby’s fist crunched against Reuben’s weak little jaw. The bag of change went flying to the ground, singing a tune of deep but satisfying regret against the weathered brick. As Reuben’s eyes refocused, he was aware of his face against the ground, Bobby’s hurried footsteps falling away from him, and twelve quarters stacked somewhere near his head.

And the lesson that he took away from this was not ‘violence never solved anything’ or ‘a sharp tongue is better than a closed fist.’ Instead, it was this:

‘There is a way to take anything and turn it into money.’

[grovyrosegirl]

MCSM Countdown Day 2

Hello! Here’s a little something I wrote for day 2 of the MCSM countdown! Today’s theme: Assembly Required. I hope you enjoy it! Cheers to season 2 coming in just a few days!

Summary: As Jesse and Axel head off to Boom Town to find Magnus, Lukas and Olivia are left to fortify the temple. With doubts arising, no sign of missing friends, and the end of the world quite literally in the horizon, what will the two decide to do?

“You’re crazy,” Lukas blurted out.

Olivia looked over her shoulder at the blond, one foot had already started moving down the staircase to the lower floor of the Order of the Stone’s temple, “Gee, tell me how you really feel, Lukas.”

He shook his head, following behind her as she began heading down, and attempted to catch up to her while also not tripping down the stone steps, “That’s not what I- that came out wrong. Olivia wait a sec.”

When the two reached the bottom, Olivia let out a sigh and turned around to face him, folding her arms as her silence signaled him to speak his mind. Lukas felt some relief in this, so far Olivia proved to be the more sensible person in the group, next to Jesse. He wondered if he would even be having this conversation if Jesse had decided to go find Ellegaard and left him with Axel. Still, Lukas noticed the frowns and looks of frustration on Olivia’s face ever since the two started working on making the temple more fortified. Jesse’s decision was bothering her, it didn't take a genius to figure that out, but she hadn't spoken a word about it until just a few moments ago.

“Look, I don’t think you're wrong. Having Ellegaard to help us would be good,” Lukas began, “but you can't just go off by yourself like this. It's too risky!”

“If you're that worried, then why not come with me?” She replied, her arms dropping to her sides as she resumed walking towards the hallway they’d entered from.

“Because I told Jesse I would stay here and get this place ready for nightfall,” He sharply retorted, walking next to her, “and so did you. What do you think is gonna happen if she and Axel come back here and we’re nowhere to be seen?”

“I know, I know!” Olivia groaned, her hands gripped into fists for a moment before she sighed and allowed the tension to ease away. Much more calmly, she said, “Okay, you're right, someone has to stay here. You should. The temple’s already pretty safe now, but someone needs to be here in case Petra gets here. But I can't stay here and just wait for them to bring back Magnus. We need Ellegaard, Lukas. Someone has to do that too.”

The young builder frowned, “You shouldn't have to go alone. I know it's hard, but maybe once Jesse and Axel get back then we can head to wherever Ellegaard is.”

“Redstonia. And we don't exactly have that luxury of time on our side, not with that Wither Storm still out there,” Olivia glanced downwards, her voice growing lower, “we don't even know how long it’ll be before that thing finds us here.”

A silence brewed up once more. For the past few hours as the two worked on the temple’s defenses, the large shadow of the Wither Storm in the distance turned the sky darker as if it were a horrifying eclipse. The darkness in mid-daytime certainly kept the unnerving dread in the air present. While they tried to ignore it as they worked, the storm only seemed to get bigger every time either one of them glanced at it. The monstrosity’s growls and screeches echoed across the view, sounding more grim than an approaching thunderstorm. Thankfully it didn't appear to be moving in the direction of the temple, but as Olivia said, who knew how long that would last?

And there was still no sign of Petra...

“I’ll go through the Nether, if the Order built those tracks there's probably a way to Redstonia. That way I can avoid the Wither Storm,” Olivia attempted to reassure him, breaking the quiet.

“You’ll be safe from the Wither Storm, sure, but it's still the Nether. We barely survived that place as a group,” Lukas said, keeping an eye on the floor as to avoid the pressure plates that set off the arrow dispensers from before. One step around the plate caused him to stumble slightly.

Olivia looked down at his odd foot movement before telling him, “You don't need to do that. I found the wiring for this hallway and adjusted it. The pressure plates won't set the arrows off anymore, now they only turn on if you pull a lever back in the library.”

“Really? Well that's a relief, thanks,” Lukas said. “You’re uh, pretty good with redstone, I see.”

She shrugged, “I mean, I’m alright with it.”

Lukas ran a hand through his hair, looking up to see the iron door they’d set up at the entrance growing closer. He looked at Olivia again, who kept her eyes looking down at the floor. The blond took a deep breath and sighed, stopping at the door.

“Look, I can't stop you. If you think this is the right move, go for it,” He raised his hand to grab the lever next to the door. With a small grunt, he pulled it down, causing the iron door to swing open, letting sunlight flood into the dim room.

“Thanks Lukas,” Olivia looked up and gave him a small smile, the first one either of them had seen for a few hours, “and if it makes you feel better, I promise I'll come right back if it gets too intense.”

Lukas returned the smile and nodded. Though it quickly dropped back into a look of worry as Olivia walked outside. The young engineer paused as she stood in the grass, raising a hand to shield her eyes from the light.

“Is it just me or,” She turned around and looked back at Lukas still in the doorway, “did it get brighter out here?”

Lukas rose an eyebrow and stepped outside, following Olivia as the two climbed up the hill, passing by the makeshift treehouse shelter from the night before, and caught a glimpse of the distance ahead. No longer was the sun hidden behind a mass of monster and flying blocks being tossed up by tentacles. The Wither Storm appeared to have shifted its direction and was slowly sliding across the horizon.

“It’s moving,” Lukas muttered, “but where's it going?”

Olivia shook her head, “As long as it's not here, I don't want to know.”

The two exchanged wide-eyed looks before moving back down the hill. At the foot was where the two would split up. Olivia walking towards the nearby Nether portal, and Lukas back towards the temple.

“Hey Lukas,” Olivia called out, making Lukas stop and look over his shoulder, “get the place nice for Petra!”

He couldn't help but let out a laugh and gave her a thumbs up, “I will! Be careful, okay?”

Olivia nodded and gave him a wave as she walked forward and disappeared into the purple light of the Nether portal. Lukas stood still for a moment, watching the light tremble before stabilizing itself. A faint echo of the Wither Storm caught his ear and snapped him back into action. He quickly ran back inside the temple, shutting the iron door behind him. The young man stuffed his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket and began heading back to the staircase.

“It’ll be fine,” He said to himself in a low voice, “it’s gonna be fine.”

He wondered how long he could try to lie to himself.

Lukas paused in his walking, shutting his eyes and releasing a long breath. He didn't know what forces ran the world or decided fate, but whatever or whoever did, he asked them to let at least one person come back. At least one. Jesse, Axel, Olivia, Petra, Reuben,  Aiden, Maya, Gill, or heck, even Gabriel. Just let him have someone come back. Just so he could feel some relief.

Just so he wouldn't have to do this alone.

[babylon-bitch]

Just Friends ~ We Weren't Ever Just Friends  (Part 29)

I know that the cover doesn’t do justice to the original but they are pretty good. That dress is really pretty though. Give me feed back honeys :) 

Harper White is best friends with Luke Hemmings, they always have been. Not only is she  friends with the rockstar, but with the rest of 5 Seconds Of Summer, as well as a really nice girl named Erika.

Harper has a few secrets, she can play all the instruments the boys play and many more. It’s a talent she has kept hidden, only very few people know.

What will happen to the six teens, wondering around the world together?

Warnings: mentions of depression and swearing

***

Only had one meltdown since I’ve been here, and I’ve been here two days. I went round to aunt Lauren’s house and surprised her. I was there for about an hour before I broke down, she asked why I’m here and I told her everything, more than my mum. I delved into my mental health more, I don’t like talking about it with my mum because she gets so worried and then won’t leave me alone. She told me about passed experiences and advised me to go see someone. Someone she went to about her depression and said it helped her so much.

She was really happy to find out about Luke and I, she squealed like the teenage girl she is. Lauren demanded all the details, which resulted in me crying. If we had to take a break, why are we even together?

The kids were all at school or nursery and Lauren’s husband Jonathon was at work, Lauren is a stay at home mum. It was really good to actually talk to someone without them pestering me, it was like therapy. We sat in the lounge for hours and just talked, she told me her problems, I gave her advice for her problems, I told her my problems, she gave me advice on my problems.

It was like having a sister. Lauren is my only aunt I’m in regular contact with. I hardly ever talk to my dad’s side of the family, mainly because they didn’t like my mother very much. For some reason though, neither of them seem affected by it. I’d say I’m closer to her than the rest of my family. Anna and Mark are Evie’s parents and I’m not too close to them, even though they live in the same country. Lauren is probably the second person I’m closest to, or at least top five.

We all know who the first person is.

There’s just something about her that makes her so approachable. Maybe it’s because she is a child at heart, she is 35, but acts 17.

The ‘therapy session’ was interrupted by Lauren having to pick up the kids, I came along to that too, and the look on their faces was priceless. They clung onto me for dear life.

I joined them all for dinner before going back home.

So far this whole trip I’ve felt this overwhelming sense of guilt, I’ve had endless texts from Erika and the other boys, none from Luke though, which I’m kind of grateful for.

