#(oh yes EVERYONE thinks I have an accent! and many of them attempt to replicate it badly in text!)

[nostalgia-tblr]

I feel like anyone who's about to embark on attempting to type out a character's accent phoentically (at least as well as one can with English) should probably stop for a moment before they get going and ask themselves, "How would I, myself, feel about a fic where the one character who sounds like me had their speech written out like this and every other character just got their dialogue left in standard spelling?" I feel like a lot of people would tone it down a bit, at least, if they'd done that thought experiment first.

(Anyone who answered "but I don't have an accent!" isn't allowed to write out anyone else's accent, ever. This rule may seem harsh but you need it. Really, you do. Because you've never had anyone treat your accent as abnormal or comical or wrong, so you really don't know what you're inflicting on others here.)

[ask-whitepearl-and-steven]

Hey so on the topic of linguistics.. Do you know where accents come from? It's something I've wondered for a while but when I research I get vague or unsure answers.. I find it fascinating how places like America have accents from different states.

b O I 

This is gonna be a long one folks, strap in. I apologize in advance. 

Okay, first things first - I’m gonna clear up some misconceptions right off the bat. Things you need to know about accents: 

1) EVERYONE has an accent. 

An accent is not a topping on a pancake of ‘normal’ language. There is no such thing as a ‘normal’ way of talking. Some languages have something they consider a ‘standard accent’ but the only thing that changes its status is the fact that it’s spoken by the majority who have some sort of social/economic power. 

 2) Language changes like ALL the fuckin’ time. 

We are used to hearing about ‘language’ and ‘grammar’ as if it’s something that’s like an observable phenomenon, like light or mass - and we MUST adhere to its rules. You might think there’s some stuffy old white guy in a building somewhere making up the most ‘logical’ rules of language and then passing out grammar books yearly. 

But in fact, that’s not what it’s like at all. Language is organic and is constantly evolving into its new form. The English of today is not the same as the English of 100 years ago. Even tried reading Shakespeare in school? Found it hard, did ya? Now try reading English from 800 CE! 

We have a pretty interesting way to track this because texts that have attempted to remain largely the same but keep on updating - like the bible - show this progression rather well.

Why is this, you ask? Well, mostly because languages tend to change according to the needs of their speakers. And English - English is a bit of a bastard. English has been pickpocketing other languages for their vocabulary and grammar for YEARS! How?

Colonialism, for a start, but also natural stuff like traveling - trading - cultural interest. 

So picture this: You’re a simple peasant living a simple life trying to avoid dying of dysentery on the oregon trail. 

You travel up the river to visit your cousin Bob and stay with his family in a different country. Bob has been living in that country for a while so now he speaks the local language. You start to work with him at his local business. One day you pick up a cool new tool you’ve never seen and go “wazzis?” and Bob goes “Oh we call that a Gigbblegook.” And you go “oh that’s fantastic, we’ve been needin’ one of them” and so you go back down the river and start a business selling Gigglegooks. And everyone loves it, and BAM! You’ve just introduced a new word to your own language. (Except of course, you’ve been pronouncing it wrong on account of the fact that you’re not a native speaker. So it’s more of a… Gibbygoo. Whatever. Close enough. Serves its purpose, eh?) 

Now repeat that with 20,000 different people across 2000 different towns and about 50 different countries. Set the mixer on High. Don’t rinse. Repeat. 

Now, you might be wondering - what does that have to do with accents?

It’s a similar concept, you see. Accents evolve with their languages. They evolve with the needs of people. So for example, the American accents evolved based on the needs of its settlers. America is a large country, colonized by all kinds of different people from all over Europe. All of them had their own way of speaking - because their native languages were all different!

You see, not all languages are the same in terms of sound. Yes, we’re all human, and we can all make approximately the same sounds with our mouth as the guy next to us except - no, we can’t! In fact, based on the language we’ve taught from birth to about 13-ish years old, our brain basically decides which mouth-sounds we need to focus on saying and which mouth-sounds aren’t ever gonna be relevant. This is why many americans can’t roll their Rs or can’t recreate the specific sounds necessary to speak, say, Hindi. 

Conversely, many people who came to America weren’t able to perfectly replicate Queen’s English. Their communities were large enough and influential enough to sway the general way of speaking English into one accent or another.

