#...SNIFF SNIFF ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE PLEASE IM SCARED

[eightspringdays]

the fact i have to write a character that speaks the opposite way how Near does it... His antithesis.

denji speaks with simple informal words, he's very impolite. a lot of contractions? idk if it's correct to call them that but I don't know how they woRK. what the fuck is a ya in engliSH, 'im, 'er, 'em.

this panel is the biggest proof of denji's difference in how he speaks, both are saying "Go die", but asa says it in kanji and denji in hiragana. which I think is brilliant because you show without telling that denji speak This Way because he can't read kanji since he never got a proper education, so he doesn't know how to use them

in english Is done like This

But HOW IM SUPPOSED TO DO THIS IF I DONT EVEN KNOW THOSE WORDS MYSELF. "ON YA" .... How many of you exists? ;;

im going thru it.

im gonna (remembers that jokes affect mental health) breakdance softly until I dig a hole in the ground and hide myself forever there

[yuyu1024]

Fate

Pairings: Yoongi × y/n

Genre/tags: Arranged marriage

Warning: 🔞🔞🔞 mention of blood/violence/drugs/trafficing, trauma, mention of killing, kidnapping, gun, mention of food/eating/weight, cursing, sensual touching, making out smoking, smut (but not this chapter)

~~~~[lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 5.2k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

Note:

Until you (mini series)

Part 1 - Prisoner

Part 2 - Escape

Part 3 - Twilight

Part 4 - Fate

A/N: again... im really sorry for being a slow writer/update for this mini series🙏🏻 i can't help it. 😭 I do get msgs asking for updates & i feel bad... so sorry 🥹 I try my best to have time to get into the story/characters whenever i have free time. I work full time and have a 2nd job too so it takes all my energy. I'm really... really sorry.😭

But yeaah, thank you for everyone liking my yoongi fanfic. 🖤🫶🏻 thank you for the patience😭

I hope this chapter is okay ♥️

****

(Prologue/Flashback)

"Sshh..." she covers your mouth for you to stay quiet and not make any noise. She reminds you constantly to keep it together or else they will find you. "Just a little bit more, Yoongi." She whispers. "Calm down..."

You try your best to do what she says because you want you guys to survive this. To escape. However you are a kid and you are terrified. And you can't stop yourself from shaking like a twig. Also you are rapidly breathing through your nose. Tears even start to fill your eyes as you look into her eyes.

"You'll be fine..." she says to you. "Noona, will protect you."

"I'm scared..." You whisper grabbing onto her long braided hair.

You two are a few inches apart. If she could only embrace you, she will. However there are metal bars between you two and she is.... injured.

"Me too." She wants to cry to as she must be as scared as you or maybe, more. But since she's the eldest between the two of you she have to be brave for you. "Just go to sleep... I promise... the moment you wake up...when the sun is shining after the storm tonight... we'll be safe... we'll already be at home..."

"P-promise?"

She tries her best to not break down because she knows that she's promising something that's very unrealistic in your situation right now. Both of you are held captives, kidnapped and waiting to be saved.

"I promise." She sniffs "Just hold onto this for now..." she meant her hair and then reaches her hand to you slowly even it's causing too much pain for her. "Go to sleep... Noona will be right here..." the tip of her fingers barely touched your cheek. "I will protect you..." she adds

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

[Present]

The silence between you two is very deafening. Even the staffs at the mansion notices how both of you are very distant to each other.

Odd right? They should be used to this situation since Yoongi is the silent type or the one who does not talk that much especially to you.

However for you, maybe this is out of character as every one is not used to you being like this. Well THIS silent anyway.

You usually talk and greet them or make small talks with them or Yoongi even if it's just a random question to make him just...talk. You do anything to make him speak to you. You make small efforts to chase his attention just to get him look back at you per say. Like a dog.

But now, since he made sure to leave you the moment you got vulnerable with him during sex and mentioned a feeling you have, which in the first place you had no idea you have, really hurt you this time. Big time. It is a rejection that you never thought would bother you this much.

"You two are awfully quiet." Mrs. Min says as soon as she puts down her cup of coffee on the table. "You two are both quiet originally... I know... but..." she looks at you and Yoongi back and forth twice. "Did you guys had a fight?"

No one answers.

"Guessing...silence means yes?" Mrs. Min looks at us again, hoping someone will speak up. "What did you do?" She asks Yoongi.

But he didn't open his mouth to speak. He just continued on chewing on his breakfast while his eyes are glued to you.

He has been eyeing you since the two of you left the mansion. He have been silently watching you move along, react and walk from your back. You don't notice it as you are trying to achieve to ignore him completely today. And so far, you are a gold medalist at it. You don't even bat an eye on him.

"Fine... not gonna ask anymore questions..." Mrs. Min gives up. "Anyways, after this lunch... I'll have a meeting with Hannah."

Yoongi flinches, finally reacting and gets interested to whatever his mother is saying. "What for?"

"About the private resort project that she is building... she wants my opinion about what brands to use for the decorations. She have a final lists of candidates of brands and she wants to know my say to it."

"Really...."

"Yes... and as soon as it opens... she says you two can go there... and celebrate... as her gift. Since she missed going to your wedding."

"Celebrate?" You finally spoke after how many years. Even Yoongi whip his head to look at you.

"Yes dear," Mrs. Min smiles so brightly and holds your hand. "You're 2nd anniversary... next month... right?"

"Ah, yes... right." You try to smile it away. But deep inside, you are not looking forward to it.

Why would you? Last year Yoongi didn't even greeted you Happy Anniversary. He probably didn't care back then so why would he care now and celebrate this year? This marriage is nothing to him.

"Is she coming here?" Yoongi asks his mother, changing back the subject to Hannah

"No... I am meeting her at her office."

You are holding on for dear life on your gold medal for 'Ignoring my husband award'. You are so curious to look at him. To see his beautiful face, how he reacts when they talk about her. Hannah. The girl you saw more than a year ago. The girl you saw on the driveway, talking to your husband while she hooked her arms on his'. The girl that Yoongi seems interested about. The girl he seems to.... like.

"How about you guys? What are your plans today after our brunch?" Mrs. Min asks

"Hmm.." he sighs heavily and then takes his phone from the table. "Probably fuck my wife " Yoongi answers nonchalantly making you and Mrs. Min almost choke on nothing. That sentence made you even look at him with wide eyes and red cheeks.

"Omo..." Mrs. Min is too stunned to even comprehend what she just heard. "Well... okay... too much information but..." she then takes a sip of her coffee. "You do you."

"I'm sorry..." you apologize to your mother-in-law.

You are embarassed. This topic should be a private matter. Everyone in the mansion already seem to have the idea what you two do on a regular basis but you do hope that outside, no one has to know.

It's not that you are embarassed of having a sex life. It's normal. Yes. But to have to talk about it to his parents, oh dear god, no.

"Why are you apologizing?" Yoongi's face looks so damn serious. "We are husband and wife right?"