It’s like he’s the only one that understands me when things like this happen. He knows to leave me alone, I’ll come round eventually.

Or he decided he wants nothing to do with me and has actually broken up with me.

In that case, shit.

He wouldn’t do that, right? Luke’s not like that.

I had a text from my mum saying that Erika came round and that she told her I’m at Anna and Mark’s.

Hopefully she believed that.

I have hardly been on my phone, only to change the song or text my mum. It’s quite nice to take a step back.

I visited my grandparents early this morning, they were just as surprised as Lauren was. I didn’t exactly tell her the reason why I was here because she was just like my mother. Funny that, they’re mother and daughter.

I’m currently round Lauren’s house, all the kids are here. They’ve just come back from school, so they are a little exhausted.

Lauren ordered me a pizza whilst she picked the kids up, so I’m eating that, the dog keeps trying to get some though, and so does Toby.

“Harp Harp, can I have some?” A little voice asks.

Looking to my right I see Toby standing next to me. “Here, one bite, you have dinner soon.” I warn and hold the crust for him whilst he takes his humoungus bite.

“Fank woo.” He says with a mouth full of food, and I burst out laughing.

“That’s okay.” I smile.

Deciding to show everyone that I’m not dead, and taking a picture of the pizza box with one slice in it, with the caption: oh shit.

Within seconds I get a notification from Erika.

@Erikaaa @Harper33 thank God, you’re alive

I like her tweet and put my phone down, groaning into my knees.

Why am I like this?

“You okay?” Lauren asks.

“I guess, am I being a bad friend?” I question.

“You’ve got to put yourself first sometimes Harper! You’ve got to be selfish to make yourself better. They need to understand that, if they want you to get better they need to see that. It’s okay, they’re not going to hate you. Yes, it might hurt them a little with you leaving without any warning, but they can get over that if they are true friends. Things might be awkward when you go back, but hopefully you’ll be on your feet again.” She reassures.

“Right.” I nod and give her a small smile.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it. I know how you work, and drop that guilt, that’s not going to help you.” Lauren claims.

“Okay.” I sigh.

Because I’ve got no one my own age around, I text Delilah and Laura.

Me: hey, I’m in england for a while, don’t tell anyone though because I haven’t told my friends back in Aus. It’s a long long story x

Laura: hello :) what a pleasant surprise. Do you want to meet up? X

Delilah: hiya, I’ve got detention, but I’ve only got like half an hour left. Where do you wanna meet? X

Me: in town or at my place, I’ve got the whole house to myself.

Delilah: your house

Laura: that’s decided then, thanks Del 😑 see you in an hour or so x

Me: okay, I’m at Lauren’s right now, see you in a bit x

Delilah: bye bitches

Laughing I lock my phone and start to get up, only to be met with a whining sound.

Lily pouts up at me and grabs onto my hoodie. I lift her up and hold her on my hip, which seems to cheer her up.

“I’m gonna head home, I’ve got some old school friends coming over to my house. Laura and Delilah, remember them?” I ask.

“Vaguely, have fun sweetheart, see you again tomorrow?”

“Yeah probably.” I smile and put Lilly down.

Gathering my stuff, well I say stuff, I mean my bag with my stuff in it, as well as my phone.

“Bye then.” She says and pulls me in for a hug then kisses my cheek.

“Bye lil’ munchkins, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I grin down at the exhausted kids.

I giggle as I see that they’re too sleepy to make a fuss about it.

“Bye.” I wave as I close the door behind me.

Reuben waves when I walk passed the window and I laugh as I wave back.

***

Everyone is here now, Delilah’s boyfriend tagged along. I made a cake whilst I was waiting for them, it didn’t finish in time, but it was in the oven my the time they were here.

Turns out he is a really good singer, Delilah showed me a video of him secretly singing in the shower and he blushed and hid in a pillow whilst grinning.

His name is Elliot and he is an alright guy, very funny. I can see why Delilah likes him. I’m just gonna get this out the way now, he is a total babe. He is so hot. Black almost brown hair, in a short quiff.

Now I’m not gonna go cheat on Luke with him, but I’m not gonna deny that he is attractive.

“You both are good at singing, why don’t you guys make a video?” Laura suggests.

“You can sing?” He ask.

“A bit yeah.”

“A bit? The girl can sing better than Hayley Williams.” Delilah claims.

“Okay, that’s a bit of an overstatement.” I accuse.

“No, honestly, she is one of the best singers I’ve ever heard.” Laura agrees.

“Do you play any instruments?” He asks.

“I play the ukulele.” I tell him.

I give Delilah a warning glare and she gives me a confused look before looking back at Elliot.

“Have you ever written any originals?” He questions.

“Yeah, I’ve written a couple.” I shrug.

“Her boyfriend is Luke Hemmings, of course she has.” Laura chuckles.

“Actually, he doesn’t know, no one does, besides you guys. So feel honered.” I admit.

“Why?” Laura asks.

“Long story, but do you want to film this video?” I ask Elliot.

“Sure, what’s the song?” He asks.

“It’s an original, I’ll give you a run down on what to do in a minute.”

I went and got my camera, lights, and ukulele.

Giving him my idea and him nodding his head. This song is called Creep, I wrote it a while back.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ineNlkIGXCc

***

I laugh and turn off the camera. He really is a good singer, his voice was really satisfying, it was like his voice were puzzle pieces and they slotted in perfectly. “Wow that was really good.” I grin and hug him.

“You were great,” He smiles down at me.

“Thank you, so were too.” I say.

“Well done guys.” Laura says as she comes back in.

We both smile at her.

“Best thing I’ve ever had, it gave me an eargasm.” Delilah follows.

“That’s a way to describe it.” Elliot furrows his eyebrows

“What are you guys doing this evening?” Laura asks.

“Nothing besides uploading the video, why?” I ask.

“Do you wanna go out?” Laura questions.

“Like out out or just out?” Delilah questions and I laugh.

“To a club?” Elliot ask.

“Yeah.” Laura nods

“I don’t know…” I trail off.

“Oh c'mon Harps, live a little.” Delilah nudges my ribs with her elbow.

“Its only half six now, we’ll leave at 9 or 10, you’ve got plenty of time to get ready.” Laura reasons.

“I’m going.” Delilah says.

“Me too, I’ve gotta fend off men from my girl.” He chuckles as he wraps his arm around Delilah, and kisses her head.

“I’ve literally got nothing better to do.” I shrug. “Haven’t you guys got school in the morning?” I ask.

“We can skip, or at least the morning.” Laura tells me.

“Usually Del is the ‘badass’ but this time Lau is, what happened?” I chuckle as I bump shoulders with Laura.

“What can I say? I’ve been around her for so long now that her habits are brushing off on me.”

“I’m gonna go home and get ready.” Delilah says.

“Okay, let’s meet back here at like eight, maybe half eight,” I explain, “Oh and I’m gonna post the video whilst I wait. I’ll send it to you, what is your number, or social media name?” I ask Elliot.

“I’ll give you my number.” He smiles and I pass him my phone whilst he passes me his phone.

put my name as girlfriend’s hot best friend.

“That’s a name…” He laughs.

He put his name as Harry Potter and I laugh at it. “Okay, bye then.” I smile and pull each of them into an individual hug.

Luke p.o.v.

I don’t know who that guys is but I hate him. He might even me related to her, I don’t care, all I know is that I hate him. And he is a really good singer.

I was scrolling through Twitter when I saw that she posted a video, being the good boyfriend that I am (or not, I haven’t talked to her, it looks like she has moved on) I decided to watch it.

They were both really good though, I’ve never heard that song though. It was a very pretty song.

The words were quite bold, and it made me worry about her. If she was that bad, surely she would of reached out to me.

I heard she ran off and nobody can find her, I’ve been pretending that I don’t care, but fuck, I care so fucking much. I want her back in my arms, safe and sound, more than anything. I don’t know if she is okay or not, it’s sort of sending me into a frenzy to be honest.

Erika is really upset and surprisingly angry about it all. Understandably so, I mean, if your best friend ran off without any warning and won’t return her calls at all, you would be mad and upset. Erika likes things to be normal, hates change, so I can understand why.

I really don’t know if she is okay, I’ve just got this feeling that she is a mess. I want to help her, but I don’t know where she is, or even if she’ll take my help. Which suck, it sucks balls, but it’s her way of dealing with things, I guess.

Usually she is an absolute trooper, but I guess it all just got to her this time. She still is a trooper, she’ll always be my little troop.

I’m currently scrolling through Twitter, deciding to check up on Harper. I have her notifications on, but I was busy at the moment so I just swiped them away. There were about two or three.

Searching her name, then clicking on her profile and scrolling down. There is an empty pizza box with the caption 'oh shit’, scrolling up I see her in a very revealing dress.

Hot damn, she is doing an innocent pose, yet the dress is anything but innocent. A huge slit in the middle, exposing a bit of cleavage, then it ends mid thigh. She’s not exactly showing that much off, but you can see everything.

Only I’m allowed to see her like that.

She looks great don’t get me wrong, outstandingly sexy, but why does she need to wear a dress like that?

That wasn’t a selfie either, somebody else was with her. I’m not trying to be controlling, but when your girlfriend (possible ex-girlfriend) hangs around with a guy, has a super sexy dress on, and somebody else takes a picture, you get a little nervous.