Of course, this isn’t the ONLY way accents develop. Some accents come from many different places - sometimes someone just start saying weird stuff and it becomes a whole THING. We’re social creatures, and speaking conventions are quite easy to spread. 

Anyway, the short answer is: ACCENTS COME FROM PEOPLE. Usually they are people from different places. 

If you want to learn more, here’s a video!

[ladyideal]

Piece of Cake

Pairing: McKirk x Reader

Word Count: 2335

Requested by: @cuddlememerrick​ “Alright so idea since you said you need some! Mckirk/reader one of them has been having a bad week and the other two plan  a relaxing night for them, cook their favorite meal, ready their favorite movies etc. Just need some fluff with my two boys.”

Warnings: Cursing (still), mention of explosions and sickness, mostly fluff really

Summary: An explosion happens down in Engineering. You almost cry as your day off disappears into a week of hell and fixing up the ship. Worried, Jim and Leonard convinces threatens you to take the day off after several days have past since the accident. At the end, you spent your night with your two best boyfriends.

A/n: so yay first request. I’ll probably just keep requests open for an indefinite time and finish them slowly. Also giving McKirk x reader some good lovin at 4am. I should get to bed. 

(credit gif to owner)

Placing you comm on your nightstand, you snuggled under the covers. It was only 10 at night, but Scotty had let you go early. There weren't many work orders, and the ensigns could cover what was left on the list. You weren’t going to say no at the prospect of leaving work early, especially when you finally had a day off the next day. 

Some of the Engineers were off sick, but you and Scotty still made it work. As Scotty’s unofficial second, you covered Beta and the occasional Gamma shift, but you were proud of how far you’ve come. In just two years abroad the Enterprise, you’d not only make it to Lieutenant Commander, but somehow had two loving boyfriends and a wonderful job on the flagship of the fleet. You had the dream of what many yearned for.

You knew that both Len and Jim were still at their offices, finishing up their reports. Granted you had your fair share of reports to catch up on, but for now, you could care less. You’d thought of waiting up for them, but you’d figured you could get some early shut eye. Hopefully now, Jim could stop complaining about your lack of sleep. A day off was a day off. On that note, you drifted off into a nap.

Chirp.

Chirp.

You groaned, reluctantly sticking your hand out from under the covers to blindly search around for your comm. Once finding it, you flipped it open.

“Y/L/N,” You slurred groggily, eyeing blearily at the chrom.

It was midnight.

Dammit. 

“Lassie! Where are you?” Scotty’s voice answered. The urgency and panic in his voice instantly raised your concern, and you grudgingly sat up. 

“Scotty, I’m in bed. What happened?”

“Lass, are ya dead to the world? Ensign Reol snapped the wrong wire, the consoles blew, and the right turbine is in pieces. I cannae get this done myself. Get down here.”

“Shit,” you cursed, scrambling out of bed. “I’m on my way.”

Swiftly, you put on your uniform and tied your boots up. In a last attempt to make yourself decent for work, you threw your hair into a messy ponytail. Without another glance, you hurriedly grabbed your kit and comm, and rushed out of the door. 

You hurried into a turbolift, forcefully keying in your destination. As you waited, you tapped your foot while sorting through your kit full of tools. You’d gotten only two hours of sleep, and you were already back to work again. Grabbing your comm out, you blinked your eyes at the amount of messages you received.

Thirty messages from three panicking people. Jim, Len, and Scotty, of course.

You skimmed through them, noticing that Jim’s last message was a threat saying that if you didn’t reply back on your whereabouts, he was going to send a search party. That message was sent ten minutes ago. With a frown, you sent both Len and the Captain saying that you were fine, and on the way down to Engineering to see what was going on.

Almost immediately, both replied.

“For god’s sake, you red shirts just love danger.” - L

“No search party this time, Y/N.” - J

You grinned, but clipped your comm back. When the doors open, you hurried out.

“What the hell,” You slid beside to Scotty’s side, watching the billows of inky jet black smoke obscuring the rest of the engine room. There were pieces of shrapnel littering the ground in front, and plenty of black soot to go around. An unpleasant smell of burnt plastic wafted up from the lower levels to the top. If you squinted your eyes hard enough, you could make out the charred remains of what was left of several consoles laying couple yards away. 

“Turbine flew off when the consoles blew, lass,” Scotty pointed. “Had to manually drop her out of warp.”