You scowl at Him. You don't like how he acts or portrays like sex is just a hobby for him and it's nothing to be embarassed about. Especially in front of his mother while you are present. He really does not treat you like you have any feelings. He is evil.

"Okay... children...children... don't fight about this... it's okay. You already have issues before we got here so... it's fine." Mrs. Min tries to sooth the situation up.

She's so nice to try. Though she does not know the real reason why there is a huge distance between you two today. It's not that simple. You don't even know if she knows how his son treats you.

***

"Sir." Mr. Kim bows as both Yoongi and you arrives at the driveway, about to leave Mrs. Min's property.

"Get in." He orders you

You glare at him then roll your eyes away. You are in no mood now. You have scowled at him earlier already so why not do it more now that he is irritating you.

"Hold on..." he suddenly grabs you by the arm, stopping you from getting in the car. "Did you just fucking roll your eyes at me?" He scoffs

You try your best to pull your arms from his grip but he is stronger than you. "Let me go." You grunt

"What are you doing?" He asks, "You've been.... acting up lately..."

"I don't know...what you're talking about..." you finally freed yourself from his grip.

"Don't act innocent on me... I know you."

"Know me?" You snap. "How? We barely talked these past two years... You only look for me when you want something done and someone to fuck...besides that, I am nothing to you. So how the fuck will you know me?"

Finally! You've said something. However you can't lie to yourself how terrified you are right now. Your legs are shaking. You have never risen your voice like this before. Not with him. Plus Yoongi is so freaking silent. There was no reaction from him not like Mr. Kim who just coughed because of the sudden tension.

Is he in shock? He must be surprised to hear you speak out after all this time. He had never heard you talk like this before. You can't even read his expression. He is just looking down at you, straight on.

"Ahm... Sir... Miss... I'll leave you two... alone." Mr. Kim finally broke the awkward silence. "Just message me if... we're going home."

You glance at him and bow. Also giving an apologetic look since the situation got a bit serious.

And as soon as Mr. Kim is gone from our sight, Yoongi takes a step forward closer to you, making you back up and your behind bumping on the car. "Is that... what you think?"

You glare up at him. "Yes."

"You think... I don't know you?"

"Yes."

He chuckles. "I know you more than you know..."

You frown. "You only see me when you are horny... you don't even talk to me unless to I ask you... unless you tell me what to do and what not to do... so, how would you know anything about me...?"

He scrunches his face. He looks irritated "I see you more than you think." He mumbles. And then he took a step back and looks at you and watch you tremble,"Do you regret it?" He asks

"W-what? Regret what?"

"The sex... do you regret it?"

"W-what? What do you mean...?"

He then puts both his hands on the car, trapping you between. "Just answer the question... do you hate and regret the sex?"

You look away. "No...."

"Do you want us to stop fucking?"

You sigh heavily. "Why are you focusing on the sex?!?" Your brows are furrowed. You are really showing your frustration. "It's not about the sex, Yoongi! There is nothing wrong with the sex... what I just want is... I just..." you look back at his face and you see an empty expression from him. Does he not get what you are saying or is he ignoring the other parts of what you told him. That the only thing he thinks about is your sex life. "Never mind..." you lower your gaze. "It's not like my opinion matter..."

"Y/N..." Yoongi begins. You look back st him waiting for whatever he's about to say. You think he was about to response to you or maybe say what is on his mind as well. (Maybe.) However, both of you got suddenly distracted by the honk of a black sedan car entering the property.

You have seen that car before. It is familiar. And then when it stops and someone steps out of the car...

"Yoongi?" The woman that came out of the passenger seat, is Hannah. "What are you doing here?"

She is smiling ear to ear. Her smile is as bright as her tear drop pear earrings that is perfectly shown under her tucked bob hair. She's... so pretty.

"Oh... Hi..." she waves at you when she finally notices you

"Hi." You try to smile as brightly as you can.

"You must be Yoongi's beautiful wife." She is sweet. She looks like a friendly and easy going person. "I'm Hannah by the way... I'm Yoongi's friend since we're... toddlers..."

"Nice to meet you." You bow

"What are you doing here? Mother said..."

"Ah... yes... we we're supposed to meet at my office but I just came from another meeting and since we will pass by the house I decided to just meet her now..." she explains

"She must be in her room now.. preparing to meet you."

"Oh. I see... well, I guess I'll just surprise her." She grins. "Are you guys leaving?"

"Yeah... we just had brunch with her..."

Fuck. What is going on?

Just a second ago, you're having a serious confrontation with your husband. You guys are about to talk about the situation between you two. Yes, it may not be the ideal 'talk' but it is a start. But then, here you are. Hannah arrived and stole his full attention. Literally, she have all his eyes and ears. You suddenly became a shadow.

Then you are also hearing Yoongi converse. You are hearing how is he when he's not alone with you. You are hearing a side of him that you are not familiar with. 'Fuck Y/N, stop it.' You say yourself

Maybe, you just need to stop. Just stop complaining about his attention and him not liking you. Maybe he is not the problem. Maybe.. it's you? They forced him to marry and got stucked with you. YOU are the problem. You are NOT the person he wanted to marry. You just got selected just because.

You are the problem. As always. Like what everybody says to you.

"I'll just email you my thoughts after..." Hannah says

"Why not discuss it now?" Yoongi suggests

"Hmm...but you're about to leave..." she glances at you

"It's okay." Yoongi then pulls out his phone and messages someone. "I asked Mr. Kim to come... wait for him... I'll be quick." He says to you

You look at him for a second before you turn your back on him. "Sure." You sound lifeless. You sounded like you've given up already.

"Y-yoongi... you're going to make her wait?" She whispers to him but you care definitely hear it

"Let's make it quick. I don't want to work over the weekend."

He's more worried of working on the weekend but not making you stay and wait all alone.

They start to walk away. You could see their reflection through the windows of the car.

They left you alone.

He left you alone.

Then as you are standing there, waiting for Mr. Kim to come back, you slightly bend over your torso, holding onto the yourself as soon as you felt a little uncomfortable feeling on your lower abdomen. It's not painful but it is a bit of discomfort.

"Fuck..." you hiss under your breathe.

You should be careful now. Atleast until it's fully confirmed. Yes, you are pregnant. Well, that's what the PT told you a few days ago.

You took the test, in your bathroom, scared and shaking like a twig. You have never felt this terrified in your life. Ever. And the freaking 3mins of waiting felt like forever whilst you are in there, sitting on the floor.

But yeah, after the torture of waiting, the test did show two lines. It was a faint but it is positive. And during that moment, your world suddenly stopped spinning. You had to gather your thoughts and emotion within the span of 30mins that you have. (Because your maid will enter your bathroom to help you get ready after 30mins). That was one other toture you had to endure. And to add more spice on this never ending problem is that you were all ALONE. You had no one to hold hands or hug for moral support.

You are, all by yourself.

After testing, you did processed the result in your mind and managed to get back right to reality and decide by yourself to be... okay. To take it as another good day. Because this is not something bad. It is a miracle. It's a life.