We set down a rule that we weren’t going to sleep or be intimate with anyone else whilst on this break, whether she has given up on me and already moved on or not, I don’t know. I don’t think she is the type to do that though.

I miss her, I really do, we haven’t even talked in ages. I’ve only had second hand information, I regret this whole thing. It does make it easier for her in a way, because I’m on tour she has to do all these extra things just to talk to me or us, and it’s wasting her time.

As much as I love being on tour, I’ll be glad when this one is over.

“Dude, have you seen Harper?” Calum asks.

“Yes.” I snap, a little harsher than intended.

“Alright, chill man.” Calum says.

“Sorry, it’s just, why is she doing this? Only I can see her like that. Why is she posting but not talking to you guys?” I ask.

“You were the one that told us to give her some space.” Ashton chimes in.

“It’s almost like she is playing games with us.” I claim.

“No, not at all. I think she is trying to tell us that she is at least alive, but doesn’t want to talk to us.” Michael adds.

“Why?” I question.

“That, we don’t know.”

***

It’s the next day now and pictures have surfaced from Harper’s night out. Her getting cosy with that guy she filmed a video with, there’s no kissing or anything, just her sat on his lap, or his arms around her.

That should be my lap and my arms around her. There is no one I recognise in the pictures, besides that dude and her.

Hopefully she didn’t drunkenly make out with him, then things would be completely over.

I couldn’t sleep all night because I was worried about her. I hate how much I love this girl. She could be a psycho murderer and I would still love her. If we do break up, I will always love her. No matter what happens I will. She’s been my crush for years, I started to develop feelings for her when we were 13, 14 and I didn’t really know what they were, so I just pushed them aside.

My heart literally broke when I heard she was moving back to England, my seven year old self didn’t really have anyone to play with after that.

She fell out a tree once when she was 13, and broke her wrist, and something clicked (not just her wrist) I don’t know what happend, I started looking at her in a different way, I saw her in a different way, was even more protective of her. Something changed between us and it hasn’t really been the same since. It wasn’t a bad thing, things just weren’t the same after that.

We held each others gazes for a little too long, held each other a little more than normal, constantly kissed each other, just on the cheek or shoulder, we weren’t simply just friends, and I don’t think we ever were, or will be.

I was about 16, possibly 15 when I realised I was in love with my best friend. That scared the hell out of me, I thought I was going to ruin it all.

She got a boyfriend at 14 and I don’t think I’ve ever despised someone so much, he took her first kiss, and that hurt me. At the time, I didn’t know why I was so jealous, and upset that he took her first kiss.  There were other reasons why I hated him, he took Harper away from me, and I was left on my own.

When they broke up a couple of months later, and Harper was crying in my arms, I could help the ear to ear grin that was plastered on my face. That made her mad though.

When she was sixteen and her lowest point, I felt so useless and helpless because I didn’t know how to help her. She tried to push everyone away and blocked us all out, but we both knew she needed us more than anything. Harper was so ashamed of what she had become, claiming 'I don’t want you to see me like this’.

I can’t lose her, she is the person that truly knows me inside and out. Yeah, the boy’s no me really well, but there’s something about Harper. Maybe its because she’s my soulmate or because I’ve known her so long.

[sanctimoniousscrawlings]

Journal Entry #2

Or Cognitive Dissonance in Perception of Personality: An essay of negativity

    I see myself in an extremely negative light. I know it’s unfair to myself but I can’t seem to shake the feeling that I’m basically scum. I see myself as a selfish failure of a manchild with extreme anger issues and a severe lack of motivation. The thing is, all of those things are correct, but so is the opposite viewpoint.     I went to (one of) my best friend’s (we’ll call her S) birthday party about a month ago and there were nine of us. After a while of sitting in a circle and playing some tabletop games, my friend’s boyfriend (A) made the observation that we were sitting in a pattern where the most similar personalities were sitting in triangular formations. My triangle was my friend, another girl (R), and myself- which according to A was the triangle of kindness. I, being entirely too self-absorbed and fairly high on the spectrum, responded with, “Me, kind? Where?” because I genuinely don’t perceive myself as being very kind (and definitely not nice like S and R are). He was quick to remind me that they’d been borrowing my car for a month-and-a-half and that when I found out they had no vehicles (one was stolen, the other completely broke down and was basically totaled) I immediately offered to lend them mine. (Ironically this screwed me and my grandparents over because it was our only vehicle with four-wheel drive and we ended up snowed in for a week.)     So maybe I’m not always selfish- but I do selfish things so often that I feel it’s a core trait of mine. I’m constantly “borrowing” money from my grandparents- that I still live with at nearly 27 years old. Borrowing is in quotes because it’s always with the pretense that I’ll pay them back when I can (and sometimes I do) but also with the shared knowledge that I probably won’t be able to any time soon. My grandmother waves me off when I’m upset that she offers to take care of something for me because she “knows I’m good for it/knows where I live” and because I help her do things she wouldn’t be able to handle on her own like taking care of my grandfather who has been acting like he’s completely incapable of doing anything (ex: we have to serve him everything he eats if we’re home bc he’s ‘too weak’ to get up and do it himself, but if we leave him alone or turn our backs for a second his diabetic ass will race to the kitchen and eat stuff he’s not supposed to have. This man makes and scarfs down triple decker sandwiches faster than 625/Reuben.) which he is not, for the most part. He’s disabled, but he isn’t anywhere near as disabled as he acts.     I see myself as a failure for the same reason I see myself as selfish. On top of that, I have little to no impulse control. If something I should be doing is in the way of something I want to be doing I will 9/10 times completely pass what I should be doing over. I don’t have a strong will when it comes to taking care of myself/my life/etc., but I’m extremely willful when I see something I want. I will do the impossible to make it happen especially if someone tells me not to or that I can’t. For fuck’s sake, My grandmother’s suv got stuck in the snow when she was trying to back into place and I got out and lifted the front end/pushed the car back so it wasn’t stuck- which brings me to my next point: anger.     I am fueled by an immense rage at all times. I jokingly say that everything I do, I do out of spite but it’s not exactly distant from the truth. The angrier I am, the more driven I become and I get mad easily. My grandmother worries for me because I am extremely similar in personality to her- the second someone tells her she can’t do something she goes out and does it because fuck you, that’s why. I told her she shouldn’t go outside with all this snow because she’d likely get very sick and might get pneumonia. Unbeknownst to me, she immediately walks the trash down to the bins at the end of the driveway- at the other end of our 5-acre property- because she thought I was saying that as a joke at her expense. The next day she’s coughing and sneezing and miserable and admits she went out. I had to explain that not only is she too elderly to be doing things like that (the phrase she originally found offensive when I warned her the first time) but she’s grieving and depressed because her sister had literally just died a couple days before and that grief/depression weakens your immune system. Like, no, lady. You’re seventy and dealing with not only the death of your sister but the fairly recent death of your aunt. Your immune system isn’t gonna exist for a minute and you will die if you go within 500 feet of a preschool, let alone trudge through a quarter mile of snow. You don’t even own snow boots or a heavy jacket.     I’m getting way off topic there. Anyways. I got pissed because I signaled my grandmother that I was ready to start pushing her SUV, which was stuck in the snow and she a) spent a minute adjusting stuff while I was pushing after giving the signal instead of immediately hitting the gas and b)let off the gas when she saw how red I was turning because she thought it was from the strain (the only strain was on patience). I got madder when I started putting groceries away because there is ALWAYS shit (by which I mean the laundry basket) blocking the freezer door from opening all the way and stuff also fell out of the freezer when I opened it, and the door to the laundry room had stuff blocking it from opening all the way and I started throwing stuff because WHY DOES NOTHING EVER COOPERATE? Honestly, I’m still salty about it but more of a vaguely jaded salty than an “I need to break stuff because I’m irate and all cognitive function flies out the window when I’m this mad” kind of salty. I’m basically the hulk but I turn red and stay the same size.     I ended up guilting myself for hours after mistreating my cat because I was in a particularly venomous mood from being in so much pain. Her only crime was being in my way and almost tripping me several times when I was trying to feed her so I started flicking water at her whenever she would come near me. It was cruel and I still feel really bad about it- especially since it’s basically how my mother treated me when I was a child (ironically when she was going through the same tooth pain I am now) and it was one of my mother’s traits that made me always say I’d never be like her.      It’s also only little things that ever do that to me, though. When something happens that should by all logic tip me over the edge, I become cold and calculating. This is with all forms of stress, too. Grandfather fell on a vase because he didn’t drink his juice before getting out of bed and his blood sugar was low? There’s blood everywhere and my grandmother is running around like a chicken with its head lopped off? I got this. Abusive and controlling (to my little primo) aunt calls to tell my grandparents they aren’t allowed to see my cousin anymore? I was so irritatingly calm and matter-of-fact about telling her exactly what I thought of her my grandmother could hear her shrieking through the phone on the other side of the house and had to stop herself from cracking up when she saw how pleased with myself for making a grown woman (I was 15) throw such a tantrum. Girl my boyfriend cheated on me with tells me so- and that they’re dating now? She was more frightened at how quickly the rage visible in my face evaporated than anything, which was a mistake on her part.     But why can’t I do that with the little things? Why can’t I reason with myself? Is it because I can’t plot any more satisfying revenge for the inanimate objects that get in my way than to yeet them into another dimension? Because there’s no vengeance to be had on something that should prove to only be a minor irritation? It’s the same with pain. If someone purposely causes me pain, I’ll crush them without emotion, but something like a toothache I can’t do anything about (because I was snowed in) turns me into a monster (in fairness I wanted to take a sledgehammer to my face the entire time). Is it because I’ve trained myself not to be helpless- but when things are too minor for me to go into eye-of-the-storm mode (for lack of better description) I panic and feel helpless and lash out? I hear jokes like “hell hath no fury like a minorly inconvenienced gay man” and I also hear that people with severe trauma/mental illnesses/etc handle huge problems immensely well compared to others, but can’t deal with the little things- but like, why? I get that I’m a manic depressive gay guy and had an exceptionally shitty childhood but why can’t I handle the little things. I know, logically, that they don’t matter, but what do I do when that logic goes out the window? How do I drag myself back to reality when I’m throwing a block of frozen shredded cheese at the ground because it won’t. Stay. Put.     And how do I motivate myself to actively make the changes to make myself better? Because right now I am a lazy fuck slumming it in a pile of dirty clothing and half-empty water bottles, between mountains of books and other unknown items like a hoarder because I still haven’t fucking cleaned my room. At all. To my credit, I have done some cleaning in my grandmother’s office. Not much, but some.