“Everyone okay?” You rubbed your eyes tiredly with the back of your hand. “It looks pretty bad.”

You knew from past experiences that Leonard was going to have yet another fit towards the incompetence of engineers. At least this time, you weren’t the one hurt. 

“I’m afraid not, lassie,” Scotty grimaced. “Medical got them out after the sprinklers started.”

“Who’s left?”

“Not many.”

You glanced at him, and turned back to the chaos in front of you. Squeezing your eyes shut briefly, you pinched the bridge of your nose. This could not be happening right now, right on the eve of your day off. You let out a resigned sigh, and opened your eyes again. 

“I go take a look at the wires, and you go see what’s left of that right turbine?” You suggested, looking over at your superior grimly.

“Aye, lass.”

Unfortunately, that was how your week started. It was going to be one long horrible week for sure. 

With a good portion of your engineers injured or still sick, you and Scotty were spread thin across all three shifts. Leaving you with no other choice, each day you spent working with the Chief Engineer on the Beta and Gamma shift. You directed the other Engineers to leave the non immediate work orders for later, and to jimmy together what was left of the consoles in order for the ship to be able to reach the next Federation outpost.

You waved to Scotty on your way down from the stairs to sign in, which he only acknowledged with a nod from up above. Sixteen hour work days were starting to take a toll on your already exhausted mind and body. However, you had a feeling that Scotty didn’t get too sleep much either.

Hell, at this rate you could probably twine wires and solder them together in your sleep now.

Both Jim and Leonard had both tried to get to you to get more sleep, but you shook them off, saying that there weren’t enough hands to fix the damn ship. The latter had already threatened his usual medical leave on you, but this time you’d thanked him and shook your head. The Captain didn’t dare try forcing you to take a day off. He knew better, as eventually you would just sneak back to Engineering and continue working.

“Bones, have you seen Y/N at all this week?” Jim frowned into his glass of bourbon. 

“Only when Y/N and I passed by in our room. Y/N went to sleep, and I went in for Alpha,” Leonard didn’t bother looking up from his PADD, doing his best to ignore the blonde putting his feet up on the armrest. “Feet off the furniture, Jim.”

Jim pouted, but pressed on. “Do you think we should cheer Y/N up? You cook dinner, and I’ll find some holos to watch? You know that Y/N loves it when you cook. No replicator can do your cooking justice.”

The doctor grunted, eyeing his captain as though he was weighing the odds of cheering you up with his food. “If you find another musical, Jim, I swear I’ll put you in for another physical.”

~

“Afternoon, Scotty,” You shouted, half as a greeting and the other half as a homing beacon. You could never really know where the Chief Engineer could be lurking around at any given time. He was almost everywhere, and nowhere at the same time. 

“Afternoon, Y/N,” Your superior called tiredly from above, hanging from a rope to fix the tubes. “What number are ya on?”

“Six,” You answered, sipping your coffee as you signed in with one hand. It was your sixth back to back Beta and Gamma shifts, and you were really feeling the exhaustion creeping in. 

“Six?! For god’s sake, you shoulda take a break, lass,” Scotty continued. “Ya know that, McCoy ain’t happy with me keeping you here all day long.”

You snorted loudly, sifting through the work orders. As many were still down in Medbay, you had taken up a couple of ensign jobs to help lighten up the load. “He will live. Where do you need me?”

It was three hours in when your communicator buzzed.

Setting your screwdriver on a nearby Jefferies tube, you flipped it open.

“Y/L/N.”

“Y/N. Jim and I are worried about you, sweetheart. You can use the break, and come eat with us over dinner. Jim has a surprise for you,” Leonard’s voice came through.

“Len, I appreciate it, but right now-,” You paused, swearing when your screwdriver teetered and fell. “Scotty, be nice and throw me your wrench? I can’t seem to find mine.”

“Throwing wrenches?” Came a now very concerned doctor. “Why the hell are you throwing wrenches around?”

“Aye, swing over and I’ll hand it over.”

You pushed off from the tube that you were stationed above and gently swung down to meet Scotty. 

“Y/N , why do I hear wind? Are you above the Jefferies again?” Leonard continued. “Dammit women, what did I say about going up there?”

“That I’ll one day fall to my death,” You smirked, thanking Scotty with a nod.

