#(This was about lingerie but I ended up ranting about clothes in general apparently...)

[t0rschlusspan1k]

I just want some cute lingerie, is that too much to ask?

[thearcaneescape]

Chapter 1

It was a long time coming, but breaking up with Joshua was the most cathartic experience in Hoseok’s life. Granted he’d gone to cloud nine when he got his dream job, but this was a feeling of absolute content. What he wasn’t expecting, however, was finding himself in a gay club in Soho called The Arcane Escape.

“First time here?”

Hoseok jumped at the voice that came from behind the bar. The club was oddly muted, a very 1940’s aesthetic in place. The bartender was no older than 21, with a strong jaw and nose, dark brows visible with his slicked-back hair, a single strand curling coquettishly on his forehead. Like Superman.

“Ah, yeah. Just got out of a dead-end relationship and some friends told me this club was cool.” He looked around once more, eyes falling on one of the waiters (waitresses?). “It’s a cool concept for a gay club.”

The bartender chuckled, making Hoseok turn around to catch a glimpse of the young man’s bunny teeth. “Yeah, you can thank Sugar for that one. She owns the club.”

“You didn’t tell me we had new patrons in, Jungkook!” A soothingly nasal voice floated over to where Hoseok and the bartender (Jungkook, as Hoseok now knew) were. A tall queen with long black hair in a shoulder-length, wavy bob, plush ruby lips and broad shoulders sauntered over, wearing a red backless dress with little ruffled sleeves that covered her shoulders, a white feather boa draped in her arms.

“That’s cuz he just got here, Jeannie.” Jungkook raised an eyebrow at her, a smirk playing on his thin lips. “Interesting choice of outfit. Not performing tonight?”

Jeannie shrugged gracefully, ruby lips pouted and eyelids fluttering closed. “Gigi wasn’t here last week, as you know, so I gave her my shows for the week. I gotta say, she looks lovely in her choice of corsetry tonight.” When Jungkook cleared his throat and muttered something about getting another bottle of Jack, she blew a kiss at him and then turned her attention to Hoseok, who blushed red in turn. “Now, what’s your name, darling?”

“Hoseok.” He blurted out, feeling his face burn red. Jeannie smiled, gently, cooing softly at his blushing.

“It’s nice to meet you, Hoseok.”

Hoseok quickly found out quite a bit about Jeannie. His real name was Seokjin, and during the day he worked at a cafe near the bar, a well-known place called L’Eto. Hoseok also learned that he got his name from I Dream of Jeannie, because it sounded enough like his nickname and also because he loved the pun on the word “genie”. Apparently he loved puns in general. (“I couldn’t love them in captain, it’s not a high enough rank!”)

Suddenly the lights dimmed and a tall queen, taller than Jeannie, walked onstage, wearing a gloriously pink silk robe, pink heels and a long wavy blonde wig. She had the true definition of bedroom eyes, with glossy pink lips and smokey eyeshadow.

“Good evening, ladies, gentlemen and all those in between or outside the norm. My name is Sugar, and as always, I am thrilled to have you here at my establishment. The cabaret will begin shortly, and I hope you all have a lovely time.” She winked at the crowd with a thick falsie and sauntered offstage.

The first few queens were quietly insulted by Jeannie as their acts went by, ranging from “absolute bitch” to “she didn’t laugh at my joke the other day”. When a shorter, curvier queen got on stage, however, the beauty sitting next to Hoseok at the table he’d guided him to slapped his arm in excitement.

“That’s Gigi! She’s in a relationship with Victoria.”

Gigi was an absolute beauty, softer and more delicate than Jeannie, but she had an aura of raw sensuality about her, even with her angelic face. Full, dark burgundy lips, similar to Jeannie’s but poutier, sleepy eyes and golden skin, the pink wig on her head carefully styled in tight waves pinned back with delicate hair pins with glittering pink crystals and pearls like a 1920’s flapper. The robe she was wearing was reminiscent of what Sugar had walked onstage with, but much more sheer, giving a glimpse of the glittering pink bustier, corset and panties she was wearing. She started dancing, sending small winks and smiles at the audience, walking up and down the stage as she lip-synced to Marilyn Monroe’s Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend, but the voice was just a bit different to what Hoseok thought Marilyn Monroe sounded like.

“Oh, Gigi and I are two of the only three queens who sing live. Victoria does a great Mae West impression as well.” Jeannie piped up, catching Hoseok’s small frown. When he turned to look at him with an astounded look on his face, the drag queen laughed, a sound not unlike a windshield wiper. “You look equal parts surprised and offended. Victoria always goes after Gigi, so you’ll see what I mean.”