    A different best friend of mine has always liked to joke that I am a creature of contradictions because I have always had opposing personality traits- always shifting from one extreme to another and never in the middle. Is it normal to have such divergent personality traits? Is it because I am bipolar?

[rosetintedglassesbs]

R🖤.....19.03.16

And I’m still in love with you,real love never really fades,

What the hell am I thinking,definitely too baked rn,but even when I’m lacking in basic motor skills my thoughts are still filled with the thought of you,I’m craving you,but by no means do I want to be craving you,my mind never wants to shut up about you ,because every thought process right now just leads back to you,

Do you ever think of me?,do you ever feel anything I feel,sometimes I’m numb to the thought of you other times the memory of you just hits me,it comes in waves and sometimes I’m drowing,do you? Or did you ever feel like,

Do you ever miss me?,even if just a few seconds do you miss me the way I miss you,

Sometimes for a crazy insane second I wonder if we could ever made it work,and a times I believe hell fucking yeah,we made it through some of the low times whatever was the issues then we would of made it,but that’s thing even after 3 attempts at trying to be together a small part of me always think that maybe in different circumstances we could of survived all odds,I feel like the end we let everything tear as apart,we lost the will,what loss the purpose and meaning of why we were actually together,we stopped trying to fight against everything that was trying so hard to let us quit,and we gave in,we were strong enough.

We were never given the right start,we never stood a chance.

And that’s why at times I realised there wasn’t a chance in hell we could of made it work,when we shattered everything we touched,we were falling out of love with each passing day,and although you probably think I never felt the way you were falling out of love and how hard it was too keep living with someone you just didn’t admire anymore you didn’t adore,I felt it too,believe me I felt all of it,and I could feel you not feeling it anymore,because I never told you,but I felt that too,the days went by and so did the feelings I had for you,I would spend small moments staring at you,but I felt like I was looking at stranger I couldn’t pick out one thing I loved about you anymore,in fact I started to resent you,sex felt like a chore in the end that was one of the first of many things to come to a bitter end,you didn’t excite me anymore,sex felt like I was fucking someone I didn’t know,it became weird,kissing you didn’t make me feel all warm and loved,instead it made me feel cold it made me feel lonely,it made me feel like we were just trying to convince each other that we still had something left,we were lying to each other,

When you cheated,at the time I hated you and I didn’t understand why someone who claimed to love me would FUCK some random girl,but I got it I understood in a fucking twisted way I got it,and I couldn’t blame you for it,because sleeping with someone else was what I would constantly be thinking about,I wanted attention I wanted to to feel something,and when I cheated,you didn’t pass my mind for so long,it’s almost felt like you didn’t excisit,it felt like I didn’t have a clue who you even were anymore,so no I didn’t feel bad,it felt good it felt like for once I just did something for myself,it was wrong,I know that...of course a few hours later I soon realised how shit you must of felt when you slept with someone else to,it was a horrible gut feeling,but I couldn’t cry....you put me through so much upset you broke me heart,that as sick and nasty as this sounds I wanted you to feel everything I did,I want you to take the pain for once,and that’s why I was never Sorry,I was just sorry I played the same game you did.

But I’m sorry,if I could back I probably would of gone back to the hotel that night,because I knew it was ending but I could of been the bigger person and end in on the terms of just not being able to make it work,not because I cheated and couldn’t stand you,and hurting you didn’t feel the way I thought it make me feel,I felt like my heart was also breaking along with yours,I felt your pain every inch of it,and although you deserved to once carry the pain,I wish at times I didn’t do it,but even to this day I believe our relationship died months before the leading to the final blow out of us,we were barely together and even you would agree,just neither of us had the balls to walk first,so we kept living this bitter sweet lie.

But I’m crazy,I believe that maybe one day we might look back on ‘ us’ and laugh and think god we didn’t have a clue what we were doing but at one point god we really loved each other,fucking hell it was real,maybe we’ll try again or maybe I’m just losing my head,

What I’m saying is I miss you,I miss when in the middle of the night I wish I could turn over and snuggle into you while you sleepy pull me in closer to you,

And it’s been a year,and it’s still you...it’s always you.

and I can claim I didn’t love you in the end,but I think that’s when I was realised how fucking much I love and adored you,how much I just wanted you,on the last night we ever slept together and I laid there and it clicked just as I was losing you,that you were the only person I wanted to the spend the first of my life with,the person I wanted a family with,the person who was the one,who was my forever,and that was one of the first moments when I realised I was in love with you,and that your touch was the only touch I wanted to feel for the rest of my time here,and being snuggled next to you felt like time had paused I wanted to freeze time I never leave that moment,we both cried and laid there and realised that was it,we couldn’t do it anymore,we both for once felt the same feeling,before that moment happened....we spent good half an hour saying it all the hurtful things we could of think to each other,but we couldn’t keep up I cried,you cried,and just before falling we said goodbye knowing this moment would never happen again,that all of it was over,the future we thought we were gonna have is ending to,and kissing you for the last time felt like fireworks were going off,but I didn’t want that it was too late,I felt everything to late.

But when you left I learnt how to shut out my feelings pretty quick,when you came to pack up all your things,I couldn’t cry,I didn’t feel anything in fact,I just helped you,and we stood there and smoked making small talk,and then you stood up,looked at me and hugged me,and I wish I never let go,you kissed me on my forehead and said goodbye for the final time,and a part of my world shattered that very second,and I tried to speak but I couldn’t bring myself to say goodbye so I just weakly smiled and you walked away for the final time,

So again if you have worked it out by now,I’m in love with you,I’m still in love with you Reuben,and I don’t know how to stop this,I never stopped loving you,because what we had was real,

But I feel like this is probably a sign I’m losing my head,because your happy,you’ve moved on,and I will forever respect that,I just wanted to once again get this off my chest,even if this is something you will never read,probably a blessing there,because what we had meant nothing to you,you don’t feel everything I do not anymore.

[flauntpage]

Notes and Quotes from Doug Pederson’s Monday Presser, with Context

Doug Pederson confirmed on Monday that Darren Sproles will miss the rest of the season with an ACL tear and broken arm.

The Birds running back and punt returner walked off the field under his power after suffering both injuries on the same damn play in Sunday’s 27-24 win.

Pederson said that Byron Marshall will be “part of the thought process going forward” as the team looks for a roster replacement. Torrey Smith is expected to return punts.

Jordan Hicks and Fletcher Cox are expected to be “okay” and are “day-to-day” with a calf and ankle injury, respectively.

More from the head ball coach:

Does part of the offense go out the door without Sproles?

“I don’t think so. I don’t think so. I think what you saw with Wendell (Smallwood) yesterday, and even some things with Corey (Clement).. you know, it’s going to have to be that ‘next man’ mentality. But I think Wendell, on third down specifically, and Corey as well, are going to have to stand up and assume that role. It’s always been the next guy up mentality and that’s kind of where we’re at right now.”

Context: Smallwood and Clement both had some success running the sweep/stretch plays that Sproles is so good at. 

This is an example of a carry that probably would have gone to Sproles:

Was there enough data to determine whether you should have gone for it on 4th and 8?

“There’s definitely enough data out there. Now, with all of the technology, you can go back and, listen, I don’t study it like our guys do upstairs, but there is enough data. You can go back 10 years and gather a bunch of information. It really makes the decision making – obviously it’s ultimately my decision – but it definitely puts a nice light on the decision if you decide to do that.”

Context: Kyle wrote a bit about it here: Dumb and Dumber

Who do you communicate with regarding that data?

“Ryan Paganetti.”

Context: Paganetti is listed as “Coaching Assistant/Linebackers” on the Eagles’ website. He was an analyst for the Birds from March, 2015 to May of this year.

How does that work?

“Really we talk every day during the week leading up to the game. During the game, the communication between he and I is, we even talk on second down, you know, ‘be prepared for (this)’ or ‘maybe expect this.’ Those questions and scenarios, we’re beginning to talk, those situations we’re actually talking on second down. When we get into those situations, those areas of the field, where it might be a ‘go for it’ situation, or ‘hey, let’s get the points here, let’s do this,’ whatever it might be, we have those conversations early in the series.”

Context: n/a

4th and 8 historically has an 18% success rate, are you good with that number?