Though, you can't lie. It was a whirlwind of emotion. And you don't know what to feel yet about it. You are not even sure if you are able to share it with anyone, even Yoongi since you still need to see a doctor to really confirm it.

Confirmation.

You fucking need that final 'yes you are pregnant'. Because your further decisions in life will revovle around that one thing. Decisions that might affect this marriage and basically affect your whole life. So, you really have to find a way to get a doctor's appointment in secret. For now...

"Miss?" Mr. Kim arrives and sees you slouching, "Is everything alright?"

You turn around, stands up straight and smile. "Yes..."

"Are you hurt?" He asks

"I'm fine... but I just think... my stomach feels heavy a bit from eating... I did ate quite a bit." You lie.

"Okay, let me bring you home quick so you could rest." He says

"Thank you."

****

[Yoongi's side]

Yoongi can't sleep. He got home earlier just an hour after Y/N got home. He asked the maids to call her, to have dinner with him, but unfortunately Y/N was already fast asleep.

He waited for her to wake up from what he thinks is just a quick nap. But whenever he asks the maid if she's up, they just shake their head and say sorry.

They fought. He thinks. It felt like they fought. It's his first time hearing her talk to him like that. She have been always timid and her patience with him is very long. However, she finally have had it.

How can you make your wife, who is clearly showing you that she's falling in love with you, start to hate you?

Well, Yoongi knows what he did and is doing to her. He is very controlling, cold and distant. And these are the traits that can't be part of your life especially of you are married. However, this is how he is. As a child no, but ever since the incident happen fifteen years ago, the trauma and the life he had to put through made him, This.

Outsiders might call him as the devil or the punisher of the Min Family because of all the work he is doing inside the office and outside. He is a fighter and his hands are always covered with blood. Though what he's doing is not a crime. The Min's business is not illegal. They control everything that they can do end everything that is illegal in the most legal way possible. If that makes sense.

They were just a business before. A typical rich family. But yeah, since what had happened to them years ago, they changed their rules and how they do it now.

And that's why Yoongi have this cold exterior. He needs to show to everyone who's watching him that he can't falter. That no one could try to even break him like how those monsters break his father. How those monster took them and made them hostages.

10 million. That's all it takes, for some uneducated humans do the most horrendous thing in this world. To hurt and kill an innocent child. A 16yrs old girl and a 14yr old boy.

Their parents were willing to give the money and even more, just for them to surrender their children. However, the fear in them when they know that the children saw their faces, made them decide to end it all.

Yuna, his older sister, sacrificed her life to save Yoongi. She is one brave young lady. She managed to push his brother just in time to fall on the edge, to roll down small hill and get away through the woods. She got shot and died on the spot. Yoongi saw everything but didn't had the time to grieve then and there because he had to survive yet. To run.

It took two more days before he was found. How he survived? No one knows. But since that day, the happy and cheerful little boy grew up and became the cold Yoongi everyone knows now.

He knows that what he have been through is not an excuse to treat his wife so coldy like this. She was only forced the marry him. She didn't even know him. Which is his fault as well because he didn't allow her to enter his bubble. Up to now...

However, through all the times that he have been with her little by little, as per his therapist's words, 'You are slowly breaking.' She said.

She said that before, whenever she asks him about his wife. He is usually nonchalant or indifferent. Like he's just talking about someone he randomly met. But then one day, the therapists said, she saw a glimpse of change in his eyes the moment she asks about his wife. His expression is the same but his eyes started to shift like he's thinking about it more before he speaks.

'You care. You just don't know how to show it' she said to him.

At first, When Yoongi heard that from his therapist, he got worried. Not because He is starting to have this feeling for his wife. No. His wife is never and will never be a bad thing that happened to his life. He is worried because, what if he breaks his cold exterious and somewhere out there in the world takes advantage of it and what happened years ago will happen again?

That is his only concern. That is why, he added more men. That's why Y/N can't leavr a house alone. That's why he always tracks her phone wherever she is. That's why he can't sleep without know if she is fine or not.

If only... he never had these issues, these traumas from the past, maybe... it's easier.

"Please... don't quit on me..." he says out loud as he closes his eyes, imagining the smiling face of his wife. "Don't... leave me..." he mutters

****

After what it seems like a very, very long day for you you're finally home. You are so tired that the first thing you did after getting changed is sleep. It feels like this is the longest you've slept in like forever.

You keep turning and waking up every now and then but your body kept forcing you to not wake up. It's like its telling you that you needed this. After all of the worrying you have been having these past few days. This sleep is for you.

But then maybe after hour five of sleeping, you felt something cold touch your skin. It didn't sting. It oddly felt good.

Slowly opening your eyes, you see a blurred figure in front of you. He's so close that you could actually smell his scent. The smell of baby powder.

"Yoongi?" You ask softly as your eyes slowly adjusted to the little light of your lamp shade. But no one answered back. You then rub your eyes to wake yourself up a bit more. Just to be surez you saw what you saw.

No one. There's no one there.

"Did I... just dream about him?" You ask, looking at the ceiling. "But I swear..." you trail off. "How funny... even in my dream... I see him..."

But you swear you smelled his scent. Your imagination of him is getting stronger. Your memory of him is getting move vivid. Even the smell now. That's how longing you are of him.

You miss him. Even though he is there  you miss him. Oddly, you miss the time that both of you are just sitting down together in his home office and just reading. You miss casually asking him questions. You miss hearing him talk even though he's talking about his work and not to you. You miss him even though you just saw him earlier. Even though... he hurt you.

His scent. The scent you really, really like. His smell whenever you two have sex. It's not strong but it's there. Whenever you close your eyes and drift away from the high, you know you are okay as long as you could smell and hear him.

Fuck. Is this how being in love is?

Just thinking about him makes you want to cry. You are frustrated at him but at the same time frustrated to yourself as well. Why is communicating is so hard? You know that's the issue. Both of you are not good with talking nor expressing yourselves. Well, that's what Taehyun told you earlier.

Yeah, you went on a side trip earlier before going home, to meet your friend at his work. You needed someone to talk to and you know Taehyung is always there ready to listen to you.

You poured your heart out earlier, crying and all. You were sorry for disturbing him at work but you needed that cry and that hug. You had to told him your feelings about Yoongi. You have to say it out loud for you to truely understand the situation and yourself.

You needed someone's opinion to point out the obvious so it could stick in to your brain.

Growing up to a family where your opinion does not matter took a toll on you as well. Especially to an adoptive family. A family that only needed you for money.

To them, you always feel left out and does not deserve a voice. They always tell you that they only gave you a roof above your head and food to eat because you are what they needed. A piggy bank.

Your parents died in an accident years ago, when you are just 12yrs old. There was a police chase in the highway that rainy day. Every one is on high alert and giving way. But well, the criminals weren't exactly running away and trying to avoid cars. They hit quite a few vehicles during the chase and one of them was your parent's. The crash caused an explosion, killing them in an instant.

And like any drama stories on TV, yout aunt took you in because of your parent's insurance. They are not big but it is a decent amount. However, they could not actually touch it since it is saved for your education that's why the first month of you staying with them was torture. They beat you, make you work and starve you from time to time because they said, 'you don't deserve to eat unless you work for it'.