During that short conversation, Gigi had shed her robe, and the crystal-studded lingerie glittered in the lights that shone onstage, dainty fingers grazing over stockinged thighs, the edge of the thigh-highs digging into the flesh of her thick and powerful legs. The robe had also been covering the odd skirt that connected to the corset, like a midi skirt but without a front, exposing the panties she had on but covering her butt. It swayed from side to side, giving a sneak peek at the backside that went with powerful thighs. Small hands picked at the corset slowly as the song reached its end, and the corset was pulled off, showing the panties and the silk garter keeping the stockings up, and when Gigi turned around to finish the song with a wink over her shoulder, Hoseok’s face burned red. The clapping was uproarious, and the mic taped to Gigi’s chest caught her giggles and the breathy thank you before she skipped offstage. Jeannie was laughing and he motioned for Hoseok to turn around and look at Jungkook, who was burning red. The lights dimmed and a low sultry beat started, deep bass and drums, a snapping of fingers before the lights turned on, tinted red and sensual. The queen standing onstage was tall and willowy, like an Alphonse Mucha painting in a floor-length see-through gown covered with glittering red and black crystals, various pieces of jewellery dripping from her neck and arms, a red crystal and gold diadem in her delicately curled blonde wig. The crystals that gathered at the chest fell over and narrowed into a long winding snake that very much resembled the Gucci snake and covered her crotch. She looked expensive and refined, like a fine wine that was only opened for royalty. And then she started singing.

“Holy shit.” Hoseok felt chills go down his spine as Victoria sang her own rendition of Peggy Lee’s Fever. Her voice was beautifully deep, sultry and smooth, and Hoseok could just melt into it.

“Isn’t she great?” Jeannie was smiling proudly, leaning his chin delicately on his hand, taking care not to smudge his foundation. As if sensing Jeannie’s praise, Victoria chuckled and smiled proudly at the audience during a break in the song. It was a boxy smile, not entirely unattractive, but charming in a different way to her aura as she sang.

At that moment, Jeannie turned to look at Hoseok. “I know she smiles like fucking Valentina, but she’s much nicer I swear.”

“I’m sorry, but I have no idea who that is.” Hoseok frowned in confusion, trying to rake his mind through all the names Jeannie had mentioned in his ramblings.

“Oh, she doesn’t work here. She was in RuPaul’s Drag Race, and she just rubbed me the wrong way. Victoria doesn’t appreciate that people tell her her smile is like that little bitch’s smile.” Jeannie whispered conspiratorially at Hoseok, but then sighed when he spotted someone approaching the table. “Aaah, they heard me. I love them, but sometimes…”

“Who’s “they”?” Hoseok asked, but his question was quickly answered when a tall young person with purple hair slicked back into a tight ponytail, wavy tresses cascading down their back slid into the seat next to Jeannie.

“No, Joon.”

The young person opened their mouth and then closed it, pouting slightly. “Why?”

“Because I heard you rant about this this morning. I am not letting you subject a potential friend to your political rants so early in the relationship.”

“Joon” crossed their arms over their chest, pursing thick lips in thought. Hoseok could feel a sense of domesticity between “Joon” and Jeannie, warm and loving.

“So, Joon, this is Hoseok. Hoseok, this is my amazingly smart, yet loose-lipped, partner, Joon.” Jeannie motioned gracefully between each of the other occupants sitting either side of him.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Joon’s voice was deep, comforting in a different way to Victoria’s, and the smile that they gave Hoseok was warm and dimpled.

“Yeah, same.” Hoseok grinned, bright and genuine, the last few notes of the song dying off as Victoria walked offstage, mic in hand and still singing. Joon stood up, tugging on their tie, a grey and black striped number that went well with the pinstripe vest and trousers. They looked like a very progressive mobster.

“I’m gonna get changed. It’s almost closing time.”

Jeannie nodded, stretching his arms in front of himself before standing up as well. Joon gave him a kiss on the cheek before they made their way behind the bar.

“Do you want to go meet the other queens?”

Most of the other queens had already left, leaving Victoria and Gigi gossiping and wiping off their makeup alone. Jeannie threw open the door to the backstage dramatically, also throwing the feather boa onto one of the chairs nearby.

“I bring a new potential friend!” He sang out, pulling out the pin that held the wig’s bangs in place.

“Oooh!” Gigi shot up from her seat, pink wig still styled in the same delicate finger waves, all the pins removed from it. Victoria had lost her wig, grey-brown hair tousled and feathery. Hoseok raised his hand in greeting as Jeannie disappeared behind a screen, the sound of a zipper and then a soft groan of relief floating out from behind it. Victoria and Gigi were out of their clothes, the bedazzled items hanging on their respective mannequins.

“Hi! I’m Jimin.” Gigi, or Jimin, outstretched his hand, fake nails now easily discernible. They were the same shade of pink as the lingerie set, almond-shaped and studded with rhinestones. Hoseok shook his small hand gently, trying hard not to coo at how cute they were.

“I’m Hoseok. It’s nice to meet you. Your set was one of my favourites.”

Jimin giggled, a faint blush appearing on his round cheeks. Victoria also stepped forwards, giving Hoseok a more adorable version of the boxy smile he’d seen before.