“Well my number that we went off of, and I don’t know where you got your information, was 33%. It’s actually a half percentage point in our favor and it comes down to basically a 50/50, where we were on the field. That comes down to my decision. It was my decision, ultimately.”

Context: This was a Reuben Frank question. I don’t know where that 18% comes from and didn’t see anything on his Twitter feed about it. Again, I think the 4th and 8 had less to do with nuance-free data and more about in-game flow. The play looked a lot worse because Carson Wentz took a terrible sack. If this was an incomplete pass, the Giants would have started at their own 43 instead of the Eagles’ 49.

WATCH: @DevonKennard takes down Wentz on 4th down, #NYGiants ball! http://pic.twitter.com/DZQVFlKCNt

— New York Giants (@Giants) September 24, 2017

Did the play of the defense factor into that fourth down decision?

“Most certainly. Offense was actually playing well, defense was playing outstanding. That factors into a lot of those decisions on fourth down. The other two fourth downs that no one’s talking about are the two fourth and inches that lead to touchdowns. 67% on fourth down in a game is pretty good. Then, ultimately, our defense on fourth and goal did an outstanding job to keep them out of the end zone right before half.”

Context: Ding ding ding ding ding! We have a winner! Everyone will rip Doug for a shitty 4th and 8 call, but won’t give him credit where it’s due. Twice in this game his aggression extended drives and led to touchdowns. 

On the left guard rotation:

“I think there was some positive with both players. Chance (Warmack) had a couple of opportunities, missed opportunities, early in the game, but bounced back in the run game and was effective. At the same time, Wis getting an opportunity, listen, Wis is that veteran player. You know when you put him in that he’s going to execute and do some nice things for you. It’s something we’ll evaluate again this week going forward. By Sunday, we’ll have the best five out there.

Context: Wisniewski played about 58% of the snaps. I don’t see any reason why he shouldn’t be starting next weekend. 

Where does that leave Isaac Seumalo?

“He’s still in the mix.”

Context: Is he? 

On Odell Beckham, Jr.’s dog pee celebration:

“Listen, I’m really not gonna comment on that. But our players see it. Our fans see it. It’s one of those things I think you just kind of file away in the back of your mind. You just remember those things and you move on. It’s unfortunate. I have to control our guys obviously, and every other coach has to control their players, but it’s something that, you don’t want to see it in the game. I think it takes away from a great play that he just made. But, you know… yeah.”

Context: 

Odell Beckham pretending to be a peeing dog is really what this day needed http://pic.twitter.com/POmzWtdSzM

— Dave Lozo (@davelozo) September 24, 2017

Here’s ODB’s explanation:

“I scored a touchdown. I’m a dog. So I acted like a dog. I didn’t know if the rule book said you can’t hike your leg. He [the official] said I peed on somebody. So I was trying to find the imaginary ghost that I peed on. But I didn’t see him. But either way it goes, you play football. I wear red and white. I don’t wear black and white with stripes on it. I don’t make calls. I just play football.”

Notes and Quotes from Doug Pederson’s Monday Presser, with Context published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

[theedblog]

Hey-O! The only thing I love more than the football season is the couple weeks leading up to it. So much hope...so much promise...mmmmm yeah. I’m no Pro Football Focus but I do have doodles to go along with my much less researched opinions so it pretty much evens out. I’ll break my 2017 Preview down by Division, including The Ed’s All-Division teams and Divisional Offensive Player of the Year, Defensive Player of the Year, Rookie of the Year, Breakout Player of the Year, and the most important new comer to each division. Just a heads up, I added a FLEX position on offense which is available for any RB, WR, or TE. On Defense I was pretty open ended about Edge, labeling them either LB or DL. This was just so I didn’t leave out any top tier players in a division that happened to be full of good D-Linemen and thin on Linebackers and vice versa.

We’ll start our tour with the NFC West. The division that was seen for a brief moment as the new tough guy division. The Niners/Seahawks rivalry was the new Steelers/Ravens (puh-leeeeez). This was the lunch pale division for the length of a tuna melt sandwich and a cup of joe barely enjoyed with greasy hands on a steel beam sixty stories up. But then Jim Harbaugh left and we all woke up and remembered what this was...a group of goddamn west coast elites (amirite? right?!). Even the Legion of Boom just kinda bitches about stuff now. Let’s take a look at how the ol’ NFC West is gonna shake out.

All NFC West Crew:

QB - Russell Wilson, Seahawks

RB - Dirt Johnson, Cardinals

TE - Jimmy Graham, Seahawks

WR - Doug Baldwin, Seahawks

WR - Larry Fitzgerald, Cardinals

FLEX - John Brown, Cardinals

OL - Jared Veldheer, Cardinals

OL - Mike Iupati, Cardinals

OL - Andrew Whitworth, Rams

OL - Justin Britt, Seahawks

OL - Joe Staley, 49ers

DL - Mike Bennett, Seahawks

DL - Aaron Donald, Rams

DL - Chandler Jones, Cardinals

DL - Markus Golden, Cardinals

LB - Deone Bucannon, Cardinals

LB - K.J. Wright, Seahawks

LB - Bobby Wagner, Seahawks

DB - Richard Sherman, Seahawks

DB - Patrick Peterson, Cardinals

DB - Earl Thomas, Seahawks

DB - Kam Chancellor, Seahawks

Offensive Player of the Year - DangerRuss Wilson, QB - Seahawks

Defensive Player of the Year - Aaron Donald, DL - Rams

Rookie of the Year - Reuben Foster, LB - 49ers

Breakout Player of the Year - Robert Nkemdiche, DL - Cardinals

Comeback Player of the Year - Robert Quinn, DL - Rams

New Comer of the Year - Andrew Whitworth, OL - Rams

This division was actually pretty easy. There weren’t too many tough choices. The offensive Flex position could’ve gone to a couple different guys. I thought about calling a Todd Gurley return which is very likely but that team is going to be shit and they’ll be abandoning the power running attack before half most games. In that Arizona offense John Brown is going to get his deep looks one way or the other. Even if the second best looking and second best quarterback of the Hanson Brothers (not sure if any of them can play or not, I just have a hard time saying Blaine Gabbert is the best quarterback in any group of people) ends up playing, the rock is going deep in the desert. Carlos Hyde was also a thought but he’s starting to feel like the Sam Bradford of running backs. Every year is ‘the year it all comes together’. The only really tough choice was going with both the Arizona edge guys over the other two edge rushers in Seattle or Robert Quinn. But Cliff Avril and Frank Clark are going to be rotational players (very good ones to be fair) and Quinn is coming off a couple down seasons. I gotta give the edge (no pun intended) to the Arizona boys. I wanted to put Navarro Bowman at linebacker over Deone Bucannon but I just can’t believe at this point he will put together a full 16 game season while Bucannon is a dynamic talent with the potential to hit an elite level of play.

As far as rookies in this division go there are a few good ones. Solomon Thomas is my bet to be the best of the bunch but I get a feeling they are really going to stretch his abilities thin in a variety of roles as a rookie. Hasaan Reddick is another one that will be good but he is switching positions and is likely to play behind Karlos Dansby early on. Budda Baker is going to be a fun player to watch and a great compliment to the Honey Badger (the nickname combos should be great) but is a guy Arizona will have to move around to find his best position as a pro. He will also probably start out playing behind a veteran (Antoine Bethea). Gerald Everett will get touches for the Rams but he’ll have to transition from a small school to the NFL at a position that already sees a lot of guys struggle with that jump. Reuben Foster is not only pro-ready but actually going to a more simple defense where he will just be asked to chase and tackle. At the combine he really showed how well suited he was for playing linebacker in the NFL. We didn’t get to see him run a 40 or do reps of 225 because he got kicked out of the combine for going ape shit on some lunch lady asking ‘DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!?!!’ showing supreme confidence and blind rage.

Former first round O-linemen like Josh Garnett and D.J. Humphries were options as breakout candidates but it’s tough to picture guys like that making as big an impact as stat getters (gatherers?) like pass rushers, running backs, etc.. Maurice Alexander was a thought. He should be really good as a full time starter for L.A. this year in place of departed T.J. McDonald. However, he may end up playing high safety too often to really rack up tackles in the box. Instead, I think Robert Nkemdiche has a Jadeveon Clowney kind of impact this year. He may not be a double digit sack guy yet but like Clowney he should start hitting his stride as a dominant run defender. Give him some time to get them dreads out and he’ll be a damn spitting image of former Cardinals bad ass, Darnell Dockett.

Comeback player in this division wasn’t close in my opinion. Robert Quinn is a former All-Pro pass rusher who is still young enough to bounce back from a couple down seasons. It helps he plays with maybe the best defensive player in the league, Aaron Donald and will fill the rock star position in Wade Phillip’s super aggressive defense. He will have the green light to get down field this season and I suspect he gets back to form.

San Fran has loaded up with new faces but they are mostly all just place holders on a bad team. The Seahawks will win this division regardless so I’m looking to the future when it comes to this division’s best new comer. Less-pretty-and-probably-less-good-at-Quarterback-Ryan Gosling (I find myself having the same problem with Jared Goff as I do Blaine Gabbert) has zero chance of being worth all of those draft picks if they don’t at least give him a chance to throw the ball. So bringing in one of this generation’s best offensive linemen was a smart move for the Rams (awful move for Whitworth however). We should get a better look at Goff as an honest to god QB and not just the face of the organization this year.