One reason why starving yourself was easy for you when you need to.

But then things changed a bit when someone knocked on the door one day and gave your adoptive parents a good amount of money. You remember the man saying 'this is for the trouble and lost we caused your family during our battle for saving our children.' You do remember you aunt, being a good actress that day, crying and all. You even saw them be in a good mood. Everyday because of that money. So since then, whenever you have a part time job or one good seasonal job, you save up and give it to them.

You do this not because you want them to be happy. You do this because you wanted peace for yourself. They will not hurt you if you give them what they need.

This is one reason too why you accepted this marriage. Even though, you know you will have trials too. But atleast you know, no one is going to hurt you physically anymore.

Though, you are having troubles now too.... it is still different. Like you said, it is the communication.

Is it all Yoongi's fault? No. Taehyung said that maybe, since I'm very submissive and him being very dominant, grew up giving orders or not listening to anyone because he is who he is, it affected the talking part in the relationship. Though he cannot say that it is a hundred percent fact. Because he explain, everyone have different stories of growing up and these affects every facet of their whole being when they get old.

Well, that's what you got from all his talk. Half of it, you are numb from all the crying and can't hear properly.

Though that talk with Taehyung,you needed that. Now all you have to do is talk to Yoongi.

If.... you have the courage too.

It is so hard to start a conversation not knowing how he feels about you. It is scary and a risk. But you are hoping it will turn out good especially now that you are expecting.

"Oh, right! The result!" You got up immediately and grab your phone.

You visited Taehyung in the hospital and he got to help you get a blood test to confirm. You forgot to talk to him about the result because you two are busy with doing friend therapy. He said, he'll just email you the result.

But then as you were scrolling scrolling through your emails your stomach growls. "I'm hungry..." you mumble and pause. "Taehyung said that if I am really pregnant... I need to eat properly now..."

And you haven't eaten dinner since you just slept since you came home. You need to eat.

Looking at the time it's pass 10pm already. Everyone must be asleep now or getting to bed so you must go and make yourself food yourself.

"Just one toast." You say as you push your blanket away. "Or two..."

You walk along the hallways as quietly as you can and then take the stairs instead of the elevator, going to the upper ground, so you could not disturb anyone.

There is still minimal light coming from the kitchen area. 'Maybe someone is still there?' You thought to yourself and hoping it is one of the maids so they could help you grab the things in the pantry. Since you don't really know how they organize it.

But then the second you turn to the corner, to enter the doorway

"Ah!" You hit your head first at something. Or at someone

Then after collecting yourself from bumping on someone, you look up to see who it was. "Sorry, I wasn't looking at--"

Fuck! It's not Yoongi nor anyone of the staff.

You tried to run back and scream but it was too late. He was quick to cover your mouth with a cloth. A scented cloth. The smell quickly pierced your nostrils and immediately made you feel dizzy and sleepy.

You are barely awake but you know he carried you over his shoulder. You could see the floor and the lights slowly to flicker. You are about to loose it.

'Help... Someone.... Yoongi... please...' You say to yourself before totally loosing consciousness.

-----

Taglist based on the replies last post 🖤

@gaby-93   @goodbyetwenty   @baechugff

@amyz78   @qeen123   @armystay89   @bangtannie7 @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs @corruptedmistress @ot72025 @cheezwiz

@xkh0  @eli-deville

[tfyoulookingatgiuxs]

Gameboy

Billy Hargrove x NonBinary!Reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: You didn't think the day could get any worse than this, but apparently you were wrong. tired from work, you came home and had to endure the shouting of your boyfriend and his little sister Maxine. Billy was going too far and you had enough.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: +18 MDNI!! angst, blurb, very bad language, argue, broke-up, sigarettes, threats, intimidation, use of Y/N, no prounons NonBinary!Reader, theme about sex, theme about violence, anger issue, daddy issue, toxic relationship, bad ending. (Please be careful what you are about to read, the themes here are quite heavy and with a bad ending. If you don't feel like it, don't read, thanks)

𝐀/𝐍: My first Billy Hargrove One-Shot. I have to say that he's a character i dont have much interest to be honest, but if you want me to do more one-shots about Billy let me know! Please support new writers and reblog! Im sorry for my english, this is not my native language. Hope you enjoy! (DIVIDER NOT MINE) word count: 2.4K

Fuck, fuck and fuck! You thought in your head when you wanted to scream. You had just left the bar where you worked and you could tell you had had a rough day. Your boss didn't stop tormenting you, by now you seriously thought he was mad at you. But that doesn't mean you stopped trying, moving forward and taking criticism and then improving yourself, but despite this the people around you seem bad every day.

You didn't have to think about it. Absolutely not! Now you would have gone to your boyfriend's house and he will surely console you, tell you that everything will be fine–wait...no. Absolutely not. You haven't done these things for almost two months because of your full-time job and the constant evenings where Billy went out, obviously not caring that you needed him. You tried to talk to him a couple of times to find out if something was wrong but he only answered "I'm fine, we're fine, why are you asking me?" You seriously started to think if you were the crazy one or if tiredness was playing a bad joke on you. Billy seemed calm and sees nothing wrong with your relationship. You didn't say anything. You knew the issues Billy was going through with his father lately, so you let it go and once again agreed with him, and blamed it on the stress.

You got to his door before you even knocked and Billy opened it angrily, which scared you. As soon as he noticed you he took a breath and gave you a simple "Hi" before letting you inside. It often happened that you went to sleep at your boyfriend's house, especially when his father wasn't there. As soon as you entered you felt a certain tension in the air and saw Billy take his jacket from the coat rack. You were about to ask something but the boy with golden curls beat you to it "Leave Max alone, that little bitch won't come out of her fucking room until I say so" With that I left the house slamming the door.

Right from him. He doesn't even tell you where he's going or with whom.

Apparently he had argued with Maxine, his younger sister. You completely ignored what Billy said to you and went to Max's door. You could clearly hear that she was crying and that hurts you. Since you met Max she has always seen you as a second parent: kind, helpful, affectionate and above all loving. You were happy to have this relationship with her and when she happened to argue with her brother, you couldn't help but go and console her or try to resolve the situation. Before knocking you looked around, the house was a real mess, or rather a disaster, all of Billy's things scattered everywhere, starting with: weights, ashtrays, porn magazines and gameboys. Shit...

You still don't understand how you managed to fall in love with an imbecile like him. So handsome with those curls and shining face but also so arrogant, messy and not very polite. You gently knocked on the door “Max, it's me Y/N, can I come in?” You heard the little girl sniff and she agreed. You opened the door and found Maxine in tears and her face completely red from the outburst. Her pillow was wet while her cleres were a shade of red from crying. She was lying on the bed and as soon as she saw you, her breath seemed to come back. You sat next to her while you used your fingers to fix some strands of her red hair.