“I’m coming down there to fetch you,” The doctor decided for you. “Don’t get into anymore trouble.”

“No promises, love.”

Regardless, you continued working. Oh no, you couldn’t leave Scotty here on his own to fix the rest of the damage from the earlier blast. With the amount of work still to be done, there was no way you would be retiring for the night. 

“Y/N, did you even hear a word of what I just said?” A familiar southern accent drew your attention from down below you.

“Yes, but-.”

“ Sweetheart, you’re exhausted. Both Scotty and Jim have said it was alright for you to take the rest of the day off.” 

Despite the earlier protest that you were fine, you yawned. It was true that the lack of sleep and food and even water was getting to you. Occasionally, you’d caught yourself nodding off. If it weren’t for the fact that you were safely suspended on a length of rope, you’d probably fall and hit your head on the way down. 

“I’m fine, Len. Just save me some food?” You ventured a glance downward in time to watch his brows furrow.

“Don’t make me do it, darlin’. Jim and I are just looking out for you.You can’t be a good engineer if you keep messing up, and dropping things. You’re tired, let us take care of you.”

‘It’ was the medical leave. Leonard had threatened the usage earlier, but you didn’t, as per usual, paid any attention. 

“Get some sleep, lass,” Scotty’s voice carried from a couple yards away. “I’ll see ya tomorrow.”

With three people up your ass, you finally relented. 

“Fine, fine,” You grumbled reluctantly, sticking the rest of your tools into your kit, and slowly lowering yourself back down onto solid ground. 

When your feet made contact with the floor, you unbuckled yourself from the rope, and turned to Leonard.

“Happy now?” You huffed out, wobbling unsteadily towards him.

“Getting there,” The doctor responded, enveloping you in a hug and placing a light kiss on your lips. “I’ve cooked us some dinner, Jim has a surprise, and then we can snuggle up together on the couch. What do you say to that?”

You hummed in content, kissing him back as your eyes closed. With the promise of more concerted kisses, you were looking forward to the dinner. “I would like that. It would make up for the hell that was this week.”

“JESUS, MARY, AND JOSEPH. WILL YA TWO FIND ANOTHER PLACE TO KISS!?” A very irritated sounding Scotty shouted from above. 

“We should leave, sweetheart,” Leonard grinned, his trademark smirk back again. You nodded in agreement.

“PLEASE!”

With a chuckle, the two of you made your way back towards your quarters.

After some homemade fried chicken, green beans, and a generous heaping of mashed potatoes and gravy, you had to grudgingly admit that Leonard was right in coercing you to take a break. The food and the company really brightened your spirits up after a long hell of a week. 

“You were right, Leonard. The food was what I really needed,” You leaned back into your chair.

“That’s not all!” Jim hurried out of his chair, almost knocking the poor thing over in his hurry to reach the kitchen.

You glanced over at the doctor for some context, but only received a shrug in return. You deduced that this was going to be Jim’s surprise.

“Ta da da da,” Jim emerged back with a cake in his hands. 

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. Jim wasn’t a baker after all.

“How did you-?” You couldn’t find the words to finish your question.

“I might have had some help in taste testing and baking it,” Jim replied with a sheepish grin. 

You laughed, appreciating the work from both your boyfriends. “Thank you.”

“Come, darlin’” Leonard stood up. “We can eat it while we watch some holos that Jim picked out for you. He also swore that there wouldn’t be any musicals.”

You beamed at both Jim and Leonard, and nodded.

While Jim went off in search of plates and forks, you and Leonard settled comfortably on the couch, leaving a space for Jim to later sit in. 

“Feet up,” The doctor requested, and you obliged with a grin.

“How about some Western? Nyota said this one was a classic,” Jim grabbed the remote as he sat on your left after planting an affectionate kiss on your cheek.

“Sure,” You smiled, purring happily on his shoulder as Leonard idly stroked your shins and ankles. With the holo on, Jim slightly maneuvered you around till your back was to him. You groaned out loud as he started massaging your shoulders, and kneading out the knots with expert hands. 

While the week might have been beyond hellish, you could always count on both Leonard and Jim to make even the worst of days better. For that, you were forever grateful for your two very loving boyfriends.

ST Tags: @mournthewicked​ (if you want to be tagged in future star trek fics, let me know)