Dirt ‘David’ Johnson was the only real contender for the NFC West’s Offensive Player of the Year but as soon as Carson Palmer goes down in week 6 this team will start going to shit real quick. It’s hard to pass over the best QB in the division playing for the best team in the division (Russ Wilson).

There are some truly elite defenders in this division. Maybe more so than any other in football and yet it wasn’t even close. Aaron Donald was the best defensive player in football last year and as long as J.J. Watt is having constant back problems Khalil Mack is the only real contender for that title.

Seahawks win this division. Even with an absolute shit offensive line they should sweep the Rams and 49ers and I’d guess split the Cardinals series. Next up...The AFC West.

[photomaniacs]

Apple Joins Instagram to Feature the Best #ShotoniPhone Photos http://ift.tt/2hCq4mV

Apple just joined Instagram. An unlike most other brand accounts, the new @apple handle won’t ever feature ads or announcements for products and services. Instead, it will be used for one, single purpose: to feature the world’s best #ShotoniPhone photos.

One of the first 9 posts uploaded to the new account is this video in which iPhone photographers around the world share their thoughts about the power of photography:

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:15am PDT

Each post on the account is a slideshow that features a set of images or videos by different photographers. Here are the first 7 of them:

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Mirabai M. @mirafilm “Beekeeping is incredibly addictive. Once you start, it’s very hard to stop. I think I’ll probably be a beekeeper for the rest of my life.” – 2. Jeremy S. @jeremysnell “I do show people the photos I take of them. A lot of these people have never really had their picture taken before, so this is really special to them. I think it opens people up in a new way, when they are able to see themselves in an image.” – 3. Daniil S. @daniil “I want to show the backstage – we’re surrounded by so much beauty that we take for granted. For us it’s so common. We don’t see the beauty anymore.” – 4. Marcelo N. @marcelonava “I like to walk, exploring a city, knowing every little space within the world.” – 5. Dave S. @davesandford “An adrenaline rush? Quite the opposite actually. I find swimming with sharks to be very peaceful.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:10am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Paul O. @pauloctavious “I’ve just always been attracted to rainbows. It’s like magic. But now that I know how rainbows are made, it’s like I’m performing my own magic.” – 2. Tyrone P. @robotfaced “I’ve actually found two or three, or let’s say two and a half, species of chameleons that are not officially known to science. You can’t look in a text book or a field guide and find these animals. There’s simply not enough known about them.” – 3. Jirasak P @joez19 “I live in a small town and own a small trucking fleet in Thailand. I am not a professional photographer.” – 4. Jenn Z. @thesdcowgirl “I feel claustrophobic when I go to the city now. You get so used to being able to see for miles. I call it cowgirl church.” – 5. Yais Y. @_yaisyusman_ “I call the series The Hanging Collection. It’s simply creating an illusion of a person hanging.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:11am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Dawn D. @dawn_denfeld “When I was diagnosed with degenerative spinal arthritis, I needed to find a hobby that didn’t require a lot of walking. Now, I love to capture water drop refractions and reflections on flowers, dandelions, and cobwebs that I gather from my garden.” – 2. Chinami M. @1000wave “My grandmother is constantly laughing whenever we shoot photos and I always enjoy seeing her smile. I’m just a greedy grandchild, hoping to squeeze as many smiles as I can.” – 3. Kevin R. @kevinruss “The sounds at this chapel were unlike any sounds I was hearing anywhere else. So I added sound to the photo just to have people feel what I felt.” – 4. John D. @abstractconformity “As captain of a ship, I go around the world. At times, we’ve gotten voyage instructions from the office and literally had to go get an atlas off the shelf cause we’re like, ‘Where in the world is this?’”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:13am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Kathy R. @kathyryan1 “It’s the New York Times building, in the middle of Times Square. It’s not an ordinary building, but it’s one building and honestly it could keep me occupied for life.” – 2. Gregg B. @greggboydston “I work for the United States Forest Service on the Hotshot Crew. We go to wildfires and help put them out.” – 3. Michael Z. @symmetrybreakfast “Since 2013, I have been making breakfast for my husband every day.” – 4. Khasar S. @inomad “I’m lucky that what Mongolia offers, even in the 21st Century, are people and cultures that still pass on centuries of tradition to future generations.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:14am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Shawn T. @_xst “I love it when people find out that they’re in a photo because the reaction is so beautiful. They’re like, ‘Oh my God! How did you get this and when was it shot? I didn’t even see you!’” – 2. Laura I. @lauraiz “The person in all of these photos is my daughter. She is my first kid. Every little cliché about love is what I feel about Joey.” – 3. Percy O.A. @fotombo “My poetry and my photography go hand-in-hand.” – 4. Danilo L. @danilo “I’m attracted to everything experimental.” – 5. Laura Z. @laurazazanis “I had to tell my neighbors what I was doing, because now that I do this all the time, they’re gonna think that I’ve lost my mind, dropping all these crazy things into the pool everyday.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:17am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Ryan P. @ryanpernofski “I think it’s normal to have fears of a monster that swims around. But I guess the percentage of getting eaten by a shark is so small. I think if it happens, as long as I get a photo of it, I’ll be OK.” – 2. Caitlin R. & Derek E. @itsmoosethepug “We are really big pug fans.” – 3. Reuben W. @itsreuben “I just like to have a feeling of discovering something new, even though I’m not actually discovering something new. Everything has been discovered now.” – 4. Noora A. @nooora91 “I love the view of a model going forward. It gives me a sense of strength in going forward fearlessly.” – 5. Hannah R. @subwayhands “The subway is a funny place. You’re on it every day, but always with different people. So there’s this weird familiarity and also a little bit of guardedness.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:18am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Maurice H. @bloomandplume “If people like photos of flowers and people like photos of me, why not just put the two together?” – 2. RJ P. @rockadeezy “The landing is the hard part. If I really want to be horizontal I land on all fours. Like a cat. But if the ground’s too hot, or it’s hard terrain I’ll land on my feet.” – 3. Jeryl T. @j9ryl “Just because I’m colorblind doesn’t make photography a guessing game. There’s always a direction I want to go. A mood I want to create.” – 4. Britainy W. @lanadeathray “Owls are kinda like the ninjas of the bird world. Like, that mouse never saw it coming.” – 5. Koci H. @koci “I can walk outside, tap a piece of glass, and suddenly I’ve captured something. With another tap, I can share it with the entire world. If that’s not magic, I don’t know what is.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:19am PDT

#ShotoniPhone by… – 1. Fabien B. @fabienbaron “These photographs are my personal mood board. This is what I see and like.” – 2. Jess R. @jessronagrooming “If I could choose only one type of dog to groom for the rest of my life what would it be? Oh my gosh. A poodle!” – 3. Josh N. @bellpayphoneproject “This is street furniture that’s been around for almost a century and it will be gone soon. Gone forever… and I’ll be telling my grandkids about this nerdy project where I took pictures of phones with a telephone.” – 4. Brock D. @brockdavis “I’ve created so many things just to make my kids laugh at breakfast time.” – 5. Olivier C. @oli_op “I am drawn to things that look mundane at first, but then become magical because you’ve changed one factor – the speed at which you see it.”

A post shared by apple (@apple) on Aug 7, 2017 at 5:20am PDT

Apple tells PetaPixel that over 1 trillion photos are now shot every single year on the iPhone, making it far and away the most popular camera being used in the world. The company wants to highlight the diversity of what both amateur and professional photographers are doing with the camera.

If you’d like to be featured by Apple, all you need to do is use the popular hashtag #shotoniphone on Instagram. If Apple is interested in showcasing your work in front of its global Instagram audience, the company will contact you and inquire about the potential feature, which would include a quote from you and a credit and link back to your Instagram account.

Go to Source Author: <a href="http://ift.tt/2sXK2JQ Zhang</a> If you’d like us to remove any content please send us a message here CHECK OUT THE TOP SELLING CAMERAS!

The post Apple Joins Instagram to Feature the Best #ShotoniPhone Photos appeared first on CameraFreaks.

August 07, 2017 at 06:03PM

[racingtoaredlight]

Another RTARL way too soon NFL first round mock draft 2017

It’s NFL Draft season! Next weekend will be dominated by the NFL Combine, which would be dominated by the troops if they all showed up but will instead be just a bunch of football players hanging out in shorts and t-shirts. I thought it would be fun* to do another mock draft now before the disappointments and surprises that the combine often affords.

I had this whole thing about punching strict Constitutionalists worked out in my head but I lost the urgency of that feeling. This would have been the header image for that post. Forget you ever read this if I get around to doing that post.

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Myles Garrett knows what I’m talking about. He’ll be punching Consitutionalists on the reg in Cleveland. Both on the field and, if he’s truly heroic, off the field. But I swear I’m not writing about that now. Just doing an awesome mock draft about all of the awesome matchups that I come up with based on sources** that are proprietary to RTARL. I’m drafting based on perceived team needs and will take credit for direct hits: if I get the right player to the right team, if I get the correct position, if the player drafted is from the same college as the one in the same position on my draft, if the players share a first or last name, if the team drafting is the one I have listed, if there is a trade.

1  Cleveland Browns

Myles Garrett, DL, Texas A&M

He’s the best player and the Browns need everything. It’s sad that he will spend all of his career battling injuries but such is the lot of a Browns.

