#(​even for asexuals but like a nonsexual sexy haha)

[mcalhenwrites]

A lot of those novels have spanking (of varying kinds) in them, btw...

Below a cut bc I'd rather not have this like out in the open on people's dashes haha

Brackish is mostly about spanking kink between Basil (Christian) and Cassidy. It's also the story that - aside from the prologue - I've written from scratch the most. Basil does go into his childhood spankings a bit, bc they even prompted him to run away as a kid. He hated them and has a rough relationship with his parents. He's the dom and I WROTE THIS BEFORE 50 SHADES DO NOT @ ME ABOUT "CHRISTIAN" HE GOES BY BASIL ANYHOW, and besides his name wasn't Edward first :P Geckos, Automata deals with a lot of themes of abuse, and there is one spanking that happens "on screen" but otherwise they're in the background. A background theme is that abuse fucks you up... it even makes some people try to end the world. None in Teacup. The Hostile Credence is not your medieval typical fantasy, but it does have the normalization of beating your kids. Though many characters are against it/do not get raised that way. It's all off-screen though, mostly just mentioned or implied. The Dragons' Cosmos... Roscoe's dad is heavily patterned after my own. Absolutely unhinged, and child abuse in many forms. But it's only implied/happens off-screen. Before our Ghosts is fucked up. Bertrand has a spanking kink, but it's hard for him to do anything about his fantasies since his childhood was so traumatic. He thinks this part of him is "broken and dirty" :( Adversary further goes into this... this is one I'm so afraid people will not understand, so I tend to be scared to go into it. But it deals with two kids who discover they're spankos when they're young. They're physically punished in a very fucked up and religious cult. (Parents are even permitted to kill their children without punishment, bc "the kid must have deserved it" is the assumption.) A lot of people report that when they were young, they'd look up the word "spanking" in the dictionary (I DID THAT) and search for books with spanking scenes (I also did this). I wanted to translate that experience bc... I hate spanking IRL outside of consensual adult kink, and Adversary is meant to drive home what it's like for it to cause childhood trauma. But I fear I might find pitchforks at my door instead if it ever finds the wrong crowd. I've already been told that children are the ones who are fucked up if they get off on spanking. Which makes Adversary so necessary of a story to tell... Rascal does touch on similar topics, but it mostly focuses on Hazel being comfortable as a spanko with Ferdinand as his dom. It's mainly meant to be sexy and cute. A counterspell, if you will, to the darker stories. (It does have a bit of angst in the main story, though.)

Stargazers' Hill has some threats and an off-screen whipping (that was originally on-screen, but I preferred to switch it over to another POV), but like other stories, it was mostly part of the background of such a rough childhood. :( Serrated Petals is... well, unhealthy dubcon/noncon stuff that has some spanking between the three men

Outside of the spanking erotica I've written, my short standalone stories don't have any spanking.

The Will of the Whispering does mention child abuse, but the main character, Lester, is breaking a cycle as he raises his children. So it's more about his own childhood and what he's definitely not doing to his babies. Good for him for trying his best? :) Planetary Boundaries has mention of Trace and Andy having abusive parents, but both are in new situations almost immediately at the start of PB. There is mention of abuse/neglect with Sigurd's background, but "we can't be bothered to supply these wards of the state with food on a really distant planet more than once a year" is more of a government-related issue.

In the Pleasure Seekers series, Xavier is an asexual Incubus who ends up finding disciplinary (nonsexual) benefits in being spanked by his boyfriend. Zach mentions getting punished by his grandfather sometimes and hating him for it, but it's mostly just about Zach spanking his partner...s... (They are poly later, no spoilers!) Where the Lanterns Glow is like many of my stories, where spanking is a background thing? Spanking is actually unheard of outside of witching communities, and Nolwen's father slipped a couple of times even within those witching communities bc he felt pressured when Nolwen acted out. (Later, he finds out why his son acted out and feels like a monster.) Nolwen and Evander have some spanking kink they experiment with, and this all started bc I liked the idea of potion spoons getting used in kink... Magic swinging swatters, anyone? They're adorable. Evander is the one who gets spanked, mostly, but Nolwen is sometimes curious what it's like, so they switch. Rarely, but they do.

So yeahhh anyway. Sorry for the ramble if you read that hahahaha

[forthegothicheroine]

How other great detectives would solve the disappearance of Rowan Morrison from Summerisle

A series I do sometimes. I think most horror fans know the basic idea behind the original Wicker Man, but if you don’t and want to avoid spoilers, scroll away.

I don’t think most of these detectives are virgins- maybe Miss Marple or Poirot, but maybe not- so I’ll be assuming that for ritual purity purposes, just refusing Willow will have to be enough.