"Maxine...what happened?" You said almost whispering. It took her a while to answer you but in the end she did "Dad...a little while ago he was here and he was arguing with Billy," she began "I didn't know what they were arguing about but then he started hitting him.. ." Her tone was shaky as she tried to collect herself "Did Dad hit Billy?" You asked and she nodded “Yes, the asshole” okay, you got the point. “I stopped him but after mom and the asshole left, Billy started yelling at me” you raised an eyebrow “Why on earth?” The question of when might be obvious seemed difficult for Max to answer. “I don't know for sure, he just told me that I shouldn't meddle in his business” you hugged her and she immediately hugged you back.

“I'll talk to him, I promise” You said and Max looked up immediately. "No Y/N, don't do it. He's too angry and I don't want him to be angry at you too" you smiled at his sweet thought towards you. Max was now like a little sister or a daughter to protect for you, you wouldn't have let Maxine spend the evening locked in her room even though she hadn't done anything "Don't worry about me, I can handle your brother" Oh well, knowing how to handle Billy Hargrove was a big word, but that didn't stop you from consoling Max and preparing her some snacks to stop her crying.

You laughed and joked and Max had finally regained her smile and as if you were a good parent you put a blanket over her while you turned off the light, leaving Max to sleep peacefully. After at least fifteen minutes, Billy came home with a bottle of beer in his hand, you snorted at the sight. You had been waiting for him all evening and you would have at least hoped that for once he wouldn't come back drunk although he seemed quite sober.

"Where have you been?" You asked as you crossed your arms over your chest. He looked at you with a face that got on your nerves, he was bored.

"I asked you, where have you been" You repeated and he made a small moan and then replied "Outside for some fresh air" You didn't want to ask why he was drunk, you had gotten used to it by now so you let it go. Meanwhile he had thrown his jacket on the sofa.

"Why did you and Maxine argue?" Billy turned to look at you. He sat comfortably on the living room sofa bare-chested while he was ready to light his cigarette which he held between his lips. "Where's Max?" He asked "In her room to sleep after you made her cry" his face didn't change a bit, he was serious and definitely bored "Y/N, I specifically told you to leave Max alone, she was supposed to stay in her room " you nodded "In fact, she stayed in the room, but I kept her company" He let out a laugh and then looked back at your figure "You shouldn't have interacted with her" you shook your head "I'm sorry Billy, but I don't stay at your rules" at that statement he took the cigarette out of his mouth "I just want to know why you picked on her, you know I don't like seeing you or your sister like this"

"It's none of your business. What happens here is none of your business Y/N" you were shocked "Excuse me? You're my boyfriend, what happens to you is a fact that until proven otherwise concerns me too" You took a few steps closer towards the sofa. Billy giggled again and you were sure that the next one he would make would drive you mad "And let's hear, why on earth?" You gave an obvious look "Um, hello? We're engaged Billy, engaged!" You timed the last word well "Oh right, I forgot" he said it in a sarcastic way and now your nerves were getting frayed "Oh, I'm sorry this is weighing on you Billy" you too played the sarcasm card and he rolled his eyes "What the fuck Y/N! Now I have to tell you everything I do?" You nodded quickly "Yes, you piss me off that I have to tell you where I'm going, with who and why otherwise you'll ban me from going out" You almost screamed but then lowered your voice remembering Max in the other room.

Billy had lit his cigarette in the meantime "But that has nothing to do with it -" you stopped him while your blood was boiling "It certainly has something to do with it William!" Your eyes were different, they were like Billy had never seen them and when you used his real name he understood that you were seriously pissed. Billy hates being called by his real name and you knew it very well, you did it on purpose. You wanted him to understand how serious you were and how tired you were of the current situation.

“How dare you call me?” Even though he was drunk, Billy was high and his eyes were fixed on you as they gave you a horrible feeling. They wanted to intimidate you, but you weren't like that and he knew it from the first moment he met you. Even if you were afraid that he would knock your teeth out and then make you spill all your blood until you apologized, but you were brave and you wouldn't let yourself be bossed around.

You pointed your finger at him "Oh no! Don't try to make that angry dick face because I'm the angry one, you understand?" He was surprised by your arrogant response "Things have been going on like this for two months and I can't stand it anymore. You barely look at me, all you do is go out in the evening and you don't even tell me where you're going, but you do it when you're too drunk to drive and I have to pick you up" You started and he looked like he was listening intently "And this happens every Friday night Billy. I come home from work tired and destroyed by those filthy pieces of shit and instead being close to me all you do is complain" He snorted and now gave you a different look. He put the cigarette in the ashtray, even though he hadn't smoked it at all. He seemed calm and approached you smiling lovingly... was it the alcohol by any chance? Or maybe bipolar?

"Okay honey, you're right. I'm sorry, now how about we go relax over there–" you pushed him. You were disappointed. His response disgusted you more than expected "No Billy. You won't play your fucking game on me telling me I'm right when in reality you just want to take me to bed and fuck me the way you like it" his face was back and angry more than first "But apparently the other times you didn't hesitate to open your legs for me" it was cheeky and disgusting and you slapped him. You had become a burning fire and you were sure that you would burn him and his house down "Because I was blinded by a filthy imbecile asshole like you. I thought you loved me..." You felt the burning in your eyes as your eyes became shiny. You were too weak to face the truth but you needed it...as much as you loved that boy with all your heart, he would never love you "Oh so now it's me not loving you?" He said dramatically and the tears came out and this time you screamed "Billy, you never console me and only seek me out when you feel like having sex with me. What did you take me for? A toy? I'm your fucking gameboy by any chance?" He tried to answer but couldn't find the right words and blurted out "Shut your mouth" your nervous system was out of control and you raised your voice again "Not this time Billy! Not after I've opened and closed it as you please!"

Now you didn't care who could hear you or who you would disturb. You were tired. You didn't want this. You wanted a serious relationship with a serious person. You wanted someone who values ​​you and takes care of you when you need it, always available and who doesn't see you as a sex toy giving you false illusions. "Calm down, young lady! Show respect" you looked at him and in front of you you had another person. Not Billy Hargrove, but William Hargrove...the real him. Despite everything he was that and you were sorry for ruining yourself by being around him. You didn't think he would ever threaten you, an attitude you hated and hoped your boyfriend wouldn't attribute to "Wow...now you're threatening me?" Billy later realized what he said and didn't reply "Congratulations Billy Hargorve. You ruined my life. You made fun of me and took advantage of me and used me to please your cock when it got hard and needy. But worse…you became your father” you never thought you would say it, but you did. With that sentence you knew you would unleash his anger and you didn't give him time to react "It's over." You announced and then headed towards the door and exited the house as he yelled after you in anger. You didn't want to hear it or deal with it ever again. You had endured enough and it was time to end it.

You had ended a year-long relationship and you now ask yourself in tears as you walked quickly to your house as you had done. You didn't know that obviously. You will never understand, you loved him, what did you need to know or realize? As beautiful and magical as love could be, it was also blind and cruel. It seemed to be a difficult game where the only possibility of victory was to survive until the game itself got tired of testing you, and then it throws a truth in your face that you would rather ignore. But ultimately it was better to suffer for the truth than to live in something that didn't exist.