2  San Francisco 49ers

Deshaun Watson, QB, Clemson

The 49ers will have zero QBs under contract once Colin Kaepernick opts out of his contract (why is that happening, by the way? He won’t get as much money and he won’t start anywhere else.) Watson doesn’t really strike me as an NFL star but I don’t think that even matters at this point for the 49ers. If he can be soul crushingly boring like Alex Smith that’s good enough.

3  Chicago Bears

Jonathan Allen, DL, Alabama

The going theory among people that, no shit, make a living writing about the NFL Draft is that Allen is going to drop closer to the tenth pick. The Bears suck all over and I’m just sticking him here because I forget what they really should do.

4 Jacksonville Jaguars

Leonard Fournette, RB, LSU

The hottest thing in draft blogging is to overvalue Dalvin Cook. I may be blinded by how much I hate Dalvin Cook but I really think his medical profile is going to be a lot worse than people realize. Well, shit, I guess that’s a possibility for Fournette, too. What the fuck ever, it’s the Jaguars.

5 Tennessee Titans

Mike Williams, WR, Clemson

I think the way Williams plays works pretty well with the way Marcus Mariota plays and he’ll be a 100-catch machine in no time.

6  New York Jets

Patrick Mahomes, QB, Texas Tech

From what I’ve seen Mahomes is the consensus fourth QB in the draft but he’s got the best arm and he’s got, in my eyes, the best chance to be a huge bust. If that isn’t a Jets player I don’t know what is.

7  Los Angeles Chargers

Jamal Adams, DB, LSU

If Adams is as good as his recent press then this is the best pick in the draft. I can’t wait to buy a last minute ticket to watch him in front of 20,000 other slightly invested fans playing on a field built for boxing.

8  Carolina Panthers

Corey Davis, WR, Western Michigan

I’m 95% certain the Panthers will not pick a receiver here but it seems like a good fit to me and all I keep hearing about is how shitty the OL prospects are for this draft.

9  Cincinnati Bengals

Malik McDowell, DL, Michigan State

Huge, insanely athletic, maybe not always motivated but awesome when he is. This is a Bengals if ever there was a Bengals.

10  Buffalo Bills

David Njoku, TE, Miami

I’m gonna level with you: I have no idea what any team actually needs. Playing in Buffalo the Bills should just have a bunch of TEs and run some version of the Run & Shoot that involves 5 TEs on the field at all times. Njoku could totally be the Haywood Jeffires of that arrangement.

11  New Orleans Saints

Reuben Foster, LB, Alabama

Back in the late 80s and early 90s the Saints had the best collection of LBs of any team in the NFL and that seems impossible based on every other era in team history. Foster is getting hype that makes me imagine him fitting in with Rickey Jackson, Sam Mills, and Pat Swilling. Is he that good? Who the fuck knows. Aaron Curry was supposed to be the safest pick in NFL history and he sucked horribly.

12  Cleveland Browns

DeShone Kizer, QB, Notre Dame

Kizer is way too good to be held down by the screaming murderer in charge of Notre Dame to hold him down any longer. Hue Jackson will get the most out of him.

13  Arizona Cardinals

Garrett Bolles, OL, Utah

He’s already old which fits in with what the Cardinals are doing as a team.

14 Indianapolis Colts

Forrest Lamp, OL, Western Kentucky

This might actually be the Eagles pick. It’s going to be decided by a coin flip. I like putting Forrest Lamp here because he has a good name and I wanted to write it. The Colts are an Andrew Luck injury away from complete disaster so an OL pick seems likely.

15  Philadelphia Eagles 

Dalvin Cook, RB, FSU

Cook and Wentz can be 8-8 together for years to come.

16  Baltimore Ravens

Marshon Lattimore, CB, Ohio State

I’m totally just pulling names out of the air right now. It seems crazy that there would be no CBs picked until 16 but I didn’t have an OL go until 13. That isn’t happening.

17  Washington Redskins

Quincy Wilson, CB, Florida

Washington needs to find a QB of the future but there isn’t anybody left to rate this highly.

18  Tennessee Titans

Cam Robinson, OL, Alabama

This makes sense, right?

19  Tampa Bay Buccaneers

O.J. Howard, TE, Alabama

Remember that year the Jets and Giants both wasted first round picks on shitty tight ends? Howard reminds me of Derek Brown.

20  Denver Broncos

Ryan Ramczyk, OL, Wisconsin

I think Ramczyk is having hip surgery but the Broncos are taking an OL in the first round come hell or high water and this is the name that stood out to me from the list of names I was looking at as I wrote this.

21  Detroit Lions

Takkarist McKinley, LB, UCLA

I wanted to give the Lions something nice and I think McKinley is a star.

22  Miami Dolphins

Zach Cunningham, LB, Vanderbilt

The Dolphins seem like the flukiest team in the league and I don’t remember them being very good anywhere but on the defensive line. I might not even be correct about that.

23  New York Giants

John Ross, WR, Washington

Ross could be a great deep threat opposite ODB’s greatness and if they can stay healthy the two of them together could really help the first pick in the 2018 NFL Draft. Is this a good pick or something the Giants would actually do? Probably not. I’m not good at predicting.

24  Oakland Raiders

Soloman Thomas, DL, Stanford

The Raiders need a ton of help on defense and this is theoretically the best draft in a long time to address that side of the ball. Thomas is a top-10 level talent but I think there’s such a glut of front 7 talent that a lot of those guys are going to fall quite a bit.

25  Houston Texans

Budda Baker, S, Washington

I listened to some podcast about the draft that had the Texans taking a QB here and I laughed at the idea of an NFL team being willing to admit so quickly how badly they planned last season. Those same guys described every pick as an interesting situation and made Budda Baker seem like the second coming of Ed Reed. So I’m stealing part of their jive.

26  Seattle Seahawks

Antonio Garcia, OL, Troy

Everybody on the planet expects the Seahawks to draft an OL and then not know how to develop him. I’m picking names out of a hat when it comes to OL guys here, if you weren’t aware.

27  Kansas City Chiefs

Christian McCaffrey, RB, Stanford

I haven’t seen anybody put McCaffrey here but it seems like an awesome fit to me. Andy Reid could put him to good use all over the field.

28  Dallas Cowboys

Haason Redick, EDGE (!!!), Temple

Last year the Cowboys got all of my pre-draft favorites so I’m gonna make that continue and give them one of my favorite players in this draft. Redick is a preposterous athlete who came to college as a cornerback and then grew into a defensive lineman. He’ll probably be more of a linebacker in the pros but he should be a total nightmare in the best of ways wherever he lines up.

29  Green Bay Packers

Teez Tabor, CB, Florida

I listen to / read way too much online scouting. Tabor isn’t falling this far.

30  Pittsburgh Steelers

Jordan Willis, DE, Kansas State

The Steelers also grab a lot of the guys I really like. Year after year they do that, actually, and they mostly don’t end up as good as I expected. Willis is like the platonic ideal of a pass rushing end so expect him to turn into a linebacker somehow in Pittsburgh and get a bunch of sacks in 2021 on his way to a crazy contract in Jacksonville before he gets cut a year later.

31  Atlanta Falcons

Taco Charlton, DE, Michigan

Good lord there are too many good pass rushers in this draft. I don’t see any consensus yet on which ones stack up where but I do know that I don’t really like Charlton as anything more than a space killer in the NFL. He’s big enough and strong enough to not be a sinkhole but I don’t trust him to rack up stats, either. Atlanta needs some guys like this.

32  New England Patriots

Corn Elder, CB, Miami

I have every bit of confidence that Corn is going to come out of the combine with a lot more fans in draft world than he has now. It’s not like he’s a low-rated player but he’s going to test a lot faster than people realize. Did I just make it through the first round without about 20 players that I think should be first rounders? Yes I did.

* stabbing yourself in the eye with a protractor is similarly fun if you’re looking for things to do today

** other mock drafts

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[shsmpulse-blog]

The Anthelion Chronicles, Chapter Three: The Mystery Blogger

By: Maria Pantazopoulos, Sec V

“Reuben you won’t believe this,” Adelaide shouted as she walked into his house early one Saturday morning.

Hearing her shout, Reuben looked up from his vacuuming and removed his Walkman headphones. Knowing that she probably had a long story to tell, he watched his friend walk in and make herself comfortable in the large armchair in the living room before asking, “Believe what?”

Adelaide leaned forward in her chair, holding out her hands to stress what she was about to say. “My house,” she said, pausing for even more emphasis, “is haunted.” Adelaide leaned back in her chair as she said this, as if the statement was so shocking it knocked her backwards.

Reuben raised an incredulous eyebrow at her.

“I’m serious, Rube,” she pleaded with him. “I know it sounds crazy, but I’m telling you. I woke up at 12:30 last night and my laptop was open on my desk and my chair was pulled out as if someone was sitting there. I never leave my chair pulled out.”

At this, Reuben crossed his long arms across his chest. “Adelaide, that is literally the lamest proof you could have ever come up with. This sounds like a bogus story.”

Now it was Adelaide’s turn to cross her arms. “It’s not bogus, Marty McFly,” she mocked. “The computer was open to a blog that definitely wasn’t mine and the keyboard was clicking on its own. It was like something invisible was sitting there typing, and then as soon as I got up, poof,” she made a disappearing motion with her fingers. “The screen went dark and the chair was tucked in as if nothing had happened.”

“And how do you know that you didn’t just dream all this up?” Reuben asked.

“Reuben, I know what I saw,” she retorted. “Don’t you believe me?”

