#... not his name

[arisveah]

„we‘ll never know chips last name“ literally wrong that man was MARRIED. his last name is legally, legally Chip Rin and nothing can change that.

[tropiyas]

The Pookie from Halo 3: ODST

[peitalo]

[fofi42]

not his name

Taskmaster s18e03

[superspecial-awesome]

Saw someone type "jonouchey" today

[ghoulodont]

you are stupid in many ways

[sputnikodin]

i accidentally called captain kirk kurt. :-(

[democracyunderground]

[cctinsleybaxter]

Help I've been reading it as fragrant-ceeyuh this whole time

[spookydetective]

why does my phone correct jerma to Hernandez

[flowermask]

i wanna take this guy and squeeze him like a squeaky toy

(please fullview - tumblr butchered the quality)

[cetoddle]

-> waking up from whatever post hysteria induced sleep crash i was in for five hours

-> see a photo of chikorita

-> wow i love pokemon

-> maybe ill get a pokemon calendar for 2025

-> look up 2025 pokemon calendars

-> find one with bellibolt on one of the months

-> try to remember his name

-> very confidently saying out loud, to no one, in a room by myself, “ooooh. bimblebort.”

[eigengrauone]

trent razor

[indigowallbreaker]

Can we get Yuri and Claude with #65 from the kiss prompts for MerMay 🥺🥺🥺

I cannot conceive of their ship name for some reason so here's hoping I've tagged it in a way that makes this findable to the right people! Don't want someone missing their Claude/Yuri fix <3

[other mermay prompts]

65. One Small Kiss, Pulling Away For An Instant, Then Devouring Each Other

--

Yuri heard Claude long before he spoke.

He could always tell when Claude was approaching. Balthus tended to swim like he was fighting the water itself. Constance swam more delicately, hiding from the sun's rays as best she could. Yuri could never hear Hapi approaching and had come to accept that, if it was too quiet, she was probably swimming up behind him.

Claude, though, had a distinctive way of moving through the ocean that Yuri couldn't explain. It used to soothe Yuri to hear the tiny changes in the environment that meant Claude was near. This time, Yuri had to stop himself tensing as that peculiar swish of Claude's tail grew louder.

"There you are," Claude greeted.

"Claude," Yuri returned.

A hand brushed the middle of Yuri's back, just underneath his long hair. "My guess is you had a rough week?"

"Something like that."

"Sorry I wasn't around. Anything I can do to help?"

Yuri looked over his shoulder at Claude, taking in his earnest expression and not letting it fool him for a second. "Perhaps there is."

Spinning around, Yuri shoved Claude against a boulder, one hand holding Claude in place and the other pressing his abalone dagger to Claude's neck. Claude pushed on Yuri's chest in a halfhearted way-- but froze under Yuri's intense glare.

"How long were you going to deceive me?" Yuri growled.

Claude had the nerve to furrow his brows. "Deceive you?"

"You lead me to believe you were just some innocent merman from the northeast seas. Just a humble traveler exploring the Fódlan oceans." Yuri gave a low, humorless chuckle. "I was fine playing along, you know. Despite my best efforts, I'd come to see you as one of my people."

"I am, Yuri." Claude reached up for Yuri's wrist, but Yuri elbowed him away. "What did I do to--"

"I followed you the other day."

That single declaration changed Claude's entire demeanor. He stiffened, puzzled expression dropping into a resolute grimace, and he stopped all feeble attempts of getting away. His gold tail edged in brown pressed against the rock in subservience as he came to the correct conclusion that there was no hiding from Yuri anymore.

"That wasn't how I wanted you to find out." Claude's voice was more measured now. No longer was he talking to his lover, but to his attacker.

Yuri sneered. "Did you intend for me to find out at all?" He leaned in closer, forcing himself to glare into those kelp green eyes. "You're a monster. Half merfolk, half human." He spat the last word.

"I prefer half Fódlani, half Almyran."

"Same thing."

"It's not."

"Monster," Yuri repeated. "What was your plan? Spy on us for the humans? Embed yourself in the community until we were ripe for the taking?"

"Would you believe me if I said my plan was peace?"

Yuri barked empty laughter, letting the tip of his dagger mark a dot of blood on Claude's neck. "Impossible. They are them, and we are us." His eyes narrowed. "And you are neither. Much as you pretend you could be both."

Instead of flinching away from the dagger, Claude leaned forward, causing the dot to become a line across his dark skin. It was Yuri who flinched and pulled it back. "I transform into a human around the time of the new moon," Claude stated. "I've lived as a human. I've lived as a merman. I could tell you everything each side hates about the other-- but I can also tell you how alike we are." A sudden smile took his face. "My teacher, Nader, loves a drink and a good arm wrestling match almost as much as Balthus."

Damn Claude and his infectious smiles. Yuri had to consciously hold his own back. "Why should I believe a word you say?"

"I thought..." Trailing off, Claude leaned forward again, swallowed, tried again, "I thought, if anyone would, it would be you."

Yuri let the dagger fall as Claude finally surged out of his loose hold. At first their lips brushed together so lightly that Yuri thought that would be it. That this truly was a ruse and Claude would snatch up his dagger while Yuri was distracted.

Then Claude pressed against Yuri again, and Yuri opened for him. He let Claude-- a half human, a mostly monster, one of his people-- guide the slow drag of their mouths. Claude's tail-- a tail that didn't exist for a few nights every month-- bumped against Yuri's and Yuri found himself wanting to ask a hundred more questions.

But first there was this kiss. All the rest could come after. Yuri wound his arms around Claude's neck and tried not to think about the gills there closing up, tried not to think about that tongue speaking the human language-- and tried only to think of Claude and his crazy, foolhardy, plausible peace.

[neon-draws-sometimes]

man sometimes I think about the all the things leading up to Fresh’s (irl) creation and I get like. nervous almost?