Now you needed to get up and continue to live your life but you weren't motivated to move forward and live like you did before working, especially now that the only person you loved was just a liar who loved playing with people's feelings and what's more he preferred masturbating to porn magazines than spending sweet moments with you. Would you have suffered? Yes. And you don't know for how long, but you hoped for little since you couldn't cry and dry up your tears for someone who never deserved you and who the only thing he ever worshiped was your body.

[yukiroocloud]

Spider!Sanzu

Listen to Asmr too much:>this been on my mind for while…*cough* I fucking weak for monster fucking writing this at 3am….worth it:) so enjoy my horny love ;)

Contain-Soft dom!Sanzu,hybrid Fem!Reader,dub-con,Sanzu being yandere,Mention Predator/Prey,breeding kink,Pussy slap(2),dirty talk,Pet name(Princess,bunny,pretty..)humiliation ,Foreplay,Slight degradation,lil bitblood play,idk size kink maybe?

If I miss something tell me:3 I had too much fun writing this:) it might be short but I will improve in the future work;> it might have grammar error because English is not my first language.

Tagging: @i4nanami

“Minor don’t interact”

“Why…did..I end up here?…..” Why you asking yourself? Well,apparently you stuck at giant spider web. You been squirming but you can’t get out. You just hopping around finding food,but end up stuck on some spider web. You feeling scared and pray that spider won’t devour you. Speaking of devil, you hear a footsteps. You starting to squiming and start to screaming for help.

“Well,well,well…What do we have here?” You turn to look and you saw half human body and half spider. His hair are pink and long. You can’t hold your tear anymore. He smile seeing weak bunny trying to escape.

“Please…L-let me go….I don’t want to d-die yet.” You begging him with tear falling down. He walking closer to you and caress your right cheek. He has this creepy grin and said

“Aww,I can’t,pretty bunny. It would be wasted to let something cute away,now isn’t it?” He said with that low kinda seductive voice. You just want to push him away but you can’t. Because both of your hand stick to his web. His grin is wider and chuckled

“Now,now, you being a bit greedy,don’t you think? You stuck into my web that supposed to catch a prey, and you’re here begging me to letting you go?” The pink hair spider leaning closer to her neck taking a sniff of her scent.

“No! Please….don’t eat me…I will do anything just let me go pls….” You said looking at him with tear. He was shock for a bit and smirk. Then ask

“Anything,eh? Well,why don’t you be good lil bunny and let me take care of you? Sound like a deal right?” The pink hair spider starting to attack your neck, licking…savoring your taste. You whine and start to moan quietly.

“Can I at least know your name?” You breath out for him to stop what he doing for a bit. “Haruchiyo…Haruchiyo Sanzu..” With that he continues to suck your collarbone. You already know Sanzu, he bit her. She Yelp and feeling liquid ooze out from her neck. He hummed at the taste.

“You’re taste so sweet…I might not hold myself anymore.” His hand roam her fragile body making her shiver. Her voice that came out of her making Sanzu almost losing his freaking mind. He continue his work until his hand reach at her wet cunt.

“Oh? You actually quite wet…such a fucking slut. You wish this to happen,didn’t you? What a needy bitch.” You whine at his humiliation but you can’t help it. “N-no…please…hah…ahng…d-don’t t-touch me…there ah..” You moan loudly. He rubs her clit with his cold finger. You twitch and this pleasure hit you so hard. He push two fingers in to your wet hole. You grip his shoulder tightly. He curse as he keep thrusting his finger in to tight wall.

“Fuck…so tight…your pussy taking my finger so well.” He breath out and sucking her breast like there is no tomorrow. You keep going on scream and moaning like bitch in heat. You feeling strange sensation. “Im….gonna c-cum…Sanzu..ahh!” After you finish the sentence, he pull out his finger. You let out a small whimper. He look at you seductively.

“Aww,look at you! I think you really getting comfortable. But, I only allow you to cum on my cock,bunny.” Sanzu let his cock free and your eyes widened. “How is that gonna fit?” You thought as he tease you by rubbing up and down on your wet part.

“Just..put it in already..” you said cannot take his teasing anymore. “Alright,pretty thing .” He thrust up roughly. You scream as his huge cock stretching your gummy wall. He didn’t even let you adjust. You cry and he whisper some dirty word,humiliating her as well.

“I can’t actually believe this…you are so easy to be use. Letting me fucking you dumb. Well what do you think…if I breed this tight lil pussy of your. What a whore.” As he suck her neck while you keep moaning. He is right. The only thing in your mind is him and his cock. When he is spider that can eat you in a second.

“S-slow down,Sanzu…ugh…I can’t take…it” Your mind getting blurry and he chuckled darkly. “Baby,you can take it. I know you can…fuck! I’m gonna breed this tight pussy. Can you feel that I’m deep inside you.” With one last thrust, you feel hot liquid going inside. He grunt and pulled out watching cum oozing out. He use his finger to push back in. You panting and slowly unconscious. Sanzu lift you up.

“I think im gonna keep you. You’re mine.” With that he kiss your cheek.

[lexprius]

a cup of coffee? p.js ff

so this is my first fic, please mind the mistakes and grammars. english isnt my first language, now, lets get it!

2:00 A.M

you we're sitting at you're living room couch with tearful eyes. you sobbed and sobbed praying it was all a dream. you shouted you're lungs out asking "what did i do wrong? what did i? tell me!" you cried all night. heres what happened.

EARLIER, AT 12:00 A.M

you and you're parents we're joking around and talking about you're future. "dad watch out!" you shouted. you're dad gave you a confused look, as he turned to face the windows he saw a incoming van. then...all you saw was black. you woke up to see you're parents..dead, blood splattered all over their lifeless bodies, glass shards inserted into their skin leaving open wounds. luckily you, you had a few cuts and wounds but you made it out alive. police and an ambulance we're surrounding the car. the police sent a taxi for you to go home. with teary eyes that blurred out you're vision, you hopped into the taxi and made you're way home..

PRESENT

you couldnt sleep that night because of the tragedy, you felt a vibration on you're thigh, you checked it to see you're phone vibrating with a caller id. it was you're best friend jisung. why would he call at such an hour?

y/ns pov

you: w-why did you call? (sniff)

jisung: i knew what happened to you y/n..im sorry for you're loss. i can come over if you want?

you: thanks sungie, b-but i-i dont think you're parents w-would allow..

jisung: oh, thats no big deal! im actually alone at home, my parents arent here, they went to a trip.

you: o-oh..w-well i guess you can come over.

jisung: thanks y/n, i'll be there in a minute okay? stay strong~

you: dont forget to bring an umbrella okay? its raining out.

jisung: dont worry i wont

i hung up, threw my phone at the other end of the couch, i turned on the tv and watched a bit to keep my mind off my parents.

2 MINUTES LATER

i heard the front door ring, i stood up and opened the door revealing Jisung, but with wet hair and soaking clothes holding a bag of tteokbokki and sundubu.

you: jisung get in! you're gonna get sick!

i motioned for him to get in, he rushed inside quickly. hes clothes dripping all over the carpet. i grabbed a towel and some of my dads clothes..just by holding a bunch of i was already trying to hold back my tears. i lended them to jisung trying to hide my welled up eyes.