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” the vampire sighed, eager to continue with his vacuuming.

Adelaide smiled slyly. “I was hoping you would say that.”

Realizing that it was going to be a while before be could get back to his cleaning, Reuben sat down on the floor in front of his part-spider best friend. “You have a plan, don’t you?” he asked.

Adelaide nodded exaggeratedly. “You’re gonna come over to my house and we’re gonna have a seance. Tonight. We’re gonna lure this demon out and find out what it wants from me.”

Once again, Reuben sighed. “Okay, I’ve got two problems with this plan,” he said. “First off, when did you decide that this thing was a demon? And secondly, seriously. A seance. Like in those ghost shows we make fun of. Do you really think that this is gonna work? Also - okay, third point here - what are your parents going to say about this? They’re never going to believe that you have an actual ghost-slash-demon thing living in your house are they?”

“I understand your concern and I have answers for all your questions,” Adelaide said as if she were reciting from a well-rehearsed script. “First of all, I have no clue what this thing is apart from the fact that it’s invisible. It might be a ghost, it might be a poltergeist, it might be anything, I don’t know. Maybe it’s a demon trying to slowly consume my soul, we really don’t know and for that reason alone you should be prepared to help me with this.”

“Second of all,” she continued, “Yes, a seance. How else do you expect to be able to contact this thing? Plus, I’ve been dying to use the ouija board my uncle got me for my birthday. Lastly, it was my dad’s idea to invite you over for this, and my mom said it was fine as long as my brothers were out of the house. They’re gonna have a sleepover at my cousin’s tonight so it’s all set.”

Reuben smiled slightly to himself, secretly excited by the prospect of investigating a paranormal occurrence, but not wanting to give her that satisfaction. “Sure, whatever,” he grumbled aloud.

Adelaide jumped out of the armchair with excitement. “Great!” she exclaimed. “Let’s get going then.”

***

As soon as they walked into the house, they were greeted by the sound of screaming children and the sight of a young boy jumping down from the ceiling.

“Hi Ada,” he called to his sister, followed by “you’re really big,” a comment clearly directed at the tall stranger standing in the doorway. The young boy then ran away from the pair and began climbing up the living room wall, then crawling across the ceiling.

“That’s Isaac, he can crawl across walls,” Adelaide explained to Reuben. “And that over there,” she said, gesturing to another boy sitting on the carpet surrounded by Legos, “is my other brother, Cecil.” Reuben noticed that Cecil had another set of arms sprouting from his rib cage, a trait he no doubt inherited from his arachnid ancestors.

Before Reuben knew what was happening, a tall man with a shaved head was shaking his hand.

“You must be Reuben,” the man said to him. “I’m Frederick, Adelaide’s dad. So glad you’ve volunteered to take care of this little demon problem we seem to have. Of course, we don’t know exactly whether or not it’s a demon. Maybe it’s a ghost or a poltergeist or some other kind of spirit. In any case, it shouldn’t be too difficult for you to make contact with it, I mean you are undead, after all. Oh wait, that’s a touchy subject isn’t it? So sorry if that came across as insensitive.”

“I - er - uh -” Reuben stammered, taken aback by how fast Frederick spoke.

“Fred, you’re scaring the boy,” called a woman with eight violet eyes from the top of the stairs. “It’s so nice to see you again, Reuben,” she said as she walked down.

“You too - um - Michelle,” Reuben replied hesitantly.

Adelaide’s mother smiled, and turning to her daughter, said “Adelaide, your father is going to drive your brothers to your cousins now. You kids can watch TV or something for a bit. It’s only about noon now and I’d imagine that you’ll want to wait until sundown to start your ghost hunting. Oh! Before I forget, Reuben, I got some coconut water pouches in case you get hungry, Adelaide told me you liked those.” She then walked away from the two teenagers and into her office just off from the living room.

Once Frederick had left with Cecil and Isaac, Adelaide and Reuben sat down on the carpet in the living room and watched reruns of The X Files on TV. At about 5:30 the sun went down, and it was time to start ghost hunting.

Adelaide gathered some flashlights from a hall closet and led Reuben to “the scene of the crime,” her bedroom.

“Ok, so according to a Buzzfeed video I watched at two in the morning, flashlights are a great way to communicate with spirits. You have to, like, balance the switch between off and on and then not touch it. Then you can ask them yes or no questions and if the answer is yes, they’ll flip the switch to ‘on,’ got it?” Adelaide said to Reuben, who began arranging the flashlights on her bed while she was talking.

“Yeah, um, that's great but what if the flashlights just go off on their own for whatever reason? Also, don't you have a ouija board? Wouldn't that be much more effective?” Reuben asked, always the skeptic.

Adelaide frowned at him, “It’s a process, Rube, and we're only on the first step, alright? The next step is the ouija board, and after that it's full-on exorcism mode.”

Still unconvinced, Reuben said “Alright, let's get this over with,” and then, addressing the possible entity in the room in a very loud, showy voice said, “Spirit, if you can hear us, we’d just like to say ‘hi.’ Welcome to Adelaide's room. From what she's told me, you've made yourself quite at home. Turn on one of the five flashlights we have placed here for your convenience if you can hear me right now.” There was silence for a beat, then one of the flashlights turned on and back off again.

“Dammit,” Reuben complained. “Spirit, I owe Adelaide five bucks now because that worked, I hope you're happy.” Once again, the flashlight flicked on and off. “I'll take that as a ‘yes,’” he sighed.

Adelaide lit up some scented candles and pulled a box out from under the bed, beginning to  set up the ouija board. “I think it's time for a more sophisticated form of communication, now that we've made contact.” She and Reuben placed their hands on top of the metallic circle that was supposed to indicate the letter the spirit was trying to show them.

“Spirit,” Adelaide called into the dark, “you can use this board now to talk to us. You just have to move our hands over the letters and you can spell things out for us, alright?” A moment passed, then their hands began moving without notice. “S-U-R-E,” Adelaide spelled aloud.

After this first message, Reuben jumped back and stood up, wiping his hands on his jeans as if they were dirty. “Nope, nope big bag of nope. I don't want little demon hands moving my hands around, nope,” he said disgustedly. “I'll ask it questions for you if you want, but I'm not touching that thing anymore.”

“Fine then,” Adelaide conceded. “I want you to ask about its name, what exactly it is and what it wants. Not all at once, obviously.”

“Okay, that I can do,” Reuben said nervously, his voice cracking a little. He cleared his throat and asked “Spirit, what is your name? Or is there, like, something that we can call you?”

Adelaide's hands began to move again. “L-E-S-L-I-E. Really? Your name is Leslie?” She asked incredulously. Her hands moved again, this time only spelling Y-E-S.

Reuben continued with his interview. “Okay then, Leslie. Can you tell us what exactly you are? Like are you a ghost or a poltergeist or-”

“I-D-K-M-A-N,” Adelaide spelled out before he could even finish his thought. “I'm getting the feeling that it doesn't want to tell us. That's not exactly reassuring but okay,” she said.

“I only have one more question for you, Leslie,” Reuben said. “What do you want from Adelaide?”

There was a slight pause, then Adelaide's hands moved. “W-I-F-I. Leslie wants wifi?” she mused aloud.

Suddenly Adelaide’s laptop flew open on the desk, and a shadowy figure began to materialize sitting in her chair. It was hard for them to make out features, almost like they were looking at a blurred photograph.

“So - uh, I'm Leslie. Hello,” the shadowy figure said dryly. “I got kinda bored with your little letter game so I figured that it was a lot easier to manifest before you kids and just speak like normal.” Leslie said this casually as if it were the most usual thing in the world for mysterious figures to appear before teenagers.

“To answer your questions, I’m a shadow person, and I don’t really know how to explain that but, um, yeah I’ve been stealing your wifi for months. I don’t know what your family is doing, Adelaide, but you’ve got the fastest wifi in Anthelion and I need it to keep my blog up to date. Oh, and I’ve also been using your laptop in case you haven’t noticed. Sorry if that inconvenienced you in any way.”

       Adelaide stared at Leslie for a moment, trying to make sense of what was going on. It was Reuben who broke the silence first. “Okay then,” he said, trying to hide his confusion and slight fear. “That is more than enough weirdness for one night. I’m gonna go downstairs and keep watching the X Files. Goodnight everyone.”

Once Reuben was out of earshot, Leslie spoke again. “He’s a weird one. Does it really bother you if I stick around and use your computer once in awhile?” he asked Adelaide.

“Not really, I mean you’ve already made yourself pretty comfy in here anyway. As long as you don’t bother me during the day, or the rest of my family ever. Especially not my brothers,” Adelaide stressed.

Leslie shrugged. “I don’t have any interest in you or your family. I just really need a place to blog from. I’m not really into eating souls or anything, I’m on a paleo diet and making people upset is some serious bad karma that I do not need in my afterlife.”

Adelaide could not decide what was weirder, the fact that she had a shadow person living in her home, or that the shadow person was using her wifi to run an aesthetic blog.

“Okay, then I guess I’ll just leave you to it,” she said hesitantly as she backed out of her room, still trying to process what was going on. She walked downstairs and into the living room to see Reuben sitting on the carpet with a coconut water pouch, watching the X Files on the lowest possible volume to not bother her parents. Being a vampire, Reuben did not sleep, but Adelaide was exhausted after all that had happened that night. Without saying a word, she collapsed face first onto the couch and fell asleep.