“I’m Taehyung.” He also outstretched a hand, and Hoseok also took note of the difference in styles as he shook it. Taehyung’s hands were large, with slender fingers and painted-red fingernails that matched the dress.

“Oh, man, your set was absolutely stunning, man.” Hoseok blurted out, excitement running through his body. “Everything just went together so well, and your dress is unbelievable.”

Taehyung chuckled, his nose scrunching up as he smiled and did a little happy dance. “Thank you so much! Me and Jimin make all of our outfits, so that’s high praise.”

Hoseok would’ve choked on his spit if Joon hadn’t walked in and patted him on the back.

“Jin, are you ready?”

“I just need to clean my face and then I’ll be done!” Seokjin’s voice came out from behind the screen and the man himself soon followed, pitch-black hair free of the wig. He was wearing a pink hoodie and black jeans, the hoodie's sleeves falling past his fingers.

“Oh! Thanks for giving me the shows, Jinnie. Uni was just hell last week.” Jimin said, carding a comb through his hair, which wasn’t a wig like Hoseok thought. The thin-toothed comb scraped through the layers of gel needed to keep the finger waves intact. “To be perfectly honest,” He grunted when the comb caught on a piece of gelled hair. “I would much rather rip my hair out doing this than write a 10,000 word essay for a class I fucking hate.”

“I hear ya.” Joon muttered, walking past Hoseok to help Jin pack up. The suit was gone, replaced by a knee-length black skirt and a grey shirt, purple hair loose from the hairband and falling to the left of their face. They had black knee socks on and ratty-looking black trainers on their feet. “I miss the essays, though.”

“Can you write my dissertation, then?” Taehyung piped up, a mischievous smile on his face. Hoseok laughed with Jimin and Joon when Jin mock-gasped and went on a short spiel about how even though his partner had a genius-level IQ they couldn’t use them for writing dissertations.

“You’re a fashion student, Tae. Joon was a music student.” Jimin piped up, hair finally free from most of the gel, some parts frizzy and fluffy. He tugged on a beanie to keep his hair hidden and rested his chin on the taller man’s shoulder, having to stand on his tiptoes to reach it. “I can help you with your essay.”

“You don’t know anything about fashion history, though.” Tae muttered as he grabbed Jimin’s arms and brought them to wrap around his waist, making him giggle. “It’s like me helping you with your dance routine.”

Hoseok perked up at that, turning his eyes towards the other couple. “You’re a dancer?”

Jimin nodded, pouting cutely. “Yeah. I need a partner for this project but all of the other people in my course have already grouped up.”

“I work in a dance studio. Do you have to work with a classmate?”

Jimin shook his head, eyes turning into crescents when he smiled. “Nope! When do you want to meet?”

“My schedule is Wednesdays and Fridays from 1pm to 3pm. Anytime after that would be great. Jay lets me stay in my area of the studio after hours.”

With a squeal, Jimin untangled himself from Taehyung and bounced over to Hoseok, pulling out his phone. “Here, put in your number and I’ll text you when I can go to the studio.”

Hoseok started typing in his number when another presence made itself known. Jungkook barreled in, out of his spiffy suit and in all black, a skin-tight black turtleneck under a black leather jacket, black jeans cinched tight around his tiny waist with a black belt, a few rips and tears in the fabric showing strips of light brown skin and the dips of powerful muscles. On his feet were well-worn black Timberlands, some of the leather scratched grey and faded.

“Anyone need a ride home?” He had a backpack hanging loosely from his hand, looking like a goddamn model and making Hoseok pause as he typed the last digits of his number.

“Me and Joon are going to dinner, and we live like two blocks down from here.” Jin finished swiping some moisturiser under his eyes, and then leaned down to grab his own bag from underneath his station.

“We’re taking the Tube. I don’t trust you driving.” Taehyung wrapped his arms around Jimin and picked him up, making him squeal. Hoseok jerked himself out of his handsome-man-induced stupor and finished typing in his number before handing Jimin back his phone.

“How about you drive Hoseok to his place? You’re the only one he hasn’t talked to properly.” Joon finished clumping up their hair into a messy bun, piercing-covered ears on show. “Don’t be shy, Kook.”

Hoseok gave Jungkook a tentative smile and the younger shrugged, smiling wide and bright, again giving Hoseok a look at those adorable bunny teeth. There was some shyness there, but there was also something that seemed like a desire to impress.

“Alright then.” He lugged the backpack up to his shoulder, walking out of the dressing room in two long strides.

“Ah, Hoseok, before you go, let me give you my number if you ever want to come over to my and Joon’s place for a meal.” Jin rattled off a series of numbers to Hoseok, who typed them down quick and easy.

“It was great meeting all of you!” Hoseok waved his goodbye with a big grin and ran after Jungkook. He’d forgotten how much he liked making new friends.