you: i told you to bring an umbrella.

jisung: sorry..i forgot

you replied with a smile and mouthing the words "its okay" to him, you grabbed a towel and dried him up

jisung: thanks y/n..

you: n-no prob, d-do you wanna eat?

jisung: yeah, im hella hungry

you took out the foods from the plastic bags and started munching them down. there was a tense and awkward atmostphere between you and jisung, jisung decided to break the silence by asking you a question.

jisung: can i stay for the night? i get scared when im home alone in the dark.

you: s-sure..

jisung: i feel really really sad for you y/n..i hope that you feel okay..

you: i feel so depressed already ji..do you know how hard it is to loose someone who raised you?

jisung: i know how it feels like..my grandpa passed away leaving my mom in tears..

you: its..its just so painful! its like multiple guns, and knives..all sorts of dangerous things hits you.

jisung gave you a warm and heartfelt hug...you cried on his shoulder..letting it all out.

you: (sob) w-w-why d-did have t-to b-be like t-this su-sungie? w-what did i do wrong to deserve this pain?

jisung: you did nothing wrong y/n-ssi..ms and mr. kim became beautiful angels soaring high above and sending the purest and whitest doves to you from the heavens..me and you are lucky that..we saw an angel..

you: thank you ji..

you then felt another warm embrace but from you're backside..you felt it was you're parents..

you: m-mommy..d-daddy..i love you..

1 HOUR LATER

you we're on the couch laying with jisung with you're head resting on his arms

you looked up at him and smiled

you: you really had the urge to take a selfie didnt you? (giggle)

jisung: (smile) nothings wrong with it right hehe~

you guys watched movies for hours..until you hadnt realize you fell asleep in jisungs embrace and he took another selca because he couldnt resist how cute you looked.

eventually he fell asleep too.

NEXT MORNING

you woke up to jisung sleeping next to you and you're tiny body wrapped around his arms, a red tint flushed all over you're face realizing what you have just saw. meanwhile, jisung woke up without you realizing because you we're blushing really hard almost becoming the color of his red sweater, jisung sat up from the sofa, he rested his chin on you're shoulder and wrapped and arms around you're tiny waist. you flinched at his sudden action but..you liked it.

jisung: morning~

you: good morning sung~

you saw with a smile and a small laugh, you and him jumped off the couch and headed you're way to the kitchen. you grabbed a bowl, a carton of milk, a box of cereal, and a metal spoon. the coldness of the metal sending shivers down you're body as you look over and glance at jisung at the kitchen counter grabbing a cup of water then making his way to reach out to you're cupboards to grab the coffee mix. the way his brown almost autumn like hair, his face that shined as the sun escapes the windows, the way his plump lips head towards his mug of coffee, and his adorable eyes that curve into a cresent as they smile when his eyes meet you'res..all these just make him look so..so alluring. you snapped back into reality as you felt something cold flowing down you're hands. you quickly placed the milk carton back on the table and rushed to get tissues to wipe off the remaining milk of you're hands. once you got them all off you sighed and scrunched you're face looking at you're overflowing bowl of cereal.

you: what a great start to my morning.

jisung: (laugh) totally!

you grabbed a towel and started wiping the table clean. you made yourself another cereal. once you succeded you placed it on the table in the living room, and plopped yourself down on the couch. jisung then approached you and handed you a mug.

jisung: a cup of coffee?

you: thanks ji (smile)

you reached for the mug and took a sip from it. you settled the mug back down on the table as you felt a slight bounce on the couch. you look over to see jisung sipping his coffee. suddenly, jisung flinched and quickly placed his cup on the table and let out a loud groan.

jisung: ahh! its hot!

you:(laugh) you should have blowed the coffee first (laugh)

jisung: (giggle)

11:00 AM

you we're on you're phone looking for some ideas for you and jisung to do cause both of you we're hella bored. you look over to jisung on his phone talking to his friend, renjun.

he looked over to you, he covered his phone speaker and asked

jisung: can he come over?

you: o-oh..y-yeah s-sure

jisung: thanks y/n!

jisung: okay hyung, you can come over!

you heard that renjun boy say "awesome!" in excitement. jisung ended the call then faced you

jisung: invite one of you're friends! then we can all have fun together?

you: thats awesome ji!

you say to him while he gave his smile that you can't get enough of. you decided to call you're friend yeeun, you dialed her number, you heard a familliar voice from he other line.

yeeun: hey y/n~~ so whats up?

you: w-wanna come over?

yeeun: heck yeah! what are we gonna do?

you: me and jisung are bored as hell yeeun, so we decided we wanted to bring some friends over.

yeeun: okay! i'll be there, time?

you look at jisung mouthing the words "what time?" and jisung replied with "2:00"

you: 2:00, if you're fine with it?

yeeun: sureeee~ okay gotta go now girlie, bye~

you: bye yeeun~

you ended the call and jisung looked at you

jisung: have you thought of something to do?

you: no, my mind is blank. you?

jisung: same..ah! i forgot i have twister! do you know how to play?

you: yeah! okay lets do that? anything else?

jisung: movies!

you: (giggle) you're so cute when you're excited

jisung blushes at the compliment he recieves, he scratches the back of his neck and just smiles at you.

you: o-oh yeah..w-wanna go to the park before they arrive?

jisung: o-oh, y-yeah sure why not?

you: i-i'll tell y-you s-something t-there..

you stood up and took a quick shower and prepared yourself. the thing is..you've been crushing on jisung for the past few months. you decided you wanted to tell him today

as you exited you're room you saw his tall figure standing in the living room waiting for you. his brown hair caged in his black hat, his lips curving into a smile as he sees something cute or funny on his phone. ugh, he was just so beautiful. he's eyes you'res.

you: jisung, lets go

jisung: ah, okay

you unlocked the door and stepped outside the home with jisung following you're footsteps.

Minutes Later

you lead jisung to the most beautiful part of the park, the cherry blossoms. where most couples go to. you faced jisung and took a deep breath.

you: okay..i have been keeping this for so long now and i decided today was the day i wanted to tell you.

jisung: w-what do you wanna tell me?

you: i grew feelings for you jisung! i-i like you- no..i love you park jisung.

jisung was shocked. he didnt speak but instead came closer towards you and cupped you're face.

jisung: i love you too, y/n.

he kissed you're lips as you stood there shocked. but of course..you kissed back. loving every moment. jisung broke the kiss, held you by the waist, lifted you and spun you around.

jisung: be mine?

you: definitely

[wannawrite]

You Are // jiaer + yien

A sis is yeOLLING she cant find her english homework and school is being crap on the first 2 weeks I just started sec 1 and there's homework from like 4 different subjects school let me live thank you im SO SO tired ugh anyway i hope your day was amazing,,, please get enough rest and drink ur fluids, all of you - Admin N ♡♡

_________

I climb onto the ride with him with the biggest teasing grin on my face, a twinkle in my eye playing at his little phobia as I say confidently, "You're gonna enjoy this, Yi En ge ge."

