#(and being estranged from your own mother would certainly help hammer that home.... pun intended.)

[magnusmodig]

╰┈➤ VI TALKS ABOUT THOR/MCU / anon / no longer accepting !

🔥 ( Thor and his relationship with Frigga )

||. Oh, man, Thor/Frigga is an interesting topic - because I feel the thor/mcu fandom tends to really characterize her one of two ways, and both are right and both are wrong.

The FIRST WAY is that "Frigga is a saint who can do no wrong, absolutely adores both of her boys and is the perfect mother" and... while I think that Frigga is certainly a perfectly loving and caring mother (and person tbh.) she very clearly had her FAVORITE son. There's a huge element of neglect towards Thor that goes overlooked in this take that I don't agree with, even if I don't subscribe to the idea that Frigga was purposefully neglectful, either.

....Which happens to be the SECOND WAY that the fandom (mostly the mcu!loki fandom, as usual) mischaracterizes Frigga, and by proxy Thor/Frigga's bond as well. In this take, they make Frigga's favoritism and doting over Loki go too far. To the point where she's passive-aggressive and borderline toxic, just because Thor isn't her precious uwu frost-baby. I am a FIRM believer that even if Loki was her favored son to hang out with, Frigga still didn't love Thor any less. It's just a very complex relationship, overall.

My personal take on Frigga is as follows:

Ultimately: Thor is her son! Her only child! And so is Loki, and I think she loved them BOTH so dearly. At the end of the day though, Thor has to spend his time with the other aesir in the family, and that's not Frigga, it's Odin. Not only that, but Frigga has more in common with Loki, so they have more to talk about in 1:1 moments together. What I think this led to was an unfortunate cycle in which she spent so much energy doting over Loki, making sure he felt seen/heard and had "some sun for himself" that she COMPLETELY neglected to see that her other son was in just as much pain as the youngest was; that while Loki is the underdog, Thor still needed his mother, and DID NOT have it all together. She was completely fooled by Thor's façade just like everyone else. And only realized how estranged they had become when it was too late, and she couldn't reach Thor anymore. (She also died before she could make it right.)

To further explain these two opposing takes, the first characterization comes (presumably) from the following:

Frigga being a very wise and clearly empathetic individual. The "glue" that keeps the family together. (a general observation due to how she interacts with her family. specifically: "[Odin] kept the truth [about you being a frost giant] from you so that you would never feel different. You are our son, Loki, and we your family. You must know that." thor (2011), and immediately accepting jane as her daughter-in-law in Thor: Dark World comes to mind. )

Frigga arguing with Odin about Thor's banishment (deleted scene.)

Frigga (attempting) to assuage Thor's anxiety pre!coronation (deleted scene)

I think this particular take is relatively accurate in characterizing Frigga's motherly nature, yes. But what it neglects to keep in mind is that:

Frigga was complicit in the lie of Loki's heritage. Her line about "Odin" not wanting Loki to feel different can also be read as her using Odin as a bit of straw-man for her own feelings. (@mischiefmodig and I have actually come to the conclusion "not wanting loki to feel different" was originally HER idea when Loki was very small. Odin is too pragmatic to come up with it. BUT when he got older, Frigga changed her mind, and Odin didn't want to tell Loki at that point because it'd cause a meltdown. Which it did.)

Frigga arguing for Thor's sake post!banishment was NOT done while Thor was aware of this development. HE IS NOT AWARE THAT THIS HAPPENED. From his perspective, she never fought for him, and more importantly: even if he did find out AFTER the fact, during his banishment, THOR DIDN'T EXPECT HER TO. In fact, Thor accepts that Frigga disowned him the second Loki lies to his face about that detail in THOR. (Re: "Mother has forbidden your return.") It makes no sense for Thor to believe this so immediately if they were close. (he WAS close to Loki, who he trusts implicitly, especially because he's family.)

While Frigga does attempt to assuage Thor's anxiety before the coronation, the key word here is ATTEMPT. She doesn't succeed. It's actually staggering how badly she misses the mark, and he continues to be largely unfocused and anxious about it. Even though Loki's scene with Thor happened before Frigga's, it was Loki who was able to say what needed to be said to calm Thor down where Frigga couldn't. ("You're my brother, and my friend [...] never doubt that I love you." / T: "How do I look?" L: "Like a king.")

The second take comes from a very loud and large portion of the loki!fandom in particular who absolutely despises Thor as a character and prefer Loki in every way. To the point where, I suppose, Thor is "an abusive brother"... Which makes no sense. It's ultimately a lot of projection. HOWEVER, I can't say it's entirely inaccurate to the favoritism displayed either. Some things I can say Frigga messed up on are as follows:

The official marvel comic (taking place between thor 2011 and avengers) in which Frigga endlessly searches for Loki and refuses to believe he's dead instead of mourning his loss with her husband and son. (Which is saying a lot, given that Thor and Odin both saw Loki attempt suicide by letting go into a black hole.) While she was right in the end, this is ... really negligent at the end of the day. (it puts SUCH a bad taste in my mouth that I refuse to consider it canon since it's not the movie's material anyways. I do think she searched for Loki, but more that she was searching for his body so they could have SOMETHING to bury.)

This scene of Frigga telling Thor that "[he] and your father cast large shadows"... Which is true and not necessarily a bad thing to say, but the line that preceded this was ultimately Thor just asking Frigga if she regrets teaching Loki her magic because of all the trouble (and war crimes) he’s committed with it…. And her answer was no —> proceeds to remind thor that he overshadowed Loki. (I don't think he took that personally or was bothered by it, but the answer isn't exactly well-timed or considerate of ... everything.)

TL;DR: Thor and Frigga aren't close. They're "close enough", but the fact that he doesn't shed tears at her funeral, (he weeps for loki THREE TIMES and is utterly enraged by Odin's death. Hers is the ONLY death thor is witness to where he does not actively react to at all.), speaks of her as if he's speaking highly of a well-esteemed stranger, has no reaction to her attempts to meet his emotional needs, responds minimally to her physical affections (mostly talking about body language, he's very stiff with her in a safe environment vs. a battle environment, as shown respectively), actively shuts her out in a time of mourning (she has to ask sif how her OWN SON is doing post!loki's death), and fully believed that she would not have fought for his right to return home —and in fact, FORBADE IT — with no questioning shows me as much, even if they do have some very soft moments together.