#* // ♦︎ V1. — › YOUTH

[monogatcri]

“sometimes i feel like…like i really don’t belong here…like i’m supposed to be someplace else.”

━━ ˟ ⊰🍁THEIR MORNINGS ARE EARLY , rising by the sound of the bird song outside their windows and the sliver cresting of sun peeking through curtains. Passage of time within the village could vary, but this seemed a constant schedule inside the Niwa residence, whether the Kabukimono chose to stay with him or the others fell on his shoulders to decide, for none of them wished to dictate his path nor wish to instigate their own protective natures upon them. This was their ward, practically a child they all collectively adopted and promised to raise and care for...

        ...and yet when it came to moments like these, Niwa secretly wished he had the wiser nature of Mikoshi beneath his belt ; the man had enough experience to battle a lifetime of philosophies that the other simply smashed open the doors to and declared the first thought upon his mind. An exhale, his back facing shorter, the tea kettle warming over the fire, the leaves inside steeping as the water heated ; slow, arduous, painful -- it's understandable that these feelings applied to how long it took his mind to completely absorb and come up with an answer...

        ❝ I'm...not going to lie to you, ❞ he starts, head turning to face puppet. He can hear Katsuragi and Mikoshi judging his answer already, yet he doesn't feel the need to justify himself to them. Finger tip moved to the tea kettle, tempted to lift the lid to check process beneath. Bitter concoction would soon be done if he just allowed his mind to focus upon their conversation.

        His body now turned, feet carrying him to sit beside the other. Everyone had a purpose, but what did Kabukimono's purpose exist for? This reality is harsh, horrid, grabbing hold of his head and shoving it beneath the water to constantly face it each time he peered into a reflective surface and remembered he wasn't human among them (or maybe he always felt that way, Niwa couldn't be sure). ❝ Only you can answer this question... ❞ Such a concept left a sour taste upon tongue, for one so new to this world hardly would know what his fate is -- and the sheer responsibility of it shouldn't rest on him alone ; he doesn't allow him to fester on idea long, adding, gentleness still beating like heart within his chest: ❝ -- but what is your answer and what makes you question yourself? Let me help you find it -- we'll find that answer together, okay? ❞ He's one of them. He's Tatarasunan. Is there nothing that can eventually bring him to that answer? ❝ Let's start small: what makes you feel like you don't belong here? ❞

🍁 sentence starters  :  disney,  hercules,  part one.

[monogatcri]

" mr. niwa. mr. niwa? tsk... already dead. "

━━ ˟ ⊰🍁HAD THE FLOOR ALWAYS BEEN so cold to the touch or is this truly how it felt to pass away? Finger pads that rested against the wood of home iced over with slow abandon, readying corpse for its inevitable journey onward, bracing against reality that soon the concoction known as life would falter into oblivion. Words that were once so clear spewing from Escher's lips became a muffled hum that no longer registered to the young man's eardrums ; he spoke to someone -- perhaps himself -- but nothing made sense ... nothing made sense except ...

        thump ... thump ...

        Mikoshi Nagamasa ... Without Niwa by your side, would you still need Katsuragi to play mediator? There is no perspective that butts your head any longer, destined to make sure all your ideas come to fruition, yet there's nothing in Niwa's mind that causes him alarm -- no, he knows you'll do well... He knows Tatarasuna is in safe hands within your leadership. They need someone ; Niwa felt sorrow in knowing he'd be placing the burden of such a task upon your shoulders ; apologetic as he was, he hoped that you'd understand...

        thump ... ... thump ... ...

        Katsuragi ... You were always the one with the biggest heart, ready to defend, ready to help, ready to hold to your values and your principles. Between Niwa and Mikoshi's squabbling, there were moments that kept them sane by just your voice alone. Even when they were ready to duel with swords to establish a point, you were always there to talk it down and find middle ground ; now it's your job to take care of everyone, to keep sense within Nagamasa, to raise his son ...

        thump ... ... thump ... ...

        Hoshi ... Oh, sweet, Hoshi ; you'll grow up without a father, a trial that he'd never wanted you to experience. One of the hardest moments of his life had been deciding to enter the furnace to take responsibility for what had transpired. You were one of the ones that caused him to hesitate, fearful not of losing his life but bestowing a life without guidance from his hand to yours. He can only hope that you'll forgive him, that you'll grow up strong under the guidance of Nagamasa's strict teachings, of Katsuragi's kind nature, and ...

        thump ... ...

        Kabukimono ... Thank you for everything -- maybe you don't know how much you've done for Tatarasuna, maybe it's hard to know the weight of your influence when you've never known it to begin with ; however, the people within here -- especially Niwa -- are grateful to you. Every time you mentioned a heart, it tore Niwa in twain, wondering...just wondering...how you could not see that you already possessed one. Perhaps never physical, perhaps metaphorical meant nothing, but your heart existed and it beat louder than the whole of Inazuma's together. He's sorry. He's so sorry to you -- that he'll never be able to make you see the error of your mind and give you the peace it deserves...but...he hopes -- no, he prays to you that you'll take his heart from his chest and find comfort ... That once you have this within your chest, you'll ...

        thump ... ...

                you'll ...

                        thu ... ... ... mp ... ...

                                        you ...

                                                        thu ... ... ...

[monogatcri]

❝ If you do this return there , then you will die. ❞

━━ ˟ ⊰🍁RETURNING TO TATARASUNA AS SOON as possible meant that he'd have to leave this adventure behind him ; while his legs carried him along the blackened sands of shore, he hardly expected to witness his traveling companion there to see him off, having thought she was either asleep or out on a walk. The note left for her now felt a tad...redundant, but he digressed, sporting a genuine smile upon his face. To speak that she didn't unsettle him slightly would be a fib he couldn't pass off, but he didn't mind her company ; she wasn't outright attempting to harm him nor were their talks anything less than satisfyingly -- it was her presence upon this island. How she could survive so long here while others would have perished long ago.

        He busied himself with unfastening the rope that kept his raft afloat, the bobbing of waves calmer today than the time he'd managed to avoid crashing against the shores the first time ; he supposed it'd be easier to leave than to return -- a mental note that gave comfort unbound.

        ❝ If you return there , then you will die. ❞

        Head snapped up, eyes darting to meet her features ; it almost sounded equal to a threat, like she wanted to attack him to prevent him from leaving for just a second, but...the calm upon her countenance gave him pause as realization swarmed over him. He'll die in Tatarasuna soon? It's a slow burning ache that acted as anchor to his physical self here, unable to move, accepting the harsh splashing of salt water ravaging his body, mangling it and slicing him against the jagged stones.

        ❝ I...don't understand. ❞ Was she an oracle of some sort? No average person could just speak truths like that without some divine power at their side. In his mind, the likelihood of her actually having these abilities was slim-to-none, commentary meant to dissuade him on some...possessive note ; however, he cannot fathom for the the life of him why she'd be possessive of him either... What did she gain but a person to chat with?

        Hands cease untying, body straightening from crouched position to regard her. Was she secretly a spirit, a youkai, a god? Those who were there needed him... He couldn't turn his back upon them, even if her words held truth of a certainty beyond a reasonable doubt -- if he died, then he died for them... ❝ Are you attempting to frighten me? ❞

⊰🍁ᴛᴀɴɢʟᴇᴅ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ

[monogatcri]

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