Sam Vimes: Haha. Haha. Oh wow, haha. Picking a detective who’s already an apathetic polytheist sure throws a wrench in Lord Summerisle’s plans! Vimes starts arresting people when he arrives and basically doesn’t stop, mostly for child endangerment (don’t send your children to go jump over fire! there are plenty of murderers out there to do that to them!) He starts kicking back on the other side of the door when Willow starts singing until she gives up and goes away. There’s still some strong danger here since Vimes would fulfill the role of a man who came with kingly power (oh boy he’d hate hearing that!) but Vimes does have one advantage Howie doesn’t have: a loyal team. Lord Summerisle said that no one would come for Howie- maybe he was right or maybe he was bluffing, but he’d sure as hell be wrong where Vimes was concerned, and that’s assuming they got him to come here without any other Watch members in the first place. Without dying or after death, he’s pulling this place down.

Columbo: Here’s the best omen for Columbo’s success- I didn’t think of it until this list, but Lord Summerisle dresses exactly like a Columbo villain! Anyway, schlubby little Columbo solves his cases more or less by pecking at key suspects until he can figure out which ones are lying to him, so I think that bodes well here. He steps off the plane and finds everyone clearly lying to him; he takes out a notepad, writes “THEY ALL DID IT”, and gets back on the plane. Or maybe he could steal a boat and escape later at night so I can give him the chance to annoy Lord Summerisle ("Mythology, huh? My wife has a book about that, very interesting stuff. You know, I thought it was kind of funny how that inn was called the Green Man. See, in that book, Sir Gawain goes to meet this green man with the force of the whole round table behind him, but they’re planning to test and then kill him. Funny thing, right?”)

Phryne Fisher: This makes so much more sense if it was Jack they were after and due to plot hijinks, Phryne ended up there instead of or in addition to him. She has sex with Lord Summerisle almost immediately, and the village isn’t really sure if that counts as breaking ritual purity or not (Willow doesn’t seem like her type.) Besides the ritual purity, they have to deal with the fact that she does not have the authority of a king- she probably doesn’t even have police permission to be here! This whole operation has been a tremendous cockup on the cult’s part.

Dale Cooper: Despite being friendly where Howie was prickly, Cooper has a lot in common with that other doomed policeman who came to a creepy town to save or avenge a young girl. Things might go more or less the same as they did in the movie, but there’s one circumstance under which he might get out with his life. Willow bangs on his door naked, singing a sexy song, and he opens the door for her. She’s a bit disappointed that he failed the test, but instead of going along with the seduction, he tells her that she’s too young for him but that it looks like she could use a friend, and that he thinks she might be lonlier than people realize. Maybe- just maybe- the first genuine offer of nonsexual friendship she’s had in years might break through to her, and she might start to talk.

Philip Marlowe: I love Marlowe, he’s my guy, but I don’t think he’s getting out off this. He’s thrown naked girls out of his bedroom before- why should he think this time is any different? He and Summerisle have nice long chats about history and literature, but in the process he demonstrates that he has a very strong sense of morality and propriety (if not religion) and that he thinks of himself as a sort of fairy tale knight. That’s bad. That’s very, very bad.

Sam Spade: I think he ruins this by trying to extort Lord Summerisle for blackmail money and Summerisle just kills him and needs to find a new detective to trap. Either that, or he gets away with it because he absolutely sleeps with Willow.

Poirot: This trip is the single most miserable experience of Poirot’s life. Even more so than the nudity, he knows he has plunged into hell upon eating the terrible food and finding they don’t even have any of their famous apples! In fact, I like the idea that it’s their famous food that first leads him in the direction of the answer; the harvest was bad, the book suggests they might have made a sacrifice, but they’ve had girls pose by those crops every year without anything bad happening to them. If the girls aren’t the sacrifice, who is? Willow’s attempted seduction certainly upsets him (David Suchet says he played him as asexual, but even if that’s not your interpretation, naked youths pounding on his door are the last thing he wants!) I don’t know if he can escape, but I think he can pull the right threads to figure things out and ruin the event.

Miss Marple: Boy, does Lord Summerisle feel like an asshole about this! Miss Marple does her best not to judge anyone for so much nudity- these young people today do insist on being modern, she just hopes they don’t catch cold. I think she’d really frustrate the islanders by not seeming to actually do her role. She’s not breaking down doors and demanding answers, and when Willow sings at her door she just chats about how nice it is that youngsters are interested in traditional folk music, seeming not to even get the test. What they don’t know is that Miss Marple is very, very good at listening and observing. She knows. And she’s going to play the part of the dotty old lady right up until the very point when she can get back on that plane.

Kinsey Milhone: Kinsey may be in trouble here. Innocent young people being put in danger, especially when she could have saved them, is the sort of thing that drives her courage but could also propel her blindly into her doom. If things don’t go exactly as they did in the movie, it will be because she focuses on a different question- who sent her that letter? Everyone acts like they know what’s going on, so who “didn’t know” where Rowan was and was “afraid something terrible had happened”? The bigger the conspiracy looks, the less likely it is that anyone could have been ignorant or even sent a secret letter, and that might let Kinsey realize it was sent on purpose.