Yi En's eyes, gaze even softer than usual when he's timid, look at me with fear as his big, round pupils start to shrink. Unsure of the future in front of him, his mind starts to shrink along like two walls closing in on him, snatching the breath from his lungs. His Adam's apple dips continuously as I feel his sweat glazed fingers wrap themselves around mine into a little cocoon.

"J-Jia Er, I'm scared." he blurts, small figure trembling vigorously like a little butterfly caught in the rain, wings bent and covering his frame. I kiss him on the cheek gently before I flick a finger up, gesturing to my foster brother.

"Yi En, look at the sky." I say. His eyes follow suit, and trail up.

"What do you see?"

"It's...it's blue. And it's blurry." Yi En gulps, swallowing the balls of air particles expanding wider and wider in his throat each time. In an attempt to calm him down briefly, I put a hand around his neck and stroke it gently with my thumb, replying, "You didn't say it was cloudy, did you?"

Yi En looks at me perplexedly, and with the tears shimmering and spiraling themselves around his soft, pretty eyes, he thaws a crack in my heart just by muttering, "There are no clouds."

"That's why," I sniff, placing my thumb to his eyes and freeing the long held back tears out of that beautifully sculpted, mocha brown cage of theirs, "You remove the clouds from your eyes. The sky isn't crying today, so you won't be crying today too, Mark Yi En Tuan. Look at the sky again, and please, try and see a clear one. I'm here for you if you need me, okay? Don't think I'm so bloody incapable because I'm just one year younger. We're in this together." I finish with a little more dignity.

He smiles his soft, dimply smile, the one where the roof of his lips doesnt move as much as other smiles so it looks absolutely adorable, before saying, "Thank you, you smooth little boy. I'll see a lot of clear skies today."

Now I too, have a battle to win against my tears.

"I stole that from Namjoon. He's great at uttering poetic crap like this," I cough modestly as Yi En clambers into the seat next to me. He pulls the harness shaped safety bars over his head, which protects his small waist well. I swear I see a look of panic flash past his face in my peripheral vision as I pull over my own safety bars, and my pulse rate can't help but rise a little. My turn for the gaze in my eyes to bear uncertainty and fear, I ask, "Yi En, are you alright?"

With the small, not so obvious smile that looks even more attractive than his normal, goofy wide ones, he replies, "Yeah, because of you." That smile is coy, and small-not broadcasted to the entire world and spreading around its warmth, but rather, seemingly reserved for my eyes and my eyes only. The sunlight outlines his features and his tiny, tousled black curls, and I can't help but return the smile. My foster brother looks so attractive, he'd definitely pick up a girlfriend in no time when he grew up and puberty hit him like a truck-

"HAHAHAHAHAA, ah, Jia Er, you're so funny." Yi En says, a cheeky look playing on his soft, demure features, not seeming so soft and demure anymore after making fun of my thoughts that had slipped out quickly by that careless, troublemaker 乌鸦 mouth of mine.

"Shut up!" I retort, tints of red splashing onto my cheeks like watercolour roses as a sheepish grin spreads across my face. I bicker for a while with Yi En before we hear a sound, familiar to the construction works that were frequently held at that quaint, boxed in home of ours.

The gears carry us up, and the metallic 'clink clink' sound of the gears smashing against each other ruthlessly pounds and resounds in both our ears. Like the gears, Yi En's teeth smashes together with a 'clak' before they start to chatter, fear swallowing him up as his eyes start to widen in horror.

"Jia-Jia Er, you'll be with me, right?" He sends a weak, quivering smile my way that shakes and crumbles under the harsh brick of fear. A single tear rolling over my rosy, baggy eyelids and onto the metal floor of the car, I reply with the release a shaky breath, "Mark. I'll always be with you. You're my Yi En ge ge, how could I not be here with you? I'd rather die, thank you very much."

"You keep quiet. Don't curse yourself like this."

And just as we say it, the incessant clicking of the gears gradually slow down, before coming to a halt.

The car dips, and the wind whips against our hair and messing it into a little bird nest (for ahgases? wink wonk) as my adrenaline rises at the feeling of gravity seeping away and leaving mine and Yi En's poor heart to beat continuously. We slide down at the speed of lighting, diverse shades of green blurs whizzing past us below. Tingles of pleasure fill my insides, and every cell in me thoroughly basks in the thrill. My eyes aren't closed, not even for one second, and a big goofy grin plasters itself to my face.

"Yi En, isn't this fu-" I say with a grin, turning towards the empty, bright red seat, and in less than a half second, the grin falls off my face, replaced with the pure look of horror that writes itself over my features.

Five long, attractive fingers are rested on the little raised bit of the car entrance, and shock jabs itself quickly at my heart, my heart even becoming shock itself.

"YI EN! YI EN GE GE!" I scream, tears spilling out of my eyes like an unbroken dam. Before I can holler anything else, he quivers, "Jia-Jia Er, don't save me. It's dangerous. The-the safety belt fell off during the drop. I'm sorry. Promise me you'll take care. I love you. You'll always be my hao di di. You're an amazing boy-and you're my number one, all I have left."

"I DON'T CARE! MARK YI EN TUAN, YOU'RE GOING TO TRY AND GET UP. YOU'RE ALL I HAVE LEFT. SOMEONE STOP THIS THING!" I screech, the world starting to be even more blurry than before, due to the panic posessing my mind, but I shake it off-I want to save Yi En. I don't even take notice of the eyes fixated on me and the other screams piercing the atmosphere as I pull off my safety belt to save the hand right in front of me.

Oh.

It's gone.

In front of my very eyes, I see the hand gradually slip off the red surface, and disappear into nothingness.

"YI EN! YI EN, WHY?" I cry, screaming and spitting out a torrent of colourful language at the heavens, for not letting my angel of a brother to live on. Pounding my feet against the metal floor which lets out silvery yelps of pain, I add on once I catch a small puff of breath, "YOU SAID THAT YOU'D BE WITH ME. YOU SAID THAT YOU'D ALWAYS BE THERE FOR ME. YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BREAK YOUR PROMISE LIKE THIS, COME BACK!" I recall how his voice would sing me to sleep, how he said that I'd always have his number if I needed him when I left for my outing that day, and the beats of my heart scream louder than ever, pounding against my chest and my head, both of which possess terrible stings.

He's gone.

Yi En's gone.

The only family I had.

I never cared about the kids who taunted, picked at the me who was parentless. I knew all that I required was the angel sent from heaven to protect me, chase away my nightmares, and most importantly, sent to teach me the ways of love and pain.

And this lesson, was definitely a stab in the heart.

The pain rings in my ear as darkness swallows me up-not that I'd mind, I wouldn't ever imagine a world without Yi En. My world spins around me like a hurricane of rollercoaster-greenery paintings before all my eyes envision is a pitch black, colour finally rid from my world.

I'm lying down.

Am I...

alive?

Or would I even have been alive in a world with colour, however still in a world without Yi En?

"Jackson-hyung..."

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